/epl/

real dont have a number 1 goalkeeper

Scousers and plastics

But I thought Liverpool were a “big club” why would they care about it

Nah they have 0PL so cant be considered a big club

Neymar is open to both Barca and Real.
Hmm
When does the window close for those filthy Europeans?

2nd september i believe

That’s shit. Glad we brexited desu

It still astonishes me that he’s been there long enough to have won a PL with them

Everyone’s won a prem at united. Wes Brown has one of the most impressive trophy hauls in world football and is literally shit at footie

>women

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why were they disqualified?

>Mauro Icardi is still waiting on a move to Juventus despite increasingly strong interest from Napoli and Roma, according to Gazzetta dello Sport.The striker has finally decided to leave Inter after realising that it would damage him more than the club to stay on the side-lines for an entire season.

Why would Juve want this cunt?

Is he referring to the premier league? If so, great banter

he's a good footballer

How many “prems” does Wan-Bissaka have

yeah, i assume so

You have to finish in a clear defined placing. Had one been 0.1 sec behind, it's legal, but otherwise there is noway to place them, so they both get yeeted. Originally some Bongs got around it by helping his running partner over the line but specifically did it by walking behind him and holding him over the line (he was injured or basically done). That was legal but they changed the rules after. You basically cannot do anything to assist other players to cross the finish line.

Tbf its literally impossible to win a prem game having played 1 game for someone (I really hope there isn’t some cunt kid who got a medal for coming on for 2 mins in the last game of a season)

for xxx

Yeah but his quality as a footballer doesn’t make up for his behaviour.
There’s some deluded Irish poster who is obsessed with Icardi and just constantly shits on him)

how did we all get on in our a levels?

Great banter then
Xxx

I took them 8 years ago and got 3A 1B and I retook the B a year later and got a C kek

boss is unironically SEETHING with rage after he's just been reviewing the footy fixtures for five minutes and then realised he'd been looking at the women's games

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There isn't. Benjamin Mendy is the lowest app playing guy in City who got it. Arijanet Muric played like 5 games total for City last year, but none for the PL so he didn't get one. But he did get FA Cup and League Cup.

"WHY DON'T THEY JUST PUT 'WOMEN' BEFORE IT?"
"IT'S NOT FUCKING FOOTBALL IS IT"
honestly crying with laughter behind my monitor

Great. Well then I’m a winner

Mendy played 10 games last year for City in the PL. 15 in total. There is rough 60 games a season or so

BBC for me (C in maths lmao)

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I took them about 10 years ago, did UUU, then redid them, UUU. Then redid them completely and did BBC, then CDD finally. Then found out I was dying and had brain damage. I don't think I'd do any better this time. I had a place at med school too, obviously didn't go lmao.

>Europa League: David Healy's steady hand puts Linfield on brink of £4m windfall

Бaceд

Haha

Haha

Lads. Am worried Maguire is going to be excellent this season

And that's a good thing

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i expect his form to peak in february and then tail off ready for the euros in the summer

Reckon Ole will go in for a midfielder in January?

Yeah, maybe some box-to-box runner type from the Uber Eats league

Lyon is bound to have someone decent, Tousart maybe

Tbh united have McSauce for B2B
Would imagine he would like a dedicated DM. I’m really surprised united didn’t go for Idrissa GAY

>McSauce

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Yeah, but Ole seems to want to play with a double pivot so McTo needs someone to partner him. Pogba is kind of wasted there and basically is a passenger for half the game. Move Pogba up the field and have the incoming midfielder take his place in the 2

Harry Kane: “Moussa, how are you so strong?”
Moussa: “Honestly, I don’t know. It’s natural. Most of the people in my family are strong as well so perhaps it’s genetic. I haven’t done too much in the gym, so it’s natural.”

>not loving banter

Who cares? Triathlons are for bored businessmen and middle aged women to have something to do with their time.

Macclesfield Town can confirm that after eight months with the club and successfully leading us to League Two safety last season, we have mutually agreed to part ways with manager Sol Campbell.

This has been conducted in the most amicable of ways and there has been total transparency between the club and Sol regarding the challenges which face lower league clubs such as Macclesfield Town.

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Agreed. Would prefer to see Pogba in the #10 position pereira and Lingard have been switching into. Literally Kante would be perfect in Ole’s system but can’t get him.

Unbelievable amount of racism from Macclesfield. How the government disbands them.

Not sure what this has to do with /epl/ lad.

Pereira needs to go anyway, he simple isn't good enough for where United want to be

1. sol campbell is an /epl/ legend
2. the macc lads have provided many an /epl/ soundtrack

Soon to be managing Chelsea.

