Write what's on your mind

came for memes and got the feels :(.

even the pic looks depressing

Attached: 181B6025-10F2-4A2A-811A-1D14C83CB606.jpg (601x508, 31K)

t. 31

>tfw actually gaining traction as a songwriter and musician
>tfw I really want to be a fiction writer
Should I give up on my literary ambitions and just stick to what I do best?

Yes
You can make real money and support yourself with music. The same cannot be said with literature.

I want to die.

Peace Corps as means to sort out life: Yea or nay

Is the distance between the self and art getting lost?
Everything needs to be "immersive" nowdays with movies and videogames and music. Every possible sense is assalted with input.
Why is this? Is this a good thing? I can't tell.

Attached: D6472E3A-DCE6-4BC6-A256-49C9A89AFAA6.jpg (614x762, 99K)

Hattrick

>Why is this?
Americans ruining everything with their autistic "muh technology muh society muh change muh progress muh improvement muh multiculturalism muh competition muh western civilization" singsong
>Is this a good thing?
No.

Arguably its tied up with the post-9/11 climate. I'm not one of those "9/11 was the greatest work of art" people, but I do think it showed how art in the 21st century cannot simply be static, symbolic or representational, but rather that in order for it to 'mean' something it has to go beyond representation, it has to realise the remainder of the real that violently punches through the distance between spectacle and spectator. So much space has been artificially imposed between them that it takes something truly horrifying to collapse the distance.

> but I do think it showed how art in the 21st century cannot simply be static, symbolic or representational, but rather that in order for it to 'mean' something it has to go beyond representation, it has to realise the remainder of the real that violently punches through the distance between spectacle and spectator. So much space has been artificially imposed between them that it takes something truly horrifying to collapse the distance
Great mumble jumble, buddy

How do i off myself but make it look like an accident

Intentional car accident.

Worked for Patrick Star

why would it matter if it looked like an accident or not. your not concious

Ignorance is not an intellectual position, you cretin. You asked a question about art theory, I gave you an answer that relied on said terminology. It isn't my fault if you're too stupid to understand.

Great art is not different from what it was 100 years ago, 1000 years ago or 10000 years ago. Taking edgy intellectual positions do not change the value of your work; it most probably diminishes it.

Do you mean the spongebob patrick star or patrick starrr

I wasn’t putting forward an “edgy intellectual position”, I was arguing that events like 9/11 irrevocably changed the zeitgeist to such an extent that art lost its effectiveness at making us feel something. Films like Velvet Buzzsaw which explore the vacuousness of the art world is a perfect demonstration of this. I don’t know why you think art exists in a vacuum because it most certainly doesn’t - the criteria of what is ‘great’ art has to adapt to the new cultural climate. If art (in its most basic definition) is a reflection or aesthetization of life, shouldn’t the objects it purports to represent change as time goes on? And shouldn’t our methods of criticism change also to suit these new objects of enquiry?

Fund me and I will run for president

Tom Clancy is great for details but GOD DAMN does he suck at making interesting characters. I quite literally had to force myself into continuing to read until I could no longer bear it and had to drop the Hunt for Red October. Hell the movie was a hundred percent better than it! At the very least Red Storm Rising is far more interesting, but, again, the characters are simply forgettable.

Attached: file.png (800x1075, 1.01M)

>events like 9/11 irrevocably changed the zeitgeist
Probably in murrica, lmao. Europe experienced that same shit 60 years before muh twin towers.

> the criteria of what is ‘great’ art has to adapt to the new cultural climate
What a retard.

I'm so tired.

FYI, I'm british, so if I was going to talk about something closer to home I'd mention the 7/7 london bombings. But I didn't, primarily there has been so much criticism published in the last couple decades on post-9/11 art. if you are at all engaged in the contemporary art world you'd certainly have had this discussion before, but considering how stubbornly dated your opinions are, I'd assume otherwise.

>What a retard.
Use your words faggot, prove me why I'm wrong and your antiquated conception of aesthetic value is right. I'm waiting.

Gonna talk to a doctor soon about my perpetually disrupted sleep patterns and mood swings/brain fog. Wouldn't it be wonderful if all of my personality problems could be attributed to simple lack of sleep and it could all go away?

I am a total psued. I am not good at anything. I say this because I wish to be honest with myself. I am a mediocre writer. I take pleasure in reading about history, cultures, geopolitics, literature, and philosophy. I am not sophisticated in any of them.

I’m thinking of becoming a teacher. These are my interests and reasons for living, and even if I’m a psued, at least I can use my knowledge to help high schoolers who want to learn. I don’t know.

Attached: EF9273D5-4B13-44D7-946B-B0658D366457.jpg (240x210, 8K)

vid is funniest I’ve seen this year
how did he get away with it
youtu.be/mNCwJeiZfvk

>if you are at all engaged in the contemporary art world
I am, but 99% of what is being said in any academic field today is Cambrige-tier mumble jumble bullshit.

>use your words
I don't waste my time. Kys.

hey I'm not and I appreciate your answer. It makes sense.
The space spectacle and spectator is almost non-existent with thing like VR, 4D cinemas and whatnot, and this space has been broken with violence. I do disagree with the 9/11 thing, though, adjectives like "immersive" and "engaging" were being used to describe art before that.

>The space spectacle and spectator is almost non-existent with thing like VR
I've had a few experiences at my uni where they tried to use VR to show you just how fucked up an abattoir is, but it doesn't really move me to veganism (though I would like to try for the health benefits).

I am not saying that immersive art hasn't ever existed prior to 9/11, but as a catastrophic event, it forces us to recontextualise the kind of immersion that art should strive for in order to break us out of our absurd inertia.

Had a dream where I was watching a movie in which emperor Augustus was a pseudo-vampire with a cabal of sorceres who is trying to attain immortality. He was transforming people who displeased him into rotten monstrosities as a way to feed a ton of rats being raised by the sorcerers. The strangest part was his clear ceticism and atheism, since they were clearly practicing magical feats. I blame the strange dream on my brother, who kept waking me up from hour to hour.

>I don't waste my time.
Suit yourself. I assumed discussion was the point of this thread but apparently you're neither willing nor competent enough.

I just woke up so I didn't mean to copy the other "had a dream" guy but
Had a dream where I lost my pet cat and walked around town looking for him. Went into an animal shop and they showed me all their lost animals. One of the animals was my dead guinea pig I had when I was 14 and in that moment, I gave up looking for that cat just so I could experience a day with that guinea pig. It was so nice seeing him run around happily and squeaking with joy instead of his final days of bumbling in confusion with a heavy fever. I held that guinea pig close to me one last time and told it I loved it and how much I missed it. desu I'm crying while writing this
Then my cat in real life bounced onto my bed and woke me up so I could feed him.

Attached: ss.jpg (1300x821, 101K)

>I just woke up so I didn't mean to copy the other "had a dream" guy
No harm done, I had the idea of writing about my dream after reading a previous post mentioning dreams.

Sorry for your sorrow, things barely started and it already feels as if today is gonna be a day of unrest. Kind excited to be honest, it’s better than ennui. Unrest provides change, and I’ve been craving it for some time.

My daydreams of a relationship with a girl I never dared to approach because of anxiety and psychosis are coming on strong again as of late. Still naive romantic scenarios along with transposed ones where the girl has issues I imagine my mother had before divorce which I try to resolve in my dreams.

What kind of idiot takes his interpretation of his parents' relationship as an unconscious model later in life worsening his neurosis when falling for girls, right?

>What kind of idiot takes his interpretation of his parents' relationship as an unconscious model later in life
I think everyone does this 2bH

This is generally why its a bad idea to be your own analyst. The only reason Freud's theories are discredited today is because they were true to his own neuroses, he didn't uncover any unconscious except for his own. That process of self-identification is more of an entrapment in oedpial logic than it is a way of coming to terms with it. The pertinent thing would be to see that you're not really using your parents relationship as a model, but rather displacing your current anxieties surrounding this girl with the failures of your parents, thus reproducing their failure before you've even made the attempt.

