/cric/

Lyon was out at the exact (EXACT) second this thread was posted.
Spooky innit.

not today mate

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rip phil

Fuckitybye

no need to catch that one

shipping forecast lads

So yeah, feel like i jinxed it with this thread

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based

What a boring, contrived stat

Hazlewood big innings here i reckon

>poot

>dropped again
English fielding lads

please execute the coward joe root

C O W A R D

:]]]]]]]]]]]

Root needs a century to make up for his fielding

Not bad, lad

OH NONONONONONO LADS AUSTRALIANS GO GET YOUR PIES, FUCK OFF TO BED

If Joe Root wasn't such a coward he'd be less of a coward

Boourns

Omg

Cheers Paine, great decision this is shaping up to be.

Needs to be hanged in Trafalgar Square alongside Tim Paine after this match tbqh

ah yes, the tricky few overs before close

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>69

looking grim for pozzies

See the strut after he caught it? Joe Root can fuck off, Burns is our captain now

why didnt curran play before lads

feel like pure shit just want jimmy back

>Cummins opens the bowling
Bit keen tbqh

How many wickets will > we lose before the days end

I'll ask again:
Would you open with Marsh if he's hitting 90mph?

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burns has been the de facto captain for many tests, he's the brains of the operation now jimmy is ded

Not if Australia don't lose this match. Hangings of series winning captains is not allowed.

Business idea: Burns and Stokes co-captains.

No, everybody in Australia hates him so he's got no hope

2

Nope
Hazlewood and Cummins too good to pass up
But if the ball is swinging then a short spell by whoever is bowling worse between the two

13.

4

Get used to this lads, you'll be seeing it a lot over the next ten years

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Nah, he deserves to be hanged for his abysmal work this series

Only the nightwatchmen Denly and Root

1 if Leach comes in at 3

He's outpacing both occasionally though. I don't think we expected that from Marsh.

>See the strut after he caught it?

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Fine, we're offering him asylum

ALPHA

chad stride

Not all about pace idiot
Cummins is literal too good of a bowler to pass up the new ball over someone else
Hazlewood very similar as well
Depends on how the ball moves as what Marsh does good with

Archer 6/62

But Broad is still getting most of the wickets.

The walk on a man with >5 inch penis

Based

And make him captain for your test team please while you are at it

someone should glass him

The chad Burns and the coward Root

Australia just nede one other batsman to score a 50 or more
don't care who it is but just one more player

go back to anime posting shithead

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But Starc was that role right... now with this pace they have an all rounder with that pace.
Grim for Starc though.. no offence to starc who is test worthy himself.

>no nightwatchman

fucks sake, here we go again.

Deal.

>when you realise no lead will feel big enough because of Smoth

Wicket this over

is joe root low iq or genius?

>BOWLING CUMMO
nice nickname

What is wade saying lads

Seething cheating

>Say hi to my daughter for me will ya

Very high IQ shot from Burns, truly the people's captain

good time wasting lads

australians trying to even the iq by brain damaging >our batters

yea i said batters cunts, do something

>what accounts for less than 10% of the England team yet produces 60% of the wickets

>clocking one on the lid to waste time before the close

based

if that was archer aussies would be seething now

Burns looked sexy as fuck taking that helmet off

This is the strategy lads

Is Archer the most overrated bowler in world cricket right now?

I like a bit of roughousing as much as the next man, but this is getting dangerous now from Cummings. Umpires should give him a warning, and then suspend him indefinitely if he has the audacity to bowl short again

Thought the same.

Why is Warner always smiling? What on earth does he have to be happy about?

based cummo helping us kill 10 mins at the end of the day

they've always been called batters here I don't know what the aussies get so mad about

Stealing a living

Cope

Burns would be hotter if he cut out that weird lean to leg before the ball is delivered

he's made a good start to his career

Lads why is bumble so based

Thinking about all the men that have fucked his wife and the thought of cleaning up afterwards

>urban spaceship man?

put that england tag against his name and see any breakthrough bowler suddenly seethed against and called overrated

How confident would that guy have had to have been to do that ad in the buff with all those people around

Why does burns gave that gay emo haircut? is he wearing mascara too?

t.incel

Jealous are ya?

I'M THE URBAN SPACEMAN BABY I'VE GOT SPEED
I'VE GOT EVERYTHING I NEED

Cricket is growing thanks to things like Hughes user. The danger makes this sport stand out from most ball sports.
Only sports like mountaineering, bull riding or F1 are that dangerous. Maybe also ice hockey, but the danger is less a tactic of that game. Cricket literally makes it the tactic and that's why people do it.

Prefer Hinge myself but each to their own

you know you think you're poor, but then I have five different cheeses in the fridge and I'll probably in line fore the guillotine when it comes.

the famously popular sports of
>mountaineering, bull riding or F1

Whats the difference between jam and marmalade?

