/cric/ 5th test looms

*inhales*
GRERG

making some utterly unlistenable wank in VCV rack

Attached: Capture-strokes goatee.jpg (1895x953, 392K)

Just donated $21 to Golden Casket.

Your bum is a net importer of tranny cock

youtu.be/ijNKAdBh9TI

OHHHHHHHH STICK IT UP MY ARSE

thinking i need to coom before the match starts

cant believe they actually blew up the twin towers

Wank? Or sex with your missus?

here we go lads

Attached: The ultimate dot ball.webm (1324x1080, 1.68M)

sex with your missus

Attached: jesus.jpg (480x751, 65K)

direland BTFO

>/pol/

Attached: 1567018253379.gif (800x371, 193K)

Based iggsposter

Just posted my dick on /adv/ lads.

so hyped for this match. we can draw level in the series. still lots riding on this one. no such thing as a dead rubber

Attached: 1423100768953.jpg (251x242, 11K)

the boys lookin aesthetic ngl

your post and your frog picture are saying 2 differnt things

Really want an aus training jersey looks effay

>/cric/

Attached: 1 copy 3.jpg (804x405, 165K)

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS CUNT

no I'm serious. this is arguably the most important test in the series. by denying australia the series win, we have basically won the series ourselves

Attached: 1475585313633.jpg (647x495, 46K)

>we'll have a bowl
>we have brought in Mitchell Marsh

Attached: srgbw.jpg (125x91, 2K)

>yeah we'll have a bowl thanks

tim 'the braine' paine knows what he's doing. this england side couldn't post 400 on a pitch sanded down to total flatness. cheeky 130 all out first innings, bat long, and bowl em out again for 120. it's actually quality tactics.if england are still batting by the end of the day I will cut my dick off on camera.

Predicting a draw.

Anyone want to make a sig/ avatar bet?

vocaroo.com/i/s0Bam0yYd9qr

The missus just sent me a sexy snap lads. What do you reckon?

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>yeah we'll have a bowl thanks

Attached: 1563996340160.jpg (400x554, 39K)

>Driving home from Uni yesterday
>Saw Ben Hilfenhaus on the sidewalk
>Today drove to friends house in upper Sandy Bay
>Saw Hilfenhaus again
>Not even the first time this year
I swear to good if I see this cunt again I'll run the fucker down.
>Say Ben Hi

Lads, it's England. Picking actual batsman is smol brain

was that the ponting decision of edgbaston 2005? has tim paine thrown away the advantage in this still very much alive series? will there be aussie tears by the end of this test? yes they will lift the urn, but after a drawn series... i think it will be the australians who ultimately finish the series with their head in their hands wondering what could have been.

No chance for a smudge 304 now.

friendly reminder ivan genuinely thinks he looks like bautista

Dayum. She cute.

based Ivan

predicting sam curran to be at the crease by midday.

Big fan of Ben 'In Da' Hilfenhaus

Does anyone else think that frosted blond tips is going to come roaring back into fashion?

bit soon i reckon

better than autista ay Joshy lol

predicting england to lose by an innings and for joe root to conclude we just lost the key moments

Attached: 1A3ECD6754CF4807BB80DC7AC9BECF57.jpg (1080x1283, 308K)

might ask her father if i could court her

just stop. you are like a fly. annoying.

>NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! YOU CAN'T JUST HAVE A BOWL!

Attached: 3B0453C14CBD47D8ACEAC652CBE5EBAE.jpg (785x731, 101K)

Been in a coma the past couple of weeks, have Australia won ANY games this series. Can't imagine aus will win the series let alone retain the Ashes, right?

touched a nerve clearly.
your 'tism tingling m8?

mum asked me to do the dishes because she's tired and i said no lol

if you take away the matches australia have won, they have failed to win a single test this series.

post more porn joshy

she looks like she exclusively fucks black guys

this is someones daughter

>Mother asked me to made dinner for the family cause everyone at work.
Hope everyone likes cheese sandwiches

don't be a shithead mate.

Backing a Wade 100(80)*

KEK

KEK

KEK

that is indeed how reproduction works

How can you be sure

This will forever be known as the Sammy Curran Test.

I have had consensual sex more than 1000 times

for having the dubious honour of being the first player to go 0-200 and score a pair in the same test

I knew all the shit maymays and unfunny posters came from /nrl/.

