/cric/ - The cricket

where did all the aussie flags go?

Pretty much proof they're cooked by based Burn and Overton (Over-a-ton)

no you

Australia running scared
They know they fucked it with that declaration

I don’t pretend to be anything mate
Denly is playing pretend at being an international test bat which he isn’t

SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH SMITH

I was just fishing for YOUs

>posting in a sebbesity thread
Shan't.

Just finished Postan in yer mum

Just dropped a big steaming davey warner anyone got some TP?

The Coward Joe Root putting a night watchman so he delays having to come out himself

The coward Jason Roy hiding behind the coward Joe Root

The craven Tim Paine running up the score instead of acting like a gentleman and declaring at tea.

BASED trinibbo

nytimes.com/2019/09/04/opinion/east-india-company.html

Ground's only half full in the Brainlet Blast, bet the greedy bastards charged too much for the tickets

That East India Company feel la
>when the Chinese won't buy anything from you so you get their population addicted to opium so they have to buy from you, but people in India start starving to death because you replaced all their food crops with opium, so you double the taxes on the survivors to protect your revenue stream and more start starving to death because they can't afford food, so you stockpile food and sell it at the inflated famine prices and thirty million people die and another hundred million become hopeless drug addicts but it's okay because your revenue kept going up and your stock price didn't fluctuate a penny

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was almost empty at riverside yesterday
looked really depressing

bet it's cus t20 is boring

thank god for the hundred and based english crowds, everyone knows how flakey aussie "crowds" are

Apparently for the important quarter final (Worcestershire vs Sussex) the ground is already sold out - will be fuming if it's not desu, because they could have given any spare tickets to me

Wh*te pe*ple are truly the devil

can someone explain why australian did not declare sooner other than to enable smiths double?
isn't this likely to be another drawn match?

Well yeah, it's fuckin miles away from anyone who would actually want to go and support their teams. As much as they want to overblow as "muh roses rivalry" Headingley would really have been a better option

>declaring in the 1st innings

literally cannot fathom this
>muh evening advantage
literally saying you have no faith in your players

does this shit ever end

they doubt that England will last that long and they’re right

He's gonna look like a right tit if England bat all day and manage to avoid the follow on. Luckily for him this will not happen

2021

Three full days to bowl England out twice? You could do that in three sessions on current form

You can't enforce a follow on with less than a 200 run lead

So this guy comes in, and he announces to the whole thread that all England gotta do is bat all day and avoid the follow on. I'm dying over here

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based protosebbo

I get no respect I tell ya. The other day I was thinking I wanted to make love to my wife, I get to the bedroom and some other guy is already fucking her. I ask 'who's this guy?' She tells me it's a night watchman and I can fuck her in the morning if he's finished.

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reckon the new slipknot album is better than tool's

tool

reckon should bat agressively tomorrow, play their natural game and score around 200 in a session and a half. expecting a series defining 12 from JROY

Attached: download.jpg (239x210, 10K)

meme word count in your post is through the roof I tell ya

There's an Alex Hales shaped hole in our opening batting partnership

Having a slow and constipated Joe Denly, need more fibre

tool are simply dreadful ngl

Never been a fan myself, frankly. Not against them or artists of their ilk, NIN was fine, but never got Tool.
Oh and uh, googly and that.

>"Don Bradman"

Literally who?

Some Kiwi, you don't need to concern yourself about him.

Lol cricket. I am surprised there is no lacrosse thread.

Tool? No thanks, I prefer a perfect circle myself.

Don't watch our sport, you wouldn't understand it.

because lacrosse doesn't have 400 years of nuance and an absolute mountain of statistics that old men and autists drool over
don't forget it's the 2nd most popular sport in the world because of a meme subcontinent

also are there designated shitting ovals?
are there pitches with caked layers of human waste that produces better spin?

>because of a meme subcontinent
The continent of Australia will not appreciate this description of them.

Pavement

thinking about /lax/ lads
might be a good companion thread for /cric/ to replace /hoc/ once /cric/ is demoted to Yea Forums

It shall never be demoted. Let's face it, if fucking fantasy football threads - of both major sorts of football - can exist here, fantasy leagues literally not being a sport in any way, then why not cricket simple as.

based

think smoth runs out of mental energy, and needs to recharge or his autism powers fail. might be worth signing him up to a 'The Hundred (tm)' franchise to grind him out, possibly make a few more meme franchise tournaments to wear him out further. probably would have been better for >us if he was never banned as it's given him chance to fully charge his autism

>SPD Smith: Average in the Ashes 2019- 147.25

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What bothers me about Smith is that he appears to play test like it's an ODI, goes for big shots every time it's even vaguely on, and it actually works. You can't NOT respect that.
It's like all we need a genuine CUNT of a bowler, a McGrath or something, and it will get him out but the current rabble show him a bit too much respect for how he is getting away with it.

