/cric/ Eng v Cunts day 4 Lords

York this ugly cunt already

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=w-rv2BQa2OU
abc.net.au/news/2019-07-17/sa-apprentice-doused-in-flammable-liquid-tribunal-hears/11316822
youtube.com/watch?v=RLYksQvr5zY
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phillip_Hughes
youtube.com/watch?v=ZrQ0VMHK0Ec
youtube.com/watch?v=ikJj4JPgMBc
twitter.com/AnonBabble

36-0

unconvinced that this is the thread

This IS the thread

took long for this thread

cunt looks like ben barba

AGHHHHHHHH JUST BOWL HIM OUT FFS AHHHHHHGHHGGHDHDHDHDGSJSHH

And it'll happen once again
You'll turn to a friend
Someone that understands
And sees through the master plan

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Here you go
youtube.com/watch?v=w-rv2BQa2OU

send smoths and vagene

>tfw remember the news story about pic related
imagine being a beta cuck going into an apprenticeship full of proper men and thinking you know better

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what was it?

>le choker is le best one day player ever

Hhahaha warnie you crack me up!

Here wicket. Look up form computer.
>never Smoth

>le 20 and out man
fuck sake time paine you shit cunt

Classic Tim Paine innings

absolutely cerebral innings from paine, almost root-esque.

>pooaine

Looks like we'll be relying on the bowlers to hang around with Steve Smith yet again

back in 2017
abc.net.au/news/2019-07-17/sa-apprentice-doused-in-flammable-liquid-tribunal-hears/11316822

GONE
NO MATCH FOR THE POWERFUL BRITISH BVLL

Werid how someone like Lance Armstrong gets a life ban for cheating and stripped off all titles and someone like Smith gets welcomed back after a very short ban.

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WHAT'S MY AGE AGAIN
WHERE'S MY ASIAN FRIEND

you think batting legends are made of pure grit, talent and hardwork? think again, kiddo.
every generation has its greats, and the media and the cricketing world needs a timeless cricketing hero to lift the sport, an ambassador who stands above the rest
but the fact is, there are PLENTY of great cricketing talent who all have their strengths and can dominate over an entire team with their skills
so how does one go about creating this one legendary icon, one that can stand apart from the rest?
i will tell you exactly how, my friends.
it's through pure psychological manipulation of everyone involved. the media through its power as an influencer, brainwashes the public and the cricketing world in thinking that this player is unbeatable, CANNOT BE BOWLED OUT, he is TECHNICALLY THE MOST PERFECT PLAYER THERE EVER WAS!
what does this do to the minds of the bowler and opposing teams who are strategizing a way to get him out? OVERTHINKING, and becoming paralyzed when things you and your think-tank have contrived doesn't seem to be working, when the simple answer is to KISS (keep it simple stupid)
you want to get Steven Peter Devereux Smith out? it's quite simple friends, just look at his RIDICULOUS guard and shuffle, and keep bowling a line which is stump to stump. das it.
Steven Peter Devereux Smith is a fraud, a fraud created by the cricketing media. 'nuff said

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dw lads CUMGOD is here

it's more of a disgrace that you get caught doping in cycling that anything else. The Top 20-30 guys have all popped at some point.

can't imagine anything more grim than being a tradie

FUCK OFF CUNT OUT

>British

Have my (You) you cunt

WTF IS WARNEY TALKING ABOUT?

>mentally disabled children

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Smith finally reaches his average

based warnie lads

being an apprentice tradie lad

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>le 63 and out man

Has Steve Smith figured out batting?

CUMGOD

why is jofra so cucked

>Cummins SR of 300
That is it England is done fore

CUMGOD
>CUMGOD
CUMGOD
>CUMGOD
CUMGOD
>CUMGOD
CUMGOD
>CUMGOD

cumGOD

cumGOD winning this one lads

Wanna know how I beat you lads?
I had faith that cumgod would be a god and called it early.

>yfw England so preoccupied with trying to find a way to get Smith out, they forget how to get Cumgod and Co out
Remember Aus batting line up starts at the first bowler in

Archers is COOKED

Mad that Smith attributes his development as a batasman to the time he spent at Worcestershire. Just what is it about that county that turns average players into the world's best? Could it be (dare I say it) the sauce?

stream is at least 3 minutes behind, please bear this in mind when posting, thanks.

