Heem

>i-i-i-i-it's just b-business!! p-p-please
yeah he basically did though

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Thanks lad

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If it were a fight, Conor would be dead. Khabib simulated his death.

If it were a fight, he wouldn't have rules protecting him from getting himself mutilated with his retarded wrestlefaggotry

When is he coming back? I miss him :(

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If it was a real fight khabibs eyes would be clawed out if it got to the ground

You mean rules like standing up the fighters every 5 minutes, and often more frequently, thus favoring standup specialists?
You mean rules like giving the fighters a rest every 5 minutes, thus favoring cardiolets?

Its not like Conor didn't knee him in the back of the head regardless of the ref lel

He needs to retire. Huge can that got lucky

no links in the op
yeah i dont think this is the thread

>rabbit punch illegal
>grounded kicks illegal
>small joint manipulation illegal
>eye gouging illegal
>fish hooking Illegal
>hair pulling illegal
it isn't a real fight. Rules protect wrestlefucks from getting themselves ruined by these street fight tactics but if you want to gargle Khebab's splooge you should stop saying retarded cringe shit like he simulated Gregor's death

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But those are things Khabib would be doing to Conor.

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Rory MacDonald vs Neiman Gracie
Chael Sonnen vs Lyoto Machida
Dillon Danis vs Max Humphrey
Darrion Caldwell vs Kyoji Horiguchi
Ricky Bandejas vs Patrick Mix
Eduardo Dantas vs Juan Archuleta

The fights are tonight
Main card 10 p.m. ET
Prelims 6:30 p.m. ET

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155 vs 145.

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>mfw I sub a goof

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That's a decent card.

>So Conor tells me he wants part-ownership of the UFC. Heh-heh, isn't he awesome?

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Rory
Chael
Hump
Kyoji
Bandejas
Juan

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Rory
Chael
Dannis
Guchi
Bandejas
Archuleta

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So this is how they measure reach.
Amazing.
We finally understand.

THANK YOU BASED RENA

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Let me tell you something about Conor McGregor. He called me last night and told me he wants Khabib. In Russia.

good to see travis browne still getting work

lmao Khabib would destroy mcnuggets in a street fight. fuck that wannabe gangster

where does she upload pictures?

This is stupid, because it doesn't take into account how shoulder width affects your reach in different stances. But I guess you then need different reach numbers for different stances.

Reach is a meme stat.

Conor won the bus fight
Khabib won the MSG incident

Who wins the rubber match?

@sb_rena

>can't even be bothered to make the tape measurer straight

youtube.com/watch?v=7X8UMzTjZpU
>1:13:12 - Joe: "Anybody who tells you you can do anything you believe in... that is horseshit!"
>1:13:46 - Joe: "You could do anything. I firmly, absolutely believe that."

Is the pot taking its toll? Normally a few minutes pass between Joe saying the exact opposite of what he was saying earlier. This is Schaub tier.

>Conor won the bus fight
Conor settled out of court the bus fight*

>Khabib won the MSG incident
Khabib paid a million dollars for the MSG incident*

Joe has never been smart. He is just getting better at being a social chameleon

How is it that literal F level athletes are title contenders and card headliners in 2019?

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Best JRE guests:

Schaub
Eddie
Green martial arts man
Alex Jones

That's it. You cannot argue otherwise.

Rogan is lucky that Schaub took him under his wing and let him start a podcast and follow him into standup. He'd be nothing without Brendan. An absolutely zilch.

You’re a retard. First time he is talking about people in general, coming off a conversation about chuck Liddell still fighting. Second quote he is talking specifically to KLee about his individual abilities and potential. In short, he is saying not everybody can do anything, but KLee has the ability to do whatever he wants because he isn’t a sad dork like you crying on 4chanel.org.

In a street fight it wouldn't be 1v1, so it doesn't mean shit

that just reinforces my point that UFC is not representative of a real fight

UFC starts recruiting talents way too late. They need to open some good schools themselves and pay some D1 athletes before they go to play football or basketball etc.

>mma fighter
>t-they don’t fight though!
You learn something new everyday

dog walkers and trail walkers will be the next dagestani invasion in the ufc

Gracie
Sonnen
Danis
Horiguchi
Bandejas
Archuleta

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This is fighting not a sport

I bet you think karate Mcmartial arts tourneys are fights too don't you

If it's full contact. I saw some mexican get heemed with a wheelkick when i was 12 in a gay ass carrot tay tourney

there's always some kind of rules in every fight situation whether agreed upon or not. if your qualification for a fight means no rules and extreme danger then the only real fights are nuclear wars

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absolutely based Faberposter

Reminder that Conor tapped to a choke before it was even under the chin.

it's called a neck crank cazzie

Please let me get your jaw in a gable grip,lad
No tapping until you feel the choke tho

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cringe
lmao oh no please don’t squeeze my face bro

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>i was just pretending

better try than usual but you are officially an outed cazz

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>subs your jaw

heh, personnel

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big fan of blagoy here

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But I, too, watch the Joe Rogan Experience my friend.

