Is this what happens when Yea Forums gets published?

What a disgrace OP

You know the rules. I'm sorry to see you go

What book

If you post tits everyone will stop hating you.

I’ve posted and that did not happen

Pretty close. Here's a passage from a Yea Forums user's novel.

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I fucking hate it when authors use ", I smirk" at the end of a bit of dialogue
Smirking means smiling a bit. It has nothing to do with how you say things. It's not like he laughed, or whispered, or rasped, or crowed. It doesn't make any sense. It's text based porn game-tier.

This, quite certainly, has, a rather, idiosyncratic, writing style, if I do, say so, myself. Niggers.

Well, I must say that this, and I've seen quite a few based things, is certifiably based, or as the it implies, cool, and redpilled.

>I’ve posted and that did not happen
I'm BEGGING you
PLEASE

For sure, and I say for sure with great surety, for sure this tome, alluding to the apparent quantity of its pages, that this tome, this tome is in possession of naught but two qualities thus far: the quality of being "based," and the quality of being "redpilled." Disregard that I suck cocks

Then they weren’t good enough.

This is from Bleeding Edge btw

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Wa...what the FUCK? How many reviews does this have? 356 pages wew. He could have at least made the self insertion less obvious.

They didn't, though. "I smirk" was a seperate sentence from the first half of the dialogue, which ended with an exclamation point.

stop shilling your gay book

in nausea by sartre there's a bit where he ponders what a girl he's staring at thinks of her own breasts. at least op's book gets straight to the point without all that existential jibber jabber.

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POST EM

God - she has that really cheap Latina hooker look to her that makes me rock hard.

is the narrator from the north of england?
if so he could just be smirking tabs

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you know it's jessy dubai, right?

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Your point being?
>slowly raises eyebrow in sync with my dick

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WE ALL NEED THEM

Meh, most everything that gets published these days is on the same level, or worse than this.

>man...this is fucking awful.
>Writer: ok you fucking pleb, well it's obviously over your head, I bet you didn't even miss that the third letter of ever word forms a coded script that spells out how I'm writing a bad piece ironically, or that my tabs are one space longer than usual, I'm a fucking genius dude. I mean, got a MFA, who the hell else who's being published these days can brag about that? Get on my fucking level bro.

At least the one In op's pic doesnt talk about how each vaginia is it's own galaxy for 6 pages.

fair enough user
she can put her peepee in my pooper any time

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I think it's "it's kind of a funny story"

Based Sid.

>Anal Sex
H E A T H E N !
E
A
T
H
E
N

that's not bad

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>nipples
>raspberries
this brings a horrible image to mind. Someone shoop a skin-coloured raspberry on a breast! I'd hate to see that.

some white women have red/pinkish nipple/areola, almost like raspberry color, especially when they are aroused.

>be Yea Forumsizen
>be praised
>be published
choose two

who is this? almost reads a bit like an american kingsley amis

This is literally my internal monologue

reading this actually gets me triggered

>page 356
Goddamn how could one man even be expected to wade through the slag to even get to that point