/nfl/ General - Eli's Last Chance Edition

SF: Garoppolo throws 5 INTs in Wednesday practice
CLE: Report: Odell Beckham battling a hip pointer
MIN: Vikings trying to trade Laquon Treadwell
PHI: JJ Arcega-Whiteside 'could factor in 2019'
HOU: Clowney deal would be around 5 years, $110m
SF: George Kittle (calf tightness) is day to day
SEA: Chris Carson to see two-thirds of RB touches
TB: Bucs working on restoring RoJo's confidence
NE: Damien Harris battling 'minor' hand injury
MIA: Flores hopes to have Drake (foot) for Week 1

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=YjjLw4qypw0
twitter.com/BrookelynnML/status/1161793851163578368
youtu.be/RmJ-Cy4QBsE
nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000940697/article/cardinals-gm-keim-jailed-suspended-for-extreme-dui
twitter.com/barstoolsports/status/1161823667145314308?s=20
deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2019-tennessee-titans-1837169891
twitter.com/ParkerLewisJR/status/1162042340921315328?s=20
youtube.com/watch?v=iwd8N6K-sLk
streamable.com/9qqzb
archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/filename/youdumbfuck/
archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/filename/vargmutt/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

Why is this an issue?

Who said it was one?

posting for Old Bay

3li will become a reality this season. How does that make you feel?

would be one of the most based things to happen in a few years

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*wins the AFC South in Luck’s absence*

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>paying Clowney $110 million
This has to be a joke right? The dude still hasn't managed more than 10 sacks in a single season.

Brady might actually kill Eli right there on the field.

Consider suicide.

>sacks is all that matters

What a brainlet

I'm sure that's divided over seven season, right? r-right?

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Michael Bennett is half as good again as Clowney lul

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Apologize

i mean hey he almost crippled nick foles during one of his chimpouts if that counts for anything

Why do people act like Clowney isn't a pro bowler? Just because Mack turned out better and the Texans got memed doesn't mean he's bad. Tons of teams pay big dollars to de/lb that are around his skill level. Are you all retarded?

Still a waste of money

Going by both his measurables and by how much attention teams give Watt, he shouldn't be playing like a much slower version of Michael Bennett

If the Texans drafted Aaron donald:
>AFCCG 2015: Texans vs Broncos, Broncos win but Peyton gets injured. The panthers win Super Bowl 50
>Super Bowl 51 is Texans vs Falcons, Texans win
>Super Bowl 52 is patriots vs vikings, Vikings win
>Super Bowl 53 is Texans vs Saints, Texans win

>vikings win

>no

>vikings winning a superb owl
>ever

jej

I'm seriously considering putting down some money on the NFL in 2019. There are, in my opinion, heavily skewed odds. Stupidly so against certain teams and some teams have a silly level of faith behind them.

For example, the Panthers are only being given 25-1 odds to make the Super Bowl and 50-1 to win it. The same odds as the fucking Jacksonville Jaguars. I think that is way undervaluing the team that I have seen so far. Cam was already on course to hit the playoffs last year when his arm was fucked. I think putting down 200 dollars on that for a possible return of 10,000 is actually excellent. I'm trying to give myself reasons NOT to do it. On top of that I can get 9/2 odds that the Panthers win the division. Panthers below the fucking FALCONS this year for odds.

Also looking for action against the Bears who are being stupidly overvalued. 13/2 odds of making the Super Bowl and 14/1 to win it. That's just fucking insane given how easy their schedule was last year and inflated their record and also how terrible Mitch Trubisky is and how reliant the team will be on him to win a Super Bowl. Even with a top 3 defense, winning with a quarterback that poor is basically impossible. I want to take all possible action against the Bears winning that I can.

I think I'm just going to take the plunge and go all in on this. Not for Panthers to win the SB, but to win the division/make the NFCCG and for the Bears to not even make the playoffs.

>sneak

>MIN: Vikings trying to trade Laquon Treadwell

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>Your team
>what you ate for dinner
>last time you took a shit
>your top 3 most overrated teams heading into the season

Ill start:

Raiders
Chicken tacos
Took a crazy shit like 20 mins ago
1. Jets
2. Panthers
3. Cowboys

Your turn spee

panthers division win and bears missing playoffs are okay bets. not shoe ins, but certainly plausible. i wouldnt drop a lot of cash though. instead start with keeping track of bets you would like to make and see how they actually turn out, so you can get a little experience. People dropping fat cash as their starting bets and getting burned is the fuel vegas runs on

Because he's not as good as the money he demands and he's never lived up to his expectations. He's a great run stopper, but you don't pay 20m a year for a run stopper

Chiefs
BBQ Turkey
Forgot desu
Cowboys, Ravens, Bears

>Patriots
>Not Football
>Not Football
>1. Chargers
>2. Bears
>3. 49ers

Pats
Hungarian goulash and egg noodles
Saints
Chiefs
Cowboys

Seahawks
Spaghetti and roasted broccoli
About 7 hours ago
1. Bears
2. Browns
3. Rams

who the fuck would give them anything for him? he's trash and all the teams know the vikings aren't going to waste a roster spot on him

>The most significant adjustment Rodgers faces in this system is dealing with the amount of pre-snap motion. Last season, the Titans used some sort of motion on 56 percent of their offensive plays, which was one of the higher rates in the league, according to Sports Info Solutions. Green Bay was at the other end of the spectrum at just 27 percent. Without much movement before the snap, Rodgers was able to diagnose relatively static defenses. In LaFleur’s scheme, the Packers want the defense to change, which limits the time Rodgers has to make late adjustments.
bear in mind rodgers used a lot of presnap motion in the 2016 stretch when he was blowing defenses up (primarily out of the pistol/gun)

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>>Your team
>>what you ate for dinner
pot roast
>>last time you took a shit
who cares you fucking weirdo
>>your top 3 most overrated teams heading
into the season
colts
eagles
bears

>MIN: Vikings trying to trade Laquon Treadwell
1998 honda civic for sale, 14,000$ asking
get the fuck out of here. BB might take him for a 7th maybeeeeeeee.

no idea. i hope they trade him for a waffle

wait why lol that seemed a lil bit uncalled for, you would like me if you met me haha

Having anything positive to say about Old Gay is a pretty bad sign for our friendship.

