/cric/ AusGODS World Cup

Nathan Mitchell Coulter-Nile
Steven Peter Devereux Smith
Say their names with reverent pride

Pakistan v India today (tonight)

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Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/KsVTpX7LdZQ
archive.4plebs.org/sp/thread/90860015/#q90863420
youtu.be/vMGpBAOD2CI
youtube.com/watch?v=hjZHfEIEJ54
twitter.com/MediaweekAUS/status/1136816419440480257
bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-48552349
twitter.com/thefirstsmyth/status/1116931765833043969?s=19
yorkshireccc.com/news/view/3527/retractable-all-sip-roof-set-for-headingley-cricket-ground
youtube.com/watch?v=xLrNHB5O6f8
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

usa

First Indian itt

Whoever wrote this is a genius.

My thumbs are too thick for touchscreen keyboard

Hannah Laity

Not bad desu
Don't worry about that now. The extremely based Pakis are going to beat your sorry arses today so badly you will want to give up Kashmir.

went to bed at 3, who won?

I don’t mean to embarrass you OP but it’s not India vs Pakistan today

Black caps.

Is Israel Folau a good batsman?

I thought you lads we're concentrated in lindon

India

/cric/ COPA ? Iam with kiwisbros

yeah my bad brah havent slept since last night , this weekend is looking grim for sleep too
>GGG
>ufc 238
>grig

I got excited, are they actually playing each other now after all the politics?! Weekend plans sounds good

Honestly don't care enough about sports to stay awake anymore. Earning money if more important. Maybe I'll stay up for the finals but that's it

>steals my webm
>doesn't post in my thread
absolute dog act

this
considered it last night because it was shaping up to be the match of the tournament but went to bed a little after gayle's wicket

How make money

Kek

how'd you go m8?

Walking

Simulating the results of tonight’s match in my head.

m’linga

youtu.be/KsVTpX7LdZQ

faggot

matt henry is STILL the highest wicket taker

NZ still at the top of the table.

>seething
Who hurt you?

yep. based.

think Yea Forums is more your speed mate

>PLEASE notice us we are relevant ok?
lmao

today, let's see if we can get to match time without the needless aggression and infighting lads

you and Englel started it cunt
dont back out now because we made an epic comeback
Should just merge caliphates

brainful

didn't take long did it.

its likely to get rained out so /cric/ will be fucked

This

thats what your mum told me

>that one angry Aussie blow-in
Ah yes. Reeks of /pol/ too.

>samefagging
Reeks of /nrl/ too.

Did you just self-own yourself making a your mum joke?

nah mate, just knew NZ and Englel would be upset over AusGODS winning even one game.
The booing by Britistanis whenever Smith allows them to see his godlike form, the seething kiwis upset their mantle of 'good guys' is about to be stomped on by punished Smith and co.
Karma you cunts, you didnt show an ounce of pity or empathy when our boys were at their lowest.
FUCK ENGLEL
FUCK NZ
PRAISE AUSGODS
AUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODSAUSGODS

cringe

captain has to go down with the ship

>youz cunts
>ausgods
>bongistanis
yep, pol and nrl

Absolute fucking state

Admirable

I see what you did there

>mfw were supposed to be shit
>mfw Smith is arguably the player of the tournament so far
>mfw lose all opening batsmen and still win
>mfw UMPS love AusGODS
>mfw RENT FREE
>mfw no solid team for last 12 months but still pwning
>mfw selling out stadiums because Englel butthurt pakimutts want to see us lose but we win
>mfw Smoth makes fiddy
>mfw Smoth cenno
>mfw we win the world cup
laughing non stop lately lads

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I have my moments

wahey

sorry mate footy on tonight. I'll likely instigate all the infighting then leave once the match starts

he's an /afl/ blow in too. was unironically spamming gore a few weeks ago

Righto.

starting to think afl and rug might be the good guys to nrl's bad guy.

umad?

reminder who the real cheats are at international sporting events

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/afl/ ----->

not really fussed tttt

straff

/afl/ and /nrl/ are bros mate. /rug/ is our sad downy cousin
lol SEETHING

trannies?

