The literal definition of perfection

>The literal definition of perfection
What did they mean by this Yea Forumsros? How can the other roasties even imagine to compete?

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>Canonically an ugly eldritch monstrosity that uses pheromones to brainwash you to make itself appear as an attractive female-like of your species so it can get your DNA which it then completely alters to remove your genetic code from it and spawn its own clone to prey on other horny males
Yeah, totally not a horrible choice.
Miranda is barren but at least she's human.

I'd rather fuck a hot illusion than Michel Jackson

This

Then why do they look hot in photos?

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Imagine being THIS gay

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>modded

Holy shit, retard user just got BTFO

That's some reddit-tier headcanon, based on a throw-away line by an NPC merely pondering the possibility of it being true.

How the fuck would they appear on video records or photos, you dumb fuck?

Inuniverse: the brainwashing persists after initial exposure to pheromones
Real reason: BioWare are hacks, plothole

Still, canonically Asari are eldritch abominations that prey on males and always use their bullshit to make themselves appear as whatever is hottest to the subject they prey on.
Fucking an Asari is worse than cuckoldry, it's actively contributing to slow genocide of your species.

That's what she canonically looks like, BioWare just sucks at modelling, always did.

Yvonne looks miles better than Miranda. Bioware, as usual, fucked up their character model.

>the brainwashing persists after initial exposure to pheromones
What if I've never met Liara, and you show me a photo that a 3rd party took of her?

Then how come Geth like Legion doesn't mention some horrible abomination walking around the ship?

BioWare plotholes.

Or it's just easier to accept that your fan theory doesn't make any sense

It's literally official canon from the fucking games themselves you literal faggot that didn't even play them

L I T E R A L P E R F E C T I O N

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Ashley was right even if her face was beat. Fuck aliens, humanity forever.

>cute face
>and big milkers
Perfection indeed

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>Those chubby cheeks
>That fragile small nose
>Those bright eyes and the freckles under them

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Ashley is a tranny so not much better.

what was it about liara bros
i cant quite put my finger on it but shes so perfect

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>B-bro my headcanon is true I-I swear
Fucking stfu already Mr Cringemaster

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I dont give a shit, she makes peepee hard. If human women wanted to get fucked, they should have tried harder.

Why when on Thessia are the Asari statues all look like their in-game appearance?

It's literal canon from the game you horny 12 year old c󠛡u󠛡m󠛡b󠛡r󠛡a󠛡i󠛡n

She's not even the best girl in her own franchise.

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Gonna post evidence besides the flimsy bachelor party dialogue?

youre a straight retard mordin hypothesizes that the reason he wants to fuck asari too is because of a interspecies appeal that they benefit from that was it go be a retard somewhere else lul

its a cross range of things, she possesses qualities rarely seen together (small nose, oval facial shape, BIG milkers, the alien blue-skin and eye tone)

AHEM

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Imagine taking the dialogue between 3 drunkards as fact

Unironically this, the only "real" competition to Queen Liara is another fucking alien lmao

What mod is it?

Are you refering to that part in the bar in ME2 where some guys talk about the asari? Or there is any other source for this interpretation.

However asari gender is defined, they are innately different from humans, for asari can mate and successfully reproduce with any other gender or species through a form of parthenogenesis. Although they have one gender, they are not asexual and do in fact require a partner to reproduce. However, asari reproduction is very different from other forms of sexual reproduction. An asari provides two copies of her own genes to her offspring, one of which is passed on unaltered. The second set of genes is altered in a unique process called melding, also known as the joining or the union. During melding, the eyes of the asari initiating the meld dilate as she consciously attunes her nervous system to her partner's, sending and receiving electrical impulses directly through the skin, however physical contact is not strictly necessary. A common phrase used before melding is "embrace eternity," presumably to help focus the partner's mind. Effectively, the asari and her partner briefly become one unified nervous system, sharing memories, thoughts, and feelings. The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father" and in the case that the offspring is of two asari, the father is the one who does not give birth.

>The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father"
>The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father"
>The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father"
>The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father"
>The offspring is always an asari, regardless of the species or sex of the "father"

Enjoy contributing to stealth genocide of humans through sex

i wish she was romanceable.

i said no to this chick about 20 times over 3 games and she wouldnt take no for an answer. Chick is a psycho-rapist that only the most autist of incels incapable of making their own move would find hot.