>The NFL has shifted to more single-high safety alignments and man coverage in the secondary in the past few years, and more motion allows the offense to take advantage of those one-on-one matchups and makes defenders question their assignments. “What this offense does is that it really stresses you with crossing routes and release patterns,” Rodgers says. “Because you’re adding a motion and making a defense figure out, is he gonna be the no. 1, no. 2, no. 3 [receiver]? And what type of release pattern is gonna happen at that moment?”
>LaFleur has also adopted McVay’s preference for play-action. Among qualified QBs last season, Goff led the league by using play-action on 35.8 percent of his dropbacks (according to Pro Football Focus). Under LaFleur in Tennessee, Marcus Mariota finished third at 32.1 percent. Rodgers ranked 29th out of 37 QBs at just 20.1 percent. In McCarthy’s shotgun-heavy scheme—Green Bay used shotgun on 71 percent of its offensive plays last season, the eighth-highest rate in the league—the Packers didn’t have many runs tied to their play-action concepts, which hampered the amount of deception a play fake could create. LaFleur, on the other hand, pairs the run and pass actions in an effort to make every play initially appear the same. “This offense is all about multiple looks and multiple plays from the same look,” Rodgers says. “So you have an action, you have a run, you have a keep, and you have a shot play out of the same look.”
Rodgers used much more play action in 2016 and 2014, and is one of the most productive quarterbacks doing so
>LaFleur and other Shanahan disciples run much of their offense under center. The Rams ran 63 percent of their plays under center last season, which led the NFL; Kyle Shanahan’s 49ers ranked second at 56 percent; and LaFleur’s Titans ranked fifth at 49 percent

okay sorry but I think we can recover here haha

Okay, just don't do that again. It's not even funny to joke about that. Let's start over.

How have the injuries Rodgers has suffered the past two years affected his ability to scramble/improvise and make streetball plays? Every time Rodgers is in a big spot it feels like he always tries some slippery bullshit with his legs and for some reason no defense ever puts a spy on him.

>dolphins
>chicken teriyaki
>this morning
>1. Dallas 2. Jets 3. Baltimore

Ravens and hargay bout to find out they were flacco babbys allllllll along

>49ers
?
People are rating them?

Flacco is pretty bad but he's better than Lamar. Baltimore unfortunately seemed to look over the fact that Flacco took on all of their difficult games and the majority of their road games and Lamar got a cake walk other than the Chiefs and Chargers, where he went 1-1. I genuinely believe the Ravens were better off with Flacco even with his mediocrity. I would have liked their odds more this year with Flacco.

Yeah, a lot of people have them pegged as an NFC Wild Card or surging team with the return of Jimmy G.

>6. Bills

>There was some speculation this offseason that the Packers’ shotgun-heavy tendencies were a direct result of a Rodgers decree, but he says that isn’t the case. The Packers used shotgun 63 percent of the time in 2017 in part because Rodgers broke his collarbone and backup Brett Hundley was much more comfortable in the gun. And last season, Green Bay was forced into the shotgun because Rodgers broke his leg in a Week 1 win over the Bears and couldn’t physically pull out from under center. “I think that was a necessity instead of a philosophy,” Rodgers says. He points to his history of playing under center in junior college, during his college career at Cal—even in his early days with the Packers.
his leg injury lingered throughout the year and never really healed until late season. The jets game is a good example of vintage rodgers dabbing on a bad defense though. If you watch tape from 2017, the packers went 4-1 with rodgers putting up MVP numbers, but it was a very frustrating packers offense to watch because the couldnt move the ball until rodgers pulled out some magic about every 3rd down and carried that team. Rodgers stuck in the pocket last year really exposed the packers scheme, especially protection scheme, the same way I would imagine the texans would if watson was stuck in a cast. Rodgers has claimed now his leg feels great though, and his calf injury in 2014 never came back either

Hourly reminder that Jimmy G is a bust and the 49ers will trade him for Brady and a box of crackerjacks next offseason

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It's going to be funny when, despite all of this change and strategy and talk and citing stats, the Packers still finish 7-9.

>implying the Patriots will trade back for Jimmy G
>implying Belichick didn't laugh and hang up on the 49ers when they asked for Brady instead of Jimmy G
Nah. Patriots will see if Brady has hit the cliff yet and if he hasn't resign him for 30M. They'll keep doing that til' he sucks, and then Brady will probably retire rather than uproot to a new team.

Lying in Bed Thinking about the New York Jets

Gonna cry?

youtube.com/watch?v=YjjLw4qypw0

I'm hungry now

They have a chance desu. This year we either find out Sam Darnold was a slightly late bloomer, or we find out he's a slow agonizing death for the Jets

>usc qbs
lol

>They have a chance desu

No pass rush, no secondary, no o-line. They'll be lucky to split with the Bills and Fins

Falcons have the best offense in the NFL

wake me up when julio is effective in the red zone

Youre going to be a big sleepy boi then

>And then user just...drifted off. Forever.

fuck off. it was all sark's fault and he's gone now

>SF: Garoppolo throws 5 INTs in Wednesday practice
Who gives a shit? It's a fucking practice. This is our year

Get the feeling the 49ers gonna be so shit they nab Tua

Holy shit, I just realized Richard Sherman isn't dead.

I want you guys to know, that no matter what, everything in this world, is a rich man's trick.

I want you to realize that thinking such things is the result of an overactive imagination and a lack of fulfillment in your own life. I also want you to realize that Aaron Rodgers is gay.

>its just practice
>its just preseason
>its just week one
>its just his first year back from injury
>its just his second season if you go by games played
>cut that bum

I typed up your responses for the next 36 months feel free to ctrl+c

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>So if you're form Wisconsin does that make you a "Cracker with Cheese"?
Why does him being from Wisconsin matter? Isn't the foam cheese hat enough to just have this joke be "...Cracker with cheese?"

Imagine thinking that creature on the left is something that anyone aspires to be. That's why this comic doesn't work. After a lifetime of consuming propanda they can only crudely emulate it without being able to understand how and why it is effective.