Fucking this tranny tonight, lads.

Attached: IMG_6792.jpg (1280x960, 223K)

I've had consensual sex as many times as New Zealand have won the cricket World cup

bit gay

>Fucking this man tonight, lads
Fixed

>Australia bowling
Feeling a bit robbed. I wanted to watch Warner get out for a

shan't be watching this dead rubber meme match

once?

Dubs and pic related will single-handedly win the game.

Attached: 20150204035405.jpg (392x416, 34K)

you shouldn't have to wait very long

If the series is drawn then we should split the ashes in the name of friendship.

>we need another bowler, bring in MMarsh
>oh but we'll also bring in a literal workhorse in Siddle lol

Post team of the series:
Burns
Denly
Labuschagne
Smith
Stokes
?? (wk)
S. Curran
Cummins
Siddle
Lyon
Hazlewood

Mitchell Marsh is a batting all-rounder.

Paine retain.

About 3.30 this afternoon I'd say

the team of the series is Australia

He's been brought in for his bowling

This is the post

Last digit of my post is the over of the first wicket

>thats why every 15 minutes, someone finds love on e-harmony

i highly doubt the veracity of this claim

england have the moral victory

In what world is Bairstow over Paine

based six-fold improvement

Who would've reacted better after that LBW wasn't given at Headingly if they were captain, Ponting or Clarke?

Nice Denners

So this is "The" Oval eh?

even if bairstow had outbatted paine (he didn't) you would still have tim paine in the team as a specialist captain. his acumen is the primary reason aus won this series.

>stokes is now batting at 4
are England minnows in tests? the absolute state of this batting lineup

what's the coward joe root thinking right now

>turn on telly
>see a wicket
>its a replay from last mtach

Somewhat doubt all of these sorts of ads.

Attached: elitesingles.jpg (1920x1080, 523K)

How does one become Elite?

>Original quote from
Weasel wording

I think this team would be nicely rounded off by
>Carey (wk)

michael vaughan says england have to bat well.. I absolutely agree with him and I don't know why they haven't tried that yet

I wish

>32
old hag

>Australia chose to bowl
theyre just rubbing it in now

Team of the Series
Warner
Bancroft
Root (c)
Roy
Bairstpw
Wade
Buttler (wk)
Overton
Archer
Leach
Anderson

Yep this is the team

if you're going to put roy in the joke team of the series obviously he should open

Can't argue with any of these.

us too

For me its Hazelwood putting both arms out as he follows thru on a great delivery

But Bancroft was our best opener

I need at least three opening slots.

So how do you manage to get dropped after being player of the series against the No.1 test team?

and joel wilson as umpire

if she is so elite then why is she single?

root got a new toy, the Savage House Nigger Jofra Archer

And yet...

thanks for the support buddy, but I was talking about the world cup

Harris or Khawaja should be there before him

I added some layers to an ongoing painting then decanted my fridge as my new one is due to arrive in a few hours.

Harris' average is marginally higher than Bancroft's.

BASED MMARSH

based mmarsh

BASED marsh
would have been 4 if head were in

Moeen Ali in for Leach, drop Overton and Archer down a place.

Based marsh never doubted him

marsh family out in force today

twitter.com/ICC/status/1172088830427639809

Bancroft face 3x as many deliveries at least
He wasn't that far off and actually took the shine off the ball

Someone redpill me on why we elected to bowl

Homma if you wouldnt

>Jonathan Agnew: You can tell when it's overcast at The Oval because you can't see the aeroplanes, which always fly over on their way to Heathrow.
I can usually tell when it's overcast by looking at the sky and seeing clouds

power move

Aus players definetly love Marsh, at Edgbaston saw him giving a pregame talk in the middle of the huddle to the boys and just generally see them being very friendly with him

clouds and england can't bat for shit
still dumb though, the oval is bat first and win the ground

is this the mmarsh redemption arc

fair

i dont fuck anything less than an 7/10

Don't like this
I think its gonig to be one of those ones where every over they'll ltry to leave it and nick it, put their edge out on 5th stump and play and miss twice but never get out somehow

Boo-urns

thats out lads

REVIEW IT

Umpires already cheating for Australia.
Again.

He doesn't have to do anything ever, he still will continue to get picked. He is a disease.

