/hoc/

shit

Based

you show me your breast and you can have one, just one.

Marcelle: Which one?

Albert: Any one.

Marcelle: No, which breast?

Albert: Oh, the left one. [Marcelle exposes her breast and grabs a canapé]

Marcelle: [with mouthful] Mmmm, mmmm.

You want to see the other one? [She pulls him into his room. It is a feast of exotic food.] Oh my, I never imagined... OK, one of these for a feel. [Albert kisses her breast]

Albert: Oh Marcelle, take it off. [The robe slips to the floor] How about this, a hand-job for a bowl of crudités?

Marcelle: Well... I don't know, Albert.

Albert: With a choice of dips and wine...

Marcelle: Done! [She pulls up his apron and starts manipulating his cock]

Albert: I've got to lick you all over. I must taste you. It's a professional thing.

Marcelle: Well I don't know... oh, seeing as its you. Those plates and some champagne. [They make love. Each new position gains Marcelle a new course. Finally, only the wedding cake is left.]

Albert: No, Marcelle. Not the cake...

Marcelle: I've got to have it. Bugger me, Albert! Bugger me for a wedding cake!

[Marcelle is finally sated. Albert masturbates into a pastry case as if he's piping icing. She pops it into her mouth.]

Marcelle: That was epic, nothing beats sex and food. Hey, you doing anything for dinner tomorrow? [Albert groans]

Reminder
youtu.be/GNbd3P8W1es

>it was 62-16-4

who?

>drafting QMJHL forwards

SCAAAAARRRRRRRRR

Pierre luc Dubois is elite

fuck knights
go niggers

stop knights
gently caress niggers

I am so fucking high from hitting my bong that’s says tsunami on it

clean your bong and then clean your room
t. your mom

My room is clean
And I just cleaned my bong

what if the canes had a 40 goal scoring winger? would they have a chance in this series?

when are we gonna revise this shit?

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start by adding a penulty box

Get rid of the fucking relocanes doodle to begin with

not sure if this shit meme is salvagable
rather just issue a new bingo card

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Actually we kinda do need a new bingo sheet for this offseason. Maybe add some kappo shit in there

Eichel isn't that good

Most of those are still accurate

which is why it wouldn't take much effort to fix it up

Jesus Christ
Ted from Akron back in 2017

youtube.com/watch?v=6hRkLp8NvOk

lads who do you have for the memorial cup?

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thought it was chael sonnen while skimming through the catalog, is hoc worth watching or is it for soibois?

>O'rags

Ted is Eternal

IVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG
FOR THE SUNSHINE OF MY
LOO-OOO-OOO-OVE

It’s your love ya simp

Hello I just dropped in to say good night for everyone! Good night lads

Goodnight Pegga

pornhat.com/video/4942/cum-in-my-temple/?ad_sub=321

i watch both hockey and heems, although i rarely ever watch regular season games in full. playoffs are amazing

Hal will have his day

Relocanes going down 3-0 tn can feel it in my plums

MARNER SIGNS FOR 12M AAV

fuck off

>2.5 bongs old
>not even 50 posts
is this /cric/?

Did I hear correectly? THE Kaapo Kaako to the Devils?

Is this me?

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Kaapo Kakko you hill billy shits

I like kaapo kakko finish hockey

>two great players in this next draft
>theyre going to your divisional rivals
Fuck the draft lottery

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>great players

Happened with hischier and Patrick too

>it’s real
Oh nonononono
>laffs

Taking my mom out to dinner tonight, try not to post any really great memes without me.

>Marchand is such a scumbag!

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Taco Bell or Arby’s?

bruins

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you mean she shit herself? the rat is ugly as fuck

>first game marred by dogshit calls (on both sides before you say anything)
>second game canes may as well not have even showed up with how little they tried

not gonna lie lads, I don't care if >we win or lose tonight I just want a good game for once.

Nico is actually good, but patrick is shitty. Kakko does look good, and so does hughes, even if he is a manlet and a bit more "shit". >rags unironically may have some future with kakko

needs
>blots
at the very least

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apple sauce

marchand is a good lad.

What's AAV?

average arse viscosity

average assholes vroomed

its like DVA only not as extreme

assholes as vacuums

african american vernacular

marchand is THE based retard

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For me it's boston swept in 7

>there have been nineteen seasons where a team with a losing record made it to the SCF (twelve in the pre-modern era)
>there have been three Stanley Cup champions with losing records (two in the pre-modern era)

why is this allowed? (I am counting OTLs as part of losses figures because a loss is a loss regardless of what you dress it up as).

fwiw:
>the Kangs are the only sub-.500 modern SC champions (40-27-15 [OTLs]), who beat the Devils (48-28-6) in six in the 2012 Final
>the "worst" SC champions ever are the 1938 Blackhawks (14-25-9 [ties]), who beat the >laffs (24-15-9) in 4 in a 5-game SCF

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Leave Boston to me.