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:|

Neat.

dont know who that is m8
get a job you fucking old cunt and while youre at it lose weight

not going too well

Not sure why /afl/lad is upset lads. Who bullied him?

guessing his dad

infighting is based lad
like last night how you were angry posting every time Australia made a run or did anything good then happy as fuck and shitting on Australia when the Windies did good.
Now you dont want to argue or fling shit anymore because we won, its not hard to see.
You have to see this out to the end lad, till the cup is raised and we have a winner.
Youre committed and further strengthened your commitment last night with undiluted rage and hate, cant imagine what you were like as the windies dribbled the last shot to the boundary falling short of an unlosable game.
suck it up princess, dont run away now

certain man ITT is walking on thin ice

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real talk the kiwis are the worst for infighting here
often make boring contemptuous posts, think everyone is a cunt but them, no sense of humour beyond mild reddit jabs

>often make boring contemptuous posts
fucking keked ngl

pretty grim from the blow in

BASED

stands out like a sore thumb

why do you brown nose the kiwi nonces so much?

Sad stuff

appreciate it if the scaffolder use a proxy and post under the Caliphate of NZ flag please

I'm from New Zealand and moved to Australia to work.
Love my homeland but Australia has so much more to offer and is just a better country in general.
Still back my black caps though all day :)

rain all day in Bristol apparently go home boys

more like pisstol

fuck bristol
place only good for systematizing poos

We don't have nice mountains though.

OH NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

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Grim

:o

60 metres is a home run? Can't children do that?

>if it's outside the square then it doesn't count
LEL

>cricket in England

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OH MY

fuck off we're full

Made it to Australia before it was full lads

>of semen

*farts in your face*

OH NO NO NO NO NO

leaf btfo

welcome back seething kiwi.
good nana nap old fella?

lmao, imagine thinking this. my sister lives in aus and all her friends are moving back after realizing how overrated it is

was pounding your mum

depends on your intelligence I think

At least federer nadal are playing later

based scaffoldbro

>moving for work instead of working to improve where you live
Expected better from you lads

>imagine thinking it
I am literally a New Zealander living in Australia.
Felt like New Zealand was 20 years behind last time I returned for a visit and Jacinda is hellbent on turning our country into a refugee camp run by muslims and asians.
Shall be returning when the horse woman is gone

>tennis
ah yes, the finasteride of ball sports

ahh so you're a /pol/ incel, makes a lot more sense now

lads are in fine form this evening

yikes we dont want you back

what does this mean

you're an Australidn now.

>first /afl/
>now aus/pol/

I didn't know they transferred you back to Australia, Brenton.

as finasteride use repels women, as does watching tennis

okay. Fascinating

Bumsex business

STATSGOD

sandpaper sales at WC

based Statsy how's the Asian bf lad

Whats for tea lads?
pizza and pilsener here

getting t-bell in a bit here

Im maori I cant be racist. thats for white people
While youre all here please fuck off our lands so I can go back to my lands without the filth you people have bought.
Take the poos and chinese you love so much with you as well, blow ins

>da GC ah tuhuhu
stay there ya dumb coon.

Suspecting an Aussie as Kiwi LARP here lads.

Pathetic stuff by this /afl/ freshie

>high-calorie fast food at 11pm
This is why you're fat m8. Sort it out.

t.pol incel
t.correct
t.the real blow in scaffolder

Pathetic stuff yet again by this /afl/ freshie

next time I make an /afl/ you're not welcome my /pol/cunt ""friend""

only americans are responding to my pander thread :( when do the euros wake up?

/pol/ btfo

archive.4plebs.org/sp/thread/90860015/#q90863420
Same lad I reckon

about to poo

got some chicken kievs in the fridge mate, might cook them up

rogan josh

yikes

>afl
lol, literally netball these days and the 5 people samefagging make afl threads on the same level as nrl and wogball threads
RENT FREE BB

hmm

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Poo Pealanders and Englastanis eating humble pie with a side of Coulter Nile

As soon as NZ lose an important match I'll stop watching AMA

youtu.be/vMGpBAOD2CI

Been listening to this on repeat for 5 straight days, hours on end. AMA

>Depends on what you get
Diabetes?

me talking about based AFLX

A taco is about 200 calories. If you get two or three of them, you're fine.

KEK Fatguts deleting lawncunts US proxy posts

what do you mean?

yawn
tiresome

is sebbo attempting to falseflag other fatties so we believe this was a falseflag as well?

