Write what's on your mind

I’m at a Polish wedding. I’m taking a shit. I’ve lived here for 5+years so I should really know the language bit I don’t because I’m lazy. I don’t want to leave the shitter!

>be me, in a ship, at night
>reading a relatively big book (Sleepwalkers,Christopher Clarks)
>sitting somewhere with no other people near
>2 girls pass by, one very young and cute the other old and ugly
>speak in some language I don't understand, maybe a slavic one, standing more or less behind my back
>pretty sure they giggled a bit
>then I hear that sound phones do when they take a photo, DID SHE JUST TAKE A FUCKING PICTURE OF ME?!
>then they sit down near me (about 2 metres maybe, just one chair between)
>they keep talking in the foreign language while I'm reading, cute one drinking some soft drink
>after some time they just up and leave
>search for her for the next 20 hours until the ship arrives at the destination

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I think the FSB was building their file on you user. Go up against the russian government lately?

Hmm not really I am a russo-phile but I did express some political ambitions that would be of huge influence in Russia and other nations and the whole political climate but I don't think anybody took that seriously (not that I am not serious about it) it was just 2 snippets on here and some other chans

just don't drink any tea for the next couple years

Ok, I don't like tea too much anyway

I ate all the cookies
the cookies are gone and it's not a good thing

I get less bitter when I drink.
I think I should drink more

Same desu, I'm much more friendly after a few beers if I'm around people. I just get sad when I drink alone though (I have been getting angry lately too, which I guess is an improvement)

I like being angry. When I'm angry, I feel more motivated than any other time. Alcohol doesn't make me angry though, it just relaxes me, and makes me more sociable when around people, like you said

You've hurt a lot of people and cost your family thousands in legal fees they can't afford. You are an ungrateful prick. I can't believe anyone is still looking out for you. I don't feel safe around you and hope you disappear. Imagine if people knew the real you.

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On my second drink and going back of trans timelines again, no idea why I'm so drawn to them. Mesmerizing, for me at least

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my brother killed himself yesterday or this morning. If you love your siblings, then go tell them that you love them.

That really sucks user. Sorry to hear that, my condolences

Thanks man. Im gonna miss my buddy

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It's not injury you should fear in joining the military, it's mind-numbing boredom and not being able to do anything by yourself. On the other hand you grew up in a cult church which tells me military life would suit you.

If you end up in Iran, do try to survive and write a book about it. In all truth I don't think a war will happen. That said the social conditions at large seem to be in a state of dire tension and fragility.

Coast Guard is the way to go

I don't love my sibling.

Conway arkansas, theres a civil war graveyard. Ive never read so many last names that share the same last names as people ive just randomly known in my life.

There's something strange about what the completion of human to themselves looks like on the outside. Something about that dissonance, that disconnect in understanding. I just wonder what someone looks like in their mind, or, what does someone look like when you forgo the direct sensation of sight for the intermediated thoughts and memories of a self that can never properly have a direct impression of "it-self". I don't know, this is probably the sloppiest post I've ever made

More research should be conducted into the idea of meme decay. Too much time online has made me sensitive to the ebbs and flows of internet memes, and by extension, the diffusive collective consciousness correlated with it. The way memes come and go, fall into and out of fashion, in a transitory, almost fluid motion, is representative of the state of the distributed attention span of millions of people all at once.

You might say I'm reading too far into stupid shit, but there is something of value to be gleaned from the analysis of these fleeting digital trends and the anti-symbolism, corrupted symbolism, they portray.

These disconnected, decontextualized, free-floating snippets of stunted expression are rapidly becoming the sole universal language. In the establishment of their primacy they also drag us into a reduced, fragmentary and fractured consciousness. Without attention, people are a short step away from animals. Attention is the deep lifeblood of human achievement, and thus the shattering of it by memes is an ill omen.

You're basically rewriting the theses of Baudrillard's later sociological studies. You should check him out, though be warned that his rhetoric is a little obnoxious.

What is a good city for getting into cultural or entertainment work?

I am doing STEM bugman work at the moment and it makes me want to kill myself. Ultimately I'd like to move somewhere with networks/circles/individuals that actually strive to do creative work. Somewhere there are other people like me trying to make it.

> mfw baked on hash first time this week
feels good. i don't get the point of getting stoned every day, it's not as comfy
how's your days bros?

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I'm not dumb enough or smart enough to be happy.

Trying to meet women through okcupid; most of them seem straight out of an assembly line. Meeting one that deviates from the mold causes a childlike wonderment in me, along with some reservation, since I know it'll take me hundreds of swipes to find another interesting girl in case things don't go forward.

That's just women desu, much flatter bell curve. They are mostly just average, exceptions are much rarer than a month men

Been a vegetarian for three years and am starting to have cravings for hamburgers again. Had a dream last night that I was trapped at a barbecue and forced to eat fries wings, they were really good. What does this mean?

Overt masculinity seems to be really compensating for actual masculinity. The people who go, "yeah bro I eat meat I've never even seen a vegetable oorah" and love guns and wear Punisher stickers and have those tacticool baby holders because having a baby is literally the gayest thing you can do as we all know. People who feel like they can't cry or show emotions other than ones related to anger without an excuse. Stuff like that. It's a bit of a caricature and a strawman but I feel like those men are caricatures themselves.