GOOD appeal

Now the marginal one won't go our way

I used to think Marais was based but no

>Wickets... missing???
Even the umpire sounded surprised.

SAME OLD AUSSIES

ALWAYS CHEATING

been in a cooma

The coward Paine wouldn't have reviewed that.

fuark

rigged hawkeye 2bf to the ump. Tennis ball bounce

Burns has a shit haircut. There, I said it.

........but who........... ;)

Rory burns will get out in the next 3 balls or go on to make a 30 chance century again

me hungy
wonder if i should see what deals the hungry jacks add spits out on the shaker thing

You can really feel the absence of Roy

The coward tim paine has not reviewed

That's a 7 you have poor judgment, basically everyone looks like that or worse with basedface or forced basedface as in picture

REVIEW IT

THE COWARD PAINE STRIKES AGAIN!

Attached: isa_guha_20140519_630_630[1].jpg (630x421, 20K)

ummmm

>basically everyone looks like that

stop hanging around uggos

Denleys thighs are like Oak

nah honestly have a man crush on him when he's not doing the actual batting bit

we'll have a bowl thanks

Never seen Tim Paine and Vaati in the same room lads. Think about it.

Sat in front of the television watching the cricket lads (the live stream of Worcestershire vs Glamorgan that is, not this meaningless Ashes nonsense)

...

Facial expression. There are ways you contort your face in which basically everyone looks ordinary. she has great eyes, nice smile, good facial fat distribution, no major flaws, maybe slight forehead. Would get in and not feel ashamed about it whatsoever/10

reckon warnie's success with women comes down to his practice sweet talking umpires into giving him lbw decisions
treat your woman like an umpire lads

this is the relationship advice

HOWZAT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Watching below deck Mediterranean

I fingered that Aesha Scott chick back in uni

>umpire in wc final admitted being wrong
>"but I don't regret my decision"
reckon you're onto something

Attached: Aesha-Scott-Images[1].jpg (750x540, 78K)

So always ask a lady for a middle stump guard?

>success with women
he was in the news for hiring prossies the other day maate

Glad the kiwis have something else to seethe about for the next 30 years finally. The underarm shit was getting tiring.

What changes have been made? Marsh and Siddle in for Head and Starc?

yeah

I think perhaps the real ashes is the friends we made along the way (except irish posters)

don't talk to me unless you're sending us our 1981 benson and hedges world series cup

Head for Siddle and Start for Pattinson

why dont you just check any live score website instead of asking here.

oh lol thought you were asking what changes you would've made

meh shes no hex

Fingered that chick in a nightclub once

Had a look on google but was unsuccessful

I JUST WON $100 MILLION!

foxsports.com.au/cricket/the-ashes/ashes-2019-steve-smith-us-view-fifth-test-the-oval-australia-vs-england/news-story/f0d6f5015c3c03cd359b00355d535b76

AmeriGODS watching our sport, lads.

Give it here

Yeah except my story actually happened

buy me a cric loving ellyseperry lookin GF please

>Aus won the toss
this only confirms the perfidious Aussies have tampered the coin, can’t go one day without cheating

Malfoy

100 million rupiah in bali is like 10k real dollars haha

peter siddle out in the middle

Marsh just got exposed

REVIEW IT YOU PUSSY

Is Rod Marsh still a selector?

jew number on denly's arm???

youtube.com/watch?v=-5BvMAxpq3g

Hi Tim

SMOTH GOD

Smudge bringing the autism to catches

That's right.

ah yes
denly

FUCK ME thought he dropped that

chuck us a durry cunt

>lelny

Highest opening partnership of the series. Unironically.

For me, it's a Poot 0 (1)

>Cummins to Root

Getting sick of this episode.

gollabse lumze :DD

Reckon he'll get 300 this match just to piss everybody off.
Based Mmmmmm.Marsh.

It's so obvious Langer had a go at Timmy for his fucking awful reviews

>captain
>0 (1)

its not really exposed though is it everybody knows whats going to happen

CUMGOD

Root will stand up.
Redemption arc.

Root century incoming

Root 52 (113)

Cummins willl retire with 600 wickets.

The state of Paine's captaincy. Imagine deciding to bowl and letting the opposition get the highest opening partnership of the series.

An actual century or a Root century?

root 53 (141)

I think we're looking at a Root 450* here lads.

