Conor McGregor, Irish fighter from a few years back. Was once hyped to be on the road to becoming the GOAT, but only ever defeated a handful of manlets, had a few novelty fights, losing 2/3 including making himself and MMA look really, really bad in a fight against 40-something retired boxer Floyd Mayweather (who weighed 126 lbs when he fought in the Olympics). He was dominated by Khabib, a slightly-above-average wrestler, and he has never successfully defended a belt, making him a belt-holder but not a champion. In contrast, peple like Jon Jones and GSP have defended their belts 11 or so times.
Conor also spends money on junk, just like a typical rapper. Lots of rumours about booze and drug abuse as well as marital cheating. No idea about that shit.
mfw MMA fighters don't make any real money, unless their last names are >St. Pierre >Lesnar >or McGregor
But >hurr duur Fighter X made $500,000 That's $500,000 minus taxes (around 34% at least), minus gym costs, minus camps costs, minus publicist, agent and whatnot. And that's one paycheque. Maybe you get a fe wlike that - they still have to cover you for ~75-80 years. Plus: diminished quality of life due to injuries and CTE, and a dramatically shortened lifespan.
Chads don’t know how to handle getting mogged. Kinda makes me happy. I’m fat and poor and all but at least I’ve been mogged enough times to know how to fight back.
Ryder Martin
People who actually think those shit post accounts are “bots” are legit NPCs.
Connor Price
That would actually be epic. But I think Rumble would take it.
Oliver Murphy
>After serving two and a half years in the military, she was discharged when it was discovered she had attempted to take her own life and was subsequently hospitalised
>Conor has won at least one round of every single fight he's ever been in. That's pretty impressive if you ask me. That's not true. He didn't win a round against Sitenkov or Duffy or Diaz (Fight #1), and I don't remember him winning a round against Khabib though I hear his fanboys claiming it.
Anyway, verifiable fact: he HASN'T won a round in every fight.
Evan Cook
She's a tall weird lookin(back then) pasty nerdy chick that probably got bullied for her height or some shit.
Idk I would probably think about it a little harder but at least along the lines of >you are only famous for nearly killing pregnant women and cheating, you coked up nigger, and it is all you will be remembered for
Definitely not >b-but I am a good person why are you so meeaaan? Twitter look at how mean he is to me
Nolan Johnson
he’s a good brawler but that is it
William Clark
She’s not a fighter anymore, she’s a house wife and milk machine now
Benjamin Perry
Pasty is not the only kind of european skin tone mongoloid
Brody Cooper
Just hit him with the classic "SEETHING"
Jason Jones
cringe
Easton Cruz
Joe Rogan is the same height as TJ while wearing shoes...TJ is 5'6"...do the maths
MMA is obviously not a rich mans game. That being said, i don't even understand how you can afford to be a fighter when you make 12k per appearance on early premlims. Let's say Erik Koch fights on two cards a year, making 42k (3500 a month) in total. Bro, how can you even pay your trainer with that. Or your gas, or anything lole
Serious question. Would Jessica Andrade beat Ronda Rousey at 135?
Caleb Peterson
yeah i guess, but the UFC is not amateure league. People shouldn't be washing dishes to make a living there
Nicholas Powell
Yes
Nicholas Walker
There is a great episode of Happy Days where Fonzie has to fight some kid's dad but he's forced to reconcile with the fact that he can't fight because he's never actually had to because of his reputation and appearance of being a tough guy.
Luis Ramirez
Even prime Rousey?
Christopher Lopez
only Holly and Nunes can beat Ronda
Jeremiah Flores
Fabian Edwards got the finishing ability of the two.
Mason Taylor
Alright are you Leon Edwards manager Or just Cody fan's brother?
Landon Butler
na, Cyborg and Shevchenko as well
Liam Parker
I need to see Jessica Eye get shadow realmed. Someone sate me.
Adam Johnson
Women MMA advanced rapidly. Rousey couldn't beat any of the ranked fighters nowadays.
Owen Gutierrez
If she was still active she could
Wyatt Walker
No such thing as "Prime Rousey" she was the same level her entire career.
I was watching the Bellator press conference and it surprised me he's only had one fight go to decision. If anything that post was disrespecting Leon, wise up fansperg.
