/trans/

Lads, why did nobody tell me Modric is shit?

It’s actually scary how much better Tottenham look than us
Also why the fuck is Hazard so fat and wearing number 50

Think Zidane will be first big club manager sacked for sure. This team is so unbalanced.

Should have been Jordan Hendo but Neville Longbottom is a faggot

It’s really pissing me off
Trips confirms score should always be top left

A former Premier League star was punched in the face by knife-wielding robbers who broke into his home at 1am as his family slept, the Standard has been told.

The former Tottenham Hotspur forward was attacked by six masked raiders looking to steal designer watches from the £4 million property he shares with his wife in Cricklewood, north-west London.

A neighbour of the retired international footballer, whom the Standard is not naming, said: “He told me that they were physically abused and threatened with machetes and horrible stuff like that. The raiders were in and out in five minutes ... these people know what they’re doing. The family are fine now, they are a strong family but it wasn’t pleasant.”

>whom the Standard is not naming

but why?

It's probably bollocks

Krancjar?

>HTFC edition 7.0
>7.0
Holy fuck, /trans/ has hit full autism.

>one guy making a thread with the same "edition" 7 threads in a row
>one guy making a thread 40 posts early

So THIS is what black girls are like...

Attached: pepe.jpg (960x842, 80K)

AND I STILL SEE THAT TACKLE BY KANE
AND WHEN HARRY KANE SCORED
KANEY BELTING THE BALL

This isn't even close to peak autism, check out /vr/ or /tg/

Why is Juve selling Kean? Are they retarded? Do they unironically think Higuaín and Icardi are better at this point?

Attached: 1564456841033.png (382x417, 111K)

You do realise the HTFC threads will stop the moment you get the fuck over it and stop giving him attention by chimping out?

They need money for lucucku

I meant in terms of /trans/. Why is this sad cunt making Huddersfield threads anyway? They're a non-league shithouse.

Icardi is a god if you let him cuck you

AND HAZZA DANCIN’

Why does it matter? Not being a dick, but you see the OP once and then scroll down and go back to the same old shitposting you do every day. People overreact about OPs in general

Wasnt Lukaku going to Inter Milan? Oh sheit, they will cuck Inter

Because he is exactly the same player as Lukaku who will be confirmed at Juve this week

lads

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Attached: michael owen xmas.png (640x264, 21K)

Stop feeding him with your anger. Just get over it and it will stop
See

>but you see the OP once
which is why it should be a different OP every thread
not the same mong club

“It’s all too easy for Tottenham to smash through Real’s back door”

What did the commentator mean by this?

Grim

twitter.com/SkySportsNews/status/1156241112555806726?s=19

playing monster hunter

>drop martial
>make Dybala SS
>Bruno to CAM
>Mcsauce to RCM
>Matic/Fred DM
4th place here >we come

Btw, is Arsenal going to do some signs or no?

Jesus. Who would have actually thought united could pull this off at the start of the window. God tier swap

They can be alright.

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#midnightmass #bucksfizz #prezzies #pigsinblankets #imnotfuckingwatchingthequeen #christmaspud #topofthepops

what happened to swap deals not happening eh lads?

Great. Thank you cunts for now guaranteeing 3 more HTFC editions because of your never ending whining.

>Dybala is 26 in November.

Why hasn't he become good yet?

Attached: Dybala.jpg (1200x900, 112K)

youtube.com/watch?v=SpWnjC111yE

yer Ramseys, Rabiots, Lukakus...

imagine wanting a shithouse nobody club as the OP image
grim

>>Dybala is 26 in November.
and 26 goals shy of 30 in may

Because he skipped good and went straight to great.

What's with United and these meme players? Is the social media presence the most important aspect for them before making a signing?

They already deliver on justeat, this seems like the next logic step

>Dybala
>Slabhead
>Fernandes
>Pookaku gone
Are we officially back lads?

Attached: MyMan.png (1920x1080, 1.57M)

Hey siri, call bent user

I literally don’t want it. What about my previous post don’t you understand you fucking mong?

Juventus are getting the better deal by a fucking mile. United are retarded for letting this happen.

>giving companies your info
They listen to you noncing as well.

>Juventus are getting a better deal

>Allowing one of your top assets to leave in order to sign a player who will be on the bench in every important game just so you can cuck Inter

was meant in general not just you specifically you spacker

It’s just autism. The cash involved in transfers and wages now makes swaps much more appealing. You know ahead of time that you can offload a player rather than purchasing and then trying to find a buyer.
And it makes a lot of sense for two misfiring players to swap. Sometimes a change of scenery has a big impact. Worst case both clubs are in the same position of having an unwanted player in a year’s time.

Fuck Off faggot

not yet, Pogba needs to fuck off too

Also Ole is a trash manager

Sell virus Poobag for £180 gorillions and then yes

>the last /trans/ of the year will be a HTFC edition
Fucking /trannies/, they ruined /trans/

>Dybala
>top asset
>literal 3 season flop and bench warmer

Nah. Lukaku has actually been one of the more consistent united players and has a good goal scoring record in general. Dybala has been mediocre for years now it's no wonder they're telling him to fuck off.

Are you retarded or something
Juve doesn't have a single good player on the wings or on the attack except a geriatric ronaldo.

Cucking your rivals is the essence of farmers leagues like Uber Eats, Bundes and Serie A

So lads.
Ashes, who will win?
Rugby World Cup, who will win?

So it's officially a two horse race between City and Spurs, right?

The only reason people think Dybala is good is because of FIFA and Football Manager. If you'd seen him play you'd realise he's kinda' pants.

Bloody hell lad. You might want to check your blood pressure pal. Same goes to anyone else who gives a fuck about that shit

And now they do seeing as they're getting a striker with one of the more consistent records in Europe over the last few seasons. Higuain is finished. This lukaku signing will make their attack a legitimate threat now aside from Ronaldo.