Is that how it usually works for England internationals? I thought they just magically became shit as soon as they put on the England jersey.

he's a big fat lump of a man

Tbf United literally don’t have anyone to cover his position in the team right now unless they play Mata against weaker teams

yeah, the problem with football is that all the doping cycles are built around club football, so everyone's shagged during the summer international tournaments

Poobag can’t play as a 10. He needs to receive the ball in his own half where he has a few yards to do some fancy dribbles and hoof it to pacey nogs on the wings.

>euros in the summer
Nice to assume England will make it. I mean, we probably will. Twat Bulgaria 4-0, Kosovo 5-0 and then qualify and go out in group stage.

Wouldn’t describe him as fat desu
But then he also “can’t defend” so what do you do with him?

Never forget that big Harry scored the equaliser in a 1-1 draw at Anfield last season during the period in which Liverpool’s lead slipped.

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>Poobag
haha

That's just bollocks. England just isn't good. England should be using that new chemical found in spinach that makes massive muscle mass before it is banned as a substance. Also winning the Euros is pointless, nobody cares.

Umm sweaty. Did you see the World Cup? England will be in the final. Book it.

Play Pogba in a midfield 3 with 2 people that make up for his lack of discipline like at Juventus and the French team

He's a luxury player in the end

qualifies him as a yernited legend in the no trophy era

spinach once again solidifying its spot in the upper echelons of the veg power rankings (alongside broccoli and peas)

England will have a major home advantage because you'll play all group matches (unless Scotland qualifies) and the semi-final and the final at Wembley if you make it that far

interesting statement

wonder if this is something to do with the unpaid wages case

>Anglos think they stand a chance

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Broccoli and peas is amazing.

Lel. We'll never get out of the groups.

yeah, they make a point of mentioning the harsh realities of lower league football, so it's presumably a financial decision, not a footballing one

Broccoli is low tier

God tier: onion, tomato(fuck off you fruit faggots)
Great tier: mushroom, peas, pepper,leek
Good tier: mangetout/sugarsnap/haricot verts, carrots, beetroot, spring onion, cauliflower
Bad tier: broccoli, celery, swede, butternut shite

For me, it's mashed potatoes

Is Garner a CDM,CM or CAM. Could he work with McSauce in assisting Pogba in being able to do fuck all?

Don't know who he is desu

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No, no, it's clearly because he's black.

NEVERLANDS haha. Get it? Netherlands first port of business is finding a better GK and some world class left wingers. I mean I have no idea how your qualification is going, though.

yikes, i think i'd just about reverse your rankings
if it ain't green, it's not for me (apart from leeks which are gross). if it's orange then it belongs in the bin (except for butternut squash)

De Ligt is literally shit m8
Potato, milk, butter, salt, black pepper (all not vegetables)

>if it's orange then it belongs in the bin
Rude

loooool

Celery is indeed shit but I have a whole head of broccoli most nights. It is king diet food (and then I undo it all by eating a whole bar of M&M peanut chocolate, thank god im not fat yet). You're missing shit like courgettes, cucumber and so on.

>South East Asia

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What makes broccoli great for dieting? Am interested because I’m getting fat and want to stop that

GET THE KID IN OLE

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It's about 100cal for a large head and it's a huge amount of bulk so you feel full. If you really want to lose weight, buy cauliflower rice. It's basically slightly cauliflower flavoured rice, so treat it as regular rice. It's like 40cal for an entire packet. I usually have some chicken with some and broccoli and that comes to like 500cal for a main meal.

Where do I normally locate cauliflower rice in the supermarket? Is it frozen or fresh or dehydrated?

Also James Garner will be next GOAT CDM

ASDA does frozen and fresh. Tesco does frozen. Dunno about Waitrose or Sainsburies. As for James Garner, apparently the new Carrick, la.

Tbh united don’t need a QB like Carrick they need a destroyer who has high work rate and can move the ball to Pogba and McSauce. Fred would be perfect for this (if he hadn’t turned to shit since joining united)

Spinach is very high in oxalis acid do enjoy your kidney stones.

>his dick is so small that he can feel kidney stones
Yikes, mine just plop out

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What

>Wilfried Bony: Striker could move to Europe after spell at Newport County

>bbc.co.uk/sport/av/football/49356432
Imagine if he fucked this up. Just imagine. His team mate cheered after be rounded the GK and then the sheer terror when he didn't tap it in and instead let the defender attempt to block it and then, instead of dribbling it over the line, hits it and could have easily kit the post.

if youre fat just stop eating anything with fat in it lol.
also move your body.

get your votes in lads!

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Couldn’t find cauliflower rice in supermarket

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Where'd you go, lad?

Sainsbos dulwich

go the m&s near east dulwich station they'll have it there

They have fresh and frozen I think but

Cricket is back on now lad.

>denshit

Trips confirms he’s shit

>*lose*
>I think we were the better team
>*lose again*
>I think we were the better team

Based or cringe?

