Heem

Still the best.

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Both Rose and Cowboy should have won by DQ

"Bug" Rose Namapoonas

That's what you get for throwing power shots in round 1. He was coasting by on heeming people early.

Tony's style of wrecking people with elbows and stiff jabs to the point they give up in between rounds is based. Cowboy took the easy way out

lowest quality thread so far

heeminder that 4 of Tony's wins have been by stoppage (3 by doctor, 1 by corner)

Can't sleep and there's a mosquito or more lurking buzzin and I can't see them. Just heem me.

oh one hundy purshent

Kattar sleeps Max

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Cowboy was losing. He loses his head movement midgame

I can and will heem not only you, but everyone in this damn thread

Jon Jones

oh one hundy purshent

Two giant cutbabbies

*crushes another can*

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DOWN GOES SCHAUB DOWN GOES SCHAUB!

lads have you ever tried unironically watching a shit fight to help you sleep

>yeah i really like tony ferguson, he is so autistic, he’s just like me.

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About time. I have iron chin tho so you should wrap your hands.

gain employment

>AND HE'S RIGHT BACK UP!
>MY GOD, JOE... THE HEART OF SCHAUB, UNBELIEVABLE!
>NOW SCHAUB'S SWINGIN', AND HE'S SWINGIN' FOR THE BLEACHERS!
>HE CLIPPED HIM, HE'S OUT! STOP THE FIGHT! STOP THE GOD DAMN FIGHT!
>AND IT IS ALLLLLL OVER! BRENDAN SCHAUB GETS IN DONE IN ROUND NUMBER 1... JUST... LIKE... THAT!
>WOOOOOOOOOOW!

Do this all the time with McGregor fights.

These featherweights are huge these days.

I miss goofy Goldie

OH TONY HURT BAD
ORTEGAS POURING ON THE PRESSURE
LOOK OUT FOR THE DARCE, THE DARCE!
HE'S GOT IT, HE'S GOT IT
TONY TAPPED, HE TAPPED IT'S OVER
WELCOME TO 155, BRIAN T-CITY ORTEGA

STOP THE FIGHT

JAMIE PULL UP BIG BLACK NIGGER DICK

Ortega got flushed by Holloway, how in the FUCK could he beat the Sperg? I was rooting for Cerrone btw

Rogan wouldn't stop saying this during 238, it was incredibly jarring

Cejudo just got on top of Moraes and before he landed any strikes Joe was saying it should be called

I would cream myself if this happened

And the crowd had the nerve to boo him...If you boo Tony you should probably stop watching MMA

This that dude who got leg kicked by Moicano for 15 minutes

Do casual fans actually like Joe Rogan freaking out like a faggot on commentary? It's so fucking annoying I mute it

joe rogan mentioned the calf kicks at least 100 times during the last ufc. we get it joe it's hard to put pressure on your leg if you get your calf kicked hard enough

KATLYN IS SEVERELY COMPROMISED BY THOSE LEG KICKS JOANNE HAS HER IN DEEP WATERS HER COACHES NEED TO END THIS COME ON

MUNHOZ IS HURTING ALJAMAIN BIG TIME THIS IS ABOUT TO GET VERY BAD HE CAN BARELY MOVE ON THEM ANYMORE ENOUGH IS ENOUGH SOMEONE PLEASE

THOSE LEG KICKS FROM MARKON ARE DESTROYING HENRY THIS FIGHT HAS TO BE STOPPED STOP THE FIGHT MARC STOP IT

Tbf there was a blatant hit after the horn

OOOOOOOOHHHHH HE TAGGED HIM HARD
HE IS HURT RIGHT NOW LOOK HE DOESN'T HAVE HIS LEGS UNDER HIM

...HE'S HIDING IT REALLY WELL

brendan schaub just texted me

heeminder Tony should have been DQ'd for cheating. Khabib won the story

>YOU GOIN' TO JAIL NOW

That's not what made him quit, he was getting sliced by elbows non-stop

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OOOOOOOOOOOH MARLON HURT HIM RIGHT BEFORE THE ROUND ENDED CEJUDO IS WOBBLING SOMEONE STOP IT

Holloway is way better than Ferguson, better striking, better chin.
>how in the FUCK could he beat the Sperg
Uppercut, ground and pound, Darce.

That punch made his nose break which caused him to blow it. Tony is a cheating fucking bitch and would get raped by Khabib

>you can only take so many of those

kek this will never not be funny

>That punch made his nose break
It was clearly broken earlier during the fight you absolute caz

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I gave you a reason why they might have been booing, nothing else

>these boys are going at it
>he's swinging for the bleachers
>OH HE'S HURT

It was broken way earlier and he decided to blow it right before the round began and his eye swole shut

Commentators keep mentioning how its a newer thing, where are they getting that from?

Bj put me back in

Moicano is 4 rounds up here, 10 seconds remaining
Oh he's looking for the finish
OHHHH KOREAN ZOMBIE SLEPT HIM ON THE BUZZER

I love watching this little guy fight

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Joes going cenile. His commentary consist of hyperbole and constantly repeating himself.

