*ULLE edition*
/bundes/
dänemark
>Nun ist es offiziell: Die SpVgg Unterhaching wird als zweiter Fußballklub in Deutschland den Gang an die Börse wagen. Dies teilte der Drittligist am Mittwoch mit. Der Schritt soll noch im Sommer 2019 erfolgen.
based
how retarded is the dembele idea? i find it utterly retarded but my footy friends irl think it’s totally a great idea.
what do you think?
Barca wants to keep him, coutinho is the one for sale
during the dembele bvb upset didnt wurstl say something like this wouldnt happen at buyern? dembele wasnt very disciplined at barca either so I dont get why they would actually consider signing him
meine Pizza Hawaii ist verbrannt
me neither, but apparently they are desperate and convinced that they could tame that mentally retard somehow. i don’t see dembele changing from a ps4 playing mental baby to an adult any time soon.
>barca cant tame him but we can #miasanmia
classic bauern delusion desu
>Marketing-Einnahmen: BVB knackt 100-Mio.-Marke!
>Der Trikot-Verkauf stieg im Vergleich zur Sommerpause 2018 um 50 Prozent, statt 40.000 Shirts verkaufen die Westfalen aktuell 60.000 Stück im Monat. Tendenz steigend nach der Hummels-Verpflichtung.
>Die Zahl der Fan-Klubs ist weltweit auf 872 gestiegen. Selbst in den USA wurden 15 neue gegründet.
KAUFEN
already did
>ulle posting was over one year ago
time flies desu
>Embolo to Gladbach
hmmmmm......
>Ballack will probably be part of the coaching staff of Lampard at Chelsea
based, first the CFC and after that the CFC
Its never going to happen. Its just Höneß ordering his contacts at the Bild to drop big names to distract from the fact that Sané told them "fuck off" and Pepe is too expensive now (90 million). Theyre gonna end up buying Carrasco.
The truth is that Dembele is at his dream club and earns well enough for him not to get tempted by the 13 Bayern could offer. Not to mention that hes Barca's future and they wont sell.
To this day I dont understand why Bayern didnt get Brandt.
>Sachsen Michi in charge of understanding football on a deeper level than just "fight and win"
chelsea are gonna crash hard next season
Because Brandt isnt a winger and didnt play a full good season yet, he also lacks the miasanmia mentality
>Because Brandt isnt a winger
And yet he played at the winger positions quite well (scorer-wise). He probably will play both winger and 10 for Dortmund, sicne they keep switching positions anyways.
>he also lacks the miasanmia mentality
He pays his taxes?
Stop seething Philipp, you got the captain armband in the end.
brandt is an inside winger but his retarded former coach made him play as a line hugging winger. anyway.
what exactly is the miasanmia mentality?
what effect will the kroos documentary have on bayern being able to score young talent? diminished chances?
they still have by far the most money in germany. so I would say no
next to none
The sports media will completey shit on Kroos, courtesy of Uli's contacts.
>Kroos doesnt like Bay-
youtube.com
>R:Hansa Rostock oder Bayern München?
>K: Bayern München
of course you retard, rostock is shit
>schalke oder dortmund
>eher dortmund
based
>scheisse oder scheisse mit streuseln?
>see kroos likes scheisse mit streuseln!!!!
>hating on Rostock
plebs
Dunno but bayern fans are seething pretty hard judging by their reactions.
Bayern should just buy some cheap Germans like Havertz. Then when we crash out of the CL we can use the excuse that we are sacrificing European results in order to strengthen the man shaft.
This. I actually quite liked it. That being said, alot of commie apartments. Had a weird experience aswell. Went to the club at 2 am to meet some friends and while walking at the edge of the part I see a woman sprinting full speed towards me. Clings to my arm and says "pretend that youre my bf", suddenly a "Asian" male bursts out of the park and keeps stalking us 10 meters behind us. Walked her home. She was quite cute actually.