>Lukaku
>consistent
He's fucking shite m8. Can't trap a bag of cement, can't run and disappears when you're playing any team that is remotely good.

Desperate autistic Liverpool fan spotted

Pookaku is trash

>Ashes
>a coverted 'cup' played by the same 2 teams every time
who cares

75 grand won on the chase lads

spurs with no transfers except dembele replacement?

The aussies are englands eternal rivals.
I guess a jock wouldnt understand though since we dont give a fuck about you hehe

lukaku is trash though, no technique whatsoever, shit first touch (wonder how that will work out for Sarri's system), hasn't performed at the top level ever.

He is enough to win the League don't get me wrong, but Juventus can't hope to compete in CL level with fucking Lukaku

I only know him because of his celebration

>Hurr Lukaku can’t control a football
>hurrr Lukaku is very consistent good player

Make up your minds ABUs your seethe is visible from space

This level of delusion must in fact be bait.

Holy mother of god you are retarded. Lukaku will never be good enough to compete at a CL level

Eriksen and Alderweireld staying will be like two new signings

What's wrong with that, lad? You saying the British Home Championship was shit/shouldn't come back during the Olympics in place of Olympic Participation because the 'same four teams' play?

>Lukaku
45 apps: 15 goals 4 assists (12 in EPL)

>Dybala
43 apps: 10 goals 5 assists (5 in juvewinslol league)

Dybala is fucking shit Juve is easily getting the better deal here.

Kek

do you also watch the Oxbridge boat race every year?

Nobody told me Kompany went to Anderlecht to straight up become player-manager.

for PSG

>Newcastle are unlikely to sign Liverpool winger Harry Wilson because he isn’t available on loan. Liverpool would want £20m up front.

I do because I'm from Oxford, so it's nice seeing us win against the filthy Cambridge.

*points*

more like the boat GAYce

plz no

we'll get someone, at least one fullback and a midfielder too

cannot wait for lukaku to have the best season of his career and dybala to struggle and meme his way to 4 league goals

Why don’t Man U just ask for Cristiano Ronaldo in exchange for Lukaku? He’s good at scoring goals

Can't wait to pick up Fifa and fire up my Ronaldo game with Juventus. Been a Cristiano R. fanboy since 2007-2008.

Lukaku will make ten appearances for Juve off the bench. Where the fuck will he even play in Sarriball system kek?

>imagine being so upset about your own life you complain daily about what a OP looks like in a football transfer thread on 4channel

What is wrong with some people?

He'll play the Kante role

Sarri has personally been pushing for lukaku so he obviously has big plans for him within his system. I think lukaku will be really successful in the Italian league and I bet united will regret this transfer. Dybala is not a player suited for the premier league he gets barged off the ball by midgets.

>unable to control a football
>play in midfield
>fat as fuck
>play the Kante role

Good kekkles. Thanks bro

“Sarri has personally been pushing for Lukaku”

No he hasn’t sweetie

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The new BT Sport logo is a bit dull.

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Remember when people thought this was a good deal?

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it was a good deal, man u are just painfully shit

Some people in this thread apparently still do.

They dipped into their "graphic design" fund to buy the rights to wrestling

It seemed like a good deal until October

Lukaku was and still is a good player just look at his overall premier league goal scoring record. United are just garbage and he deserves better.

what does BT stand for

why would a sports network buy the rights to a non-sport?

Attached: 1545994285461.jpg (1366x768, 144K)

christ I forgot that happened

Everton paying £40m for the Pasta Iheanacho

Attached: Jeff.jpg (180x200, 14K)

BIG TITS

just stands for bt these days
once upon a time it stood for british telecom, when all the phone lines were publicly owned

I'm sure some do occasionally.

I can't wait for Manchester United to splash the cash on a big marquee big name signing who will undoubtably flop because he'll barely fit into the squad and is only coming to get the fans hyped.
Then the media will go on about how Manchester United are back and the top 4 need to be nervous about Manchester United and how they could win the title and how good their signings are.
Then the new signings will flop and everyone will be so confused as to why they flopped even though Man United's problems have been evident since Fergie left but everyone wants to ignore it because they're The Great Manchester United, The Greatest Sports Club To Ever Exist. Then the fans and media will become revisionist idiots and act like the big marquee signing they were all sucking off a few months ago was actually a terrible player and Man United need to sign actually good big name marquee players, and the cycle repeats.

>How come footballers don't take cocaine?
Are you taking the piss, lad.

they do
a lot of long-term "injuries" are actually drugs bans that the club are keeping secret

I literally never take a breath that doesn’t include cocaine and I have an amazing life. Haven’t needed to sleep or eat in 4 months.

do you reckon footballers bun zoots

I think they're thinking they're cucking Sky but ratings are dreadful and no one buys their PPVs anymore because of the WWE Network so it's a retarded move.

Ok buddy you enjoy yourself.

Pretty sure Livermore did

what are these random deletions about?

Attached: 1560909567255.jpg (1600x1202, 222K)

>people suddenly rating lukaku now that he's leaving

You excited for Dybala lad you ready for him to solve all United's problems.

>no n'gubu dont go

Grew up in kilburn and cricklewood. Can't imagine a footballer wanting to live there. Guess it's cheap compared to the usual places footballers buy in London

>Sat on Zoopla alone in my shit-hole flat which I can barely pay for in an area I don't like on a 2-year lease looking at what I could have gone for instead.

Lads. Does it ever get better?

Attached: 648.jpg (648x595, 51K)

>NW London
>home invasions

It definitely happened.

>vegan sausage rolls help firms boost profits by 50%
are all the uk vegans going to greggs or what ?

>Does it ever get better?