I guess hes just thoughtlessly blabbering and getting paid to enjoy the fights. Pretty comfy.

Really not a fan of this fanfiction tier posting lads

What happened to the days of genuinely witty and funny posts?

bro he is on DMT every broadcast

STOP THE FIIIIIIIIGHT

DC watching that Eye KO must have been traumatic

Attached: shin bone meets a can.webm (1280x720, 2.93M)

Don't think ufc keeps him because of his expertise. He's just that popular and a "company guy"

Bong is feeling the pressure at this moment
Based Bong relaxed and smiling
OHHH HE REVVED HIM

Attached: KZ KO.webm (1280x720, 2.93M)

They keep him cause he has the #1 podcast in the world otherwise they'd have gotten rid of him a long time ago

alright, this one was decent

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>Just look at Francis I mean look at the size of his legs. Could you imagin- OH HE CLIPPED HIM WITH A BIG RIGHT HAND
>OH HE'S HURT JDS IS CLEARLY HURT RIGHT NOW, NGANNOU IS LOOKING TO FINISH DOS SANTOS IS IN SERIOUS TROUBLE
>Ok it looks like Junior has recovered a little, and he shoots for the double leg here, will he get it?
>OHHHHHH MY GOD HE PULLED NGANNOUS TRUNKS CLEAN OFF, WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT THING? OHHHHHHHHHHHH WOW
>STOP THE FIGHT STOP THE FIGHT

>big john mogging both of these manlets
they really should hire midget refs for these turbo manlet division fights to create the illusion of two top athletes are fighting

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kamaru is such a sloppy pillow fisted bum. worst champ ever after sylvia.

can't believe the amount of posing these guys did during their fight

imagine if joe rogan was a ref. early stoppage every fight

>6 leg kicks land, or 2 oblique kicks
>bring in the Doctor to check on fighter

*wins*

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uhhh

>This size queen
I bet you watch WWE

>Artem doesn't seem to be in the zone right now, he's just getting WORKED by Paulie
>OHHHHH big cut opened over Lobov's eye. They may stop this fight
>Can't take too many of those
>OHHHHHHHH LOBOV CRACKS HIM
>Ladies and gentlemen we have a FIGHT
>These two guys just standing in the centre and BANGING, my goodness
>OHHHHHHHHH LOBOV WITH THE STANDING HAMMERFIST
>LOOKING TO FINISH THIS FIGHT
>HE'S DOWN HE'S DOWN THAT'S IT THAT'S IT
>ARTEM LOBOV IS THE NEW BKFC LIGHTWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD
>that's the best ever. That's the best ever right there

Yes, meant that with popular

R8 my parlay bitches

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>worst champ ever
Now this is what's called being a h8r

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...

That's a coors light

Hold on heem I'm posting

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can you guys post webms of ferguron cerone fight pls?

a certain old heem video has 12k views now

>be careful sir, the belt is very hot!

Make me

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I figured it would be the heemspeak one but that's only at 1.1k. Which one is it?

Cu de cachorro

*makes you*

Cejudo was unironically cringe then metad to where it was ironically cringey but he surpassed the threshold where the meta became overly self aware and cringey becoming unironically cringey again but it became so nauseating to a point where it became endearing and he is unaware of the cringeyness of his meta and it is now only ironically cringey and subtextually enjoyable

it's over 3 years old now

this one youtube.com/watch?v=xupyJ5OG9VI

Agreed

cant believe coral posted this

Last time Canor won a fight Obama was still president

>Still reminding people you were the "og champ champ"
>3 more people have gone ahead and shown that it's not even that hard to do ever since
>His last win was against a guy who's not even in the UFC anymore

I want mighty mouse to come back and heem him

>>Still reminding people you were the "og champ champ"
Dan Henderson says hello

>Dan Henderson says hello
That's nice of him, tell him /heem/ said hello back

238 was a bad night for people who think leg kicks matter

Leg kicks and good cardio matter

It is

If you search heem on youtube you can find this channel that just has webms from here. Still with the same filenames and stuff.
youtu.be/NP573JF3AOA
If you look two of the Alan Nuguette webms I made are on there.

nigga pls

huh, that's pretty strange

>gets cucked out of being recognised as champ champ because of semantics

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If he's champ champ then so is GSP. Which they aren't, because it means holding both at the same time

Those are some totally wasted digits.

Conor wins the rematch

no shut up
there's a big one coming up anyway
i'm not getting it because i'm here responding to you

Tony heems Khabib

we are all heem

KHABIB IS A CUTBABY

>because it means
This is what i mean about semantics
"Champ Champ" means literally nothing in Goober's case because he never defended either belt once. It may as well have been him holding the belts at different times because he had no intention of fighting at featherweight again. Gtfo with your akkkshually

this 2bh

NGANNOU!

Sorry because I'm on a roll today.

Someone heem these digits

sorry heem I tried

"champ champ" is the most meaningless accolade in this sport. All it means is you won the belt fighting at your natural weight and that you're really good at being a cutbabby.

