Please help :(

Please help :(
How do I get it off without going to doctor?

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Poke a hole in the head and let the blood out. Once it's flaccid, pull the pipe off and put a band aid on the head.

cut it.. sry bro... dawin you know..

dats phucked

Sage

Take a video of doing this as a thanks for their help

You Need a saw for that metal tube. Sorry man but it will impossible without help. Call an ambulance or dick will die soon.

PS: haha

Slice through in the area right above the ballsack. Let all fluids drain out, get your SO (or vacuum cleaner) to suck everything out of the slit you just created until the entire penis is flat, like a crushed toilet roll. You may then slide off the metal.

this

say good bye to your doongle. Congratulations, you are a dickless retard now