Attached: 1471091787393.png (720x400, 224K)

its a representation of the Triskele
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triskelion

Its not that people think he's unreal but he's been a good goalscorer for pretty much his whole career aside from last season, even his first season at United was pretty okay.
If he moves to Juve he'll be playing in a MUCH better team that hasn't been a complete shambles since 2012, and he'll be in a worse league. He'll probably put up decent numbers.

yeah, it's the cheapest option for ready made vegan food desu

piers morgan brought the vegan sausage roll loads of traffic

Imagine unironically trading Dybala for Lukaku

Imagine believing that Dybala is good.

what the fuck lad? where are you living?
if you say London then you deserve it tbqh

He's better than Lukaku

Yo, what happened to those Rice to United rumours? I feel like he would be better for the team's stability than Fernandes.

But he literally won’t play

>€170,000,000.

Attached: Hazard.jpg (720x778, 44K)

For me, its Hagen Dazard

I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE FOR REAL THIS TIME, /trans/!

Attached: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE FOR REAL THIS TIME.jpg (225x225, 8K)

He is better than Lukaku tho

Can't do worse than Lukaku. Guy literally has no first touch, can't shield the ball and can't act as a target man to save his life.

>Man Utd cant score against Norwegian fishermen

I don't get it.

Eaten Hamzard

He eats too much Daz washing powder.

The ice cream.

Attached: 999999-55000681827[1].jpg (460x460, 38K)

Haha

Can score against Tottenham and inter Milan. Weird.

Oh no I got that. I just thought 'I don't get it' was a funnier way of saying 'that was shit'.

Because Gomes still hasn't come no. The black midget is a wizard

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>United unironically looks 10x better with Greenwood & Chong in attack

The fuck are they still wasting time trying to get Martial & Lingard to actually contribute

>Steve Bruce has picked two goalkeepers in his starting lineup tonight

Attached: _20190730_193036.jpg (720x694, 75K)

Zidane made a big mistake going back

Who here /tits/?

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Explain to me who doesn't look up this shit, who are the GK's?

>heckingbottom

Darlow and Dubravka are both keepers

Must be a mistake.

For me, it's HIBERNIAN ACADEMY GRADUATE

We could of been discussing Mbappe to Newcastle right now lads, what went wrong?

Ashley once again using the 'pretend we're being taken over to boost our stock price' meme.

The arabs let us down

>could of

>could of

Attached: 1472305167338.png (500x375, 231K)

>could of

Pogba to Galatasaray possible?

Attached: austria slap.png (166x159, 25K)

ask again in 9 years

Attached: 1504535120961.jpg (600x451, 41K)

>Could of

United maintain 100% preseason record. Top 4 guaranteed. And Dybala incoming. United win transfer window

That wasn't funny either though. The ice cream joke was clearly intentionally shot whereas your retort was unironically shit

you mean ManU?

They won't even get into CL. Cursed club

>Injury time goal against part-time Vikings extras

>cursed
Even when irrelevant they still win some of the smaller competitions

Are you the Bong living in Austria?

Attached: Fat Austrian.png (589x634, 236K)

Fernandes is the better player, they should focus on him

But they’re getting both

Poobag is being sold which is why he was missing today. Fernandes and SMS will come in as cover for that. And Dybala swapped for Lukaku. Finally Maguire for £85 on deadline day.

I wish cocaine was cheaper. I really do.

Just snort rat poison. Same shit

Drugs are bad mmmkay

would lose its cool image if the homeless started doing it

They are opting for fat and older version of Moist Kean

Any better games on than Bayern Fenerbahce?

Kek. Love Phil

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This
United should've made a move for ten Hag
Ole has a loser mentality and is fucking trash

yeah, this actually was a typo

dubravka is #12

Attached: EAvb21CXYAAwhiV[1].jpg (1800x1800, 243K)

It's much cheaper in 3rd world countries. Just move to one

Why another Huddersfield thread?

Disappointing. I thought Bruce was treating the pre season with the contempt it deserves.

newest /trans/ gimmick

Because people like you keep whining about it. They will stop when you stop moaning like a little girl

some autist is desperate for people to give a fuck about his club now that paddypower's gimmick was shown to be exactly that

Would look absolutely beautiful if true.

Attached: United 2019-20.png (480x600, 139K)

For me, it's JAV.

Attached: 1547776962206.jpg (1616x1080, 165K)

Who wants a shit muslim CB?
Could be >your teams for only £30,000,000

>he watches porn

He lives in UK. It IS third world. Literally more privacy and rights in any shithole 3rd world nation than here.

This gimmick got stale a long time ago and arse are selling him.

He isn’t gone yet m8

>PSV losing to Albanians and mountain jews

>muh privacy
Get over it

Lavezzi to West Ham is a done deal

Good goy

>fenerbahce

Excessive CCTV doesn't make us third world

sport.bt.com/the-script/the-script-of-the-201920-season-google-opta-and-squawka-predict-premier-league-champions-league-and-europa-league-outcomes-S11364380558801

Final table, lads.

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keep posting and you’ll get the other 1/2

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How much you paying over there. Its somewhat expensive here.

>Palace top half

Trump has the other half

Attached: trump coin.jpg (263x300, 16K)

Dybala is such an overrated and mediocre player.. just seems like a flop waiting to happen. If I owned a team I wouldn’t be willing to pay more than £25m for him

Who will Real Madrid panic buy on the last day?

Origi for 95m

Pretty boring 2bh. Was hoping to see some wild shit like Wolves in 4th and Chelsea in 13th and Watford getting regulated.

Messi

window isn't shut yet

How are Liverpool fans towards neutrals? Lad in work can't use his charity shield ticket so I bought it off him

i'm assuming the charity shield will be 80%+ neutrals

But would you give Lukaku for him? I would

What % of the money from the charity shield goes to charity?

>Poobag is being sold which is why he was missing today

He started as a sub and came on in the second half. Wtf?

Which team is more poorly managed overall, united or real?

0%

That's why they renamed it the Community shield, they lost their charitable status

none; that's why it's not called the charity shield any more

the absolute state of Dutch football

Bailly had OP, out for 5 months

Basically confirms Maguire

lol

Attached: 1546562732377.png (598x489, 381K)

Spuds were playing Madrid though

wasnt that game a week ago?