It's just weird to me as someone comfortable with my own manliness (now, as I will admit during my teenage years it was conflicting somewhat and I felt the need to posture) to see this stuff. The marketing too is just wow. Maybe it's all marketing, actually. Create a problem and then sell the solution to that problem. Baby carriers are gay. Here, have a MOLLE pouch bag in camouflage. Now you're not gay! Vegetables are gay. Here's the meat industry to sell you BEEF. I like guns. Older guns because I like the look. American gun culture is so overt and annoying. It's commodity fetishism, no? It's crafting an identity because of the lack of one and deriving a sense of you based on what you consume?

I don't know.

And your reaction to this is to build a Negation to this identity? Maybe you should relax and actually talk to people you disagree with for once

>The marketing too is just wow.
You're not on Tumblr, stop talking like a child

Get your b12 checked?

Will do

Dont know if i want to give up on life completly and be a NEET for the rest of my days.

Or if i want to actually try and go back to school and get a job...

hmmm, im kinda leaning towards the NEET option

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It's not to build anything. I'm just rambling. Would changing the sentence to, "the marketing is just unbelievable" make a difference? What does it matter? Wow. Unbelievable. Both express my distaste of it. How does that make it "tumblr"? Like. Omg. Wow. The marketing.

Pathetic

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:thinking:

>hits the bong
essentially any constructive process, be it the maintenance and growth of your body, the forging of a tool, cultivation of plants, or the generation of electricity, is possible because of the energy brought to the earth by sunlight. Even nuclear power is ultimately stellar in origin, those heavy elements were all created by supernovae. Geothermal energy comes from a combination of radioactive decay and residual heat from the accretion disk that was formed because of the sun.

the sun is based and we should worship it

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Ive had the week off, but tomorrow im going back to work. Actually looking forward to having something to do

This is how you know you're a boring American wage cuck

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Been making ambient and experimental music for years now, but I'm starting to get to a point where my songs have lyrics and are a bit poppy and catchy. I recently bought my first analog synth, having used MIDI keyboards and software before.
I really want to start performing live. I wanna get together a small little setlist that's about 5-10 minutes long and sign up for an open mic night. I'd bring my synth and use my laptop for drums. What do you guys think? Anyone have experience with stuff like this?

Not american but ok buddy. Ive been a neet for sometime now and work is actually one of the things i enjoy. Didnt think enjoying work was possible before

I did karaoke once with a friend at a bar. The bar is more metal/rock/hip-hop oriented, so people usually picked some modern songs to sing.

I picked the song "Can't Take My Eyes Off You" mimicking the scene from the movie "The Deer Hunter." No one actually liked the performance, but I enjoyed screaming my heart out during the refrain. Was a nice experience.

Worst case will be, you'll do bad and no one will give a shit, so I encourage you to do it.

I agree with you. I have some stuff to do and for the last 2 days I've been putting it off. I feel terrible, not because I haven't done it, but because I'm not doing anything. The whole passivity of the procrastination is getting to me, not that I'm running against deadlines or whatever. When I'm actually doing something, it means I'm motivated and more psychologically healthy.

A friend of mine literally just does covers of Spongebob songs on the ukulele so I feel okay with audience reception

Do it. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to leave. All the people around you stuck in this place considered at some point leaving through the army or other similarly radical means.
The hard part will be to join real life after the Army. Remember the army is just a way to get out of a situation, to reach something you want.
Good luck to you.

sounds cool desu

yep, when i have a week of work or something i think to myself "now im going to get things done" but heyheyhey i NEVER do things when i have time off work

I dreamt last night that I was a fighter pilot in some Battle of Britain-esque scenario. For some reason I had been separated from my squadron during an air raid, and was frantically driving through the city on my way back to the air field as enemy bombers flew overhead. I finally made it after being stuck in evacuating traffic for hours, only to find the field completely deserted and all the planes missing. Before I could investigate any further the phone in my pocket started buzzing. I pulled it out and discovered that all the other pilots had invited me to some kind of group chat in which they had been discussing squadron strategy. Reading through the messages, I realized that the lack of planes was due to the complete incompetence of my fellow pilots and the absence of any kind of leadership. One pilot left a message that he was feeling sick and didn't feel like showing up for the air raid, another claimed that flying was boring and didn't capture his interest anymore, and the last was bragging about stealing all the squadron's planes for himself and hiding them in his garage. I was horrified, but before I could do anything a bomb struck the field and I woke up.

I guess the moral of the story is that smartphone-addicted millennials can't into fighter planes.

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>American wagies

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>The hard part will be to join real life after the Army.
Trying this without the GI Bill and years of savings sounds much scarier than getting out. I'm just worried if I'll be too old for relationships and such

>I'm just worried if I'll be too old for relationships and such
Nah, you won't.
Lots of friends choose this road because of fucked up families. It is hard, but it gets better. Definitely if you compare with those who choose to stay.
I'll think of you mate.

Thanks man

One time after sex I told my ex girlfriend I was hungry and she laughed and I made a sandwich

it's not that bad, I went into the Air force, got out at 25 and went back to college. Having interesting life experiences from the military and being older actually helped me a lot with relationships.

I'm 24 now. Even when I'm having a good time with my friends, when I smile, it is the kind of rational smile you consciously put on your face as a reward for the things people say that you perceive as witty/funny/intelligent but have no particularly strong emotional recation to, like an distant observer watching birds on a field. At the same time, I have zero acting skills and a twitchy lip. It's safe to say that I have emotional problems. The main problem though, I believe, is my inabillity to become a stone faced killer. Because I feel obligated to smile, and because I have no emotional impuls to smile, I get myself into these awkward half-smiling half-dying inside situations. Maybe if I stop forcing myself to smile my situation will get better, even if I become That Guy at the party. I feel like my childhood full of laughs is giving birth to a stoic, crystal-faced man - in my mind, I picture an alien bursting out from inside a human male. I'm feeling pretty good about it.