Recommend me a good with themes of ascetism/repaying for commited sins that isn't by Dostojewski.

The More I read the more it becomes necessary to unlearn...

Essentially The act of reading is negation of the self.

Attached: Five_Easy_004-550w.jpg (550x298, 103K)

I'm just a weirdo.
Gosh, I look normal, dress decently, don't smell weird or talk funny and definitely I'm not a moron ...
I simply laugh at inappropriate stuff, check out girls too much and I'm not too friendly of a guy (still polite tho).
People don't stick around and I'm not very prone to keep in contact...
It wouldn't be that bad if they weren't so in the face when talking about my weird ways.
Girls too aren't any better.
It feels like such a waste, being looked down on, not being part of social life.
Not having a girlfriend at my age.

Attached: eb9e15f0-49fb-0133-6d2a-0aecee5a8273.jpg (540x540, 95K)

I wish I had a best friend and we would just hang out, drink and hit on girls and maybe have the occasional brawl every now and then.
Maybe I'll write a book about that some day.

Attached: Rebel-without-a-Cause-1.jpg (1000x795, 398K)

Looking in the mirror - discounting the times during panic attacks and times of suicidal dejection - must have increased my narcissism even as I cripple under social anxiety. The narcissism sits along deep anxieties in ways I still don't understand. Maybe it's like how paranoia can become a defense mechanism to avoid facing the void that actually no-one is looking at you, to avoid the reality that you are really isolated.

Hopefully recent Yea Forums books added to my reading list will help.

Attached: 1552276558441.png (500x372, 108K)

I am here.
Let's join a jiu jitsu class together so we can hit girls.

>The pertinent thing would be to see that you're not really using your parents relationship as a model, but rather displacing your current anxieties surrounding this girl with the failures of your parents, thus reproducing their failure before you've even made the attempt.

Hmm, I used to see the look of my mother in that of certain women, fearing I would disappoint them as I felt my mother got disappointed; basically feeling like I couldn't be the man needed to satisfy the woman for a lifetime. You're right I moved my anxieties about my masculinity into my interpretation of my parents' relationship. And yes, not trying has of course meant failing by default.

Orthodoxy is the only fate I accept as my own.
There is something so familiar about it, the genuine people, the traditions.
It feels like home.

Attached: ryzhenkov_pavel_viktorovich_28_monks.jpg (800x1614, 703K)

I had flashbacks of a time, the darkest time of my life.
When I posted on r9k and would act in the most despicable ways.
The lowest state I reached was masturbating to trap doujin.
I had erased it, and it has been years since..
The mere thought of being such a low piece of shit, degenerate, human waste once gave me a fit of angst.
I'm in a better place now but this won't go away, remorse will follow me to the grave.
My only fault was being young and immature.
Writing it down is therapeutic.

Remorse is a pitiless fellow.

Attached: download.jpg (194x259, 8K)

That doujin is lit

I mean it feels like home but home is not where reality goes all shifted

I recently read Gogol's Tsaras Bulba. It was a very good read. How he described the fraternity of the Cossacks, his love for religion even if it was just chauvinism and their love for life and death made me really sad about the "neutral" experience that should be called life. Maybe you'll like it too. Duno

What does one develop by reading? Only vocabulary?

Don't trust anyone.

How to stop being a pathetic sadboy?

Men are untrustworthy.
The world would be a better place if women ran the judicial system and could decide who's allowed to live or die.

>The world would be a better place if women ran the judicial system and could decide who's allowed to live or die.
jesus this would be bad
women dont understand the concept of evidence, they start crying if you ask them to prove that someone did whatever they're accusing them of

>man is caught being misogynistic during a recital of the vagina monologues
>sentenced to death

Yes, that’s a great idea

Attached: 590771E7-82D4-4402-A5D7-F50CEA984E30.jpg (173x163, 7K)

Yes but it's male judges who fall victim to women with crocodile tears during rape allegations.
I'm glad you agree.

>I agree
Hahahaahahaha.

We need to reteach you all how to think about reality. It’s not a competition of genders, or races, and it certainly isn’t sustainable (ie replicable) past a certain point in time.

Starting to realize all of the work I've doing on spiritual, philosophical and intellectual matters has alienated me from friends and family. I don't know what to do about this.

So you makes others feel stupid?

Other way. When I try to talk to people, it's hard not to see them as incredibly stupid. Or I guess as anti-intellectuals to be nicer.

my face is itchy and i need to take a shit

Insert your dick into everything they consume secretely (while they are away from home, at night, etc) then call them up and tell them that there is a little bit of you in all of them.

They will be tremendously satisfied (because at this point they had already suspected this for sure) and then they will thank you for the addition you’ve made

>it's hard not to see them as incredibly stupid

yes user, everybody is stupid except you.

To the user in the other thread who had the insight as to distancing oneself from oneself as a means of erotically attaining love,
I wanted to insert a possible link I've noticed while thinking on it a couple days.
This strategy necessarily devalues the present self, or the present reality.
This devaluement must then place the value somewhere else -- in the past, I'd think.
But that's completely illogical. I can see why it could be believed... eroticised... I've believed it for so many years. But I think that eventually, you can truly know enough to re-apply your subjective logic to this distancing, this splitting, and maybe even re-assign value to the present once again. Even the shitty feels that arise as a result of having believed this for so long aren't logically enough to justify the disownment of the present, if you know enough to see through that fairly cheaply manufactured belief.

What else is there to do but love?
What higher calling is there to unconditionally your fellow man?
I've struggled for finding a purpose for my life.
I created a story, a projection, of the kind of man I wanted to be.
A soldier, an intellectual, someone wealthy.
All come and go, these stories, these narratives.
But when I feel a deep love for the stranger walking past me on the street,
what an ecstasy, what bliss...
I dont mean the selfish kind of love
I mean the kind of love that accepts people for who they are
Wherever I end up in life, I know that the greatest satisfaction i can get
is to love and care for people, for life
to become involved
I've closed myself off before...

But to love! What else is there to do but love?
to love people, to love life, to love passion
it doesnt matter which

when you reach the Void of your own existence
what will you fill it with?
love or fear?

Attached: 1552325678370.jpg (600x842, 45K)

there's a time limit to knowing, but you know it already, so you fear the time limit knowing you won't know it but knowing that you know it.

ignoring it currently. there's no way of going back but i'm starting to think that's a blessing. starting to see what a fucking loser i was. i still am a fucking loser but i'm self-aware enough to shut myself away so as not to impose all this nonsense on other people.

it's too late for literally anything to matter.

>What else is there to do but love?

nothing

if you're not loved, then when are you?

Attached: __reki_haibane_renmei_drawn_by_torisoboro__b421a9ee2731ff2db7d3b63f1695a0d8.jpg (906x723, 185K)

No, I mean they refuse to acknowledge the shittiness of their lives and give me only advice to make mine go the way theirs does. Any time they want to talk, it is never anything worthwhile but boring bullshit going on in their lives. Do I just accept they are a bunch of normies and start pushing them out of my life, which is kind of what I want to do.

Spent the entire weekend trying to remember the 3 digit security code on the back of a money card that still had money on it but which I can't find anywhere. Computers don't save that number apparently. Racked my brains so hard I even ended up dreaming about this fucking number.
713. It was 713. I remembered it. Ah, what a feeling. Like finally sneezing.

The end is nigh. I've been sleeping way less during the night, but make up for it by sleeping during the day. I've been smoking like a chimney, but the taste stays in my mouth too long. It's bothersome. My homework is getting done later and later, and now not at all. I've stopped reading, as it is a waste of time for a pseud like me. Instead, I watch hours and hours of t.v. and eat. At least I'm watching it all from a 3rd person pov

Attached: spoopy.png (1066x737, 1.25M)

I want to be angry and demand an answer for why my life is like it is, as if I were owed an answer, but I know exactly why it is this way. I know it's all my own doing, but I'm tired of hating myself, I just don't have the energy for that anymore. Nothing is gained by it either, or self-pity for that matter. And I've gone through the "I don't actually matter" phase, but that's not the end of it. Anyone created does matter, by virtue of being created. What doesn't matter is our desires. What we think we want for ourselves will not help us, they never could. We are called to abandon all of that and love and expect nothing in return, to love for the other's good and no thought for our own. I believe this, or at least hope I do, I certainly understand it now.