I was one off the big digit bros..... im sorry i couldn't bring the belt back to /heem/

Heem never gets gets, schaub is dissapointed in all of you

MMA is my last sport. I'm almost finished with the NFL and if this shit sport loses my interest then that's all she wrote.

one day my brother

Russians always do that. You should see vk.

You don't have to defend you're belt to be champion lol, you just have to beat the champion at that weight and still have another belt from doing the same thing

haha relax it's ok man it happens

*stops responding to your posts*

>not taking the hockeypill

nice dubs tho

this one actually was early stoppage. if yair came close, kz would roll

We should make some sort of /heem/ discord, we could become close friends

Last hockey match I watched was one where Tony Twist fought like 3 dudes in one night.

It is what it is back to the drawing board

one exists already, but if I post an invite I get 3 spergs yelling at me for sharing le sekret club

last time I joined a discord they manipulated a poor soul into crossdressing and then continue to blackmail him

Are you ready for Henry going after the strawweight, flyweight, bantamweight and featherweight women's belts?

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Whose Aldo's retirement fight going to be?

his wife, then he gets heemed in brazilian jail

>I want heavyweight money

what did he mean by this

bieber vs cruise
who wins

heem is the most autistic general on sp yet we never acknowledge dubs, nice dubs bro

He's gonna go for One More Run At The Strap Brother and fight Ortega, but gets heemed and calls it a day

Cejudo

Pettis at burgerweight after he heems Nate

Aldo wins the rematch

Aldo would never.

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Why is Max pushed so hard by Joe? How can he call him the GOAT FW when he cuts 50 pound to beat up flushed aldo and a can then getting flushed by peahead

Cejudo for vacant featherweight belt once Holloway gets CTE diagnosis and vacates.

There goes UFC legend Jose Aldo

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It's hard to tell who Joe considers to be the GOAT. One day it's Yoel, the next it's Jon, then afterwards he'll say GSP, and at one point he said it was Ronda, the guy is so inconsistent and it's cause of all the drugs he does.

A J McKee kills both of them

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>a hater
this is an american term that no civilized person understands the meaning of. it appears, from the outside, to simply mean
>one who criticizes anything, at any time, for any reason

Hold on brother i haven't got my cummies yet

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Cejudo vs. Holloway would be a really funny fight given the height and reach advantage

Let our boy enjoy his burger money in America

If you think Usman is the worst champ ever you're a moron. Straight up.

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Does anyone else think Coral's obsession with Schaub is kind of um...creepy?

For the first minute, maybe. Then the humor would turn to horror as Cejudo knocks Holloway dead.

It's not an obsession, and also it's no different than someone who has a favorite basketball player and owns their jerseys etc

No.

>Cejudo just hammering Holloway with knees in the clinch
he might have to do flying knees everytime but still, scary stuff

He's a paid shill

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He hasn't defended it yet so we'll see, but natty goat is undeniably the GOAT worst champ, on the Mt. Rushmore with McGregor and DeRandsomething

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would you kiss the tip of his penis really quick for free tickets to his next comedy special?

No but you probably would for free.

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*ahem*

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Schaub was a terrible fighter, is a terrible analyst, and is a terrible comic. Stop fucking posting about him

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you never confirmed the status of your boipussy bro

DELET THIS, B!

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I would heem Bieber

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It's one sperg(coral) who's been at this for almost 4 years now, he stopped for a while but looks like he's back for good

What does that have to do with fighting, comedy, or MMA analysis?

I caught Coral jerking off to this webm in the bathroom last night. It was extremely disturbing to witness.

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You spend a lot of time in the bathroom.

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hopely dana talks bieber up to someone who can fuck him up, like the buff jonas brother

Is he the one who spams scat?

That special was one of the worst things I've ever seen.

No. But he's just as autistic.

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GSP

truly hope you're staying regular bro, schob bless

Can’t we all bond over Schaub’s stand up cawlmedy?

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nope
fight weekends are always a relief, in the middle of an existential crisis, I take solace in you telling me things do get better. Thanks for asking bro schaub bless.

K i cant watch shobs special but someone explain the "joke" hes telling in this pic

Uh sorry my mans dont know who that is

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Coral already admitted that the special was dogshit

>If I wanted to go pro, what steps would I take?
Stupid idea.
Here's why:
shortened lifespan
diminished quality of life
very, very poor pay

the very little bit of money those guys make has to stretch over a lifetime. have you ever seen Johnny Hendrick's house? he fought a lot and did well, but his house, well, you can see the difference between the major sports and mma, put it that way.
You're American, you'll have bigger and bigger healthcare bills as you get older - how are you going to afford that, wasting your peak earning years reducing your life-span in the octagon?

I said 6/10, thats far from dog poo

Something about him getting hella lit on weed and driving to macdawnalwds, b. The audience laughed for 5 minutes straight. Killing the game out here

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The joke is how he met this guy and he turned out to be asian

it was absolutely hyperbole but he's still a sloppy, pillow fisted bum

Jamal*
His Asian barber also happened to be really good at math

My low key boy Jimi Manuwa retired. Awful way to end your career

100 beibz vs 10 bork lazers when?