The navy would still be risky, Iran actually has the capability to sink US ships unlike say, Iraq. Airforce would probably be OK

meow wolf

Get some peofessional help even if you don't think you need it or talk to your parents.

I've been seeing the same girl, who doesn't exist, in my dreams for the last 2 or 3 months, once or twice per week. I feel that we love each other more than me an my gf of 4 years ever have.

I hang out with basedboys and weebs and I'm kinda okay with that

I liked it! It's something I had never thought about.

I'm real; I exist. Not here and, true, not in the sense you have in mind. But out there, in reality, there's someone like me. Someone as I am. In that sense I'm real, and with that established let me tell you who I am. I'm someone that has only ever fallen in love with someone after it has become unfeasible for me to ever meet them again - it's because I love romance, I love the ideal; it's because I can't trust myself and will doubt always whether my love is true; the fact I doubt my own love is my proof that my love can't be the real deal, and that's what I am. But I'm more. I'm also somebody that was left behind on a decision I still haven't managed to make my mind up about, while everyone else made their choice and moved on in life. I'm in a career and yet I am not, I'm as much in my actual career as I am in my unactual ones, the ones I dabble in daily. I'm may appear to be here, but I have yet to decide whether this is where I want to be, or somewhere else. Around me I see only people who have chosen their way into their position. I'm not a phantom, but when I make my decision I will turn into one for one half of my life. So now you know, and perhaps you'll recognize me in the people around you from now on, or somewhere closer than that. Now I apologize, though, because I'm about to become someone different still. I'd rather be some people's phantom than nobody's true image, and I'd rather hold someone I like in my arms than think of someone I love in my dreams. By the time somebody, you, will even begin to read this the machine I typed this on will be unusable and all the romances and ideal therein turned to phantoms.

Bob stared at his PC and stopped to think. Whatever he thought then, he didn't deem it necessary to say it out loud. But it must have been something of importance, to him, because he did something he did not usually do. He got up from his chair, took his monitor, untook his monitor after remembering the many cords it is connected by, which he unhooked, upon which he retook his monitor, and flung it out of his gaping window. He did not stare after it in disbelief of his own actions but instead, gravely, got dressed for winter and moved out into the weather of just that. Snow plastered his face and a monitor on the ground nearly tripped him over, but no matter to Bob, for Bob was on a mission. He called somebody as he walked, appearing very cool and collected to any passerby had there been one at this time of the night, which there wasn't, and put his phone away again when nobody picked it up. He was more taken aback by the turn-down of his attempt at contact than his own actions leading up to his standing on the bad side of the railings of the volodarsky bridge. A handful of cars, in slow, low?, frequency drove past him, and Bob scoffed at the fact that none of them stopped. Would he have? Would you have? A mystery Bob demonstrated no interest in the answer to with a jump.

Can one of you help me to become a funeral director? How about it?

Instead of going to therapy I post in one of these every so often about a girl I hooked up with a party one time about 6 years ago and I pathetically think about every few months and spiral myself into a depression because I've had a girlfriend and other partners in the years since but never felt such an intense connection but i realize this is probably because i only had the one night with her so i've probably idealized her in my mind and that if i did pursue her further id probably slowly grow to resent her as i do anybody i've allowed myself to share my emotional life with

I fucked up and got into continental philosophy which led me nowhere. Now frantically trying to unlearn all of that bullshit and get into something objective. Any recommendations would be helpful

Obviously easier said than done, but quit it while you're ahead. If you have anger issues and a budding alcohol problem, that shit can lead you down some dark alleys and you can easily ruin your life in an instant. At the very least you'll probably make everyone you know hate you.

I'm sorry for your loss.

There is nothing for you to unlearn, for continental philosophy never taught you anything in the first place.

If you've got nothing else to do, check out the monk and priest philosophers

yeah

We did at one point

Christ I just want to be alone.

no u dont

Well not alone alone, but I want my own place to live.

why do people dislike simple people?

envy

America should be nuked until it's nothing but ash.

Theres this new song that ive been listening to and i quite like it

youtube.com/watch?v=ksRkjtduhtA

it makes me feel

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Reading Vico's New Science and it's fun

because people need to look down on a particular group, and simple folks tend to be an easy target. It really doesn't matter if your taste is basic or patrician at all, it's just a bunch of bullshit that they believe to make them feel better and superior about their inconsequential lives. What does matter is what you do with your time, what you offer to the world and to the people around you, what you're bringing to the real world. The rest is useless.

Songlyrics, and a dream that I had,

Spooks

I am balding. Bald people disgust me and look like hopeless thumbs.

other than fun, what is it like? what part are you in?

mattering is a question of meaning and not purpose. the sun "matters" and will surely outlives us all, but it's also a stupid ball of gas totally unaware of itself. human consciousness is sense appearing in the world.

