Tards help me, I'm stuck on the shiter and I'm out of TP...

Tards help me, I'm stuck on the shiter and I'm out of TP, it's the middle of the night so I can't call out for help and the TP is at the other end of the hallway
What do?

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Waddle

Take a shower afterwards.

use your hand and rinse it between wipes. wash after. it's not that bad

I can't, I'll make to much noise and I will trip in the dark

Just go for it. If you're uncomfortable, then just get completely naked first. If you have to clean up after, be sure to use vinegar as it will cover the smell.

I ain't no streetshiter to use my hand for wiping

You have to be 18 to post here

Waddle slowly

Best advice so far