>be my dog
>be house trained because my owners are intelligent enough to manage that
>dont tear into cushions, clothes, shoes because I am trained
>dont bark unless someone is walking around the front door, alerting owners to potential solicitors and deter petty thieves
>kill and eat small annoying pests like flies, beetles, spiders, etc
>dont need supervised walk or need my shit picked up because owners have a yard
>owners travelling not a hassle because they arent autistic fucks and have friends who can feed me for a few days
>scientifically proven to reduce stress just by being with owners
>warm cuddles in the winter time
>be cute as fuck and also fun to play with
shitty people have shitty dogs. Having a well trained dog is rewarding. It's just like having friends, which you people are constantly moaning about not having