>it's also a stupid ball of gas totally unaware of itself.
apologize.
stars are sentient

stars can kiss my conscious ass

le sad demiurge

They do regularly. They're parts of your farts too. #allmadeofstardust

Just realized that a lot of my neuroses come from having a very passive father, he's never really done... anything. Never moved from his home town, worked at his parent's company from 18 till now, never went to college, never did any athletics other than what was mandatory, no hobbies except Netflix and WoW. Now that I think about it, the hardest thing he's ever done is marrying a woman eight years older than him. How the hell can you become an independent adult with a role model like that? He tried being authoritarian with me a few times when I was a kid but it was completely laughable. I mean, I love him, but I don't really respect him. He hasn't left much for his children or made any long term plans but wants to lecture on the importance of social conservatism as he finishes his third glass of whiskey while watching Jordan Peterson videos at 2 AM in the living room. My mom is much more masculine than him, no wonder I had gender issues in high school

I've been wageslaving for 3 years now and I think I'm starting to become one of them. I can feel myself becoming more and more retarded every single day.

Reading Scott Alexander is making me an unironic monarchist. There are so many coordination problems that could be easily solved with a little bit of strong-arming: corruption, tax evasion, environmental code conformity, arms deprofliferation

i used to think im a monarchist
then i realized im really an integralist - things became much clearer

I lean more towards the platonic technocrat side than the falangist angle

Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts, that's why I feast on knowledge, like porridge, I bet you don't have enough storage in your brain to acknowledge, like a little rabbit you forage, but like a wolf I engage in carnage, I'll eat you, chew you up like meat too, defeat you, try to struggle but I'll beat you, try to act tough but you're see through, you might say that I'm mean but I have to come clean and spill my guts like spleen, i'm just letting off steam, this the cream of the crop, until I drop I won't stop until I reach the top, but even in down low I don't slow, flow like subterranean volcano, never take no for an answer, spread like a cancer, come back from the dead like a necromancer, hogtie the competition like a rancher, I've got more metaphors than a pimp has whores, when I rhyme you will never hear snores, there are more layers to it than a skyscraper has floors, this is just a throwaway I do this shit every day if you've got a problem then come my way. I'm here to stay, and yet somehow I keep it going, I'm a cold ass motherfucker it must be snowing

>tfw worried I have syphilis

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Do you have a Bandcamp/Soundcloud/Youtube that I can check out?

I want to eat more rice and fish but I'm too lazy to actually make the rice and fish. We had a rice cooker but it broke but I was often still too lazy. I make it in a pot now but I'm too lazy. GODDAMN IT. I'll make some in the morning.

Rice and fish is really the best. Would recommend some olive oil in the pot with the rice.

>Rice and fish

Rice and fish you said?
A great source of protein with a good portion of carbs?
Brother, you're starting a journey into a new lifte style, welcome to /fit/
First, let's see your actual body type.
If you have a high bodyfat level, i recomend starting with low impact cardio, best one is swimming, for sure, also try cycling, and once you have acceptable bodyfat levels, let's start with joggin'/running, rope jumping, etc.
If you want to build muscle mass, add to the diet some oats with squats, works like heaven.
SS is way to go, remember to feed those pull ups, don't want to end like those faggots who can't do even a proper pull up.

this made me comfy ty

what kind of cookies

i hope you and your family hang in there user

I saw ontologicool at the Vancouver Public Library today, she was wearing red. I was afraid she would somehow know I was Yea Forums if she caught me looking at her so I left.

Jesus, how old is your dad user? I feel like these are the kinds of dads that many zoomer children will have growing up. God we are so fucked.

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what the fuck

either you are handsome and attractive or comically ugly and disgusting.
which one is it user?

Why did you become a vegetarian?

Yeah, I may add that. I usually add butter like a burgoid.

What the fuck I just want to eat rice and fish

i personally can't, sorry.

what kind of balding?
if it's the kind where your hairline slowly recedes, the kind like jack nicholson in the shining, then it kind look kind of ok for a while.
if you're just losing hair on the top of your head, just kill yourself imho.

they were taking a selfie you autistic cunt

I'm quitting my job.

>too lazy to make rice in a pot
Nigga just put one cup of rice, 1.5 cup of water and let it cook for like 10 minutes. You barely have to do anything at all. I personally like to put a cardamom seed and a star anis while it cooks to give it a little flavour.

44 I think?

It's actually completely counterproductive debating things today, if your theory works just put it into practice and avoid everybody else. If they demand you explain yourself just pretend to be wooden headed and retarded. It saves you enormous hassle and keeps you out of the radar of people who want to fuck your shit up for violently rebuking their ugly unholy nonsense by fixing their broken systems of reasoning or adding to the lexicon of practical applications.

If you're lonely in the process well tough shit because trying to find comradery with people in your field if you've a completely different understanding of life to them is just asking for a shitshow lmao.

Really the actual solution to everybodies problems on here is just turn off the screen lmao, close your eyes, life's gonna move on whether or not you proved jack shit to this other retarded user only looking for a fight you're probably not at all different with the user you fought with desu.

Also most of you are retards who let websites consume your lives instead of using them for any real utilitarian purpose like they're supposed to be used for. Shit on boomers on facebook all you like but you're the same breed of cretin.

wow, your really an ass arent you?

OH MISTER JEFFRIES
OH THE SHIT, IT COME OUT OF MY ASS

i really want to put my penis inside a girl

What makes you say that?

inside what part of a girl?

mouth? vagina? anything desu

what about inside her belly button if she was fat enough?

Same

Me too.

Literally any part, as long as it doesn't pose a risk to my long-term health.

Yes.