Grim

Interested to see how Archer bowls to Pat Cummins lads

GOTTEM
GONE
FUCK OFF SMITH YOU AUTIST

if the first over is anything to go by, then poorly.

steve smith lads

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hoping it stops raining lads

GOT HIM. FUCK OFF SMITH. YOU'RE NO MATCH FOR LEACH YOU UGLY TWAT

Fucking umpball that.

All the streams are dying someone pls gib

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my OC lives on

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England have choked this game away.
They were looking very good to bowling Australia out for very low 100, below the follow on, and now it's looking like they won't even have a first innings lead.

>Patty played for the spin

AHAHAHHAHAHA HE ACTUALLY THOUGHT HE WOULD SPIN IT LADS

yeah lad

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What's the strategy considering there is like 1.5 days left?

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I don't think it was ever looking like that with Smith at the crease.

Shot

The more wickets that fall, the better smithy plays lads

play for a draw

maybe if we were 80-4 with smith out, but as long as smith's in it was never the case

England focusing on trying to get Smith out they let the bowlers all score quick fifties, allowing aus to take a lead of about 150 to bowl out england for about 120 tomorrow

As long Smith is in lad, Aus always in a good postion considering the bowlers can add another 100-200 runs themselves

Smith out next ball

>Yorker still the best ball around

Always though this since a kid, never got this line and length bullshit.

>I'm on smoko so leave me alone

youtube.com/watch?v=RLYksQvr5zY

UNLEASH THE BULL

Broken fucking arm

>She said the apprentice had previously been tied to a ladder with duct tape, had his arms and face covered with silicon and permanent marker and had been locked in a shipping container

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The ball that won the Ashes.

It's grand until the brave batsman charges it full

BLACKED

>smoth dying
ready to drift in to the abyss tbqhwyf

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BROKEN FUCKING ARM

these streams are all gash

oh fuck me

Arm breaker.

Called it

based archer winning us the ashes.

Not watching the rest of the series is smoth is kill 2bh

>can not adequately swing bat to leave balls
>retire on the cards
what is this

Finally England figured out to stop Smith, injure him
just a bit of friendly hazing lad, let them feel as one of the boys

oh fuck me this is grim

race war isn't looking so bad tbqph lads

If you cant beat 'em, hurt 'em

is there literally no depth england wont sink to?

Archer should target his arm next ball

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chats is peak redditcore

BASED ARCHER

Fucking bodyline is back

>bring in a nigger to bully the pure Smoth

kek they playing the leave webm

Might have to agree

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disgusting cheating NIGGER

Smith won't be happy until he breaks his other arm and both legs in the same manner

could have wore that armguard before now you retard cunt

Where's the acestream? All the insect enthusiast streams are shit, who got a good one?

Based Ovie

I'm hoping he stays on and is ok. It's beta behavior to want him out so we have a better chance

wtf, I love redditcore. Do you have a link to the relevant sub thread?

SmItH fAcEs PaCE iN thE nEtS AlL tHe tIMe, aRcHeR wOn'T knOw whAt hIT hiM

SMITH CAN'T HANDLE THE BBC

cheating CUNTS
fuck OFF england

>smith scores a double century with a broken arm and wins the test
absolutely based

Swear to god if he doesn't go next ball he faces

Based hindsight panjeet

smiths on 70 and archer hasn't looked like getting him out once yet you dumb reddit cunt

think of it as reparations whitey

hello r*ddit

He's gonna score a tonne with a broken elbow. Fucking madman

Get ready for a broken fucking arm

B A S E D

>posting the words "broken" and "arm", on /cric/, without "FUCKEN" in between

Do you have no shame lad?

Ouch.

bat for rest of today and 1st session tomorrow, have a crack at englel with a 120-150 lead in damp conditions

Bow it at the cheating cunts face

Yeah, because Smoth's ancestors were plantation owners

>immediately lifted straight over the keeper for four
BASED
A
S
E
D

>britbongs laying on the cheating banter in the first game
>resort to literal bodyline to remove Smith
Why must we compete with actual children?

Smoth 150 on the cards after being incensed by this ape

>straight drive down the ground for four

AHAHAH GET FUCKED NIGGER

Unleash your inhibitors Steve

I'll admit he's based.