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It's a better gimmick than Ole's 'We're Man United' schtick

did he really say they were the better team after getting humped 4-0 lmao?
like they weren't the better team last night either, but at least they were competitive for more than 20 minutes

He’ll be sacked before Christmas and then just join sky with Gary and Jamie

he should go to celtic and see if he's really better thna stevie g

Stevie G will also move to the prem and be found out very quickly. I would assume he’s an even worse manager than Lampard.

YFW Ole becomes a hugely successful manager now he has his team at the level of fitness he requires. Yfw he becomes the most successful manager of all time. Yfw Sir Alex’s prophecy comes true.

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I mean, Chelsea were a lot better than the scoreline suggested against United.

>Arsenal manager Unai Emery is "100% confident" Mesut Ozil and Sead Kolasinac are mentally ready to play against Burnley on Saturday.

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>ole

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United were still the better team objectively

>he doesn't use Twitter's dark mode

Do swedes hate norweiGOATs?

ew why would you do that
white text on dark background gives you eye cancer btw

friendly banter nation

Good. Ozil is hilariously now a rotation player because he's so bad. I'd like to see this line up.

Attached: lineup(15).png (480x600, 84K)

>he uses twatter

Loses every game 12-13

50 up for rabbie burns

>we'll have a bowl
Dumb wogs

>>>/cric/

that's why it'd be fun.

I want this season to be over soon

>>>the bin

>Marcelo Bielsa says he will not reveal Leeds United team for Wigan game - then reveals it
Leleds in PL would be great if Bielsa was still manager.

how easy is it to watch championship matches in italy? you know, just thinking ahead for next season

Do they have enough money to sign decent players to stay up?

Almost impossible, but I think we all admit not watching the championship is a blessing.

Norwich spent less than fucking Liverpool, so, there is no actual guarantee that they'd buy anybody. Leleds, that is. Either way, if they DID get promoted I suspect a Villa style splurge.
>Oh well if we go back down, we'll meme around the play-offs again anyway

>o-offside la'

remember when we were good at cricket for like 3 days

what do liverpool need to do to fix their defence? is it just a case of playing a bit deeper? or is everyone still just a bit rusty?

Norwich have A meme manager though and PUKKI

Cameroon have a CB who’s name is literally Banana

No.

racist much?

his da invented the banana

Attached: A31A7196-064A-49D8-AA04-4A0150A32BE8.jpg (828x1529, 157K)

>Onana
>Banana
Same thing, innit.

>iwobi
>scoring
fake news

very racist delete this right now

>Onana
>what’s my name?

It was in the Wog Cup of Nations so it was against other nogs

>On fitting Lacazette and Aubameyang into the team: "Last year they played a lot of matches together, Auba right or left as a winger.

>“His capacity can help us this year. They are strikers but above all I think we can use them in different situations.”

Run Pepe and Auba as forwards that drift out wide and you're sorted. The issue is Laca is a manlet and just isn't gonna score on his own.

actual racism is very grim

>zumba gives up an unbelievably stupid penalty
>Dave gets caught ball watching for next two goals
>Eriksen is pretty much played like shit
>Emersen let AWB have complete freedom in the attacking third despite having no offensive ability
>Pedro, Jorginho, and Kovacic put no pressure on any United player on the counter
>Maguire won basically every long ball aerial duel
>vast majority of Chelshits shots were at the Chevy bow tie on de gays jersey

But please, tell me again how Chelsea played better than United. Lampard will be sacked by Christmas and the only reason it won't be sooner, despite getting shit results, is because of his status as a club player. He's going to get justed and hard.

>Eriksen is pretty much played like shit
?

>Ex-Sunderland midfielder Lee Cattermole has joined Dutch Eredivisie side VVV Venlo on trial, in view of earning a permanent deal.
lolwut, i swear cattermole was a competent premier league player a couple of years ago

Eriksen?!

>Eriksen
>tf
>tp

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Unironically they need a player at every position but keeper. Adrian is a solid back up, but they literally have no one to they can rely on as a backup in any position, especially in the attacking third. When your best CM is James Milner and Origi and manlet shakiri are your backup wingers/striker, you're going to have issues. The wheels are going to come off the bus this year for Liverpoop. Two years of memenpress and international tournaments for your front 3 + no reincorments and depth is a recipe for disaster. They'll also go straight back to a mix table club if "muh man mountain" gets injured. No chance a CB pairing of gomez, matip or llovern is able to keep a clean sheet.

how many almost assist did eriksen get in the game?

almost unfathomable amount of errors and mistruths in this particular wall of angry text

Seriously lads, just filter the US flag out in the settings
You're litterally missing nothing

I mean there are a lot of spelling errors but the points are largely true

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fucking hell the absolute state of england

But Liverpool don't memenpress anymore.