@everyone
What does it mean when my English prof friend tells me "consider the audience" regarding my short stories? Every other critique makes sense, but this one doesn't. He couldn't really explain himself further when I asked for clarification, so I'm stuck thinking my writing is unaccessable (shit).

i really hate myself for placing any value on validation from other people. can i get over this?

so what can solve the problems?

actions

i would assume it means that either you aren't fully explaining the action or you let yourself get carried away on self-indulgent tangents.

not fat women, i forgot to clarify

if he can't elaborate on it, it's probably not advice worth following.

this

You're only giving up, if you don't do anything as a NEET. As long as you're doing something that fufills you, you are good to go,

seems like anyone browsing this board would do be like.

whoops sry mate thought you were on the path to greatness

going back to leechdom?

People who obsess over 'muh sincerity' and whatnot really are a thousand times more obnoxious than anything actually ironic or disingenuous.

>you let yourself get carried away on self-indulgent tangents
Probably this desu. Writing about a guy having a psychotic episode thinking that paradoxes are hiding the only truths God gave humanity tends to get esoteric pretty quickly, especially after throwing in a touch of Gnosticism.

how closely can I parallel a famous story before my own becomes unoriginal?

right now, im writing an isekkai and the main characters have a lot of similarities to dorothy, scarecrow, tin man and lion. on top of that there's a whole subplot that would have a wizard who is not what he seems. im even considering a villain getting hit by the train the mc rides in on

at one point am writing an adaptation instead of an original story?

Why?

t. someone who feels sincerity is dead and wishes things were different

Because eventually people start posturing and attach weird moralizations to the dichotomy, like thinking that being sincere is always wholesome and good and pure while irony and insincerity are absolute evils that need to be eradicated.
It's just silly.

I'm not saying there should be such a black/white distinction. But for pretty much all of recorded history (and this includes the history of literature ofc) sincerity was the norm and satire/comedy was its own niche. Look at the last few centuries. I'm not just talking great works, but letters of correspondence between friends, political dialogue, public discourse, etc. Nowadays everything is Poe's Law. I'm not saying irony is inherently bad, but it's clearly degrading our culture and taking away any chance people might have of finding meaning in this world. Maybe I'm projecting because I was born in a weird transitional period before the internet became what it is today, but I hate the modern culture of irony. It always has its place but when inflated into everything, then most things lose their meaning or can no longer be taken seriously, which is exactly the case today.

Got in an argument with a self described socialist co-worker
>Mentioned that someone is objectively attractive
>"Attraction isn't objective"
>There are features that are universally considered attractive across cultures like facial symmetry and clear skin
>"Are you saying that people are objectively wrong for being attracted to someone who doesn't have those"
>Only if they are exclusively, their attraction would be miscalibrated. All of those traits are signs of general health and evolutionary fitness
>"Fitness? Are you talking about fat people? Is this what it's about?"
It went on and I had to explain to them the difference between proscriptive and descriptive statements
>People can have sexual attractions that are dysgenic, pedophiles for example
>"Are you implying that having a different sexuality than yours is wrong"
>it's bad evolutionary to not be attracted to signs of health. You should have learned what survival of the fittest is in high school, it's basic evolution
>"I DON'T CARE ABOUT EVOLUTION" they yelled
>MFW
These people vote and don't understand a single thing about the world they live in

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how do you get out of your head enough to write? I spend so much time rueing over ideas and concepts that I end up not writing

Tristán Narvaja street, in Montevideo, Uruguay. There are literally 21 bookstores (used and new) in 3 blocks. I've bought first editions of Borges, T. S. Eliot, Neruda and some local authors spending a few bucks (for example, I bought a signed Neruda first edition with the equivalent of 10 USD).

That's pretty sick. Might have to stop by Uruguay and pick up some book

I've just started writing a short story about a dog that goes to hell. It sounds silly and I don't really know what I want from this, but it's the first time I actually wrote something in a long time. 2k words in and he still didn't go to hell, but I guess he's going to get there soon hehe.

make sure to insert a female dog named Beabitch.

It is rather difficult to follow a career path in modern times. The gist of the problem is the vast amount of information and possibilities that we have at hand - what can I do for me and this world? - I often ask myself that question. My mind is a riddle right now. I'm doing my best to discern what is my inner calling; however, It doesn't show up before me, and maybe It will never do. Well, whatever, I just need to keep striving toward knowledge and pursue something related to nature or art.

yeah, getting baked everyday is not that good. i did that for a year but it was in a time where i was feeling like shit, so weed would kinda make me less sad on the moment but on the long term it didn't help at all, just made me lazy and even more depressed. nowadays my life is way better and i only smoke on the weekneds.

It's kinda overrated, user. But if you really want just put some effort on Tinder and be persistent (and prepared to fuck a shallow 6/10 bitch.)

I'm sincerely worried that America is going to have a civil war in the next decade

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I hope it happens.

I don't think the anxious state exists in nature outside of the flight/fight response, unless an unnatural scenario is established.

>If you listen carefully, you can hear the jew talking to you
>can you hear him?
>he's saying "shhh... don't worry"
>nothing matters

I can't tell if I can only write when I'm hypomanic or if I can't write because I keep telling myself that

decade? bitch, it's less than two years away

Don't lose sleep over it. It's just another bewildered far right fever dream.

I have forgotten the pleasant aromas which accompany those who haven't forsaken normal life. When I try to imagine embracing a woman I can only inhale my own stale stench and no matter how beautiful the lady within my minds eye I shudder with repulsion and am shaken back to cold, lonesome reality. It must have been so nice, in the life which now clips through my head, the pretty movie which represents those days when I still attempted to fit into the world and even fooled myself and several others into believing I was one of them, it must have been so nice back then to feel the flesh of one other than myself and be drawn closer within their folds by the wonderful odor of their human soul. Did I ever even experience that moment? Or is everything I remember preceding this boring present just a desperate embellishment, automatically generated by my subconscious to preserve the little sanity I have left.