So... Genestealers?

thank you I will enjoy it

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this, OP is a retard

It's not some physic or phermone-based appearance alteration. The only "canon" is that Mordin suggests due to the way they breed, they have traits that all the different species that have bred them over the years find attracive (bodies that humans like, the head crests/tentacles that Turians like, etc)

>Of your species
Same with racemixing.

Maybe but that doesn’t mean she was wrong. Aliens are scum, real chads roll with Cerberus and crush them beneath our booted heal.

Geth are kinda cool though.

>What is physical attraction?
O MY AUTISM

Stop reminding me this franchise even exists. They did nothing with it. What a waste. It could have been just a comfy Star Trek series of games with each new entry doing some new thing with different planet but no they had to go and fuck it up.

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Fuck ayylmaos indeed, xeno scum needs to be purged.

>Enjoy contributing to stealth genocide of humans through sex
Thank you, I believe I shall

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Literally nobody likes this methed out rape victim except lesbians

Play Andromeda with mods user, it's good now!

I still think about her, bros

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I bet her uterus is like a cavern: stalactites and stalagmites of semen

Asari are the most boring fictional race ever created. Exist solely for waifufags. Best part of 3 was taking along Javek and Liara just to hear him smack her the fuck down over and over.

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based
Jack unironical best girl

Doctor Chocolates

This. And then when she's all sad afterwards you can cuddle her and give her the fug

>Exist solely for waifufags
>Hairless blue people with tentacles
>Oh no without eyebrows they'll look weird
Yeah you couldn't possibly do anything other than human eyebrows, just play it as safe as possible

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based

Nah fuck that give me a turian bf. Hell I'll even ingest. I'll die how I lived: sucking cock and disappointing my father

>chicken legs
>if she gets naked she dies
Imagine picking Tali, out of all the other girls OH NONONO

>Getting a footjob from this qt

I almost wasted hundreds of dollars on this statue but cancelled just in time

this is why asaris look ugly as fuck is ME:A
our AI brain counteracts the brainwashing

wasted?

No it's the autism. Asari influence can't affect autistic minds. That is why Sara is best girl.

Peebee is cute tho

NO.

>Forced to accept her into the crew
>Can't tell her to fuck off
>Can't jettison her even though she stays in an escape pod

Fuck Bioware

based

Who was the best date in Citadel and why is it Jack?

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Built for human pussy

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Wrex

Are there even any girls in real life that barely look like pic related? I unironically can't imagine something this perfect existing in our cringe reality

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It's the thick ass eye liner
I don't know why but it's magic

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This is the person she is supposedly modeled after. Painter her blue and shave her head and you can kinda see it

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A man of true taste

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Liara is for normaltards who just accept what's put in front of them and use the "canon" romance
Tali is for waifufags who unironically own body pillows
Jack is for edgy faggots who worship girls who swear a lot because they're """""unique"""""
The thinking man's choice is Miranda or Ashley

Finally, a man with taste.

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Not quite it but she a cute indeed

Holy fuck user thanks so much for this!

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This man speaks the truth.

Best girl is me

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my favorite part of mass effect

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>normalfags doing anything besides playing soldier and romancing the standard human girl companion
Nigga please

Literally just donate to a sperm bank on Earth. Dozens of bitches would want Vanderloo genetics for their offspring

>BASEBALL GLOVE HEADED SHITLORD
>PERFECT

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>thinking man's choice
>default human party member

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I read this in Rich's voice.

>Miranda or Ashley

They're more normie choices than Liara. Most normies I've met who've played the game picked one of these two. And this is coming from someone who hates Liara and wishes there was an option to kill her or at least let her die ingame.

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>Literally refuses to rejoin your crew after you return from death
>Even if you romanced her
Fucking roastie

>Reminder that Tali is the only female who stays with you from beginning to end
>Reminder that Bioshit fucked her over with that fucking photoshopped pic
Justice for Tali!

>perfect
that's not the best boy

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Literally the most boring Asari you meet in the whole game. Making any of the other ones squad members would of made for a better character.