They played United the game before that.

He's made of glass ffs

Live footage of Ed Woodward negotiating with LFC

youtube.com/watch?v=SySlw-s0Q0w

Why would he negotiate with Liverpool?

>BOSS
>MY KNEES

>PSWEE

then why is it still a friendly?

It's not

City included it in the !quadruple they won last year

>Maximum of six substitutions

on a terry a davis binge again lads

Friendlies have unlimited subs

Because nobody cares about it except small time clubs like Shitty.

That was some delicious spin because they clearly trademarked "Fourmidables" months prior and they had to use it.

>Law 3: The Players

>2. Number of substitutions
>Official competitions

>The number of substitutes, up to a maximum of five, which may be used in any match played in an official competition will be determined by FIFA, the confederation or the national football association except for men's and women's competitions involving the 1st teams of clubs in the top division or senior ‘A’ international teams, where the maximum is three substitutes.

people barely care about the FA Cup let alone this pointless meme game

>have to go all the way to Turkey to play Chelsea

When it ended with two English teams, they should have just relocated the Super Cup final to Cardiff

ITT: Managers that will be exposed in upcoming season
I'll start

Attached: Vamos_man.jpg (768x432, 51K)

That’s still not in England tho

Same people

Jurgen Flopp

Attached: if you could have it all.png (1280x720, 1.1M)

Nout to do with CCTV where 80% of it is privately owned because CCTV ownership massively reduces your insurance cost. It's to do with general privacy, interference from the state and punishment of people to enforce a status quo and any dissent is labelled under a generic heading of 'bad' to get you punished. USA might be shit too but at least they pretend to have human rights like freedom of speech and internet access (yes, that is a human right) and freedom of expression.

Also this fucking guy

Attached: Vamos.jpg (968x681, 50K)

lmao whatever nerd

>USA might be shit too but at least they pretend to have human rights
kek you heard of the Patriot Act?

We all agree this is the most based football podcast, right?

twitter.com/TheTotallyShow/status/1156222330248540166

>implying he wasn't immediately exposed after his month-long honeymoon period

Will be sacked in December.

Nothing to expose. Getting fired by December would be meeting expectations

>that zoomer in the comments thinking it's a rip-off of some other podcast

Hence why I said 'pretend'. BoJo could say tomorrow 'Human rights no longer apply in the UK' and nothing would change.

>no BOSS
I thought you guys were paying him 500k a week, right? Surely at those wages he must be your most important player.

>we can search your property and arrest you without a warrant also we're monitoring you all the time
isnt 'pretending'. The only people claiming America is some bastion of freedom are either ignorant or outright lying

>he was missing today
He played in the 2nd half m8

this does not matter to the ABU

>literally declared 'hate crimes' as a law unconstitutional and against human rights to freedom of speech
>can own firearms
>can draw and make what they want as long as it isn't intended to harm anybody
>can legally defend their home without an incredibly invasive and costly trial which is only possible because David Cameron changed the laws on home invasion and self defence to allow you to kill somebody (but proving you didn't ambush them or lay traps is the issue)
>not at least somewhat better than here
Uh-huh.

Is the nugubu arsenal just bought only a pacey black lad or does he have some skill? Dont trust highlight videos.

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OH SAY CAN YOU SEEEEE

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>Nsoki to Newcastle

Even Big Mike is trying to get on the N'didi meme

Is this a foul lads?

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I mean, she played the ball. So no

No he’s dog shit. Gervinho 2.0

He's better than Iwobi, that's all Arsenal fans should care about.

I'll allow it

haha

>cheating on me

Oh there are multiple of you in here? Are you the Bong Austrian?

Attached: Harder Daddy Austria.png (332x159, 18K)

DYBALA IS COMIN HOME

In real life it'd be violent conduct and she'd be sent off
In a VAR dreamworld the player on the ground would be sent off for obstruction and the goal would stand

Why? Ball is free, it isn't in her hands, she's entitled to go for the ball and she hit the ball, not the player.

The ref wouldn't have a good view of it and it'd be the hazard ballboygate all over again especially since the girl seems to be KO'd in the final panel

Should I be worried about his legs?

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He's never had a injury recorded in his stats online.

Attached: Nog Leg.jpg (700x600, 77K)

>i haven't even played a game
>let's just put my hand on the badge like it means something

It's almost like it's a photo shoot

He looks confused.

Christ do you even know what photoshoots are? Rhetorical question, I know /trans/ has been invaded by retard post-WC redditors.

Thought he was signing for Liverpool LOL.

Sky reporting United and Juve have now agreed a deal for Dybala-Lukaku swap

It’s happening. Who would have fucking thought eh

Argies always flop at United.

Did Heinze flop?

The lad who threatened to join Liverpool?

Why hasn't anyone signed him? Surely he could do a job in the lower end of the table

Attached: welz.jpg (2048x1152, 148K)

Heinze and Tevez where good

Same goes for Sturridge.

Attached: exploding knees.png (288x600, 229K)

Yes him. Did he flop?

>Chelsea's main strikers are Giroud and Abraham
Let that sink in

>abraham
>bad

No, I'm the Austrian that's been here for years. I haven't posted much in /trans/ lately though :/

You now remember the meme about Giroud being the best striker in the world.

Yeah I know, but some Austrian said he was an ex-pat a few days ago, thought it might have been you. That's all. You're my fren Austrian :)

Same reason players in FM don't get signed. Think they're too good for lower teams that can afford them, teams they think are good enough for them don't want to pay that kind of wage and those that cover both don't need him.