That and I would beat the fucking brakes off of his ass if he tried to talk shit about my packers jersey or make some stupid fucking monkey joke about me being a cracker. So would anyone up here. We don't put up with that shit here in the north, you'd get those stupid sunglasses beat right off of your face.

Shut up, cracker.

Lose weight fatass

SF will have a ELITE DEFENSE SCREENCAP THIS

You seem pretty invested in watching Garoppolo fail. I hate to tell you this, but he has more than Kittle to throw it to.

Defensive line is going to be fucking nasty. Not just becausre of all the pass rushers, but guys like Julian Taylor, Sheldon Day, Kentavius Street, are going to destroy rushing attacks.

Fuck you, bitch

Be quiet, Packercracker.

Wow i guess youre one of the smarter mokeys around these parts huh?

It's a nigger that understood the post he was responding to and basically you're all retarded

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Imagine actually taking the time to make this image when people make these kind of confident posts like a thousand times a year.

>SF: Garoppolo throws 5 INTs in Wednesday practice
Brady was worried Jimmy G would take his job, when in actuality Jimmy GQ was going after a greater legend, the man the myth, Nathan Peterman.

OH NO NO
i didn't make it :)

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Azor Nick Mullens

Shut up, cracker.

Do you think he'll be traded or cut? If so, where do you think he'll land. I see the Bucs as a good place with Arians and they'll have good cap space in 2020

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what's his end game? the cowboys offered him $30 million a year and if he walks in free agency other teams will offer him less than that

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After Arians cuts Jameis and gives a 2nd and 3rd for Carr the Buccs will be eternally a 6-9 win team
He wants money but hes an idiot if he thinks he actually earned anything over 27 million a year

It’s called negotiating nigga. The cowboys came to the table first with 30, now he’s upping the offer to 40 so they come up to 32, then he goes down to 37, then they go “34.5 and I can’t go a penny more” then he hesitates and says “...would you go 36?” And they say “No, 34.5, that’s literally as high as it can go.” The he hesitates again and says “alright you got a deal” they shake hands and Chumley writes up the check behind the counter.

Pants Owl

twitter.com/BrookelynnML/status/1161793851163578368

Hourly reminder that Philly is a nig infested shithole that should be hydrogen bombed out of existence

>driving into work
>stomach starts grumbling
>have to shit
>starts rumbling worse and worse with each passing minute
>can barely contain my asshole
>speed up to 100mph to get to work
>run to the bathroom
>sit on the toilet
>nothing
>chill there for 15 minutes
>no more grumbling or need to shit

What the fuck?

>eagles vs jags
>Jets vs falcons
>Bengals vs Redskins
>Packers vs Ravens
>Raiders vs Cards

Which game tonight will be the most entertaining?

Your body re absorbed the poo. You are now at increased risk for bacterial infection. Next time pull over and poo at gas station

I'll enjoy watching Lameme get fucked and Rodgers performing mediocrely

Anyone know sites that offer preseason betting? I'd drop $100 that no more than 10 points are score in the jags game

Ah, so Rogers is being forced to do more than ad-lib by extending plays. Maybe next they'll work on timing routes with receivers and tossing into tight windows like other elite QBs?

>6. Bills

>5. Bills

>betting on preseason games
peak degeneracy

hello newfriend, enjoy your first season of football!

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU
Sick of you faggots laughing and refusing to post your own, worse, takes. Eat shit.

>mfw the most famous player for the Buffalo Bills is a murderer

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>no BDN
>Clayton Thorson will play a significant portion of the game
Eagles-Jags will be a shitfest

To be fair, OJ's wife deserved it for being a cheating cunt

Is there any chance Treadwell improves on another team like Breshad Perryman?

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Michael Thomas, Tyreek Hill, Tyler Boyd, Sterling Shepard all drafted after at WR. Corey Coleman, Josh Doctson and Will Fuller drafted before him. No idea how everyone fucked up rating WR's for the draft that year so badly

If you root for a team whose name starts with a C, you should fucking kill yourself.

None. He's a straight bust.

Like the city or nickname?

>if you root for a team

He’s the complete opposite of the type of qb Arians likes

Not likely, he just can’t separate

It’s okay, I was already going to anyway with Luck dead again

>chefs
>chorgers
>clots
>cuckboys
>cards
Checks out

Unfortunately

>a hot football gf will never brap in your face

>Carolina Panthers
>Chicago Bears
>Cminnesota Cvikings
Agreed

SEETHE

Bodycam footage of the Cards executive that got popped for DUI:

youtu.be/RmJ-Cy4QBsE

>Cardinals
I should care...why?

nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000940697/article/cardinals-gm-keim-jailed-suspended-for-extreme-dui
What the fuck is with Arizona and alcoholism? Is it really that bad living there?

Because we drafted a generational talent at QB and we're poised to storm the league

Arizona's government can't budget for shit. They rely heavily on DUI and other fines, as well as, police asset seizures to supplement local and state budgets

Someone link me the lastest Hard Knocks in 1080p

Serious berds

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*makes an absolutely abhorrent post that derails discussion*

How does Antonio Brown manage to stay on the news every single goddamn day?

are they talking about drafting a manlet?

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>3. Bills

By doing something impressively stupid every day.

Maybe. Kyler could win a few games this year, even being a manlet.

>1. Bills

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We’re coming for you :)

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More like defenses be coming for Darnold. Dude has no O-line.

If it came between the Bills and the Jets to take over the AFC East when Brady retires, I'd bet on the Bills.

Screencapped for when we make the playoffs
Niggers

I'd bet on the Jets. Darnold will wind up better than Allen almost guaranteed. Bills won't always have a top end defense to keep them from sinking into 2-14 misery to hide their offensive ineptitude. Jets are the more promising team as long as they build a few problems away.

Although actually, I'm betting the Patriots mostly remain at the top.

>Jets
>playoffs
AAAAHAHAHAAHAHA

RENT

FREE

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Here's a trivia question: what did Joel Klatt say here to make Colin Cowherd make this face?