Aria T'loak would have been great.

>Not even best asari
>Femshep is actual best girl
lmaoing at your writer pet still getting a mediocre romance. Really though, on replay it's kinda odd. She's clearly favored, but at the same time the romance feels barely there. At least Tali gets the Rannoch arc and some adorable banter on the dreadnaught. Miranda is really short, same with Jack. What honestly happened?

based and mommypilled

You're a qt

Reminder that human life expectancy is like 150.
Fucking Chakwas is like being with a 30 or 40 year old woman.

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>no option for femshep to romance her evil clone

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>never ever

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>Perfection
Until 2. 2 ruined her by making her a bitter, manipulative, evil cunt.

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>bitter, manipulative, evil cunt.
I get the feeling this applies more to you than her user.

you can't, I mean half the criticism of her tends to be
>m-muh writers pet
though to be fair romancing her is designed to have the most flavor and to make the most sense
>it's another user parroting bullshit that isn't even true and is based on the throwaway lines of a bunch of drunks at a bachelors party
this is on par with retards harping about tali being a thief

>this is on par with retards harping about tali being a thief
The quarian ship you can inspect does have tach stolen from the normandy tho. The only question is if Tali stole it or if they got it from other military leaks like the Salarians.

>ashley
good god, nobody unironically romances her after the first mistake right?
she's been left on virmire ever since

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>The quarian ship you can inspect does have tach stolen from the normandy tho.
from a normandy made by cerberus, who technically stole the plans themselves, and who if you went paragon you outright told her to study

the thing is is that 90% of the retards on here who parrot that don't event have the timeline correct, half the time they believe she "stole" it in 1

Did you even talk to her or read/hear what others had to say about her since your death, user?

I hear you've been working with Reapers to steal human women.

>ok yes she's now the leader of an intergalactic information cabal that has a history of spying, theft, murder, extortion, terrorism, arson, assault, bribery, fraud, slander, drug trade, arms trade, slave/"indentured servitude" trade, etc.
>but "no you lol" if you don't like that
She can't just drop all that shit either, leaving such lucrative fields would instantly be suspect and her followers would go dark.

>Bioware cockblocked us in 2 and 3 and just gives us a little scene on the Citadel DLC
IT'S NOT FAIR

>Can't have a gay three way with Grunt and Wrex

Krogan are too baby focus to do gay sex.

She knows you cheated on her with Miranda and Jack, thats why.

I'm sure you could find a few who are off tuchanka, like that poetry obsessed one from illium
wrex definitely would be a no though

But I didn't, I don't have disgusting shit taste for British thots and hobgoblins.

They'd do it for Shep out of sheer respect. Wrex won't enjoy it. Grunt might.

Grut sees Shepard as a parent since s/he basically "birth" Grunt by releasing him from the pod. Unless Grunt has a daddy/mommy kink.

>there are "people" here still deny 2 was the best one
When will zoom zooms remember Yea Forums was a Tali board?

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>t. retard
You realize camera's are a thing right?

I like the fanfics where Shepard is raised by other species.

>Wrex just stares at you dead in the eye while it happens
>when you finish he just mutters 'Shepard'

literally a space nigger
outbreeding your genes with their own, disgusting xeno genes.

She also did it all for Shepard. People change when they lose one they love, for good or for bad.

Survival of the fitness, niggie. Smarts and brains only help you for so long against sex appeal.

What was she suppose to do? Just drop the entire information network she had on a whim?

>bioware didn't add a 'finger your evil clone into submission.' option
fucks sake

I hated 2 and 3 because of the thermal clips bullshit. Best waifus though, I give you that.

She's too easy, and the Witcher 3 tried to solve this with timed dialogue events. Funny thing about that, you could tab out of the game and check out the options. I know because I did. I blame it on the Djin fuck you.

Citadel DLC is cringe and fagpilled
the party itself is ok, the arena is bueno, everything else is cringeworthy as fuck
>there was originally a hybrid system for guns
>playtesters were too retarded to understand
can they stop getting literal retards to playtest their game? Imagine these monkeys trying to playtest Morrowind

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You're not wrong. She was a cute, innocent archaeologist in ME 1 and that was kino cuteness

I have no idea what that means and you're weird.
Did they offer an option to fall in love with Liara after 1? That would actually make more sense with Lair of the Shadowbroker. You seeing her as a pathetic lovestruck kid in the first game vs. a competent person in well, a lot in 2. I only tried the full route from 1 so I don't know.