What kind of a heartlet taps to a face sub

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Here is a neck crank popping a jaw out of socket
youtube.com/watch?v=S2TABunHeT4

>both hands on the mat
>doesn't even TRY to handfight the choke or even attempt to resist it in any way whatsoever
>choke not even under the chin
>just fucking taps out like hes in babbys first mma fight

atrocious

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>favorite MMA podcast? Why Believe You Me, of course.

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Brendan Schaub simply did not have what it takes to be a successful UFC fighter.

ABSOLUTELY BASED Swedebro

Here's looking at you, baby boy.

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Yeah that is weird how he wasn’t a successful UFC fighter yet fought on ppv main card almost every fight haha weird

Couldn’t he have moved so khabib was I’m back sitting position, so he wouldn’t have to post up on his hands? He could’ve then fought khabibs hands to get out of the choke

Dana knew his hilarious way of getting KO'd would entice people into buying just so they could see the niggerlipped doughboy grab for tweetie birds

This is what an SBG """"""""""purple belt"""""""""" looks like

Embede
youtube.com/watch?v=ZC24L8kYBfM

>Continuously folded after getting punched just once anywhere above the neck
>Successful

Remember BWADLEY kitona? me either

Travis Browne heems prime Schaub

Val!

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FACT: the virgin incels on this board who enjoy teasing and bullying Schaub would not be able to satisfy his girl in bed and wouldn’t even last a full minute.

uhh based based based!!!!!

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Wrestlers + headbutts would be more powerful than all of that gay shit you listed. Hair pulling? Really? Now that Elias is cut, that wouldn't help anybody.

Also, consider if grapplers were allowed to elbow you from anywhere, or knee you in the head from north-south or front headlock. Those would all be very powerful and very practical moves benefiting the grappler.

Wrestlefucking in MMA is only boring because the rules prevent wrestlers from brutally mauling people on the ground.

How effective is forehead to the nose?

Let's take a look at the numbers

ESPN+:
$49.99 for one year
$19.99 for one year if you sign up as you buy a ppv
$4.99 for a month
You get:
Most of UFC content (~80%)
Dana White's Contender Series
Access to a plurality of notable past UFC events ad free
Half of every PFL card
Large selection of NHL games out of market
Obscure college sporting events
Series A
English Cup
Out of market MLS games
And more

DAZN:
$99.99 for a year
$19.99 for a month
You get:
Bellator
Combate Americas
Road FC
Golden Boy Boxing
Matchroom Boxing
Some dopey baseball show

Wow I wonder what's the better value here

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Gracie
The undefeated GOAT Chael
Dillon "Landing Pad" Danis
Guchi
Mix
Juan

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*gouges your eyes as soon as you attempt to grab me*
Good luck with that takedown, my man.

>paying for the opportunity to pay $60
>not even getting full the PFL card
>still have to buy fight pass to watch prelims

You do not have to buy fight pass to watch any UFC event now.

Last week i would have laughed at this because i have bt sport but now the jewery has descended upon us too

I wish they offered free service if you tipped them off to say 100 illegal streams. As is they make it way too hard to contact them online.

Elaborate, I haven't followed the UK shit. Seems weird that you'd have to pay for an event airing at 3am

That's exactly what they're doing senpai
239 will be PPV in the UK, "BT Box Office"

any bong who pays to watch fights is a turbo brainlet

I guess espn+ has the early prelims too. They still advertise it as being only on fight pass though.

>Khabib mentioning in his interview that he likes football
>oh thats kinda cool, maybe you could actually have a conversation
>His favorite team is Lelverpoop
Can this guy get any less likeable?

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Easier said than done. Like 'just knock out the guy trying to take you down', which happens sometimes but probably less than 2% of takedown attempts end with the guy getting KOed.

Also, I know of at least two fights were fighters gouged their opponents eye out and still got choked out.

Good luck trying to keep my fingers out of your eye with both your arms on my body trying to shift my weight

this
Yuki Nakai got permablinded by an eye gouge and still won the fight (and the story for persevering through severe injury)

Go to an MMA gym and feel what it's like to get taken down by an experienced wrestler. It's fast and explosive. You won't even see it coming without training.

yeah for sure b experienced wrestlers are immune to getting poked in the eye

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youtube.com/channel/UCL89Opg7KVwX7CWE9IVOHlQ/videos

This. gracie's a piece of shit and never got what he deserved. Fucking retard blinded someone for some money, typical Brazilian monkey.

He got blinded by the dutch guy from ufc 1

Those are two experienced wrestlers in that .gif, not one. And one *very* experienced eye poker, who's been poking niggas in the eye on the biggest MMA stage for literal years.

youtube.com/watch?v=QVyh3cnybKM

Thoughts on thotts?

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Can Memean Gracie win tonight?

based to be honest desu

Depends on how flushed Rory shows up. He can certainly win if Rory isn't in good form.

There was no msg incident? Anyway conor won the 3rd round its 2-1

Don't ask how I know, but I have a *feeling* Rory is going to throw the fight.

Dillon "The Eagle Smasher" Danis will win.

