/heem/ - Relaxed Champ Edition

wonder who revved him

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jesus they barely test the women

How the literal fuck is Andrade's wife so god damn ugly

Where is the Perry/Green hype?

prime janny would heem the spammer

Natty women are way too boring, B

dare I say it one of those moments where janny is based?

Who do you guys consider your favourite woman on the UFC's illustrious roster?

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The UFC needs to ditch flyweight (men's) and ADD women's atomweight.

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welp its about time for me to take real picks but the fake picks is getting responses so i guess i'll wait until the next thread

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>atomweight
>still that gut
Women are vile

For me it's Shevchenko

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>tfw Jones HEEMS Cuckmier at Heavyweight and takes his belt

how long would be the suicide watch?

DC literally deserves to have his kids hear his skull crack on the canvas. I hope Stipe pops that fucking tooth of his right back out of his mouth.

the virgin spammy the chad janny

"eh, you want some fuchkin haggis, kid"

literal goblin

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dc looks way more out of shape then he usually is. dude took such a long lay off holding the belt kinda lame

Stipe wins the rematch, DC wins the trilogy.
Bones heems them both

New Mookie and Cookie Level Change Podcast:

youtube.com/watch?v=bYyrSIxpYCo

>there are people who unironically watch femo*id mma

whens the next card this thread gay asf

Source on OPs pic?

Spammer, dare I say, Gadooshed and flushed by janny? Who would've thought.

So excited for the mma vivisection on thursday do you know when they release the episode? preferably in estonian time

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ESPN+ subscription

Id heem everybody itt

post the brick picture it has the relevant exif coordinates.

it doesnt

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is kinda disrepectful to Jack that they are treating him like he is on the level of CM Punk with these random out of shape lardasses pitted against him, when he was Division 1 wrestler and is way me athletic than semen spunk

wait so the spammer is LEGLESS???!!

it's 2:30 right now what time do they usually start Seattle time?

I got the legless spammer all revved up boys

Who?

post it i want to see it i lost it, you know that's a radeon vii, my mom paid BIG BUCKS for that lmfao

Sheem slammy

sorry blud i dont save your pics

great. don't make me post the camaro.

When will rose be champ again

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Here lad

ttyl

Reminder Rose is a can and if the announcers didn't oberhype "thug rose" casuals wouldn't be overrating her.

i just finished my workout for today, it feels great to be able to use my legs

lmao based

If Joanna would have went for a kimura she could have gotten KOed and won the story of the fight.

fucking based keep btfoing us blud

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based

Rose was out

Who is your favorite female fighter?

>Darren Elkins vs Ryan Hall confirmed

ABSOLUTELY BASED

Nice absolute peach of a fight for our boy. Bless elkins for his sacrifice.

*blinks*
*blinks again*
*iminari rolls you*
Heh nothin personal

how is it possible to be this ugly

Elkins is getting submitted, Hall is unironically the guy to beat Khalabeeb

*cartwheels so my leg is in the air while you're holding on and then slams you to the floor, KOing you*

maybe next time kiddo.

Khabib would just keep the fight standing and work Hall on the feet. There's only one man that can beat Khabib.

Hall fights a weight class lower and he doesn't care that much about fighting

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Cringe
Is that why Saul Rogers mogged him and he’s decisioned all non BJ Penn fighters?

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bisping was always a bum

Really wish they didn't bust Magny for cheating so I could take the picks.

What's next for Olivier Aubin Mercier?

i'm communicating with rose on instagram encouraging her to quit. she's not going to get any better at stopping those take downs and now her pay will drop below 100k a fight. it's time to ditch pat the zilch barry and become a waitress at applebees. no point in more head trauma and ptsd.

jessica eye is a good chance bet, huge return on investment

Jokes on you she'll put up a couple more post-its around the house and she'll be gravy

Taisumov in Abu Dhabi

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she tries so hard to not want to kill herself, you gotta admit that she does everything the therapist tell her to try

Wtf Brent Primus is 34? i thought he was a young up and comer

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spammer's LEGacy dare I say tarnished by janny forever?

*tap tap tap*

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why doesn't she just take a low dose of xanax. problem solved. pat can put it in her food that way she'll feel that she made a 100% recovery and then slowly taper her off. it's all in her mind

that's just how she is, you can't really fix it entirely, she'll always be like this

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Imagine Rose moving up to 135

I am a newfag to mma and find it confusing when legends like Randy Couture have so many losses on their records, not even post-prime but at the start and middle of their careers too... can someone explain pls

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Captain America

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steroids were less of an exact science back then

fighters like Randy Couture are usually legends for pioneering the sport rather than for actually being very good

I can see Elkins kicking him in the head while down and getting a dq

book it Dana

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who wins the simulation?

"You can't get slammed when you have the kimura"

Imagine advocating for brain damage.

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Then Andrade broke the grip and got the slam. Cruz was proven RIGHT and h8rs are in SHAMBLES!!