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Why don't cowboy fans stfu about Beastly already? He's done with your shit franchise.

>84 million United States dollars, guaranteed

Kirk Cousins isn't the problem on the Vikings. He's a good quarterback. He has some issues to fix, but they're fixable issues. Y'all won't be able to say shit once we win the division again this year.

I would as well but we all know it would actually be the dolphins.

Go ahead and put your life's savings on the panthers this season. Nothing could go wrong!

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your average sheep can't get sam darnolds dick out of thier mouth.

MANLETS ON SUICIDE WATCH

twitter.com/barstoolsports/status/1161823667145314308?s=20

At least Cam isn't retarded enough to buy an $8 million dollar diamond thinking it's a good investment

Manlet bout to fuck your division up.

It says 200 dollars.

I never heard him talk before. He seems like kind of an asshole.

This is a 27 year old man. This is how badly living in Buffalo ages you

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Good one. I saw that joke yesterday as well.

I'd rather have an asshole than some robot attempting to mimic human emotions like Russell and Kirk

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>sam darnold 4-9
>josh allen 5-6

B-bbut guys if anyone will win the AFCE Its the jets.

>52.8% completion rate

Literal trash. Lamar is a sharpshooter compared to Allen

>team records rookie year
>mattering
Allen also had a top 3 defense behind him and his team still crashed and burned. Darnold had absolutely nothing.

Darnold will wind up being better than Allen in the long run, guaranteed.

It's up

deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2019-tennessee-titans-1837169891

They were divorced.

>peyton manning 3-13
lmao he'll never win anything

What is this and why should I care? It reads like something sassy twitter liberals pass around.

>Brees' downfield accuracy dramatically declined in 2018

BALDING FRAUD

And darnold still has absolutely nothing? And allen still has the best D in the league? So please tell me again who is more likely to win afce outside of Pat's? See how delusional you faggots are.

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when did perryman improve

Deadspin gets shit on here, and it's fair, but Why Your Team Sucks is usually pretty good

>catches literally every ball thrown at him

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Not really. It's the same joke over and over.

Michael Thomas has never made a difficult catch his entire career.

Do people on Yea Forums really think the Jets D has no talent? Is this the level of retard on this board?

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I believe in the jets because I really like the chemistry being built with darnold and crowder. also quinnen is gonna be a stud for years

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hey guys, I forgot how many Super Bowl rings Tom Brady has. Can someone remind me?

>having talent
>still having a shit defense

Pick 2

just got a nike jersey from NFL shop
I got a small so I could wear it like a t shirt
anyone know anything about the sizing? I forgot what kind of nike it was but whatever the cheap one is. Legend I think.
I dont want something thats fuck huge made to fit over pads.

A 3 year timeline from drafting a bust to officially declaring him a bust

First year:
>"I think he has a chance to be a good player"
>"We are trying to do things right and not put him out there before he is ready"
>"He is still thinking too much"
>"He still thinks a little bit about the number of steps to take on each route"
>"He needs to continue to do better in practice"
>"Its about time he starts getting some plays"
>"I still have hope for Laquon"
>"He is plenty healthy now, last few weeks he's just been catching up to the NFL"
>"He might have been pressing too much, but he is a hard worker"
>"He is making great strides but we will see if it translates into catches"
>"It's consistency, when he came in, he was inconsistent"
>"I see too many good qualities from him to not believe he is going to be a good player"
>"He is a guy that has to get better"
>"I think he just needs to relax and be an athlete"
>"He was pressing as a rookie"
>"He can't worry if he drops a ball, move on to the next play"
>(On a fight he got into in camp) "It wasn't too smart"
>"A few weeks ago he got the message not to work out so hard"

Second year:
>"He needs to get his shit figured out or he's done"
>"He needs to get out if his own way, he has had every opportunity to succeed, It's up to him, one of these days you either got to get it figured out or maybe it's time for a change of scenery I guess"
>"He is his own worst enemy"
>"It's an important year for him"
>"He has caught the ball well this spring"
>"He has done a really good job in camp"
>"He needs to catch the ball, that is the number one thing receivers do... catch the ball"
>"He was trying to run before he caught the ball"
>(On Treadwell being a healthy scratch) "It came down to matchups"

Third year:
>(On blindside block in the preseason) "It's ridiculous, I showed the team that exact play, we can't do that
>Vikings have made former 1st round bust, WR Laquon Treadwell available for trade, according to Albert Breer

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If you get a legit jersey, they'll run bigger/looser than normal shirts. A small jersey would fit more like a medium t-shirt.

>180 replies
>only 7 good posts in the thread (including this one)
absolute dire state of /nfl/

Nike's jerseys tend to run smaller than other jerseys. If you usually wear a small jersey, a medium jersey might work better with Nike.

The Legend jerseys are much more like a normal T-Shirt though. Very elastic and comfortable and you can even wear it on a hot day.

perfect. thats exactly what I wanted.
its just gonna be my outdoors shirt for hiking.

GETFUCKINGSET

since you know football so well you fucking muslim faggot why dont you tell me who you want to take the #3 spot then
go ahead. lookup the depth charts and pick a name at random my somali friend.

Double check the cut though. I've seen some jerseys that are cut like regular t-shirts so they aren't baggy. Most regular jerseys will be baggy and have huge neck and arm openings.

Me?
Im the best, so you already know its time for TYBC.

You?
Garbage. So sit your ass down.

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>94802393(You)
Chad Beebe is a lock for 3rd rec you mong.

Imagine being so pathetic you actually use a trip.

Are you suffering from CTE?

Landry Jones to the XFL. If they got Manziel and Kaepernick it would be legitimately great.

based

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Based
TYBC

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yeah well at least my CTE came from a helmet and offroading without a seatbelt instead of the padding on my headboard wearing out while some nigger rails me from behind you fucking waste of genetics

>getashit is back with his pol shit and general retardation
Why won't he just fuck off forever

whining about it always helps
>josh allen and sam darnold both give the patriots a loss this year
cap it.

Eagles
Oats and honey bar
3 hours ago
Cowboys
Browns
Rams

Which bars?