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hmm

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AusGODS railing draino with a woodstock getting ready for amateur fight night at the local RSL and the slampig reward at the end while Poo Pealanders spam f5 hoping for a (you) to distract from crippling loneliness

hope the lankans put up a fight desu, would rather see an interesting match

okay this is epic

>win game
>get angry at NZ
every fucking time kek

>AusGODS playing
>PooPealanders and Englistanis turn the SEETHE up to 10
every fucking time kek

it’s raining all day
no cricket

it's like re-reading 2015 Josh posts

Careful what you wish for. I have a feeling Pee Lanka might edge this one out, that is if they even get to play considering the weather

Reckon the pozzies will talk about us for the rest of the night

Reckon you should check the Windies AusGOD threads from last night.
Reckon you should stop trying to be humble and notice the amount of shitflinging from seething sheeprooters and Englel every time AusGODS did anything good.
Reckon you do this because you'll always be in the shadow of Australia.

the based kiwiGODs

this pozzie blow-ins seething kek

got this peewee on the ropes

Some pozzie just replied to me lads I'm not gonna read it

>I AM VERY ANGRY ABOUT /CRIC/ POSTS

really though is there anyone that's going to be close to aus?

*hears something from his shadow*

The Chad New Zealand top of the table
The virgin pozztralia second on the table

RENT FREE

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they'll be praying for rain when the have to face Big Strong NZ

Couldn't stand the sound of this piece of shit. Always muted the telly when he was on. Glad he's dead.

Try this one instead m8

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Reckon they'd both be up there laughing at the state of you

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yikes

and what a shadow it is Josh you obese fuck

There was a law of cricket broken at this incident
protip:It wasnt the delivery

new poe league tomorrow lads

feeling well-liked and confident lads

found sebbo in the wild again

You’re looking handsome and muscular as well m8

Visiting Mahabalipuram lads
Famous for ancient temples, beaches and surfing. Will keep you guys updated on latest developments.
Subscribe to my blog post

hey thanks

>surfing
Balis fucked now lad, never heard of Mahabalipurambut but just looked it up and the joint pumps.
cheers breh, surfing Sri Lanka later in the year, will be adding Mahabalipuram to my itinerary

BASED

Happy for you boro

thanks m8, means a lot

Tradies in Bintang wife beaters ruined Bali m8

combination of tradies, schoolies and going back a while Americans.
Soon as burgers found the place the fast food and corporation shit came in, lapped up by mum and dads taking the kids os for the first time.
Shits fucked but thats how it is, time to ruin another joint

where are you from

For me, it's Bukit Bintang.

Tossing the bat in anger?

Angas. why you asking bruz

You now remember Will Somerville

yes mate.
Article 2.1.8: Abuse of cricket equipment or clothing, ground equipment or fixtures and fittings during an International Match.
Yeah, someone cheated that day and it wasn't the aussies

day boo

It's a good point. Honestly worst case McKechnie's misconduct ought to offset any wrongdoing by the Aussies here.

Yes I’m sure that throwing his bat constituted an advantage like sanding the side of the fucking ball.

listening to this next to the fire brehs
youtube.com/watch?v=hjZHfEIEJ54

Lets stop fighting, we all love cricket and I'd help each and every one of you irl if you needed it.
Lets enjoy the game, respect the players and discuss our thoughts as civilised gentlemen.
good luck to your team

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>engages in conversation voluntarily with sebbesity
found the blow-in lads.

very unsportsmanlike throwing the bat like that
Leg theory tier

It's not about the effect mate, it's about how it brings the game into disrepute. McKechnie lowered the prestige of the sport down beneath rugby in that one rage-fueled moment.

Just blew in bros

*throws bat and calls you the bad guy*

Billie Eilish - Bad guy

Iceheads around the corner selling treated pine offcuts from building sites as firewood lads,
10 bucks a bag.
grim but hopeful

Yeah we get a lot of that in the states. Throw shit, blame the victim. Claim shit is oppression or racism or transphobia. They've even named it "black bloc" after the blackcaps.

Jesus. Do they still use arsenic in the treating compound down there?

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raining in Bristol lads

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Hmmmmmmmmmmm

honestly could also be used as a chart for pitch conditions as well

hheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheeheheheheheheheheheheheeh

griget

business idea: capitalise on england losing the wogball last night to entice english posters to watch cricket instead, since they're actually successful in cricket

make the thread mate

mad how smith and warner got YEAR long bans for something that most people get a match ban for at best
virtue signalling cost australia's unbeaten home record against india. was it worth it?

of course not. it was literally only the media and cazzies (who got sucked in by the media) who wanted them banned.