>expecting Engpakis to be good at anything
They won the World Cup so who cares.

I want this life to be over soon

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It's the connection between the keeper, AliGOAT and Van Dyke, who last season played better.

Don’t do it.

They need the following
- a high quality full back back up (eg Cancelo)
- a high quality CB back up (eg John stones)
- a high quality midfield back up x2 (eg Rodri/Gundogan)
- a high quality forward back up x3 (eg Sane/mahrez/Jesus)

Fuck. When you actually put it like that Liverpool are miles off city.

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jesus that's £350m of backup players

That’s the cost of winning the epl. Which is why epl is more prestigious than CL nowadays

Is Liverpool just very lucky when it comes to injuries, apart from Gomez?

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Not really, Liverpool lost last season because of one of their main creative outputs, Trent, was injured.
Want to batter the people calling for Gomez to be backup fullback, he is shite at the position and adds nothing going forwards.

BASED NONCE

we had a good run last season, just gomez long term and keita/lallana/lovren in and out
we had a bad run at the end of 17/18 though; we only had three fit midfielders for like the last 10 games of the season

oh and ox obviously

>we
Shan't be reading a word more of this post.

Jesus
1. Their back up full back is Gomez who is their first choice CB or Milner who is shit at FB
2. They’re back up CB is fucking Lovren
3. Their back up midfielders are Milner who runs hard but it shit and Keita who is always injured and looks bang average.
4. Their back up forwards are Shaquiri who is ok. Origi who is a meme. And Brewster who has absolutely no experience and we don’t even know if he’s good or shit.

i don't believe you x

Sunderland save game going well. 2nd in the league and beat Arsenal and Newcastle in the FA Cup before losing to Liverpool.

>2. They’re back up CB is fucking Lovren
Not anymore lmao
Sold him to fucking Roma haha
Klopp said fucking Hoever, the 17 year old is now backup ahahahahaha

He’ll be injured again in a week or so, he came from arsenal

Any one else have a cunt in primary school who would always go the ref? No one asked him to. Weirdo

>bang average
My fav gimmick

>Milner who runs hard but it shit
SHAN'T be reading your posts any longer.

>Sold him to fucking Roma haha
you're aware that hasn't actually happened right? i think they're looking to get him on loan now

What the fucking fuck is wrong with Klopp? Is he a secret ABL?

Any other player that completed the "Firmino Hat-trick"? (winning the cl, super cup, and continental cup)

Attached: Firmina.png (544x545, 578K)

i know what he means tbf, i've been grimacing whenever i've been watching milner player since half way through last season
he was crap yesterday as well

True tho innit hence why city dumped him

If the midfield setup wasn't so questionable they would look significantly better, I'm #FSGOUT until >we get an actual creative midfielder.

Milly is past it

>tfw no Firmino gf to assist me in my day to dat life
JUST

my ratio of posts in /epl/
40% just reposting things i've seen on twitter / 10% sincere opinions about the might reds and whatever other clubs / 20% posting reds memes / 20% off-topic / 10% metaposts

To be fair like 40% of /epl/ is offtopic metaposts.

>England's top six average 26.07 runs-per-dismissal in Test cricket this year. The last time they averaged less was 1950.
very grim

Silver, as a metal, is highly addictive.

When you get your hands on it, the metal rubs off onto the skin and is absorbed into the bloodstream.

It makes you want it more and more until you can't get enough, and will run through a brick wall to get it.

We are Liverpool, and we are addicts...

[Thank you for sharing]

Just got on the exercise bike lads. See ya in 45.
Also 0PL!!!

yes, i certainly hope that you ballsack doesn't get caught in the inner workings of your exercise bike in a bizarre and unfortunate accident

Impossible on home exercise bikes lad

>SC Paderborn: The 'miracle' Bundesliga return

Why didn’t Everton replace Idrissa Gueye?

twitter.com/ukhomeoffice/status/1161629920856084481

>lets waste time on this instead of preventing these people coming here haha nah

>Bury need money
>Games are suspended so they can't earn any ticket money

What did the EFL mean by this?

Banter I guess

Fatkaku was basically the epitome of everything wrong with that squad
Passion merchant Herrera is gone too

Jesus Christ...

If I had a twitter account I'd accuse them of racism because blacks consume chicken the most.

that's literally what the controversy is

Pretty much this. Getting rid of Lukaku was the most important part of Ole’s revolution.

yeah dem rojos and darmians tho real go getters

haha epic

Watching world cups most shocking moments. State of young becks

inb4 back-to-back-to-back defeats and everyone wants ogs's head again

*cuts up his KFC meal with a hunting knife*

They memepress situationally. Much more comfortable to sit deep with VVD now but they got caught trying to memepress chelshit who was pretty easily able to beat it. It’ll still work against low/mid table sides whose gk’s and cbs aren’t comfortable on the ball

They provide the team entertainment weekly with Phil Jones. Important parts of the squad lad. It’s like you don’t understand footie

>blacks consume chicken the most.