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>14-25-9
yikes

Extremely hot take here lads (Warning: It may burn you if you touch it):

Brad Marchand does things that makes people angry

and makes me happy

>laffs

>gets exposed as a career backup

leave attendance to me

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angery

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lads

LADS

>rags

thinking about Raffi Torres, lads

association of alaskan vulcanologists

business idea: no more /hoc/

thinking about Raffi, lads
youtube.com/watch?v=dIiZ3vvZ78s

What do the letters in heem stand for

after thorough consideration, it's gonna be a 'no' from me, dawg

>literally peak hockey season
>this general is fucking dead
Thanks for the playoff matchups, gary.

l(h)urk mor(e) n(e)wfag(m)

This is what happens when one conference final is a pile of shit.

blame canada

>when handegg, apehoop, luckswing, and furpuck athletes in a city all get together to support each other’s playoff runs
Yurostupids will NEVER EVER know this feel

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Bettman is an american jew.

So who are the Canes going to concuss tonight in an attempt to get going? Johansson? Krug?

Reminder that Columbus will sign panarin to a 8 year 120 million dolar deal

canadian teams should have gotten out of round 1 we could be watching flames jets right now

twitter.com/stlouisblues/status/1128345913099988994?s=21

heem sleepy

i wonder who controls the league and rigs it for certain teams?

Homo Erotic Erogenous Massage

Why would they concuss the other team? If the caps series is anything to go by they need blood for the blood god to come back. My money's on Aho (though I'd prefer getting rid of Hamilton for a while because he drags them down so fucking badly)

They will roll over and die

Relocanes reported attendance tonight: 13,073
Absolutely PATHETIC

thats a big lad

OH NONONONONONONONOONONONONOONONNONONONONONONONONO

they took out Oshie and that won them the series. Someone on the Bruins is going hard into the boards in the first period. Maybe Debrusk.

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for me its going around Yea Forums calling everyone a based retard

Why don’t hockey teams just sign walruses as their goalers?

thats a female you shitlord

Watching the Simpsons always helps me do away with my crippling depression

did you just assume xir's gender!?

this except Whose Line

Please no, that would mortgage the entire future of the franchise

These are my favorite candies. They are dirt cheap, you can pick your flavor and they’re at every gas station. Even better, they’re always a surprise because you never know if they’re going to be as hard as a rock (later) or chewy off the rip (now). And if you’re lucky, a bit of the wrapper sticks to the candy so you even add dietary fiber.

Starburst cucks need not apply.

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Just waiting for the post season /hoc/ and I'll start posting here again.

>eating candy
Are you 10 years old?

My guess is Coyle

post leg

MCBOOMER GOING TO BRING THE SNAP

I hade niggers

Hockey

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Is there a game on?

My bong is clean as fuck

I got banned for posting strong duck. But really it was a piad effort by Mauri to sielence me. He know he should be fired Jets didn't win onpurpose. Blame the rest of the country
Also everybody stop posting fucking anime. Sports only. No gook cartoon bullshit. Not tonight

Mate shouldn't you still be banned then?

why do jets always lose on purpose? fucking stupid team

No it was 24 hours. Just a bop on the bill
This time it was for protest that French homo trying to ruin career of Patrik Laine swag

I mean maurice is a huge stinking faggot so I see your point

Thank you brother. God bless you

>Relocanes
OH NONONONONONONO

Can the relocanes come back from 2-0????

>randycanes

Dubs and relocanes reverse sweep.

Inb4 canes dont lose at home

Wow the canes suck How many power plays do they need to score a goal?

>b-b-b-b-b-but we have hamilton the pig...

when will bettpuck start

it started in the first but the relocanes are too shit to capitalize LMAO

Thinkan about a certian anime fan from Boston and his truck

hill billys btfo

gary is going to have walk it into the net himself at this point

why the fuck ain't there any hockey anime

they've got basketball anime, baseball anime, football anime, gay football anime, tennis anime, wrasslan anime, but no hockey anime?

>check gamethread
>they are talking about vegas again

There's some hockey manga.