I still Wana see if he's human though. Might head to /x/ and ask. His face just doesn't look right

>not even a BROKEN FUCKING ARM can stop Smith
God i love being an Aussie

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If bowlers are allowed to bowl bodyline, what's stopping a batsman from banging it straight to the bowlers legs? Can you just intentionally injure a cunt for trying to be a cunt?

This is turning into a kino battle

yeah, a couple

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hard to hit a ball straight if it's aimed right at your head

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proper express spell this lads

>wait 20 seconds to appeal
yeah you sure seem confident you cunts

oh no

OUT. GOT HIM, GONE.

GONE

GONE GOT HIM FUCK OFF

>no ball
Archer is shook lads, he thought Smoth was done for

>that pooview
KEK
E
K

what the fuck hhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah jesus christ boys

terrible challenges should be 20 penalty runs

OH YOU'RE OUT I'M AFRAID

why the fuck did they review that?

Good review lads

FUCKING LMAO
THE ABSOLUTE STATE OF ENGLEL

AHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

didn't touch fuck all you screeching, cheating cunts

Oh my days are the fielder's restarted. What on Earth Johnny b?

England status: utterly cooked

...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH JOE FUCKING POOT AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

What did we mean by this

>crowd laughing

eternally btfo

THE STATE OF ENGLISH REVIEWS.

NOTHING INSIDE A FOOT OF IT.

[spoiler]There was a noise though.[/spoiler]

HGAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Just like one of my Japanese animes

think there might have been a bit of a gap between bat and ball there, lads

kek england are fucking cooked lads

WORST REVIEW EVER?????

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>hit absolutely nothing
what was that sound then?

>1 slip
>third man

LMAO

absolute stinker by aleem, smashed the cover off that one

>England so shook after Smoth belted Archer for four with a BROKEN FUCKING ARM
God this is so fun

Reminder that the review system is to be used to overturn howlers.
That was England's idea of a howler.

His feet. The sound is definitely what caused them to go upstairs. Absolutely devilish.

absolutely cannot wait to post this whenever someone makes a retarded review

how good is test cricket lads?

Is 96mph fast?

>96.1 mph

>This may actually be one of the worst reviews of all time.
Absolutely scaving from cric info
England are done for

>someone in crowd yelling "BROKEN FUCKEN ARM"
sure there aren't any /cric/ lads at Lord's today?

Archer's mind snapping

Reckon Cummins might've just shat himself.

smitty on 150 watch

Feet

ah yes, we've found a bowler who bowls 90mph+ with genuine skill let's overbowl him lmao

The best part about this is the dead flat snicko

Gripping innit lad

Geez, imagine if that actually was at his head. Would have obliterated his elbow.

like 152km

>Lord's crowd actually cheering and making noise
Today is a fucking weird day lads

So where was the noise from? When he landed? It did sound wooden though.

>96mph
Its 154kph so yeah fast as fuck

>scaving

it's 155kph

>these sudden rash shots - yeh Smoth is hurt, can't stay out there for long and is trying to get as many runs as possible before retiring or getting out

Its orge Australia

I over bowled your mum last night

comfiest sport on the planet

don't you worry, we'll turn him into a proper english bowler, bowling around 85 challenging the outside edge once every 20 balls.

For me, its letting him bowl with the old ball instead of the new

Pacey black lad

>We've probably got atleast another 6 years of Smoth to carry us
Fucking based lads

Classic English tactics lad
Can't have a new bowler overshadow Anderson, so bowl him into injury so Anderson has no issue coming back

it's actually 154.658kph retards

Pretty boring considering two days have been rained out. Would be pretty good if there were still 3 days to go.

leach's head is NOT normal

>tfw going tomorrow

Heard Sue from Teddington is in attendance today.

nothing about leach is normal. disgusting creature

how else are you supposed to fit his big brain in?

So in absolute terms, this autist is literally the best person to ever hold a cricket bat

>calls us retards
>clearly used a converter because he didn't know himself

oh i am laffin

patty six this over lads

who cares cunt replay showed it was clearly not out why are you arguing

Knock off Nathan Lyon desu
Don't like England trying to copy Australia team m8
First Burns to copy Smith
Now Leach to copy Lyon

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leach is trying out the knockoff garry look, pretty grim desu

Bradman would've averaged 300 if he had modern day bats and the boundary rope brought in 30 metres from the fence.

Crack

cumGOD is aesthetic as fuck

possibly the second best

For me, it's bowling 90+ mph with a short run up.