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why would you cut up a finger lickin' good meal you mong

Miracle that someone was willing to buy Lovren

It's a meme in America at least. Think everyone like it over here though

Roma are idiots. That’s why they want Icardi too

USA has bullet proof glass and one door open lock systems for KFC. I think it's pretty safe to assume it isn't middle class white folk vaulting the counters.

Nah it is a largely darkie thing here because it is dirt cheap.

Business idea: #StopBeingAFatCunt on McDonalds meals

Rojo provides vital two foot tackles to shock and startle opposition and Darmian is a token Italian

Now Englel are back to their 90s best I can still support India but mostly i'm ABA. Fucking aussie cunts

Chav side of my family all love a bit of fried chicken m8

>being shook by a 2 foot tackle
Gay Liverpool fan spotted

Pretty sure people of all colour in the southern states like fried chicken. Probably in New York or wherever it's mostly a black thing though

i very much enjoyed a bucket of chicken before my conversion to based vegetarianism and i am emphatically white

Watching the Europa League tonight lads?

This Japanese women’s rugby Guinness advert is fucking kino

Do Japanese people drink guinness?

i was thinking i might watch chaturbate all night 2bh

Literally what?

Guys I am not saying that white people don't like chicken, I am saying it is largely a black thing due to the economics of it all.

Hai!

'snot though is it

skysports.com/europa-league-fixtures

How come I see black people in Burger King and that place is expensive as fuck?

>"It was amazing waking up every morning and training with these amazing players. It was crazy."

>Gerardo Bruna says he was living "every kid's dream" when he was on the books as a youth player at Real Madrid and Liverpool.

Never heard of it

because people sometimes want some fukken chicken for £3 with fries and a drink. Not a Double Whopper meal for like £9.

Also if you walk into Burger King nowadays and ask for a cheeseburger which is on their menu they kick you out the place. Pretty fucked up tbqhywl

>now plays at Derry City
damn

THE FUCKING STATE OF THE BEEB.

bbc.co.uk/sport/football/49335941

THIS IS AN ARTICLE.

That is one of the weirdest, stupidest and down right awful adverts I have ever fucking seen. Which makes me chuckle as McDonalds has released a 'you can now get a double quarter pounder with cheese now'.

Everyone like fried chicken, only certain people will kill for it
>foxnews.com/us/alabama-man-77-guilty-of-shooting-son-over-really-good-chicken-wings-while-watching-super-bowl

BK has the better desserts

>BK has the better desserts
It does?

>start chatting about fast foods
>yanks flood the thread

>trending in the US

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Fucking hell. Do glad I don't pay the licence fee

you should

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>Yea Forums filename
STATE.

happy now?

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Finished on the exercise bike lads. Feel good.

>same filesize and everything
S T A T E

Thoughts on Florence and the Machine?

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PELE
PELE PELE WAS SHITE
HE WAS WORSE THAN JASON LEE

chng.it/CfKFWfxxct

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Nice to see the BBC improving their standards

great first album, she went a bit off the rails after that

Did the machine remove her penis?

crap band that was unsuccessfully forced by the media for a while

impressive get

BASED. WE DID IT /EPL/. GET FUCKED /HOC/, /MLB/, /F1/ AND ALL YOU OTHER FUCKS.

>eat a giant burger, huge bag of chips and gallon of cola
>need dessert

Shit

just saying, i have the best normie music taste in this thread and florence's first album was great

Don’t forgot /cric/

>between two lungs
>it was released

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MAsoN MOUNT(ain)

/cric/ doesn't need any more bullying.

Shame he’s crap at football

Stormzy > Florence
youtube.com/watch?v=PxbzujA69DA

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Coffee

For me it is the album Epsilon by Blood Stain Child.

never heard of it mate

Attached: 1535167607447.png (785x602, 77K)

Are you still dying mate

Dont have time to listen to many albums only put music on if I cant sleep and just stick some chilled out mix on youtube

yeah, he's been crying for sympathy all summer

Not that I know. I fixed that particular issue. It was heart being damaged by some shit. Injected myself every day for years with shit.

No mate, there is that cancer user who was upset, but I am not him. I don't want sympathy nor need it.

fair play, i stand corrected

no worries mate, I was thinking about the cancer user, he seemed more annoyed with NHS.

Glad to hear it pal

>25-year-old Kolasinac
Wait, Kolasniac is 25? I thought he was like 29 now. Either way, we can see how memey the team is. Doubt Arse will win anything empathetically at all.