THESE GODLIKE THINGS

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OH NO NO NO NO NO

Attached: xfl.png (609x214, 20K)

:(

Eagles
Orzo with feta and some sauteed veggies
Yesterday in the afternoon at work
Cowboys, Ravens, Jets

>Backup that has played 5 games
The XFL is going to tank so hard.

Carr had a good completion % alongside 4K+ pass yards. He didn't get a lot of TD because Gruden's scheme is difficult to get a hold off, the O-line played like shit (60+ sacks allowed) alongside the absense of good WRs.
When taking this into consideration Carr's talent can't be questioned.
This offseason the Raiders got 2 excelent WR's and have somewhat improved the O-line. When taking into account the fact that this is Carr's 2nd season under Gruden's scheme I'd say he'll end up his career as a Raider.

Insults are based on insecurities. Maybe lay off the porn

>Raiders have signed FA QB Brett Favre

What is /nfl/ listening right now?

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>cowboys
>chicken fajitas
>on the john literally shitposting right now
Lotta cowboys haters currently on
>Eagles
>Ravens
>Bears

Artie Langes standup

nothing but graham parsons, emmylou harris, morrissey and the clash for about a month now.

The Troop audiobook. It's a horror novel that's pretty good so far

Has he done anything new since the suicide attempt?

Nope. One in 09 and one in like I wanna say 15. Have you seen his nose? Its fully collapsed. One of the saddest stories I've ever watched develop tbdesu. Dude wasted some crazy talent

Jurassic 5

M4Sonic - Virus whilst I fix my laptop

Oh also the history of Rome podcast, this shit is gr8.

>beating bears and packers for 1st
Lol. Gonna be fun watching him shit the bed against >MY defense again this year. Maybe this time Khalil Mack will get the pick six instead of Eddie. Perhaps both of them? Maybe a D lineman. So many possibilities, I cant wait.

What the fuck is this guy's problem?

twitter.com/ParkerLewisJR/status/1162042340921315328?s=20

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>wearing regular office clothes
>get some coffee
>tell them my name is Michael
>see pic related

How the fuck did they know?

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cool blog michael

post predictions

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Probably the smell when you walked in.

>2nd seed doesn't get a buy
Wat

The Bears get caught for stealing team playbooks around week 14 and have their bye taken from them as punishment.

Just...literally everything about this is wrong and strange.

Why is Eli Manning still a starting QB?

Because Mara is a sentimental fuck

18-1

I dont know the huge G sticker and GB license plate you put on your 2002 chevy blazer that you pull into starbucks every morning blaring classic rock radio might have tipped them off

Attached: EliAverageManning.jpg (900x900, 160K)

>Giants' rosters post-Super Bowl XLVI are among the worst in the league
>"Why is Eli so terrible"

In other words...

ELI JUST NEEDS MORE HELP

He'll never have anything on the myth, the man, the legend.

Attached: Whodat.jpg (900x900, 156K)

NAYTHAN THROW THE FUCKIN BALL

>cuckold muttloid obsessed with white penis still posting
yikes

check out the stats just a bit down in the comments. Cherry pick much?

>Spicatan is back
based

seething

I want him to be a bust because he was picked ahead of Watson. You need to do better so we can all laugh at him, user.

>pff aww yeah i hate the guy i just want you guys to come up with better insults
0 people fell for this

Just a reminder that Carson Wentz can't throw to the right...

Attached: CW.jpg (900x900, 161K)

...and Nick Foles can't throw to the left.

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suck my dick mutt

Attached: vargmutt.gif (403x360, 112K)

...and Trubisky can't throw... down the middle?

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Hrs asking if you meant the city like Chicago or the nickname mine Cardinals, RETARDED POOPFACE

>103.9
>yellow

>68 passer rating or lower past 20 yards
>zero zones at or above average past 20 yards
More accurate to say he can't throw long period.

Trubiskys gonna be better this season but he comes off as a blockhead in mic'd up/interviews

Attached: 1556243107935.png (1022x789, 1.28M)

This is shopped, I can tell by the pixels, and I've seen quite a few shops in my day

This was just because he was in Buffalo. Once carr goes down he will be unleashed.

Man I hope so, Swag Kelly is the man.

Kendrick Scott Oracle

>your team
Stoolers

>what you ate for dinner
Pussy

>last time you took a shit
Taking at the moment

>your top 3 most overrated teams heading into the season
Browns, ravens, cowboys

What does this image remind you of?

Attached: 20171228_045248.png (272x366, 172K)

He's gone. He's only on that team cause Jim Kelly is great friends with frank reich.

Someone plz post duck poopscott. I'd like to see where he believes hes worth 40 mil

He's consistent, as you would probably expect.

Attached: DP.jpg (900x900, 159K)

Guess hes worth 40 mil. Thx for posting

It's so fucking easy, god damn

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ELITE

>Dak isn't nearly as good as muh Wentz!
>his team carries him!
>p-please ignore that the eagles won a superbowl after Wentz was injured and that he's never been to the post season.

It's way to simplistic to say "he can't throw right." One, you meant deep right. Two, how many deep threat receivers did he have? How often did they line up on the left/right? What were the play calls that sent his receivers to that area of the field, and what were the scenarios?

Post carr's?

>green/yellow for deep balls
And how many deep throws did he make? He doesn't seem to go deep a lot, and when he does his deep ball does not pass the eye test.

Other than their rookie season where the Eagles o-line was fucked and they had no offensive weapons, Wentz's numbers are significantly better than Dak's.