In 1937 the England team had a tour of Germany and because Germans didn't really know much about Cricket the British government put some spies into the team to gather intelligence about what was happening in the country

my mistake it was the county cricket team of Worcestershire that toured

reckon we should send ben stokes to beijing, gather some intel and beat up some chinks. reckon he could take 5 at once, minimum

did the British leave any cricket ovals in hong kong?

I love Steve Smith.
No vpn I'm english

yeah, swings early season with the humidity and the pitches tend to flatten out as the summer goes on.

I'm sure they've had buildings erected on them and knocked down by now. Those HK people are serious about land use.

So is he.

I didn't know Kevin Spacey was the goat batsmen

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Fuck off lads

3 weeks till le Bledisloe

just catch it lmao

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the ausgods are waking up roooo

a lot of lessons coming out of this for england
if he gets out of the nervous 140s then hes shown a consistent pattern getting out to reverse sweeps and ramps he has no business playing when he gets past 210

Just about to go to bed actually.

at least we build them some railroads. Greedy little indians

*poos on sebbo and direland*

Sounds based. Just back from the direland v Switzerland game myself. Switzerland bottled that

going to bed soon on the cards

Actually misread that. Though it was poos AND sebbo and direland. What cric should be. But you were just being crude

Surely it’s at least 7am in dingo dingo land
Degenerates

>This autism

nearly 830am and nearly bed time

BASED

Think we'll follow on and then stokes and rain will bail us out.

Absolutely no shame in losing this series to smoth but not after what stokes did and not to Paine

of course you angrily defend sebbo

england wont be getting saved by rain. you will lose 5 wickets before lunch.

>girl i'm waiting for you
>to be by my side
>sharing this moment with me

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The Aussies awake and address every post even vaguely about them and I like this ritual.

really unimpressed with the puerile trolling of eirebbo by ausfailia

cramming for my mid semester lads
wish me luck, starts in 20

>uni
cringe

best of luck mate

good luck :-)

Good luck, hope you achieve all of your dreams.

nobody will hire jumped up student cunts simple as

>NEET
>AMERICAN
cringe, I'd rather kill myself desu

>bbc sport cricket
>those comments
jesus

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griget :D

sleep looms

have fun at work wagecucks lmao

crackhit

>nz play zero cricket until november
ah yes..... based

Pretty brutal blaming archer so much.
England and aus openers have been hopeless and the coward Joe roots captain decisions questionable.
Looks like it's a save your own skin scenario for England and an aussie batting lineup riding the coattails of Smith and lasagne.
Broad and stokes are champions as are the majority of the aussie bowlers.

youtube.com/watch?v=8qt0TyB2MJ4&t=22m55s

hmm meant to skip to 22 mins 55 seconds if you want to see a glorious dismissal

I still believe that Joe Denly can get a magic 150+ score full of lovely front foot drives through extra cover

simply don't want to go to toil

would be grim not having the next 3 weeks off

opinions on the M25 lads?
grim as fuck if i'm elite honest

Uni lad here
beasted it

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.......................................based

why would you have an exam half way through the semester

looking good mate

he's a freshie
they have midterms at some bigger unis

eating pizza

oh my
based

what 'za?

If I had to pick between erasing rose byrne and don bradman from existence then id pick don bradman or desu any other australian.

pizza de macaco

bit racist

'go 'za

mozzarella

It's okay, at least it's lined with trees for the most part, I've seen some yankee freeways which are basically walled in with concrete the entire way.

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could

It's literally one Aussie and one Kiwi, and it's not a problem. There's two Irish on here most days and they think we're the same poster and Sebbo on a proxy.
I'll occasionally use American English spelling to perpetuate the vexation, from time to time, mostly because I don't appreciate them bullying the other Irish user.
I've been on the chanz well longer than those two idiots and they've no idea what is happening to their brains, if they were clever they'd stop worrying about it and post about cricket, as I am doing now by making this analogous with the current English tactic of attempting to bodyline Smith. Australian cricket is well able.

Best way to deal with it is literally to just ignore them, that's all, very simple.

> get ruled by muslim minority for nearly a thousand years
> "yes the whites have taken over, things are looking up"
> literally a famine a decade
you have to feel for poos

fb.com/18429207554/posts/10156525553022555/

Asian cricket gfs flying in boys

instagram.com/p/B2ANz10nvvJ/

Jacob Rees-Mogg is the definition of Mogging

toil begins

idk why but they decided that this subject is split into two topics. our first half was one topic and we had an exam on that. guessing that the end of semester exam is just for the last six weeks

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*farts on sebbo*
heh

>nearly a thousand years
ummm... wat

Off you fuck to work then dick heads

Rose Byrne in X-Men First Class made me diamonds.

