I want to kill myself and probably going to do it this weekend...

just watch the baywatch intro, always gets my mood up
youtube.com/watch?v=PldT2jq7ApM

He talks about loving life and shit

consider pic related before killing yourself you fucking gay faggot

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To fix your life, you first need to believe that you both deserve and can have better. No book can make you believe that.

I'm sorry for you user, goodbye.

too bad, how have you planned on fixing issues you're repressing without facing them? If you want meaning you first have to face yourself

We're worried about you OP, please don't do anything fucking dumb. I don't know the exacts of what you're going through; all I know is that I and many others who've been in your position have come through it, wiser and more grateful for life than ever - I can probably mention that the majority if not all people who unsuccessfully attempt suicide are happy that they didn't succeed, indeed, it seems to me that every life - no matter how miserable - is worth living.

This Thourue quote rings especially true for me:
>However mean your life is, meet and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names. It is not so bad as you are. It looks poorest when you are richest. The fault-finder will find faults even in paradise. Love your life, poor as it is. You may perhaps have some pleasant, thrilling, glorious hours, even in a poorhouse. The setting sun is reflected from the windows of the almshouse as brightly as from the rich man’s abode; the snow melts before its doors as early in the spring.

So your asking for non-religious book recommendations, the stoics, particularly Marcus Aurelius have been helpful. There's lots of wisdom around (even in religious books, I tell you, it can't hurt to have an open mind when you're suicidal, can it?).

Many strangers give a fuck about you, please seek help.

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>the stoics
they approved of suicide on certain occasions
>If the room is smoky, if only moderately, I will stay; if there is too much smoke I will go. Remember this, keep a firm hold on it, the door is always open

Religion is the only answer in the sense that you must come to terms with being wrong. You are literally doing it all to yourself. What you see in the world is you. We can only imagine how much of the language of Yea Forums you've internalized

>we live in a society
If you struggle with depression go see a psychiatrist and get medicated because if all you’ve got to look to is “society” and “the future” you’re in for one shitty ride

>because if all you’ve got to look to is “society” and “the future” you’re in for one shitty ride
explain

>explain
You seem to already note this in your OP as the reason for this thread? But okay...

People are imperfect and self motivated and the future is inherently unpredictable. Life is stress and hardship.

try to remember what love feels like and find the people you loved and try to connect with them, even if it means setting aside pride and admitting weakness.

I'm not OP, you halfwit. I was hoping for a more profound reasoning instead of >dude life is hard lmao

Anti-Oedipus and A Thousand Plateaus by Deleuze and Guattari. From AO:
>Producing, a product: a producing/product identity. It is this identity that constitutes a third term in the linear series: an enormous undifferentiated object. Everything stops dead for a moment, everything freezes in place—and then the whole process will begin all over again. From a certain point of view it would be much better if nothing worked, if nothing functioned. Never being born, escaping the wheel of continual birth and rebirth, no mouth to suck with, no anus to shit through. Will the machines run so badly, their component pieces fall apart to such a point that they will return to nothingness and thus allow us to return to nothingness? It would seem, however, that the flows of energy are still too closely connected, the partial objects still too organic, for this to happen. What would be required is a pure fluid in a free state, flowing without interruption, streaming over the surface of a full body. Desiring-machines make us an organism; but at the very heart of this production, within the very production of this production, the body suffers from being organized in this way, from not having some other sort of organization, or no organization at all. "An incomprehensible, absolutely rigid stasis" in the very midst of process, as a third stage: "No mouth. No tongue. No teeth . No laryn x. No es ophagus. No belly. No anus." The automata stop dead and set free the unorganized mass they once served to articulate. The full body without organs is the unproductive, the sterile, the unengendered, the unconsumable. Antonin Artaud discovered this one day, finding himself with no shape or form whatsoever, right there where he was at that moment. The death instinct: that is its name, and death is not without a model. For desire desires death also, because the full body of death is its motor, just as it desires life, because the organs of life are the working machine

Fast for a week. I mean cut out everything, and sit in a dark room. While you're fasting think about getting the chance to brutally sodomize butterfly.

>skizzo ramblings

You're not wrong

In our imperfection an aspect expects more than what is. An honest effort is met with insults. Life is so hard that we're expected of more by even random anons doing what seems to be their best impression of a restaurant manager, continuing the cycle of misery

did a restaurant manager ever call you a half-wit?