But love needs an object, or it's only a pretension. How can you love someone who refuses to receive it? Or how do you reconcile with someone who has wronged you and refuses to accept your forgiveness? Or at least how do I get over my anger, jealousy, and envy? That shit's going to kill me.

I never said anything about being loved. Give love without the expectation of reciprocity.

i fap to trap doujins everyday

Attached: 9ff.png (550x535, 198K)

Are you in the UK lad? What are your thoughts on cottaging?

I wish I was removed from everything, but I realize my desire to be entertained; and those who even give up their time to living in the woods also must entertain themselves.

I suppose monasticism is the true path.

I'm realizing that writing doesn't make me happy, it just fills me with constant angst and despair.

And yet, despite that, I can't imagine living without it. It's been my goal for so long and all it does is make me unhappy

I wish I were a rapper but I can't rap.
And I wish I had a toilet 'cause I can't crap.
Once I watched a ball python eat a small rat.
And I used to own 3 kittens and a mom cat.

Yeah, I wish I had a 'cycle, I would zoom zoom.
And a car with a sound sys that boom boom
I never buy my undies from Fruit & Loom
When I was an emo I would say "doom"

i don't necessarily fear death but every night when i go to sleep i have constant anxiety about my loved ones being taken away from me too early. i don't know when this started but it's painful and im struggling to cope. i don't ever think about death or people dying until i lay down for bed and I'm alone in the dark. visions of the people i care about dying just appear in my head unwillingly. i lost my last grandfather and my uncle recently, neither of which I thought affected me all that much but now I think it's started this night time panic I experience every night. i just want to sleep.

on an unrelated note, do you eu anons ever get tired of seeing american politics everywhere on the internet? im american and im sick of it. it's quite polarizing. i can't imagine how annoying it must be for europeans who couldn't give less of a fuck.

Why aren't there more societies that just exist in constant snow? Like Russia but happy. That's my dream. I want to live in a happy little snow society full of pretty fluorescent lights that would glitter and glow through the snow. I would eat egg noodle soup each night with a cup of tea with honey. Life would be good. But my fantasy is just that, a fantasy. Just like living in Atlantis or on Mars.

I'm mentally disturbed and conscious about it.
That will kill me.

How am I supposed to have friends?
How
How do people do it

good question. i know how you feel. it's not that I have trouble making friends, i just can't find peopke I want to be friends with in the first place. i used to "fit in" on Yea Forums at least, but I'm an adult now and I'm just not as bitter and angsty as everyone here is. i find myself dissenting more and more with the sentiments posted around here, but I'm not becoming more agreeable with the "normiesphere" either. i feel more polarized than ever and i legitimately have not talked to or seen a single likeminded individual in years. i find it ever more difficult to relate to people's opinions, everyone is so volatile and defensive at all times, and if they're not they're anti-intellectual to some degree. people seem so driven by their ego now more than ever before. i just want to discuss things and be happy and spend time with people who also want to do these things and share affection and build relationships, but everyone is so fucking concerned with being right that it has taken precedent over being good. america was a mistake

>Or at least how do I get over my anger, jealousy, and envy?

You just do user. You gotta realize the anger, jealousy, and envy isn't worth it. Humans are humans, nothing is black and white, every one and every thing is complex, from the biggest of sins, to the smallest of mistakes. This includes you and everyone you know. Waste more time on positive energy like forgiveness and less time on the negative emotions, since they will only eat you up inside.

Listen to some frusciante friendo
youtube.com/watch?v=UZpYuNMxFYA

>just woke up
>excited to read leo strauss for 19 hours straight
>been waiting for this for weeks
>can finally do it
>make coffee
>watch 21 episodes of recess in a row

Attached: 5dclaME.gif (960x1064, 1.56M)

The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch is the greatest book ever written.

Wow cool pic!

I made a short self introspection.
Thought about
who I am.
Where I am.
What I've done.
What the future has in hold
for me.
Forced myself to face my regrets.
Thought about the people around me.
Where I want to be in the future.

Did some terrible shameful things and I'm actively being a disaffectioned passive person.
But it's okay, I'm in peace right now, I will get better.
That's what matters.
Who I will be from now on.

Btw writing in these threads is incredibly helpful.

The thing that gets me depressed is that I'm not the person I seem to think I am in my head. Whenever I walk past a mirror I suddenly lose a load of confidence. I hate going to the hairdressers for this reason.

I always dream of kissing a girl, but when I actually do I feel nothing.

what was going on with the assyrians?

Attached: wallisbudge.png (1028x276, 73K)

what race is that? I want to say SE asian, that makes the most sense right?

Maybe you had high expectations

>60% of final grade based on weekly online assignments
why is this allowed

No. I'd rather join the army over that shit. At least you could shoot people.

All rich people should be shot.

A few days ago I told my dad I believed our cat would live a long life, but he disagreed and said that at his weight he wouldn’t make it past the age of ten. That night I had a dream wherein I shot my cat in the neck, then he crawled off to some crevice in the floor and died.

He didn’t come home Sunday night. He’s done this before, but not as often as other cats, only about once or twice a year, and he’s usually back by now, over 30 hours later. Tonight I dreamed that there were several of him, running and playing with each other all over the house. I had a lot of trouble discerning which cat was really him.

If you come back I’ll be sure to put you on a real diet this time. You won’t like it, but it might mean I won’t have to suffer again the heartbreak I’m experiencing right now for a long time.

I wish I had a Myra Hindley type gf to commit crimes with.

You only think that because it's heavily shilled here.

This is sad as hell. It reminds me of a really similar thing I experienced.

A few days ago, when I called my assignment, I thought we would live for a long time, but she did not agree, she drew more than a year. Ten years old. That night I saw a dream: I hit the cats in the throat and fell to the ground and died.

He did not go to Sunday night. Previously, however, like other cats, it returns once or twice a year after 30 hours. I thought someone would go home tonight and play. It was wise to know what a bag was.

If you come back, I'll really eat it now. You will not be satisfied, but for a long time, do not worry.

No, it's the religion I was born with.
2 of my father's brothers and a cousin of my mother are orthodox monks.
My grandparents are and were traditionalists to the core and I was raised mainly by them until the age of 6.
I was deeply influenced by them and if anything I try to popularize it actively here.

I dreamed something similar about my dog that time he was sick.
Now he's doing well luckily.

It occurs to me that most of the bitterness, hatred, and misery of the human condition is stuff that I've seen online. Most of the people I've known in my day-to-day life have been decent folks.

Attached: 1552096894585.jpg (416x416, 13K)

I'm a spiteful miserable being roaming the streets, I simply don't show it.

Would it be awkward/clumsy to try and write an analogy to the concept of love and bitter loneliness between men and women by making a convoluted comparison between them to monsters and monster trappers?

I suppose it would be impossible to try and really make it purely analogical.

I'm too intimidated to try and write it and see if it works though...

I hate living in a fucking commieblock. I want to move out to the countryside away from everyone else. I think i'm a schizoid or some shit, honestly. I can tolerate social interaction but there's nothing i crave more than locking myself away from the world completely and not being bothered by anyone. I hate that im forced to live in this cramped up fucking box, listen to the fucking neighbours banging on the floors and walls in the fucking evening... All the cars and FUCKING BIKES whizzing past. I HATE THIS FUCKING SHIT. It's always been a dream of mine, since i was a kid even. To live in the countryside, next to nature and away from the white noise of the city. I want to live in a shack in the woods with a dog, off the grid from the fucking taxman and automaton people. Seriously. All i want is a to be able to live on my own, not bothering anyone or being bothered by anyone, shitpost, read and lift in peace. Is that too much to ask for?

It just feels like that's how it is when you're bitter. When you feel like men are beasts and women are trappers. The falsehoods. Maybe some truths. It feels right to me.