Nevermind. The feeling such fantastic musings generate is real enough. It makes me desire ice cream, served to me by a woman who nestles me against her breast and sits patiently as I take my time eating the vanilla scoop, savoring its coldness and it's ability to numb those corners of my mouth scorched by the bile regurgitated when I catch a wiff of myself

Do Air Force. Minimum contract is 4 years, which sucks ass, but it starts day one of basic training. I can answer answer questions you have if you’re still here. What do you want to know?

Air Force is a full fledged branch, it has its own department, etc. but it really is a support organization. If you’re sent overseas, your job is to check into the hotel, make sure the WiFi password words, make sure the troops land and have air support, then fuck off and play WoW.

I was initially 50/50 on either the Army or Air Force, so I see where you’re coming from.

This: Pic related is Tucker Carlson's response as to whether there will be a civil war. It won't happen, not in our generation at least.

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I need professional help to get over my executive dysfunction, but in order to do that I need to overcome my executive dysfunction to get a therapist

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I’ve begun writing something. It’s shit but I’m making it so I feel great.

Join the French Foreign Legion. It's way more lit.

>tfw it's been almost a year since I finished my last novel
>tfw I still have made no effort to publish it
>tfw I still don't have a first draft of the second one
>tfw it's only a little over a year until my goes under martial law

Give me one practical reason to buy physical books instead of reading them on my reader.

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My gf who works in administrative jobs said the exact same thing yesterday.

I got severe occupational burn-out and exhaustion due to a high stress, demanding job. It was fulfilling and I liked it but having this happen to me caused somewhat of an existential crisis. Been on medical leave for almost two months now.

My profession is an important part of my identity even though I told myself it wasn't. Now I don't know what I am anymore. I feel shame and guilt, yet it is also comfy to get away from it all.

The doctor said I should get physical activity, but I often feel so low-energy I can't. The lingering feeling of failure won't leave me though.

I still haven't decided if I want to keep on living.

Let's get this thoughts out of my head and my day started.

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I can't stop listening the spider pig joke song

You're an even bigger retard for mentioning evolution.

I'm enjoying Gravity's Rainbow, I feel like I have a general idea of the overall plot, but if you asked me what's going on page to page I don't think I could tell you. Certainly not my first Pynchon book, but Pynchon's Pynchonness is ramped all the way up in this one for sure.

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Yesterday I noticed that my baby betta fish was having some trouble swimming. I tested for ammonia, nitrate, nitrite, and pH levels in the water, and to my dismay, noticed that each one was exceptionally high. After dropping some stabilizer and primer in the water, I dashed off to work. I tried to keep on task at work but I was terribly worried about my little friend. After work I coach a youth football team, so I didn't get home untill 930PM. I changed part of the water in his tank, because I read online that a full water change could be too much of a shock to the little guy. I added more stabilizer and primer, practiced my script for an interview tomorrow, then hit the hay. I woke up about an hour ago and ate a breakfast sandwich. Then I walked over to the aquarium and saw him floating in the water. I've owned this fish for 2 months. I'm so so sorry my little friend. I'm so sorry I couldn't take care of you. You didn't deserve this fate. I wanted to foster a beautiful life and I ended up as the harbinger of death. My poor poor fish. Rest easy little guy. I love you.

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I am very sorry to hear that. I hope you and your family can stay strong for him and for one another.

Tell me where I went wrong

Gratz brah, you've got depression. Find out if it's caused by work or something else. If it's your work better get some good meds or start finding another menial occupation that won't decimate your health for another few years.

Sometimes you can do everything "right" and not get the result you want.

:( Sorry fishe did not like tank water. Maybe he come back as alpha fishe and own ocean

Travelers in my city should just stay in Tallaght.

im still on the fence about oz references, but can we talk for a minute about how the Wizard of Oz was basically a pre-emptive parody of isekai?

i mean, the wizard is fake, the entire quest is literally pointless, and the story starts off with the main character accidentally squishing the dark lord and looting her corpse in the first five minutes

>quit antidepressants because of side effects
>Feel more depressed off them
>MFW

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>The doctor said I should get physical activity, but I often feel so low-energy I can't.
You don't get it, it works the other way. You do physical activity in order to gain energy. You have to force yourself to do something that will raise your energy level, which in turn will motivate you to do more because when you're high energy you'll feel more like a human being is supposed to feel again.
t. knower

I have been swimming daily since 4 days and I must say it is kinda working. Will by a gym card tomorrow. I used to feel better when I was more fit and sported regularly. Fuck my job, my body and mind comes first now.

Japanese fantasy is so uninspired that pretty much any decently-written fantasy story can be read as a parody of it.

Would it not be that Ukiyo-e is Japan's canonical fantasy? And in that sense that their fantasy work is mostly paintings and drawings.

Are you implying there's something counter-intuitive to this?

what were the side effects?

Most Ukiyo-e paintings aren't fantastical in nature. That's not what I was talking about anyways.

You've been on the internet so long you spell travellers like an American, jackeen.

No, just revealing my own stupidity
I can't even remember, I was looking for an excuse to get off them, try something different

im talking about the western tradition rather than the japanese one, and the wizard of oz came out decades before some of the most famous examples, yet somehow managed to parody a whole genre before it was even established

Crap, thought it looked strange.

