/heem/ GOAT edition

Why WOULDN'T you, tho? You really need to examine your life choice, bro.

Aldo wins the rematch (against Conor)
Gaethje wins the rematch (against Eddie)
Conor wins all of the rematches

Rockhold wins the rematch (against Bisping and Vitor)

What face exercises can I do to get a chin like Ben?

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hands free push ups, use your bottom jaw to lift your whole fucking fat piece of shit body off the ground over and over

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Nervous about starting my new job.

Heem the biggest person there, assert your dominance

it's not worth it, shoulda stuck with your last job

someone post the elias off the cage low kick webm

>go to Yea Forums to see if there are any threads on Beat the Streets
>nothing
What's the fucking point of "alternative sports and WRESTLING" board if they don't actually talk about wrestling?

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It's honestly insane how much better the average boxer is than the average MMA fighter, let alone comparing the cream of the crop.
Deontay Wilder could roll off the couch, strap on 4 ounce gloves, and beat Jon Jones into a living death in MMA in under a rounds, and in boxing it wouldn't even last a minute.
Jon Jones looks like a spastic autismite on stilts compared to Wilder, I cannot emphasise this enough. Jon is the undisputed GOAT of MMA and yet if he applied himself to a real sport like boxing he wouldn't even get beyond the regional level.
That's how astrologically huge the difference in skillset is between MMA and boxing.
>but the takedown! wrestling!
Are you serious? Are you serious? Be serious. These are world class athletes, they aren't just going to flop onto their backs like some drunk MMA retard. A boxer needs to be almost knocked clean out before he even considers falling from his feet, and trust me some drooling MMA dopenut trying to clobber a boxer with wild telegraphed meathooks isn't gonna even touch a boxer's guard let alone get through it.

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How does a boxer defend against kicks and takedowns? What happens if a fighter gets inside and starts to clinch. No referee is there to break up a clinch

why hasnt goobs tweeted yet ?

based

Surgery

Quality pasta

Pasta but didn't some dogshit Irish mma can go 6 rounds with the best boxer and land more strikes on him than anybody else ever?

How badly is this steaming pile of shit going to flop? Will Schaub be able to handle the criticism?

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i'll feint a right hand and read ur gay boxing torso flailing and then do it again and headkick u into orbit buddy

>spams obliques on wilder's skinny legs
>takes him down
>full mount
>gnp

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>starting new job on tuesday
>won't be able to watch askren get embarrassed
going to miss my neet existence

only chance wilder has (which is a pretty good chance if we're being real) is landing. wilder has a nuke strapped to his right hand. blessed by god. he would heem ngannou stiff within 10 seconds

God awful z level bait that got two replies an hour ago somehow gets twenty this thread. Astounding

10 rounds actually
but floyd came out of retirement and still finished him

>but the takedown! wrestling!
Are you serious? Are you serious? Be serious. Even a 50 year old boxer can nullify any wrestling and takedown advantage with one, well timed right hand.

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i think you'd be surprised

>Implying a boxer would ever be that flat footed
Wilder in round 15 would have more movement than that.

James Toney did a great job of doing that in his fight against Cotoure

haha boxing is the greatest fighting system of all time haha i love having fully calcified arthritic hands and cte by 25

Askren would heem canelo and make him his wife

Hey I start my new job that day as well.

huh, i'm starting tomorrow ,,,,

Wilder is a glass jawed, pillow fisted windmiller.

what are you guys doing. i'm starting in a meat processing plant.
>getting paid to heem cows

i drive

youtube.com/watch?v=Doe4PhCGm9g

>meat processing plant
That sounds depressing.

Does Elias get cut?

elias= HEEM

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Biostewie

Lmao @ all the khabisexuals that hyped al as a munster for sure that would decimate cowboy

Which begs the question just how much of a can is Kevin Lee?

Frame is literally everything

One teenage Japanese virgin vagina please

how good were the heems last night lads? just got out of the woods.

Staphless focused fairly judged Kevin Lee is unbeatable

not good stew

Be careful what you wish for

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that's surprisingly easy to do

*retires*
*unretires*
*does nothing*

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*bank account gets fatter than when he fought*

I didn't watch the fights yesterday, can someone give me a rundown? must watch fights, snoozers, webms? did the GOAT win? help me out here

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elias was robbed because the crowd was booing
quinta exposed as a can
cowboy becoming a money maker

shit fights, judges still retarded, Elias went pretty meme and main event was good

The feminist bum was exposed as complete trash and Firas' corral got dogwalked
i.4cdn.org/wsg/1557027204527.webm

How come RIZIN is focused on fights between dwarfs and midgets? Where are all the heavyweights?