But, then I think, what would I even accomplish trying to write that out...
Part of me wants my art, part of me realizes my medium is lonely.

I'm not even sure if writing is the medium I should use for this. It seems like I'm more interested in reading my work out in writing groups and sharing it with others actively like that rather than just writing it down "for myself".

I mean, I write for myself sure, but I read it out to others for myself too... I don't get these workshops I've been to where they try and have you shut up for several minutes, write, then share for like 10 minutes or something and not interact at all until then and then when you speak, only share boring dialog about craft that to me, seems to barely ever help.

If I'm writing, I'm writing on my own. If I'm sharing, I want reactions and discussion. I don't understand other writers.

You know, I had this whole idea for a novel, but now I'm uncertain about it because I don't seem to like doing things alone like that and even though I want to set up my whole fantasy world, I hate doing anything remotely close to the side of NaNoWriMo, preferring to think about every line I write and bring all of it together over time rather than just drop text on a page for a hours.

But that's what other writers seem to think should be done. Something about not getting anything done if you don't do that. Granted, I've gotten work done fast and well before but when I'm not feeling, I don't really want to write and if I try to write then, I come up with pages of boring, go-nowhere alphabetic walls.

>writing a fantasy story
>want to write a scene were the main character learns how to dodge monsters by rolling out of the way
>look up how valid rolling is as a combat technique
>turns out it's not valid at all
It's a goddamn fantasy story. Why am I so autistic about this stuff. And don't get me started on leather armor. Fuck.

*hits bong*
DUDE... we are just godhead's thoughts

I have a headache.

Attached: dmd.jpg (361x357, 32K)

God its so hard to get your own life together when your parents are dirt poor retards that just cant function in a 21st century economy

Honestly can Americans get the fuck over 9/11, no one else gives a shit

E questa tristezza che ci avvolge
they said, sitting on the porch
at the flowerful wind
de' Monti Aurunci, closed in a world
far distant above, only unsure
of future and words. They had stable
convictions and marks, e al Sacro Speco
the sanctuary, they kneeled on their coins
and left—for a gallon of stones
e una stanza sul cielo.

niggers

see
You might not give a shit, but its an important milestone when talking about contemporary art, regardless of where you're from.

Stfu you cuck

Name one (1) work of art post-WWII that was greater than 9/11. Note the distinction between great and good

ty. :)

I did preface my first post saying how I don't think 9/11 is a work of art, but I'd argue that artists like Francis Bacon and Lucian Freud have created genuinely 'great' works. Also pic related is staggeringly beautiful and aspires towards the kind of immersion I'm talking about

Attached: furuyoshi campbell.jpg (2400x1903, 1.64M)

amen

Where should I emigrate to if I want to comfortably sit out the world going to shit? I'm living in England at present.

Attached: fine.jpg (316x159, 15K)

oh please, who cares if you fap to traps of all things

Too bad you can't afford guns.

I wish I was cool

Head up north or West country or somewhere m8
Pretty much anywhere in England that isn't a major city is fine

Lucretius was the first poet who also satisfied the definition of polymath, in the sense that his prodigious assimilation of then-known facts about the natural world excluded very little, and from which he could infer much else that was outrageous to official dogma and popular superstition, without prejudice about which was more in error or pernicious. Tendentious only in advocating lofty independence of mind as a universally healing influence, his disregard for the fact of the matter when it comes to the disposition of groundlings--happy only in the intellectual chains of belonging to a team or tribe or cult or whatever--tickles me greatly whenever I think of it. Like one who aspires to the condition of the amiable alien--happiest in solitude but also socially competent in that creaturely way the ordinary affections make us fluent at inhabiting the perspectives of other persons & creatures. But even these, as a demographic, will always be uncommon, whatever their charms to the normal, and their usefulness as canaries in the coal mine of civilization--wherein the pathologically violent hide, or make themselves conspicuous as despots of this or that fief or hearth. It is a pleasure to be affirmed in this way by the fear and loathing of the cold, for it show there's more to come in fine quality of experience, that the innate advantage still thrives.

What’s the fucking point of this

It feels as if I've lost something very important but I can't elaborate what

The thing is I know all this on an intellectual level, but it doesn't stop those feelings from welling up in me. I try not to indulge them, but they're so automatic I'll slip into them without realizing. I suppose I just have to keep working on it.

I am thinking about reading 'A bright future' by Goldstein. However I feel like it represents most of my viewpoints about nuclear energy. Now I am looking for some non-fiction literature to counteract this viewpoint. Not necessarily about the dangers of nuclear power but how there is no need for it because we could replace fossil energies with "clean" energy sources like wind or solar energy and what are advantages of those over nuclear energy.

Any recommendations?

Attached: 410hW2M-VCL._SX321_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg (323x499, 23K)

Wonderful post.

A story idea sparked to some life from this

Attached: DB5541AD-5443-486A-8E81-C74FC4F308F0.jpg (738x980, 81K)

I drank half a cup of vinegar before I went to sleep last night and it was the most uncomfortable sleep of my life. I felt as though I was pissing on myself throughout the night (I wasn't) and my neck was incessantly itchy (possibly an allergic reaction I didn't know about). I read in a book vinegar is good so your cells don't explode in your kidney but man. That was awful.

That's all you can do. If you feel anger or any of those emotions pop up, even if something wronged you, all you need to do is take a step back and ask yourself if it's worth the energy to spend on those emotions or if it's easier to understand, forgive, and move on.
It took awhile for me to learn this myself, but I believe in you user.

>I take myself very seriously.
A sure sign that a person should not be taken seriously.

Underrated comment

I've lost friends and been alienated from social circles for studying philosophy. People don't respect it or understand it. The majority never has, in fact. It's especially bad as an Evangelical Christian. I'm not an apostate, but I can sense the dismissal when I discuss philosophy. The worst is the very same people have a respect if someone can ramble about a subject which is incomprehensible to them, but something that will never challenge their own conscience. The skin is more valuable than the innards.
I can see how Plato developed such a loathing Elitism, and saw most people as dullard and asleep. Asking yourself the deep questions isn't a talented pursuit, it's just a matter of doing it or preferring the easy status quo. The majority don't like it, subconsciously. All that matters is keeping the machine running. It runs counter to their survival instinct.
I recommend reading Seneca's letters. You could find a printed edition called "Letters from a Stoic." He talks a bit about this sort of problem, of living asynchronously.

I was "friends" with a group of people in high school to the extent that I hung out with them during the school day but rarely got invited to actual social activities. Years later I'm still deeply sad I never experienced the things they did, from my position of "looking in" at their lives I feel like I missed out on an enormous amount and my now impossible desire to recreate them has stunted my further development. I want to hang out after school and go swimming in the reservoir, go build a bonfire in the woods, go on a road trip, go to concerts, awkwardly ask a girl out, watch movies late at night in each other's basements, just do all those things I never did.

>but user you can still do all those things
Nominally, but it feels like the character of the relationships you have with people changes once you cease being a child. Probably because most people have continued to grow and mature while I've stagnated more or less. Every year I feel more alienated, I haven't even tried to socialize in months. I'm "okay" with this in the sense that I'm not going to kill myself over it or anything, but I'm still very unhappy.

The worst thing is trying to reconnect with those near-friends from high school. The first summer after our first year of college I did just that, and it actually went pretty well. Had a blast. But since then things have faded to the extent that they feel like a mockery of what it was like. I originally had 15 to 20 people I was in somewhat regular contact with, two years later I can count on one hand the number I've seen in the past year. Romantically it's even worse, haven't even been interested in anyone for close to a year now.

I'm probably delusional and only idolizing this stuff because I didn't experience it, but in the end that's irrelevant to to longing I feel.

Attached: 1547176206.gif (500x338, 464K)

my friends never invited me anywhere either

i think they were just using me for money

I have no idea whats the difference between literature and pseudoliterature.