>successful
>L I T E R A L L Y going out in the group stage
let's be honest here, the real reason you want more british posters is so there are more people to laugh at when it goes wrong

shant be watching any of this world cup as it is well past my beddie byes

just dont want cricket to die in england mate. it'd be worse for us in the long run. also want more english flag here for the ashes haha

>was it worth it
To see the reaction of English fans when he hit his century and even when he walked out is well worth it, punished Steve is a different animal.
Is booing virtue signalling or just bad sportsmanship?

i just want english people to watch our sport ;_;

don't worry mate, the hundred is coming to save cricket in england
the problem was always that t20 is too complicated (?)

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ironic that >we're the bad guys even though >we rose above it all and decided to come down on something everyone was guilty of
smoth died for >our sins

lehmann was a cunt, no one would dream of arguing otherwise to be fair

good point
Broad literally cried during that tour

hundred seems more complicated
I saw the ECB contemplated removing lbw for it lol

this has aged poorly

i'm just bantering, it was a mistake and they have served a far greater punishment than the crime
I mostly just enjoyed it all coming down on warner's head after some of the sanctimonious crap he has come out with in the years prior. I don't think smith is a bad guy

SHALL be reading this to prepare for the coming of the hundred

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the format is ridiculously convoluted for anyone who actually knows anything about cricket
but that's not who they're targeting

might make this thread in the next 10 minutes or so. please post in it when i do

S H A L L
H
A
L
L

oi zachy, thoughts on the rape system in sussex? which rape is best rape? for me it's arundel.

I think it was because of Warner that the backlash was so bad, everyone was so sick of their behaviour as well as Lyon and all the other senior cunts. The sandpapering was simply like the franz ferdinand assasination, it justified all the ill feeling people felt about the team and sparked their resentment
Also you had the """leaders""" like Smith and Lehmann who just glossed over it all and never put the foot down, sometimes reckon they were the worst for that

At least South Africa aren't losing this weekend.

already got one mate but could do with an English orientated one

God almighty, reading this thread reaffirms how much /pol/fags need to be genocided

I don’t know what you’re talking about but arundel is based

We're going to get fucked on Monday

my bad, didnt see. ill bump this as more europoors start waking up.

Funny enough, when you get into metrology for machining, even inches is converted to decimal to make it more metric like, because converting everything to a common denominator sucks and fractions can only take you so far.

thanks. bit sickened by all the yank responses I'll got, next time I'll time is better

at least you lot should go all right at the rugby world cup and are still good at test cricket (the important cricket)

fairly certain at this point that the 2003 rwc is the only time I will see england win a world cup in my lifetime (any relevant sport)
world t20 is not a world cup and doesn't count

>still good at test cricket

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Lads I've bought tickets to the Eng v Afg game, have I made a mistake?

should be a good game, just hope you have life insurance.

worst case scenario: entertaining blowout
best: watch england capitulate to an embarrassing loss
it's win/win

>Shahzad out
I pity you

nah it'll be good
if england bat first you might get to see them smack 400+
i went to the aus v afg game last weekend and it was fun, the afghani fans are pretty entertaining

Hello and welcome to the 11th match of this 2019 World Cup. It's Pakistan taking on Sri Lanka, but right now it's prayers taking on the rain in a wet Bristol.

yeah I heard they're a real blast

>go to watch AusGODs lose
>they dont

twitter.com/MediaweekAUS/status/1136816419440480257
based

heard the fans can be rather explosive when they get fired up

>no cricket today
Grim

>afghani fans are pretty entertaining
So frickin’ true

how to tell an afghan woman from a paki one?

>brit at aussie game
>all booing steve
fuck you you pasty cunt, really happy you lost against pakistan and am looking forward to you not even making the finals

>cwc in engerland
>rains
who could have seen this coming lads?

>you in charge of handling banter

Lad.....

>finally got the day off, excited for some cricket
>pissing it down in Bristol
Well it's sunny here in Northumberland, so I'm off to the beach. Hope you get a few overs lads.

>tfw someone finally watches our sport but cant because its raining
FUCK sake we never should have hosted it in england

name one thing the english haven't ruined

no cricket today lads

10mins from the ground its pissing it down

hello i am here for cricket

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'chabin bla

bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-48552349

>India: Cricket:: America: World

a bit of SAT analogy question type for you zoomies who will never see it

breakfast

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fernandooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Decent weather here in Derbyshire too. Fuckin southern weather eh

/cric/
That was you.