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just woke up who are you going guys

Based Eddie alphachecking that goof Callen. My favorite part of this picture is Joe and Schaub are still happily talking about dicks or something in the background.

>satisfying women
You know horses cant post on /heem/ right?

Pinche nini I bet you're getting your amlocoins on a monthly basis

Ben "Chunky" Askren

Did you just say you watch CNN?

He will Anthony "Rumble" Johnson the fight and retire

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Robbie was out

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t. Rory

I unironically think that Artem will beat Paulie.
Paulie will jab a few times, then look down at his hands, and realize he has been disarmed by Lobov's forehead.

I got to university three days per week you fucking spic little shit cunt I bet you diner even have a degree

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>8 days since JRE
Did interviewing Kevin Pee take all the will out of him?

based sweary mexico

Is lima the /ourguy/ of lellator? Surely rory throws just to avoid fighting him again

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Kevin "piss" Pee is on of the most insufferable faggots alive

Ya acabaron las clases

this is the guy that apparently hated mma and his dream was comedy

"Kevin "piss" - kevin Pee

RIPPING ME INTO PIECES

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when is this bum fighting

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Learn some proper English Pinche naquete, going 3 days a week to your shitty public college to get a LAE degree means shit.

i enjoy the mexican squabbling and wish both of you a wonderful day

Val

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Thx m8 I'm just hoping for a based American Gangster win tonight

>shits on Woodley for inactivity
>will make his first title defense “at the end of the year”
Sasuga Kamaru

Wow, a gathering of many BIG, HUGE khabib fans in thread today. Almost as big as Blendo Schlonsky I took not long ago. So just one question:
Now that wrasler dominance in street fight is established (Nate slapping khabitch in one doesn't count ofc) what are some thaulghts on this bad boy here:
twitter.com/TheNotoriousMMA/status/1113432242221658112/photo/1
Reminder, this is khabib safe genes family, THEY DO EVERYTHING TOGETHER. Take baths and what not. Was this exception or am I to believe that he managed 1 TKO on 700 strikes and 3 subs on Gooby, MJ and whodafukisthatguy WHILE ON JUICE and not just EPO?

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Val!

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i invented urine pee

public? lmao I go to private university you worth shit you fucking prieto who voted amlo into power don’t ever reply to me or I will partirte la puta madre pendejo de mierda

Actually first it was a NFL player, than UFC fighter, then podcast host, and now stand up comedian.

What did he mean by this?

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i invented "i invented urine pee" piss

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Michael Bisping.

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What the fuck happened to GT? It used to be way better. la puta madre means something like your bitch mother and pendejo de mierda means piece of shit asshole or something equivalent

Lomachenko can save the flyweight division.

Cejudo vs Loma is a very competitive fight, Loma has wrestled. Just learn to kick and some BJJ, in 6 months he can start fighting contenders in main events.

Yes, he'd be expensive, but it would draw interest to the entire division.

Cool it with the racism okay?

partirte la madre means I will beat your ass or something like that

Sure juanito, your shitty private college de 2500 al mes makes you a total upper class member of society lol

Khabib is ducking Hall

this. based ryan would splinter his kneecaps

Link? I thought he was a Juve fan

you wish little Pablo, lest meet up so you can talk shit at my face, well that would be difficult if you heights 5’2 so if you don’t want to get heemed shut your fucking mouth and go to martirbate to traps or gay faggot shit like that you fucking cunt piece of shit oh y chinga tu puta madre te la canto en español para que entiendas pedazo de pendejo mamerto huele huevos me coji a tu hermana puñetas

twitter.com/lyotomachidafw/status/1139562883195576322

lads i didn't realise Bellator's card tonight was actually decent
I thought it was just Rena and Pico

>safe from the van when browsing loli piss vids

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LOL you piece of shit you wouldn't last a 3 round co main with me. I train kickboxing and wrestling you scrawny chilango, tus pinches mentadas de madre del establo de mexico son una mamada. Now go help your bitch ass mom at the tortilleria before I ankle pick your chilango ass

youtu.be/_-w1kdjK_70

I fucking love Mexicans now

>Green martial arts man

Who ?

its so funny the way you speak "spanish", sounds like little kids mixing up random words

kickboxing is a meme lmao I want to watch try your memekicks when I put my +5 years of boxing on your brown face and if you try to take me down y would just soccer kick you in the head because in a real fight there’s no rules and there’s no referees so you will not be able to hug me in the ground yes that’s it I won the war I won the story and the fight good bye norteñito I hope the cartel of Jalisco kill all of your fammily lmao

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absolutely based carlos

nobody asked you

Imagine how big he would be if he juiced like Brock

LOL good luck trying to stand up with me with your weak pillow fist hands Bryan, now go work at the tortas de tamal so el cartel de tepito Don't fuck up your puesto.

Tu te vas a la verga pinche gachupin mugroso

What's heem's season of the Ultimate Fighter?

The one where someone's kid is in unknown whereabouts.

P-Pinche puta, haha

Bellator is today, right?