6/10 / no justify your reasoning. it was absolutely shit, I made it to the 12-minute mark and had to stop. had to.
the only positive thing was that he didn't seem to have a catch-phrase he was trying to make his own thing. that's the best I can say.
he should have rehearsed and practiced the physical bits - it came off like just any guy trying to be funny, and failing.

Tuivasa had an easy leg kick stoppage in the third if he weren’t a literal fucking retard who clinched up half the round for no reason

fuck that was bad. fuck you for reminding me.

Alright /heem/ so check this out. I went to go get my hair cut right before performing at the comedy store, right. My regular barber wasn't there though. So I ask who was going to cut my hair. They said it was Jamal. I'm thinking ok yeah niggers can cut hair pretty good, no problem, right? Then Jamal walks out of the bathroom.

Jamal was asian as fuuuuuck

You now remember O'malley vs. Soukhamthat

p4p lowest fight IQ in the game

He’s pretty decent at all three hater, find a job

Sad but was for the best. Another heem like that and he'd be legit retarded

HAHAHA

*cheats*

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I was genuinely disgusted by that, not really sure why. I wanted him cut from the UFC and shamed from the sport for that display.

He's decent at fighting and analysis, but at comedy he's fucking horrible

I was a fan of Manuwa but then he just started getting heemed brutally all the time so I'm glad he retired, poor guy started training mma when he was like 40

Coral whos your favorite ring girl ?

He started when he was 28 which is pretty old

>He's decent at fighting and analysis
Oh a hunnit persent the jab will land from awkward angles my guy

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It's extremely old. He's a huge outlier.

135lb men fighting each other is embarassing

Lose weight

Brittney in WEC days was my favorite all-time.

>He's decent at fighting

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I haven’t seen the special but he’s naturally funny in conversation. It’s weird that some guys are hilarious but their standup is shit, Theo Von and Nick Swardson for example

>I mean it's not like he was hitting me
>Well he was landing shots
>Oh I agree a hundred percent

He's accidentally funny

imagine if he juiced

no harm losing to even ufc bums

guys cut from the ufc could kill you and your 3 best buds before a hotpocket is done

He was already juiced Rampage exposed him

have you taken the Chrissy pill?

You mean the Lorenzopill? Yes.

Schaub never lost to any bums and had a few solid wins

>go onto youtube last night to watch the press conference
>live comment feed is just RIP JOE
>RIP JOE
>REST IN PIECE JOE
>RIP JOE HAD A HEART ATTACK RIP
>RIP JOE
>RIP SCHAUB
you schaub posters are literally youtube comments tier

Yo Coral if you drink a few double vodkas before you lose your V card you can fuck forever bro just a tip for you my guy

I haven't had time for anything /heem/ related for about a month. Somebody give me a quick rundown of what I missed.

just this bro

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he shouldn't take tips from a fat loser that pays for sex

did she died?

but im 5'11 150lbs bro

The only bad things I’d say about schaub are a) it’s pretty gay he gets to skip the line on his comedy career because of faggot Rogan, and 2) his wife is a gutter whore

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When we're talking about fighting, we're talking about in a professional sense, not in comparison to some random chump on Yea Forums.

Favourite TAWLF season?
I just finished 5 it was breddy gud

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Iaquinta is a can
Elias was robbed
Rose is a can
Anderson is old
Aldo is a pussy
Lee is a can
Smif is elite
Gus is a quitter
Tony is lucky
Cejudo is the p4p GOAT

Whittaker vs Romero 2, who won according to /heem/?

this guy is trolling but reddit really believes this. they think cowboy wins the rematch

Tony is such a bad match up for Khabib its not even funny

The fans

It was a GSP/Hendricks-esque victory for Whittaker joe

Any fights that deserve a rewatch?

>Canald Canboy Canrone
I cannoy believe I shilled the "Cowboy will headkick Tony" meme for WEEKS just for this dumb fucking hick to literally blow it all away. Fuck I wanted this so bad. I wanted all the Tony cucks to get shut up permanently. God damn it why can't anything EVER go right?

Five years ago maybe

Khabib Nurmagomedov > Michael Johnson > Tony Ferguson

>Smif is elite
>wtf
>see he beat Gustafsson
keeeeeek

Definitely watching that one.

They were only similar superficially. Whittaker at least did a lot of damage to Yoel (breaking his orbital, nose, wobbling him with headkick, etc). There wasn't a scratch on Hendricks. Also Robert unquestionably won two rounds, and I think the vast majority of people would agree he won three. GSP did fuck all that fight. Regardless of how one scored it, Robert/Yoel was a war, but GSP-Hendricks was not,

>Smif is elite
Wew
>Tony is lucky
LOL

Schaub>Mitrione>Fedor
Schaub GOAT confirmed by mma math

>Robert unquestionably won two rounds,
Cause Yoel was literally just standing around doing nothing

I've lost complete interest in seeing this fight; they've both declined significantly

Bevon Lewis vs Darren Stewart was a banger

Will Tony have to punch Khabib after the bell to beat him too?