>beans for breakfast
Fuck off

this tb h

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pissing it down on the south coast
not liking this reversal of fortune

am thinking this is the post

no it isn't
be quiet

brown nosing the old dart pretty hard there m8

why don't they play cricket indoors?

this is the post I reckon

corr

this is, without a doubt, not the post

looking good mate

umm..ya I will need 1 (one) quadruple bypass surgery to go boss, ta x

should wash your pucks desu

Al Noor mosque in Christchurch that was Australia

yer mum thought a lot about me post

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They do it's called indoor cricket you blow in cazzie deano

Reckon they should just hold it in Dubai every year from now on

>cazzie demo
oooooooooo

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Whenever I jerk off I need to pee like 20 minutes later so there's no point doing it before I want to go to sleep

why don't they play the world cup in doors?

just how badly is it raining right now lads?

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mog is the operative word here innit

Gonna order another maccas on Uber eats if anyone wants anything

it's over m8
go to bed

It's raining men, hallelujah, it's raining men, amen
I'm gonna go out to run and let myself get
Absolutely soaking wet

>no maccas on uber eats in my area
mfw

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yanks are grim

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Maccas is like 3 mins away from my place. Haven’t had anything from there in yonks though.

2 maccas and 2 burger kings in my area

looks like a used nappy

i live in inner Sydney and there is no Maccas within 15 mins of where I live

grim

Where exactly?

straffGOD

lower north shore

Think it’s time for some hot and spicy KFC desu lads

I got a spicy boner lads

Get some KFC from Artarmon instead lol

given the /cric/ is dead, what are we fapping to this evening lads?

Yeah I often get KFC from there on the way home from work

But the only thing I really like from there is the snackbox and $1 freezer

is north shore still really inner sydney
t. inner city

/afl/ is getting flooded with /pol/ again. might hang out here or /tennis/ for a bit

culturally no. its full of NIMBY upper class white boomers

in terms of proximity yeah. chatswong is the furthest extent of the lower north shore and that is only 9km from the cbd

why don't you go back to r/cricket?

business idea: /cric/ raid of a Taco Bell general to bully yanks

Just want to watch some cricket boys
Guess it’s the tennis instead

not really that close to the city though, always a pain getting over the harbour.

same
nadull in 4

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>always a pain getting over the harbour.
it is, but thats going to change significantly in the near future, now that .>we won both state and federal elections (pic related). >we are quite literally getting about $60bn of infastructure

>second harbour tunnel
>sydney metro
>westconnex (will fix victoria rd/ anzac bridge mess)

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One of them will retire injured. Lock it in

I was up for watching the tennis until I remembered it is worst major and there is no point

t. kyrgios

Spending time alone getting Drunk again noncey?

It’s fed v nadal. It’s always gonna be good

twitter.com/thefirstsmyth/status/1116931765833043969?s=19

just saw are konta lost the semi-final
what a shame for the """""""""""british"""""""""""" lass

He’s got to keep the beer fear away somehow

She was 5-3 up in both sets lmao what a shitter

Will they reschedule this PK match to tomorrow?

the LOYAL australian got through based

no
only the knockouts have reserve days

putting the tennis on lads, let me know if the rain stops, cheers.

Gay

its stopped mate they're doing the toss now

Might fire up the PS4 after I get back from Coles

spending your evening alone posting drivel about me on the cricket page of an anime website again?

I'm doing the toss right now lol

i'm pretty bored because nadal is literally going to break in the second game so, vitality blast on the cards

Listened to anecdotes by Joanna newsom 5 times this morning. Think it’s quite nice

manletchads report in

a full strength rent free

>/cric/ talking about tennis aka gruntball aka the most boring sport on the planet
The absolute state of this sub

oh ok lets discuss hte cricket that is currently not happening because of rain WHAT AN IDEA
which part of the ground do you think will be the most waterlogged, lads? I hope it isnt in the bowlers runup because then they will go all slippy slippy amd break their ankle LOL

business idea: indoor cricket

already exists. it's called 'indoor cricket'

why does her voice sound like an advertisement for giant butt plugs for straight men?

business idea: retractable roofs on all stadiums

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Made me laugh this

Did they end up building this at Headingley?

yorkshireccc.com/news/view/3527/retractable-all-sip-roof-set-for-headingley-cricket-ground

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Because you’re insecure about your sexuality and you live in a culture of oppression towards females and homosexuals

what do you mean... I'm a homosexual already

haha gay

Based

Brainful

What’s for lunch lads?
I’m going to get chips

for me kate bush is the best female artist

you must be very high iq with a big penis

falafel kebab

i am craving cricket

very cerebral post

hate the Spanish

>because of advanced mix racing

just telling it like it is

So if there’s no play today it goes down as a draw?