You bet your raw damn hide, buster

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Forget it. Main event is 8am for Europe.

hes right though

>Tu te vas a la verga pinche gachupin mugroso
see?
shut up CHI manlet

this is our pettis vs. diaz sneak preview

I like JDS but magumbu is gonna shadow realm him, imagine his brain after cain beatings and now this.

Pene pequeño pinche puta

season five with based jens

imagine being a basketball fan watching your basketball show and out of the blue pops up ARIEEEEEEL HELWANNNNNNNI

He's not even from Toronto.
Do people from Montreal support the Toronto team?

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Why would they? Have you been to toronto? pajeets, asians and all sorts.

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Prime thorne heems my dick

It is? This card is pretty good.

Whats a good parlay for the main card?

Even better my man. How can you not love a long friday night getting drunk watching MMA with your boys?

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chupa my fucking pito pinche maricon tiene un boca de pescado

>google translate

No flawls, B. streamable.com/hvq2i

A grappler has to advance position to do damage in a real fight. Big John's kiked out mma ruleset protects them during takedowns and laying in guard playing pattycake. The guy on bottom in guard has the ADVANTAGE in a real fight.

The ufc was smart and realized instead of looking for the top talent they can look for the top tv deals instead.

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id heem every spic itt

>Funny, creative, and a beast of a work ethnic, no flawls my dude, he's gotta be humble too

Exactly how is she an F level athlete given how she's run through most of her opponents?

There was a MSG incident. It concluded with Khabib winning in the fourth round.

So it is 1-1 altogether.

>Being 0-2 against Kate Diaz

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What city are you at fuckface, imma heem yo ass

what rules are there for *during* takedowns though?
only I can think of is no 12-6 elbows

Conor vs Faber starring Artem Lobov and Ryan Hall

JDS vs Brock starring Tony Ferguson

And of course the one with Schaub and Kimbo

Donaghaugh

Man I geuinely do not know how to spell that name

He is GSP's coach or something like that.

p-put me back in......

h-hermosillo, y-you?

"I want that heavyweight money"

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Gracie
Machida
Danis
Horiguchi
Mix
Archuleta

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it ain't friday night though. First fight begins at 2am saturday morning and main event starts roughly 5am i think.

mty, you got lucky...

Based.

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Can't hit the back of head and neck, most vulnerable spots on the body left completely undefended thanks to faggots protecting wrestlers

Danaher you dummy. spelled how it sounds ya retarded red coat

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Cowboy to fight the winner of Diaz/Pettis? I like that idea. Nothing from UFC on this. I'm just speculating (i.e. repeating what I heard Schaub* speculate about)

*Brendan Schaub, former UFC fighter turned comedian.

>regiolard

lmao ok

>Sure thing Hank, we got you matched up with Stipe for a title eliminator

#heavyweightmoney

hitting the back of the head can make you blind or worse. I agree with the no spine and back of head rule. the real dumb shit it no soccer kicks, 12 to 6 elbows, and knees to a grounded opponent

>DA-RA-DARARA IT'S A MAAFAKEN S-A-GE
Fuck, miss precoke gooby so much

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It sounds fucking Irish.
Like Gallagher.
So I figured there'd be a gh in there somehwere.
I guess he simplified it to Danaher because he's a dumby, like you.

Nah I just checked. First fight is 00:30 CET, which means it is 23:30 for the UK boys. Main event is 4AM CET.

Cejudo wins by split decision

>dumby

you're not a native Englishman are you? if so lmao at the queen's english

perfect

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You better make sure you don't get hit in the neck then, huh? It's called being a skilled fighter not implementing faggot rules to favor folkstyle wrestling.

Sad truth: everybody's gonna love Sleepe again after he heems Canmier. HW unironically will become the most interesting division.

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Just noticed he was just giving himself some air, he wasn't tapping

*wins*

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Suck my balls fanny.

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>Lellator's first ever decent card tonight ft Rena and Horiguchi
>have jiu-jitsu competition in the morning
It's real tawlf b. Where do they broadcast the prelims?

GOAT

*wins*

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*the first 30 seconds before getting submitted*

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Why is the Smellator card on friday? There is no competition for them this weekend and the card is actually not bad, what was Scott Cucked thinking?

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based, thanks for this.

I think he was gonna scratch his neck but nate's arm was in the way making the ref think he was tapping, that happens really often at my gym

doesn't make much of a difference, people will still watch after work on a friday night. While they're tired from work on friday, they aren't on sunday and more prone to go out. Right choice.

Lollator has Aaron Pico and Heather Hardy buried in the prelims, not even headliner prelims. Coker officially seething

Their schedule is beyond me. They have fights the same time as UFC but put they good cars on Friday when there is no competition. It's like they don't want you to see it

>No WMMA on main card
based Coker.

>Watch exclusively on DAZN

Don't want anyone to see it confirmed

Imagine getting booked at the biggest comedy clubs in all because you're friends with Joe Rogan.