*edge of the park
redpill me on TSV geyer
fuck off with your boring blog posts. if this is a story you find erzählenswert, then jesus, what 1 langweiliges l1fe
pls have sex
sure buddy, fuck off back to /deutsch/ with your made up stories.
arschverletzt incels mad at the ösi chad
Brandt can't provide width, you mean? Mouth breather.
not as FSV Gense or FC Änte
>ösi chad
have sex, /deutsch/jungfrau
*as good
he got on my shitlist the moment he refused to take the pen even when Müller literally was on the ground begging for him to take it
Just because Bayern is collapsing is no reason to get all salty.
bohoooo bayern baby mad!!!
basirt
Get a trip so I can filter you
You know that there aren’t just one kind of wingers in football, right?
Why yous Germans always gotta be talkin bout shit n shit? Shieeet
>implying you would scare off anyone
FAKE NEWS
>Kroos was 22(?)
>"i dont wanna take a pen, I might miss"
>Schweinsteiger being the opposite of a leader
>Schweinsteiger literally covering his face when Robben misses and gets pushed up and yelled at by Neuer to get his weak ass shit together
>"FUCK KROOS, HE SHOULD BE A REAL LEADER LIKE BASTIAN"
How many CLs did Kroos win again?
fuck off
>thinking a player is defined by position rather than ability
Brandt lacks pace and isn't trickreich genug to play on the wing at a top club, which is why he went to Dortmund. You can joke about le pacy black all you want, but there's a reason they're usually the best on that position.
They call that projecting.
this
Based
>Brandt lacks pace and isn't trickreich genug
Youve never seen him play, have you? Its funny how when a German players goes to Bayern hes a worldclass player. When he goes to Dortmund, hes garbage.
Schweinsteiger was never good at pens but he still manned up and took them
i can understand why they didn't want to shove a mentally weak baby even more money in his ass
thats because Dortmund is a garbage club with garbage fans
what is your favourite club, oh based ösi chad?
>1.7 dribbles per 90
LOL
He's good creatively, in a central position, but lacks defensive ability. Perfect for a club like Dortmund, not suited for anything beyond that.
dont be butthurt at me, it was only the BVB Sojascum posting here so far
why not answer my question? it’s simple and völlig wertfrei
like Yarmolenko?
Sonnenhof Großaspach
>3. liga
>i can understand why they didn't want to shove a mentally weak baby even more money in his ass
Yeah that really paid off considering he went off to win 3 back to back CL titles as a key player.
>He's good creatively, in a central position, but lacks defensive ability.
Youve never seen him play.
>Perfect for a club like Dortmund, not suited for anything beyond that.
I guess well see how the top 3 assists creator of season 2018/19 will perform alongside Sancho, Reus, Alcacer, Hazard and Götze.
wide playmakers that play at top clubs:
salah
coutinho
bernardo silva
Yarmolenko is German? Didnt know that.
still better than scummy BVB with its nigger players and nigger fans
only subhumans support that club, lets hope they lose their next derby again so this scum fucks off from here at least for a little while
>RB Leipzig doesnt have fa-
>look mom I used the n-word
>key player
>Didn't keep pretending to be her bf after getting to her home
beta & gaypilled
1. retarded gloryhunters
2. retarded soja gloryhunters who get denied their glory on a regular basis and are butthurt beyond believe about that
3-18. actual fans
good list
>this kills the sojcuck
Gladbach was cucked by Brighton lmao
Imagine being a player and decide to join a relegation team rather than a good team with great history, European football and better season prospects for a paycheck
only Ronaldo played more CL matches than Kroos
I want Adolf to leave
Dont bother. Bayern's media dominance has made sure that Kroos is seen as a mediocre "mitläufer" and shit player. Anyone who actually has seen him play can tell hes a legend already and the most successful German footballer of all time.
BVB is shit, deal with it
t. seething bauer pretending to be drittligafan
...
who hurt you, bayernbaby?
...
ösi virgin ausgelöst lmao
you will have to deal with BVB being shit.