>Implying Root will ever convert a 50

root 99 (100)

instagram.com/_courtneystubbs/

Root 420 (69)

Eng 469/9dec

Paying out $1.01 odds on Root scoring 50-99

it's pretty tough, did you hear everyone telling him to go for that LBW that was going over?

Something tells me he's due.
That said, look at Smith. Part of his success recently has to be because he's no longer captain. Smith can just focus on his personal pain and that helps with batting.
Something tells me England should do the same just because they need a strong Root with no distractions and a strong Joe Root with no distractions.

Based sebbo

What's she covering lads?

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Pretty grim desu.

What's the most kino test strike rate?

40

Root will get 100 here, get out for single figures in the second innings, then score between 50-99 in every innings this winter.

59

BBC Ashes combined XI selector has forced me to choose Denly, Paine, and Head in my best XI for the series. It really has been a dire series, apart from for Smith, Cummings, and Stokes.

This is partly why I don't want Smith to ever have to captain Aus again

Honestly could convince me that's a man. The shoulders would make it a bit of a hard sell, but I'm not entirely sure it's not one of those trannies you guys love.

For me, it's a Renshaw 0* (100)

Depends on whether his back holds out.
He'd be near that already if it wasn't for that.

this is root's finest hour
his churchill moment
england will stand still

you are gay

Labuschagne, Hazlegood?

french cricket

looks like the advance hair studio just smeared some black shoe polish on punter's head today

tiddies

John Travolta?

Attached: 4CC75F36-EA57-48C4-8BD8-BB5534049BE2.jpg (645x737, 251K)

Broad too?

fucking kek

kek I was thinking that too, looks like a big blob of grease went on it

How will he be seen? He's got the potential to be our best since McGrath and 3rd best quick ever

Was there a catch where an Australian player in the slips is on the ground and kicks it up with his foot and catches or did I imagine it?

Paine is actually good though

Yeah they've been good too, and obviously made the team. Other than that you've had a couple of average performances from the likes of Archer, Broad, Leach, and Siddle, and that's about it.

Broad's had a fairly good series, nothing special.

The original is a qt.
Especially the crevasse on the chin.

Attached: 1554526140882.png (237x330, 43K)

Someone screenshot, i Missed it

For me it's the hips don't lie but I can't understand the language of these hips therefore am avoiding that in which there is any doubt.

For some reason I reckon this was Darren Lehmann

Would definitely appreciate a wicket shortly lads

Think he'll be more like Harris or Bond, kino stats but not many tests

Reckon those blue wickets are pretty aesthetic

I found one of Warnie's sex workers, lads.
>Moldavian Davina is described on escort websites as a 5ft 2in "pocket rocket"
punterlink.co.uk/greater-london-escort/gems-of-london-city-of-london-escort-agency/davina-edgware-road-escort-978938

Attached: 0001191228.jpg (450x674, 36K)

with head dropped paine is now our 4th best performing batsman

No rates shown, shame.

What score will Englel declare on lads?

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Surely one of the cric lads should root the same girl as Warne

Is it me or do you have to have big ears and boof head to be a good cricketer?
I swear every good cricketer has bigger ears and a bigger forehead than dumbo.

It shows them but the site is iffy, try refreshing

So um, why on earth did we elect to bowl

>£200 incall
Warnie spent too much, no excuse to go over 150

258

just trying to keep things interesting

shard on the cards

We should all do it.

Cheers, that worked
>Dinner Date -- £700
Perfect.

WE'LL HAVE A BOWL, MATE

based captain reading sun tzu on his kindle last night

Yep, we'll have a bowl thanks

It annoys me how well he's bowling because he's 26, debuted at 18 and yet has hardly played due to that injury.
Could have surpassed McGrath/Lee/Gillespie or even Lillee.

Marnus, Broad, Hazlewood have all been pretty good

>£1500 overnight
wew

>pay £700 for a dinner date
>she orders the lobster

she costs like 600 pounds for a session kek
by that logic MMarsh would be better than Smith

Starc is >our 3rd best

100.
Yolo.

It was this one I was thinking of.

youtube.com/watch?v=DfKaqQz6ueg

yeah, from tubs lad
youtube.com/watch?v=DfKaqQz6ueg

Isnt there some cunt who brags about having a rich family, surely he can take one for the team

Reminder that there have been seven centuries this series shared between 4 players and one of them is Matthew Wade.

youtube.com/watch?v=DfKaqQz6ueg

This it?

