I am 35 years old and I have not touched my anus with my bare hands before

I am 35 years old and I have not touched my anus with my bare hands before.

ama

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i have bare patches on my lawn that ive been overseeding but the birds keep eating the seed. how do i stop them from eating it

Not even on accident while wiping your ass?

Alka seltzer tablets covered in sweet brown gravy

Touch your anus.

i know what this does and just might do it anyway

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Or just sit reseed and sit out there with a pellet gun and pop the little faggots in their little faggot assholes

You need to bury them about an inch. Also keep a remote vibrator near the patches

nope

i was doing this for a few days until i already killed like 12 pigeons. These animals are little mini clinton supporters they just refuse to look out for their own good

Maybe grilled pigeon is good?