Imagine not

Punk wins the story

Why isn't this done more often?

rate this takedown

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>Natty women are way too boring
No they're not. Natty women are too fucking based.

>Andrade's wife so god damn ugly
She was once cute ya know but yeah she's pretty ugly.

Not enough skilled people to pull it off

punk

dare I say it? I dare not

Bro, broo how good is the calmedy store right now though?

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Do you remember schoolkids taking your Digestives money? It would be like that only worse.

Why aren't YOU in the UFC yet, /heem/?

0/10 Andrade would kill both of these ladies

They call backsing the sweet science by cohnawl's gonna turn it into an art class my man, it's called mixed martial artls for a reason, them old backsing chicken heads are gonna be surprised at the weird mma angles

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JDS at HW would heem Jon. Height, reach, excellent boxing technique, a fucking chin and experience fighting men that are about Jons size would mitigate pretty much all the advantages that puts Jon head and shoulders above everybody in LHW right now. Don't even >> me about this shit.

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youtube.com/watch?v=AkwJwXSmyRY

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>WMMA1.webm
I think a folder dump is in order

People used to do this with Gooby.

this

Bisping is a decent brawler and has good heart/ chin, but he is lackluster as an MMA fighter

At least Bisping went out on his shield

>tfw remembered the angles meme

fuck its been almost 2 years its definitely tough man

i wish Andrade would just slam me down desu

DAWG you smell thoz fajitas, b? sizzling like ssssssss

*whips head around*

HOMEBOY OVA HERE B DA MAN OF DA OUR ORDRIN THERZ

*tiptoes with arms extended and dopey fuckface look*

I mean whater we doing with our lives maaahnnn

you take that back you son of a bitch

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anyone else dare say it? I don't

this, i respect his hustle tho

I miss DJ

Jorge Rivera already expressed my feelings in the form of a song

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just kill yourself already my man
don't let your miserable existence bring others down

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CANT
BRING
ME
DOWN

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>DJ leaves the UFC
>Still can't fight Gooch
reeee

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More like most fighters are too skilled to let this happen

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this
>ducks Yoel and the trilogy fight with Rockhold after talking mad shit about both of them

This is true. Plus since Jon's long layoff he only beat a Gus who was coming over an even longer layoff and he decisioned smiff. People are acting like the dude who couldn't KO smiff would run through heavyweight, even Jon admits he doesn't want to fight at HW.

>no hand grip
>doesn't follow through with forward momentum
>ends up falling on ass in opposite direction of opponent
>fails on weak attempt at ankle grip

1/10

youtube.com/watch?v=Av9Sop3bHT0
It's out.

Love how Ronda is going with the mom angle to get out of her failing career.

Max is so annoying to watch. He just eats punches like this because he's bigger than everyone he fights and the only offense he has is like three different punches. He's the definition of a cutbabby.

>big guys have strong chins
See Overeem and half the HW division

I like how Max is a cutbabby who completely relies on his chin and he's hyped as a P4P guy.

Andrade sheems Shevchenko and Nunes to become the unified women's champ.

Overeem fights other dudes his size. Max fights people he has like 5 inches on minimum. His next fight is Frankie Edgar.

Amanda is literally a giant in front of Jessica

Michael "No dad" Venom Page

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>he actually thinks Max's chin would hold up at HW

that's not what i was saying

I was totally convinced she'd be pregnant a month after the Nunes fight

Based MVP finna rebound after this loss and heem his way through the entire Bellator woodleyweight division.

Spotted the chinlets

you can't really be a chinlet for being ko'd by fucking Ngannou can you? every HW has the obligation to have serious KO power

Cant believe i fell for the Max meme.

Wow need to go and rewatch this fight. Jose was landing at will.

heavyweights chins dont hold up because they're fighting heavyweights. your suggestion that heavyweights dont have strong chins in relation to smaller fighters is unfounded.

has coral commented on this yet?

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ngannou is unironically a based righteous and virtuous man

max was never good

>tfw schaub trying and failing to reverse cuck after having to raise his sons son
JUS SOLD OUT BAWSTIN AND THIS DUDES LIKE BRO YOU LOSE TO ANDRE ALOVSKI IN ...2000 SIX!

heard schaub on the rich eisen show this morning dropping KNOWLEDGE about future nba star "zion williams", what general CANT heem(schaub) conquer?

except for Hunt, Struve, Nelson et al.
he can by getting ko'd by bigfoot silva
then how come the higher weight classes go, the more KOs there are? because they fight people in their division?