Hendricks won 48-47, Whittaker lost 46-47

aint gonna be no bell Tiramisu

Khabib is getting d'arced early

based

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Oh for sure he couldn't finish Canbum but for sure he'll get Khabib my guy

Reminder, Whittaker is the GOAT

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>STOP THE FIGHT STOP THE FIGHT
>DQ HIM DQ WHITTAKER NOW
>HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE INJURE THAT PRIME SUPPLE BLACK BODY OF YOEL'S

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Canboy was content to strike with Tony so Tony obliged him.
Tiramisu is gonna try and wrestle Tony, and he'll find out that he's Afraid of The D'arce
Champ Shit Only

fuck that fight got me hyped, Whittakers rise was the best

He literally did finish him

For sure

>le fight once a year man
Can't wait for Adesanya to end this meme

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less than once a year

literally zero title defenses btw

Tony has a significant advantage over Khabib in striking and if a can like Canor could stop some of Khabib's takedowns then Khabib is in for a very long night of being elbowed, pressured and kicked non-stop

Oh yeah remember that time Tony subbed an elite grappler?

Yeah I remember him subbing Kevin Lee from the bottom

Remember that time goatfucker fought an elite grappler

lmao barely anything landed

>>le fight once a year man
you talking about Yoel

Tony put on a good fight, and he won... but undeniably, Cowboy won the story.

Didn't Tony just get taken down by Cowboy?

He made black belt Gleison Tibau tap in the first round. Gosh I wonder how Tiramisu would do against Gleison. Oh wait....

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>Poovin Pee
>elite grappler
OH NO NO NO NO
By that logic you also have to concede that RDA (who Khabib dominated) is also an elite grappler, considering he subbed him, right? Also that Iaquinta is an elite grappler as well?

>Gosh I wonder how Tiramisu would do against Gleison
Wait did Khabib lose this fight? Hm, that's awfully strange. When I check his record it says that he win and that he's undefeated. Tony on the other hand.....

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Can Valentina legitimately beat Khabib and Tony?

Be honest /heem/?

Iaquinta is a shit grappler and RDA easily wins the rematch

>considering he subbed him
You must be confused Abdul. Kevin Lee is an elite grappler, Tony subbed him. Also Khabib lost to Tibau and Tony choked Tibau out with relative ease.

I replied this
>

Tony has no chin so yes. Khabib would smash her face in.

100%

Only WMMA fighter on her level is Ronda.

wowwww I would not jerk off for a week then cum inside valentina when shes ovulating

idiot pervert

Protip: don't look too deep into Khabib's record. Just the last 4 or so fights.

It seems that you're confused my friend. I'm talking about Lee and RDA. Try to keep up, m'kay? Unless you're denying that RDA subbed Lee?

Iaquinta is a bum but it's funny how the first time Khabib comes up against someone who has even the slightest bit of wrestling knowledge and is unable to finish them. All Al had to do was give up his back and grab onto Khabib's hands and he was safe
Le Smesh XD got btfo by Bum Al. How on earth do you think Tony is gonna do then

actually its beautiful bro

Tony, No but Khabib is beatable like Conor and others. Can Shev out grapple Khabib that's the bigger question.

Lets not get carried away here, Kevin Lee is nowhere close to an elite grappler

Woah guys based Al absolutely btfo Khabum amirite? Le Khabitch exposed xD. War Al!!!!!

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Neither is Al yet he nullified Bumbib
The absolute state of russian grappling. The top guy isn't even at the level of bum tier US wrestlers

Easily the best. If he had the size, he would beat jon jones desu.

great welterweight fight

AL

HAM

DU

LI

LAH

The only thing worst than those attention seeker autists is the guys who call them out and give them recognition, hang yourself

>Tony has a significant advantage over Khabib in striking
Khabib will piece him up standing.

Coral doesn't seek attention, you absolute cazlord. Go study some /heem/ lore and try not to embarrass yourself so much, k?

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If Striking Was Easy It Would Be Called Sambo

>was

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Fuck off dumb cunt, nobody wants to see you defending your boyfriend in such a gross display of faggotry

I miss based MM so much. I still can't believe Dana traded the GOAT in his prime for Bum Asscream.

The can that khabib took down 26 times was a pretty accomplished division 2 wrestler. The problem with that “””record””” is good wrestlers don’t let the other guy get 25 escapes. Khabib would get completely embarrassed by pimple faced high schoolers if he tried to wrestle at his real size on a one hour weigh in

for sure i agree my man

but i disagree

>your boyfriend
Lmao I wish. Coral is a stud.

BASED

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Based And Redpilled.

based Brits
#snapjitsu #champshitonly

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Flat earthers gang

Cowboy intentionally caused his eye to swell. He knew not to blow his nose and he started digging into it while calling the doctor.

He has been completely exposed as a quitter on the levels of McNugget. Truly sad end for a journeyman gatekeeper.

youtu.be/rAGB9_63fY8

Tonyposters ITT make me embarrassed to be a fan

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Tony flushed Lee. Try and keep up.

>Subbed Chiesa
>Beat on Barbosa
>Body slammed Tony and was beating him up from mount
I wonder who you consider an elite grappler

Betting against Bam Bam Barbarena is a bad idea.