listening to James Acaster NF special lads. fucking based

yeah

His food podcast is pretty good
Stupid

what’s the alternative

Penalty shootout

Fuck this rain, >we just lost 2 easy points

THIS game in the tennis is huge

Which team? Pak?

complete fucking zoomer "comedian"

another match of course

absolutely cannot stand professional """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""comedians""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""

could work I guess

At the gym lads

Louis CK is unironically pretty funny

standups are so bad in this country, the only comedians I actually like that are based in the UK are irish
I blame the panel show circuit

just think it's a dead format. forced humour will never work in our increasingly plastic mainstream society

chokerror bottling it

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FUCK why hold it in rainy old england of all places

>I blame the panel show circuit
bet you've never actually been to any of their live shows

I think there is a real fear of sincerity these days
because being sincere is 'cringe'

never got stand up comedy, someone goes up on stage and you're expected to laugh being in the audience. The entire affair feels manufactured and fake desu

once you've listened to stand up for about a year or two you've heard all there really is to offer.

not many I admit but I have seen a few
why would I continually pay to go and see people I think are rubbish

yeah exactly it. maybe it worked in the past when it was more niche and you had to go to an event to watch them rather than being able to binge all their clips on youtube

my favourites becus you asked are
kevin bridges
theo von

then power gap
then people like jimmy carr
andrew santino
jon richardson

but i do admit the whole stand up 1 hour set can sometime be a let down when they are just putting a shit quality dvd out for the money

yikes

actually think a lot of comedians are funnier off-the-cuff than in their actual routines that they have spent hours crafting specifically to be funny
which is absurd

i honestly thought andre russel was well into his redemption arc post his "comeback" but ipl "success" has perhaps made him lose sight of the day to day. the manner of his dismissal reeked of a player whose ego has inflated beyond the scope of his team. the caribbean players seem to have no immunity to this disease.

deano my son

british panel shows died when they decided that they had to have at least one woman on every single programme
i'm sorry but women just aren't particularly funny and by encouraging tokenism you are actually making things even worse by lowering the bar for entry
and the ones that are actually physically attractive are the worst ones of all because they haven't realised men are only laughing at their jokes because they want to fuck them

the tennis is done
grim

they died when they figured out they could pump out absolute horseshit and people like you would keep watching

wow is it really I couldn't have possibly predicted the result . this is a real shock to the system

the only enjoyable panel show currently on british tv is wilty and qi

prove me wrong

thats two shows mate

i find theo von funny on podcasts but dont really enjoy his standup

any action yet lads?

Notice how punished Warner has a beard now, if you don't have a beard you might as well move to poo peeland.

why are we playing cricket in england

I CAAAANT STAND IT

>the only enjoyable panel show currently on british tv is wilty and qi
>thats two shows mate
wilty it is then. with qi, they have the foil of the episode theme to hide behind

swear hes only got like one special and its from like 4 years ago

its stopped raining

you weren't saying anything when all the previous matches were played to completion with no weather delays were you

wow good one lol very witty

FUCK England desu

anyone been playing cricket 19?

Go back home, the building industry is slowing down now, time to go back on the dole in Orcland.

beyond the rain it's ridiculous to see all the players wearing long sleeves and jumpers on the ground. state of england

it doesnt get as hot or cold here as most places. deal with it

Still playing my pirated Don Bradman 17

I like Stewart lee and I like John Robins.

would honestly buy it of they could get the actions right. Just for that

the faces are fine as they are, but how difficult could it be to just call lee, tait, donald etc in for a day of motion capture.

especially knowing the autists cricket fans are

I can appreciate that stewart lee is doing something a bit different and clever but I just don't find him funny
he doesnt make me laugh

is it autistic to download flacs and burn them to cds?

downloading flacs is incredibly autistic yes.

Waste of time and space.

well lads,
Does steelix float?

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>Junaid Naseer : "Such a disappointment it is that even with the latest technology available for weather forecasting, we still loose a whole game day that is not just an ordinary game but a worldcup's ...!! And Still World Cup is planned in such conditions with rain everywhere. I Hope there are some considerations in the future ...!! " - well technological progress is real, but we aren't yet at the stage where humanity can control the weather!
cricinfo commentator confirmed bluepilled

>but we aren't yet at the stage where humanity can control the weather
I thought China was doing the cloud seeding and busting thing before the 08 olympics to keep rain away. It's just a cost thing right?

total simpleton.

why do girls unmatch after a short conversation.

they have hundreds of blokes lined up and if you are not entertaining them they will move on to the next one

>trviago girl's new haircut

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of course not fucking idiots

pussy's for closers

>he doesn’t know the global leaders control our climate

Post a pic, lazy Pedo.

might just go to bed because there isn't a lot of point me being awake

iktf

stopped raining like a hour ago but still no start

Pretty much this

Met any Bulgarian guys, zachy?