>Fuck my job, my body and mind comes first now.
Good choice, user.
It may not be for everyone, but I personally recommend martial arts. I don't mean some gay "self defense" thing or some ancient Asian magic bullshit, but a proper fight gym, something like Kickboxing or Muay Thai (almost the same thing), or MMA.
To me there's no physical activity more satisfying than fight training, both short and long term. Of course you need to find a good gym to have a good experience.

army is all niggers, go for the chair force if you want a good life, or the marine corps if you like abuse.

Stuck on work now, don't really need a job or the money, but i can't quit for the next 6 months. God i just wish i was a NEET playing games and reading all day long.

Don't want to open a thread for this.

To the Anons who told me to read Berlin Alexanderplatz when I asked about it (it was like a month ago), I want to say thank you. It's fantastic. I will definitely reread it in the future.

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Doblin's other books have been translated into English by a fan and are freely available online, you should check them out.
beyond-alexanderplatz.com/
I haven't actually read anything by him, but some user was shilling this site not too long ago and the synopses of some of the stories (particularly Wallenstein and Amazonas) seemed really interesting.
What makes Berlin Alexanderplatz so great, in your opinion? It's his most famous book so I figure I should start there before diving into the more obscure and esoteric stuff.

Sounds pretty interesting desu

If someone were to sit down and write a mix of everything he's familiar with (without any dissonance) on 500 pages, it would end up being on the level of Berlin Alexanderplatz.

I wrote some bigger explanation, mentioning examples, but yeah, it's that. The style, the atmosphere, the characters, the place, the story, the philosophy, the message are harmonically depressive.

Guys whats the worst board on this hellhole?

Yea Forums

The worst thing is that they are all equally bad. It's always the same kind of shit. Nothing stands out. People are buying into the Yea Forums culture while at the same time they criticize normies for buying into consumerism or other things.

ignoring the obvious trashfire hellholes like /trash/, Yea Forums, /bant/ and whatever the fuck else there is these days, as well as /mlp/, /lbgt/ and the like, the general rule is that the higher the traffic, the worse the board. so Yea Forums, /pol/, Yea Forums are some of the worst.

I've never met any in person who cares about the things I do, and shares my values. I can't talk to anyone about anything serious or sincere without them radically misunderstanding me. I'm so God damn lonely. The only time I've felt any sense of community is on this board.

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The only thing that bugged me was when people didn't assume that I've heard an argument before, but that stopped once I made peace with the thought that people have an one-dimensional picture of me that they're not willing to change.

So I do my thinking alone (God knows they're not some deep thoughts) and I share them once I find out that the other person has done the same amount of reading as me, because I've realized that you can't avoid reading if you want to reform your opinions.

thank you so much for the support.

I did karate wado-ryu from 6-16. My father was national champion and he egged me on. Never liked the repetitiveness of it. Then again I might appreciate it more as an adult.

I've been having several oddly animal and nature themed dreams recently.

In this one I was at my childhood home and the backyard had been taken over by wild boars. I remember that in elementary school this one Polynesian immigrant girl had serious facial disfigurements from getting charged by a boar and it always left an impression on me.

Anyway, so these wild boars are rampaging through my backyard, taking complete ownership of it, and generally just trashing the place in search of food. My mother is scared, and it's left to my dad and I to handle the situation. I suggest finding the rifle, but this isn't where my dad stored his rifle so we were fucked. Then it occurred to my mom to call animal control, which left me seriously disappointed as I wanted to slay the beasties.

In another dream I was hiking in Alaska with some random woman and we were pursued by three (three) whole grizzly bears. We forded a river to get some distance and rested on an outcropping. The bears were encircling us. At this time the woman had died from hypothermia, and it dawned on me that if I chopped her into bits and threw it into the river the bears might take the bait. But when I pulled out my knife to do this desperate, dirty work, she suddenly turned into a plastic barbie doll and I found myself tearing at plastic limbs, foiled and shit out of luck.

I'd love to read that. Please post it when it's done.

Are you from Brazil, user? I can be your friend.

Traditional martial arts are something of a different thing from modern combat sports ones. The latter also typically include intense full-body workouts and lots of endurance/cardio on top of drilling technique and actual fighting/sparring. I think there's less repetitiveness in a way, although of course you do have to repeat things endlessly to get good at them.

I'll probably post on the critique thread friday or saturday.

America

I recently spoke with a Chinese professor of polish language, he has been studying polish for 20 years and he made 6 mistakes in the span of 5 minutes, I couldn't bare his accent and just ended the conversation.
You will never learn polish, it's just too hard.

Wizard of oz is psychoanalysis for kids.

I did it. I finally did it. Please God don't let me fuck this up.

Not that original poster, but I was actually thinking about it and contacted a former Legionare over facebook (found interview he did on youtube) and asked him a bunch of questions.

The thing is you are probably a lot better off joining your normal army, than going into that kind of shit. People from 3rd world countries come to join, because that's the only way they can escape, which results in a lot of brain dead meat shield force and I doubt you want to be stuck with some Nigerian in a combat zone that would fuck shit up in the end and cause even more deaths. I think it's still something to try out if you are young, since it's the only institution and the reputation you have after 5 year contract is something people look up to usually (unless they have you in the image of blood thirsty killer). I still think it's vastly over romanticized and if you don't end up in some good unit, it's gonna probably suck really bad, while you suck NCOs dicks all day. Not to mention the beatings and some even say raping, etc.. I still haven't made my mind up, but you get where I'm going with it.