That was me. I am in full remission pleased to say. NHS are fucking shite tho. Shall be voting labour next time round.

>Loses first two games as head coach
>The scorelines are just flattering. We were the better team.
>Take away our mistakes and the goals we let in and we were clearly better.

Lampard doesn't make it the season.

nasty stuff is cancer, or so i hear

Glad you're okay mate

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In the bath lads. AMA. Also gonna bang the kettle on in a second anyone want anything? Also got some ginger biscuits, bourbons, custard creams, couple of Oreos. 1 blue ribband and 1 tunnocks tea cake.

*begs for yous*
get a life lad

Any of her taking a cock in the arse? Or a load of cum on the face?

Sort me a tea (pg tips) milk no sugars and I’ll take a bourbon and a custard cream, thank you
(You)

Give it time pal

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Black coffee no biccy I’m trying to lose weight

How much time we talking?

disgusting

i've never been more sure of anything that liverpool are going to win the league this season

I would immediately check yourself into a mental institute then because you’re obviously not in your right mind.

SEETHING ABL.

Broad shoulders
No ass
No tits
Boyish face
Hips are the only redeeming quality

Smelly pits
Spotty arse
Matted snail trail
Webbed toes
Fatty liver

>No ass
>No tits
nothing wrong with that

Delusion. What would I have to seethe about. I checked again this morning and it’s still 0PL for Liverpool

youtube.com/watch?v=8hIYYCi3_Cs
>pinned comment

Make sure you check again tomorrow

not for long lad

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I hope you top yourself when we win this year, lad. Or perhaps you could come to our side. We can always use one more mighty red in the Kop.

How do you define “long”? 30 years? It’ll be 60 by then. Kek

>scousers still trying to crush themselves into a small stand
Won’t they ever learn?

that's a big old KEKEKEKEKEK from me

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He’s right you know

What you doing for dinner lads? I know it’s early but I’m prepping now.
Making some lamb koftes a feta and pomegranate cous cous and maybe so saag aloo

Samefag.

pizza and cheesy chips

Btfo
>inb4 you didn’t get my sarcasm/banter/joke

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Not gonna help you lose weight user.

Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo and Virgil van Dijk have been nominated for the 2018/19 UEFA Men's Player of the Year award.

The rest of the top ten

4 Alisson Becker (Liverpool & Brazil) – 57 points
5 Sadio Mané (Liverpool & Senegal) – 51 points
6 Mohamed Salah (Liverpool & Egypt) – 49 points
7 Eden Hazard (Chelsea/Real Madrid & Belgium) – 38 points
8= Matthijs de Ligt (Ajax/Juventus & Netherlands) – 27 points
8= Frenkie de Jong (Ajax/Barcelona & Netherlands) – 27 points
10 Raheem Sterling (Manchester City & England) – 12 points

Don't tell me meme mountain will actually win it

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it's fine, it all just goes straight to my boobs

If anyone other than Messi or CR7 win it then the balon d’or should be scrapped

Would be better if it went to your ass

why would it be cr7, he's wank

>mfw the main highlights video got deleted
Lol

Taboule will lamb chops

Heh

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clearly you've never tried to find well-fitting jeans

Hattrick against Atleti hattrick in semi of nations league. Etc etc
iirc VVD didn’t score a single hattrick last year

Messi fanboys at it again

Just wear football shorts

>scousers not rigging every online poll ever
Even that doesn’t stop the undeniable truth that is Messi should win

i think the winner of the balon dor should be not a rapist

>Literally Kante would be perfect in Ole’s system but can’t get him.
yeah, Maradonna and Rivaldo would have been decent in the system too

you fucking mong

ogs wouldn't have the slightest clue how to utilise rivaldo

i'm honestly liking the way >we're playing, only the defense that is in need of more work. been worried with that since the pre-season, specially after they conceded 3 goals against salzburg
but it seems like lampard is being able to motivate the lads quite well, as the team is playing with voluptuousness
i can only hope that this fucking board will have patience with franky, he can only improve on his tactical aspect and he is the man to control that cancer of a dressing room, he is the man that no other player can think is better than him
super frank is the one to carry >our team forward

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he never was

No. The one who won the most trophies should win it, at least if we take into account the last 10 years of the balon door.

If instead, the actual best player of the year should win the balon door, then messi should return a couple of those to the actual winners.

Why do you care about this board? It’s Roman who’ll sack him in a couple of months

It was reported that roman promised him no sack this year

The best player should win. That’s still the criteria set out for it. It hasn’t changed.

I’m not particularly a Messi fan but which ones should he return. If you say Sneijder you’re wrong.

you know what i meant by "board"

Great. Does he have that written down anywhere and signed by Roman?