James Taylor
Congratulations Jade on graduating high school! The whole heem community is very proud of you!
Was just watching Joe Rogan stand up where he's talking about getting fucked in the ass by Brock Lesnar. Why is he so obsessed with discussing penises (especially black ones) and assfucking?
Paulie always seems high as fuck, his eyes as well.
Anthony Hall
The heel on that shoe is an absolute unit
Henry Smith
Is that Rebekah
Kevin Bailey
King Reina
Gabriel Ortiz
>I think the mindset necessary for successful stand up comedy is similar to that of the one necessary for martial arts, in many ways in fact. You just have to enter this flow state where the ideas just come out of you. You have to constantly work on the delivery of a joke over and over again and then you have to be prepared for your special, similar to a fight.
Rumble used to spar with Ngannou and said he wouldn’t fight him and he hits harder than anybody’s he’s fought.
Levi Gutierrez
Khabib is defeated
Connor Ortiz
That's some weak ass hip movement.
Chase Moore
MoiCANo
Evan Green
It was the first pic when I google ufc
Christopher Torres
she has a disgusting physique. I think birth control is fucking with women or something because their tits are always fucked up and flat once they hit 25. they also eat like shit. fuck wh*te w*men
He's going to get schooled by Ricky Simon. It's a terrible match up for him and I don't know why Sean Shelby would match him up with somebody that's going to kick his ass when it is in Faber's hometown and last fight
her tits are fucked up because she had surgery. doesn't she have a fucking free special dietary meal plan too?
pffffttt. lmmfao
Ryan Sanchez
We don't even create threads anymore blud we have more important stuff to do, what are your thoughts on the whole Nick Waldron situation?
Ryan Anderson
>that one fighter who deserves high ranking matchups and more promotion from the UFC but will simply always be overlooked in favour of Dana's pet projects like Toilet Till and Greg Hardy
What's their name, /heem/? For me, it's Elizeu Zaleski dos Santos.
what did you expect to happen you break dancing big nosed dipshit?
Xavier Sullivan
>we have more important stuff to do, What a cringe form of damage control. Loser.
Hudson Moore
Jojo Calderwood was a bad first fight for her and she probably had octagon jitters. I fully expect her to come out looking much better this time and heem meatball Molly.
>paulie looks down at his fists, they're a twisted mesh of mangled bone and sinew >artem smiles at him across the ring as he plods forwards >the bell rings >end of round 1
SAGE, if you're reading this: do something else. You're too gifted to end up getting almost killed in a ring, you could be anything. Go to Hollywood and be a movie star, or a gymnast in the Olympics. MMA is a sport for the dirt of society, the outcasts. You don't derserve this.
>Anonymous 06/21/19(Fri)03:02:59 No.93609878▶ > I would rather he just spams scat instead of what he's currently doing to be honest.
>greenlighting rule violations hit the jobcentre, weirdo.
Adam Stewart
AWW DID YOU HURT YOUR POOR WIDDLE KNEE THATS BASED
Chase Allen
>hairless >toothless >skinnyfat >poor eyesight >uggo chinkoid wife >5 viewers at best >weakest branch of the military >doesn't even train >keto faggot >father abandoned him >so dumb he got doxxed by an obese spammer with no legs >nasally voice >stutters like a bitch >can't recognize flags >lives on the west coast
Josiah Roberts
Airplane you there?
Nicholas Ortiz
Favourite fighter?
For me it's Henderson, Dan.
Isaac Rogers
>so dumb he got doxxed by an obese spammer with no legs LMFAO laughed so hard i felt my left pinky toe tingle
No that's what's so surprising I was never told you just tap to them don't fight them because once you feel pain the damage is already done, I was very lucky
Christopher Kelly
>tfw we will never get to see a nazi themed entrance completely with gas chamber pyrotechnics
Eli Evans
Derek deserves a lot of credit too he's an internet god
Jose Collins
Your can crushing days are over Ben, you're in with the journeymen now
Elias Cepeda has served as a writer and editor covering mixed martial arts and combat sports, as well as public and cultural affairs, since 2005. He began as a staff writer for InsideFighting, and not long thereafter became publisher and editor of the page. Cepeda then went to write for Yahoo! Sports’ boxing and MMA pages, and edited their Cagewriter blog. He was hired away by FOX Sports, but after several years departed over philosophical differences with the executive leadership around important issues of journalism ethics. A student of and sometime competitor in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and MMA since 1999, Elias brings a unique and vibrant presence to reporting, and enjoys trying to highlight shared humanity and connect common experiences from seemingly different worlds.