When I used to be captain back in the early 2000s I pioneered the use of the reverse batting order to strike confusion and fear into the heart of the opposition bowlers. The idea hasn't caught on, but I'm still convinced that there's merit in it

Sun's almost down, really should end the day now.

The matador is really popular in the Latin World and for good reason - you die if you screw it up badly. Bordering on an extreme sport.

t. gay emos

Install
LYRICWIKI

LYRICWIKI
The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band:Big Shot
StarIconBronze.png
LangIcon.png
Big Shot
This song is by The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band and appears on the album Gorilla (1967) and on the compilation album The Best of the Bonzo Dog Band (1990).

I am the Big Shot.
You heard me right the first time, name of bachelor, Johnny Cool.
Occupation: big shot. Occupation at the moment: just having fun.
What a party that was, the drinks were loaded and so were the dolls.
I narrowed my eyes and poured a stiff Manhattan, then I saw... Hotsy.
What a dame, a big bountiful babe, in the region of 48-23-38. One hell of a region.
She had the hottest lips since Hiroshima, I had to stand back for fear of being burned.
"Whisky-wow-wow", I breathed; she was dressed as Biffo the Bear.
In that kind of outfit, she could get rolled at night...
And I don't mean on a crap table.

"It's kind of revealing, isn't it?"
"Revealing? It's positively risqué, I like it."
She said, "You're the man of a thousand G's, right?"
"A thousand what?", I quipped,
"Why, G-man, girls, guns, guts... You're my type"
"Wrong, baby!", I slapped her hard, "I'm an L-man. Strictly liquor, love and laughs"
She stared over my shoulder. "Play it cool, Johnny."
"Play it what?", I flipped. "Listen, I fought my way up from tough East-Side New York. Lead-filled socks and sub-machine guns. Like this!"

She said, "Johnny this is a deadly game, have a few laughs and go home."
I shuddered. Normally I pack a rod; in pyjamas I carry nothing but scars from Normandy Beach.
I said, "Wrong, baby, you can't fool me."
She spat playfully. "I'm ahead of you, Johnny."
I studied the swell of her enormous boobs and said,
"Baby, you're so far ahead it's beautiful!"

"You, you are, you're eccentric, I like that."
"Electric, Cherie, bugged off my rocker, tu comprends?" We spoke French fluently.
Our lips met again and again, "Yeah yeah yeah," I slobbered.
Hotsy said, "You're slobbering all over the seat, kid."

>the Latin World
didn't that end 1000 years ago?

the only thing the reverse batting order ensures is that you definitely have a proper batsmen stranded not out and the end of an innings. it's always been a retarded idea

Cope

only its relevance

matadors are in bullfighting not bullriding, and it's becoming way less popular and banned in places because it is literal animal cruelty

Worth it to disrupt the rhythm of the bowlers. They're used to bowling well atthe start and then being shit at the end, getting them to do it backwards just messes things up for them entirely

why do they keep calling cummins fatty?

bit mean.

Are you kidding?
You seen the bull runs in Spain?
People are interested in that sort of thing now. The media gimps saying otherwise are retarded.

>matador
>bull riding
Based retard.

Australia look cooked here lads

>bowling average sub 20 playing his first 4 tests in a high pressure series
yeah definitely overrated, absolute fraud

They're calling him Patty, it's his girl name.
On a related note, imagine Cummins and Burns in the bedroom together, going at it hammer and tongs

Bull runs aren't the same as bullfighting either, I've been to Spain and I've seen the closed down former bullfighting arenas that've been converted into shopping centres

Woops I meant bull fighting

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D R O P P E D

>dropped

Is Smith the overrated bastman in test cricket right now? Can think of 10-20 better batsmen just off the top of my head

HaHaHaHaHarris

DROP

kek

l m a o

business idea: catch the ball when a batsman hits it towards you

incompetent idiots

not liking this new "get all your runs from extras" strategem >we are going for desu senpai

can think of 10 better batsmen this series, and this is meant to be his 'GOAT' series. total fraud 2bh

I'm liking the side affect of surviving these last few overs though lad

Might be dying there maybs. Wouldn't be in Latin America because they actually have testicles.

clown cricket all round

the minds that brought you brexit

controversial

ohhh get dabbed on
four of the finest runs thank you barkeep

The state of this umpire.

What is pitching outside leg.

bull riding is damaging on the testicles

>surviving

cheating umpire

kumar knows burns is left handed right?

>reviewed

Great review :]

not out ofc

I think the umpires have been smoking a fatty boom batty before every session this series

Wtf is the umpire doing lma, nice try lad

I can think of one based on the stats, Bradman. Average is in the 60's after this many tests...

>that dismissal

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SAME OLD AUSSIES

ALWAYS CHEATING

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pitching outside leg and way too high kek

chad review

If the bowlers are appealing it's probably out. If it's not, the batsman can appeal. - Elite umpire.

that was a full on club cricket umpire not knowing the LBW law wicket, not a fucking test umpire who umpired in the WC final

STUMPS!