REVIEW IT

CUMGOD

NGUBU MY SON

ridiculous how fucking good steve smith is fuck me

Someone (an English fielder) may be making knicking sounds to try and get the tough Aussie batsmen out.

>smith is going to score a triple ton on england while he has a broken fucken arm
based

Just tuning in. What did I miss?

>trail by 60
That is a siddle innings to get that

Really? I've always just assumed the general standard of play has improved over time

Has a batsman ever preemptively ducked a full ball?

could do with some more tradie work lad

>when out fast bowler bats better to their fast bowler than their fast bowler batted to our fast bowlers

It's little victories that make it test match cricket

smoth has a broken FUCKIN arm

Smoth broken arm
CUMGOD scoring off Archer with no issue
possibly the worst review ever, so desperate
England essentially mentally cooked after they thought they stopped Smith

this is a real mouthful but yeah its true

based dougie

Poms are playing bodyline against Smoth, they're after breaking his fucken arm but he's still smacking boundaries.

Smith GOD on hunnit with one arm watch

smith looks uncomfortable as fuck, i reckon he might be fucked honestly

very difficult to get a good yorker consistently when you need it
get it wrong and you go for runs

>England need to win every test after this to get the ashes
Ohnonono

smith writing his greatest storyline of single handedly defeating the english with 3 broken limbs

kek hope Smith keeps going and makes it worse

this is going to be a draw either way

imagine if Smith gets a ton then you find out he actually fractured his arm. Redemption arc kino

Pretty gud knock from cumboy to be honest, farming strike and giving Smith a rest with his broken fuckin arm

easy if smith's broken his arm though

Give him a couple of tramadol at tea he'll be grand lad

broken arm? legit broken or meme broken?

Leach runs like a bit of a spaz
Can see him heroically finishing this innings then being ruled out

this just adds to the redemption lad
watch him come out next test anyway and get another cheeky 100

This, take him off. This game is heading for a draw, it's not worth risking him for the rest of the series.

The smithanator started to show signs of distress. Not long now.

smith silencing all his critics by scoring a quadruple hundred with a completely severed limb and then going on to dominate the rest of the series as a double amputee

We have OFFICIALLY passed 200 confirming this is NOT an embarrassing innings total

Congrats lads

The absolute state of English cricket fans at the ground literally applauding these arm breaking cheats

Autists are insensitive to pain, Smith will be fine.

>smith scoring off archer with ease despite a BROKEN FUCKING ARM
my god how is this man such a god?

OH FUCK

>England still bowling Archer
Why do they do this?

>those cooked English faces

It's over

HEEM SLEEPY

>Breaking his arm didn't work
>Now trying to kill him
This just isn't cricket.

English 'bowlers' are pure trash

SMOTH OFF THE FUCKING HEAD NOW

holy fuck is he dead?

This is absolute shithousery now to be honest. Don't like it.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

WHAT A BEAUT.

That's why

Jofra ‘Sean Abbott’ Archer

Not like this!

the coward joe root resorting to broken fucking arms instead of dismissing smith

The threat of intentional harm is what makes cricket

FUCK
what the FUCK is this shit

Modern players have thicc af bats and the luxury of much better protective gear, whereas Bradman was still playing on uncovered pitches

The fact that nobody in the modern era has anywhere near Bradman's average is a testament to his skill

BRADMAN REINCARNATE
POOF ON SUICIDE WATCH

FUCKING MURDERING CUNTS

they've killed him

heem smith

It's no worse than Ponting had from Harmison. It's worked anyway, he's out now.

>the nigger not even apologizing

does england have no shame nowadays?

>English now trying to kill him
You will not stop his century lads

HUGHES'D

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NOT AGAIN

Smith getting absolutely blacked today

WICKET
GET OUT GO TO A HOSPITAL CUNT

dear oh dear

these cunts are legitimately trying to kill smith
what the FUCK?
cunt didnt even see if he was okay

BAH GOD IT'S HIM!
IT'S STEVE WAUGH!
STEVE WAUGH COMING OUT TO BAT
GOD AS MY WITNESS

Doubt Bradman faced faster than 130kph

3?

fucking rip

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>Even the cricket team has an Asian doctor
lmao

based smitty milking some drama so his century is even more amazing

Its just not griget

This is where Smith goes uber GOAT
bradmans spirit has entered him
Watch out Englel

Archer is so based

BLACKED RAW

show the fucking replay for god sake

>the nigger smiling

Starting a petition to bring Bitchwide out of retirement tbapahflehonestlads

Forever 80*

typically cowardly

You're now aware test cricket has concussion subs starting in this series.