They were 9 points ahead and verkackt it
They could have still turned it around but verkackt it again against Schalke
its one big verkacking club
Do you think Dembele remembers?
lmaoing at the ösi cuck, never had sex
pls have it
but I did have, and even if hadn't, like you, it wouldnt make BVB any less shit
nah m8, you haven’t had it
pls just have sex
>the germans are fighting each other again.
get a room, a new room
Any info in the English press about Sané's contract extension Nigel?
ösis aren’t germans
also brits have their own league pls stay there
sick and tired of this shit tßqh
>have sex
>bvb still shit
>go into new room
>bvb shit in there aswell
what now?
no they are obsessed about two posh twats and the womens "world cup"
stfu new kid
how about having sex?
sticking our dicks into holes wont solve our problems i fear
What was your favorite game last season? Mine was pic related. So much hope, so much optimism - all gone in a single half
mental illness
/thread
At least he stopped pretending that he isn't a Bauern zoomer
just took a nap
any granaten meldungen from uli?
i hope bayern buys the nigger
yes, he just gave out this chart, visualizing seems like he doesn't just have a grasp on every single editorial office in Germany but also keeps an eye on /bundes/
>Kroos: "Bayern have been working for years on winning the Champions League again. Is it a realistic target? No doubt. They were the better team against us in the semis 2018 but got eliminated. This shows that Bayern with no doubt could get there again"
>Kroos: "Whether that was one of the reasons Pep left Munich, he has to answer that. But I can confirm that he didn't like that I was sold"
>Kroos on Hoeneß admitting selling him was a mistake: "I don't need that. For me it was clear back then that Bayern made a mistake by selling me. I knew that I was important to the team and could even be more important to them. I don't hold grudges because I had a good time there"
wtf is this guy's problem?
>: "I don't need that. For me it was clear back then that Bayern made a mistake by selling me. I knew that I was important to the team and could even be more important to them. I don't hold grudges because I had a good time there"
B&R
>wtf is this guy's problem?
Probably salty that Bayern has continuously made sure that his reputation in Germany is shit, despite winning the CL with Bayern and then getting shafted, after asking for Götze's sallary.
@93751138
still no luck with the sex? :(
this
only bauern virgins dislike kroos
beard is growing and so is the desire to scratch
how the fuck did Bayern make sure that his reputation in Germany is shit? Did Hoeneß send out Emails to all newspapers saying Kroos is to be considered shit now, did he hire a trollarmy to establish Querpasstoni as a nickname for him or how did that go down?
>implying anyone watched that
I think his tweets had a bigger impact
Unironically that's exactly what happened in that guy's mind
>defending weak mind players
messoi fan detected
Are you new to football? The presidents/managers give out "infos" on upcoming transfers to editors/journalists and ask for favors in return. Especially Bayern.
>did he hire a trollarmy to establish Querpasstoni as a nickname for him or how did that go down?
Funny that you mention that name. Guess what year that name became mainstream?
this
better man up and miss than acting like a coward
>Ja hallo, bin ich hier richtig bei der Bild Sportredaktion? Ule hier, aufgepasst: Ich sag euch jetzt an wem wir momentan Interesse haben und wer vielleicht nächsten Sommer kommen könnte, dafür schreibt ihr mir mal richtig den Kroos runter, das alte Verräterschwein. Alles klar? Prima.
>that one butthurt Ösi Dortmund fan
Ja hallo, bin ich hier beim Kicker? Ok, gut. Also folgendes: Der Lewandowski, der hat zwar Angebote aus England und Spanien, aber der bleibt jetzt mal mindestens noch ne Saison bei uns. Ja, ist fix. Ok, und jetzt zur Gegenleistung: Der Kroos, dieses Arschloch, der ist bei uns noch immer unten durch. Bringt mal paar Artikel wo ihr den richtig durchn Kakao zieht, mit allem drum rum. Ich meld mich dann wieder.
frog posts are extremely low quality off topic posts, just saying
Tell me again, why aren't all Ösis blocked from Yea Forums yet?