Cans
What can I say about them?
The discarded, the forgotten, the laughed at, the spat at, no chance, the manlets, the lanklets, the genetically cursed.
Laughed about in public, private and digital forums worldwide, a constant source of amusement, filling the coffers of betting agencies at the expense of permanent brain injuries and the mental pressure of knowing the sport you chose to make a life around was one you weren't destined to conquer.
Why bother?
Because cans are what makes the UFC and mma.
For every champion that rises, you can be sure his arsenal has been fine tuned via the sacrificial lemming like onslaught of the can. Might be one thing the champion has learnt, might be confidence from another crushed can, might be a one up in the win column propelling said champion into contender status.
The can does not shy away, the can knows his place and the can is the engine room of mma, grinding day in and out, knowing full well he will never be champion but continuing because he loves it, ready to pass on another win for the next up and comer, ready to strengthen the up and comers mental fortitude, to show him yes he does belong here.
It's all business at the top end and if champions are the white collar workers then the can is the blue collar worker, keeping the economy of the UFC and other professional mma organisations alive.
The can loves being a can, he's a fighter, a battler, a teacher and a source of endless entertainment.
So here's to you cans..the jester, the blue collar worker.
The underdog
The can.

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It is rumoired Ngannou takes so much roids that he outright refuses to roll on the mats due to soreness. It has been hinted at many times but there have never been any outright accusations.

What the fuck I didn't know roids gave you a paper mache body.

I believe the only man to have any success as a TRUE natty HW has been Brendan Shaub. Everyone else is roided up to the gills.

Oh a hunnit persent

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"Whilst natural nutrients found intest boosterscan alleviate muscle aches and soreness by balancing out nutrient deficiencies and optimizing hormones safely, anabolic steroids (as well as some prescribed steroid medications) can have the opposite effect on aches and pains.

Because anabolic steroids cause rapid muscle gain, they can have a negative effect on your ligament and tendon strength. This is simply because the strength and size of the muscle begins to dominate its connective tissue and as such, your tendons can’t keep your muscles attached to the bone properly.

And that’s even without factoring in the pain from regularly injecting into your body. Sites can become painful, swollen and infected if you are not careful.

Not only are you at an increase risk of capsule tear or damage during a steroid cycle, you’re much more likely to suffer from intermittent cramps and aches too. The chances that you’ll suffer bone pain also increase dramatically as well.

One such theory as to why this might occur is hypercalcemia – a higher than normal concentration of calcium in your blood.

One case suggested that hypercalcemia caused by anabolic steroids can cause fatigue, musculoskeletal pain and weakness [6] and it was even suggested that the pain caused by anabolic steroids may be the reason why so many bodybuilders are choosing to take opiate analgesic medication."
Ripped word for word from some site advertising "testfuel" or whatever, I can dig into some more accredited sites if asked, but this explanation seems reasonable enough.
I have never done steroids so I wouldn't know for aure.

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Early stoppage!!

i hate muslims

based

Are you serious right now? It's because higher weight class fighters carry more KO power...

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lmfao KLB was such a fucking can, is this faggot still in the UFC?

Hows your fast going lads?

i'm only fast when i'm running from the police

Damn. I thought steroids made you heal faster so you could work out more. I didn't know they altered how your muscles are. I really don't know about roids at all.

whats the muzzie scene like in Brazil?
Kind of the (true) mecca of catholics with the statue of JC staunching Rio

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Here
Everyone
Enjoys
Muslims

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>escape shithole
>sit in free country shitting on people who saved you while singing praises of country you escaped because its shit
what would one call this?

Water you talm bout bee?

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Lol there is an entire forum about steroids where everybody is bitching about their tendons snapping.

steroidology.com/forum/anabolic-steroid-forum/143212-increase-skeletal-muscle-collagen-synthesis-certain-aas.html

He was winning the fight until that point.

I keep hearing Greg Hardy get's opportunities because he's a draw, but WHY is he a draw? He's not especially charismatic, and people caring about an individual football player who isn't a quarterback is like having a favorite ant. What has he done other than beat his wife to make him famous enough for UFC to give him this special treatment?

>he was winning until he lost

imagine being managed by an actual terrorist

we don't have real muslims here, at least i never saw one and don't know of anyone that has ever saw one, the only muslims that we have are like 5 hue tryhard faggots that don't eat pork and can't really grow a proper beard

Heeminder this is an anti muslim general

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>when he sold out boston but theres a h8r

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>MUH SPORT
>MUH ESPN
>MUH ATHOLETES

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Ryan Hall is going to get beat up. He had his hands full with Artem, keep in mind.

Hall is literally unheemable.

>dad cerone XDD

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Dana thinks he has star potential because Dana is silly sometimes.

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It's not so much that he is a draw, it's that he could be for someone else. I don't think they really want to deal with his baggage

i don't even think he's a draw, dude doesn't even have 40k followers on instagram lol

I hope Hall wins because I like him, I just don't see anybody with a pulse falling for his game. In the UFC, he's beaten two absolute dinosaurs and Artem. I think people are getting overly excited by his flash moves.

I understand he's a great fighter and is absurdly good at jiu jitsu. I hear people that trained with him say some crazy things about how good Ryan Hall is, even vastly better than you'd expect him to be. I hope he wins, but I ain't seeing it B.

Danaher's guys seem to have a bit of a hate-boner for him, not sure what all that is about.

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>A fighter from a higher weight class has a good chance to beat a fighter from a lower weight class
Thanks for the insight, brainiac.