Oh and just gonna say this a CGDCT anime about curling would be Goat. Curling is a sport for pure maidens.

because hockey isn't gay

Curling is a PASTIME for boomers, alcoholics, and girls that smell like cigarettes even though they don't smoke.
Somebody had to say it

t. Sean from Toronto

kcuf

sounds gay
would rather one about hockey. how am I supposed to waifu an anime girl if she doesn't get a game misconduct for heeming the shit out of the other school's captain when they bully the transfer student

Oh wow, does Sean have an opinion that doesn't fucking suck? News to me

>bombston subhumans and hill billys
>doesn't check the game thread
ah much better

that’s just fuck backwards you dumb backwards hick

because hockey isn’t gay

Hick bickys

Patrick laine threw the series so he could get back to playing fortnite
for me, it's jay bouwmeester

Patrik Laine is best goat of all time even though he spends all his tim playing fortnite. Part of fortnite why he's grown so multi dimensional this year. It's a fast paced game and very team work. That's why he's passing has got so much better as well. If he worked out hard like a faggot (real goat is hockey player hockey not excercisor) he'd be even more better but doesn't really have to lol. It just is sis

(citation needed)

Curling is for mother’s in their early 30s who have a meth addiction

Holy shit I was at work a full day and this thread is barely at 164 posts?

Awful. Moot was right in leaving.

FUCK I HATE NIGGERS
KILL THEM ALL

I have a good version of /hoc/ to make. I'm gonna make the Saturday afternoon thread lads

Canes are a fucking joke lel

Wasted what could've been a great ECF with Bos/Wash, bunch of roodypoos

bruins desu

Bluejackets are amazing

>refs do everything they can to help relocanes win
>they still shit the bed
OH NO NO NO NO

Get fucked randy
Sweep is happening

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digits and canes pull off the reverse sweep

I just gotta remind myself that with how this team was playing up until January, the fact that they even made it this far is a victory in its own way.

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vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6
>vocaroo.com/i/s0XR3JM32mI6

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>sunbelt ice makes the relocanes lose
Absolute pottery, hockey doesnt belong in the sunbelt.

worst ploffs in forever. not even a meme first round can redeem this.

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blues will win and it'll be absolutely based

SEETHING

>literally five (5) wide-open shots missed
>literally five plus (5+) power plays wasted
>literally will take four (4) games for the Bruins to win this series

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Hill billy gonna get BTFO Thursday lol imma laugh hard @ u

For me, its standing around with the work lads and a cuppa in-hand sharing the weekends events

>NEEEENO NEEEEDURRAAAYDER
Good lord north carolina is a shit smelling hovel.

Anyone else boiling alive with this spring weather and can't wait for winter?

>hill billys

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>victory in its own way.
I can see the at least we made it banner already

>acting humble now that you're getting blown the fuck out by the hockey gods
you faggots werent like this when you were celebrating regular season wins

damnit I really wish we were in the ECF.

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>were unironically gonna get swept
was a good season at least. will be cheering for bombston i guess because i dont want new cup winners

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fuck yes, i miss living on vancouver island where stays below 20 nine months of the year

No disrespect to the canes, I'm a firm believer that Boston sweeping them is a huge fluke and robs the Canes of truly accomplishing what their capable of. I've spent the last few days in pure disbelief and it just doesn't make sense to me. I've spent the entire regular season watching the Canes play great hockey it's just not fair.

If the Canes lose again I will face that the Bruins deserved the win, but I am just 100% sure it was a fluke and does a big disservice to the Canes and the NHL.

"Quad sweep"

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You fluked into the second round, you'd get absolutely raped. shut up weeb

>he can't stand the heat
grim

who will get to sweep boston then?

To the people coming into this sub and talking shit, how does it feel to be so sad and pathetic?

Redditfag confirmed

nobody theyre winning the cup

>cheering for bombston
literally the only teams I didn't want to win it all were them and the laffs, frankly I'm more upset that they're gonna go to the finals at this rate than I am that we aren't

Guess I'll root for the blues

>I've spent the entire regular season watching the Canes play great hockey it's just not fair.
lol what they were dogshit for like all of november, december and half of march

I see the leaf is still obsessed over a team that did well this season and still went further than tavares

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>it's an eastern team plays three rounds of pattycake and the west gets tired because they got pounded to shit by a team from the central episode

“They can’t beat us at home, we’re still the better team” turned into “well I’m still proud of our guys” real quick

>92772832
>sub
b8

Has Elliott ever played hockey?

the hurricanes got absolutely booty blasted the first two games...

ive been glad to just make the playoffs since the first round. maybe the other annoying fags have posted annoying shit though

isles are a fluke team, shit advanced stats, will be shit next year. also fans are weebshit scum

*skates past (You) and scores*

Well, it looks like we're out of gas. No shame in that.

Just don't let the very arrogant, rude, ugly and trashy Boston fans convince you to be ashamed of our team.