Tomorrow shaping up to be a fantastic day of cricket, for better or worse.

gonna make a cup of tea lads, how do you guys want yours? got black, peppermint and green.

Yeah we'll have a bowl please mate

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That was one of the worst LBW calls I've seen 2bh. Never looked close.

Wait, did he just give us six runs for a successful appeal?

english breakfast tea with milk and don't ever offer me that gay hippie shit again

peppermint please

this game is literally a dead rubber
england team is totally shit and not worthy of your time
why are you watching

I'll have a peppermint please

anything with milk?

semen and blood

How dare he give qt Burns out. Mind you if we'd got Smith out like that with no reviews left...

cummins and paine?

>this game is literally a dead rubber
not really considering the series would be a draw, which means australia didn't win, like they haven't in england since half the australians who post on /cric/ were born

test championship points
can still stop Australia from winning a series in England for the first time in 18 years

you want to ask for black tea with milk, wouldn't fancy mint or green with milk desu

I meant bull fighting.
I kinda want to see bear fighting.
And shark racing.

>he doesn't drink poodhna with dhudh

Tbh think drawing this series would be a big deal. Big difference between a clear series win and >muh retained ashes on a technicality
Not going to happen though as Smith will singlehandedly chase what ever Australia end up needing

2-2 would be a fair result.
Both captains utterly embarrassing and make poor decisions. Smith justifies the Ashes being retained. Fuck Root and fuck Paine.

>Currans accent

Why can England not stop stealing Saffies and Indies players? Sad desu

2-2 but whoever has watched the series will know that Australia have clearly been the more dominate side and that England were extraordinarily lucky for it not to be 3-1

Because South Africa doesn't want them

Now this we can agree on

extraordinarily clutch more like

jokes on you he is from zimbabwe

Paine deciding to bowl first is shaping up to be the worst single decision of the series
I mean ultimately it didn't lose them the Ashes or anything but looking at it subjectively

his family farm was seized by Mugabe

like this lol?
youtu.be/Alx8Y9sTZos?t=430

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kek

we didn't steal, zimbabwe is unfortunately an absolute shithole so his family came here so they don't you know die horribly

Based Mugabe

Smith is due for a low score. Rest of the Australia team will crumble as normal.

Not really. England's win in the third test was entirely on merit. The Australians when bowling/fielding at the end were completely braindead and deserved to lose.

meant this

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>banned in places because it is literal animal cruelty
Apparently bulls live in conditions similar to the wild so they are more vicious. That's actually less cruel than keeping them on a tiny field or in pen.

I actually do agree that australia have been the better team across the whole series but that doesn't really count for much inherently, I would have said the same thing about the aussies in 2009 but they still lost 2-1

reckon big bob mugabe knew we could do with a twink zoomer left arm swing bowling allrounder to compete in test cricket

>Smith is due for a low score.
Mate we've been saying that for the last 10 ashes tests

Who is your favourite /cric/ poster lads?

for me, its me

would probably go with myself

him

doesn't really change the fact they slowly kill the bull cruely, also horses always die in bull fighting as they let the bull gore a horse and then start stabbing the bull with spears

the one and only

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I'd like to know where this ranks in terms of the all time lowest 1st innings aggregate for both teams at the oval

jjust made myself a really nice vegetarian burrito

you can get these bags frozen from tescos and theyre only like 3 quid so its not even expensive anymore

and to be honest with you lads you dont even miss the meat. i mean i dont except for on sunday dinners

Daniel

bullfighter=root
horse=jofra
spears=woakes and curran

won an absolute steal of an ebay auction but i really dont think the guys gonna send it

i've been thinking about going veggie for a while but I have really been getting into cooking over the last couple of years and it would be a shame to throw the vast majority of the recipes I have perfected in the bin

2009 was a kino series. Ponting's last tour, Flintoff's last test. Swann, Broad and Trott coming through. The Aussie's were arguably better, but they shat the bed against Broad

You don't know bullfighting mate, they basically are killing the bull slowly whilst he tries to attack, as he is becoming weaker and dying, the matador.

we've not really played well in a home ashes for ages and always won, jimmy and bread carried us in 13 and 15, and jimmy is dead now so it's no shock we can't win

Lots of veggie recipes to learn lad, broaden your horizons a bit. Indians, Italians, Mexican - loads of cuisines lends itself well to veggie stuff

team >we should be picking for the start of next summer
>burns
>sibley
>denly
>poot
>stokes
>pope
>foakes
>curran
>archer
>leach
>bread
unless jimmy hasn't retired them him instead of curran and push everyone up one spot and jimmy to 11

dabbled with vegetarianism when i was living abroad but not anymore as now im back home living with mum and she cooks my dinners lol

just tell her the quorn stuff is healthier and will help her be less of a fat cunt and she'll be all over it like a tramp on chips

thats what happened with mine anywau

just have meat once or twice a week and then you can splash the cash a bit more on good cuts

desu though i still dont eat a lot of meat

Any home series really. Very much like 90s Windies when the batting was really brittle but they knew Walsh and Ambrose were going to keep them in it and 250 might be competitive

i'm considering going veggie on moral grounds more than anything else because I really like animals and I am being a bit of a hypocrite

think the only meat you should eat is fish

Sir Chris Woakes.