I dreamed a dream in time gone by
when hope was high and life worth living

work is for losers

What time is it in goz-stralia?

11:30am in pozbourne lad

same time in Brissy

based sebbo

Not the same time in Brizzle however

I tried reading about this Smith guy and it all sounds like fucking gibberish

you mean gozbourne

>tfw you're at the uni library and realised you've left your earphones at home

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Study in your room dicktaker

original unibro here
you wanna smash

I can't give everything
away

defend this thirdies you literally cant

Declaring near the end of day 2 is pretty standard.

need to buy a desk

Pitch gets worse over time, bowlers were tired, when you've got Starc going at a run a ball it's better to get a quick and massive total now and then you might only have to pile on 100 runs in the next Australian innings before declaring

on the shitter even though I don't have to do a poo

sticking it to toilberg however I can

So lads, how do we fix English cricket and Australian batting?
I say we let England use the technology we made Smith with so they can make more Ben Stokes
As for Australian batting, i say we get another 2 Saffa imports

for me its the alternate timeline where stokes played for nz

Stokes would have shit the bed playing for NZ
It is natural for New Zealanders to shit the bed in any situation, Stokes has yet to because he sees himself as English

Lads i really do think i have a man crush on Adam Gilchrist
Love the man, his keeping, his batting, and his sportsmanship
I just want to see him play again, it hurts so much

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Those are some ugly "women"

Taijul Islam to Asghar Afghan, OUT, GIVES IT AWAY! Oh dear, Asghar Afghan, what have you done? Smart bowling by Taijul Islam, though. Pushed Afghan back with a couple of flat, quick deliveries and then tosses one up. Afghan goes for a wild slog across the line, and can only spoon this up in the air just behind the wicket. Mushfiqur Rahim calls early and takes the catch comfortably. After a superb day of batting, Asghar Afghan has let slip a chance to join Rahmat Shah as a centurion for his team

Big Strong New South Welshman

>missus making chicken don katsu
YASS

any /cric/ lad in?

post a picture

Haloooo (i’m not girl)

based thai women's team already having landed

Yeah ama

England on losing at home watch

going to be a draw as will the next test end

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Holy fuck that's gold

Might have a beverage.

Lloyd?

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>yewwww

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Refuse to believe this

Cricket is not a "sport" it is a simulation of medieval war, as in a war you do not defeat your enemy and claim his lands/women

>yewww

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while his castles(wickets) or soldiers (batsmen) are still standing

>Epping

alright im just gonna say it

cant stand dumplings

come on man what the hell

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smoth

Only 4 batsmen this series are averaging above 30, can you name them all user?

Oh my

Stokes, Smith, Labuschagne. Not sure who’s the 4th one.

Starc?

Starc

The 4th is Rory Burns coming in with 42. I've excluded Starc cause 1. Only played one innings and 2. Hasn't been dismissed.

sebbo-bese

Ah yes, good point

Any cricket on?

Afgh vs Bangbros has been a good match so far.

Mugabe is kill

Rough head rankings
Overton
Bairstow
Leach

they underway?

Tool.

Circular Saw

Footpath.

Blister healed up lads. Cardio on the cards.

can't believe Idi Amin's actually dead

good fucking riddance. burn in hell.

tipping a zimbabwean cricket renaissance
youtu.be/YBnGBb1wg98

>Kpop shitters on my /cric/

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Yup

afghanistan ascending

EH

TWICE

Wonder how England must feel knowing that Smith has another half decade left in the very least, but then there is Labuschagne who hopefully under the guidance of Smith goes on to do the same
Basically gonna be like another 10-15 years of two great batsmen for Aus

watching aghanistan vs bangladesh in bed while the wagies head off to '''''''''contribute to society''''''''''''''''''''''''

>Yamin Ahmadzai to Shadman Islam, OUT, edged, gone! Ahmadzai finds the perfect line, angling across him, and Shadman pokes at one he might have left. There was some swing back in to him in the first few deliveries, but this one held its line, suckering him into a forward push. The ball takes a healthy edge, and it's safely snaffled by a diving Zazai behind the stumps. Good catch, too, as the ball was dipping as it got to him.
I just want to watch this game

mate those tedious insurance forms wont fill themselves out

based

Burns 29
Overton 7
Root 68
Roy 33
Stokes 15
Bairstow 40
Buttler 20
Archer 23
Broad 12
Leach 3 (45)

>archer 23
doubt

>root 68

just had a revelation lads
*ahem*
sebbo is fat

Anyone else coming to the match today? Fosters Party stand sipping smuggled gin in the rain on the cards.