A girl sat next to me in a classroom today despite having an ample number of vacant seats available to her, so I, in all my inexperience of, and desire for, a romantic life, assume she's fallen madly in love with me after a short group assignment we did together and 5 minutes of bland small talk about academic life just before said class. I hadn't really noticed her beforehand, but seeing her face flush during the brunt of a terrible lecture, our professor going into painstaking detail regarding the minutiae of electrical discharge machining at an obscene volume and speed, as she tried to jot down as many bullet points as she could, her large, round handwriting spanning the whole width of the blank hole punched paper she uses as a notebook, and the circular clasp on her nape glint between stray locks of hair that escaped the short ponytail has me enamored. That, and she has a raspy, deep voice like Scarlett Johansson and a sweet ass.

If your life revolves around women, you're nothing more than a moth revolving a candlelit beam whilst the sun shines brightly outside.

no topic boards are too loose and on topic boards are too tight.

The screaming Ryan Gosling posters never resonate with me. I did have romantic feelings towards people when I was younger and I'm certanly not asexual, but the desire to be in a relationship is absent within me as of now, I never had anything like a waifu, nor do I want to have sex just for the sake of it. I watched a few dramas about love trcently, and none of them got to me. I guess isolation made me emotionally stunted
This is just a low quality blog like many others and a cancer on the face of this thread, but I don't care, guess I really wanted to brag about this to strangers on the internet huh

Fuck...

I feel the same sense of incongruity mostly when I'm interacting with others. I've been neeting it up lately and it has made me into an inarticulate wreck who can't seem to transmit his thoughts as they appear. Like I'm supposed to be this grand person, and I truly believe I am since there would be no reason for confusion otherwise, but I find myself enveloped in an armor of vacuum and unable to pierce the periphery. Though I'm just a simpleton who has had the unfortunate leisure to read too many tales about eloquent frenchmen. Lofty thoughts ought to be left for lofty people.

“From so much self-revising, I’ve destroyed myself. From so much self-thinking, I’m now my thoughts and not I” .

>want to write a scene were the main character learns how to dodge monsters by rolling out of the way
You're not writing a fantasy novel, you're writing a Zelda tutorial.

Accidentally left the lube in the shower and mom found it. She's shocked that a 22 year old man would ever masterbate or have any sort of sexuality. Only son so she doesn't understand how horny males can get. She tried to neuter me when I was a teen with antidepressants. Still wants grandkids though

sometimes I regret getting in so many hobbies and interests am I ruining my potential by diluting it in different cups. have I already passed a point of no return and is it to late to focus on one thing or will I shine as a vertuose in all my fields. I know only the flow of time itself can awnser this question but how can I change roads when the mountain blocks my view.

Attached: 32922148_10214735983747429_7097117097938911232_n.jpg (950x960, 164K)

I had a dream my grandmother was still alive but she didn't even recognize me.

>be bored
>thinking about what to do
>before I even notice hand has moved cursor to address bar and typed in Yea Forums.org
>close tab
>repeat
HELP

i want to write autistic deviantart tier stories but i'm too autistic to maintain an image of the characters personalities in my head and too stupid to come up with plots, while also being too self-aware to make like most deviantart autists and just write anyway.
i always feel bad at the end of the day when i realise i wrote and imagined nothing.

Is it life that gives way to love?
Or is it love that gives way to life?
How in all this can I be above,
The struggle and all this strife?
I never hoped or neither dreamed.
That my life would end in books or become esteemed.
I just am, and for that I am me.
But is this single thing all I can ever be?
Inside my twisted mind in this chaotic world?
For in my dance through life I've only whirled?
Can there be hope and dreams?
Among these people that live on lies and schemes?
I've had given up on their way together with my hope and dreams before.
Told myself this life I won't deal in hands of dissapointment nevermore.
Yet I find myself in love with a being so alike in her manners so the same and more.
Even the fear for hope and dreams are what we share.
So there we stand apart from eachother wanting eachother but going nowhere.

Attached: 1549984878369.jpg (727x868, 237K)

Fuck my head is chaotic sorry for making people read this crap.
>feels

Why does it seem like authoritarians are crawling out of the woodwork these days? Communists, fascists, social justice warriors, religious fundamentalists, ICE, thought police, corporate HR, gun grabbers. Why can't people just let sleeping dogs lie? I want to be left alone and not forced to be around people "who have my best interest in mind".

Attached: porcupine_word_cloud_small.png (799x600, 77K)

because you have an infantile political view and actually believe in individualism

Considering telling my therapist that I've made plans to commit suicide so I can get put on psychiatric hold and get a few days away from my neurotic mother

You should tell your therapist exactly what you posted, it'll do you more good in the long run.

n

I just had a brilliant insight about the theme I'm writing my master's thesis on. Like, holy shit, I'm still in a euphoric state because of it. I had a huge breakthrough and now I'm extremely excited.

I fear my youth is passing me by because I never put myself out there all through school. Hopefully college will be different.

Attached: 2F33726F-702D-47B6-B8AA-E458BBC4DE96.jpg (960x717, 51K)

Have not science and modern thought released man from the tyranny of the merely fortuitous conventions? Have they not established him in his right perspective? This means a new beginning; and the possibilities created thus are without limit.

The theory that the root principle of life is imitation dominates all our practice. With this theory revised, we open up the limitless possibilities of the future.

With post-pagan religion came the transvaluation of the world; if this force has now spent itself, the next transvaluation is due.

Pestilence, one of the great factors in human vicissitude, and accountable perhaps for the wiping out of entire civilizations of which we know nothing, has now been largely conquered. The tremendous potency of the disease germ, that minute colossus which has ravaged mankind, has been definitely checked. Science, in this and a hundred ways as notable, has given man a new significance in the scheme of mundane things. Is it likely that he will fail to rise to the demands of that significance?

This necessary change and transformation of all the conditions of existence . . . this new spirit . . . the Kingdom of Man upon Earth. . . . The new time is upon us with its new knowledge, its new claims, its new aspirations.

Life is a force that has made numerous experiments in organizing itself; let it make another such experiment, and here.

The future will be given to those nations that consciously organize human life for the goals they seek.

Let us take a new lead: let us shape our way to the beauty and grandeur awaiting us in the unknown.

It is not because a people ceases to believe that it falls into decay; it is because it is in decay that, having forsaken the once-fertile dream of its ancestors, it has not replaced this by a new dream, equally or more fortifying and creative of energy.

No great event, inward and divine, befalls those who do not summon it.

Every man, by the inviolable law of his being, is an adventurer, a warrior, a god.

None soars too high if he soars on his own wings.

I turned around one day and suddenly realised I'm the arthoe and nobody will ever settle down with me

I don't know how to create. I'm an amalgamation of everything I've consumed but I don't know how to turn it into something original. I can't write or make music.
My greatest fear is that people will realize how fucking boring I am and leave me.
Been forcing myself to try and write some songs but nothings working

>tfw I am the same

Attached: 1550127417176.png (800x559, 521K)

I wish I were a chupacabra.

This is totally me right now. It hurts man.

I like reading books because its a real life substitute.

>It’s only too late if you’re over 30

Oldfag here. Hurts to say it, but you're probably right.

don't worry sweetheart, I will so long as you weigh less than me and are under 30.
post your softly pale little feet right now

I have no problem with Individualism as long as I am the individual whose Fuhrer.

Wish I'd never become a wageslave.

Attached: 0 The Feel.jpg (1200x1976, 154K)

Every morning i findd myself in the same routine with the same thoughts of changing. Becoming a better me, yet i somehow always screw up and rather indulge in meaningless crap. The reality of things is that the world is in constant movement and change. We know that stagnant water is bad and i feel that i am somewhat stagnant.

I think the most offensive thing about women chiming in about "incels," or having a strong opinion about gender relations in dating and courtship, is that they (unknowingly) elide the fact that their experience is completely different from men's.

Whenever my female friends start talking about dating or their standards for men on Tinder with me, I want to squint at them a bit and go "You do realize your experience of Tinder is different from a man's, right?" Because they really don't seem to understand that the universal cosmic essence of "being on Tinder" is not
>go on Tinder
>look at pictures of people
>swipe right on ones you like
>match with about half of these
>have normal, non-painful conversations with the people you matched with
>try to build a relationship and go on dates from there
for everybody who uses it.