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>numbers better on a stacked team that didn't even need him
>can't finish a season

DINKIN AND DAKIN

Attached: skeeeeeeeyyyyyuuuuuuupppppp.png (488x702, 304K)

Both play behind excellent o-lines, I don't know why idiots point them out when debating the two

Dak's 2017 analysis

Attached: DP2.jpg (900x900, 160K)

I talk a lot of shit on the cowboys but the Front office and players are all being smart about this
>Im a dual threat QB pay me
youre a halfrican that needs a RB to actually do something. where the fuck are you gonna go? what team is gonna take you? who is gonna pay you? please tell me which team wants a fucking mulatto that moves his lips when he reads?
>I'z be da best RB in da league massah, pay me
youre a fucking rape ape thats done nothing but get in trouble. get suspended. get blackmailed by women. arrested. youre a fucking true 13%er in the fact that youre just a liability that will inevitably get charged with something. oh and davorius, markwan, ledavian and half of america's public housing population are willing to take your place with 80% of the same results on the field with our O line.
>I really am a #1 WR when Im used right, pay me
fuck you. we got a quadroon baboon at QB and paying you is like buying beluga caviar for cat food. its a fucking luxury we cant afford and wont be appreciated.

good job on the jones. good job on the players.
I'd say dont pay zeke. let him be the odd man out.
let someone else give 40 million to demarco murray 2.0

Dak's 2016 performance.

Attached: DP3.jpg (900x900, 164K)

/elite/.

Attached: passer-rating-vs-league-avg_SMI031126_2018-reg-all_1545936958858 (3).jpg (900x900, 160K)

>brown shitskin pretending to be white now
lmao the state of this muttloid

whiter than you mutt

BERDS

Attached: 3E538EB2-3D99-48F2-AD72-A1FABC2F0BC0.png (383x444, 353K)

börds

Attached: börds.png (797x835, 99K)

F

Attached: clot.png (583x214, 21K)

Which team has the highest amount of white players? Cowboys? Patriots? I’m trying to support a team based on that criteria.

Clots hype was a joke anyway.

>no, you
lmao the state of this white dick obsessed muttloid

bungles did last year, unironically.

my last (You) to (You) obsessed mutt.

Attached: 1564909671352.jpg (236x236, 12K)

I'm not that guy, may I please have a You?

TOP 5
>TOP 5
TOP 5
>TOP 5
TOP 5
>TOP 5

& might I say, the Best? I mean who's secondary is better?

>xecucks already running scared

Wilson wont throw a single touchdown pass against us this season, Pete already saw the writing on the wall switching to a run heavy offense lol

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Attached: 1506827905504.png (553x562, 20K)

Nanners
and no Chandler Jones won't kill Jimmy

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I miss NRC.

>no, you again!
can you say something else you shitskin?

>I mean who's secondary is better?

Excluding the pass rush. Pats maybe due to Belichick magic.

Including the pass rush. Jags are pretty solid.

Not sure, but the Patriots are perceived to be the whitest team.

Attached: 1549252108065.jpg (1750x1270, 1.18M)

Da Bears would like a word.

did the Rams fix their weak Linebackers yet?

Pats is better. Do the Aints still have an elite secondary?

LOL

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O U

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btw fren i did post last night i just post with Venture Bros screenshots for the majority of the time now.

Lmao what retard made this?

LITERALLY Yea Forums'S RETARDED PREDICTIONS

>packers
Lol autoshit list

Wrong. Official Yea Forums predictions.

Attached: 2019PO.png (1896x840, 857K)

>Nanners
>8-8
you know what i'll take it

That explains it. I’ll try to remember to let the crew know later

It's like it was made by the most casual Aaron Rodgers fan in existence. Basically boils down to last year with these minor changes

+Browns + Steelers - Texans -Ravens
+Packers -Seahawks

There is no way in fuck it works out that predictably, and picking the PACKERS as your team to make a stab at the playoffs is a joke.

wow and to think the chiefs might actually be legitimately dangerous enough for 14 wins

ignoring the cowkeks winning this is the most normalnigger prediction ever
>everyone that's suppose to be good will get more wins than they're projected to
>everyone thats suppose to suck will really suck
this will lose at least 20/32 going up against vegas win projections guaranteed

Cowcucks will win. Wentz injured by week 8

>0 division winners below 11 wins
>3/4 WC teams 11 win teams
based retard

Even tripfags do better than this, absolutely repulsive.

what game we watching tonight, boys?

Skins implosion prob cause its what's on my cable

>Your team
Niners
>what you ate for dinner
Tacos
>last time you took a shit
4 days ago
>your top 3 most overrated teams heading into the season

(No order)
1. Browns (I think they'll be good but they're being way overhyped)
2. Bears (trubisky is not very good, defense and play calling covered for him)
3. Jets/cowboys (jets need a few more years to grow. Cowboys have a great team overall, but will never win an owl with dak. Too safe, struggles when playing from behind, tunnel vision aka doesn't see the field well and the open man 30 yards downfield)

Bengals-Redskins

Attached: AB.png (553x562, 29K)

some IG cowboys page trying to masquerade as a worse PFF

No lol

No lol

he unironically wasted his whole career in a shithole

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lolno

>implying Nate Studfeld won't bootyblast the Pats

You have to be stuck in an elevator for 12 hours with either Dan Snyder, Jerry Jones, or Mark Davis. Who do you choose?

have one friend

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>PHI: JJ Arcega-Whiteside 'could factor in 2019'
ROTY

Attached: 1515639209933.gif (400x400, 673K)

Anyone watching the jest tonight? I'm out of interest if Valentine "the LeBron James of Rugby" Holmes can get a run make some more highlights.

jerry easy. talk about the good old days. players. arkansas. nailing girls in your 70s.
he's at least fun. snyder would try and tell me how israel is our greatest ally for hours and mark davis seems unsettling in person.

Really all I would care about is the money anyway

No one ever found an image of AB's miscolored helmet huh?

It was on twitter but it didn't look that bad, so it didn't blow up. The pattern was fine, it just looked flat.

Story was bogus. He didn't spray paint his Steelers helmet. The Raiders staff painted it themselves

Kino or cringe on these football films?

Rudy?
Little Giants?
Remember the Titans?
Varsity Blues?
Any Given Sunday?
The Longest Yard?
Waterboy?
The Replacements?

Trying to pick one out to watch that I haven't seen yet.

>10-6
>lose to toxins
i'll take it

Image?