>ouchie muh tummy hurts mummy can I please stay home? :(
Luke Murphy
Based wholesome bobby knucks will dispatch that homo abomination for the good of humanity
Ian Peterson
>Jorge stumbles back over to his corner at the end of the round, collapses on the stool >his breath heaves in and out of his chest >he puts his hand to his head, pulls it away >what the fuck >it's covered in blood >wait that's just Ben Askren's blood >then..... then why do I feel like I'm losing? >you look up at the stadium screen >it's playing footage of you crawling around the cage on all fours, with Askren riding your back and slapping your ass >you try and read the words on the screen >wtf I can't decipher this did i get CTE'd >oh wait i cant read nvm >your team leaves the cage >you want to cry out "Don't leave me alone!" but you stifle it and bite down on your mouthguard >your opponent's face is a mask of blood but you can see his grin >you know he's gonna take you down and pretend to fuck your ass again >your face flushes red as your mind flashes back to the entire stadium laughing at you in the first round and brace to hear it again >you will never have another fight booked in your life after this embarrassment >round 2 with Ben Askren begins >boom roasted
Wow so neutral, I'm impressed. But what about if they were both in an old west style duel? I have a feeling that Mayweather would be quicker on the draw. But McGregor MIGHT be able to tank a shot. However, both of them get wrecked by ANNIE OAKLEY
This is the absolute worst /heem/ thread in recent memory and it's all because of you yank fucks Do better. I KNOW you have better banter somewhere in you.
This is honestly godawful. Still looking for the “earth and round and everything just don’t hit me again” post. Feels like it’s scrubbed from the internet.
Levi Barnes
Why is this stupid cunt always taking pictures with her stupid fucking dogs? Fucking dogfags need to kill themselves desu.
Is there literally ONE single general as CTE'd as this one? I popped into the figure skating one just to see what was happening and it seemed quite pleasant. I'm starting to think that we, as Mixed Martial Arts fans, are the absolute nadir of the sporting fan world, because Mixed Martial Arts itself is the nadir of the sports world.
Ayden Adams
disgusting
Joseph Lopez
On this week's episode of below the belt, Brendan is told by chin that there's a fighter who did gay porn to pay the bills he makes this face for a while and then does something completely shocking. He tells Chin to look it up for him so he can watch it. Chin thinks he's kidding but Schaub is actually serious and legitimately wants to watch gay porn on air so he can judge "what kind" of porn another male fighter did.
lol nigger it was barely a heem. he didn't even starch canboy, it was a knockdown. he continued pillowfisting canboy while canboy rose to his feet, and then for whatever reason herb dean stopped the fight.
canboy literally stood back up while masvidal was unloading.
Landon Robinson
nice body shots there
Adrian Anderson
Say "Canboy" again! Say "Canboy" to me one more goddamned time, I dare you, I double dare you motherfucker!
Jeremiah Edwards
Y'canboy
Gabriel Sanchez
>cowboy just stood up and absorbs 3 body shots >better stop the fight
why was this stopped, but Askren lying dead on the floor wasn't. I don't get Herb Dean at all. People call him the GOAT ref but he is so inconsistent and sometimes flat out retarded
BECAUSE MASVIDAL HAD KNOCKED HIM OUT JUST A FEW MINUTES AGO YOU MEGA CASUAL
Jace Walker
That's funny because you've posted about him twice today. I've only mentioned his actually entertaining brother
Zachary Young
Is this California?
