Wait at train station

>wait at train station
>train has 35min delay
>see cute girl (probably 16-18)
>she walks up to me and asks if her train already passed
>I immediately fall in love
>I tell her no
>She walks away
>I keep looking at her, while waiting for the train
>I tell myself that I need to stop staring at her. because she'll think I'm creepy
>I watch at the clock in the opposite direction and tell myself I'll wait 1 minute until I look at her again
>1 minute is over and I look in her direction again
>She's gone
>I will probably forget her face in a couple of days, it's already blurry now.

Books for these feelings pls.

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Imagine living some place where you have a train to take you places. That's a luxury for a daily commute. Try living somewhere without busses, without public transport.

>living in a crime ridden melting pot city is luxurious because you can commute by train
Give me a shack on a farm an hour from anywhere, anyday. At least I can have my thoughts without BEEEP HONK HONK ZOOOOOM! WEEE WOO WEEE WOO WEEE WOO.

There are places where you can commute by train, that aren't infested with criminals.
Luckily, I live in one of those.

The beauties by Chehov

Sounds good, thanks.

Nice.
ibiblio.org/eldritch/ac/beauties.htm

Why does such beauty make one feel so sad/melancholic?

Probably because you see it only for a bit passing by and moving on never seeing it again, it's bound to be melancholic.

I used to be tortured by those moments as well but then I took the incel blackpill and lost all hope

Yeah, that kinda ruined it for me as well.
Now, there's always this thought back in my head, that tells me that maybe she likes to get fucked by black dudes and then I lose all interest.

That still seems on the absurd side to me, although when I see a girl within 10 metres of a black guy, I instinctively jokingly think, "OH MY GOD, she wants the BBC, /pol/ will be PISSED!"

It's the thought of every girl on tinder with 50 chads on tap that makes it all seem futile to me.

Fuuuck. I'm trying to untrain myself from these thoughts, but it's not easy.
It gets even harder once you get to know those girls, since it turns out true most of the time.

my beautiful dark twisted fantasy - eliot rodger

Why untrain yourself from the truth?

I walk for several hours a day and I enjoy it immensely more than “commuting”

Almost this exact scenario happens in In Search of Lost Time. Reading a 3000 page book for a single ~2 page scene probably isn't a great idea though

Trains are honestly shit unless you live in countries with maglev trains

Kanye West*

doesn't help that I don't have a HUGE penis

Force myself to an illusion, so that I don't kill myself, I guess.

Autists tend to have trouble with loud noises

Tell me how the noises sound like user

>(probably 16-18)

Your story is very beautiful OP, it reminds me of this song, for some reason:
youtube.com/watch?v=M2dPYRhSb4c

I have had similar experiences, where the heart glows and flutters at the sight of someone who, as quickly as they are revealed to our grasping bodies, are snatched away by the clouds of possibility. To think that, perhaps, she had waited for you to look - and when you didn't look again she thought less of the situation and left - is almost unbearable.

Legal in my country and I'm only 21.
Also, it doesn't matter, because beauty is beauty and women are objectively beautiful at that age.

Nice song.

>To think that, perhaps, she had waited for you to look - and when you didn't look again she thought less of the situation and left - is almost unbearable.
Oh god, don't make me imagine that.

Is that 30th street station?

Nope, it's Karlsruhe Hbf.

I’m not reading your blogpost, faggot. s,h&r’d

I knew you guys are out of touch with reality, but this is beyond my understanding.

Soulless retard

Trains are GOAT compared to other kinds of public transportation. Chill, comfy and you can read without problems, unlike in buses.

If you stop fapping it gets easier. It's almost been 4 weeks since I fapped and I feel better.

W-wait, how true is this, user?? Maybe that's the problem.

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And some of them find it comfortable.

i dropped acid and analysed my thought patterns by writing stuff down. I recommend it if you feel your thought patterns are not helpful. Also read Buddhist literature to guide you.
I always think, would my crush/god or whoever would be disgusted with these thoughts
good luck user :)

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