Kitchen language is a lot more evolved than that

The works of our prophet and sage Delicious Tacos.

>The beginning of love. When she’s gone I masturbate to POV porn of girls that look like her. Cum in me they say. Please sir get me pregnant daddy.

>Want to be rolling around in bed with her right now. Not here on lunch break. Sniffing her armpits. Exploring her asshole three millimeters deep through panties so the panties smell and not my finger. Licking her fat tongue. Playing with her coarse black horse tail hair as it cascades over my inguinal crease. Pushing raw into her tortured little shitpipe with just my spit as she squeals into the pillow. Pumping twice and spurting goo so hard at such high pressure my urethra stings. Is she autistic.

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Dont do it user, if a clod be washed away, Europe is the lesser

Stop shilling this garbage on here

The humanities will not help you. They originated in the minds of men and so are imperfect. You need to see the wonders of a field of study that exists beyond man.
Read Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden braid.
Realise that you exist in a reality so rich that the efforts of the greatest minds in all of human history can't unravel it's underlying structure-

OP, I'm going to drop the pretentious tone I take when I'm on this board for second.
Look around you. The universe is beautiful. The human condition may be dark, but it's a blip in the timeline of the enigma to end all enigmas. Go to your local library and spend a few hours flipping through popular science textbooks. Find something you're interested in, be it physics, pure mathematics, computer science or biology or whatever. Man, if you're interested in sociology, economics, history or psychology, then go ahead and read pop-sci books on that. Just find something a field that exists regardless if anybody is interested in it or not.
Once you've combed through the science section of your library, honestly ask yourself whether there was something, anything, that you wanted to know more about. Then, realise that you'd be betraying one of the purest traits that being a human has given you - the childlike curiosity to know more about the world - if you don't at least try and learn more about that something.
"Yeah, I've tried that, but I didn't find anything that interested me", you might say. Bullshit, mate: human knowledge and the wonders of the natural world are simply too diverse for you to have combed through it with any degree of thoroughness. Look harder.
This might be your last chance. You might never again get the opportunity to experience a sliver of the universal structure that has entranced great men and women who are smarter than you and smarter than me. There's so much beauty out there, so many problems just waiting to be solved... and so much potential if you'd just stop and look. If there's anything that science shows us, it's that things don't always have to be the way they are.

Real shit OP, the onIy thing that stopped me from carrying out the detailed plan for my suicide a few years back was the nonlinear dynamics textbook I'd bought the year I graduated, but never got round to reading before then. I remember brushing the hundred-odd cigarette stubs strewn over my filthy desk onto the even filthier floor, then sitting down to read the first chapter and do some exercises. The rest is history.
Good luck OP
> inb4 gtfo my board STEMfag

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Tired of you shitty whiny suicidal babies shitting up this board. Get it over with and stop sharing your suicidal intentions .

I can't say it will stop you, but I would read some pro-suicide sentiments and reflect on the matter. How to Die is a collection from Seneca, I plan to read it before making my mind up either way

>ask dumb question
>get simple answer
>be mad
Lol what a fucking retard

Delicious Tacos is our Houellebecq, show respect.

whats the reason?

>Read Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden braid
>Realise that you exist in a reality so rich that the efforts of the greatest minds in all of human history can't unravel it's underlying structure-
truism
>The universe is beautifu
not inherently and most definitely not in its entirety, so irrelevant
>Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden
stemfag autism. don't know how much it helps you with either godel or escher, but I can say that you'll get absolutely nothing useful in regards to Bach
> Go to your local library and spend a few hours flipping through popular science textbooks.
lol
>the onIy thing that stopped me from carrying out the detailed plan for my suicide a few years back was the nonlinear dynamics textbook I'd bought the year I graduated,
then you were most likely not even depressed and your 'detailed plan' was some imitation of some poorly understood fiction you read from time to time
your understanding of depression is laughable

if OP leans towards ethical/moral/virtuous existence in a western sense, he might give up suicide by considering certain some states of the human conditioned as presented by writers like Dostoyevsky, Tolstoy and Hugo.
if, on the other hand, he leans towards unethical/amoral existence, he might give up suicide by being a complete ass of a human being by reading along the lines of Nietzsche and other neurotic writers that deal solely with the empirical.
note: not a single book saves you from suicide (if you're actually considering to do it, not just larping about it), it may just raise a few interesting questions that you couldn't get to by yourself; you cope for a while by going deeper into those questions and from a certain point you're back to non-suicidal non-coping normal state

>I "want to" kill myself
>please o please anonymous, lavish me with attention and reccomend me books which will stop me from killing myself (or else I'm really going to do it!)