>Malcom close to a move to russia

lel, this fucking guy

>Manchester United are interested in signing Barcelona and France centre-back Samuel Umtiti, 25. (Le10 Sport - in French)

Paris St-Germain have vetoed Barcelona's move for 27-year-old Brazil forward Neymar. (Marca)

>Arsenal are closing in on a deal for Celtic and Scotland left-back Kieran Tierney, 22. (Mail)

Inter Milan and Argentina striker Mauro Icardi, 26, could be heading to Napoli in an 80m euros (£73m) deal. (Corriere dello Sport - in Italian)

>Crystal Palace have made a bid of about £14m for CSKA Moscow and Russia's 21-year-old striker Fedor Chalov. (Sky Sports)

Bayern Munich chief executive Karl-Heinz Rummenigge says he did not understand why manager Niko Kovac said the club were confident of signing Manchester City's 23-year-old Germany winger Leroy Sane. (Bild - in German)

>Real Madrid coach Zinedine Zidane says he does not know if 28-year-old Colombia attacking midfielder James Rodriguez will be at the club next season. (Marca)

West Brom have received no offers from Aston Villa for Scotland winger Matt Phillips, 28. (Birmingham Mail)

Attached: mordred 64.png (900x1150, 1.18M)

>Newcastle and England Under-21 goalkeeper Freddie Woodman, 22, is a target for Celtic and Arsenal, plus two unnamed Championship clubs. (Chronicle)

Newcastle have had a £4.5m bid for Amiens and Sweden's 24-year-old right-back Emil Krafth rejected. (Sun)

>Partizan's Serbia centre-back Strahinja Pavlovic, 18, is "flattered" by rumours linking him with a move to Celtic. (Daily Record)

Former Chelsea and Manchester United boss Jose Mourinho will return to management when the right opportunity arises. (Sky Sports)

>Former Manchester United striker Teddy Sheringham says manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer should sell 26-year-old France midfielder Paul Pogba. (Talksport)

Atletico Madrid midfielder Koke says he believes 19-year-old Portugal striker Joao Felix will become "one of the best players in the world". (ESPN)

>Preston North End have knocked back a loan bid from Wigan Athletic for 26-year-old Jamaica-born midfielder Daniel Johnson. (Lancashire Evening Post)

Attached: mordred 65.jpg (825x1275, 443K)

>Spurs
>Pooch

Attached: Levy Power.jpg (976x1243, 224K)

Who's the biggest loser of this transfer window right now? For me it's Zaha.

Liverpoop

Apparently Carlos Vela is joining Spurs.

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Liverpool
Have a great season last year. Get close to their ultimate aim of winning the premier league
Don’t sign anyone and allow city to improve again unchallenged

No? Vela is trending because he and Ibra have been bitching at each other and they got told to play it down before All-Star match.

That's not what I read when I clicked on it, they were talking about Spurs signing him for 12m.

Based

twitter.com/Closey69/status/1156256514388176897
literally how

Iwobi is dog shit and a eye sore to watch, but 5heads ass was just as frustrating to watch. In other words arsenal got memed for a nugubu.

Who wants to buy a player on the decline they know they'll never be able to sell? Most wogs peak at the age of 25 and then get progressively shittier from there onwards.

Weird. I went on twitter, clicked on a link of a funny video, somehow ended up in a twitter about LGBT brainwashing in UK schools and al the various conflicts involving. What the fuck. Is twitter all like this? I don't use this shit.

Except he is better, so who cares? How about wait a season before deciding if he's shit or not. Autism places have worked out it takes a long time for players to settle.

This

Pretty hyped for the community shield now lads

Lads a girl just asked me to be her dom. I'm meeting her at the weekend. She wants me to instruct her on what to wear and when she can use the toilet.
Way out of my depth here.

>City sign Rodri
>When they need another FW to replace ageing Aguero
>Think they'll beat us to the title this year
LMAO. You'll never be able to shitpost again when we win it at a canter.

>Get to final of CL
>Lose due to cheating
>Get to final of CL next year
>Win

>Get to 2nd with record points
>Don't win due to cheating/bias
>???
So, there you go. We've learnt from mistakes and have VAR to make sure City don't win and the only way they will is if it's paid off by the Arabs.

why did you accept it ffs

because its hot and I can get my end away whenever I want

I'd have her sign a contract and have a witness see this. Dom shit leads to rape accusations if shit goes south. If you don't care, if she's tied up, fuck her arse (use a lot of lube, pour it on her and finger he arse with it so it's lubed up) if she's like 'no' tell her she doesn't get to talk etc etc. Then go to town. She'll either lose herself in the RP or she'll freak out and scream in which case back out, apologise and say this is why you didn't wanna do it because there's no established boundary. Or set up a safe word. I dunno.

Whatever, I don't believe it, pics/video or gtfo. I'd be concerned this is a trap so she can accuse you of rape but eh.

There are so many problems with this post it must be bait

>state facts
>b-b-bait

Have a conversation about consent first, establish a safe word and some boundaries. When you get down to it, just be super assertive. There are plenty of different things you can do, especially if she likes being hurt etc, just be imaginative. By the sounds of it she'll just be happy to do whatever turns you on. Good luck mate.

Fuck me, safe word definitely.
Shit, I was more worried about not knowing what the fuck I'm doing but now I've got a new level of anxiety about it.

No pics or video yet but not sure if i'd post it on here so rules are gtfo i guess.

She's done it before with some guy that knew what he was doing but lived quite far away. She's into pain, humiliation and watersports (makes this convo on topic for Yea Forums)

>accuse city of cheating/bias when liverpool benefitted from it

Yeah you can't post shit online without their consent. Under revenge porn shit. So I was merely memeing (unless she's into this kind of idea of others seeing her, which sounds like she must be). If you're not comfortable, back out, or do really minor shit and say you gotta ease into this.

Don't know if she'd want that or not. Comes under humiliation I guess but kind of a different matter altogether.
We've talked a lot about trust and after care so don't think we'll be going in the deep end on sunday, so to speak.