Robert Brooks
>"Hey guys I'm not shutting down the division I'm cool" >Ruin the division by cutting everyone >"Wtf no one's watching this division I thought you guys wanted it to stay" >i"'m cutting the division, it's your fault for not watching"
Josiah Nelson
floyds so stupid he bought five copies of the same belt lol
Xavier Reed
>knocked him out >still standing and delivering combos on his feet lol okay cazzie
Jaxon Howard
Kek, alright fair enough Have a good one, like who you like
Brody Myers
Askren took like 3 clean shots and was attempting to advance postition while Canboy was sitting there covering up and offering nothing in return.
Grayson Sullivan
guys guys Masvidal/Cowboy is free on Youtube right now you can all watch it and come to a decision
I really don't know who won the story of the fight though, any ideas?
Hunter Scott
He was a banker which is a crime against humanity
Brandon Adams
How is this shocking to anyone? I mean look at the guy
>calling people cazzie >ummm lmao if u r standign up den da revaree cant stob da fyte!!! It doesn't matter if you are standing up or on the floor, many fights get rightly stopped when both opponents are standing, both in mma and boxing You lost this one buddeh Sit down and shut up
Joseph Miller
They’re all ElesDee123
Liam Williams
suck my dick you morbidly obese distgusting american
Thomas Diaz
t. retard if you watch the askren-robbie gnp from the other side askren is trying to get wrist control the whole time
Evan Miller
How was he so retarded so as to try shit on reddit while signed into his reddit account?
Austin Stewart
I don't know, why DID you do that?
Julian Jones
>many fights get rightly stopped when both opponents are standing quit being a stupid retard. we're not talking about many fights you dumb faggot, we're talking about one specific fight's stoppage. you can't appeal to empiricism in this argument, dumb faggot.
Evan Powell
Is Masvidal a safe underdog bet?
Hudson Clark
Dont ask stupid questions if you dont want an answer
Adrian Robinson
>No, I didn't think Aldo/Moicano got called early, he was beastin' all over him like Masvidal on Cowboy. Oh, and go easy on Trevor tonight, he's sore from putting me through the grinder today.
>completely turtling up against the cage while taking multiple heavy shots after being knocked flat on your back for the second time is a valid defense in an mma fight Go to bed early tonight buddy
Sebastian Roberts
That fight was rightly stopped cause cowboy was done, that's why you dont even see him protest it. How long ago was that even? 2 years ago? You're only showing everyone that you're a casual who knows nothing about combat sports.
Parker Williams
You now remember Duane "Bang" Ludwig.
Oliver Martinez
You think he let Rogan f*ck his wife?
Alexander Diaz
It's highly possible
Chase Howard
The MMA Vivisection is worse with guests.
Ethan Bell
go outside
Isaiah Nelson
i co-invented onnitposting
Leo Lewis
Zero chance Rogan hasn't blown Aubrey
Xavier Thomas
Does the Brit MMA fan who drives a lorry overnight for a living still post here? He used to talk about it in 2015. I always liked his perspective on fights.
Daniel Allen
Eddie Bravo>Joey Diaz>Joe Rogan>Brendan Schaub>>Bryan Callen Objectively speaking the correct order
I have a reddit account and still don't like the place
James Watson
runt. it's Edgy Brah > Joey Diaz > Bryan "The Cuck" Callen > Brendan Schaub > Joe Rogan
Sebastian Sullivan
Joey Diaz is a tiresome fat fucking bullshitting meme ADADA DA FUCKKIN GABAGOOLL AHHHH FUCKIN TAKE THE LSD AND FUCKIN AHHHH GET HIGH AND FUCKIN SHOT THE PRESIDENT OR SUM SHIT shut the fuck up you fat faggot He's like the cringe version of based eddie
Jose Edwards
Schaub makes me laugh, whether he means to or not, but has there ever been an episode enhanced by the presence of Bryan Callen?
Luke Adams
gonna have to agree
Christian Taylor
He lost to Maia
Parker Reyes
she is cute I want to massage the walls of her vagina with a vibrator until she orgasms :p haha
Ian Ross
It is interesting how he can tell five new stories every time he's doing a podcast. Guess his memory is just really good, huh?
