What's an easy way to closesly replicate the feeling of a vagina?

What's an easy way to closesly replicate the feeling of a vagina?

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Shoot yourself in the groin and fuck the wound with your severed penis

Very funny, how the fuck am I supposed to get a gun in Britain?

I suggest hanging around muzzies until you get shot in the groin after one goes all Allah's Snackbar

Warm lube does a fairly good job. Need quite a bit of it though. It needs to have the consitency of hairgel but be a lubricant. The warmth plays a big role here, since microwaving your hand isnt an option, maybe put it in warm water for a while but idk, not perfect. A fleshlight that you can warm up is ideal.

A warm out of the oven Apple Pie from Costco

Dick

a hooker's vagina you broke fuck

Get one of these fill it with hot water not too hot ok ... fold in hafe use some cheap lube and stick your dick the fold and fuck ... feeling good man no joke I can cum after in one of these than a shity pussy but nothing beats cunt. Go for it bro thank me later

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Goose liver in a champaign glass.

Your bf's mouth

>no joke I can cum after in one of these than a shity pussy but nothing beats cunt.
What is this sentence even?

You could try fucking some ground beef. Make burgers later.

fuck a roast beef sandwich after microwaving it for 20 seconds

>20 seconds
you must have weak microwaves

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Get a whore

Large latex glove, surgical if you can, they have longer wrist portion. Roll it up in a towel with end sticking out and inversely wrapped it on the outer end. I then also wrap the towel roll with a belt and adjust for tightness. Shoot a small amount of lube/lotion/conditioner in the opening, wedge the roll between a couple pillows and go to town. Stronger cums than whacking it and easier cleanup than toys

You need to use petroleum jelly. It's sort of cloying at first but once the friction heats it up it is fucking amazing.

Then, what I like to do is like double fist my dick. I grip my hands together like Captain Kirk hammerfisting the Gorn.

Slide your dick between the palms of your hands and go to fucking work.

It will blow you goddamn mind.

Bake an eggplant for 30 minutes, let it cool, cut the end off and fuck away

Ziplock bag, little oil and put it between matress and box spring.

"Captain Kirk hammerfisting the Gorn". The jewel of this thread