>muh attacking bias
Stick to sports with high scores, champ.

vvd is probably the greatest defender the world has ever seen
it would be a travesty for him not to won at least one balon d'or with that in mind

he would probably have to win a world cup for that to happen, just like cannavaro

>vvd is probably the greatest defender the world has ever seen
steady on

haha good joke lad haha

certainly in the past forty years
maybe there's a case for a beckenbauer or a hansen but in recent history? no

>Gotta be Gini Milner and Lallana in midfield at the weekend
Gotta stop spending time with retards.

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she's got gorgeous eyes

haha

for me it's the smile!

>certainly in the past forty years
and you would know because...

feminine intuition

twitter.com/BlackYellow/status/1161717774542151680
Always rated Dortmund lmao

Kek

lel

Lads. She had massive tits!

four times

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>had

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oh yeah now you mention it they do have some heft to them

i didn't even notice!

I dealt with them

>That’s still the criteria set out for it. It hasn’t changed.

l o l

As in the literal description of it hasn’t changed. Obviously they just hand it out to a team who won stuff now a la modric. That was the most bullshit award of balon dor ever and if they do it again fuck them

wow she really does didn't even notice

VVD is a better attacker than messi is a defender
for that reason he should get the balon

Christ

>Scottish fitba

>Chelsea lose
>oh it doesn't really matter, they were the better teams. Bright times ahead for lampard!
Why is there such a Chelsea bias in the media

the supercup is just the european community shield though

Lamps literally worked with the pundits, of course they will defend him.

Scotland can realistically qualify for Euro 2020

Why are leltic fans so toxic? By far the most vicious fanbase of any club I’ve come across

t. his club has never won the supercup
its the crowning glory

>all their good players play in the same position
Hmm.

PAKIS OUTT

They are I*ish.

Honestly don't even know who their manager is

>its the crowning glory
so that means the community shield is the crowning glory of domestic football then

no its a shield for charity

>liverpool win super cup
BIGGEST THING EVER
>liverpool lose community shield
lol who cares

nice consistency lad

the supercup is the continental equivalent of the community shield: nobody cares about it unless they win it

You lads ever tried winning an argument against a female? It’s literally impossible

>alisson injured
>keita injured
>fabinho injured
>lovren sold

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I don't talk to females.

women are typically smarter and less prone to angry nonsensical outbursts than men

>less prone to angry nonsensical outbursts than men

>less prone to angry nonsensical outbursts than men
spotted the virgin

super cup wins are incredibly rare, its literally the hardest trophy in club football to win apart from the club world cup, sure its just an addition to the main thing, but its nice
charity shield is a shield IE not a trophy, thats not an accident

it being a shield doesn't make it a friendly, bundeslinga and eredivisie have shield trophies
it's a friendly because it uses a firendly ruleset and is regarded as a pre-season match by the fa and the clubs

Chances of Rangers losing 3-0?

Don't we all

>US women's football team talks with national federation over equal pay break down
>say they're going to court
Killing football in USA in one fell swoop OR being BTFO by FACTS and LOGIC.

Extremely high, it will happen. Sevco are fucking shit

Um, sweety, the BBC counted the Community Shield in Liverpool's potential septuple trophy run article. So it is a trophy. Don't be mad :)

They won 4-2 lad, I think 3-0 is not extremely high, possible, but not extremely high.

>Misspelling sweaty

um, swotty.... you're not in a position to talk here :))

youtu.be/A7ZqxqJcKLI

so this is the power of british football

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>the new saints
soulless
>total network solutions
SOUL

Why are you surprised a Welsh team is getting rekt? Like expecting Miedź Legnica to beat Salzburg.

>That was the most bullshit award of balon dor ever

Were you born last year?

>only good if your manager has the right system to “utilize” you
The mark of a true fraud.

Wasn’t everyone saying the back 4 were the only bright spot in the Chelsea squad before the season?

>Norway Chelsea falseflagger is now falseflagging on the reg
Christ.

Probably because they played under busparkers

Is there a delay with the Rangers game? Should have started 15mins ago.

No footybites is fucked

twitter.com/RangersFC/status/1162076832205877248

Does this answer your question?

MIDGITLAND BTFO

Why do they even bother putting articles on their front page? It just makes it so much harder for EVERYONE to get where they want to go

Ah reet.

Good on Rangers. Now to meme it up they qualify for EL and Celtic don't. Celtic have to play AIK I think, difficult.

As long as Morelos keeps being a loony they can't sell him, so they should do alright, that guy seems pretty elite at that level.

Scotland's woman manager got into trouble for coming back pished and mocking the players after they got knocked out lol

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what a qt3.14

>Scottish """women"""

DONUT post this again

the Welsh countryside looks so COMFY lads

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For me its Leigh Nicol

Spurs just adding some depth to their formerly too thin squad will make them end up with 80+ points. They just need to keep Eriksen Rose and Alderweireld.