It's tough b

>DUDE IN A REAL FIGHT I WOULD JUST USE THESE SECRET FORBIDDEN TECHNIQUES AND INSTANTLY WIN

Imagine paying to see comedians be funny and instead Joe Rogan comes onstage

streamable.com/hvq2i

>DUDE I'M FUCKING RETARDED HURR DURR

WHATSUPPPP NEW YORKKKK WE HAVE A GREAT CARD FOR YOU TOMORROW NIGHT STARTING US OFF IN THE HEAVYWEIGHT DIVISION FRANCCIIIIIISSSSS THE PREDATOR NNNN---GUN---OWWWWWW

>DUDE IN A FAKE MMA FIGHT LET ME USE THESE RETARDED TECHNIQUES THAT THEY ARENT ALLOWED TO DEFEND AGAINST AND GET MY DEVASTATING DECISION """VICTORY"""

You're assuming the wrestler wouldn't be able to utilize these moves on you as well. It would be infinitely worse for you.

What does heen mean? I do not post on this board typically
Thanks!
Jason

HEEM EVERYONE EVEN MYSELF

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Conor was winning before he lost and the rematch victory is already on his official record

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Fuck that new belt looks so damn ugly

Just not attractive at all. Not a natural looking buttocks. And those boots women love look fucking childish.

Aldo wins the rematch

Which one

OH HES HURT THATS IT THATS IT CONOR DID KHABIB IS OUT

Wrestler on top in guard can't strike the back of head or neck and can't land any effective knees or kicks while being extremely vulnerable to them himself. Those powerful weapons are taken away from the bottom player because (((reasons)))

Unlikely. Conor is undefeated in rematches.

Here
Everyone
Exterminates
Manlets

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The frankie edgar one

Against Canor and he wins by submission (verbal)

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Here everyone eats meat

Gotta disagree, i think her ass is great

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>Yeah I mean what if he just fucked me like this right?

Attached: pQBnIkN.gif (315x338, 546K)

Lol you got no cage in a real fight to cushion you and give you position to elbow, youd be dropped on your fat fucking head

It's rare for a person's appearance to repulse me as strongly as Joe Rogan's does. I fucking hate looking at him and that gif makes me feel molested

Attached: fake.png (484x605, 311K)

He's a chode

While not as popular as heem, heen is certainly something you shouldn't avoid as
Hydration Everyday Especially Necessary

>guy on bottom in guard has the ADVANTAGE in a real fight.
What a fucking moron you are lmao

Attached: 2D17D7B7-3AA5-4AEB-B754-66274764D9B5.jpg (1310x873, 160K)

yikes

>standup is a craft bro... You gotta train it like its a martial art....
>UNHH UNHH UNHH BROCK SMASH BROCK FUCK YOUR ASS

kek you casual

ngannou heems jds
also
black mirror is the shittiest show I think that I ever tried watching

Black Mirror is kino

Cringe amerifat

im currently undefeated in the ufc

Pre -WMMA The Ultimate Fighter and Hell's Kitchen are the only ever kino shows

Reminder that Joe sees himself on the same level as Dave Chappelle

Attached: coker.png (186x241, 96K)

Damn. Im going to win big money with my Sonnen-Gracie parlay

Bookies are fucking retarded with these guys odds

I'm glad we can all agree that pre-dana UFC > post-dana UFC

How is WMMA profitable for the UFC? Isn't their one appeal supposed to be them posting pictures on Instagram? Headliners GDR & Aspen have fewer followers than "Mini Khabib."

ultra elite taste Yea Forums contrarians have entered

how about you have sex

Ariel is getting primetime on ESPN talking about basketball his dream of covering a real sport is finally coming true. From Dana White to Adam Silver. I wonder if he'll miss Dana.

Gracie isn’t going to win bro

more events since they have filler in the cards

Great comeback, retard. Im sure you can waddle your fat ass off the ground if you wheeze hard enough

Neither is Chael he loses on purpose. Remember he's a pathological liar and convicted felon he bets against himself.

Attached: cringe.webm (1280x720, 1.95M)

I certainly will not miss ariel
Although i cringe at the thought of fat luke being the number 1 mma journalist

AHEM...
tings glass
I think I can save MMA
Fuck manlet divisions (145& under, have the 145ers jump to 155 and if the can't handle it... fuck em)
Fuck WMMA
Fuck Dana White
Fuck Double Champ Champs
Fuck LegKicks
Fuck Boomers with CTE
Fuck Connor and Khabib
and last but not least FUCK JOE ROGAN, EDDIE BRAVO, and BRANDEN SCHAUB

Every time I watch something like this I wonder why people don't use their legs to defend themselves. You can clearly see that his pelvis isn't pinned and if he can do it (if he is flexible enough of course). I saw it only one time and it was in Bellator

cringe

Respect to ariel for finding a market with room for upstarts like himself and putting in work honestly

youtube.com/watch?v=t2wXffbJYrs

Two very positive people sharing a room full of positive vibes.

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Attached: Holloway.webm (1280x530, 237K)

how much money does that woman in the background get to stand there? isn't the bellator fighter starting pay literally $2,000?

>Two very positive people

I see what you did there.

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Every season is increasingly shit, new season is complete garbage

Rory has realized he needs to be a soldier of god not some pathetic submissive doormat. He's putting on a display of ultra violence to appease the lord tonight and ending the Gracie meme once and for all.