Archer is laughing, LAUGHING

I see you're new to cricket

>bradmans spirit has entered him
So he's only going to bat 50s from now on? Bodyline worked.

>counting a retirement as a wicket
only an englishman could be so desperate

so they brought Archer in just to murder Smith correct?

r.i.p philp

>Need to judge if he's concussed or just autistic
Tough job for the doctor desu.

who is like for like for smith though?

Yep

when ever brett lee heem'd the fuck out of people he immediately would run up to them and see if theyre okay

Think archer may have smacked the autism out of him.

Smith dismissals - 0

better get him off to be safe.

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OUT! Archer got him.

brain scrambled

GONE

Labuschagne would come in I guess.

I see you didn't notice the change in the spirit of the game after hughesy died, you should be thanking your lucky stars because it's the only thing which stopped an eternal repeat of the 2013/14 ashes series from Bitchwide Johnson.

>HE'S WALKING OFF
OH NONONONONONONONONONONO AUS ARE FUCKED

Aussies SEETHING

GOTTEM

Them

>literally cannot dismiss smith
>try to break his fucking arm
>he still is smashing you around the park
>literally try murder him
>he still stands up fine
england are beyond pathetic

>Smith still got his average
havent stopped him yet
I laughed audibly user, thanks

Poor bloke

pathetic effort from england

Don't think that clapping in the hall will do his head any good tbqh

this is not kino lads, not kino at all

just have a milo and a lie down and bat later m8

Top lass that Janene

kek watch aussies whinge about aggressive short bowling now

Based spirit of Jardine

>ignores Siddle going back in

What a selfish cunt

SAME OLD AUSSIES
ALWAYS COWERING

GOTTIIIM

very glad to not have any anglo blood in me desu

Them muffled boos lol

almost killed him

>tfw no sean abbot in the squad to murder this cunt jofra

We've cracked the code lads
Just knock the cunt out

holy shit the delivery actually hit him in the neck right where Hughes got hit rather than the head.

damn, gottem in the neck

Archer is going to suffer next at bat for this shit. Not cricket. Joe Root is a disgrace to the sport for allowing this.

I'd like to hear what Sue from Teddington has to say about this.

Oh shit side of the neck. Fucking serious. Hope you are ok Smith. Based

>hit on the neck

he actually nearly got hughes'd

fuck me right on the neck

that was legit in the Phil Hughes area, very unsporting from England. Expected from a nigger but still, it's just not cricket.

Elite Siddle 34 (66) coming up lads

Theres really not enough light to be facing balls that quick

IT HAS HIT AS SAME SPOT AS HUGHES KEKEKEKEKEK

Look lads he's running away again
Go hide for another year you coward

properly copped it too

AUSTRALIA 1 - 1 ENGLAND

ROOTS PLAN WORKING

NOT ILLEGAL

PURE TEST MATCH CRICKET

fucking hell and no honeycomb either

Get Sean abbot on the phone.

oh shit that was right in the Hughes spot too fuck

broken fuckin arm
broken fuckin jaw

Broken fucking vertebral artery

>england think they did good
Reminder if Archer did this, imagine what Aus bowling can do
just wait

>giving him the old Hughesy special

pretty upset lads

Why's he not wearing the fucking guards they brought in after phil's death? What the actual fuck

Archers going to get it hard if he gets to bat again

KO

>Even the doctor is from NSW (Sydney)

Holy fucking based, only problem is if we kill enough brain cells that means more room for the autism cells perhaps making him a better batter

>jaw
Neck

That was on the fucking neck

>part of the game

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phillip_Hughes

Cricket is too dangerous imo.

Thats what you get when you turn your neck into the ball

Smith is an idiot....

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NEED johnson in the side to mop up and kill every single english player

>hapa medic convinced Smith to get some scans for a little bee sting
lmoaing at this sheer shitshow of incompetence

not even meme's my heart skipped on that replay thinking of Hughes, this nigger is gonna get it at bat.

Shan't be watching this bloodsport any more.