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Sebbo

waiting for highlights lads

I would still eat fish because fish are bastards

>2009
Broad getting Ponting, Hussey and Clarke in consecutive overs is probably the best spell of bowling he's ever done.

>denly

my favourite moment of the 2009 ashes was graham onions getting 2 wickets with the first 2 balls of the day at edgbaston. knocked back mike hussey's off peg first ball with a beauty

If you were Paine, how would you justify your decision to bowl first to the press /cric/?

>he forgot 8-15 in the first morning of an ashes test bowling australia out in under 100 balls

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blame the coin

way more variety in seafood than land meat anyway

Swap Stokes and Pope in the order and that sounds about right

'It Happens Mate'

err yeah errrm really thought we hit the right lengths eerrr weve retained the ashes eerrr steve smith can have my wife errr

not his actual best bowling though, he got rogers and smith with good deliveries but the rest was retarded batting

I have been a vegetarian for 5 years it’s not difficult go for it lad

we need to control our fishermen or there'll be no fish left

Does it?

but.. muh recipes
I won't be able to do my smoked sausage and beer stew

>Most of Australia hates me

Why are Australians such cruel and vicious cunts lads?

Because Tony Blair is a fucking idiot.

Not me.
But also me.

I like both of the currans
they love the battle, and they have that classic surrey prick air about them

Compare that agony to a lifetime in a small pen.

just killing bronze dragons for my slayer task lads

That was on a spicy pitch, cloud cover and poorer batsman. Smith hadn't reached his final form yet.
The 2009 spell was on a flat track, sunny day, against three of the greatest batsman Australia has ever had.

All these replies and not a single vote for me. Sad!

I find it pretty fun learning how to replace meat in recipes and it still being nice and if you enjoy cooking you’ll like it too
Phase it in over a period of time

Victorians/New South Welshmen*
Vics always hated the WA chad, hence why they probably used dirty tactics in that recent afl game.
Bet those blues dips tricked young Bancroft too.

Has anyone seen Mike Judge and Jonathan Trott in the same room at the same time?

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I thought of doing 3 nights a week to start with so that might be the best way to build up some meals
problem is I have absolutely no imagination and can't think of meals as anything other than meat + veg

For me, it's old south Wales

You are "not me".

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went to old south wales on holdiay once
nice nature but pretty boring ngl

>mums getting noticeably older and slower
not a fan of these primitive times

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pretty sure my dad doesn't have long left
no particular health problems but he is a fat cunt and drinks and smokes so can't imagine him living far past 70

If we're being honest south Wales is actually the worst part of Wales. Cardiff and Swansea are shite, Pembrokeshire and Snowdonia are comfy, simple as

pembroke is where I went. I thought that was south wales

housing is really cheap though and you have places like Bristol and Bath just over the bridge

also did an 80km hike in snowdonia for duke of edinburgh. still passed but we totally fucked up right at the end by coming down the wrong side of the mountain

So many recipes
So many vegetarian versions of classic meals just google stuff with vegetarian after it

yeah no shit. south wales is infested with english people. in pembrokeshire they even sound enligsh

>Consistently play well in First Class cricket
>Don’t get picked
>Sometimes play well in international limited overs cricket
>Get picked

IPL is the ultimate test because you are playing against teams assembled of the greatest players in the world.

>IPL is the ultimate test because you are playing against teams assembled of the greatest players in the world.

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and about 3 indians who have to play due to squad restrictions that can barely hold a bat

Nice sarcasm detection freshie

retard

I'm counting it as south-west desu, but I could be completely wrong

tfw all of you missed the GOAT batsman

lmaoing at you young cunts

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baited

Ha ha I was just pretending to be retarded

yo

it's the hyper man set

There's no difference, marmalade is the Portuguese word for the oranges or something like that.
I once had a massive ongoing row with a Scotsman over this.

whens the london /cric/ meet happening

Based sebbo lads

Jam is sweet
Marmalade is tart

/cric/ should meet in rising nations like Japan and Nigeria.

Snowdonia sounds comfy and Pembrokeshire reminds me of those cute cattle dogs.

know some lovely bars in Angel that we can go to lads

>japan
>not south korea

Italia? Don't fancy visiting Nigeria after reading Mick Foley's memoirs, and Japan is far.

Thoughts on chilli jam?

I will be in london 3 weekends time, free after 2pm saturday

A fraudulent contender for the status of jam
A condiment at best

Snowdonia area kingdoms were the last true welsh kingdoms actually, so that makes sense.

Surely we should just go to a match. Oval tickets for a first class game are cheap as fuck on the gate.

No, potato. You're wrong. It's made by the Russian lady Sofia Semyonovna Marmeladova. Read a book ffs.