Yeah don't listen to the other user too much, girls don't put themselves on the line like that with an ulterior motive. She's just a freak looking to get off. The key is communication, things like stress positions are fine any time but don't be going for anal or choking unless she's stated before that she likes that. Also learn how to choke properly if she is into that, you don't want to go near the windpipe. Have confidence, be assertive, communicate. You'll be fine.

Yeah, all weird. I wouldn't rush into this if you're serious with the girl. Do it over a few months. Learn what she likes and dislikes, what you like and dislike, find a common list of shit and work on it. If you have a specific desire she doesn't really want to do and vice a versa, do a trade. For example, she might want you to RP as father/daughter with her and you might find that creepy, but you want to fuck her arse and she doesn't want to. Kind of thing.

This could simply be a test mate, so I dunno. It's difficult for virgins like me to even come to terms with the idea somebody being intimate at all so, I'm probably not the best person to listen to.

Nah mate there is a lot of horror stories out there, my point was don't jump into it because rushing into it can lead to issues. Relationships are complicated and people who feel hurt do stupid things (like report fake rapes) and then don't back out when they've calmed down because they fear getting in trouble. I'm just giving advice but as I said, probably not the best. Trying to help an user out and getting different perspectives will help.

>Everyone in world of football says city’s only weakness is no cover for Fernandinho
Sign literally perfect replacement

>get to CL final and lose due to cheating
No due to shit goalkeeper
Finish 4th

>Get record points total
Still lose

>learn how to choke properly
Good point, need to google that. That's exactly the kind of minefield I'm worried about.

advice is much appreciated mate

And so did City. City got it more because there was a desire for a possible quadruple.

>Ramos busting Salah's shoulder so he has to go off isn't cheating
Uh-huh. It was specifically targetted. This isn't arguable. Watch the replay. He purposefully did it to make Salah land the way he did. As for City FW's, Sterling and Jesus? Really? Aguero might be OK but he needs better cover. I dunno why somebody like Moise Keane wasn't signed. Won't be too expensive, is young enough and good enough to come on and rotate against the weaker teams.

So is he actually The Klopp or just LARPing as him?

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could be either

They have first refusal if a bid comes in for Kean in the future, so they'll just buy him back if he's any good.

doesn't mean everton have to accept the bid

They want a buy-back clause. Kean going to Everton would essentially be a loan by any other word unless he plays like shit.

he’s a false false 9

>Newcastle and England Under-21 goalkeeper Freddie Woodman
Why? Arsenal have half a dozen GK's they could use. They've managed to keep most of their budget, sign fucking Tierney (even though he is shit) and try and grab another defender.

I’m excited to see Rodri take over Fernandinhos position, big shoes to fill

hes supposed to take over from biscuits for spain too
then again javi martinez was supposed to do that

heard javi martinez is changing nationality to merseyside

Still a good deal as long as the buy back is high

give me her digits mate, I'll sort her for you

not really, think about it
>Everton buy him for £30m
>Pay him £5m or so a year
>in two years, Juventus activate his £45m buyback clause
>Everton make £5m
Even worse is he scores 20+ goals in his debut season and activated at the end, Sure they get £10m but is £10m worth the 20 goals?

Current List of Bankrupted Teams
Bolton Wanderers FC (England) - Relegated to League One (Third Tier), 12 points subtracted for this season
U.S. Palermo (Italy) - Club dissolved, Re-founded as ) S.S.D. Palermo, all players released, starting in Serie D
Foggia Calcio (Italy) - Same fate as Palermo

It's just a Tierney of time, lads

20 goals could get them CL/EL then they could get a replacement just as good

yeah but you took a punt on a young lad who turned out good, you don't wanna risk spending a lot and getting a flop.

one hand washes the other, both wash the face

Why would he go to Everton?

Just bail. Meme fetishes are for shitty broken people who hate their parents. Nobody who would be into that stuff is someone you need in your life.

3 way swap deal:
lukaku to inter
icardi to juve
dybala to united
there, solved

Manchester United are interested in signing Barcelona and France centre-back Samuel Umtiti, 25. (Le10 Sport - in French)

>Paris St-Germain have vetoed Barcelona's move for 27-year-old Brazil forward Neymar. (Marca)

Arsenal are closing in on a deal for Celtic and Scotland left-back Kieran Tierney, 22. (Mail)

>Inter Milan and Argentina striker Mauro Icardi, 26, could be heading to Napoli in an 80m euros (£73m) deal. (Corriere dello Sport - in Italian)

Crystal Palace have made a bid of about £14m for CSKA Moscow and Russia's 21-year-old striker Fedor Chalov. (Sky Sports)

>Bayern Munich chief executive Karl-Heinz Rummenigge says he did not understand why manager Niko Kovac said the club were confident of signing Manchester City's 23-year-old Germany winger Leroy Sane. (Bild - in German)

Real Madrid coach Zinedine Zidane says he does not know if 28-year-old Colombia attacking midfielder James Rodriguez will be at the club next season. (Marca)

>West Brom have received no offers from Aston Villa for Scotland winger Matt Phillips, 28. (Birmingham Mail)

Newcastle and England Under-21 goalkeeper Freddie Woodman, 22, is a target for Celtic and Arsenal, plus two unnamed Championship clubs. (Chronicle)

>Newcastle have had a £4.5m bid for Amiens and Sweden's 24-year-old right-back Emil Krafth rejected. (Sun)

Partizan's Serbia centre-back Strahinja Pavlovic, 18, is "flattered" by rumours linking him with a move to Celtic. (Daily Record)

>Former Chelsea and Manchester United boss Jose Mourinho will return to management when the right opportunity arises. (Sky Sports)

Former Manchester United striker Teddy Sheringham says manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer should sell 26-year-old France midfielder Paul Pogba. (Talksport)

>Atletico Madrid midfielder Koke says he believes 19-year-old Portugal striker Joao Felix will become "one of the best players in the world". (ESPN)

Preston North End have knocked back a loan bid from Wigan Athletic for 26-year-old Jamaica-born midfielder Daniel Johnson. (Lancashire Evening Post)

>Former Manchester United striker Teddy Sheringham says manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer should sell 26-year-old France midfielder Paul Pogba. (Talksport)
>Former Manchester United striker Teddy Sheringham

More like for Miss World contestant shagger

Morning lads. Here's to another day of pressing F5 and being depressed.