FUCK ME that must hurt

>imagine what Aus bowling can do
*spins a 5mph ball at u*

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really hope he cops it relentlessly from all the quicks for this

*collapses in the dressing room in 15 minutes*

>we might have another one of these

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Love a wicket now

Wagner would murder someone on this pitch

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Fucking pathetic that Smith gets hit in the Phil Hughes lethal zone and the Brits are sitting back having a chuckle. Absolutely zero respect for this group of clowns.

Can Aussies take what they dish out?

No. No they can't.

So Archer nearly kills Smith, and he doesn’t even check up on him. What a nice fella!

>a nigger literally kills their best batsman
>can't do anything
OH NONONONONONO

>cummins playing the short stuff better than smith

That's her permanently banned.

Fast bowlers always have and always will look to cultivate a tough image. Sorry that his bowling wasn't politically correct enough for you.

He was bowled out.

Smith allowed himself to be struck there. Very poor batting. I'd also like to remind you that we aren't racist in /cric/, feel free to go back to Yea Forums.

It is his fault.

Honestly archer has been bowling like a fucking idiot at him all day

this isnt funny anymore lads.. let's just concede the series things are getting too heated, this is just a cricket game for god's sake, not war

Aussies exposed

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>bowl bouncers non stop at archer
No problem
>archer gives it back
UGHHH CHEATING. BAD SPORTSMANSHIP

too soon

should bouncers be BANNED?

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youtube.com/watch?v=ZrQ0VMHK0Ec

It's the attitude mate, apologize when you hurt someone.

shield os autism saving him

Why doesn't he have those extra plastic bits round the back of his helmet?

Reckon Archer would bowl like this at a brother? No chance. This is simple hatred for the white man.

based Archer, effectively got 2 Steve Smith wickets ( 1 per innings)

>Smith allowed himself to be struck there.
oh for sure my guy, a reflex reaction to duck and shrug 0.02 seconds after realizing he's fucked was totally his choice.
no wonder your entire country is BLACKED

very disappointed in british integrity, will no longer feel bad reading the news 2bh

>non stop
>he faced 20 balls total

lmoa

Don't let your pussy boys out here with the killers

NEED to ensure all these english dogcunts cop it

t. nigger

Archer seems like a complete fuckwit, just turned and walked away. I'm all for memes but jeez

The white man shows concern for his fellow man.

youtube.com/watch?v=ikJj4JPgMBc

Fuck that subhuman Archer.

he is planning on visiting his funeral and then blacking his wife la

Joe Roots captaincy has to be considered the most disgraceful period in English test history. A flood of sheer incompetency with the high tide mark being the use of a nigger to attempt to kill a fellow cricketer.

So lads, how long does a scan at the hopital take?
I reckon we will still smith out later

Until they actually hurt someone, then they check to see if they're ok.

well a retard but yeah

He should have those, he'd still get hurt from that one though.

BREAKING: Steve Smith has collapsed face first into his bowl of Coco Pops and suffered a fatal brain aneurysm during the second test of the 2019 Ashes at Lord's - BBC News

was the same with chanderpaul

dirty fuckin engpakis done that deliberately

should have to forfeit the game, cheating cunts

can not WAIT for the Englel seethe when they get it next at bat, don't you dare think you can talk shit you fucking sub-humans

ngl it would be pretty based if archer killed steve smith in his first test match

poor batting from Smith

took his eyes off the ball

still smith is an actor not moving mate

with R NHS it could take a couple weeks

Take note you British cunts

Imagine facing Archer though

Please remain calm. Archer got Smith out with excellent bowling.

Sorry that I made you sad and angry my friend.

I see, whereabouts in the rules is that stated?

ITT: Australia fucking seething, unable to handle any banter

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>all this Aussie seethe after years of having faster bowlers try to injure English players
Enjoying this thread

So this is an Aussie win yeah?
Honorary of course. I expect the Queen to come and apologize personally next test match at the start

declare?

>still bowling short after knocking a bloke out
Archer is cold blooded. Based tbqh

retired is not the same as out you stupid casual

>Archer got Smith out
trying too hard/10

finally understand all the bong hate lads. what a disgusting people

>implying cricket rules need to be written down

FRESHIE

Any webm of Smith's death lads? Picked a bad time to go and do the dishes

My problem is that he turned right around and didn't give two shits that he almost killed a man. Seen nothing but poor sportsmanship from England this series.

couple of months m8

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too brainy

Thought it was a legitimate tactic desu. Probably not appropriate to be laughing though.