Jam is a process. I'm having the flashbacks.
Yeah, ok if you wouldn't spread it on buttered toast you've a point.

All go to a match then all hire Warne's 2 prozzies for an overnighter

i would create an event page on facebook and link it here but none of you will join it in case of being le doxxxed because youre so important and somebody youve never met actually has any interest in '''''doxxxing'''' you xxDDDDD

suffice to say, doxxing is people knowing your address not your facebook

I'm not arguing that. The stuff was first imported in from Portugal, or maybe Spain, and it had marmalade written on it, that's the story. Could be wrong but it's a nice story.

if you lads want you can come round to my 2 bedroom flat and we can rip some made juul and listen to trap music after watching the cricket

no fuck that. watching cricket is for brainlets. i want to go to the pub and do loads of bongo

Ill join because i deleted my facebook and only have a secret account with 0 friends that I use for messenger only

HIGHLIGHTS UP NOW

youtube.com/watch?v=HERIUM2PbkY

what date we thinking then for the official /cric/ brit meet? im thinking a weekend in early october before it gets too cold

I mean if you're really serious about wanting to arrange a meet the way they do it on other boards now is via Disc-rd.
Just saying because I'd never go personally, just if you want to maximise the amount of people who would go.

youre down out here

KEK I was just joking, lad.

Doesn't your granny make jam? Mine does ... or used to :(
It's got mangoes and apples and oranges. I'd fight any man on Earth for it. Who cares where the name comes from!

I'd be up for making an account there but one thing is for sure and that is I'm not adding some random cunt from here on Facebook.

The issue with using Facebook is Sebbo will find your account and use it to blackmail you

>Don Bradman average- 99.94
>Steve Smith average- 64.95
Reckon a few more Ashes series and Smith could easily get into the high 70s.

im not using fucking discord because in not a virgin

my birthday is on halloween so it would be nice to see you lads maybe the day before so i can see my mates on my actual birthday

One of my grannies makes berry jams from different berries, and it's excellent.
You're alright mate.
We make jams from fruits which grow in summer and then we can use the jam through the winter, that's the idea anyway but mostly now I just buy jam whenever from the supermarket.

whatever. its not gonna happen. not gonna put the effort in my own for like two people to turn up

>a-add me on facebook or you're a virgin!!
yeah I'm fine cheers mate, have a nice meet with yourself though

i didnt say add me on kikebook
i said i would post an event page here

nobody is gonna turn up lad lol

If you lads are serious start a group chat on something so you can talk a bit before
Would be weird as fuck going without all talking as a group a bit before

Just come to the next test at Malahide and I'll post which pub we're meeting at. Won't be until next summer but it'll be grand, sure I'll just post whereabouts in said pub is the English table and make friends with whomever wants to sit with and nobody mentions Yea Forums, thus protecting anonymity.

yeah i know that you prick, was just throwing the idea around

Bet I could cause you all some severe emotional damage with my quick wit irl

Feel free to give us a showcase of your wit against the Aussies tomorrow mate

ive met 4channers before from an /fa/ brit group and overall its been positive experiences

haha bet they feel silly picking a captain who isn't good at cricket or being captain thus gifting away the best opportunity they've had at winning in England for a generation haha lol boom roasted

this was an /fa/ meet in plovdiv, bulgaria

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looking good zach

The benefit of meeting at a county game is the ground will be largely empty apart from a few autist weirdos, though that will make it difficult to spot the lads from /cric/

which county game would you recommend

/britfeel/ had a few meets
Have a feeling a /cric/ meet would be similar to one of those

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deano sold me this peng jacket for 20 off ebay
its literally so peng its worth about 200

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yeah dont reckon most of /cric/ are that into drinking and stuff

don't you have crippling depression to be dealing with instead of blogposting zachy?

whiskey and hamburgers wouldn't be appropriate for probably two-thirds of uk flags lmao, something to consider in the spirit of inclusiveness

lol when i have ever gave the impression im particularly depressed. im quite high energy ultimately and thankful for what i have . u must be a newbie

for zachyman depression is too self centered
ill never surrender, theres a halogen inside me, im a mover and i expect nobodys sympathy

Yeah man, local cricket is genuinely a thing here. Even if it is mostly subcontinental expats.

I think that may actually be why they like Arizona so much. The pitch conditions are probably really reminiscent of home.

i guess it helps that my mum is rich but still i'm HIGH ENERGY and always be HIGH ENERGY

294 looking pretty bloody good right now

pavement
tool

goooodbye horses

Any grounds with very green grass but surrounded by desert, like the golf courses?

Correct order

england is mine and it deserves me a living

You are England

>The Duckworth Lewis Method are an Irish pop group formed by Neil Hannon of The Divine Comedy and Thomas Walsh of Pugwash. The Duckworth Lewis Method is also the title of the group's first album, which was released on 3 July 2009, a few days before the start of the 2009 Ashes series.
>A concept album about cricket, the album has 12 tracks, one of which is an instrumental. The album was mixed and recorded in Dublin and was mastered at Abbey Road Studios.