Glad I'm not the only one who saw this. Pettis pretended his hand was broken to get out of having to be in there for an extra round with the boogey man.

Tonyposters ITT Make Me Proud To Be A Tony Fan. -XTA- #ChampShitOnly #Hometeam #ImComingTiramisu #DuckNuggets

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Wanna see Tony move to 170 and salsa dance on Poosman and Poolby

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yeah and rude boy kinda sucks badly

usman vs tony, who has more cardio??

>cucks /heem/'s boy
Based Tony. No wonder so many faggots seethe on here

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>/heem/'s boy
huh?

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Will we ever see Tony v Kebab? Tony v Goober?

Canor didn't even respond to the LW fight from last night, he's too shook by Tony.

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ok

Kind of embarassing.

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what's his ceiling?

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>After every single event tweets shit out at the fighters
>The Boogeyman fights
>unmm uhhhh haha Tom Cruise where you at????
Canor is legit scared of El Cucuy. He doesn't want anything to do with him

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This. People try to break tony and get broken on tony.

That's because he knows Cowboy would have heemed him and Tony heemed Cowboy. Dude is done man

To cringe is to grasp

...

>when the chips are down he can pick them back up again

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Sorry I don't set foot outside based /heem/

yeah he's been saying that more and more. wonder if the jewfc is going to ask him to stop.

looked like a heat of the moment genuine accident to me

It seems Mexico poster has replaced our resident Greek poster. I want old /heem/ back

Protect yourself at all times

“If Dustin Poirier don’t do it, I’m going to do it,” Ferguson said. “Tiramisu [Khabib Nurmagomedov] needs an ass whooping. He needs two to the stomach from me. If it’s McNuggets [Conor McGregor] for a money fight or whatever. He’s an athlete, too. I know the division misses him inside here. I’m pretty sure he misses the fight game, too.

“I want to keep winning. What sounds better than 12 [wins in a row]? 13 — but it sounds a hell of a lot better with a title shot in that 13th victory.”

He continued on later in regards to both of them:

“If I were to fight Khabib, guaran-damn-tee you I would throw him from his feet to his back and beat him like in sambo like a five-point move in wrestling. That’s my background,” Ferguson said. “As far as McNuggets goes, I would love to stand toe-to-toe go with that dude.

“I respect him as an athlete. As a person, he’s kind of a douche. It’s improper 13, it literally is, and I got an attitude and I have a different agency right now, which is great. There’s no conflict of interest, that’s No. 1 and No. 2 is, I’m here to kick some ass. I ran out of bubble gum. We’re here to do business.”

Can Chael beat Machida? Intelligent responses only.

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This, Tony instantly apologised. Miragliotta was absolutely nowhere to be found. He knew full well it was on him so that's why he deducted no points, no nothing and just gave Tony the W

Tom Cruise would beat the living shit out of Justin Bieber

One time there was a thread on Yea Forums where an anonymous insider said that multiple fighters in the ufc had been through ronda and I'm 98% sure it was schaub. This was before gooby had any belts.

CTE the tweet

They are both on record breaking win streaks wtf are you talking about?

Can't believe Dana was shitting on Cejudo for claiming to be the GOAT brining up that slimy fuck Jones. Jones doesn't belong in same conversation as GSP,Khabib,Cejudo, fuck it even Conor.

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BASED

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Tony bless

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keep seething pussy

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prime schaub would heem ngannou

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Leave it to one cokehead defending another, Jones will NEVER be considered the GOAT. He's a cheater (just like his brothers) and will be remembered for that.

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No he's near unanimously considered the GOAT and likely always will be since MMA will only be around another few years before genetic engineering and stuff ruins sport

>he's near unanimously considered the GOAT
Maybe to retard casuals, he needed to cheat to beat Cormier and Gus. He will pop again

Hey pussy you still there?

>wah he cheated
truly the mark of a post-pride fc caz

I'm not crying Jon, I'm just sober.

>S-stop m-making fun of my boy!!!! CHEATERRR!! WAHHHHHH MOMMMYYYY

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>Hurr durr everyone in UFC is on steroids
>some CTE'd retard said so it must be true!!
That's how dumb you sound

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Jon beat pre-USADA Vitor, Prime Machida, Chael, Rampage, Shogun, Bonnar all these guys who were ALSO roiding. Literally everybody was on some shit and if you are gonna say Khabib is your boy well then you are retarded if you think he is natty.
I guarantee whoever you think is the goat is juicy as fuck. Shut up pussy. All time GOAT and you redditors will continue to seethe.

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If you genuinely believe that DC was natty while competing in the fucking Olympics then my man you are braindead

You're right, but guess what? They were old MW's that got tired of cutting weight, I like how you throw Khabib in there assuming he's roiding too just to cope. Jones should be at HW but uses his PED advantages to dominate LHW.