I thought Archer wasn't British?
Which is it?

love it when the big kids fight

yeah this has enlightened me
fuck them

Great isn't it.

The coward won't return.

Yeah and they was all bouncers. Are you thick?

Doing lots of laughing right now.

The fuck happened to Smith?

When did Australia get so soft lads? I thought it was the Canadians that were obsessed with apologising. Friendly reminder that when the white man Pat Cummings was bowling 5/6 balls an over short it wasn't an issue

Archer is a tool utilised by disgusting anglos to injure their fellow man

bongs literally have no response to this. All the talk of Australians being too rethless at the game and today we saw some sorta pom-pet have a little giggle and what could've been a fatal blow. Still what can one expect from score-tamperers?

took his eye off the ball

>be subhuman bong
>nearly kill a man
>everyone stands around laughing and smirking

>be australian
>nearly kill a man
>immediately the whole team rushes to his aid to ensure he's okay, everyone genuinely concerned about his safety
what is wrong with the enl*sh?

Baby’s first ashes.

nearly got hughes'd but he should be fine

>thommo and lillee trying to kill people
>consistently have at least one fast bowler try to murderball
>literally bounce jonathan trott into depression and retirement

>waaah muh hugesy pls no bully too far :'( :'(

Reminder that Australia deserved Phil Hughes for repeatedly bumping cunts for decades and never once yielding when it became excessive.

dismissed by Archer

He'll be stuck on a waiting list for the next six months

Whitebois crying lmao

Why bother when an aussie cunt would apologise and then do it again. Absolute state of this attitude.

Starting to understand how my ancestors felt back in 1932 lads

just a friendly reminder that this is nothing more than Steve Smith deserves

I remember Smith saying the concussion test was and I quote, "too hard even at the best of times". Chances are he was honestly too stupid to pass it anyway hahahahaha.

There's literally nothing wrong with bowling aggressive bouncers, but checking on someone you smacked behind the ear actual millimetres from where a recent cricketer got struck and died should be some pretty basic human decency tbqh

a weapon.

We engniggers now, the paki is gone

Certainly added some spice to the series.

Watching Archer running in even with the old ball is thrilling.

Remember to apologise to every australian post you reply to lads, might hurt their feelings otherwise

Why didn’t anyone ask him if he was okay and give him a wolly-pop :(

>be britbong
>get exposed with facts and logic
>start lashing out like a madman
ever time

please stop sooking and embarrassing us in front of the englishmen

Remember when I used to play Sunday cricket you'd sometimes get a 14 year old girl come in to bat, and you weren't allowed to bowl anything other than spin to her in case she got hurt. Looks like we'll be forced to do the same with that absolutely baby Smith now

he certainly is a weapon

shut up cunt, johnson beat them black and blue for a whole summer and didn't apologise once

pretty much this
even bitchwide did it when he monged someone

Yeah but you still do it, it's called chivalry ya cunt, you're supposed to know all about it.

couple of beamers should sort him out

The only reason we did that was because we legitimately did kill a man with a bouncer.

This tbqh.

exactly. the goal is to get them out, not kill them

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that was based since he wasn't black nor english

>my gentlemans game

Shouldn't you be off murdering some guy with a broken pint glass after another thrilling one-all draw of wog ball?

>be Australian
>be angry and upset
>be British
>be happy, laughing

Poor show from your boys.

Stop whinging cunts.

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me, you ask? i'd be laughing my arse off if an australian bowler did that to an engl*sh subhuman. but england is completely in the wrong here

Not if he busted them in the head ya dickhead.

What an absolute fucking disgrace by England. Literally feeling sick to my stomach at the state of affairs that have transpired this day. What a fucking dark day for this sport. Bowling aggressively is one thing, but trying to fucking heem the shit out of the opposition's best player is so fucking dirty. What a fucking disgrace.

imagine being so pathetic at the game you created you have to bring in a slave from the far colonies to injure a convict who's outshining you. Beyond grim.

The real problem is its too fucking dark to be playing if some cunts bowling 90mph at your head

why didn't archer kiss the boo-boo better? this is literally the most sickening thing I have ever seen. short bowling should be illegal, if you throw a rock at someone's head in the street it is assault. this should be no different

>English posters growing a shitposting spine all of a sudden after hiding in the first test
>In a match we will still only draw at best

Really makes you think

this but unironically, brits aren't people

>allowed a concussion substitute
>not allowed a substitute for a broken leg
Can someone explain this?