I really really hate buyern
thanks for reading
based
Nah he mostly posts ontopic tßh
theyre the best poster on this site, why should they get blocked?
posted the wrong pic. whatever
You literally made the same mistake you were criticized for again.
i'm ltierally the only good psoter in these threads
@93751498
you’re right, you should be banned instead
reminder that tom is literally drowning in pussy
Live scenes from this thread
im not austrian tho
i meant posting pictures of cartoon frogs, you absolute retards
yeah yeah funny stuff
oh....
I don't get it
You do realize thats how it literally went down right? No need to get salty, just because you dont understand how clubs and the media coexist.
everyone in this thread is retarded but me
i.4cdn.org
thanks for reading
as any of you niggers drive in or live close to Nürburgring?
live 50 km away
Xaver Schlager to Wolfsburg confirmed
>Austria international Xaver #Schlager has joined the Wolves from RB Salzburg. Welcome to Wolfsburg, Xaver!
live 1260,0 km away
did you drive in the circuit or watched any race there?
>Sollte sich ein Wechsel des 23-Jährigen zum deutschen Rekordmeister nicht realisieren lassen, haben die Bayern dem Bericht zufolge mit Ex-BVB-Profi Ousmane Dembélé eine hochkarätige Alternative auf der Liste. Der Vorstandsvorsitzende Karl-Heinz Rummenigge gelte intern als großer Befürworter des bis 2022 an den FC Barcelona gebundenen Offensivspielers.
literally called this weeks ago. they're getting desperate.
yes
marshalled there 2 times too
read
I live 667 km away
no he's too low IQ and Ulrich is senile and forgot about it as well.
Don't worry, Kroos will remind everybody
>„WAZ“: Embolo unterschreibt bei Gladbach
oh nein nein nein nein nein
reminder that Dembele is a literal Messi and left a giant pile of trash in his flat in Dortmund kek
>schalke
going from 2nd to absolute shambles within a season, it's almost impressive.
>selling one of your three good players
just >schalke things
Name the best player in Schalke now that Embolo left.
Nübel
lul, is caligiuri staying?
what do you call a feeder club for midtable teams?
a relegation contender
how it was?
Do you live in South France or Northwest France?
Raman better be a granate or they will definitely be relegated.
ja, guten Morgen, auch schon wach?
Yes, literally like that. But the rabbit hole goes much deeper than you think
Ich könnt euch Lappen schwuchtel mit einer Hand alle wegklatschen amk
Being a marshal is a fun experience but is honestly pretty boring after a while. When watching it depends on the m8s you are with. Last time i went to the 24 h was with some lads from Uni in 16 and that was awesome race and partywise.
ja moin, aber siggi brudi^^
WURSTL BROWSES /BUNDES/!?
Oh yeah, forgot about him.
Ulle? more like BULLE
Mental illness shouldnt be ignored. Go see a professional.
still traumatized?
you should really heed your own advice
>„Legalisiertes Mobbing“: Forscher fordern Abschaffung von Völkerball
>Völkerball ist moralisch verwerflich: Das besagt eine neue Studie von kanadischen Wissenschaftlern. Das Spiel würde Schüler „entmenschlichen“ und Mobbing legimitieren.
Gott strafe Kanada.
truly the next Neuer.
>Mobbing Forscher never expirienced the joy of throwing a ball as hard as you can into the face of the biggest cunt of the class
To this day I can still hear Jonas cry :)
As far I can see Leverkusen, RB Leizpig, BVB and Buyern still the strongest teams in /bundes/
always was chosen to play könig at school because i had big enough hands to grab the balls
it's called Strohmann though
bit gay tßh
I wouldnt underestimate Gladbach
Völkerball is the best thing at school, especially with boys girls mixed games.
read
I would
>Ab der kommenden Spielzeit müssen sich alle Profis der 36 Erst- und Zweitligisten einem Test zur Diagnose von möglichen Gehirnschäden unterziehen. Dies gab die Deutsche Fußball Liga (DFL) am Dienstag bekannt.