Would

Attached: dinner.webm (640x800, 963K)

Smith 3
Stokes 2
Burns 1
Wade 1
?

She's like a hot Betty Draper...

Hilarious how Wade doesn't even register on the top run scorers chart despite the ton
Head was a bit unlucky to get dropped over him

Number of wickets is almost just an indicator of how injury free you were. Headley, Jones, Tremlett were all better bowlers than eg Hoggard

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that was it, thanks m8s

found out its a reading week for uni lads, no needing to study shit tonight or get up for a 9pm tutorial in the middle of the city
feels quite good

Surely one of the cric lads should Root one of Warnie's daughters

>9pm tutorial

grim

got all my assignments done so i can watch cricket

I fuck whores in London, probably fucked a few Warne has done

>by that logic MMarsh would be better than Smith
And he should be, he's just underperformed 2bh. He seems to have a sharp eye and reflexes, the problem is the thing in between his ears or his brain.

Remember when we all used to say "grim"?

>tfw test at 9am tomorrow in the city

>the problem is between 'is ears
classic boycott line

>tfw got a test in england right now

least theres no street shitters

I once fucked warny in the MCG nets once.
It wasn't consensual but hey, he had to or i'd never free his family from my basement.

and a 35 min drive + 10-20 walk because UQ's fucking huge
date crept up on me to put shit in
fuck ouch

Banana man going for 6 an over and now M Marsh bowling.

grim stuff

What do you guys do at uni when it turns to political discussion? I try not to sperg out but I can't help but get mad because they all gang up on me.

not gay, would never be fucked by a man like a poof. would just fuck a man

>the coward joe root
>one of the "big four"
>can't even score runs in front of square
grim

oh, is a captain not allowed to use his bowling options?

cheesy salsa slippery dip

i had to do pol sci stuff
ijust tone it down but also there were some rich kids and a mature age so it ended up being a right wing table and left wing table yelling similarly incoherent shit at each other

no race of "humans" on earth i despise more than street shitters

Why isn't there any pajeets in the side? Surely England has a tonne of them.

I hate how people focus on diversity rather than sheer skill in the media though. Obviously the selectors do not care about that crap, hence why they selected Archer, who probably should be playing for the West Indies and was rightfully selected for dat pace.

>Enland's 27-run opening stand is their highest of the series
Pathetic

Found the other, too.
>Poppy, 27 [...] East European "party girl"
londonescortguide.com/london_escorts/Poppy.197749.htm

Attached: london-escort-282-IMG_1034-5197.jpg (350x505, 96K)

I'm not a kekistani mong so it isn't an issue

No political discussions in my classes. Lucky, because I don't want to reveal my /pol/ level.

anyone else reckon all the other commentators can't stand warnie

see now thats a solid 7/10

i would fuck that

Bit cheaper this one. 8 years older though.

>If it weren’t for Tim Paine systematically undermining his side, Australia would have won this series 4-0

Warne just talked about how weird it was to select Siddle and Marsh as they bowl the same sort of role.
I think this might be Siddle's farewell match perhaps, hence the selection.

I like to think I'm not either but our teacher was a literal communist lesbian so there wasn't much room for fair discussion.

wicket looming lads

>Root
>Big four.
>Ranked 7 in ICC test rankings.
What did (((they))) mean by this.

I get flustered easily and always get btfo

Man I love it in the butt.
I am also victorian.

KEK

England would refuse the ashes if they retained on a drawn series. would aus do the same? Or is all their talk about the spirit of cricket just slogans and empty chat.

eating sausages in bread with a knife and fork

Could hire the both for an overnight test viewing for £2,500. Money well-spent.

How do we know Warnie rooted these two?

based sebby. good to have you back lad.

grim, what courses are you doing
I would just ignore it and mildly humour her if she takes it up to you

It's the highest of the series for either side.

Why do rich people go for prozzies?

hey man
your mouth is a net exporter of bull shit
work on that
x
>sebby
blabla*

thesun.co.uk/news/9832575/shane-warne-loud-foursome-escorts-lover/

are you Greek?