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>United are about to sign Maguire, Fernandes and Dybala while getting rid of Lukaku
b-but they dont have CL reeeeee!!!!

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you need to get with the time lad, i've not pressed f5 in like 7 years

>Maguire
poor man's lovren
>Fernandes
poor man's lallana
>Dybala
literally not as good as lukaku

>convincing the world lukaku is worth 90m
how do they do it

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United are not getting Maguire

Belgium tax
Manure tax
Muh shirt sales tax

>Belgium tax
you mean "Belgium - no VISA issues" tax

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>United fans falling for the Dybala being good meme.

Get ready to be disappointed.

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>its a player linked to man utd so he is now shit meme
lol

man u is where formally alright players go to die

its also a club that finished 6th and has people still incredibly seething

you appear to have mistaken laughter with anger

its been so non-stop, Id suggest the same to yourself

Liverpool buying another kid.
Deeply concerning.

>Bailly, Jones, Sánchez, Mata, Lukaku, Smalling, Grant, Lingard, Pereira, Rojo, Fred, Young, Matić and Darmian STILL playing for Manchester United.

Man. They did really well getting rid of that deadwood, eh?

>why don't United just have Lindelof and Tuenzabe as centrebacks and that's it
being ABU is mental illness

Klopp confirmed for nonce

Wish I could turn back time to the good old days.

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based

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youtube.com/watch?v=0ifjCR9SL0s
>SAF
>Phelan
>Meulensteen
With I could turn back time

based ultrarich people

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The absolutely disgusting state of Liverpool fans in the year 2019. You should be butchered an fed to animals

abls advocating murder now
absolutely terrified

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>“I grew in Les Ulis, a suburb of Paris, with my 24 siblings. When I was 10, my parents divorced and my father took everything. I had to take to the streets. I stole food, clothes, videogames. I’d sit outside stores asking for money.”

TIL Evra has 24 siblings.

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I wonder if the rest of them are as big a cunts as he is

Hope he takes care of them all since he was the one who 'made it'

Dybala would be fantastic if Ole can find a system that suits him. A 4-4-2 diamond would be great IMO since united don't really have any good wingers.
Lukaku is overrated trash, don't know what Juve are thinking.

dybala is garbage he's been a consistent flop for club and country and carried 99% of the time meanwhile lukaku has shown his ability when he played for shit teams like west brom and he carried them with his goals. juve are getting the better deal by far. even in lukakus "shit" last season in the prem he still scored 5 more goals and had 1 less assist than dybala who had like 1 less appearance and plays in juvewinslol league.

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>pookaku
>direbala

Who's getting the better of this supposed deal, Juve getting Lukaku or United getting Dybala?

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I'm not sure. Trying to decide which side to pick for shitposting purposes

A few relatively reliable Villa sources saying they're negotiating yet another record fee for a striker from a major club. Who's unsettled somewhere big?

>I stole
>videogames
yeah, I'm sure that was really necessary
he's just another criminal piece of shit trying to justify his crimes

Dybala was bad last year because Juve was structured around Ronaldo. Before that he was among the best in the world.

I'd say both will be better off than without the deal. Juve has no place for Dybala with Ronaldo in the team. And Ole has no use for Lukaku in his system.

Objectively, Dybala is the superior footballer though

harry wilson from liverpool

>Burnley 6-1 Nice
>AFC Wimbledon 2-2 Crystal Palace
>Kristiansund 0-1 Man Utd
>Hibernian 1-3 Newcastle
>Norwich 1-4 Atalanta
>Matlock Town 0-3 Sheffield United
>Real Madrid 0-1 Spurs

cannot wait for burnley fuck off back to championship
is this the year?

Dybala got 22 goals last season playing consistently as a striker. This season he was moved around between being a 10, a second striker to Ronaldo and a right winger. He's just a better all round player than Lukaku with a higher ceiling.

Might be tough with relatively weak teams (other than Villa) coming up and Newcastle, Brighton etc being shit.

They're going to be this year's fulham aren't they

scorching take there

>higher ceiling.
>le 26 year old prospect

lukaku can also play as a winger he's done in before when rashford goes central and he plays off the right and he's got a lot of pace and strength. he was such a good player before united bought him. he will be immense at juve i think.

christ alive /tv is fucking appalling
like properly shite banter
no respect for you if you actively post there

still better than sp because there's no flags

>dab
>allah
Always destined for Man Utd. It was in his name

yup it's the worst board on this site

Probably not, Fulham is more the exception to the rule, likely because they spunked all their money on randoms at the very end of the window. Statistically, the teams that spend the most are more likely to stay up.

Villa have largely bought players who were already there on loan and played a major part in their promotion push and/or had worked with the manager previously and/or are replacements for those who left and were brought in early enough to have a meaningful pre-season with the squad. I imagine they'll be fine (especially given how many absolutely shit sides are in the league this year), but they definitely need another good attacker and a clear 1st choice keeper.

>lukaku is now good
The mental gymnastics of anyone who despise united is hilarious

>lukaku isn't good
the absolute seeth of united fans after realising they're getting a shit deal

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Fulham's transfers were decided by a wrestling promoter who wanks dogs.

>muh stats
Again. The mental gymnastics of you weirdos is hilarious. Keep it up

>stats don't matter only instagram reputation and brand does
The mental gymnastics of you weirdos is hilarious. Keep it up

This is obviously bait
>Aguero is ok
>Sterling

>y-you too
LMAO

Just press update lad

no response. cope.