Where can I find stream of the afghanistan game?

try this one mate

*pisses on you*

God I fucking hate kiwis you lot are worthless

seething kek

Keep having very realistic dreams where I wake up, check my phone and the girl I'm grafting on has sent me some flirty messages. I wake up for real and realise they are not there. V annoying.

sorry mate just a joke, here

brazenlyurinatesonyou.com/video/cricket_live/watch.php

send her my picture instead of yours and they'll come flooding in mate

oops meant for

post work drinks dragging me away from the cricket

if you do it in the butt, you can't catch the bug

I think she likes my face mate, we've slept together but I really like her and she gives me minimal communication when we're not in person. Makes it hard to organise stuff. Need to grind out an innings on a low and slow wicket which is fine but these dreams are undermining my efforts

BASED

Morning lads, on the bus

i was just kidding man, I'm sure you're gorgeous

UwU do you want me to post a picture of my feet UwU Cx

Top of the morning to ye lads, I'm a new and interesting /cric/ personality from Ireland of all places. Just to prove I'm Irish, I will now let you know it's morning here in Ireland and I'm on the Irish bus to my Irish workplace. Also based sebbo. Who I am not. Because I'm clearly Irish.

Poor Smith getting bullied by his teammates
>"I walked in and I told the doc - I'm pretty superstitious with different things - I said the stem guards are good to stay now and my arm guard's probably good to stay as well that I wore this game. I got a bit of a laugh from the boys out of that because they know how strange I am."

Based

no you fag

>"I think and visualise before I play where people are likely to bowl to me and where I am likely to score and try to picture fields that are set and play things over in my mind, where I am going to get runs and how they are looking to get me out," Smith said

clearly Irish

Poor for the first time lads, whats the best piss cheap alcohol?

>you will NEVER be an autistic savant cricket batsman
jdimsa

Meths.

You want a picture of my passport? You mean that part with a harp on the front?

Bad bowling mate

fat yak ginger beer is popular with the zoomers

Have heard about that, how much is that normally?

goon

>$350 richer
BASED FUCKING BETGOD

>wake up
>make coffee and head into comfy box room
>Log into 4channel account
>Log onto cric
>Post

old monk

whats that?

try not drinking

dont drink very often but wanted to have a few drinks with the old man watching the pies

This, if you cant afford good booze, dont drink.
Simple

you sound like a methylated spirits man

cant afford bread to soak it thru and im too much of a lightweight to drink it straight

>Wake up
>8:40 am in Ireland when posted

Yeah not buying this sebbo you fat fuck

Why do England start their tests at like 12 PM?

beat the shit out of someone and rob them like a typical pieGOD

embarassed i didnt think of this desu

>Roy 33
Is this balls faced or runs scored?

Tun or Hollandia

I'll take your word for it, you're clearly Irish.

what's that booze they make in Africa by fermenting poo?

new swans is lit

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is that what Yea Forums told you

Sent my gf and my side girl a video of me wanking.

what are these?

Burns 87
Denly 4
Overton 30
Root 110
Roy 230*
Stokes 47
Bairstow 8
Buttler 22
Archer 14
Broad 5
Leach 15

just received this video of an obese manlet stroking his 2 inch dick lads

Just drink paint thinners. It won't kill you and it's not too terrible tasting.

jenkem
more like a solvent

I'm not sebbo though. How many times do I need to tell you.

Beer @ BWS

Indian rum. Very popular abroad.

do you drink it or huff it

kek

They leave the poo poo out in the sub to ferment then inhale the gases
Can’t imagine it smells very nice

I've never heard of it either, so define "very popular abroad"

Dan Murphy's $3 clean skins
>Hollandia
it's not terrible actually, currently $34 for a carton if you've got a Dan's membership card. Tun is ratshit though

must smell a bit like poo.
that's what I was gonna say.
based clearskin wines.

Not sold in Oceania I think. But popular in Russia and US. Has a cult status here.

Found an Aus flag under my desk at work.

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Best deals for cheap booze is at Aldi

hope we get bowled out twice today so the suffering is over

similar to jenkem I'd imagine

could say it was down under haha

go find the smart cunt who put it there and heem him in front of the whole office

Started working at an international school in Denmark. Co-worker Is scouse. Made half the kids in the school ask me who Ben stokes is after the last test.. posted a picture of Ben stokes in my classroom....
found a big fuck off Aussie flag in the office. It is certainly going up in his room early Monday if things go well.