Is this THE /cric/ album? I've only ever heard the tracks he did for Father Ted (main theme, My Lovely Horse) mind.

I'd go to your meet-up Zachy.

Depends
Did Tool do a song about cricket

its shit though lad
the official /cric/ album is permanent sleep by lowlife

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youtu.be/Jf0iy6cgRE4

This lads.

Right here.

This is the /cric/ single.

Jiggery Pokery is great

So S****'s posting under the union jack now. Grim stuff. There are only so many flags a man can filter. Would hate to miss out on Zach's streams of consciousness.

>Sgt. Yankee in his baseball cap
>Throwing curveballs all over the map
>It's not right, it's not cricket!
Okay lads. Based.

this is the /cric/ single

Yes
No, and Tool suck
It's ok, why not have official albums?

Got this downloaded weirdly, will listen tomorrow.

Alright I will download it. Looks like there's a follow-up album now too.

More like a follow-on album eh lads?

imagine all those lads dancing are the various gentlemen of /cric/

can somone please post the shane watson- Guess who is sick and tired of suffering under this capitalist death machine of exploitation and oppression. Guess who has cracked under the brunt of monetised dehumanisation. This body is merely a commodified vessel of flesh and bone I have become numb with pure resentment pic

Oh, you!

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Sebbo is posting in /rug/ on a NZ proxy for the duration of the rwc.

Flags were a mistake

youtube.com/watch?v=zoMu2iiQ1ss

so true
imagine if nobody could tell it was sebbo posting

Playing cricket on train tracks seems like a poor idea 2bqh

who is the toby of world cricket?

Lyon is the biggest cunt on the pitch after Warner.

youtu.be/t3JA-417V_M

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What's the Australian for 'perro caca'?

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狗吃屎

Cricket Australia are punishing failing Warner by refusing to drop him down the order.
This is a far more humiliating experience than a lifetime ban, because millions are watching and judging.

sam curran should be played as much as possible , as left arm swing is always threatening especially when you have big strong right armed bounce bowlers at the other end
jason roy should be executed at the tower of london
joe root should not be captain
johnny bairstow should be englands number 3
jack leach should be dropped and a spinner from nepal should be robbed

Business idea: Roy to 9th, Leach 10th

Colombia rising

this is why i need to open the first american cricket sports book
get absolute cazzies to put the house on a test match, and it draws

lol what a nonce

Curran bowled nicely today and his best asset is he isn't afraid of the Australians.
Archer was great today too, he doesn't know yet that he should be afraid.

>his best asset is he isn't afraid of the Australians
This means we have 3 players who aren't afraid of the Aussies - Curran, Stokes & Leach.
Something to build on!

I hope the Aussies don't start bullying qt Curran. He seems a delicate flower

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curran is definitely one to keep around
bin off root as captain for sure, not just because I can't stand him, but because he's not got the leadership skills desu
i'm in for the long-term rebuild for the test team desu. let it marinate and let's do it properly

I ran a book on the rugby when at school, it's the only way to gamble.

no finer sport in the world than cricket desu
love t20s, one day, tests and ice cricket

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Excuse me that's cultural appropriation.

fucking based
do you just use published odds?

business idea: a /cric/ podcast

I used points spreads for head to head, which I fudged depending on my fellow students propensity to bet on their favourite team, and had a pick the winners of the round with a jackpot prize for when someone picked all the winners that week.

How many hosts would it have

youtube.com/watch?v=su_fep2iARQ

desu just want to watch the cric with red velvet simple as

more paul adams
less ashley giles
more ian bishop
less michael holding
more bob willis
less ian botham
more gary ballance
less joe root

depends on whether you think sebbo, eirebbo, huebbo, zachy and joshy are all one person

fuck im so handsome

there's two Irish they cannot both be Sebbo unless he bought a pass

reckon rajibul would be the best host desu

franklyn rose

thinking about blaposter
youtube.com/watch?v=Y15aYaQC1UQ

Try to avoid playing a crap shot at a short ball in the second innings Rory.

swanny you retired midway through an ashes series to keep your test bowling average a 0.04 shade under 30, nobody cares what you have to say

based KP

Brexit looms

youtube.com/watch?v=03hC_Ml8aAM

you now remember this song

>The daily bashing of Prince Harry & Megan is now becoming tiresome!
They’re a young family & should actually just be left alone!
>Let them live THEIR life. No one here on twitter knows what’s it’s like to be THEM!
>NO ONE!!!!!!
>SO LEAVE THEM ALONE!!!!
Is KP big brain?

Good morning mate

>pozztralia
yikers

Reviewing new music is a much bigger job than you might expect, especially for those of us with a family. So, I’m very pleased to announce that Daniel Hay, known to some as The 10th Doctor of Prog, will be collaborating with me in 2016. We both feel like it will be beneficial to us to join forces here. You’ll see Daniel reviewing and possibly interviewing as well. He’ll be a great help to Justin and I, and hopefully we will be a help to him, as well. I know that we definitely need a bit more cynicism around here, too. Anyways, here is a little bit about him.