Imagine being a Pittsburgh Penguins fan right now

>get swept by a team that got swept by a team that is about to get swept

Lmao @ this owl hooting outside

The most annoying thing about all of this is that the narrative is gonna be that Boston completely dominated us.

But without Rask, this is easily a 5-2 game.

for real, west is consistently better but they play much harder hockey

Pretty average weather for where I am desu

its weird but then i just think about the five (5) Cups i've seen in my lifetime

METROPOLITAN DIVISON IS A FUCKING JOKE

I keep saying this IRL to people heckling my team. The pieces are here but they're young. No matter how the rest of this season goes, win or lose, we have years of good hockey to support. They're in the conference final, and so are the Checkers and Everblades. That's so much talented depth.

>pens get swept by islanders
>islanders get swept by canes
>canes getting swept by bruins
>bruins get swept by [spoiler]Blues

That means the penguins are exponentially shit. probably the worst in the league by my math.

In all seriousness, it's bummed me out.

Leafs losing to the Bruins saddened me, but the core still has potential to make noise over 10+ years.

But this stellar cast of actors, artists, designers, etc. working on Season 8 are getting the shaft from writing that is wildly different than earlier seasons and we'll never get a chance to see what a perfect final season would look like had with writers that actually gave a shit (instead of wanting to bounce to work on Star Wars).

Based '67 final redemption timeline

the penguins curse is going to take out the entire eastern conference
>pongs swept by islanders
>islanders swept by canes
>canes sweep by bwoons incoming
>bwoons going to get swept by ________

Either of these teams vs the NHL west Ballerinas, welcome to the meat grinder

so is the atlantic considering where everyone else is besides boston. Laffs are shite

>its only one person making fun if me i swear!
delusion + islelsweeb = otp

>sleeping on the shorks

I don't remember ever saying >we were the better team. Fuck, I had >us pegged to get swept in 5 by the Caps.

The only games of this entire playoff run I haven't enjoyed were game 5 against the caps and game 2 of the bruins (though I'd be lying if I said I was happy about some of those calls in game 1, I'm not so biased as to pretend the calls were anything but garbage on both ends that night.) Only times it really felt like Carolina wasn't even trying to play. Otherwise I've just been enjoying some good, fun playoff hockey man

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Thinking all that metro shit matters to the chad Atlantic

>relocanes
LEL

this

Postgame Williams, the defeat is in his eyes

Bruins arent losing

Atlantic is fucking ELITE

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real

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Heart breaker. Been a hockey fan long enough to know things are beyond bleak, Boston is getting the breaks, and Rask is unbeatable right now. Gonna take an absolute miracle at this point. I rarely ever say this kind of shit, but no matter who comes out of the west, I hope someone smears Marchand all over the glass. He makes Sean Avery look like a goddamn Lady Byng winner, the dude is everything I despise in a player.

That said; No matter the outcome, it has been a pleasure enjoying this journey with all of you.

We got one hell of a bright future here, folks. Onward and upward.

Punished Joe Thornton desu. If Ovie can do it than so can him.

pretty much any team from the west would win the east, how embarrassing

What the fuck, how did this trash bag team make it to the ecf? the canes are like last years kn*ghts but way worse

>acting humble now
embarassing and transparent.

What the fuck does swept in 5 mean?

They suck so bad the NHL makes them lose an additional game?

They dominated Mrazek. McElhinney put up a strong fight and really if it weren't for that second goal being a slippery shit who knows what woulda happened in OT.

>The Laffs were the Bruins biggest challenge
Leafs Nation on suicide watch.

>ecf
there's your answer.

>tonight's attendance in raleigh: 11250

This but unironically

Because it's the east, lad.

Its pretty much a leaf and a leaf only that does this shit. But i'll wait
yo same. Im glad that this team is growing and theres actually a foundation growing for once. we may have been swept by you, but I think this is a good step in the direction for both sides.

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Maybe he shouldn't have drawn three fucking penalties like a retarded newbie instead of the veteran captain.

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I think Tavares is better at handling media than Rielly. I love Rielly, I think he's a great Alternate Captain, but he's more emotive than Tavares which isn't always the best look for a Captain.

Rielly keeps his emotions in check all the time. He has really great locker room presence, and his interviews are spot on. His off ice support for LGBTQ rights, and positive leadership off ice is captain material. Consistent player, and has been through it all. No player aside from Gardiner and Kadri has been through it all than Rielly in this organization.

Meaning a team lucked thier way into winning one game but were outclassed thoroughly in the series.