>England would refuse the ashes if they retained on a drawn series.
That's why England are shit. That's advanced cuckery,

nowtolove.com.au/celebrity/celeb-news/shane-warne-sex-scandal-foursome-58098
second doesn't really look like her

Attached: 1567740163054_HERO1.png (640x534, 868K)

no im straight

they cant take half your shit

>uni

Attached: ....jpg (463x456, 43K)

why do they look like cheap cgi

love warnie's rants

think im in love with the one in yellow

give me all her deets

england didn't refuse the ashes after "winning" a drawn final
so what exactly makes you think they would refuse the ashes?

Lefty is hot. Wouldnt fuck righty with a frozen turd

Fuck another hobartian. i might actually know you reeee.

Subie Legacy 3.0R
pros v cons
go!

tons of makeup and photoshopped

*the world cup

Definitely her, just a different photoshoot. Found that exact photo here
eternitygirls.com/escort/32b-brunette-petite-slim-small-natural-tits-viviana-3033

Attached: image00003.jpg (400x600, 50K)

know how we deal with political discussion on the work site? turn up triple m.

Where you at nigger?

The biggest tragedy in English cricket is that county legends like Darryl Mitchell and James Hildreth never even got the opportunity to test themselves at international level. Perhaps if the fraud selectors Ed Smith and James Taylor cared as much about picking a good team as they did about their fashion, then English cricket wouldn't be in such a sorry state.

looks like marsh stopped eating the pies and started delivering them

didn't win lotto lads

Attached: .png (1145x819, 56K)

problematic language itt ngl

FUCK OFF STREET SHITTER

>triple m
exactly the taste one would expect from a work site mong.

you should have tried to win

Bellerive Beach Public Toilet

If there's a virgin ITT willing to lose it Warne's prozzies, I'd donate to your GoFundMe

ummmm..RUDE! x

based cubiclecuck

Why didn't you pick the right numbers? Seems like that would give you a better chance.

im losing it
BWAAAA
duga dung dung
duga dung dung

Not being funny but dont get what youd do all night with girls. For me, like one or two ruts is enough then im done with some fourplay too. blowies etc. I could do the 1 hr option. Max 2 hours with like an hour break in between ruts. if i took 1 hr then id probs do half an hour and demand half the money back.
Also so typical that fucking moldovan. bloody eastern europesn romany gypsies stealing good brit sluts jobs.

ew public toilet

>south african is our best player

well at least hes not a faggot like kp

Why is Labuschagne always chewing?

what do they call the mitch marsh physique? with the narrow, downward sloping shoulders and mass of pecs that look like they're sagging?

>Cubicle
>Work site
Never been ambitious, have you?

the everlasting gobstopper

Are those his pecs or has he got bitch tits?

arrrgh this fucking apple music ad

*labia change

TELL ME ABOUT PAINE!

WHY DOES HE WEAR THE MASK?

The fact that so many books still name Don Bradman as "the greatest or most significant or most influential" batsman ever only tells you how far cricket still is from becoming a serious sport. Baseball analysts have long recognized that the greatest baseball players of all times are Babe Ruth and Willie Mays, who were not the most famous or richest of their times, let alone of all times. Football critics rank the highly controversial Pele over players who were highly popular in courts around Europe. Cricket critics are still blinded by commercial success. Bradman scored more than anyone else (not true, by the way), therefore he must have been the greatest. Baseball critics grow up studying baseball from the past, football critics grow up studying football from the past. Cricket critics are often totally ignorant of the cricket of the past, they barely know the best batsmen. No wonder they will think that Bradman did anything worthy of being saved.

It should be illegal to play the same fucking ad every ad break, I dont give a fuck there should be a limit on it

ya kidding

No-one listened to his tactics before he put on the mask

they're like pecs but without the inner or outer definition
just two clumps in the middle

Attached: Screenshot_20190912-212510_the Lott.jpg (1080x3027, 607K)

England didn't win the third test they wilsoned it so I'll happily consider it a win.

barry check the fusebox

*learns some jazz today*

Hate how """ambitious"""" is now used as a proxy for getting some high-paid but meaningless corporate job. In my day, amition meant actually doing something positive for the world instead of lining your own pockets.

oh shit it jackpotted again

Ball was going down leg mate

no it didn't, shut up

Lately I've been in a life like limbo
Looking out of a smudged up window
We're not sure where our lives are going
Friends, it's summer outside but yet we're snowed in

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So the commentators are saying the pitch is darker, that's probably because the soil may have been basic and not acidic enough, perhaps too much limestone.
Obviously they've added something to increase the acidity right? Makes it greener if you make the soil more PH neutral for the type of turf.