>If you genuinely believe that DC was natty while competing in the fucking Olympics then my man you are braindead
It doesn't matter what me or you think on this matter as he never popped for roids. Stay mad dicklett

>didn't mention ufc
>hur why you say this about ufc

tony cus he's not taking epo

We're discussing fighters that are currently rosters of UFC organization. Why pretend to be stupid?

Because we aren't discussing the UFC. The GOAT list for some includes fighters from outside the UFC. I mentioned Pride, you turn to Nate Diaz. Stop saying random shit and pretending you're clever.

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Name the GOAT then. Anderson, not slightly natty. GSP, not natty. Fedor, not an ounce of natty in his body
I like how you mentioned Khabib and Cejudo as if they are anywhere close to GOAT. They're natty neither

mfw rob heem's izzy

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The best fighters are in UFC as of right now, but let me guess, Brando Vera would heem Cormier 100%
Cejudo,GSP,Khabib, Cormier. Take your pick

>more random statements
last (you) you'll get from me

Ah yes, I too remember Tibau.

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Name someone outside UFC that is or even was worth a shit? I'm just following your stupid lead here.

ronda rousey

lol fucking rekt noob

DESTROYED

I mentioned PRIDE because you're a caz who cares about "cheating". You couldn't follow a fucking train CJ let alone a thread.

What could you possibly mean by this?

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Cheeky little twat
Who gives a fuck if some fighters that came into UFC roided in past. The only arguement you and the foul mouthed bong have is some weird fucking suspicion that fighters you don't like are cheaters too.

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not one person that you just mentioned is clean.

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>tfw you can flex on two division (You)FC champ just by standing up
Janni Bones only becomes GOAT if he moves to HW. Maybe it was his condition for roid coverup, but there's 0(ZERO) sense for him to stay in LHW. It's never a true bum division, but compared to him it is and he got 2 people left to clean the whole thing. He can do it in one summer. Lifts gazzilion pounds, beats DC who went to HW and got the belt. What, GOAT is afraid of noCHINereem or cameroonian wrasling skills?
The only other explanation is that he's afraid he will look bad vs Blaydes or Volkov (OSP fight or worse). But he won't probably even fight guys like that, unless they make it to the top. So WTF is there even to think about. If Amanda Dikenes headlines another New Year's card and JBJ scheduled to fight some LHW prospect that's out of his league, I might just give my IP to spammy.

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it's not a suspicion it's that I don't care and neither should you. roids are a necessary part of the sport if you want to maintain any level of quality.

Someone add this pasta to img, ufc "opponents" look just as bad as:
>But highlight can be deceptive like shaitan, so let's look at undeniable facts. Mighty Khabib fought literal beasts, and not those roided to the gills cans. Here's the list with their post Khabib records:
>Kamal Shalorus, 0-1 with loss to mighty RDA
>Gleison Tibau, 6-6 with totally not gatekeeper results
>Thiago Tavares, 2-2 in "FW Bout"
>Abel Killa Trujillo, 5-4 another nongatekeeper beast
>Pat Healy, Bam Bam's mfers to 0-3 record
>RDA, legend and really makes you think what would bear wrestler do to those pitiful WW contenders if RDA survived 5 rds against them
>Darrell "1-2" Horcher, poor guy shouldn't count, will tell his grandchildren that he fought the greatest!
>Michael Johnson, sick striker with barely 2-3 against lighter opponents
>Edson Barboza, another sick striker who failed against goat but would destroy bums like gayche or weaker wrestlers like Lee!
>Al, proved later that Lee stood no chance against savage eagle, he would smash gatekeeper like Cowboy in no time!
>Gooby, embarassed hype job, only took so long because he was making a point and guess what, gooby haven't fought since and retired!

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This

>roids are a necessary part of the sport if you want to maintain any level of quality.
Alright I'm off to bed, this current-time /heem/ is fucking retarded.

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Yoel clearly

You're the retard if you don't understand a huge section of the roster is juiced and that it directly raises the quality and quantity of fights we see. Even more retarded because you have an issue with it.

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It was either Whittaker or draw. Depends on how you score the last round

Robert, Unironically should have won via unanimous decision. the Judges we're Yoel dickriders obv.

GADAUUUOOOOOSHE

Has there ever been a more brutal sheem?

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Right on the temple.

Its the sound that really makes it. And the knowledge that DC was there feeling bile going up his throat.

baste

Tony Ferguson has the strangest stage prescience of any fighter I have ever watched. You could have interviewed a space alien after the fight and it would have been less unsettling than it would be with Tony.

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presence*

I wonder if she's even permanently aware she lost yet

Val is so much better than everyone else in that division

She is a beast of a peach.

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A strange people

I am not sure I believe the rumours of Cowboy flirtig with his fans' girlfriends in front of them.

It hasn't been confirmed in the same way that, for example, the rumour - that Cody Garbrandt's wife (pic related) stopped having sex with him after he lost to TJ - has been confirmed (by Cody himself).

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No shit, most of the girls on the roster are old nasty whores that aged out of the porn business with 2-7 records.

If that's the best looking woman you can get as a (former) UFC champion, then what the fuck is the point? I guess the neck tattoo and extra chromosome doesn't help his case.

hello, is this the Beiber/Cruise thread

Best post of the thread

This is a terrible thread. Shitty bait, fanfic, awful tired memes. Awful thread.