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The hooknosed instigator and other MMA news commentators/news sources talk about him every time he fights. That's more than you can say about nearly any other prospect.

My sister is irl friends with Julie Kedzie, AMA

I don’t believe this for a minute. Brendan is fer sure on the mount rawlshmore of loyal husbands

post a picture of your sister

peachy tbqh

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How about no

have you ever had sexual thoughts about your sister?

No as a well-adjusted man the mere thought of incest is repulsive to me

pulsing with seethe

ask her to do a heem AMA

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How do people in Invicta feel about having their roster raided 57 times

If I can get her to be my gf I will

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"Raging Erection" Iaquita is a little bitch who couldn't appreciate the smell of Dad Cerrones feet.

>Dad Cerrone
cringe and soipilled

Literal cheating cutbaby would absolutly break down into a nervous wreck when fighting people his stature, he already feels the need to use PEDs against people he has already beaten lol

for what purpose?

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jesus he lost to Edgar 3 fucking times

the one they all sleep on

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Ortega v Hall would be good for both of em

I hate khabib so fucking much

Source?

one more run at the strap, bruther

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you, my fren, are a good man

honestly boys, i'm in

you're going to hate him even worse once he's gone 50-0

who is the one to take him down?

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Conor
Screencap this

And his name is Justin Gaycheese

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ufc 237 embedded episode 4

>this kills the Khalabeeb

Conor will never fight again. All he cares about is shillling his whiskey at this point

one fight, lucky punch; could have gone the other way, too

And he will shill his whiskey with one actual fight and a superfight with Askren

pic related

kebob memes ends soon

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jesus, who do we pull for both are eternal /ourguys/?

lol

Men 5'9 and up should be banned from 150

fucking Christ that ear

would

>superfight with Askren
1. Why would Askren fight Conor, he deserves better?
2. Conor and GSP would be a superfight, Askren is not any part of a superfight, at least at this point.

must fuck up the hearing, aside from looking like ass

you faggots talk shit here, but come in my dojo and get in my guard, you'll get fucking humbled, im warning you now

and bring your own gi ffs, coach doesnt have any spares left, last time some bum pissed his pants from a chokehold, new policy

at my gym its me and like 30 spics that don't speak english

hard sparring everyday, you last 5 minutes faggot

i don't think you're at my level bud... so if i were you i would keep my tongue inside my mouth

All memes aside does anyone actually give a fuck about Diaz vs. Pettis?

Because I'm finding it pretty hard to care. Nate is irrelevant without Conor. Pettis is a gatekeeper who made an entire career off of one memekick knockout.

is she still crazy?
what does she do for a living now?

it's definitely not the kind of fight that will make me hyped but it's a good fight for a main card

*ankle picks you*

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hold on im talkin brother

the fuck you just say to me?

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então vai te fuder vai tomar no teu cu meu

based Ferg poster

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Based

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I think I remember a JRE where Schaub said it fucked his hearing a little, messes up the accountants

I think its great that they let Arianny stand up there

Arianny is looking busted by the day

TFerg is the most dangerous retard on the planet.

esta maricon

Rose would have won if she walked out to this
youtube.com/watch?v=DKsBmiDuSC4

Post walkout
youtube.com/watch?v=HQZBaJAngH8

>lido shuffle
fucking based

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CUANDO ESTOY HABLANDO, NECESITA CALLATE

youtube.com/watch?v=502h2lATML4

couldn't agree more

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>tfw holding pads at training and old mate missed the pads hitting my elbow flush with a lazy left switch kick
feelsbadman, cant even apologize without feeling weird considering it was his fault.

Sucks bro. Reminds me of when a relatively new guy with powerful kicks but not as good technique missed the pads and hit me flush on the jaw twice in one session. I'm CTE'd for sure

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Jared Cannonier will heem fatselum soon

>tfw dont really know him but looked up his social media and he was burnt by a roastie wife, has sole custody of his kids and just started a new relationship with a wholesome looking woman who looks like shes into hiking and outdoors shit.
>tfw he drives trucks and wont be able to work
>tfw he wont be able to walk for 6 months
>tfw feel responsible for possibly ending the happiness he appears to have found with his new woman
he heemed himself pretty bad tbqh

reminder that Conor ducked tony cowboy pettis and nate because muh main events

Damn did the kick break his leg or something? The man has flushed himself

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MMA isn't like boxing. Title shots get thrown to guys who are popular/in good form currently. It doesn't matter if you used to be 9-7 if you win 5 in a row and people like you you'll get a shot at the champ. You don't often have two 20-0 guys with inflated records running into each other.

when is next rizin event?

foot.
Are you based tony poster?
You'd like me, I train everyday, follow a strict diet and am a bit of a machine.
Love your work brah

>youtube.com/watch?v=_F7INzRq-RU&t=210s
Why is Helwani such a little bitch lmao?