RIP Brainletersen
girls always had to collect the balls in the half outfields and the boys were at the backline and the midfieldcorner throwing the balls
well this rules out the Dembele transfer
On every picture Lahm posts on his Twitter he makes the exact same face, its kind of disturbing
Embolo is good, but Raffael is already very old, Hermann is nowhere near as his 14/15 15/16 form ( he's always dead ), Stindl is injured and Hazard is gone. They literally have to form a new attack
almans waren 1 fehler uezs
stop spamming, fipsi
>tfw last man standing
clear red
dufte, keule!
keule *sips* now THAT was youth speak.
all austrians must die
/bundes/ is retarded today, must be the (((40)))°C
It's winter frens
god, i wish i were there
We were given usb fans today at work. Fantastic. Glad to fight for better working conditions for our members while sitting inside a sauna.
>winter
fake, I see no snow
lahm was always a sociopath
I have only seen snow once...
Fresse Ulrich.
>Für die deutsche Vorzeige-Schiedsrichtern Bibiana Steinhaus (Langenhagen) ist die Frauenfußball-WM in Frankreich vorzeitig beendet.
>Die 40-Jährige hat in ihrem bisher einzigen Endrunden-Einsatz während der Vorrundenpartie am 12. Juni zwischen dem Gastgeber und Norwegen (2:1) laut des Weltverbandes FIFA eine Muskelverletzung erlitten.
f
I need a Kelle and an Eimer for the Saunaaufguss
>der wird bei uns nicht mehr gebraucht
Why would he explain his reasoning to a shill?
Traumatized from a gifted goal? If he had kept his knees to himself it would have been a foul by the forward
>worstösi has Hauptschul-tier reading comprehension
can't say I'm shocked
how was it?
jelly of all coastfags
nothing special, it wasn't like the snow I see on tv it was more like hail or ice cubs all over the place
jz 1 pidser
now post kimmich and his angry manlet compensating face
that sucks, hope you will see real snow some day
hatt auch grad war legga
thanks fren
Didnt they change the rules on this recently?
damn, there are probably more people living in a 5km radius around your place than i have met my whole life. Living in a city seems so alien to me.
What do you expect from customers?
You're right It's really shit, but it's funny because I don't live exactly in a big city.
Rural > Urban
mdr.de
Lok Leipzig vs Aue if anyone is interested
Lok just scored the 1:0
fetti was geht
Fabian Ernst’s Næstved Boldklub have signed Luis Fernando from Bahia.
He is the third Brazilian to sign for Næstved this summer, after Mateus Costa Sousa and Edson Souza Aquino.
reminder that denmark is verliebt in her
Forgot to took out the trash for 2 days and now i have to collect all the fucking fly cocoons. I fucking hate summer so much.
ok Im here again
BVB is still shit
19:09 Echte Liebe
Denmark is a lezzer?
Wow you learn something new everyday!
back from wörk jz
What do you do for a living?
ESTHER IS MY GIRL!
maymaying
based dorftrottel poster
where do you live
there
I post sponsored content and affiliate links in /bundes/
Balkan woman look is good
>"Meine Idee ist: Irgendwann wird ein chinesischer Spieler beim FC Bayern spielen", sagte der Präsident vor kurzem bei einem Businesstreffen.
>"Wenn wir am Samstag (…) um zwei Uhr spielen, damit in Schanghai oder Peking in Primetime live übertragen werden kann, drücken 300 Millionen Chinesen auf ihr iPhone und zahlen je einen Euro. Dann können sie sich etwa vorstellen, wo es hingeht."
Stumbled upon this relatively old Hoeneß interview (2017). Some might say that he lost his edge after he was released from prison, but looking at the nonsens he's spewing for the the past 3 years, I get the impression that he's actually starting to get senile.
some might say you are absolutely obsessed with Bayern
huh?
thats right
Welche ETF kaufen?
ugh
what's an ETF
*?