>canescuck seething at MarCHAD
Should prolly look at their monkey captain before talking

no western team would make it through the Atlantic teams

>I hope someone smears Marchand all over the glass. He makes Sean Avery look like a goddamn Lady Byng winner
Based marCHAD putting plebbit into a seethe

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Does this fucking weeb think we take his hockey opinions seriously? This guy has never left his basement let alone lace em up

the only good weeb is a dead weeb

>dirtying weebshit with being an isles shitstain

WHO WAS THIS

at least I have bojangles

=not a sweep

ALL THESE S(O)Y REDDIT POSTS

its pretty sad really
wish he could find jesus

Based and redpilled

>Boston is getting the breaks

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I prefer weebs over leafs tbqh

i bet hes from florida, the fucking sunbelter

Das me

If Marchand makes you angry than it means he is doing his job perfectly.

>rags

Gilded

thats cause you are also a stinky weebshit

>we have a bright future here folks
reddit post but is there any worse cope in existence? the last time these hill billys have even seen the playoffs was ten years and they got swept in the ecf then too. teams fall apart all the fucking time. ask the snes.

84 fucking degrees today and already laying on the couch airing out my cock n taters with a fan, lads

They are, but good teams tend to make their own breaks and get the puck luck. Bruins know how to win the big games

Not literally it's a figure of speech.

Actually me tho

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can I collect my rent yet?

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Lol making a throwaway account to talk shit. How childish are you.

Me btw :)

there are people in this thread that haven't left their room today

lel

BASED neets

I have never heard anyone say that they were swept in 5. Maybe I'm wrong but I've never heard that figure of speech.

Are you retarded? Poo Jackets literally just got swept in 6

saying swept in 6 is the most retarded phrase i've heard

Huh. The retarded sunbelters are awfully quiet tonight. I wonder why?

>Sabres about to hire some literal who soccerfag for a head coach

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God damn that guy really BTFO'd user.

its an epic /hoc/ meme from someone trying too hard to save face

then you're a retard and a newfag lurk moar

sure, it should be in the mail with your janitorial income

Yeah.. Okay, have a nice summer.

hellllooooooo newfag

someone is mad!

>buffalel sport
they're cursed

H-h-hurric/a/ts!

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kys

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whomst?

Bring these back

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I'm giving you a night call to tell you how I feel I want to drive you through the night, down the hills I'm gonna tell you something you don't want to hear I'm gonna show you where it's dark, but have no fear There something inside you It's hard to explain They're talking about you boy But you're still the same There something inside you It's hard to explain They're talking about you boy But you're still the same I'm giving you a night call to tell you how I feel I want to drive you through the night, down the hills I'm gonna tell you something you don't want to hear I'm gonna show you where it's dark, but have no fear There something inside you It's hard to explain They're talking about you boy But you're still the same There something inside you It's hard to explain They're talking about you boy But you're still the same There something inside you (there's something inside you) It's hard to explain (it's hard to explain ) They're talking about you boy (they're talking about you boy) But you're still the same
>Go knights

newfaggot

>yfw you realize the >pooins get a 9-day break

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worked

Canes about to get swept and in embarrassing fashion.

relo____?

>Muh Metro
>Muh strong conference
>Muh cinderella story
I'm glad these stupid inbred hicks are going to get swept, fuck the Canes.
The Eastern conference is a fucking joke letting a team like this get this far.

CANES

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they made it to the ECF for the first time in a decade. I'd cut them some slack at least for making it that far with their goalies and defenseman

FUCK OFF RANDY
*clap clap clapclapclap*

mad at MarChad? unbecoming desu

Sharks: Jaime Lannister — "If there are gods, why is the world so full of pain and injustice?"

While Jaime is known to everyone in the realm as the kingslayer, he's never actually slain a king. While the Sharks are known to everyone in the league as Cup contenders, they've never actually won the Cup.

And with Erik Karlsson's nagging injury, San Jose may find itself playing with one hand tied behind its back.

Blues: Sansa Stark — "I'm a slow learner, it's true. But I learn."

Sansa's fortunes vastly improved after she rid herself of Joffrey, Littlefinger and Ramsay. Likewise, the Blues' fortunes improved ever since parting ways with coach Mike Yeo.

Bruins: The Hound — "If you can't protect yourself, die and get out of the way of those who can."

They're bullies. Zdeno Chara is absolutely the NHL's Hound. And they've always been a thorn in the side of the Toronto Maple Leafs.

Hurricanes: Euron Greyjoy — "I don't mock the drowned God — I am the drowned God."