I'd eat her shit, to be honest.

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what's eddie thinking here bros?

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She's a megathot, of course someone that reptilian would reject a "loser". As for Cowboy, he's a fucking cowboy, he was probably just being charming.

spot on

He's thinking about how the UFC is going to fuck Tony harder than the aliens fucked their abductees.

You might not like it but this is what peak heterosexuality looks like.

I don't think anyone takes that old CTE-addled man seriously.
Is Eddie respected in any sort of way as a trainer, or is he a goofy burden like Steven Seagal?

Eddie fucking demolished Royler Gracie, he's beyond elite. You could have just googled that, though.

He is as respected (if not more) than Danaher. The reason people make fun of him is because they can't separate between coach Eddie who tapped Gracie and conspiracy theorist Eddie who believes that Earth is flat and CIA controls everything

She's the best female fighter and she beat Nunes at 215.

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wood berry hard

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Threadly reminder

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*sips*

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I don't watch that foreplay shit, sorry.

You didn't have to, do your own research.

Defend yourself at all times is said to every fighter every fight every event. it's a legitimate rule for these very situations or like when that one guy was winning at the olympics, then he heard a different fight's bell and stopped fighting and consequently got heemed

Tony

Cheated

>gets heemed by blowing his nose

how old are you? and why the fuck do you want to be a pro fighter?

REMINDER

youtube.com/watch?v=8YSGEaOoPhk

heh

I'll be damned, faggot.

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Ignore the Brit who keeps saying "Tony Cheated", he's been doing it for about 24 hours. The fucking retard picked Cowboy, or even bet on him, and he doesn't understand muscle memory or flowstate fighting.

his only notable win is over a guy with a current 0-2 record

Still can't believe the Nogueira brothers tried to feed a bus a carrot thinking it was a horse.

>that one guy was winning at the olympics, then he heard a different fight's bell and stopped fighting and consequently got heemed
who?

Schaubs wife is hawlt desu would bang. Brendan can watch.

>man in his early 20's overestimates his capabilities
NO

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For sure she's a pealst.

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The chael video above talks about him

ref should have stepped in faster, he was too far from action

Im jelly. Pls dont post them making out

Agreed, but still late and my point saying that was explaining why audience booed

>that brutal instant brain damage
as if women weren't dumb enough to begin with, now she's got it even worse

>this shot was intentional but cerones blowing his nose wasn’t

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Yeah she got manuwa'd. Head boink off the canvas and all.

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>Has there ever been a more brutal sheem?
Rose just got properly de-flowered.

Tony

Cheated

>so heemed his nervous system can't even do the fencing pose
poor Jimi, he had a hard life

this

Cowboy has always found ways to quit and still look TUFF for the fans. This wasn't the first time and it won't be the last

dumb argument because if he was anywhere near Jon Jones's size he'd have radically different physical capabilities. this is why p4p should be replaced with skill for skill

lol Assuncao sucks you blind nationalistic retard

keep

coping

shut the fuck up Luke

I suppose, but Eye was absolutely fucking dead for a long time and had to be reminded where she was.

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>Asssuncao would have clowned Cepoodo
no, he would have taken him to a terribly boring decision

This pic really makes me appreciate Cowboy desu

Karolina KOwalczczczczieczczh is up there i think

Still think Val's kick tops it

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Yeah its more brutal

So there is a secret heemcord? Who runs it? Or are you talking about the one Luke is a janny for?

>tfw her feet started twitching and they cut the camera instantly
there must be footage of it out there, she was clinically braindead for a good couple minutes

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lul yeah there was a long segment of the camera just being pinned to Val while they talked about how dead Eye was.

Based Tony has been doing this for a decade.
youtube.com/watch?v=d8tsTO9f16U

This is a God awful take. Don't think MMA is for you.

i ain't watching that, fuck you

They are both in their absolute prime and at their best, you fucking cazz holy shit. How has any of them declined? They haven't lost in a decade.

BASED BOBBY'S COACH CALLING HIM OUT YET AGAIN
youtube.com/watch?v=afVJxufeerE

*oblique kicks your knee*

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Is that podcast any good? The bald guy makes me uncomfortable

it’s curious how Valentina looks really shock after the knockout like if she legit thinks she killed her or something

Remember that time cowboy let RDA just beat him up for the title? I almost always forget RDA defended his belt in my head canon

it's not bad

Probably because he always did it on Fox and never ppvs

uhhhhhhhhhhhh rude???

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It was also just a meme title shot to keep RDA, cowboy was on a win streak of a bunch of unranked opponents

Fab is one of the most adequate and real people I've seen in my life. Bobbert is lucky as fuck to have someone like him in his team

that bald guy is probably the funniest host of any mma podcast

based russia and extended-state of russia

Joanna is a can

Kevin Lee is a can

Yair is a can

let me make the thread

vamos ahora mi compadre

gonna do it b4 u m80

>hits you hard

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kek

what would bobby b say about this?

>Khababy

New thread

...

Money