I am one of the many Tony posters but maybe the only Aussie one. That sucks for him, injuries are a b, i've spent my whole day on heem cause I fucked my rotator cuff and can't train today, right after healing from a bad shin splint. You seem similar to me except i'm working on getting my diet ready for an interclub match, but I also train near daily.
>tfw new qt French student literally called me a machine lastnight when all the other guys were thirsting for her.

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Jordan Burroughs

volkagodski

>some faggot in the comments said /ourjew/ looks like Nick Wright

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Wtf is a Holobaugh?

She's so fucking cute, bros

Wake up Cowboy

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That’d be a good fight. My autistic simulations have him fighting Brunson on a quick rebound fight though

does nate need money?

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who made the schub thread on Yea Forums?

what's even the point of posting here when there isn't a card

cya nerds

will tony vs cerone be the JUS BLEED of 2019?

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you can C deez nuts in your moms mouth

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youtu.be/cJLNKFiPQEA?t=50
>We gotta talk about how fucking sensational Rose Namajunas looked. I have never seen a fighter move so well in my life. It was incredible. I was actually sitting there watching her in awe

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oh my

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ESPN, we geeeet it

Holy shit Good Guy Jon Jones is fucking WEIRD

what has gotten into him?

twitter.com/btsportufc/status/1128292318614831104

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If i was a fighta id surgically sharpen my shins and elbows at some dodgy cosmetic joint overseas. Get some bone carved out here and there and id be rocking blades.

I dont think ufc could do anything to stop me really

>Daniel "Daniel Cormier" Cormier
>size advantage
this guy has lost his fuck'n nut

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For a second I thought Eddie said that because of the pic and got worried, but it makes sense Bisping would say that since he has CTE at least.

I like good guy Jon Jones because he works his haters even harder and they have to come up with elaborate schemes to say "he's not actually being nice it just seems that way."

Ryan Hall's fighting style is unbeatable.

Throws non-committal kicks to win by points. Much like Elias Theodorou in that regard, except Ryan is fine with being thrown off balance because falling to the ground is an advantage.
Approach to fight and he flops to the ground. Then uses his 20 black belts to butt scoot towards you. You can only retreat.
He cannot be damaged. He is already grounded.
If you don't engage him when he's on the ground the crowd will boo and you will look like a coward.
Used his autistic high IQ to spot these gaps in the MMA ruleset to exploit. He will define the meta.
Winning is impossible.

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I invented the Daniel "Daniel Cormier" Cormier meme and you're stealing my thunder.

*punches you in the face*
nothing personnel

calm your tits, i invented few memes that caught on, i won't jerk myself off when other people post it.

Please no.

scary thing is, an awkward style and he has barely committed to mma, if he stays away from becoming bankok ready, and sticks to his functional damage and defense as he improves he could be a real threat.

a naked leg kick is dangerous against hall because that means all your weight is on the back leg he can roll for.

still waiting for the imanari roll to upkick, to drop someone, because it lands hard when they pull away from his guard with their head down

She'll be tough for Valentina but Valentina can check kicks and fight backwards unlike Rose.

>this post
Yeck. Trite and contrived. Oblivious to nuance. Amateurish at best, demonstrating only a passing acquaintance with the foibles of this board.

he has all the right tools, we just have to see if he has the competitive spirit to get it right.

her game plan is to slam people and throw slow ass hay makers. she won't make 1 title defense

>Daniel "Daniel Cormier" Cormier

Good one!

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She will kill someone like Waterson, she also has underrated BJJ. She'll probably have more defenses than Rose.

this, Rose is just a bad matchup for her, she's going to literally kill Waterson if that fight happens

prime schaub would heem ngannou

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how much do you bench?

Waterson is a bum, PVZ too

426 for 2

So it seems

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Khabib is the GOAT. You will never not be mad about this fact

muslims are destined to lose.

Are you really Cambodian or proxy spammer?

who has he beaten bruz?
And why is he so scared of going up a class?
>seizures while cutting weight
literally shook

*enters thread*

barbozer? munster
yaquinta? mount rushmer
gooby? beast of a peach

halfelf de sanchez? straight killer bee

How is he better than Jon lmao and don't say "muh picos". Even GSP is still better than Khabib. Until Khabib fights Tony he'll never be in any serious goat talks. His best win is RDA years ago. He also hardly ever fights.

What he did to Aldo twice speaks for itself

Why are all the best heavyweights Asian or part Asian?
>sakiraba
>Corcop
>shaub
>miocic
>lewis

I actually don't think Rose was that much a bad matchup. Superior from a technical standpoint but Rose has a shit gastank when she has to go backwards, and she can't fight on the backfoot. Couple that in with her always getting outmuscled and hurt in the clinch I always called an Andrade TKO. Claudia would maul Rose.

*joins the discussion*

Both of them are made of glass, but at least T Sperg has heart. Lil Donny will quit on his feet.

Alvey wins the rematch

Why are all the best Asians heavyweights or part weight?
>bj penn
>D.C.
>schaub
>mir
>choi
>waterson
>cub
>Khabib

Baldo just got exposed by Volkanovski and now Max is fighting Edgar to avoid Volkanovski.