It's like there's an implicit assumption in women's minds that their experience of reality is the baseline, default experience, and their gender has no impact, or their gender can only result in secondary modifications to the baseline that will all be obvious. No, your gender structures people's responses to you in ways that are so subtle, and so taken for granted, that not even the other men are aware of it most of the time.

A woman's mind fundamentally goes, "He's talking about Tinder. Oh! I've used Tinder. Let me share my experiences. Any disparities between our respective differences will be at the surface level, perfectly visible to conscious investigation." So she'll start saying shit like, "well, only 'like' people who you really like, then!" She doesn't realize that to have a shot at talking to ANY WOMAN, AT ALL, an average man has to take any chance he can get, and he's constantly hovering at the line of dating beneath his own standards for what he finds attractive. Most men are actually aiming well beneath that line. Women will tell a 5'4" brown guy to "be himself," because being themselves works for women.

They have no concept that the other half of humanity lives different lives, is subjected to different sorts of scrutiny, and so on. They literally do not understand the difference between having men always approach them first and always maintain the connection, even when they're fucking up or saying weird non-starter shit that would normally kill a conversation, and average (or even fairly above average) men virtually never being approached women, and always having to do all the work to maintain the connection. Women don't understand that if an average guy operates like she does in a dating situation or Tinder convo, and responds with non-starter lifeless not-throwing-the-ball-back-to-the-other-person shit like "haha," the conversation simply ends. Because they've never experienced that. Guys always forgive that when they do it.

I don't care about Tinder specifically, I just find it amazing that women are completely incapable of understanding that life is different on different sides of the tracks.

You have to make it happen or it won't.
t. graduating in a few weeks with zero (0) friends made

I mean this is universal. Maybe men are more aware that they're men when it comes to dating, but in other social spheres they're perfectly happy to dismiss women's different experiences.
Generally people are bad at avoiding generalising their own experiences.

Don't golden mean fallacy me you little queer or I'll slice your fucking head off.

one step closer and i call the nonce police

Attached: 1536816550999.gif (205x185, 47K)

You would not survive the attempt

Attached: 1519842812116.jpg (650x625, 255K)

where does one find good essays and podcasts? i need to improve myself and fill gaps in my knowledge

Came here to post something this. What did I do to deserve being a brainlet?

Attached: 1538593114927.jpg (576x571, 25K)

Same. Going to law school is the worst decision I have ever made. Now I’m 28, working long hours and/or exhausted by my work.
The real right path is not to set yourself up for spiritual failure by getting a “real job” in your twenties. The right path is to tend bar or be a server or do odd jobs and spend your twenties exploring and creating and making a name for yourself outside the sphere of corporate slavery.

God I fucking hate myself.

Honest answers only:
Is the future trad/neo-primitive or do you think it's going to be more like blade runner?
I see the true trends right now, people getting serious about race and land and whatever, and scary scientific breakthroughs.

Attached: 42374725534_a653d1b7cb_k.jpg (2048x1365, 429K)

two*

A combination of both, where software powers hardware designed to look and primitive.

I'm so fucking horny all the goddamn time jesus christ what is wrong with me.

The subtle, acquiescent nature of change. That which lingers after a sunrise debrief.

Kek no never

Are normies actually happy with their lives or do they just appear happy? Assume a generic moderately-successful white millennial if that makes it easier.

Because I do not think I know how to be happy, in a general sense. I am happy at times yes, but my life is neutral at best.

Blade Runner/Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep is based off of a reality where the Nazis won (which is why there's so many Asians/Japanese in Los Angeles), instated interstellar travel, people didn't want to do interstellar travel so they made replicants to do interstellar travel for them and colonize planets before humans got there.
So no.

I have a beautiful loving girlfriend. That said, I have an intense sexual desire to have a gay experience, specifically a trans one. Gets worse as I get older, and I get more afraid as we approach marriage (we’re both 30)

I think highly of myself even though I hate myself and am a complete loser that never achieved anything. I dont see a point to life, I'm a lazy fuck I want to become a story teller and an illustrator so I can create imaginary worlds to dive in at the end of the day, but my writing skills are ao limited and ive hit a wall in drawing because I'm too lazy to work to get better but still i have a terrible urge to draw so i put pen to paper and draw shit i get angry and unsatisfied so I just draw random shit and it feels theraputic, I fantasize too much and some times have wonderful or terrible thoughts that i would end myself if anyone ever knew, this is why I'm afraid of getting wisdom teeth removed cause I've seen people say stupid shit when they are drugged.
I see what's wrong with me but I cant fix, my flaws are the nature of me, trying to change them is pointless because they are deeply engraved. Im not a good person, I'm probably gonna die alone and thats fine but hopefully i can become a decent writer and illustrator.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=823yuWz0lto

Damn, are you me? Maybe I've been watching too many Contrapoints videos but fuck if I wouldn't wreck that boipussy

I might be you.
What is to be done about this longing?

Am i the only one who doesnt find any meaning in life?

Can't you do both?

Yes user, it's only you, you're special. As evidenced by these threads and others across many Yea Forums boards, you are clearly the only person who has ever experienced existential dread or a lack of meaning in your life. The rest of us are LARPing and are actually perfectly neurotypical normies.

I'm going to become a mystic I think.

How do i know that you're real person and not my fruit of imagination?

>A brother came to Abbot Pastor and said: Many distracting thoughts come into my mind, and I am in danger because of them. Then the elder thrust him out into the open air and said: Open up the garments about your chest and catch the wind in them. But he replied: This I cannot do. So the elder said to him: If you cannot catch the wind, neither can you prevent distracting thoughts from coming into your head. Your job is to say No to them.

how do I into reading?
I've got the ADHD
I can read a paragraph but I won't absorb the information within it
Once every page or two I'll want to check my phone or see if I have an email or see if any new youtube videos are uploaded
How do I cultivate focus?
I have many books I want and need to read but I can't

Attached: 191czb8blk311.jpg (1095x2000, 470K)

stop being a faggot

Inaction is the death of man. But what action can be meaningfully undergone in modernity? All seems absent, even in potentiality . . .

Man I wish I had lit dreams. You seem like a cool guy. All I dream about is talking to people I know.

I've become incredibly obsessed and hyper focused on my own age and mortality, this constant feeling of time I have left to live my life running out, like I've wasted years I could have been using proactively and achieving things, that it'll all be over soon and I have nothing to show for it, feeling old and middle-aged already, with everyone else being younger than me, fitter, more energised, with their whole lives ahead of them.
I'm 21. Are such feelings common at this age?

Wow man, just wait til you’re 27. That’s how old I am and let me tell you, it only gets worse.

Apparantely though, when you give up on all your dreams around 30 or so, life becomes quite enjoyable. But for now I feel like a completely failure.

20 year old sister left our church and now my parents want me to shun her

Attached: ofovfeoxi4i21.jpg (1080x995, 560K)

Shun her to me please.

I feel like the overall level of culture and general knowledge of writers from the past its severely underrated. Also, their life experience puts any decent writer from this generation to shame

Cervantes was kidnapped and imprisoned by turks by the time he was 20, was imprisoned again in Spain and overall lived a miserable life (you tried to be content with it, Miguel, ill give you that...) Dostoievsky had a tragic life. Borges went blind, before almost dying from a head injury. Bolaño almost went full unabomber, at least the cabin in the woods part...

What Im saying is: i dont know what the fuck im saying. Im just bitter that Im a talentless hack with more means than every single one of them, but with zero talent or a story to tell.

does anyone else feel inadequate whenever they read something good? as if, whats the point of doing anything. Im not going to achieve that level of literary mastery.

Attached: 66C326BB-A962-463F-AB4D-8FE476AF19B8.jpg (3044x2600, 1.32M)

There was a thread on here with an user worried about his word count being too little. It had a post with a list of famous works and their word counts, does anyone have it?