Before storm surges and playoff aspirations, the Hurricanes were merely a bad team nobody talked about. Then they raged onto the scene, ready to make noise. Euron Greyjoy's journey is much the same, having not been introduced until Season 6, but as the captain of a naval fleet, he's wreaked havoc since entering the fray. Everyone here is just a bunch of jerks.

senators made the ecf for the first time in a decade two seasons ago
look at them now

hmm weird, but their playoffs games are full? are you implying those fans came out of nowhere as if they were, dare i say it, bandwagoning?

KILL YOURSELF

the canes aren't going to be retarded like the sens did with their players, and they do have a farm system unlike the snes. I could see some good longterm success with aho and foegele and svetch, but that depends on goaltending. Also haydn fleury really needs to develop

arena full of opposing teams fans since its cheaper to fly, rent a hotel and get ice row seats in raleigh than nosebleeds in bombston, washington or jew york

we're gonna need bigger rake

Cringe and bluepilled

>the canes aren't going to be retarded like the sens did with their players
is this a joke?
the canes are already MORE retarded than the sens are with their players

the sens at least tried to fucking pay guys like karlsson, meanwhile the relocanes let skinner walk for FREE
>I could see some good longterm success with aho and foegele and svetch
too bad dundon cant afford to pay them

rounds 1 and 2 were good. round 3 is just kinda shit now

shaving my playoff beard now lads

This is a talk for offseason and moves. Who knows what they do. They might as well implode at the moment and rebuild once more come july 1st

imagine being at the cap floor and thinking >your team is gonna pay the your star rookie the money he asks for/deserves

skinner wanted to leave

East is a blowout but West has potential

Can't wait for the Sharks or Blues to sweep the series in 7

may as well be the offseason for the relocanes
stop pretending like making the ecf was an accomplishment
cause dundon REFUSED to pay him
why would anyone want to stay in that shithole

>Weakest western conference in years has provided the most entertaining playoffs in years

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Imagine typing out your bit and it doesn't even land 10 per cent

kind of, but i'm not too excited about it. doesn't matter if the blues or shorks make the finals, the script is pretty much set for one of these teams to shork in the finals

>the canes aren't going to be retarded
>traded future superstar cliff pu

we need a western conference final of the canucks vs one of the alberta teams, it would draw DIMES

I don’t like this Crosby fellow, rubs my jibs the wrong way.

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Plus potential for another Vancouver riot when the CanCucks lose

the west is rigged so who gives a fuck

This is probably the worst redditpost that's been on here.

idk >my team didn't even make the playoff so im just here for the memes

Canucks have never lost in the WCF :)

It's literally straight from CBC, and it doesn't feature the gifs or the other 12 playoff teams. You *paid* to read that post

Proud of those conference victories huh?

I want my money back

>Based Marchand made a pig cry

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Best in the West three time champs

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Blooz is hoc team

The mighty Chad West is tied up in an evenly-matched series while the meek virgin east is too timid to provide entertainment.

>spending the time to make an instagram account just to reply to a pig

>Hamilton, you said after the third game of this series there’s no panic in the room. What can you say about how your group handled the next three games and ultimately advancing to the conference final?
Oink
>You know, Tukka Rask was saying this core isn’t getting any younger. What do you make of the opportunity that lies ahead of you?
Oink
>So, I see where this is going here. I’ll ask you one more about your line, they got back together. You had said the chances over there were just starting to bear in these last few games. What kind of zone are you three in?
Oink

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>taking a picture of yourself

how many dumb gimmicks does one team need

For what it's worth, and it should be quite a bit since I've been sober since Sunday, I hate pigs almost as much as I hate dogs

>omegalul

>hates dogs
found the redditor

It’s not me tho

Going to start drinking bourbon lads

Fucking alcoholic loser

I hate all domestic animals aside from small woodland creatures and farm animals.

Yeah so

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mama's not proud

who cares hill billy

>loves dogs
Found the redditor. Man's best friend? No one's best friend. Smell like shit. Shedding. More crying than barking. Always with the slobbering, the shitting, the snout in the balls. Stupid as fuck playing with rocks.
Anti-freeze every last fucking one of them.

kind of a boring game desu, still glad we squeaked another out. guess they arent playing that petey pablo song any time soon

Hillbilly is one word, city slicker

imagine willfully living in a desert shanty

I’m aware. I’d rather disappoint her with drinking than disappoint her by being a gay animefag

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Ow the edge of a try hard 12 year old

t. hill billy retard

Shut the fuck up you maple sucking queer

t. casual hill billy

nobody likes you

dudes who forced the randy and hill billy memes must be howling right now

The only good posters in /hoc/ are me, Hal and Will

2nded

While we're on things I don't give a fuck about: indians. I don't give a fuck about residential schools. You got a haircut and a free nun fetish. Now you're bitching that you gotta hire a lawyer (WITHOUT RETAINER, THEYLL TAKE MONEY AFTER YOURE PAID OUT) and they'll get you 6 figures out of the deal?!? That doesn't make up for the 2 school years you didn't see your parents? No. That's your cop out for being alcoholics. That's your cop out for raising meth heads that resent you for beating the shit out of them.
Fuck outta here.