Yair smokes both of them they're duckers it's whatever bro

Didn't Yair duck Zabit? lol

You just going to stand there in the corner looking at the ground all day bruh?

>blacked raw when?

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yes

Why are all Asians fighters full Asian or part Asian?
>choi
>sakuraba
>waterson
>zabit
>liddell
>Chung lee
>bj penn

Aldo was injured in the first fight and the second was on extremely short notice, also Aldo hadn't recovered from the McGregor loss. So it's hard to say if he really "beat" Aldo.

thawlts?

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Post your fighter tributes

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Why are all the best fighters volcanos?
>volkanovski
>volkan

Genetics probably

Brenninshab straighdup out here c-c-c-crushinnit my bees

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bulgaria's always doing it the absolute cheeky monkey

Sage is making his debut on Friday.
Please watch.

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Andrade tapped
instagram.com/p/BxcVBywgIBp/

im gonna wave the flag thinking about Sage

Justify still visiting /heem/ regularly without reference to your crippling lonliness. I’ll wait.

Its where i visit my best friend derek

I just want to make sure I'm not misinterpreting this picture: Did Schaub's wife (Joanna) ask their son (Tiger) to pull down her pants so she could snapchat her asscheek?

“Sun” is a meant to be a pun on “son”. look into it.

would you put it past them at this point?

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kek wtf, that fucking oedipus complex that kid is going to get

thawlts?

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How accurate is this? What's missing?

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I come here for Brendan Schaub news, updates and hijinks.

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Talking about GoT for half the video

bloodyelbow.com/2019/5/14/18623072/ufc-237-mma-news-hospital-illness-alex-volkanovski-jose-aldo-fight

Filthy Brazilians tried to poison Volkanovski

UH VAI MORRER

Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is Brayilian Joojitsu Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Stand Up From The No Wrestling BJJ Can Nigga Just Walk Away Haha

nunes

>Another Friday ONE card
Just wish they'd stick to Saturdays. Nothing comfier than waking up early for coffee and heems. Hard to watch the Friday cards since I'm at work

they need to have their best asian fighters transition to ufc, beat some guys there, then transition back to one, or buy more ufc fighters, otherwise no one will care desu

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>and this is our sons room

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Is this merchandise available in Brendan Schaub?

>there are people ITT that thought Andrade wasn’t GADOOSHING rose one way or another
Like wuderyouevendoinhere?

NOOOOOO GET OUT

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no way a lanklet like tony could pull this off

what is jessica thinking, honestly. she could easily pull a chick in the upper 8's rather than this blob

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How does a fat warty uggo beefer like this bag them self a literal world champion athlete?

Clown world

*heems /heem/*

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/heem/ I need you to engage

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XD

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austin trout vs boston salmon is the fight to make

i invented this meme

khabib had seizures

it's a good meme

Prime Sakuraba vs Prime Anderson Silva who you guys got?

We talking the W or the story?

youtu.be/S5OUt53-6YM

head to head I mean. I think most people rank Silva ahead of Saku even if Sakuraba is special, but Sakuraba's style seemed all wrong for Silva.

youtu.be/cJLNKFiPQEA?t=50
>We gotta talk about how fucking sensational Rose Namajunas looked. I have never seen a fighter move so well in my life. It was incredible. I was actually sitting there watching her in awe

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Are we talking pride or ufc rules. It makes a huge difference.

Yeah I figured it depends on the rules. I assume Anderson in the octagon, and maybe Saku in Pride?

Rafael Dos Anjos vs. Kevin Lee
Vicente Luque vs. Derrick Krantz
Aspen Ladd vs. Sijara Eubanks
Antonio Carlos Junior vs. Ian Heinisch
Charles Oliveira vs. Nik Lentz
Davi Ramos vs. Austin Hubbard

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she was one of the very few female fighters who wasn't embarrassing to watch strike, but then she reinjured her spine and mind by based andrade. that's a shame.

Wait, so a guy employed by UFC is promoting UFC fighters?
No way

>RDA
>Luque
>Ladd
>Heinisch
>Oliveira
>Ramos

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Kevin lee
who the fok are the rest?

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Lee
Luque
Ladd
CarlosJr
Oliveira
Ramos

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Luque/Magny was a competitive fight. Shame Magny popped.

After the disaster of last PPV (main and Aldo fight aside), I'm not sure I'm ready to sit through and watch this one

>picking Lee
so 2017

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this retardofarto lesbokong is the most u can get when ur a roids cheater carnavalo Andrade

all weebs deserve this fate

Megan for tru heem warriors here

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BRB, gotta go shaub in the till.

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Lulling hard.

Pressure fighter with good wrestling. This is RdA's weakness, no? He might not be a Colby or an Usman, but I still think Lee has that pressure and wrestling power to do similar to what they did against RdA.
I've got Lee.

Lee is a turbo chinlet though

Lel.