I agree

Business idea:
Rain cricket

Back home lads

hate life and myself

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Hate this goblin

so true
Normal people are unquestionably funnier

Anyone listened to Joe rogan's podcast with Naval Ravikant?

back off pal
that's ellyse you're talking about not some half- amphibian montrosity from londontown

poothetic post

The Duke of Dorset

have listened to about 2 or 3 in the last year I reckon
I don't know if it's me that;s changed or joe but he has totally lost it imo, I used to listen to it all the time

Same, but heard good things about this one.

I dunno life’s ok, I’m too much of a aloof clown really to ever descend into any long lasting state of despair 2bh, just seems kind of dumb being actually depressed when you could have born a Bulgarian gypsy rummaging through bins for breakfast

Business idea:
Schedule all of Australia's matches for days with rain forecasted so they don't qualfiy

didnt ask mate

didn’t ask mate

Btfo

>it’s champions trophy all over again

you do make a good point though, I should be thankful for what I have because it could always be worse
but I'd rather compare my life to my colleagues and friends and feel like a piece of shit

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bought a painting of pengdiv

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Imagine the smell.

even english rain is racist as it didn't wan't paki's stepping onto the posh clay of bristol.

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at least half of bristol is a dump

>wan’t
>paki’s
Lad........

Tbh Pakistan won’t mind this at all,
Sri Lanka are a real bogey side for Pakistan and they probs would have lost

guess its been called off

>was actually looking forward to this match
based england ruining my evening

hope they dont give the paki scum there money back

Shall be playing some bing bing wahoo instead

no you weren't

Based.

Yeah you're right

my body refuses to cooperate with me when i force myself to communicate in what is objectively one of the most inferior languages of the world.

yeah even though it’s maybe not a great argument as there’s always somebody worse off than I can tell you’re a posh twerp and there’s basically nobody worse off than a Bulgarian gypsy

Forecast for tomorrow looks ok at least

truly hate americans lads but i love their total rejection of the wogball menace. it almost redeems them for me (until i read an americans post)

What’s stopping you from speaking in Urdu lol

got some whisky gonna suip

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Anyone remember cards against humanity?

no

that country is sinking further and further , no way it will be the world’s premier power in fifty years times. Absolutely no way

yes

pakistan has beaten srilanka in every world cup match. Plus they're coming off a high after beating the tournament favorites recently and this loss of momentum is probably bad for a notoriously unpredictable team.

yes. Pretty good bants

>he didn’t play cards against humanity with /cric/
Why so?

Are Tongans really like this?

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Ehh, maybe, but with China being on the other side.. you never know.

reckon I'm secretly handsome

tell me more. How many have they played?

don't live in the outer suburbs so I wouldn't know

embarrassed for this "sport" tßh, is this defined as a "close one" kek. Should ban Britain from hosting anything that involves clear skies

7 iirc. We always mog sl

I was far ahead of the curve by realising Chris Lilly wasn't funny back when he did We Can Be Heroes.

Chris Lilley actually is funny you ape.
Angry Boys is kino.

The works of Chris Lilley and Flight of the Conchords are the only two funny things AUSNZ have ever produced.

pakistan will not win another cricket match

official /cric/ meetup at Plovdiv food park festival tomorrow 12pm

Address of location - Mлaдeжкия хълм
4000 Plovdiv, Bulgaria

Eric bana used to be hilarious. Chopper is a great movie

dam, doesn’t really seem like that from memory, maybe in knock out events

The parallels to 92 are uncanny. Back then we lost the first match, won the second and the third was washed out. Coincidence? I think not

It's coming home lads, dare i say it.

deary me...