>those pits
hnghhhhhh

You are sick in the head. Been there. Im pretty sure more knowledgeable people have study this phenomena and have a name for it and all... but this constant phone checking is like being a crack addict. You gotta stop cold turkey. Literally. Find a way to get rid of your phone. Mine was a similar addiction (videogames); I sold my computer. Have no consoles left. Im happier overall. I read more than ever. I feel better about myself, sleep better etc...

The attention thing i can relate too. It got better now. I feel like I can go pages without even distracting myself. Something that still in the works but thats the least of your problems. Fix the phone shit first

I want time to freeze time so I can lazy around in my room and heal from today. I don't want tomorrow to come so soon.

I stabbed my finger. It was dripping blood everywhere for like 20 seconds and then it stopped.
Wow. The human body is amazing.

I want to marry young and have a lot of children.

I feel you user, very strongly

I did all that shit in high school, and since the end of high school, I've had absolutely none of that. based on my personal circumstances I can almost guarantee you one-hundred-percent that your life is better than mine is right now. those memories aren't precious to me, they only make me feel like shit now because of how selfish and hollow those relationships actually turned out to have been, with me being too naive to realize it

grass is always greener on the other side

admiration is not the same as love

admiration is based on achievement

love is based on understanding and respect

you can't win real love with achievement. if someone can't love you despite you having not achieved anything, then they don't really love you

Attached: doggykitty.jpg (337x450, 41K)

perhaps we are just better off being alone, or, at least, limiting our relationships to those that natural occur from living in society

these threads are honestly some of the best stuff to read on the internet

I feel way less alone. some of these threads are superior to others, but its especially good when people are scathingly honest. "what is most personal, is most universal"

What is your life now that makes you think mine is better?

If this flu stole my gains I'm gonna be pissed

I have a chronic pain issue that is literally daily torture, screaming into a pillow crying level torture, every day. Doctors can't find anything. Don't have disability. Don't have a job. Don't have any friends. I am in the house 24/7. I have also developed severe anxiety connected to all this. I don't go anywhere, I don't have any money, I don't have any friends, and every single day is pretty hellish, and I have no idea what to do about it. Doctors have offered painkillers but I've tried that before and was a total zombie, been clean for 2 years from them and now I don't know what else to do rather than considering going back on them. Don't have the energy to muster up for much of anything. Try to distract myself much of the time. sorry for the low quality post.

I'm interested in politics mostly because I'm paranoid.
I hear about bililonaires exploiting poor people overseas and ruining the enviroment and I'm pissed. I hear about "marxist" subversion of traditional structures and I feel afraid.
It feels like I'm being tricked no matter which side I take, this fucking sucks.

Attached: tumblr_o5g3uzAfSI1u5vzw4o1_1280.jpg (1280x1477, 1.07M)

Reality is broken user, don't trust anything you hear.

Attached: 1541346584338.jpg (847x2086, 891K)

user, I can't say much about it, but I really disagree with on that. But maybe I don't know how to love.

Well, what is it?

I've only been alive for less than a decade and a half. And it's strange to me still that man and woman would be so antagonistic toward each other on the romantic scale. Man and woman are of the same species, each being biologically and emotionally necessary for each other in order to survive (bearably) and propagate the species. For the last several decades, with the 'women's rights' movement, a cultural war has divided men and women and destroyed the family unit, causing a deterioration of stability across the Western World. Divorce, unhappiness, and hedonism have taken the place of the arranged marriage and the Christian model of marriage.

But it is obvious to me now that there is a counter-counterculture in the conservative mass. With Donald Trump's victory in the United States election, widespread mistrust of the media, and an extreme vaccuum left by athiestic modernism, the world is actually prime for the pendulum to swing back, and it is my hope to ride that wave, to success, and to happiness, to be a part of the counterculture of this time, against the disruption and chaos of warfare that is cultural 'innovation.'

As I understand it, there is no better time to stand up and to share one's thoughts, to write books, to make shows, to share one's thoughts, to sacrifice comfort and consolation in exchange for the knowledge piercing yourself and myself and all who hear; that we were a part of this movement as it began; that we were not afraid anymore to avoid what is considered incorrect by the mob.

May true democracy reign. May your sons and daughters see you as Kings. May your consciences fight back and bring true Order out of this chaos.

Post pic of sister and I'll tell you of you should shun her or not.

>I've only been alive for less than a decade and a half
So you're like 13 years old?
MOOOOODS

yikes

When you watch too many Jordan Peterson videos

Thanks for the humility guys.

I meant two and a half decades.

I think I've reached peak maturation of my philosophy. Life really sucks.

Attached: alucard.jpg (650x1200, 135K)

This is a picture of her praying

Attached: anya-taylor-joy-thewitch.jpg (1200x680, 146K)

S this is what the edgy teenage atheists of this generation are like.

Please.
Let me go

it's just so weird how well humans can recognize faces. there's this new girl in class that i had never directly looked at (since i always walk with a hunched back, looking to the ground). she sits on the opposite side of the room and i catch glimpses of her face all the time but i never directly look at it (i never look directly at cute girls, because i'm ugly as fuck, and i'm afraid it will happen to me what happened to a friend: he used to stare alot at this girl he liked; she for whatever reason didn't like the attention and eventually chimped out on him, saying "stfu weirdo, it's obvious you have a crush on me but i'll tell you what, you'll never have me or any girl at all you fucking virgin". since then, i'm afraid a girl will humiliate me or accuse me of rape for looking at her). so today i ended up locking eyes with her for half a second and my suspicions were confirmed, she's so unbelievably qt. and it's ridiculous how i had never really seen her face, yet, i absolutely knew she was qt and she was (i don't know how to describe her because i barely seen her face, but picture a really qt spanish girl, like ana de armas).

Capitalism has a problem.
There was this game with rules, you see? And for a good long while things worked fair and well. The best at the game got a chance to prove themselves and rose to the top through hard work.
Now the game has outgrown the rules. And no one has yet rewriiten the rules to accommodate this bloated game. No one has driven a much-needed spike into its ankle and said "at this level, you must think of others for the good of all." No one has done that. Maybe you can write those rules. Can you see them? Good. Because I might shoot myself tomorrow.

Attached: 1915608_514045562234_7416976_n.jpg (561x456, 25K)

Stop fetishizing women, breeders.

>There was this game with rules, you see? And for a good long while things worked fair and well. The best at the game got a chance to prove themselves and rose to the top through hard work.
COMPLETELY delusional. There was a brief period in the West where, due to general prosperity and the work of labor activists, that the middle class flourished. But it was always an aberration.

Let's just agree to skin the Clintons.

Hi there!

You seem to have made a bit of a mistake in your post. Luckily, the users of Yea Forums are always willing to help you clear this problem right up! You appear to have used a tripcode when posting, but your identity has nothing at all to do with the conversation! Whoops! You should always remember to stop using your tripcode when the thread it was used for is gone, unless another one is started! Posting with a tripcode when it isn't necessary is poor form. You should always try to post anonymously, unless your identity is absolutely vital to the post that you're making!

Now, there's no need to thank me - I'm just doing my bait to help you get used to the anonymous image-board culture!

yes

yikes

i was doing that for like, the past half hour attempting to write a review for an album i like, but then by complete reflex ctrl+a and backspaced because i made a typo. deleted the entire review and it was at like 4 paragraphs, had been writing for the past 30 mins or so. probably won't write the review now

why didn't you just ctrl+z you absolute nigger

If you truly were my friend, you would help me with what is best for me.

Dropped out of a shitty math program and a shitty state university. The fuckers told me I've tested out of all the courses I was allowed to, and that I'd have to sit through a years worth of bullshit I already knew. I basically convinced my parents to let me freeload, and have a couple years ahead of me to drive myself insane with maths and reading. I really have nothing else going for me, so giving into the temptations of NEET life will be my end. Wish me luck.

Attached: 1461864148793.gif (500x288, 558K)

How many courses could you possibly have to take before you start doing proper math?