I'm the guy who invented "Smoked Salmon" (the B-side to my "Toilet Till")

Andrade is the reason societies die these days. A chimpolesbokong with an iq of 12,5 full of Neanderthalian roidoso sklls justifies perfectly Hitlers masterplan about a twin town in Brazil cuz this is the only fuckin country in this world where even the flies are more intelligent than of human beings

>Hi user
>H-Hi. A-Are you here for the BJJ class?
>Yes - I'm the teacher. Shall we begin? It looks like it's just me and you.
>W-W..... S-Sure

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pay your debts

here we see two different types of autism in the wild

Mmmm smoked salmon sounds so yummy right now.

i would sub her and probably could break all of her bones, why the fuck would i take classes with her????

>Ooh.... user, didn't you see the sign outside?
>*points to sign*
>"No Brazilians"
>Sorry....

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die from braziloaids caranavalo bitch!! Soon ur country gonna venezualized and this will be the greatest day of all

hey swede goto black.com just like the others in ur country. mixin blonde and black all u have is a fuckin diarrea bitch

fish faced slant eyed zipperheads

Did you copy this from google translate

god asian girls are ugly

Lee
Luque
Ladd
Shoeface
Do Bronx
Ramos

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who pissed in your cheerios lithcuck

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based, fuck weebs

>most attractive Lithuanian fighter is Rose

thats not lithcuck, his turn on the local village computer was over and its another lithuanian now.

>MMA will now forever be pro athletes with good striking and acceptable grappling or vice versa
>ywn see another event where some 300 lbs sumo wrestler fights a 40 y/o karateka with an unironic moustache and nobody has a clue what's going to happen

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Did u boycott Alabama yet cuz all women in alabama now have the right to cut off the balls of any man that touches them.Merica man lol

RDA
Luque
Ladd
Antonio
Oliveira
Ramos

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youtube.com/watch?v=MVAYS8T_hyE
What are some fighters who have accomplished their lifelong dreams?

5 rounder buddeh

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How do I find a decent BJJ gym? I don't want to get heemed by some roided out sperg who doesn't know water he's doon.

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ANDRADE TAPPED HAHAHAHAHAHAH NOW UR FUCKIN CHIMPOLESBOKONG IS A ROIDS CHEATER AND A PAPER CHAMP TOO HAHAHAHAHAH

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Your Shadman waifu is flushed, get over it.

shove Mandrade tap in yo ass now bitch lol

>caring about wmma

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The decline continues. I guess Schaub was right all along. The prelims on ESPN were fourth in there time slot on Saturday behind NASCAR, NHL, and PBC boxing but the prelims did manage to beat college softball which aired on ESPN2

mmafighting.com/2019/5/15/18624008/ratings-report-ufc-237-does-lowest-pay-per-view-prelim-numbers-of-espn-era

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>she could easily pull a chick in the upper 8's
Fer sure, beautiful women daydream about roided dike sheboons all the time.

Dana on suicide watch

Her wife use to not look like that. She was chubby but damn she put on a lot of weight

You mean ESPN. Dana is getting guaranteed money regardless of what the ratings are and they aren't as reliant on PPV buys anymore either because of the deal they have with ESPN +

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>Pressure fighter with good wrestling. This is RdA's weakness, no?
No. RDA's weakness is a pressure fighter with an endless gastank. El Duckuy, Khabib, Usman, Colby - all of them have endless gastanks. Lee is a tanklet, the best he can hope for is pressure RDA for the first two rounds and then gas and lose the rest.

More like you are fucking gay. There's a reason uncle Adolf denoted Japanese as the honorary Aryans.

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ESPN is literally the best thing that has ever happened to the UFC

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Good point.
But what is RdA's gastank like? It's not Colby level.

I hope we see Brazilian Olivi again

>But what is RdA's gastank like?
Endless, he went 5 rounds with El Duckuy without showing signs of fatigue. His problem was that he couldn't get the fight to the ground since his takedowns and wrestling are not very good and on the feet he simply couldn't outland the duck whose striking output is probably the biggest in the UFC, so he lost a decision.

I think Lee just has to take him down and lay on him.

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Whater we even duin here

You have it backwards. We took away all of the women's rights in Alabama because we're not soibois.

championship level bunda

Are all Rose fans this delusional?

So that's why Joe hated on Schaub.

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it's very nice

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what did the camera man mean by this

Just like he took down and lay on Al? Lee can't wrestle for 5 rounds, RDA can grapple for 5 rounds straight. Lee is going to get beaten up on the feet and outgrappled once he gasses.

Canbibs toughest wrestling test was a jitz bitch who couldnt strike. Canbib couldnt take him down, got taken down by him, and got oustruck by him

Khabisexuals will unironically defend this

Lee is up 15 pounds, definitely has to help his cardio somewhat even if its slightly offset by another former lw moving up

which races were mixed in this case?