You should do a Jason Roy on the culprits desk

How'd the Janny application go lads? Some of those questions were pretty tough, and I thought I'd studied pretty hard for it. Not confident at all

should've asked me for help mate, I'm a very persuasive writer.

I'd love to kick Jonny Bairstow in the head. Just take a few steps run up then catch him with the full force of my steel capped toe under his chin, send that little faggot flying through the air.

As he lies on the floor, coughing and wheezing and chocking on his own blood, his jaw a mangled mess of bones detached from the rest of his skull, I stand over him and laugh wickedly. He looks up at me in fear and pain, his eyes searching, begging me for mercy. He finds none. I raise my boot then stomp down, splitting his skull like a melon and finally ending his pathetic life.

bit going on here

reminder that Head has just one fifty and a duck, and yet is the fifth highest scorer for this series overall

I'm expecting approval. I'll then sort cric out once and for all

Also his highest score is 51

andrew dobson dropped his inflation fetish the moment he saw sebbo lads

just watching HLs of Smith's innings lads. incredible stuff.

ballarat r8n2

>Half life

Noice

fuck up idiot.

Runs scored
It is basically a score that gurantees he stays in the team next test

...

Mitch Starc too what a legend

Not going to lie, I fucking love when we drop a massive score of 400 to 500 and then declare. It reminds me of back when we used to regularly do this to teams. God I miss all the legends of the 90s and 00s

Indian spirits are appalling. Feni is moonshine, the 'whisky' like Sterling Reserve is utter shit. The rum is undrinkable (fucking Monk!) Even the lager is terrible with Kingfisher and awful meme strong beers. You can't get decent gin and tonic in the whole country. The waiters do that stupid thing of pouring the gin in the glass, then adding ice cubes on at a time with tongs until you say when.
Worse place to get drunk in the world, and I've got drunk in Saudi Arabia

>You’ve been visited by reliable Craig Overton the English all rounder. Solid defensive batting and a masterful control of your line and length can be yours if you reply with ‘Nice smile Craig’

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holy fuck a complaining pom

>when >we'd get through the openers, Ponting and the Waugh's for less than 250 for once, then fucking Gilchrist would come in and wreck shit, and some bowler would get 50, his highest first class score

Good times, good times

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Holy shit, almost a quater of his innings are centuries

Dark days indeed

Is there any doubt that he’s the second greatest of all time at this point lads

the cricket

I had a dream yesterday when I fell asleep in front of the cricket that we got Smith out by throwing the ball at his wicket when he was autistically jumping in his crease at the moment of impact. Was very disappointed when i awoke to see he’d made his century

Does anyone else wish Bradman didn't exist so we could have proper GOAT debates and discussion like every other sport?

afghanistan lads

>Bradman
>Goat
Freshie, please STFU

Yes I agree

Yeah his statistics seem inflated to say the least

rajibul reckons bangladesh are doing 'very well'

I think he'll go on to be the greatest. Bradman was a bit of a sham anyway

mm yes, cricket in england, mmm good idea, yes

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Reminder that we’re owed a rained out draw

You sound like a pussy lad

Bradman who? The indisputed GOAT is Ashley Giles mate no ones knocking him off his perch

Rain looms.
Fortunately alternate sporting kino is being played tonight: Japan v South Africa in Kumagaya.

It is pretty annoying to have a greatest in a sport who's statistics are so wildly above everyone else that it's practically impossible for any modern players to come close. Like if I was to compare it to Michael Jordan, it's not as if his statistics are utterly peerless in basketball as Bradman's are in cricket

That was the second test lad

Call no man the GOAT until he's finished his career. If his eyes and reactions start going as he gets older could affect how we see him. Remember KP averaged 55 for most of his career but ended up at 47, Ponting and Dravid spent time up at 59-60 too

basedshid khan

I'm hearing from my sources that Root will come in at 8 to preserve the integrity of the batting order. Makes sense given that Roy has to come in at 4 to justify his inclusion in the team.

Kane Williamson.

brainlet post

what is Rakheem Cornwall's role?

Yeah let off for the Aussies there let’s face it

thought mugabe was already dead not gonna lie

that was Mandela

Don't think he's meant to be an all rounder, why would they put him in as the night watchman?

I don't mind there being an immortal legend, makes him seem like king arthur

Joe Denly

all players must be all-rounders or face expulsion

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good lad

i dont think don bradman was that great. he only scored so many runs because he was able to hit the ball into gaps and not get out

comical

Today is a wash out

beating the poms on their home turf to retain the ashes with a pretty rubbish australian squad on the cards

The Aussies are cooked

you cant rate athletes from those eras. they were all part time. like the iceland team that beat england at the euros. only relevant era in sport is from the 90s onwards.