+3
-2

Did twice in my professional life and twice it led to a maelstrom of shit.
Once I proved an anticonsumerist leftist lesbian that her only moments of joy were from her commodity consumptions. She ended up crying in front of everyone. I felt sorry and still regret it.

If Spurs don't win on Saturday then I don't believe they can win the league

>tfw Abraham comes home to the villa in January for the measly sum of 5mil

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>comes home

Will you hurl racist abuse if he misses a pen?

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He's fucking shit anyway

Yeah, Morelos is perfect for SPLel. Would be El Hadji Diouf 2.0 in England.

No, we'll just sing our ill advised version of black betty

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kek that's pretty nice

why hasnt my fpl updated yet

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At youre mom's house

You’ve been banned

what did my team 'mboko fc' do to deserve such injustice

how are aberdeen so bad?

stagnation and losing strikers to salford city

Celtic are league 1 tier
Rangers are league 2 tier
All other Scottish teams are non league tier.

>Basel striker Ricky van Wolfswinkel is undergoing treatment for a brain aneurysm that was only discovered after he had scans following a concussion.

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He remembered this.

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Unironically rated him. Dunno how he performed so badly.

hughton completely fucked up his tactics

most norwich games that season had wolfswinkel and hooper alternating as strikers rather than both being played at the same time

Ah so suffered from Emery syndrome, where kept dropping the Laca + Auba combo despite everybody in the team and the two FW's saying they want to play together. I doubt signing Pepe is gonna fix that either.

He went on to bang in a fair amount of goals for Vitesse and shit.

do you ever get bored posting plastic football?

Apparently he could be out for up to a year

Got lucky though really. He should be sending flowers to the LASK player that twatted him

yh agreed

>felt sorry and still regret it.
Weekmind

No, just like we don't get bored pointing out you tried to diddle your own underage niece lol.

Wolves could realistically win the EL

Don’t reply to fat welsh cunt 190

Put a bet on it then

No fatty

Chelsea will win it again

United will win

>no hazard
I don't think so.

Spurs will tactically drop out of the CL and win it

win what

>Championship team in the Champions league

Would be neat

the Europa League

oof Chelsea fans arent gonna like this post

It's alright, they'll be spurs fans next season

chelsea will finish 6th stop being delusional

Making others realise how pathetic they are is useless.

Think you're the one being delusional mate, your squad is about as talented as Bournemouth's

>your
anyway the squad still better than your evertons and your lesters
it's the manager who'll cause them problems

Nah.
>1: City/Liverpool
>2: City/Liverpool
>3: Spurs
>4: United
>5: Wolves
>6: Burnley/Chelsea
>7: Chelsea/Burnley
>8: Everton
>9: Lestah
>10: Arsenal

>ITV have announced they will broadcast three La Liga matches live on ITV4 at the start of the new season.

0 PLs m8

>Dejan Lovren has reportedly agreed terms with Roma ahead of a possible €25m transfer (Sky Sports Italia)
25 FUCKING MILLION

The seeth in this post is wonderful

Potentially huge moment that. First time live top flight football will have been on "terrestrial TV" since the PL started.

any good ones?

>he cares about la liga

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>The broadcaster showed live top-flight Spanish matches at the end of last season after previous rights holders Eleven Sports cut short their agreement.

>ITV will also show weekly La Liga highlights throughout the season on both ITV and ITV4.

>Live coverage begins with Barcelona's trip to Athletic Bilbao on Friday.

>Barcelona's first home game against Real Betis on 25 August will also be shown live, before Real Madrid's trip to Villarreal is aired on the following weekend (1 September).

>BBC Sport understands that negotiations are ongoing between La Liga and ITV for the broadcast of live matches throughout the rest of the season.

>Live coverage begins with Barcelona's trip to Athletic Bilbao on Friday. Barcelona's first home game against Real Betis on 25 August will also be shown live, before Real Madrid's trip to Villarreal is aired on the following weekend (1 September).

It's fairly obvious who's going to be live most weeks. So it won't be like when Sky had the rights and they showed near-enough every game possible so you had shit like Extremadura v Osasuna on.

Imagine being so hilariously clueless

Shut the fuck up, zoomer. He's pretty good but that's all. You can make an entire squad of better defenders from the past 15 years alone

Provide the evidence otherwise and I'll gladly accept I was wrong.

Ah shit, I forgot about Football Italia on Channel 4. That had live Serie A matches.

Someone sort a new thread. /HTFC/ edition preferably

>/HTFC/ edition preferably

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They aren't a PL team.

Haha!

>Ojo involved in all Rangers goals
Based.

new when ready:

New

Kek. For me, it’s htfc

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ha
eat shit