Lee is a turbo chinlet

Or he might come in bulkier than before and gas in a similar fashion since he now has more muscle than he carried at LW. We don't know what his gastank looks at 170, but gastank is not one of those things that you can dramatically improve overnight so I expect a similar level of suckitude.

You can tell it's a zoom edit because the logo moves

Turbo chinlet who wasn't KOd by Barbozo's spinning shit. Wish I was a "chinlet" like that.

He could, thats not usually what happens at first when someone moves up. He’s already very muscular and developed. He’s not putting on much more

We'll see, I'm sticking to my "Lee is a tanklet" narrative until he proves otherwise.

Tyrone woodley is a rap superstar now. Is there anything that GOAT champ cannot do?

>RDA left lightweight
>Kevin Lee left lightweight
>Can Diaz left lightweight
>Antony Penis left lightweight
Do any of these people think they'll have more success against the wrestlefuckers ruling there? I don't think Marty and Colby are more merciful than Khabib.

Jones himself admitted in this interview that DC is on the same level as him and basically no other guys can beat him. He also mentions he's not willing to go to heavyweight to fight DC because he knows DC would is too dangerous with that power edge at hw. Keep being ignorant little cuck fanboys though and ignore what the man said himself. That fight is not happening, and neither is daniel coming back down to lhw.
youtube.com/watch?v=TCTWce8jzJo

At this point I think the only 2 who have an actual chance is Santos or rockhold. Santos may just eat elbows all night but I think rockhold has a a bit of a size advantage and I believe they may be equal in reach and power and may even have a better chin at that weight class. If not he'll get starched by blacowicz and just stay in mid card hell.

Forr sure Lee has a prime Mark Hunt tier chin my guy

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imagine being KO'd by a BJJ guy

>Tfw DC still ducks and goes to the right

Ok, admitting someone is on the same level or has a power advantage doesn't mean he admitted he'd get beat, it'd just be a tougher fight. Fwi Jones would bulk and put in more muscle for heavyweight so it's not like itd be one sided Mr. Mma analyst.

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Early stoppage

Only Rockhold has a chance and that's because of his grappling but I still Jones will piece him up on the feet. Santos is going to get outclassed like Smith did.

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They have NO chance. I’d give Proper 12 and his self-heeming memeshit more of a chance with a flash KO

They just don't want to cut anymore because they realized the cutbabby meme is real.

He's literally only saying this because he beat DC twice easily and if everyone hypes up a third fight and Jon wins again he'll be the undisputed goat in most people's eyes. There are a lot of HWs who would give him trouble. Although, there aren't many LHWs who would give him trouble.

Rockhold is a turbo chinlet

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I'm sure you know more than jones himself, if jones says he's not going to hw to fight dc due to the disadvantage in power and how dangerous he is, You think jones doesn't know that he will bulk and gain more muscle? utterly retarded armchair specialist. Nowhere have i said jones would lose, jones is not willing to take the risk, that's what i said and confirmed in the interview.
>LEMME POST THIS FUNNY PIC AND PRETEND I'M RIGHT
keep jon's cock out of your mouth

>When you see DC's bulge in training

Why doesn't the ufc use arm length instead of wingspan?

I just think his boxing needed to improve, something he may have did after dumping aka.

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why dont they use dick length?

Yeah he definitely needs better boxing defense, but I think his chin may already be deleted unfortunately. He was supposed to be the guy running MW, but his shit boxing turned it into a meme division full of flushed fighters and cans.

Because they wear cups, which neutralizes and dick length advantage.

Name a bigger meme fight than Pettis va Nate at 170

Armchair analyst? Did you really just
>N-...no you!
Me?

Point out where I said he was going to do this? I never said the man would move up, I told you what would happen IF he did. Don't be a retard user, we're both armchair analysts unless your sitting in ESPN waiting for the commercial break to be over? I'm not a jones fan actually and if you have a problem with people posting photos on an image board then let me tell you your in the wrong place?

Im so fucking nervous for friday cant wait for schaubs special

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It may be a Whittaker situation. He was getting flushed in ww but moved up and fucked shit up

B
P
S

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Seriously why would Anthony “glass hands” pettis risk his last run to a title shot with such a nightmare matchup like Nate?

The Damage is too tough to fight my boy Ryan, he's going to get his shin bones snapped in half and have to retire, many such cases. Sad!

He hoping to get lucky, I do think Nate will drown him in his endurance. Pettis tends to crack under pressure and there's honestly no pressure on this Earth like nate.

>2019
>rap
lol

Go home boomer no one wants to listen to your 80’s rock

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All Pettis has to do is kick his legs

All Nate has to do is hit him in the chin.

Deathcore is where it's at

rap is dead in the year of 2019
deathcore is the worst genre of all metal right besides sludge

you have to go back.

this

Kevin Lee
Luque
Ladd
Heinisch
Oliveira
Ramos

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nova

What's the best metal genre? Thrash?

500

RDA
Luque
Ladd
Junior
Oliviera
Ramos

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I agree with this. Will be an easy fight for Pettis