>Citadel DLC is cringe and fagpilled
Don't be an edgy retard. It was ___fun___. It was campy, you got to see all the crew together, it had more entertainment then half the main missions and most of the side ones, and a fun. Plus the camera work was some of the best in series, and the soundtracks were solid.

drive.google.com/file/d/1SRyREcCSuCzGnVhp9KEgcAuoirraQ4zQ/view?usp=drivesdk

And she still acts and does evil even when you're back.

>does evil
>takes down a semi-evil organization who was about to sell your body to the collectors and is the only reason you got revived in 2
fucking nani?

Positive fan feedback on the Citadel DLC led directly to Andromeda being a quip filled fuckfest. It was always gonna be trash but "they liked the marvel movie humor so throw that at everything", seeing the crew together is fine but fuck me if this isnt the most stupid gay shit
youtube.com/watch?v=Pj6iDczCDOI

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There was something about her voice and "accent" that I didn't like.
My Shepard broke off with her as soon as Tali was an option.

She continues to run her evil corporation and then later usurps the Shadow Broker position, aka the biggest evil boss of the most evil business that rules over all the other evil businesses thanks to having all their dirt one. So she's still evil and keeps the bitchy attitude.

Hint: It's a ME animation. ;)

I really wouldn't. It's Fornax 8.0 nigga and you aint ready. Also I didn't click it either.

>She continues to run her evil corporation and then later usurps the Shadow Broker position, aka the biggest evil boss of the most evil business that rules over all the other evil businesses thanks to having all their dirt one. So she's still evil and keeps the bitchy attitude.
you mean more like
>semi keeps up appearances with her network that is then like 99% devoted to dealing with the reapers within 6 months
also I'm genuinely not sure what you did to get her to be a bitch to shepard because even in 2 she's nice to you

>javekcels

>semi keeps up appearances with her network
Nice headcanon.
>Even in 2 she's nice to you
No she isn't, she keeps a cold and professional attitude and talks about muh necessary evils.

>Nice headcanon.
I'm pretty sure it'd be obvious if she was going more yahg style SB, actually that would've been a nice possibility come to think about it
>No she isn't, she keeps a cold and professional attitude and talks about muh necessary evils.
m8 even if you didn't romance her she hugs you and damn near breaks down in tears, and when you're not talking about the shadow broker/after finishing the dlc she notably softens

>Positive fan feedback on the Citadel DLC led directly to Andromeda being a quip filled fuckfest.
Idk about that, feels like giving too much credit to the C team. And it it's true then they didn't understand that the DLC was great because it explored something new to the universe while also breaking away from the grim or sad overall tones of the game at every other step. And considering it's right before shit goes sideways (or through mods an epilogue to a stressful journey), some gay shit marvel humor is fine. It was pretty funny at a lot of parts.

>I'm pretty sure it'd be obvious if
That's not how it is in game, user.
>She
Sits down in her chair and acts her part. She's surprised to see you, but that's pretty much it.
>She softens
Once she's basically taken the most evil position in the galaxy after heading Cerberus.

>That's not how it is in game, user.
care to show me somewhere where she's shown to be Yahg tier cartoon evil when she's the Shadow Broker? because I'm calling shenanigans
>Sits down in her chair and acts her part. She's surprised to see you, but that's pretty much it.
I take it you didn't bother much with the side dialogues? nor did the paragon interrupt in the dlc?

>care to show me somewhere where she's shown
Does she need to be shown? Maintaining and using that position is done entirely through evil acts, you can't transform such a thing.
>I take it
I was nice to her at first and grateful for saving my body, but was persistently critical of her bitchy new attitude and her evil business dealings.

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I like her voice

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Some drunkards speculate about it in 2 but that's it.

titty milk island as seen in TLJ

hey user
sorry I'm not real

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"D-Doctor Chackwas my pee pee hurts c-can you take a look at it?"