>WE R LEEGUN 2EDGY 4MAINSTREEM EPIC XD

>Hal
that guy from Halifax who can't spell consistency?

just took my pants off and go into bed lads

>consistantsy

Yeah he’s a good lad

>laffs

i think i'm going to start eating cereal again

>go on a 19 game point streak before playoffs
>universe is still surprised that broons are going to win

No one from the east coast can spell and that's why they're all unemployable

for me it's cheerios with a bit of brown sugar sprinkled on top

I mean once they beat the laffs it's been cruise control to the finals

>consistastny

Get some Cinnamon Toast Crunch

yeah i was thinking cheerios, or maybe some meme sports cereal since i want the carbs now that i'm liftan

you just know marchad is winning it for based hal

Fat fucking retard.
If you're an adult and you eat cereal it should either be Red River (plain) or steel cut (cinnamon and raisins optional)

watching smackdown

literally no one is surprised that the only good team left, after the other 8 good teams were memed out of the playoffs in the first round, is going to win the cup.

Day 5 of no fap and I’m seeing titties on my bathroom tiles

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for me, it's raisin bran

>no fap
enjoy your dick bleeding

I find Abraham Lincoln in my shower tile every morning

gonna hit the hay, lads. Long day but im just glad i didnt put up an obscene amount of shots, got multiple powerplays, had two goals against called back, and still lost 2-1

just jack it faggot someday your dick won't even work and you'll think of all the loads you didn't bust because of some meme.

Why would you watch a pretaped go home show, hours after it originally aired. Just rope you retarded son of a bitch

unironically, me too lad

I’m going to call Finlabd the N word first thing in the morning when he wakes up. Anyone with me?

have sex

What's the n word

Nice

For me it's GCW as my favorite promotion and Hana Kimura as my favorite wrestler

my grandpa died last week and I've not felt like it so i figured id see how long i can go

Neeno Neeederryder

started eating oats mixed with fruits, it does wonders for your digestive system lads. my tavares' are no longer backed up

Hanafags OUT

I can't tell you guys what's going on. But it's fucking nutso. And finland plays no small part

*click*

you lads seen detective pikachu yet

>you now remember trying to enjoy mania on Yea Forums with the lads and getting shut down by pedomod

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Are you me?

watch gatoh move

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OMG YAAAAAASSSS! IT'S SOOOO COOL! WOW I WANT TO WATCH IT A FOURTH TIME! XD

nah but i wanted to take my mother to it for mothers day since avengers is 3 fucking hours long

Fag

-Posted from my switch

every am, oatmeal with dried fruit and cinnamon (no sugar). hate it, but its my attempt at eating at least a bit healthier

Might take my kid this weekend but I’m in no rush

/hoc/ always has and always will be an extension of /Stardom/

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are you k******?

To be honest, I haven't really even been watching these playoffs

I really like seeing the hill billys get close and then have the carpet pulled from under them. It's incredibly enjoyable.

me in the 3/4 sleeve shirt

Early rounds were highly entertaining and just about all of the good guys won, round 2 was perfect until the Teds crumbled and that series got boring. Only the WCF is worth watching desu

t. retarded hill billy

Fuck no

the hillbilly is right, it would've been far more entertaining if the teds didn't go full retard

>Babby Pengs signed a 10 year extension to the lease
Was worried I was going to lose local hockey for a while, lads.

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>relopengs
my sides

>1993
>1967
>2004
>2011

Burn in hell cocksucking fucking fucking losers. Eat shit. Laine Stanley Cup 2020

Fortnite zoomers can't win cups

In terms of an entertaining SCF what is the ideal matchup vs. the Bruins? (assuming Bruins don’t pull off one of the greatest chokes of all time)

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you lost to a fucking expansion team in 5 games patty and paul maurice thinks you’re trash

Oh did that go through? Was hoping they’d be kept in the state nice

It doesn’t matter bruins are winning no matter what.

reminder that bufooglien and wheeler are like 36 years old now. jest core is already falling apart before they even get in the process of resigning everyone

>lose the civil war
>get swept
when will hill billys learn

I don't want Joe to lose his last chance at a cup to the team that traded him, so Bloos

The jets are also an expansion team

Yeah, I was worried because I heard someone say they were on the fence about a one year lease about halfway through the season, guess it was just hearsay thankfully.