>england still seething about based GOAT johnson
KEK

SHUT UP

>this series

Reminder to thank Archer for standing up where the ICC wouldn't and removing cheats from the sport

>be england
>cheat
every time lads

Stop putting bonelets out to bat.

Seb, you fat lad. I ask: why do you stay?

Hello friends I'm new to cricket. Is trying to kill the opposing batsman a legitimate bowling tactic?

now we're even after the vomit-inducing decision of david warner not to walk when he nicked off 1st ball in the last test

>P-p-p-please don't bowl fast at me Mr Englishman, I'm only Australian I can't handle it

only if you don't have the requisite rock licence

Next time watch the ball.

t. gay nigger

Can't tell if you're all softcocks or pretending to be softcocks.

>29 overs
I thought you wh*toids said Archer couldn't bowl more than four overs?

Sports leagues are scared of ex players suing for brain damage so concussion gets extra special treatment.

Where in the rules does it say you can’t bowl short?

>bowl a 95miles per hour bouncer into someones fucking neck
>still cant kill him
why are the english so meek and ineffective?

kek. Have you seen an ashes series?

Need based Johnson back to shoulder bump and death stare every cunt

Yeah, it was pioneered by Sean Abbott.

>patty cummins witnessed this all first hand

Could this be the moment "nice guy" Patrick Cummins grows a big dirty mustache and becomes the enforcer?

oh please, smith was fine he was flopping around like a sperg and didn't lose consciousness

maybe if he didn't act like an actual retarded child they wouldn't have been laughing at him

Of course

If you remove all cheats from the sport all you're left with are random European countries who haven't learned the game enough to even have a concept of cheating

>Smith tries to headbutt the ball away to protect his wicket
>gets concussion and walks

Yes.

Given your pet couldn't even defeat smith with a freshly broken arm @ 150 km/hr you might as well admit defeat, yeah.

business idea: batsmen wear full suits of plate armour at the crease

How many overs has Archer been bowling in this spell? Seems like he's been on for ages and gets the new ball.

New balls time for the wickets you fucking dog cunts no smoth to save you now

Sorry. Are you alright?

new

You know something is up when the Aussies are whinging, such a rare sight

can't die in cricket unless you forget to duck

if at least 2 batsmen on each side are not dead by the end of this series then I will know cricket has truly gone soft

>there are australians who are UNIRONICALLY trying to play the muh human decency card

Like I don't disagree, but holy shit educate yourself on your own fucking history. They'll never ever ever say anything of the sort when Starc or Cummins or Johnson or Lee or literally anyone ever does it

Reminder that Brett Lee used to intentionally beam people. Oh, but he apologised after so it was all good.

FUCK OFF YOU TWITCHY CUNT

When cum bowls beamers at a tail ender that's ok but Archer sends some short stuff against the best bat in the world and you lil bitches start moaning. Fuck right off

>implying bitchwide shoulder bumps some guy lying on the ground then stares down at him

Have you?

>smith to save us

last I checked it was 1-0 and this match is headed for a draw...

>couldn't even defeat Smith

Is he still out there mate? Could have sworn he was back in the pavilion where he belongs

he literally hit broad in the neck and did his ebin tough man stare routine you caz

>the second cumming
Can't wait desu

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Hmmm

Getting a bit tired of archers shit tbqh

Your sister is getting raped by pakis as we speak.

Soon to be back out to finish off the 100 to jeers of 'wot an ugly crab can't believe it'

australia wouldnt exist without the ANGLO BVLL

does retiring hurt count as an Out, for the purpose of working out averages?

that is now the dairy cow of pakistan...

based emma
i still remember the pointless threads before jannies took over and started actually enforcing rules

cric heating up

Is smith dead?

this is just the spark the ashes needed
I'm hoping this will create a chain of escalation where every bowling innings, the bowling gets more and more aggressive as each team wants to give it back to the other, until we get to the 5th test and both teams are bowling 3 'accidental' beamers an over

I'm upset about this but I've got to admit I wouldn't mind seeing some "accidental" beamers.

No, it's not a not out either, an out counts as you lose your wicket which if you retire you didn't

only real /cric/chads remember this meme
*inhale*
WIZZLE WAZZLE, BOY OH BOY