UEFA Nations League: Portugal vs Netherlands

Say the line, England!

Portugal and Netherlands are the only remaining /elite/ countries in the world.

1-1 Portugal wins

andorra has the highest cigarette consumption per capita per year

2-0 portugal

Even though Portugal represented only 1,3% of European population, it commited 38% of the Slave Trade overall
1-0 we win

>Pedro "the Fair" went on a killing spree to avenge his lover's death.

Portugal on penales. Wijnaldum and Van Dick losing their kiks

You can watch stars wars with cmd

3-1 Tsu

>the UNL is a glorified friendly tournament
that line?

TSUUUUUUUU

FUN FACT: Two of his sons by different mothers became kings of Portugal
ANOTHER FUN FACT: None of them was a son of his beloved
And I think The Fair was his first son, he was the Cruel or the Just. Like his Castillian nephew

He also engaged in homossexual behaviour

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I have had sex
Mathijs will pocket TTSSUUUU and Bergwijn will score the only goal in the game, it's going to be a scrappy one

How are they measuring consumption because millions of Spaniards drive up to stock up on them there since they're tax-free.

Also, Andorra's primary crop is tobacco. It's grown because they know tobacco companies will swoop in to buy up the entire crop just to ensure there's no competition for the aforementioned gargantuan cigarette market in the country. The entire seasonal crop is just burned and disposed of.

>Albania has the lowest IQ in Europe according to this map
>Semen-slurping 0-0

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Based triple digit alliance

Blue-tailed skinks' tails rip off very easily to help them escape predators

2-2, 3-2 for the Netherlands AET

So, if Netherlands wins, does van Dyke win the Balloon Door? Seems logical to me, unless they really want to wait until Messi chokes another CA to decide.

ur just as black henk

for me, it's TSU

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Even with Messi winning the CA I'd say Dyke deserves it more

Yeah, Barca choked too many things this season to give it to Messi 2bh. Same with Juventus and CR.

Whales have the longest known penis in the entire animal kingdom

2-1 for NL

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>known
Love the use of this word here. Like it's the best we've found but we're still holding out hope for something bigger. Humanity's quest for the mythical supermegapenis continues unabated.

humanity loves penises. thats why monoliths were so popular

For Messi to win the Ballon D'or, do we want Van Dick to clean house or Gaynaldo to TSU all over the place?
>inb4 burger, that flag, cringe, etc

Alfred Hitchcock did not have a belly button.

0-0 borefest with cillessen choking on penalties

>burger
>that flag
Cringe.

Jack Nicholson has lived with the idea his mother was his "sister" and that his grandparents were his "parents" for the first 37 years of his life. At that age he learned the truth about his family life.

2-1 Portugal. Ronaldo plays an anonymous game, but Portugal scrapes a victory.

you obviously don't understand english pendejo

etc

will the UEFA force England/Switzerland to play its good players or will it be all shitters?

15 yellow cards and 2 red cards

>watching the third place game

it will be all shitters either way

this is going to be portugal's 3rd final ever and 2nd on home soil. what if, we lose again like 2004

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you're not playing against a bus parking team so you should be fine

Fun fact: This will be the 4th (fourth) time we eliminate fucking toothpaste from championship contention
Another fun fact: I made this 2 minutes ago

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>when Portugal plays a final, the home team is one of the 2 contenders and will lose
but
>when Portugal faces the Netherlands in a competition, it's a great match that Portugal ultimately wins
neat, can't tell which curse will be broken
hope it's the former
also 3-0 PorTSUUgal

Based cuckelgian

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You forgot
>when the Netherlands faces the host country in a final, the Netherlands always loses

i hope the netherlands wins because i'm moving there next month

>Tsunaldo in beast mode
+1 to Portugal
>Final played in portugal
+1 to Portugal
>1 more day to rest and 90min vs 120min
+1 to Portugal
>Pepe out and Fonte is mediocre
+1 to the Netherlands
Final result:
Portugal 3-1 Netherlands
Screencap this post and bet all your life savings.

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Dutch is just german but whenever you speak it you sound like you gargle cock daily
3-1 portugal

Due to a clerical error after the Crimean war, the northern English border town of Berwick upon Tweed was legally still at war with Russia up until a few years ago when Russian officials visited to officially announce an end to the Crimean War.

Portugal 3-2 Netherlands

im sure you know what it feels like to gargle cock daily, dont you leaf

>0-0 borefest with cillessen choking on penalties
this is correct

you forgot
>Virgil Van Dijk
-3 goals to portugal
Portugal 0-1 Netherlands

*wins*

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England+Portugal is the worlds oldest military alliance dating back to the 1400’s
They’re also undefeated together.

3-2 to Portugal with TSUUUUU scoring the winning goal and his second of the game in overtime.

netherlands are the first winner of uefa nations league
portugal 1 - 2 netherlands

Aside from a few games, the Dutch NT normally struggle against the Portugese, even during periods where the Dutch had the better players. So myy bet is on a sneaky 1-0 victory for the Portugese.

HAHAHAHAHA

Seething

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Also, England cucked Portugal on the regular through history.

I think Messi is still frontrunner but just incase let's hope the anal raper of roasties has a quiet game.

There are no bumblebees in Australia
Portugal 2-3 Netherlands

The medical name for a butt crack is intergluteal cleft

0-0. Depay tries another Panenka, fails, portugalwinslol

finally the world will know who the greatest country in europe is, holland or portugal