“I am a 19-year-old mechanical engineering student from the distant island colony on the other side of the world known as New Zealand. I have been a big fan of progressive music since I was 14, and have been writing reviews since I was 16, on my own progressive music Facebook blog called The Exoskeletal Junction (formerly known from 2012-15 as The 10th Doctor of Prog).

Outside of reviewing, I spend an unnecessarily large amount of time watching cricket (the progressive rock of sports), and have my own band called The Dark Third.

Some of my favourite artists include Porcupine Tree, Anathema, Alcest, Opeth, Leprous and Marillion.

wish i didn't

you now remember THIS song
youtube.com/watch?v=I7UvbwCjXUk

>gets paid by the government for being born in the royal family

You now remember your Dad playing this song
youtube.com/watch?v=Ak_MTXQALa0

business idea: a high-octane cricket highlights package soundtracked by bomfunk mc's seminal early 00s hit "freestyler"

business idea: international grade cricket

Replace freestyler with Dont Stop (Wiggle Wiggle) by the Outhere Brothers, and you might just have something

very based desu

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kek
who the fuck waits until he gets married to build a computer?

Business idea: T20000 with unlimited wickets.

business idea: timeless first class cricket

We’ll have a bowl mate

need more mavericks in the game of cricket pushing the boundaries and standing out as an individual, refusing to bow to tradition

someone come in here and collect this fucking kiwi PLEASE

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Can we admit Paine is useless and has been made to look good by individual player performances that have nothing to do with his 'strategy'

this
not even been the worst captain this series though which is a damning indictment of root

I DONT LIEK CRIKET

Attached: boris petition.png (698x977, 105K)

Good morning Aussies
What form of punishment do you support for Tim Paine

Good morning lads,

It’s Saturday, might cook myself up a Full English Brexit

Hope England burns

why are you even in /hoc/. your country doesn't even play ice hockey. if you are so desperate to interact with people online, find a chatroom.

they were at the ice hockey world championship tournament earlier this year and they've a pro league. Who cares anyway, I watch the nfl and I've never seen a live match or even been to America

that is called being a plastic.

fuck you, I've been playing madden since I was like 10.

/nrl/ is up

Dead game
Dead poomunity
Sbs wogball tier

>manlet
>snake shoulders
>literal child
How is Curran so good?

oh fair enough then

it's a good sport and deserves more popularity on here

You can't force people to like poo

worked in america

English players with undying belief
Archer
Stokes
Curran
Burns
Buttler
Leach
Broad

English players who suck cock
Root
Bairstow

English players who are run of the mill
Woakes
Buttler(possible elevation to undying belief)

*Denly run of the mill

I have to go to Bunnings and by new line for the clothelines and fucking string it all through, what a pain in the ass

Have to replace a primer bulb on a stihl fs90 brush cutter. Carb and housing has bolts, torx and Philips. Thinking whoever made these was having a giggle.

recommend watching AvE's tool reviews, guy always tears into the manufacturers for bullshit like that

should make a sitcom about our batting
1 and a half men

puzzling lack of hatred for Paine from the Aussies i know

Le 50 and out man isn't the best captain and he's no Smith or Kohli but I wouldn't accuse him of having no belief. His body language isn't what you want, though.

i love tim paine like a brother

T.Paine retained the Ashes

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He did absolutely everything he could to prevent that from happening

Really enjoyed yoga mornings in Bali. Hard to find a decent yoga instructor around here..

#elitehonesty

Last Australian to captain an Ashes series win in England was Waugh in 2001. Neither Ponting nor Smith could manage it.

thinking of marrying and having kids with a kiwi woman so my kids are half kiwi mutts and get them to play cricket for australia so we dont end up being forced to have any more south african or paki terrorists playing for us.

all we need is my half kiwi kids and the marsh dynasty.

kiwi women are hard work mate. doubt you could handle one.

Doubt you have the necessary genetics to create an elite athlete, or even attract a kiwi woman

With even a halfway decent captain you'd have won 4-0
Instead you're retaining in the most underwhelming way possible thanks to his incompetence

@95428169
@95428188
oh sweet summer children

>you'd
>you're

Its spring you dunce

>kiwi banter

archive.4plebs.org/sp/thread/89115719/#89115735

This is what Josh looks like.

of all the Yea Forums gimmicks this is the worst
yes, you and we when talking about teams is fine. it doesn't imply you're actually a part of said team

I'm not Australian you fucking retard.

okay yes i agree i am stupid but also get different flags for fuck sake

Holy mother of chads!
Shall be locking up my women when Joshy’s about.

only technically

We tried. Boomers voted No.

And only because of a monumental historical failure of the kiwis to join the Commonwealth of Australia

youtu.be/o68RjNum89c

I voted Red Peak.

