Itt my opinions on books i've never read

A an extended pastoral poem in which the milking of cows acts as a metaphor for Bush Sr. administration. The cows teets, which seem to be without number, are described in detail, and have been interpreted as stand-in's for real life figures, some historical, others known to the other himself, in a manner that is in some ways comparable to Dante's Divine comedy. The first tit, which is described as a mustachioed strongman, most likely representing Sadam Hussein, gives no milk, which leads the anonymous narrator to plaintively evoke the sacred Muse-Within-The-Cow and begin his direful song. An important twentieth century contribution to pastoral political allegory. 9/10 would read again.

Keep the Giraffe Burning

lonesome dove

Grail-Diving in Shangrilla with the World's Last Mime

A series of philosophical fragments, in the presocratic style, that take the form of Koan-esque paradoxes. The first paradox is as follows:
"The sun cast his shadow
and that shadow was the light"
This paradox was discovered by the author, Fred Johsnon-Washington-Harvey-De La Plaza, scrawled onto a urinal in a public restroom in Dusseldorf. The overall gist of these pithy aphorisms seems to be that knowledge and ignorance are mutually reinforcing principles, that knowledge is a form of ignorance, that is, ignorance of the opposite proposition, and ignorance is a form of knowledge, a unique state of being which is lost when a certain knowledge enters the picture obscuring what was an authentic state, the state of knowing-ignorance, in its own right. The author died of AIDS before he could begin the second part in which the theory would be more clearly elaborated.

The text is believed to be original source for the myth of the Wicker Man. In the Kalahari desert, a tribe of uncivilized savages were known to sacrifice their firstborn children to a giant effigy of a giraffe-god, Keembakatulih'yakweeto, and his concubine, the hippopotamus-godess, Shiwaka. This text can hardly be considered literature, and is more comparable to an African voodoo grimoire, relating specific instructions on how to maximize the benefits of child-sacrifice through various herbs and spices that the cruel giraffe-god finds pleasing. For example, one who wished to see his enemies dead is enjoined to sprinkle paprika and pepper on his child's feet and hands, evidently a metaphor for rendering the actions (hands-feet) of one's enemies incapable. The text is in a rather savage metrical style.

Attached: NoMLB.jpg (273x400, 42K)

Rainer Maria Rilke, is a novel by The Notebooks of Malte Laurids Brigge. It revolves around the story of Rainer "Rain Man" Rilke, an autistic savant who lives in the total seclusion of a garden shed while his ancestral home stands in state of complete disrepair, and his love affair with his house keeper, Maria, who is hired at the beginning of the novel by his estranged aunt who becomes concerned for the state of the ancestral manor. The author, The Notebooks of Malte Laurids Brigge, was known, herself, to be an autistic savant, and the novel is generally considered to be at least partly autobiographical.

Lonesome Dove is the posthumous title of the collected blogposts of I

The Sot-Weed Factor

>Grail-Diving in Shangrilla with the World's Last Mime
Autobiographical memoir of Julio Cortez-Villaflor, the founder of the Corona beer company. Unsurprisingly, the recipe of the beer was accidentally discovered when he woke up one morning with a hangover and accidentally poured one of his bedside piss-bottles into a half empty cup of Budweiser. A thoroughly uninteresting biography about an individual of no historical significance.

Hadrian the Seventh

A fictional study of the Sot-Weed factor, the inverse corollary of the Dunning-Kruger effect. Essentially, intellectual knowledge hampers one's capacity for visceral dasein, a sensuous knowing-by-not-knowing. Thus, intellectually "advanced" individuals have only a shadowy inkling of the true character of sense impression, of the feeling of living in the world and among others, and due to their lack of comprehension regarding sense experience cannot appreciate the wisdom-of-not-knowing experienced by the ignorant. Furthermore, their intellectual capacities lead them to assert their superiority in other domains for which they are not qualified. This text was highly influential on "The Shadow of the Sun. Some say the author of this book, Marcus Garvey (no relation to the Jamaican figure), was the one who scrawled the verses on the urinal in Dusseldorf mentioned in the post above.

Hadrian the Seventh is a fanfiction by deviantart user Hadrianfanforlyfe. It is his proposed sequel to the sixth book in the Hadrian series of novels which are largely drawn from the "furry subculture". The novel is too horrific to describe, and should be consigned to total destruction by public book burning.

>fictional
nonfictional*

Not too far off from the real thing desu

These are rather bad descriptions, but I guess they serve as writing practice for you. Maybe.

I'm bored, and you're probably right

How To Read A Book

Nice post OP :^)

Based

Yeah, I don't understand the point of this thread.

The Dwarf by Par Lagerkvist