Attached: IMG_20190815_150326.jpg (1536x2048, 389K)

Thanks turkfren

>Rudy?
Cringe
>Little Giants?
Cringe
>Remember the Titans?
Super cringe
>Varsity Blues?
Cringe
>Any Given Sunday?
Based kino
>The Longest Yard?
Original is kino, remake is cringe
>Waterboy?
Cringe
>The Replacements?
Kino

watch
friday night lights
the program
necessary roughness
north dallas forty
the best of times
big fan

those are better football movies.

you don’t make a wager to get rich quick. if you’re serious about making money betting on the nfl (or sports in general) you gotta take it one step at a time. sure you could cash in big on a longshot futures bet but wouldn’t it be nice to have a little extra something each week coming in instead of hoping the entire nfc collapses and the panthers make it to and win the owl?

Why bother when your pass rush and secondary is elite?

>twinkbackers
Lol no

Was Donald + Suh the greatest DT pair of all time?

Not that I'm doubting that, but why were the Patriots so much more successful on offense then? If it weren't for Gostkowski choking and 1 bad early interception, the Patriots finish that game 23-3 or, being generous and saying Goff doesn't get his bad int either, 23-6.

The Rams didn't even sack Brady once from what I recall, or maybe they did literally one time. Donald was getting pissed off and even roughed Brady at one point out of frustration. If they're so good, why couldn't they pressure or get to Brady? If their secondary is so elite, why couldn't they stop a merely above average receiver like Edelman from tearing holes in it?

>suh
That lazy nig didn't do shit.

no, suh was a useless shitter all last year, he could have had a career year with the amount of attention teams gave donald and he just sat on his ass.

The Pats O-line was much larger than the Rams LB's. Pats knew Donald was dangerous, so they focused on quick throws and RB dump offs to keep the pass rush frustrated.

You can actually blame that SB loss squarely on Suh's shoulder. Patriots doubled Donald the entire night and Suh did fucking nothing to capitalize. He disappeared the whole night.

How do you not even get to Brady once when they spend the entire game doubling one of the other defensive players?

>it was the defense's fault
Yeah all they had to do was shutout the new england patriots they totally blew it

What the fuck is going on in Cleveland?

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Prelude to regular season implosion.

youtube.com/watch?v=iwd8N6K-sLk

No

Fighting in practice is completely normal you low test cuck

Then who was?

Phone + ?

Gee, that only makes Cleveland the...what, 15th team now that has had a preseason fight?

Attached: CamNewtonHavingFun.jpg (1000x600, 192K)

Where are you getting these from?
Also smeth comes back in 2020 for his ring

Amari's injury doesn't scare cow cucks?

God I wish it would happen.

I WILL FIGHT EVERY NIGGER HERE

And youll lose

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Take it easy big ben

my favorite part of preseason games is the neanderthal tier production quality from the local tv stations

>yfw antonio brown and leveon bell get exposed as big ben babies and suck

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>already injured

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>BACK TIGHTNESS

Attached: holy shit.jpg (3490x3124, 644K)

>clay not there to loosen him up anymore
>green gay

Kek haha oh no

For fuck's sake...

Too much buttfucking this guy has.

trip on, old gay

>back tightness

more like blew out his back fucking some twink

>old bay
>giving rapistburger credit for anything
Come on man

We all know hes a bottom, he was servicing a bear

How am I supposed to watch football?
Just my team?
Root for one team (my team) and against three (division)? Am I supposed to watch my division rivals?

your team + redzone

i'm not a fan of any team. i just watch the games that seem to be the best matchup or whatever is available. usually i root for the underdog for each game.

>aaron
>bottom

Has anyone heard from Nick Jonas?

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Watch as much as you want, shit on your division rivals, shitpost your team will be 12+wins repeat

Yeah, the ideal situation every week is your team wins and the other three in your division lose.

If you’re in the NFC you also hope every other NFC team loses to an AFC team (and viceversa if you’re an AFC team), but this will rarely, if ever, happen

I’m trying to make memes and images, but I have a chromebook and it’s impossible

>iggles QBs dropping like flies before the season even begins
lmao

take screenshots, upload it to one of the memegenator sites, and then use it to add text and other overlays

rams

Attached: ram.jpg (468x313, 28K)

He's clearly vers but if he slept with hodell he'd be topping

Go Rams. Pls win the SB this season!

streamable.com/9qqzb

OH NO NO NO NO

not counting on it

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Are superteams cursed in the NFL?

You're either samefagging or a retard. Old gay uses the exact same picture constantly.

archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/filename/youdumbfuck/

How long till the Rams win the Owl?

Rams are not a superteam. More like a retirement team.

Some time around when Christ returns to save us from this hellish joke

When they move back to St Louis

Neat. Looks like I get to see them win before I get raptured.

>6. Jets

Redskins/Bungals thread for those who care.

I'd be surprised if literally anyone watched this.

I saved it cuz it’s a good picture

Yeah, files on Yea Forums don't save with the same names they're posted with retard. Put your fucking trip back on.

I like this Montgomery guy
Someone make a ATL-NYJ thread and I’ll post in it

Nobody does

So are the Jest gonna be a meme offense team this year?

So dak the giant slayer was an oldgay trip. Not surprised.

Fuck, I HATE these new Jets uniforms

Is Miles Sanders a stud? He seems like a stud.

nigga dead

Yeah, makes sense

who

Some Falcons goon

he aight

I also changed the name because the file name was good.
What, do you think i’m the Turkposter too because I posted vargmutt with the same file name?
archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/filename/vargmutt/

Holy fuck that drive got me erect

jets offense looking unstoppable

Same. TD Montgomery

>bert is another cat

NO STOP IT NOOOOOOOOO

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Why does the NFL have kickers

It's even weirder when you realize he's held entire conversations with himself on this board. Some weirdo is out there literally spending his free time talking to himself.

It's FOOTball

It would not surprise me in the slightest.

Jets @ Falcons thread

That's because the ball is shaped like a foot

No one cares about your shitty trip drama, just fuck off.

God damn the falcons suck

AB's feet maybe

good point

>shitskins

no shit, they have a white quarterback

the fuck kinda feet you got man?

Whiter than you Muhammad

Bangles look atrocious

what the FUCK is that noise at the redskins game? fucking voovoozalas?

APOLOGIZE

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why are they playing starters?