Joseph Kelly
no, actually now that I’m looking at it this is hilarious
mostly because of how tiny he is
Chase King
>LISTEN, user, I WOULD HAVE ROBBED YOUR GRANDMOTHER BLIND IF IT WOULD HAVE LEAD TO ANOTHER DUSTING OF SMACK, DID YOU NOTICE I'M YELLING AND BARELY CONTINENT? WELL THAT'S FUCKING COMEDY IN THIS DAY AND AGE, SCREAM LIKE A CHILD, RANT ABOUT DRUGS, CALL YOUR FATHER A BAD MAN!!! KHALAFUCKINGBEEB JOE ROGANS!!!
He used to be pretty fucking funny, to be honest, even on TFATK. But lately he's been boring as fuck. Even with Will Sasso on the latest episode he's a shadow of his former self. Think he's going through a mid-life crisis.
Gonna go on a sick bender for Jon’s next fight. Who’s with me?
Jack Young
I'll bring the sandblaster
Brandon Walker
I hope he gets kicked right in the fucking stomach and it kills him
If based gay nigger had any sense he would go right for his hernia spot.
Tyler Torres
You didnt watch the fight, Cerrone was KO'd the prior round and Herb knew Cowboy was already broken. He was waiting for the first opportunity to step in to compensate for his missed chance to stop it in the first.
Callen, as Joe's best friend, has far better discussions with Joe and gets Joe to engage seriously in something if that's the kind of topic they get onto. When Schaub is on he just tells Joe to put on the video of the black guy running track and HIS MAWLNSTER COCK JUS FLOPS OUTTA HIS SHORTS B
Carson Ross
Shan't be doing anything of the sort.
Lucas Myers
pretty decent
Nathan White
>When your post is so unfunny you have to laugh at yourself
actually I was laughing at another American poster’s fine banter, but it is probably too high IQ for a bong
Till eats his own boogers
Brody Cruz
unironically how would he recover? or any fighter for that matter
Isaac Jones
I forgot how obvious American humour is, from fart jokes to the American office.
Dominic Bell
>watch the Lawler vs Asscream fight UFC posted on their YT channel >EVERY single one of the comments agree that asscream won and it was a fair stoppage regardless of getting KTO and spiked at the start
WTF??? HEEM TOLD ME THAT IT WAS A BS STOPPAGE AND THAT ROBBIE WON
No it genuinely was a terrible stoppage. If you think Robbie went unconscious for a femtosecond and then spring back to his feet you are a blind retard.
That choke was not going to tap him. The round was going to end 10-9 Lawler based on damage.
People listen to fucking Rogan too much. Literally just watch the stoppage with your own eyes.
Aaron Allen
tfw you notice he had a gun
Jackson Robinson
Literally what is the point of going to a ufc event? You are so far away you will have to watch it on the screen anyway and you can't hear the commentary
Someone got the picture of his face with 'heem sleepy'?
Aiden Garcia
this desu, people just eat whatever shit they're given these days. He wasn't out when the fight was stopped, that's what matters. This whole "w...well he WOULD have gone out!!" is just retarded shit cazzies are spreading because UFC fed it to them. Lawler doesn't really care, but objectively that was a shit stoppage and if you defend it you're anti JUSTBLEED, anti fighting and a mandrama loving turbo caz ruining the sport
You can't be right in the head if you're fan of a sport where the goal is to beat each other senseless. As a supporter of martial arts you have to embrace that fact.
Ryder Collins
If it was a gun then why didnt it go off or fall out when he fell on his ass twice
Henry Torres
what the fuck of course Herb is going to say it was fine he is the one who fucked up
Isaac Nguyen
i didnt see it for the longest time either, when the heemer drops him with the leg kick it looks like he thinks the cholo is going for it. credit to him not actually doing so
Joshua Thompson
how close is danis to a titleshot?
Gabriel Bennett
Yeah i guess you're right, the stoppage was ok. Sorry Herb
Julian Perez
It was an extremely subtle and nuanced post. It would take quite a long time to explain, you simply have to be fluent in /heem/speak and deeply invested in /heem/ culture to understand.
Zachary Howard
based and zhangpilled
Owen Turner
you never will
Daniel Adams
this is true with like 99% of all in person sport entertainment
He tagged them all except Castillo because he blocked him after Castillo went on that rant about how overrated he is
Carter Williams
so what does BOX means?