Get pucks deep lads, roll four lines.

i personally do NOT want to be the a fan of the team that overpays for tyler myers

Same but with Twinkell Marner

that’s like black on black crime

imagine

Reminder
>11.6
>11
>7

Want to see it but will wait till after cinemas. I really only see movies at the theatre if they're heavily based around visuals

imagine sitting in a theatre for 3 hours. fuck that, i could barely watch alita because my ass was starting to go numb

People on this site hurl alot of insults at "NPC's" but don't realize how blissful it really is. Nothing you say to me registers. Every day before I leave the office I have to leave myself a list of activities to do in the morning in case no one shows up. When I don't come here, hockey simply ceases to exist in my mind.

Reminder the cantpucks can’t even make the playoffs lmfao

KIPPSHIT BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

HOLY
FUCKING
SHIT

>nearly 30 million USD a year for 3 players who are still first round playoff losers
>still have to give Marner his pay raise
Laffs Nation on the verge of suicide

Do egg yolks break easier the older the eggs are? 3 mornings in a row I’ve broken one of the two yolks of my over-medium eggs. Very disappointing, but I will try harder tomorrow.

NOOOOOOO STOP MAKING FUN OF US ALREADY

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>spending over $17 on a single movie ticket

Reminder the Canuckleheads haven't won a playoff series since 2011

French Omelette is the only way I eat eggs desu

seriously, some of you guys are really mean

oh no no NO because marnerlet will fuck up the market it means the juest will overpay for laine too

lmao!!!

Flipping your eggs is for faggots. I like to make the heat max then put the egg in. I like the white crispy and burnt, and I like the yolk raw. Restaurants ALWAYS fuck this up. Cook them Pittsburgh. Yes. Just like the steak. which I'm sure you would also fuck up irredeemably

I don’t know how to make an omelet

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO we'd be in the playoffs already if juolevi wasn't such a big fat finnish BUST

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Bunch of cooklets in my /hoc/ baka

You gotta crack a few eggs

Simply resigning laine is a win. Anything under 10 AAV is a steal
It's stupid fucking hard and the ingredients are no different than a fritatta. Not that I even taste them. I go through probably 2 liters of Franks a month. My blood pressure is zonked

I never forgot..

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eating turns you gay

>10 AAV for budget ovie
hmmmm i think i'll pass

Laine isn't worth more than 4million aav at most.

>remember that time we went to the stanley cup final, lost, and then were shit after that?

if you don't scramble the omelette in the middle while it's being cooked you don't know SHIT about cooking omelettes

Plenty of cooking guides online fren

Laine > Ovi > Pasta > Kurri > Messier > Svech > Gretzky > Nalkin >>>>>>>>>> Crysbitch.
That's tea

It’s actually the opposite

Cringe and Sampilled

The NHL is so rigged it isn’t even funny.

Ok, now the unironic list

don't worry i'll make sure to boo bettman at the draft so he'll unrig everything

eggs are the most reddit brekky food

Laine > Ovi > Pasta. then I don't give a fuck about the rest

Make sure to shout some /hoc/ meme so we know it's you

not looking forward to dying one day lads

Death can't come soon enough

You can watch your dog run away,
and out here it can take 3 days
I've heard every joke
I've heard every word you say

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who did sam cheer for before the justs?

Getting swept in the conference final basically means you were a fluke team. Simple as.

don't worry lad, you won't see it coming

>that moment when even if your life is good you are going to die anyway

kek. normies btfo

I am. Aren’t you curious what happens? No one ever finds out til they die

When I was like 14 they had a week long corner gas marathon over Christmas holidays but since it's Canadian there's only like 20 fuckin episodes so id mentally tune out. I basically spent a week couped up drinking vodka singing the shitty corner gas theme to whoever would pick up the phone.
Don't ever post it here again
Caps. Always caps. Except in Chel 04. Id use the Avs

yeah right you liar

i was a fan of the cantpucks before winnipeg got their team back

FUCK alborta

Thinking bout suicide lads

I was a sabres fan before I was a knights fan

let us know what happens after

Most people were fans of another Canadian team (minus Sens) or the Pittsburgh Crosby's or the Chicago Toews. Not me. I've been a contrarion my entire life

Will do but what if its nothing

500

...

I'm pretty sure you're right

Tfw wake up to see I won my Boston bet

gotchu mn

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BASED AS FUCK POST

laughing hard at the hillb illy

Shall do everything in my power to help bring that natty to /hoc/.