Attached: crusader_kings_2.jpg (854x480, 239K)

>FUCK EDDIE BRAVO
hold on brother im taking the belt home to 10th Planet before the year end

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Dave Chappelle sucks so he's not wrong

Attached: burroughs.png (589x659, 813K)

Bony "Rattled" Sperguson

ahhh Herb save me

Reminder that nigger struggled hard vs Gaethje in a pure folkstyle match

Help everyone except mexicans

"fear not the man who has practised 10,000 kicks, but the man who has trained one kick 10,000 times"

Reminder that this is a cope for hacks who don't have the capability to train an entire discipline

No the quote is correct and you are wrong

Heem is progressive and knows Mexicans are self-sufficient.

And that sand nigger will too

>renews the Gracie meme

Attached: IMG_5734.jpg (200x300, 10K)

wow guys really? nice language

Bookies love you

Attached: eye.png (532x253, 294K)

Interesting fact about Bruce Lee that I'll give was tha,t in 1963, Lee was almost drafted by the Army but he was deemed unfit for service because he had one undescended testicle and one of his legs was an inch longer than the other.

>alt-right comedy
Absolutely cringe

>mfw people claim that Jon "Bones your eye" Jones, Tony "el cucks your eye" Ferguson or Daniel "is fat and pokes your eye" Cormier are good fighters

Attached: mma is a real sport.jpg (1400x1400, 376K)

Pls dont downvote me

Bookies love this guy, he lives in a third world shithole and still donates to sports books.

do black people mog everyone in the us at wrestling ?

It wouldn't be a problem if refs weren't cucks and would take a point away or DQ if they can't continue

Dagestani samboniggers are the new Gracies
We just need to wait for our Sambo Sakuraba gaychee to get to work and end the meme

As a 5’11” 171lb of solid muscle and appropriately tasteful fat Americhad, I could unironically kill Bruce Lee in the ring

Tony is the modern day Sakuraba. Khabib is Rickson who's too pussy to fight him.

Rory
Sonnen
Danis
Mix
Dantas

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Joe Rogan is the epitome of le enlightened centrist he’s probably an unironic Biden supporter

could you be more faggy, plz

you now remember Pearl Gonzalez

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Attached: dios mio....png (760x651, 549K)

Schaub said he was doing some “girl” until she sent him a pick of “her” jacking off and he decided to back out. I’d say that proves Schaub isn’t gay. Apologies accepted.

Also, callen cheated on his wife.

*dmin
Not doonin

The are both HIV positive from dirty needles?

You missed one, friend

Anyone else have a feeling that Aspen Ladd is going to get fucking demolished by de Randamie

I personally do not give a single fuck about WMMA or female "athletes" of any kind.

don't know, don't care, won't watch

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Was this the most satisfying flushing of all time?

Attached: IMG_5736.jpg (1200x800, 134K)

youtube.com/watch?v=t2wXffbJYrs

Embmemdb

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Attached: px90 madamo.jpg (1080x1350, 442K)

so we are actually 3 Mexicans on /heem/?

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GERMAN HAIL STORM

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TALLINN BURGER FACTORY

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Dude your such a weirdo

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RPRXP6MCRRFCG816CYM8
KLN05ULKWDFNL6OWFHVQ
GJF4KILVMD1WFBGTH7E1
V1Z4DO7L
CANCUNT MEXICO

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FB9QGFZF3G63USTYO2JS
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ZHANG_GANG
VANDERPUMP RULES

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I'm not surprised motherfuckers

is this why you were posting callen's wife? also, have sex.

Schaub only fucks men and asian women

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Who else /SENIORSKIPDAY/ here?

Attached: el la cretura.jpg (1080x1350, 471K)

Name ONE picture with more talent

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Favorite part of Nevada? No trolling.

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NOT. A. FISH.

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The black belt Tony wears is the original black belt Eddie got from his master and Eddie gave it to Tony after he won his belt

What's your guys' favorite old, tired, overdone joke?

Uh, I literally don’t know what callen a wife looked like homeboy. I just heard Schaub reference it on the king and the sting. They were doing fuck, marry, kill w/ callen, Rogan and d’elia and Theo said he would marry callen because they both have trouble holding relationships together and Schaub bursts out that they will just be able to cheat on each other that way. There was another awkward reference to callen being kicked out of his house a couple months ago too.

My friend had a male cousin who changed genders and now xhe looks like mini khabib but as a 25 year old

People are actually picking a Gracie fighter in the year 2019?

yep, you spammed mrs. callen confirmed

We talmbout my boy Jamal?

Khabib is a good fighter

Instead I will post one of my flushed/en route to be flushed boys

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Ok dude

based fuck WMMA

I'm happy you can admit you're a liar :)

I've been studying brain damage/CTE in mma for several years now but the only fighter that I can pinpoint exactly when they went off the rails is Matt Hughes

kek

xD

How many bongs til Bingator?

As an expert on Cucuy Syndromd, I can confirm that this is the exact nanosecond in which Tony Ferguson realised that there was a man living inside his wall.