I remember rumours about someone adding salt to the WACA pitch.. that must of fucked that pitch's PH right up.

ohh in my day you could get a train to newcastle for half a thrupney shilling and still have enough for a quality day's entertainment at the penny arcade

chhOOoooOOOOOoon!

send in mmarsh
siddle is cooked

think we just big brained ourselves out of a series win

salt would increase (make higher) the ph, remove moister, and kill grass

fucks sake lads I just made a brew and I've no biscuits in. Gonna pop to the paki shop and pick up some hobnobs, anyone else want owt?

>yeah we'll have a bowl mate

Smith will score 300

This is definitely gonna be Siddle's last tast. Hence why he was selected.

Feels bad man.

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Picked up my herpes medication today lads.

pack of marlboro reds ta mate

Cornetto

Im from worcester originially, and love based mitchell as much as anyone, but he's never really been test level. Hildreth should have had a chance though, more so than Denly

kek when was this

pack of flamin hot monster munch and a kinder bueno please lad

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Benson and Hedges Fine thanks bud

lads....

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What will siddle so in retirement you reckon?

Lord's I believe, just after being btfo and booed off for the 4th time in a row

???

a man, broken.

literally why did they bowl
what the FUCK

Give it time. Tim paines genius will be revealed

ambition has always been a materialistic pursuit
it's why the releasing of ambition is one of the steps in many different culture's spiritual ladders

publish a vegan cookbook and coach the local under 12's

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Starting to think Paine isnt cut out for this captain gig

warner probably talked them into it so he wouldn't get bowled out for a few more hours

Depends. Many Australian soils are actually acidic. Limestone is a basic salt that raises the PH if your soil acidity is killing the grass.
That doesn't make any sense for the WACA though, Perth is built on limestone. No wonder it had a grand canyon by day 3.

If you're this confused, just imagine how confused England are. Paine works on levels incomprehensible to simple man.

To build up hopes before the Smith triple hundred

this Don't make me post Mr T or I might anyway because Mr T is cool

Peter Siddle could bowl all day and not get a wicket.

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Become a county cricketer.

desu with sandgropers one can never really be sure what they were thinking, so long as they know themselves

Pitch is doing things, England is just blessed and not as pressured as last test. Nothing to lost here 2bh. Nobody expects anything.

Getting a bit edgy lads.

wouldn't mind a win personally
let's be honest if we don't do it here it'll be another two or three decades in england

Give some cheap runs to some of the shitters in the batting order, keep them in the England team for another two years. 5d chess here

But I am a groper and I have no idea what the fuck they were thinking. Clear Perth Stadium is not like that pitch too, it actually has variety without having a canyon.

piddle

"Spiritual ladders" are for cultures without the ambition to progress

Can NOT believe sky are rid of Gower and based beefy. Fumin

noNONONNONONO
FUCK
CUNT

>piddle

Going down to bunnings, anyone want anything?

execute siddle

Seriously why are aus still playing a used up old has-been whore like siddle

DROPPED THE ASHES

peter GRIDDLED

Just a packet of Smiths crinkle cut originals mate.

>Marnus Labasedchange

This is getting painful to watch now.
Press F for Siddle.

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hmm

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that was the leach no ball moment
no coming back from this lads root is home and away

why is this old fuck still playing. Out of Pattinson, Starc and Siddle he gets picked. honestly.

t. brainlet atheist

I’ll have a catch from Siddle please

Look at em go once the pressure of a series result is off

Good fielder at 3rd man cheers

Because this is last test.
Clearly that's the only reason why he's in.

If it wasn't meant to then they need to make it so. He was struggling last test he played with the pressure of selection and age.

More like Peter Fiddle heh

>siddle gets sick of people dropping catches off his bowling
>gives them a taste of their own medicine
honestly based

this series is still very much alive. A drawn series would be the ultimate ignominy for australia. they will fly home knowing they did not deserve it. England would have won the moral series

Honestly I think he's looked better than Pattinson and Starc

Ambition put man on the moon.