Attached: Red Peak.jpg (480x241, 9K)

Yikes and cringe

Based boomers all the proposed flags are utterly grim

didnt really want you to post my pic but whatever.

Another Friday night at home trying to wind strangers up on the internet ay fatguts?
What a fulfilling life.

So true.
NZ should’ve joined Aus when they had the chance. Would’ve made all this flag and gun cringe academic.
Aus even gave the maoris the right to vote to sweeten the deal for them. Imagine actually making that kind of concession and then the Kiwis still refused.

yeah they were pretty shit. lazer kiwi and nyan kiwi were clearly the picks of the bunch.
your gfs a bit of an uggo though m8, has to be said.

Based self-winding seething peewee at it again lads.

Imagine actually giving a shit about the treaty of waitangi lads

that was just a fan.

forgot pic

Attached: kiwi-flags2.jpg (1259x472, 68K)

Well, looks like its gonna be a Sharks vs Easts grand final. Cant say im surprised

looked pretty cosy to me mate.

I'll start, 13

Attached: kiwi-flegs.jpg (620x1544, 89K)

Me too mate

desu the one on the left but with the red stars (Southern Corss?) would be pretty nice
This one is kinda cool

Attached: NZ_flag_design_Black_Jack_by_Mike_Davison.jpg (800x400, 31K)

this

>a big fat fern, a koru and red peak was the best we could manage

Here you go mate

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12 might’ve been tolerable.

gotta give the ladies what they want

And yet she’s holding hands with the Maori. Mother of god the antipodes are cringe,

It's still got the Union Jack. No point in changing it.

LADS
LADS
LADS

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I thought Joshy was that roid wog from the gym selfie

Nice though. I didn't get to NZ but I'm desperate to go to Dunedin and see some rugby inside that big huge greenhouse they built there, and Queenstown looks good, and I met a couple of bros from Bluff I want to go there and try their oysters.

freshie UK flags are a lil cringe

all freshies are cringe

cant beat the ol deep blue

Attached: 2000px-Flag_of_New_Zealand.svg[1].png (2000x1000, 40K)

Just finished the clothesline, 2 hours it took including the trip to Bunnings, first thing I did was get the 70 metres of line all tangled to the fuck and had to untangle it all.

My flag submission was rejected.

Attached: 22.jpg (732x424, 92K)

I was OK with this one. I like it.

But yeh the original was the best at the end of the day. Nothing better was offered.

Attached: 1568427163417.png (1701x1000, 34K)

*salutes*

like this or the same but with red stars I could get behind
there's one like this but the fern is too big and the stars are different
It's a nice flag but it does make you look like an overseas territory

Attached: Untitled.png (800x401, 19K)

why would you have an australian dessert on your flag...

all UK flags are cunts until proven NI, Welsh, Scottish, or decent human beings.
Don't you remember your first day? It's tough, trying to fit in but not knowing what to say. Be patient with them, today's freshie is tomorrow's legend.

*does a haka*

too close to our sports flag

I'd vote for this

But your sports flag is really nice and better than your actual flag

he's talking about you you dull cunt.

Honestly the new NZ flag should’ve been a southern cross of red rugby balls with white borders on a blue field.

how about this, just whipped it up

Attached: 1568427163417.jpg (1701x1021, 110K)

jerusalem the black

Just don't associate green with New Zealand
Black white red blue only I reckon

find myself spending a lot more time here now since /pol/ turned to absolute shit

green blue and white OOZES NZ mate

Putting one of the southern cross stars on what looks like the ground seems stupid.

Not feeling it
Without the stars I'm thinking central American country

that's good. You can run off the freshies.

>since /pol/ turned to absolute shit

Attached: whatever you say bub.jpg (300x300, 15K)

Looks like he's taking a selfie.

the green is the land, the white the long cloud (aotearoa) and the blue sky. Alternately, the land, the coast, the ocean from plane view. please like my flag.

>part of a constellation superimposed over the land
Just
Not
Feeling it

I think it's a very nice flag but it's just not right for New Zealand and maybe it should try meeting other nations with insecurities about it's international image

Any other Aussies, poms or kiwis have an opinion on my flag? I spent at least a couple of minutes on it, and the pommy lad has me riddled with self-doubt.

apparently pewdiepie is anti semitic

On reflection if Sebbo doesn't like it surely it has some merit

i like it. i like the flag mate.

youtube.com/watch?v=Kfivm4Ct88E
thread theme

> getting rid of the union jack
it represents you being the legacy of the British empire (people living in Britain itself aren't, they're the ones that stayed home), not subservience to contemporary Britain. You have as much reason to have the Union Jack as Britain.
Removing it is retarded and a move to rewrite history.
The flag will remain unchanged even after republicanism.

new

...

>Removing it is retarded and a move to rewrite history.
Honestly these are the sine quibus non of the kiwi mind.

...

not a fan

i agree with the pom that green doesnt suit us

Looks like a fucking Heineken flag mate