>at a business meeting
every meeting with ulli is a business meeting
have sex
*gropes your butt*
sup bebe ;)
yes
>Wie der italienische Transfer-Experte Gianluca Di Marzio berichtet, haben sich Inter Mailand und Hertha BSC auf eine Ablösesumme für Valentino Lazaro geeinigt. Die "Nerazzurri" überweisen für den 23-Jährigen 22 Millionen Euro an die Berliner, durch diverse Boni kann diese Summe noch weiter ansteigen.
era of the bull
can't find it
What a shame that he's leaving the Buli ;)
also: Sasa Kalajdzic (the almost murder victim from ) to Stuttgart
I mean " :^( " of course
Rattenball should go for another attacking midfielder.
thanks for reading
Nkunku?
Whoops, sorry. Just read they they buy a guy named Hannes Wolf from one of their farm teams.
Haven't watched much PSG the last season, but isn't he more of a No.8/b2b?
ugh, why did you guys post today so much again, now I all have to read it
It’s raining a lot at the athletics competition.
I don't give much of a shit about PSG either but it seems like he's been used as a forward by Tuchel.
>Shitto Moting
yes
yes
good post
Im halfway through, and so far, its pretty embarrassing
>razor hoeneß
ugh
let me help you with that
Over in West Germany
There's a football player
With sexy knees.
With sexy knees?
With sexy knees!
Talking 'bout a man with sexy knees -
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge
What a man.
Rummenigge
Rummenigge
I'm a fan.
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge
He's so strong.
Rummenigge. Rummenigge -
All night long.
Rummenigge
Rummenigge
All night long.
He's so tall
He's so blond
Two long legs
But all beyond.
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge .
What a man.
Rummenigge
Rummenigge
I'm a fan.
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge
He's so strong.
Rummenigge. Rummenigge -
All night long.
Rummenigge
Rummenigge
All night long.
First he traps the ball -
And then?
Karl-Heinnz Rummenigge
Puts it in
Puts it in
Puts it in.
Karl-Heinz Rummenigge puts it in.
Okay
ALL
NIGHT
LONG
yeah I also didnt like it, since I was one of those kids, that got their puberty a bit later. So what? Dont need to be a pussy about it.
>in further news: PE grades are unfair because of physical differences in people.
Yeah no shit.
based Würstchen
he is married to a zinken.
Not that I blame him, better to be married to be the love of your life than to a shallow boring annoying model that you grow tired off in 2 years.
Come on and sing alllllloooong HELLO! Is it meeeee you're looking for? lol
mehr wie FOTZENVERLETZUNG wie? HAHAHAHA
flies dont lay eggs, hatch and morph into flies in 2-4 days user....
>ihr honorar [your compensation]
>implying
He gets paid in Würstl
I grew fine, just kinda late, was still short with 15. Which was strange, since my father is over 190cm.
Were even at the doctors, checking my Handwurzelknochen, to predict it.
No, I didnt get roids to grow.
oha, das fasse ich jetzt nicht. was für eine unverschämtheit.
roids don't make your bones grow, HGH does. (bodybuilders use both)
hello, im here now
thank god, it will fall down to 13° here over night.
okay, just used the word since its been said about Messi all the time.
yes yes... makes you realize why higher temperatures correlate with more crimes... shit is driving you crazy
Messi got HGH to save him from dwarfism.
Is Gladbach cuck enough to take Embolo of Schalkes hands?
my boomer neighbours are all downloading 4K porn again and my bitrate can't get over 3Mbit ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh go outside you fucking normalfags the internet is for me
>having a shared internet connection with your neighbours
welcome to the best Germany of all time
omg that hairband on her, so cute
Fresse
schlecht geschissen wa?
ne sah noch besser aus als die Fotze da
jz 1 bier
>drinking alcohol
knirsch
I just nutted
think about that while you go to bed today
SDAX, fren
you'll support based Borussia
(alternatively, TecDAX)
mobie time
whaddya watchin?
days of being wild