Think you mean Piemonte Calcio mate

Kek try harder sweetie

>United fans in my group chat absolutely seething Lukaku is being swapped for fucking Dyabala

The butthurt is fucking unreal holy shit

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Do you want me to arrange an appointment with a councillor for you to talk through your problems? I’m guessing your Daddy abused you?

>Being mad at Evra

Racist virgin detected.

>come 6th
>still get people upset

How long until Norwegian Gollum gets sacked?

>calling someone who is objectively a cunt a cunt is racist
don't ever call me racist again
also have sex

oh look it’s a we sell one of our best players when it’s too late to replace them episode again

>lukaku is definitely worth 90m and it is a bad deal that united are losing him
This delusion is quite insane

A truly bizarre set of affairs.

I’m not really sure what Juve gets out of the deal tbqh
Lukaku does not fit into sarriball formation. I guess he’s back up for Ronaldo. But the main reason they’ve signed him is to cuck Inter. Dybala had a pretty bad year last year but is objectively a great footballer. I wonder if he can get back to his best at united

arsenal are having the best transfer window right now. imagine that. everyone who has money isn't even buying better players than a club who literally cannot afford more than a can of carling and a packet of walkers salt and vinegar.

This transfer window closed before first match meme needs to stop I agree

>immense at Juve

Are you referring to his weight because he will be on the bench 99% of the time

Tell me about their defence

if he can't play his best in a pussy league where it's literally free statpadding then he won't play well in the premier league. look at pogba as an example and he's way more talented than dybala.

>Errrr n-no u!!!!
Go back to RAWK

Post the chat. I am a united fan and none of my united mates is remotely sad to see Lukaku go

>being unable to handle banter of any sort

Btw I am literally having sex with a beautiful woman whilst posting this response

>Sam Allardyce is set to be confirmed for the new series of Strictly Come Dancing

United fans have been happy to sell him and not even replace him

But he can play well in a pussy league and has done.
>muh stats
He isn’t an out and out striker like Lukaku.

jesus christ

Does he have a wife?
He will leave her for his dance partner

End bong televsion right now.

I don't think I've seen a weaker United team fucking hell. They sold their only decent striker. Rashford is fucking shit and Martial is dead for whatever reason. Imagine swapping your best striker for the Argentinan Lingard.

Lukaku is a good striker in every possible form except reality
Saying otherwise is showing how little football you watch

working on it according to sky sports.

still sad /lig/ has finished

just one of the lads there

Stop lying on a Tibetan wind instrument enthusiast website

They literally all hate you there and post about how much better the threads are when you aren’t in them

2 series of that complete shite a year now so you don't have long to wait, also there's /imaceleb/ in a few months :]

>2018/19
Have terrible defence which costs them a huge number of points
>2019/20
Same

Genuinely incredible how one guy manages to be hated by every single British part of this site.

lukaku was one of the highest rated strikers in the prem till he joined united. the whole reason united paid the 70 odd million for him was because of that reputation in front of goal he built up. the whole united team was trash last season for many reasons and putting the blame on lukaku is retarded because he's proven himself to be a good player in many teams before united and on the international stage with nearly 50 goals in 80 appearances. united are shit, not lukaku.

nah only a couple of ppl hate me in there like you’re doing now.

yh I have a trip, so what?

Imaceleb ain’t anywhere near as good as lig in terms of Yea Forums, anyways it’s really annoying how it clashes with the apprentice

>one of the lads

You’re literally a joke to them. They bully you mercilessly

>only a couple of people hate me in there

There’s literally only a handful of posters and they all hate you

nice projection there pal

got bullied in school today?

you clearly don’t post in lig if that’s what you think

United are shit and so is Lukaku
FTFY

I guess if you can’t see it then more power to you. But I’m telling you we all hate you here

He can't control a football or score against anyone better than West Ham and to top it off he's an overweight mess who literally cannot run 100m without blowing out of his arse.
He is shit, deal with it.

Lads pogba is going Madrid

Is it now time to say he’s good?

like I care what some mug in a dead general thinks

Who is this?

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>this cope

you sound like a butthurt united fan. anyone with half a braincell knows how good lukaku was and how shit united are and coincidentally he became "shit" when united as a whole were shit.

Buttner
A signing to keep RVP happy

Dry your eyes pal

You seem to keep replying though. Must anger you a bit.

Speaking of dead, /lig/ averaged 40 IPs a thread and only managed 2 editions for the finale. Pretty fucking pathetic.

Is this /brit/ nao? Fookin' 'eel.

What is Klopp’s plan to defeat City in the league this year? How has he improved the ranks?

>Lukaku is good
This is the freshest meme right now

The second edition was only half-full as well

He’s only become good once united we’re getting dybala instead
No one was arguing he was good while he was on his way to inter.

More diving

literally no one has ever said he's not good. united are just shit and i'm glad he's getting his big break. he was really good at everton.

Lukaku

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>literally no one has ever said he's not good
Had your head in the sand the last 8 months or so?

>McBurnie to Blades £20m deal agreed
ayy lmao

that lfc defence though

Haha

>literally no one has ever said he's not good
'Literally' people have and do say Lukaku is shite.
Besides this this is a terrible blanket statement to say about anything or anyone in this sport, you'll always get the sorts of people saying Messi is shite, Ronaldo is shite, Zidane was overrated shite.

To page 10?

>Liverpool have approached Real Madrid in regards for they 16-year old starlet Israel Salazar.
Finely, the big name signing >we wanted, always rated Salazar.

i'm talking about people with some authority i.e. pundits, pro footballers and shit. not internet retards.

Pele was shite he was worse than Jason Lee

New thread:

*scores 30 a season against Huddersfield and Norwich*

lukaku has a better goal/game ratio than theirry henry did at this same stage in their career.

>Salah

Yes to page 10!!!
Ignore for now

Nah lad. Let’s take this to 10 like we should.

not yet welsh mongo is lurking there

Welp, you really stuck to your word

I do like eating cocks.

Don't mind taking one or two up my bum either to be quite honest with you lads.