>If you lose, you win

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a face only a mother could love

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He's shelled it, he's dropped it, he's fumbled, he's fluffed his lines, he's put it down, he's let the chance go begging, he's bottled it, he's fucked it, he couldn't hold on.

Fine, Aus will fly the world cup home and give it to NZ. cause eng didnt deserve that.

Burns looks like an actor, but I can't quite place who it is he looks like.

Starc is fine, the fugg.
Pattinson... is ok, he is having trouble though.
Siddle is nothing like he used to be. Used to be way more reliable and consistent.

Is this lad Chinese or something?

Every person who believes in God is also an atheist

I unironically agree, "retaining" the ashes is stupid.

fuck no a draw would be even better than a win

Lose to win mate.

are you blind, he's probably their best looking player

I've a greenskeeper friend from Cumbria on an mmo I play, I'll ask him about this next time I talk to him

How will Warner prepare for Broad?

I unironically disagree, Aus won the ashes last series, England aren't good enough to take it back

found the wog

>Starc is fine
stopped reading here, don't waste my time cazzie

oh dear, caught in a web of his own construction. a comprehensive intellectual takedown

how did the rotating bowlers meme return anyway? i thought we learned it was dogshit and scrapped it after experimenting with it around the 2000's

k lad

You'd have failed to come what you came for - the first win in England since 2001. Everyone gets the ashes these days that little urn is meaningless.

Plus people will just say England would have won 3-2 if 2nd test went on a session longer.

>dropstralia

>they will fly home knowing they did not deserve it.
But we haven't retained the ashes since 2001 though.

>t. paine

grim grim grim grim grim grim GRIM

FUCK OFFFFFF

Why don't they just catch the ball?

Root has Vaseline on his bat

fuck it im off

imagine being tim paine right now
reckon I would top myself

something something didn't actually win the wc final something something

Dude, he should have been in all of these tests 2bh.
Unlike siddle he needs a test to settle too.

Siddle though... is not like he used to be. He never needed settling in the past.

Last series should have no bearing on this series, draws are so rife in test matches that it skews things.

>in the side for wicket keeping specialty
>drop easy catches

>yeah I'll have that catch mate

Fucking hell lads I'd expect to be getting this amount of (You)s for obvious bait on /pol/. Utterly grim display

need root out of business

I have never seen an Australian test side drop so many catches. Normally that's our strength.
The fuck is going on.

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fuck it just play for the draw, any rain about?

if the series is drawn the ashes should stay in the possession of the queen until a team is good enough to claim them rightfully 2bh.

3/84 now that would actually be par

...

settle down buddy it's only two chances
none at all, going to be a heatwave. grim

if the post just before mine is the new thread, he'll get a 50 but not 100

In the same hour?

Paine is purposefully luring Root into a false sense of security, just you wait he'll spring his trap soon. Masterful captaincy, expect a wicket here soon.

you were ump balled one test

the queen of australia, sucked in loser

Business idea: first team who wins three matches wins the ashes. (Playing however many tests it takes to get there)

of course that's been outdone, the first session hasn't even finished freshcaz

Glad England turned up lads, clearly Australia didn't.

you see if you give root 2 chances now and then actually get him out the third time he'll be mentally shod and scoreless runs in the next ashes which are still contended
very big brained stuff by paine

>yeah we'll have a review for that please mate

Reminder NZ has never won the ICC Test Championship

root and paine should mud wrestle if it's a drawl

BOWLED NATH TONGUE MY TAINT GAZZAAAAAAA

Two guys will make a thread at the same time then report each other

desperate to see him drag it onto his stumps, he's nearly done it once today and almost at least three times in the last test

All root will be able to think about coming out at the gabba is the stolen runs in this test. The bowlers dismissed him, only some ham handed fielding gifted him any subsequent runs. These are coward runs.

Not a bad idea but I think we need a little more danger, perhaps some danger of death, so at least one of us can get a new captain

Ball was going down leg mate

if he was a true man he'd dangle his bat out 20cm from the ball then walk

Why is englands entire middle order composed of people that should be batting at 6 or 7?

...

thunderdome?

Because we got ourselves a side entirely made of meme sloggers to win the WC

Going to bed, 'night lads

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Fuck, totally forgot about that shit.
Why are we playing Siddle?

Pretty gay desu

Now that's based

500