Today i learned that cats have barbed penises that not only cause females pain, but also tear their vagina. Its why cats howl like maniacs during intercourse.

i´m learning krav maga and studying black magick so that i can stop being such a timid introverted guy, so that i can shit on normies whenever they want to mess with me, feel free to call me an edgelord, i don´t care

also i want to develop a personality like pic related, sarcastic type, doesn´t give a shit about everybody thinks of him, only cares about the craft and the arts, takes every normie he encounters as a joke

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I smoke everyday and everynight, I work part time in the afternoon when I'm sober. The people at work are my only human interactions. I can't do anything with my spare time except worry, play guitar, scribble, watch shit, read articles about things that do not concern me at all, discuss shit online, all pretty baked. I'm able to sustain myself, but have no savings. I've been doing this for almost 3 years. I can't get out.

I can't even take pride in the fact that I wrote a novel anymore. all I can focus on is how much trouble Im having repeating it

Fuck, I'm really sorry user. I hope it eventually gets better and that you find peace.

what's your current situation and what do you plan to do?

when i accepted my parents for who they are i became free. i also found a new appreciation for them that i was entirely closed off from. it took around 23/24 years for this but these last couple of years i've never been closer to them (particularly my dad). it definitely has something to do with a childish perspective where you're putting them on a pedastal. i hope you experience the freedom some day.

...

The way out.

you can get out bro, you just have to start heading in that direction. you'll fail again and again but you'll get there. the main thing that keeps me from going back to every day smoking is the delusion i was under while doing it. life has a much deeper meaning now i smoke every now and then (i buy a gram every few months) - those feelings while stoned are passing and forgetting. life is worth looking at, at face value. clear and sober.

I wish I could become a government leech

My dog started dying a week ago and he's coming to the end of a drawn out intestinal infection now. He's been a good companion for the past decade through my major formative years.
The news about the train aspy burning over 30 of the KyoAni people to death puts things pleasantly in perspective for me however. Is this a form of catharsis? Dozens of individuals brutally perish, some are left with horrific burns, hundreds of family members and friends are thrown in to grief - all because an autist was enflamed against them for popularizing his favourite trainspotting location. And how many dogs have lived and died decade by decade since mankind vassalized them?
This is all stoic cope though, I'm sad.

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today hurt anons. nothing bad happened to me, but the sheer oppressive banality of my daily existence just crashed down on me like a mountainous wave. it feels like my heart could give out.

bump

after a couple miserable years of being completely single I have been suddenly filled with lust for this plain, awkward, virgin 5/10 friend of mine who I really didn't think I was attracted to or wanted anything much to do with.
never experienced it before, what is the meaning of this?

:(

iktfb

Why are so many things I love being snuffed out

checked
also that's pretty epic

Maybe you're single for so long, and in a miserable way, you started seeing him/her as a solution for that.

Why would nature do something like this?

I see all my friends have fun with their family and close friends while they are away from uni for summer vacatione and it only makes me bitter cause i have a fucked up family life and zero super close friends in my hometown. Is it so bad that i yearn and am a bit jealous of something i don't have due to unlucky circumstances? Im a sad and pathetic fucker. I just want to have fun as well

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but I don't want a romantic relationship with her, I just want to fuck her. it wouldn't be any kind of solution for what I really want.

To be honest I don't wish true thought freedom to anyone. To have no anxieties is to have.... nothing. To live for nothing and to feel nothing, because fear is the only one true feeling aside from love, but love can't come first unlike fear.
I think the society of man has killed the animal in us. Is it a great thing? Sure, I'm not some contrarian pseud who pretends modern society isn't living on the easiest difficulty. You can practically live your entire life without leaving your room, ponder on that.
But at the same time I can't shake this call that's drumming in the deepest reaches of my soul. I think it's that part that wasn't killed, merely suppressed. Many people can't, and many still won't acknowledge it.

If another wave of melancholy hits me anytime soon, I'm pretty sure I'll end up dead somewhere deep in the wilderness. Man truly isn't meant to be a solitary animal.

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Thanks for the words user, really appreciate it.

And you're right that I can get out. But truth is I don't want it. But I kind of want it. But actually all I want is to stay here smoking my weed day after day, except I know this won't lead me any place that I want to be. I get very anxious outside. I just feel stuck. It's something I love to do that I'll have to give up. I know I don't even have to give up entirely or anything, but I'm so in a loop that even a day without this for whatever reason makes me absolutely tired. I don't know what to do.

Lit is pretty bad it's just shit posting stupid shit but with a literary twist, since people just pretend to read. if this was a real literary board there should be way more variation in the books discussed. It's more of a shitty philosophy board that postures complete bullshit 60 percent of the time which in honestly isnt that bad but its also summer.

At least you have friends to begin with, I had one (1) good friend from my hometown but he stopped talking to me a while back (read: last October). Since then I've had literally zero social interaction and I can't do shit about it because my town is too small to have meetup groups or clubs or whatever people insist is the key to making friends. I need to move out but I need a new job first.

If you happen to be my missing friend by chance: text me, bitch. I'll come visit you.

I'm tired of this feces existence

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/s/ is such an inexplicably weird place. It’s the only porn board I feel uncomfortable posting on.

Nature is awful retard

I'm becoming physically dependent on alcohol. Woke up this morning hyper-aware and extremely anxious. I was drunk last night and I saw a girl I used to go out with, she shouted in my face that I was "toxic and extremely difficult to love."

It means you do not habe self respect. Ugly people do not deserve to be loved. They deserve to be mocked and insulted by the handsome until they kill themselves.

Chad debaters use moralistic arguments.
Virgin debaters use pragmatic arguments.

mabye