I was only allowed to test out of integral calc. Even the honors courses aren't rigorous (the reason, one instructor told me, is that "quantified reasoning went over peoples heads"). I'd then have to take a course on sequences and series, then two vector calc courses, and finally I'd be allowed to take an introduction to proofs (a junior level course, which can be passed after reading the first chapters of any reputable proof textbook). Then will I be allowed to take "advanced calculus" which is comparable to most freshman honors calculus courses at good math universities. That opens up most upper division courses for me, but I have no reason to suspect they get any better. A total waste of time and money. Fucking engineers man.

oh man that's actually really bad, sorry user. my uni doesn't have a great maths program and even we force people to start doing proofs their sophomore year at the latest. Hope it works out for you. /mg/ over on /sci/ is pretty decent if you're going to be self-studying.

in the same boat. i think of my self as a tough man but repressed memories flood back in my dreams. HS, lost opportunities, stress for exams, insecurities. its a tragic phantasmagoria

I want to learn how to write fiction and draw but I've never done it before. I don't want to be a wageslave. I want to fucking finish university. I'm fucking tired of this shit.

I wish we could, pal, but it’s not so easy to stop 300 million people from sperging the fuck out. You really should be blaming the government for spinning it into a bigger deal than it was in order to grab oil. America sucks but its not going away. I’m sorry, I wish things could be better.

i hate people who can actually create things because they started young
especially musicians

i don't even want to play an instrument, i'd satisfy for being able to just compose stuff digitally, but every fucking "how 2 music" guide begins with "remember when you did music lessons in school?"
no, no i don't remember that, i don't remember that because my school was shit and my parents were poor, wanna fight about it?

i'm fucked, i will never create anything but self-pitying imageboard posts.

haha sux 2 b u

>after school
Dude, you're just a kid.

im in uni but yea I would agree

You don't get to 500 million friends without making a few enemies.

Saw an advertisement for a psychological experiment on chemical responses to fear and stress. They shock you with electrodes and show you gore pics, very strange. It's totally legitimate, too.

War on heaven. Eternal war on heaven.

Clown world I tell you what.

you should read The Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Milller

one of my favorite books

you've gotta be more kind to yourself dude. I've been in this mental state before and it does not foster any growth or positivity. hit the gym and start eating healthy if you aren't already.

this guy gets it.

most people don't show the ugly side of them for many reasons. I'm not denying there are decent folks, but their counterparts far outweigh them. Most people in general are pretty boring, passionless things just walking around. Some of them aren't even self aware enough to be sad about things aside from the obvious. If they are, then they're probably self aware enough not to show that disdain.

the 9/11 oil-myth is purely that: a myth. You should look into. I didn't know about it until the past year, but it's intersting.

some peak Gen Z cringe right here

Gr8 b8 m8
a whole generation of publicly schooled autists who think exactly like this is coming just around the corner

I'm going to skin that women and fashion her into a hat, and then I'm going to feed her and her family to tumblr.

I'm in Japan and I met a girl there, in a youth hostel. At 27, I can feel I'm getting old. Life just feels colder. The girl was 6 years younger and still so vibrant and frail, like a bee. We slept in the same bed because we both somewhat wanted it, and nothing happened. But in the morning, in the early light in our shitty little hotel room, I touched her black hair and she got a little close so I could touch her more. Neck, shoulders, cheek. It lasted maybe 10 minutes but I already know it will be one of my most cherished memories. Then we got up, left, and went out separate ways. No news since. Life is strange.

Sorry if this sucks, english isn't my first language.

Lately I feel like my mind is no longer in control. It's my body that's calling the shots. I live behind the eyes and forget myself as it rubs itself, breathes heavily through my mouth and rubs itself. It rubs itself as I forget myself.

Then why did we invade iraq user, purely to prop up the military industrial complex and Bush's poll numbers?

Cringe. Or rather, laughable. It's so cringe that it makes me laugh, so not sure if cringe or not.

If it's any consolation to you, I was forced to do eight years of band in primary and secondary school and three years of college band and I still have no musical talent, bad pitch, and still can't count well. Some people just aren't musically talented no matter how hard they try

You write very well for someone who didn't learn English as their native language. Any chance you can contact this girl again? There's no harm in trying user.

It's more cringe-worthy to say or write the word 'cringe' than it is to actually cringe.

You need to learn music theory. I'm sure youtube has something.

My story in my head has gone in for so long I've forgotten the actual origins. I wish I would actually write shit down.

Only the three first sentences make sense.

I'm just not attracted to women anymore. I've been on maybe five dates my whole life and it just didn't feel "right", like there wasn't a connection. I'm on antidepressants now, which make me functionally asexual, but even before I had a very low libido. My first goal in life was to be a servant of God through being a priest or presbyter, then once I became an atheist, I wanted to be a woman. Once that didn't work out, I wanted to join the military, but I couldn't because of my medical history. Finally, I wanted to settle and be a father, but now it looks like that's not going to happen. What's left to do now? Drugs? Alcohol? I'm pretty sure I'll kill myself before I thirty. YOLO, right?

Attached: 1550843490054.png (600x521, 227K)

Exercise, eat healthy, and get better sleep. I went through the same thing, and those three changes cured me.
Also start with the Greeks.

I feel like depressed people are right. They are a bit insane in their own way, but it's positive and active people that seem uncanny to me. They have restless eyes and a psychotic vibe.

Attached: qt.jpg (1600x2417, 559K)

estas beauty

MY NECKS ALL FUCKED, NIGGA

>tfw writing an impressionist post-modern novella about my oneitis

Impressionism is confined to painters.

polyrhythm is just qualitative verse haha lol! music poetry and math are all related in a very obvious way owo what does it mean bros

Does anyone else just get overwhelmed with how much shit there is in philosophy and theology and sciences and all that shit? I think of myself is a pretty smart person usually but honestly I’m beginning to think that’s a misconception because despite being interested in philosophy it all seems like too much. It’s an abyss you’ll never reach the bottom of. There’s more significant text in philosophy than you’ll ever be able to really analyze and appreciate in a lifetime. This isn’t even getting into how the forefront of science touches on it, like quantum mechanics. Life is so complicated that when I think about it all I just feel defeated. I’m in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction because so many people are above my head and I’ll never reach them.

And musicians philistine

symbolist lit is sometimes called impressionist

bump

Of course they are right. The earth is dying. They are expressing health in their despair. It's so bad that to be healthy is to be screaming.

Meh. Think through thoughts and counter-thoughts by yourself and later realize there are grandiose terms to describe the thoughts you thought. Just keep at it, you'll be fine. If your heart sings (and it sounds like it does), embrace your ignorance as you learn, grow, and eat. It will lead you to glorious vistas in time.

And quantum mechanics very much relies on scale. Don't let the cultists fool you otherwise.

Who else has read the Christchurch shooter's manifesto? How would you compare it to other similar manifestos?
pastebin.com/bzZyMduP

the fact that some mentally ill person gets some widespread infamy for killing 30 people is vile. the internet is vile. i hate everyone

no one ever shoots up politicians or celebrities or anything that is such bullshit instead innocent people fucking cunts

>reading the ramblings of some faggot who shot women and children like fish in a barrel

pass

me

Thank you. I wrote something to her yesterday, saying she was beautiful and touching and that I'd like to see her again. No response yet. We'll see! I'll post something in this thread if I hear from her.

I'm enjoying this myself. Or it at least feels therapeutic. I keep coming across all these feelings people are expressing that, for whatever reason, I often times feel alone in having.

gonna do a bunch of drugs tomorrow and write an entire novel

I FUCKING HATE MY NEIGHBOUR SO MUCH

I don't know if you wrote this, but I can't find it elsewhere on the internet. It's really nice. Thanks for posting it.

don't shoot yourself today please anonymous

I know a lot of it is just memes/LARPing but all the posts on /pol/ celebrating this attack are sick

My goal is to go to school get a career to make some cash to fund some business exploits, hope one takes off and sell it so I can retire relatively young with the profits. Idealy...

Sounds a lot like my situation.

/pol/ contains many legitimate fascists I don't know why you're surprised, the people who think it's """ironic""" fascism to make fun of liberals are simply delusional.

Bump

You might be right but it's very rare for women to marry men who make more than them or are lower on the ladder in terms of socioeconomic status.