Just nutted in my dad wifes daughter. Only real niggas will understand

Why not space out the NFL season so that each team plays every 2 weeks? The NFL season is only like 20 weeks, make it 40, or a conservative 35. That way, there's basically always football; games that were previously on at the same time would be spaced-out to alternating weeks, and players have a longer time to recover from their horrific injuries.

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skins bungholes game is an absolute trainwreck on both sides

>first I put roof in her drink
>then I put 2 in her pink
>this ain’t no regular kink
>she gon throw up in the sink

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wow thats a great idea, too bad its terrible!

NFLPA would never agree to a longer season/shorter offseason

damn quinnen w looking good

But why though. What's the problem?

Too long between games. 1 week is already too hard. You don’t know because all of your sports play games every couple days but 2 weeks between games would be terrible.
It just waters down the season

Why not go back to Réddit?

(You)

Kyler Murrary is a PLAYMAKER and a GAME CHANGER. Simple as that niggas. Shit you cant teach. Literal lock for the ROY and Cardinals will be spooky

So when do the players get vacations?

So many pennies on first drive their starters only got like 4 real snaps

they say this about every god damn rookie QB. remember everyone jerking off RG3 or geno smith?

Daeshon Hall is killing it this offseason.

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who the hell are we even about to field right now, igglesbros?

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Agree. Cardinals are SPOOKY good and an absolutely chad kino level of underrated. I'm finna boutta dab on all these bluepilled haters. Y'alln't going to doubt the Cardinals much longer, but you WILL be seething.

hehe, Snead

Greg Ward, future SBMVP quarterback.

Somehow Clayton Thorson is finally not looking completely like hot garbage.

Those new Jets helmets sure do look shiny

I miss their retro look already, but I like the new ones

Wow darnold looked so good there. What would the jest do without him.

Thinking about getting a Marken Michel jersey...

>Falcons playing their starter
>losing 0-6
>to the Jets backups
Gonna be a yikes from me. Maybe Ryan really is a Julio baby.

Bengals look so bad lads, I think they may be worst in their division. I mean they are playing starters and still cant drive in a point

Why would anyone play their starters in meaningless games? I don’t get it

Is the Jags O-line straight trash, or is the Eagles run defense going to be the best in the league?

some of the starters are out there - quinnen, jamal adams, mosley. The corners and leo are out though

>with the 1st pick in the 2020 NFL Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals select Justin Herbert, QB Oregon

Because they havent played football competitively in over 6 months for most teams, so it's a good idea to try and work out kinks before the games matter. Pretty simple really, you just dont wanna leave em in for too long

The new jets uniforms are infinitely better than their old ones.
Their white, striped green betamale uniform was the garments of a team that was destined to be shit forever. They endured 50 years of being a loser team wearing wh*te helmets and leaf green.
Their new uniforms are a change. No longer will they be the team that you can count on your team beating. The shiny green helmets scream “Yeah fucker, you’re going down,” and the big NEW YORK across the front says “giants WHO? Buffalo WHO?”
The black uniforms represents the giant penises in the pants of every NEW YORK JET. And they’re cumming for you.

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that's gotta be their backup line and they're just ass

>thought games were tomorrow
>missed lamar hurdling someone
FUCK

based

If the Bengals get the first pick, they're probably going with Tua. The sad thing is Dalton is an above average QB, but the rest of the team is just awful. He has no support. The Bengals are about to be the AFC version of the Cardinals. Perpetually stuck in the 2-14 / 3-13 QB drafting cycle since the QB has no support.

>timeout by Oakland
What did they mean by this?

TYBC! Is he elite now?

GREAT PLAY FROM DARNOLD, THE NEXT GREAT.

Even though you're an utter faggot, this is the one time you're right. Their new uniforms are great.

TYBC

>playing az

No.

Aren’t the blacks just alternates though? I don’t want them stepping on >our toes over here, white boy

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They say the Panthers got new uniforms too, but I don’t see any difference desu

Jets had vastly better recievers

...

It’s just the material. Now only Houston is using the older material

The shoulder and leg stripes are no longer shiny.

Matt Ryan sacked twice in a row by Jets secondary
>Matt Ryan sacked four times in one quarter by Jets secondary
Oh, oh no haha

Who here doesn't give a shit if their team sucks cuz its comfy football season, the best time of the year.

I prefer to win, but I’m happy to hangout with dad or my friend—just the one

My dad never cared about football, but my best bro and wife love it, so I can still watch games with them

Try again. Clown world and all

im just happy football is on again, the long time between seasons really helps the hype

so thanks america i guess

Why is his throwing motion so bad....

wheres the ravens v packers thread

So notes from tonight: Lamar Jackson and Hayden Hurst both suck and Ozzie was senile at the end of his tenure

LMAO THE ABSOLUTE STATE OF MATT RYAN

>tfw no qt wide out who can actually catch an easy two yard pass

>Maybe Ryan really is a Julio baby
Was that ever in question?

Since Ozzie was retiring and didn't need to protect his job he drafted Lamar "the nigger" Jackson and traded away Flacco to secure the upcoming Browns dynasty.

Based Ozzie.

HOLY SHIT HASKINS IS ELITE

Whatd I miss? I get super fucking bored and changed it

I was kinda hoping Darnold would come out looking better this year, but he doesn't unfortunately. Maybe he really will bust.

he DRAGON'd.
for real doe, his arm strength is unreal.

>2-13 Vikings

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Good for him. Some fans are so fucking down on him already. I live just outside DC and my buddy will not shut the fuck up about how horrible he is because he is off and on. But the kid started 1 year at Ohio or whatever hes gonna take some adjustment. He wont be worse than daniel jones, alsonmay not be better to be fair

>Schaub playing better than Matt Ryan
Embarrassing.

>They endured 50 years of being a loser team wearing wh*te helmets and leaf green.

Jets had green helmets in the 80's and 90's, zoomer

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>bears first seed losing to the fucking failcunts
tragic

new

Matt Ryan is a fucking joke. Schaub did more than him in 1 minute than he did all half.

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fans and players need a break

I got into football last Friday and am now a giants fan. Tell me how bad I fucked up.

Case Keenum & Nick Foles feel like the same person to me, I always get them confused

are there any players who you always mix up with one another?