Zoomer post. Smith is 30. When Viv was 30 he was averaging 60 too, but that's not where he ended up

I don't think Dravid was ever that high. Ponting's average hit 60 during the 06/07 Ashes which was more than 100 tests into his career. Smith has only played 66 tests.

Burns 39
Overton 3
Root 15
Roy 28
Stokes 63
Bairstow 40
Buttler 7
Archer 8
Broad 21
Leach 9

dennis lillee and michael holding would be county trundlers today

Nah you’re alright

How many hours of play will we get today?

not a fan of this new gimmick

get ready for a stop start will they won't they, ah fuck it call it stumps, kind of day

Session and a half

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comfy is just a code word for boring desu

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Tbh more gassed for Sussex sharks tonight
Gonna mash Worcestershire into fine paste

they've got nothing on Bairshit

Rattled

guess who isn't allowed to come back to do bbl commentary now

Never liked KP he shouldve fucked off back to his own country
Arrogant tosser

So if Smith were to retire after this series, he would have had a better career than if he went on to win two more Ashes series, but being slightly less dominant with the bat.

very problematic post this

Just checked and Dravid was averaging in the 58s as late as his 105th test. Ponting averaged 60.07 after the 1st innings of his 107th test and was averaging in the 58s as late as his 122nd test.

Dravid 52.31
Ponting 51.85

The rainy/sunny graphic is the worst thing to happen to weather forecasting. Completely useless.

he's your greatest player.

going to gloucestershire's brainlet bash quarter final tomorrow
not too optimistic because we always seem to go out in the quarters, feels like the last time we made it to finals day was back in the era where t20 was still fun and not considered actual cricket

Even his contemporaries like Cook were better

He wasn't even the best player in the England team at the time.

statpadder
oval 2005 and mumbai 2012 were his only good innings and he was dropped twice in the former
shit cunt

you can average whatever you want. what matters is winning matches.

shh

No he wasnt

hehe

drug testing for dole bludgers on the cards

broke: coming out and playing aggressively when the match situation requires
woke: play only one way and protect average in all situations

This is what I mean:
You have to judge a player on his whole career. I remember these same conversations about Ponting, is he the best since Bradman etc, because he was so far ahead of Waugh, Border, Best Chappell etc. Same with KP at his peak, best England bat since Wally Hammond apparently, ended up with a lower average than Boycott

A full strength english cope

Ponting > Smith

boycott did make 151 first class tons

Grim up North

Marcus North

aye

What are you basing this wrong opinion on?

it's ability to trigger people

steve smith has a big block of dairy milk chocolate as a treat for making a hundred
he made peter siddle go and buy it even though he is a vegan and they arent allowed to handle animal products

you have to love the guy

Ponting was the most aesthetic batsman of all-time and the best fielder of his generation.

He could have easily retired with his meme ~60 average.

>it's

based PPSB

ancient gimmick

KEK based autist

he didn't say he 'made' peter siddle get it just that he was the one who went to sainsburys
but I read between the lines

went to coles, was a homeless fella sitting outside
felt bad for him so i bought him a bunch of bananas
he seemed very appreciative

The Veganism section of Siddle's wikipedia is hilarious
>eats 20 bananas a day
>quote from Dennis Lillee about forcing vegetarian indians to eat meat

based siddsy

He played a few years too long. I think he probably felt bad that all the other legends were retiring and felt he had to keep the torch going

Once this patch of rain passes we should be alright for a few hours

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whenever a homeless/druggo cunt asks me for something i just tell them to get a job lmao

True blue aussie behaviour

Bit harsh mate. There's always some outside my local Aldi. But I saw one actually go in and buy some food so I actually felt quite bad. It was a couple of chocolate bars but could have been for thier kids or something. I would have expected them to buy cheap drink

Fuck off rain

Joe Root is just another English captain who's cooked by the pressure

This test should have been in Southampton

With the help of rain I reckon we’ll get to close with Root and Burns still in for a powerful 60/2. I think then we’ll be favourites for a heroic draw

That rain has helped us out of some sticky situations. Shame he can’t travel

What are the odds for a draw rather than Aus winning? I got a bet on Aus winning

Galaxy brain time, courtesy of Shikhar pathak: "We always complain about common sense not applied in cricket. But I think cricket will not be cricket and loose interest if common sense is applied"

2.00

>Mate, I'm going on a banana run later.
>You want anything?

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My gf is getting dicked by another dude right now and will very likely be doing this throughout the weekend lads.