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Did he fuck your mother or something?

archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/text/matt hughes/country/CA/

Thompson is so aesthetic.

youtu.be/QajGp2tpV34
You can be too user. Get after it

This guy is literally GSP

Fights start in about 3-3 and a half hours

Rory
Sonnen
Caldwell
Danis
Mix
Dantas

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if ronald mcdonald is gay for jesus now why is he fighting??

Based Wondermeme finally getting into strength training too late into his career.

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My personal favorite.

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I mean his soft skin, his nipples, his face, muscle insertions, everything.

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>implying that NBA doesnt use a shitload of PEDs

is a very handsome bum

12 wins in the UFC. 9 stoppages. Boring.
Okay.gif

Thawlts on Jamal being Asian? What was Brenda’s writing process for that joke?

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imagine if wonderboy got into strength training years ago, he probably would have beat woodley both times, now he's just wondermeme and everyone has already figured out how to beat his meme karate style.

What have i become....
My sweetest friend.....
Everyone i know.....
Goes away.... in the end....

If i could start again, a million miles away.....
I would keep myself
I would find a way

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Peepé even finds ways to make his knockouts boring. He’s got as much personality as a bucket of rocks. He should stick to firefighting tbf

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Tbf rabbit punches really suck man, I wouldn't want to get one of those again or a sport where they are used to win, the rest is pretty meaningless

>Le I clearly felt the tap man

Dillon simulated khabibs death right there

Ufc is sellin u wolf tickets

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Conor would 100% kill Fatbib in a mortal kombat-style street fight to the death

what are the chances that chael actually beats lyoto tonight?

I like how he becomes more and more bitter towards matt with every year. Kind of terrifying
They don't use steroids. They use EPO type shit for endurance.
I've never heard Callen's joke but who ever was his editor should be fired. People are shitting on it but his special is solid 3/10. Not that bad

20%

Anything can happen in the octagon
Anything can happen in the streets

literally 0 chance, Ladd mauls her like a tame declawed circus cub and queefs in her face, keep seething

Well done, Khabib. Well done, Khabib. HOWEVER.
Recent events must be taken into account. And I have a few last-minute points to award. To Artem Lobov for the cool use of intellect... while in the face of great peril, to plant the seed for this fight... 50 points. Second, to Mr. Coach Kavanaugh, for the best wrestling coaching that I've have seen these many years, 50 points. And third... to Mr. Dillon Dannis... for pure nerve and outstanding courage, winning him the story of the fight... I award TheMacLife house 60 points.
Finally, it takes a great deal of bravery to not tap out and get choked unconcious... but a great deal more to tap out, almost immediately, in front of millions worldwide. I award 10 points... to Conor McGregor.
Assuming that my calculations are correct I believe... that a change of decoration is in order. Conor McGregor... Is the UFC Lightweight Champion

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biatch brothers are too scared to fight

woah buddy lets cool it with the racism

The last time bum nick won a fight was 2011 against flushed bj

I want her to win but she really is not that good at striking and is going to get beat up bad unless she has a great ground game

anyone betting on the fights tonight? what are your picks/parlays? Got 66 bucks i wanna use.

Would unironically steal this joke if I was the big brown

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17.8%
t. professional mma bettor

B A S E D
A
S
E
D

what are your picks for tonight fren?

Cute.

Not him, but I actually am a pro bettor and here is my bet.

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>he thinks Chael's undefeated record will be ended by boomer lyoto of all people

Chael finna dab on you

Mfw I still don't understand what Schaub meant by Eskimo brother shouldn#t talk trash or whatever the fuck he said.

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His is Danhard and you will give him hespectch

machida is a lock but i'm not too sure about rory, sometimes he comes out to fights already flushed and just isn't at 100%, what do you think? also any other bets? i got like 66 bucks i wanna double or triple.

youtube.com/watch?v=PmpLBVOkJhc

give a legend some love

I am SO much cooler than MMA fighters, and everyone in this thread.

If I were an MMA fighter, I wouldn't walk out to fucking Eminem or fucking... some well known metal band.

I'd walk out to an obscure sickening track that gets everyoe pumped.

And everytime, every time I walk out, I#'d have a new, different, but still very obscure song.

And everyone would know that I am cooler than you.

Dorks

Im betting the farm on me heemin (you)

Gucci heems Henry in the 1st

Eskimo brothers share the same girl. He dated Ronda Rousey. He's saying Dana was close to Ronda or maybe that he used her. For some reason that means they should argue. What a fucking stupid and unfunny man Schaub is

*picks your walkout song*

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shouldn't*

Okay.
But how does eskimo brothers relate to fucking the same girl? What is the connection?

I would walk out to
youtube.com/watch?v=QZbTpANdI54

post your slips

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true odds for btor 222
Neiman Gracie +295
Chael Sonnen +461
Patrick Mix -107
Eduardo Dantas +117
Darrion Caldwell -143

Bookies love him.

based dana knows all fighters have shit taste in music

>hey, man, don't talk shit, you already fucked my girl

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And that’s why you’re shitposting on 4channel and the real big brown is out G-g-killing the game

That's pretty cool.
I can remember being driven by my mother in the car and she'd play stuff like this. Back when I was young.