>summer in UK
>literally colder than Australian winter
lolwut

>hey look I'm in bulgaria by the way

I'm sitting here in 45C heat and it's 16C in Bristol. That's colder than it gets here in December, no wonder everyone wants to move

pleb opinions, I'm sad for you
Best thing out of NZ of obviously Back of The Y, but you wouldn't know that having never heard of it.
Chris Lilly is a shitter, considering Double The Fist was running concurrently with We Could Be Heroes and it got zero acknowledgement despite being to this day the funniest Australia had to offer in the 2000's

Explains why they're all depressed alcoholics.

it's not coming home buddy. Our team is a joke. watch as the top order collapses against the aussies.

weekend it was 30 degrees and sunny
our weather makes no sense

way more Indians kill themselves than Brits per capita, maybe a bit of alcoholism would do you good

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We're winning at least one game though. If we don't beat Australia, we're definitely beating India

Bit racist lad.

nah I’m not one of them. Not like bulgaria is something to brag about anyway really. Nothing really happens here

India is definitely winning against Pakistan.

If we can beat England we can beat you

so what happens if it rains on the day of the final?
do both sides get to share the trophy?

too old for you anyway, kid fucker

You think it's the convict genes that makes Australians habitual cheaters?

there are reserve days for the semis and final
if it rains all day on the reserve day as well? idk probably the hosts should get it regardless of whether they are actually in the final

Gets rescheduled I believe. Same with semis

>did i mention I'm in bulgaria?

How different is your squad now from the one in the Asia cup?

think it gets played the next day

nah they would be all tattered and barely wearable by now

you tried

have had an incredibly good week looks-wise

Match abandoned

>absolute state of English weather

Hmmmmm

youtube.com/watch?v=xLrNHB5O6f8
i fucking love athlean-x videos like this. theyre incredibly reassuring.

Pakistan has one chance against a top team.
Last time, it was against >us
This time, you already used that to beat Englel.

We beat 3 pretty good teams in the champions trophy
It can be done. Honestly if Amir gets your top order out quick the rest of the team is average

kek, nice """sport"""

The Aamir show is CANCELLED

Wahab show then

Amir is literally top 3 most valuable bowlers in one day cricket right now, literally never goes for many runs

The other two?

No he does sometimes. There's just always a threat of wickets with him though. He was much better before the ban

Still remember when Wahab Riaz dismissed Zaheer Khan back in 2011 and celebrated with a prostration. Grim.

I'd say bumrah and maybe rabada

honestly a Tragedy what happened,’without the ban he’d be incredible. You can tell he has the brain but his body just hasn’t developed like it could have. 5 years just such a long time, if it had been 2-3 years he’d probably still be great

rabada is a shit odi bowler and not even the best in his team, even starc and cumgod are better.

Was that the biggest India Pakistan match ever?

Yeah, haven’t seen anything like it recently

Not sure why Duanne Olivier wasn’t picked

he’s given up on SA and become kolpak m8

Fuck

he doesnt even live in sa lad. left after the pakistan series when he realised it was impossible to make it playing domestic cricket in SA due to quotas.

Sad state of affairs. Need the glorious Nigerian cricketing rise to continue to offset this African loss

no he realised playing international cricket was impossible due to quotas, SA domestic cricket is neither here nor there

remember yuvraj getting bowled first ball in that match and tendulkar being dropped about 6 separate times

>"My decision might be difficult for some to understand but being a professional cricket player is a short-lived career and in order for me to make the most of all my opportunities, I had to consider all my options,"
Christ

Pakistan and muslims in general really need to stop being so gay for allah , getting quite sick of it desu

Less gay than your obsession with Aamir

For me, this is not a hot dog.

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Wish ICC did something to end CSA’s quota rule

whens the cricket on lads could do with a good knock

no it’s not, be quiet yusuf

tomorrow at 5:30pm haha

hehe

Shut up.

Just fucking tone it down a bit yeah
Muslims are the Liverpool F.C. fans of religious ideology, just take it way too far

seething mullah kys

Can you lads take this one offline please?

I'm not a Muslim. But, imagine being gay for Amir. LOL

I’ve spent time with Mormons here in Plovdiv and they actually have chill game , like they joke about their religion and stuff but muslims are just full on pozzed for allah it’s pathetic

7:30pm ._.

Currently playing bing bing wahoo.

just seen a good post in this thread lads

Mormons are just larping panhandlers

Certain man ITT’s well-being depends upon falling in love soon

Nice logic retard

Seething paki.

>world cup in England
Good job

stick a bhaji up your bunghole
it rains during summer and that's the way we like it

Shilpa poppadom

My IQ is around 120 and my mum is a millionaire.’ Also I look pretty good and am cultured and well spoken

It rains in India too, based retard. Monsoons

didnt ask mate

Can't stand how the sauce is only on the top