5/6 Aus Win
Evens Draw
So bookies very much think this game is in the balance

Reckon you should fuck off ya slack southern shite

>"You're our Don Bradman"

Jesus yikes

>"You're our Ricky Ponting"

Based

>mate, the sunglasses are supposed to go on the front of your head. That way they shield your eyes from the sun. Look at this cap - you are putting them the opposite side from where they should be

I want the cameras to pan to him as he eats bananas waiting for stuff to do as 12th man

I'm bored

draw a picture and show us

Cricket Idea: Ban England from hosting international games until they change their stupid idea of not starting early

Would you rather get caught shagging Ricky Ponting’s missus when he’s been on the sauce or face a spell from Mitchell Johnson in the nets but he’s off his fucking rocker and thinks you’re Alistair Cook and it’s 13/14 again

>"play" cricket in England
>get rained on

Every time.

The literal and objective power rankings

1. Joe Flacco's Biggest Fuccboi and his petty Roosters trolling
2. That one Manly fan who is actually a western suburbs PPSB and admitted to being a bandwagoning faggot and actually thinks anyone should take his opinions seriously
3. Betting fags
4. Normalcunts talking about normalcuntery in general (betting could be placed here but deserved it's own category)
5. Delusional SC fags who genuinely believe they are elite after a few early season wins - Barba's Pokie Tax in particular who tried samefagging and talking about himself in the third person pretending to be someone else and hyping himself up as a contender in draft league, then despite this pathetic bullshit later claimed to not care about SC
6. That one annoying Sharks fan who keeps posting depressing sad frog shit - 'le feels of being le cronulla fan ;_;'
7. Cheeky Sandow fags
8. Porn reaction image faggot

Power Gap

901. Convict - Not so bad anymore and quite tolerable, though I have given it to him a couple of times when he makes a post I don't like. Still he's not as annoying anymore, but the thing about Convict is these things go in cycles so I have no doubt he will piss me off again in the future.

Power gap

9001. Roosterman - He's actually alright, I've realized he isn't that bad in recent times. He's grown on me a bit in fact. I'd like to formally apologise to him for any psychological harm I may have caused with my constant abuse and harassment. One major reason for coming to this realization is learning that it is actually Fuccboi who makes a majority of those annoying Roosters posts.
9002. Me for obvious reasons. The only literal and objective thinker in /nrl/.

the former

Isn't Ricky a manlet?
How much padding am I allowed against Bitchwide?

Reckon I could take him desu

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the rain has almost passed, give it about 30 minutes to an hour for the ground staff to dick about

I saw Ricky cop a bouncer to his unprotected jaw and he played on like nothing happened
I reckon he’d heem 90% of cric with ease

ok on it

Not him lad, but what do you think?
Do i have a chance at going pro?

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why are thailand women so good at cricket? is it a girls sport in thailand like soccer in US are are they all trannies

It's SEBBO

ur bats look like shovels m8

I really wish I was super wealthy.

SIDDLES HOMELESS ON HIS BIRTHDAY

>knows the weather will turn this into a draw
>throws pies and builds up aussie hope, letting them waste their energy and a pointless innings

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They are all ladyboys m8

think pretty much everyone does m8

I remember Matt Prior creaming a drive directly into Ponting's face in 2009 at the Oval when Ponting decided to field at silly mid off without a helmet. Everyone rushed over to check he was okay and he just spat some blood out and told them to fuck off

No I don't think everyone does.

stop being poor

Yeah but just because he can take a hit doesn't mean he can dish em out, I've taken a few blows myself without too much worry.

ok this is a picture of me getting hit in the face last year batting in the nets

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*ahem*
*tingtingting*
FUCK rain and FUCK England

this thread and the last thread reminds us all of why poorfag public school babbies are scum of western society

stay feral and pleb, PPSB scum

Based and fuckenglishweatherpilled

just ate a whole bag of m&m cookies from coles lads

feeling a bit crook in the guts tttt

>Hello everyone. The Australians are occupying themselves with a rigorous game of Uno in the rooms. Marnus Labuschagne just told Channel 9 that the Uno games have got a bit heated. They never stop being competitive. Labuschagne was telling Channel 9 that he was also working with Shane Warne on his bowling before play yesterday. Specifically adjusting his angle when coming around the wicket to bowl into the rough. He may be needed later in the game here. But there's not much he can do at the moment other than sit and wait, much like all of us.
Also that last part is prettt much a repeat of Smith, gonna be kino when Labuschagne gets in touch with his inner autism

for me, it's the 5 pack of premium(ish) cookies from woolies

I have nothing to base this on really but I’m convinced Punter is hard as fuck even at his current age

randwick r6n4

need Labushagne's head edited onto this

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terrible running from taylor and slats there

not the best choice of shots from boonie there

dw lads Mark Waugh is here to save the day

i enjoy being a cunt at the end of threads for no reason, and no one knows who i was next thread XD

we're in /rug/ lads

In England public schools are for upper class people

Fuck im keen to play some cricket this season

Absolutely devilish.

no one knows who you are in this thread ya dumb cunt, this isn't /pol/

dads watching some wank netflix show like some cooked cunt while i want to watch cricket

i enjoy being a retard at the end of threads for no reason, and no one knows who i was next thread XD

>he doesn't know about the secret IDs

Things England has done that Australia never has:
-cheat to win an ODI against NZ
-depend on rain to win the ashes

any fellow aussies having trouble uploading images? lmao i got an isp ban on uploading images. hopefully it affects others on here so its all worth it lmao.