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desu no ones gonna kill themselves in 2019

>this in itself is not a furthering of attention
And then user was enlightened

If you’re serious then listen up kid. Whenever you’re sat doing nothing, think about what options are open to you right now, as in your immediate next action. You feel this way because you feel powerless and like you have no control. Think and focus on each option you have for the next thing you can do, make sure each one is actually viable, visualise yourself doing it to make sure.
Then pick one and do it. No matter how trivial the action is. Do this as many times as you can in a day, whenever you feel helpless stop and count all your possible viable options. Visualise yourself doing each one if it helps. You need to gradually realise that you have the capacity to take your life anywhere you want, you have gotten into a routine where you have forgotten that you have these choices to make. I don’t care whether you kys or not i’m just giving you necessary advice.

Listen to Freedom by Amen Dunes and read Yu Hua

don't kill yourself my dude

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I've never considered suicide, because i'll crawl like a maggot on the ground because taking my life.
However, for people like you, take mushrooms, or Ayahuasca.
Then you'll be cured.
Good night.

(...)
(instead of)

Not possible. Only the French could create Hollo, and only the French deserve him.

have a week full of parties, sluts, alcohol and drugs.
If you still want to kill yourself after that, then just do it, but wait a couple of months so you can donate your organs

Society is fine

Accept the world around you and accept yourself in it

I don’t understand suicide. It’s pointless. You’re just going to die one day in any case. What’s the rush, faggot?

> truism
then why do so many people not recognise it? why are so many people content to consider it as an afterthought?
> not inherently and most definitely not in it's entirety, so irrelevant
lol you wouldn't know a damn thing about this
> stemfag autism
you clearly haven't read the book lmao
> your understanding of depression is laughable
holy shit this guy is gatekeeping mental illness
*cringe*

the problem with applying the traditional ethics/morals/virtues discussed in the works of your listed writers is the extent by which the cultural attitudes differ to to our own. take the plot of Anna Karenina, for instance: would it make sense if it was set in 21st century? Would it be as meaningful? I think not. We're living in times where even gender roles, the cornerstone of all societies for likely the entirety of human history, are slowly losing their formerly axiomatic status. Society is changing rapidly: whilst many of the themes of literature are still pertinent, the ethical/moral/virtuous considerations you're upholding - especially if you're citing fucking Dostoyevsky of all people - are no longer as clear-cut as you've convinced yourself they are.

I was going to call you a retard and whatnot, but no; rather, I feel sorry for you that you think the way you do. Your path to erudition is old and it's wayside is slowly crumbing to dust. You're just as lost as the rest of us, only you don't think you are.

Take a look at Cerebus. It's a very particular lit/co fusion, and the guy technically predicted the current age.

If you commit suicide this weekend, it's going to be like the last issue of Cerebus, but in a bad way. Take a look at that work, user, there is analysis of society, politics and religion in it. A true independent work of art.

At the end of the day, there is no book or work of art that can completely restore our will to live as if it were software or anti-virus running in our minds. There is beauty in its expressions, but we are the individuals who define our own paths and meanings. Remember, if you are still alive for this Monday, there is still a real possibility of a real change that is not zero. If you commit suicide, there is no possibility of change whatsoever.

Dying is easy and we reduce our power over our immediate world to zero. Nothing mutates without us, to remain alive in our personal context is the true ontological challenge of our secret existence. Being here and being able to communicate with each other is worth trying to move forward. user for me has always been one of the reasons why I am still here. The son of a bitch makes me laugh.

I wish you rectification and calibration. True will, clarity and peace.

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Stop trying to make everyone else in the thread want to kill themselves too with this lame 40 year old boomer dogshit

Unironically go on a camping trip. Take a few days off, no internet, no books, no nothing, and see afterwards. I get it if you still go through with it, I've been there, but changing your environment even if just for a few days can change your mindset. If you have money, consider traveling. Might as well use all of it before you go.

>Books are a guideline for other people experiences

I see this board is retarded as ever.

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Any books that are kind of like this, but a bit different—I despise being alive but I don’t feel any urge to end my life, nor am I unhappy or depressed.