Zachary Gray
Last hurrah for a while and then I’ll be a sober sally like you
Alexander Russell
Bitch i'm Out for Xylophones
Matthew Lewis
Bare knuckle boxing belongs on Yea Forums
Thomas Williams
>he doesn't accept Joe's OHH HE HURT olive branch when an extremely boring wmma or bum fight is going on and larp that the fight is exciting along with the commentary team How do you make it through almost every single fight? Imagine watching dogshit prelims and undercard without commentary. Just watching women ISH ISH fruitlessly over and over again in silence
Bentley Clark
Bouts On Xanax
Brayden Edwards
ish ish is fap break, everyone knows that
Brody Scott
ree
Jace Walker
Oh for sure he's gonna hit him with those awlkward angels my guy KA-KOOOOAW
Let’s start calling malignani malignant p. /box/ will flip out
Caleb King
askren lost
Wyatt Kelly
dustin six years ago, max when he was 20, diaz is terrible, eddie sucks, mendes gasses in 1 round, aldo was a good fluke win though. its a great record if you're a brainlet.
Gavin Ward
>I really hate him so these wins don't count
Luke Martinez
redpilled
Thomas Turner
Hermansson should get the shot and he'd likely beat poodesanya easily.
David Richardson
likely.
Julian Smith
Funny how rogan says shaving his head was the best thing he every did yet he has to wear these stupid beanies half the time or else he looks like a golum
Angel Torres
smesh
Nathan Martinez
you boys reckon there'll be any suicides after Khabib subs Tony
Carter Moore
isn't that literally all of /heem/ for every fighter
Brandon Gray
based askren
William Murphy
Wow, I didn't know Americans watched ONE I live in the place where most Team Lakay people are. Am friends with Folayang too, cool dude
Camden Collins
>I really like him so I don't contextualize things
Cooper Campbell
Id heem you and your friends
Brayden Green
No, with context things get looked at more objectively and fanboys arguments usually get tempered by reality.
Hunter Robinson
All memes aside how hyped are we for BKFC? I think I'm unironically going to watch that over the UFC card. I'll probably tune in just to see the KZ fight.
Jaxon Fisher
Alex "Cowboy" Oliveira
Caleb Barnes
You could probably heem me, I'm a skinnyfat loser that watches anime and plays videogames all day
Jason Diaz
I I'm sorry, I dont want any trouble
Jordan Gomez
A lot of turbocazzies will believe anything the UFC tells them. You can literally watch Herb realize his mistake right after making it then apologize multiple times to Robbie. Since that's obviously super shitty for the sport he goes on Rogan and says oh yeah i totally made the right call....
Jackson Hernandez
Agree on all except Eddie, he beat RDA and Pettis, gave Dustin two really close fights and mounted him and was stood up, if he sucks then all of LW besides Conor, Tony, and Khabib suck. Also Mendes usually only gassed in 3 rounds, do your homework.
Xavier Powell
i take it back, w-we're cool man i was just joking w-with you
Austin Richardson
I guess it's an American thing. Women don't dress like that at all here.
Kayden Perry
that's what I thought you said but in all seriousness I tried the Team Lakay "training" for 2 days, almost killed myself
Lawler was clearly going to sleep, that choke was on. Watch Robbie's arm go limp and bounce off the mat. Numerous experts have concluded Robbie was done.
And most importantly, the result reflects that. You can be mad all you want, but Askren won the fight and the story of the fight.
Nathaniel Ortiz
Here's one people will hate but they need to hear regardless, Alvarez would've beat Ferguson had they fought.
Gavin Baker
Well clearly Askren was going to get knocked out from that GnP so the fight should have just been stopped there.
Liam Flores
Alex Emelianenko was so fucking quick and fast, he could have been better than Fedor
Grayson Long
Nice
Jonathan Peterson
Tony literally has a 12 inch reach advantage on eddie. Pls explain this ridiculous statement you ridiculous bong.
Ayden Johnson
Not quick enough to get away with rape
Ethan Torres
I want you to know that the absurdist repetition tha tpeople has been fomenting in the "Jamal was Asian" mocking quote finaly broke and made me lose my shit lauging when it caught me off guard in this post.