*dabs on cricket*

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Something about those old score graphics that are kino
Bring them back tbqh

What secret IDs?

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They can tell who I am due to my unique posting style, which I change every thread

The ones showing everyone that you're actually samefagging a conversation with yourself right now

I miss the animated duck that would walk across the screen when a batsman was out for a duck

Pure kino.

im the farmer that will burn his crops just so you cant eat

My isp has still kept the Yea Forums dns ban
Sucks phoneposting from work desu, have to use a dns setter thing

>you now remember that kiwis STILL get triggered about the underarm ball

Is this the kind of thing /cric/ posters get up to during rain delays? Grim.

Don't worry lads, the glorious Manchester weather will save us.

same. i used to jerk off to that duck. fuck i love ducks. sexy little fuckers. hnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggg oouuuhhhhohhoohhoohohho OMG IM COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMINNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG NUOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOHHOHOHHHHHAHHHAHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Underarm bowling at the time was not against the laws of cricket set by the ICC. It was well within the rules to bowl like that.

>create meme format
>don't get all your meme rules in order
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Bit grim this
Hope cricket starts soon

NO

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awful post take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror lad

If England were brave they'd declare when they're 199 behind

following yank recipes is a ballache because they have different names for pretty much every tomato product you can think of
tomato puree becomes tomato paste, passata becomes tomato sauce, it's a minefield out there

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

We are not led by a brave man. we are led by the most yellow-bellied lily-livered chicken-hearted craven sissy the sport has seen

What match is channel 9 showing again
Legit can't remember

Has a deficit declaration ever happened?
Bit curious about what circumstances would lead to such an unusual phenomenon.

OOOOOOOOOOH YOU LITTLE DUCK. YUO LITTTLE SEX FUCKER. COME HERE YOU LITTLE SEXY DUCK. IM GONNA FUCKIN FUCK YOU LITTLE DICK. NUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG COME HERE YOU LITTLE SEXY FUCKER IM COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDFUCKINGDUCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Storm v Cowboys

China vs Czechoslovakia 1676 BC

what's this freak doing

espncricinfo.com/series/8427/scorecard/63953/australia-vs-new-zealand-1st-test-new-zealand-tour-of-australia-2001-02

So what we want is more rain, then a good batting performance at least to avoid the follow on, more rain and force a draw?

Make sure there is enough time for aussies to bat again and get Archer to lash a ball at Smith's head and that's it? Win at the oval easy and it's done. Aussies BTFO

Think the duck poster was hoping he'd get a 'this is the post' but he fucking won't because he's a try hard twat

F

for me, it's S

so true

I want rain to save >us 9 wickets down in the follow on, then Broad does a meme spell at the Oval and England have a wholly undeserved series victory causing sore Australian bottoms for 18 months before we get heemed in Australia again

Once
espncricinfo.com/series/60681/scorecard/63864/south-africa-vs-england-5th-test-england-tour-of-south-africa-1999-00

can we get some autistic numbers on hours lost to rain this series?

Who made the 60 Minutes thread on Yea Forums?

Always said this

post more ducks

>down to your tailenders
>match is going to be a draw anyway
>"Fuck it that'll do, come in boys"
Makes sense.

>game almost entirely rained out
>turn it into a single innings match
Makes sense also.

What a ridiculous field

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>Hours lost: too fucking many

it later turned out the South African captain was matchfixing and was paid for a result iirc
But yeah wish stuff like this happened more often

yeah not bad, did you draw that for mummy to put on the fridge?

love this meme

Why did England name a town after a type of bedding lol?

It's well within the laws for England to allow it to rain too

Yeah lad, she promised me i could touch her milkies

Yeah lad, she promised me i could touch her milkies

How new are you people here? Does no one remember the deficit declaration from Clarke against the Windies and then winning?

New thread.

>watching west indies tours

Grim insight into your life lad.

>He wasn't watching the Sri Lanka/ South Africa match during Perera's century because he has a life
state of you

1How do I do this, with optus, tried the 1.1.1.1 thing and it didnt work