Not obscure enough for me though.

When i reach the ufc im gonna walk out to Takyon and heem Khabib

It’s from the tv show “the league” but I doubt most people even know that. Good show btw
youtu.be/e30VwCKZM10

>still ahead in winnings
they don't love me yet

>putting money on a 1/18

Id start a union if he dared interfere with my worker's right to a walkout song.

Eskimo sexual relationships are polyandrous

I laughed user :)
youtube.com/watch?v=351Aa5q_S98

WHERE YOU AT FRENCH!!!

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danas shows are stale as fuck.
youtube.com/watch?v=pJjZA_7KpGY

if rory loses i will literally chop my dick off

How obscure we talking?
You got any songs as an example?

when does bellator start

raised the return by 1000

>askjeeves.com

I;m talkig 400 youtube views obscure

youtube.com/watch?v=UV5FQaWaH-I
This would do for my first American walkout. I can do better, but I'm not revealing all my secrets to some bum (no offence, bum).

Thanks nerd.

I'm hemming so many after I consume his knowledge

Horiguchi, archuleta and possibly mix have good chance of landing, danis is guaranteed. Gracie and sonnen are highly unlikely, sonnen is a scumbag and probably takes a dive and bets on himself losing.

Your mum raised my dick by 1000

>that one autist that walks out to "obscure songs" then get's heemed shcaub style and we never seem him again

i like danis but kind of hope he loses just for the memes

If he keeps winning we can see him in the UFC for better memes you dip

i hope he wins

>that chad that walks out to sia songs

Hot opinion: Schaub is actually hilarious and a great com6

>not hoping he goes on a win streak and memes his way into the highest levels of competition like Elias

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I'm the obscure song chad.
I actually like Sia.

She's got my heemspect, which is a valuable thing, and let me tell you, poncho, it ain't easily earned.

The last time we saw Dillon in Lellator he had abysmal striking yet he still heemed Kebab some months after so I don't really know.

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Poor Danis, I make that face in pictures sometimes, I bet he thought he was making a nice slight smile instead of a weird annoyed gesture

Rate my walkout song
youtube.com/watch?v=e8-sMJZTYf0

cringe. i come out to this and win the story of the fight with it alone
youtube.com/watch?v=Oyg5iFddsJI

If it was a real fight, Conor would get his legs blown off

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Gracie
Sonnen
Danis
Horiguchi
Mix
Dantas

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What sia song?

>you will never walk out to "Oneohtrix Point Never - Power of Persuasion"

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I have history with this song.
Some guy who was trying to be my friends was trying to impress me with his music taste. Hey, let me tell ya, this is when we were 11 years old. Happy kids.
So he's trying to impress me. And so he writes the name of this song, this very song that you mention - he writes it on the cover of my French class notebook.
So that's my history with this song. I just told it ya.

tony subbed a roided up tibau

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it's called a redemption arc you simpleton, and that all starts with a -2500 loss

Quite a few man.
That early one, with the piano. Lock me up, whatever.
The ebin one with the lolli, Maddie Zeiger, dacing about Chanderlier.
The elastic heart with Shia Laveough (also my boy, I like that kid) is good too
And the more recent one with LSD and that nigger. Good song. You can hear Sia holding back on the vocals because she doesn't want to totally dominate the negro, even though I like that black guy too, to be honest.

Tony is the undisputed LW GOAT, he can do anything

kebab got bodied by a natty Tibau, really makes you ponder

You may have won the match.
Don't start the war.

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Get your picks in now or forever hold your peace I'm not taking them after this thread.

Breathe Me

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Gay, if you don't come out to Men of Harlech you aren't a real englishmen.

DC taught Khabib how to wrestle since then.

I walk out to folk songs about che guevara
youtube.com/watch?v=2ibEa5PrXMw

It's been swell sharing music knowledge with ya. I hope you goofs learnt a little something. Music is a part of life. You learn it, it's a decent sort of thing.

I'll catch ya another time. Good to see ya. It's yaboy here whose boy is Kevin Lee.

Dab out. ROLL OUT.
Peace.

I want to see her feminine benis

>his boy is Kevin "The Pisstown Peenom" Pee
get outta here bub

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Lelvin "Poops" Piss

Conor doesn't want this smoke

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HOW MANY BONGS?

So... Can anyone tell me how Weigh Lee Jang got a title shot?

2 hours and 15 minutes until the prelims.

The card is in China
Suarez is injured
JJ is coming off a loss
Rose is also injured

2 Bongs and 11 bings until the very first pre-cum

And Conor dealt the last blow of the night to Khabibs blood brother, winning his side the war

...

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>that grappling instinct
Logan Paul /heems/ champions whose name begin with K

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based

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5 hunnerd

I'd heem both of you princess

Around 5:30
youtube.com/watch?v=QpPZRxGpGrI

No problem homie, it’s the same show the Dana shoots a streamer gif is from