>shadow box
>50 kicks
lmao he's really embraced the meme fully

>he's so rich though!
and? are you a fight fan or not

I am 21, have about 2 months of boxing experience, if I wanted to go pro in MMA what path would I take? I was thinking of pairing kickboxing and MMA and training in all my free time to get good. I would be fighting at heavyweight or light heavyweight

If you're only 21, enroll in college and learn to wrestle. Wrestling/boxing is the best possible combo

>heavyweight or light heavyweight

Fight light heavyweight if you can at all make it. Trust me, you don't want to be in there with some 280lb monster.

I am about to graduate college where I was in the Boxing club. I was considering joining an MMA gym and learning wrestling
There are many heavyweights who are barely over 205

If Khabib ends his career at 30-0 by beating Poirier, Ferguson and Gaethje, is he a top 10 fighter ever?

yes but he wont

>cowboy becoming a money maker
>MMA
>Real sport

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>There are many heavyweights who are barely over 205
Name one

it's very possible he does, user. None of those guys can match his overall wrestling game.

hes been dodging for the longest time
he will retire before fighting him

>There are many heavyweights who are barely over 205

And there are many that are over 250, I train with two of them and I'm not even at a big gym. If you are on the edge of making 205, I would try as hard as possible to make it.

Dodging whom? Tony? They've both dropped out twice. It's been a string of terrible luck. Let's not be emotional or shitpost.

Best Boxers would get crushed in PRIDE,BELLATOR or UFC, no chance against MMA fighters, who are much more complex and will always find a way to put you down.Boxer has only one option and even that only if he can actually find a spot to hit, which is much harder in MMA since fighters have very different movement compared to boxers.Its very higly unlikely a boxer can beat a MMA fighter by MMA rules.

>Jon is the undisputed GOAT of MMA

This itself 100% discqualified you. Doper Jones is not even on the list.Plus, only Heavyweights can be on the list you dummy.

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All good boxers need is a few months takedown defense, a blue belt level in jiu jitsu, and they would wreck anyone in the UFC.

But MMA is a broke nigga sport, they aren't going to bother until the pay is worth it.

MMA is growing while boxing is in decline.Watch in 10 years MMA fighters will be richer than pathetic boring boxers.

>boxing is in decline

This meme has been going on for a solid unironic 50 years. If anything, beaners taking over the US is going to give a nice boost to boxing numbers. The US is like half Mexican now, and they all love boxing.

>Its very higly unlikely a boxer can beat a MMA fighter by MMA rules.
See

>UFC Heavyweight Champion
>5'11" Manlet
>Boxing Lineal Heavyweight Champion
>6'9"

>MMA
>Real sport

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MMA only has become truly popular past 15 years out of which only last 5 MMA truly gained a traction and its growing worldwide like a fire.The thing is, MMA was very much refused by general public and even potential fighters at the beginning cause it had simply bad vibe among regular folk and bad organization.PRIDE made the breakthrough and ended after stupid decisions but you could see how huge potential MMA has. 40-80 thousand spectators and if it was not mostly a Japan thing, it would have been much much bigger.UFC has still tons to do to become as big and awesome as PRIDE was. But they are getting there.Also in Europe MMA is becoming absolutely HUGE.

MMA is not about height and never was. Thats why shorter dudes regularly beat taller dudes. Have you ever watched MMA ?? MMA is about skill and complexity and fighting intelligence, something that boxers have very little.

Rate my p4p top 10
1. Jones
2. DC
3. Max
4. Whittaker
5. Cejudo
6. Khabib
7. Usman
8. Aldo
9. Romero
10. Stipe

Elias highlights
archive.4plebs.org/sp/search/filename/brunson-theodorou webm/

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We saw Maywaether (supposedly the GOAT of box) vs. Conor McCregor (average MMA fighter) after only two months of boxing practice and it was an equal fight.What won for Mayweather was his experience in the LAST round nigga. So WTF are you talking about ?? Had Conor used all his skills he would have eaten Mayweather alive. You are delusional.

truly /ourguy/

>3. Cutbabby who just lost the moment he moved up against another former cutbabby
>6. One dimensional can crusher
>7. Generic wrestlefucker
>8. Le flushed excuse man
>9. Geriatric respiratory challenged bridesmaid
>10. Le flushed gravely voiced can crusher excuse man
Awful

Jones = Multiple Doper

READ THIS:

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Jon Jones is a cheat. He can NEVER be even on the list:

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Max needs to be a lot lower, durability and cardio. But he lacks defence, footwork etc

>34/41
>93%

Solid memes, but what about fr?
Settle down, they're all juicing.

Emelianenko 10
CroCop 8-9 (tested positive)
Stipe 8-9
Nogueira 8-9
DC 7-8
Only Heavyweights can be GOATS my dude. Sorry.

all the cupcakes my guy hundy pursent

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Honestly i think he has the capability to be consistently mobile and defensively responsible but genuinely trusts his chin and enjoys a good scrap. He's still a monster and could tear up LW if he puts on muscle.

>Settle down, they're all juicing.

No they are not all juicing, thats just you, coping with bad news ;)

Like he said, the last one tasted sour but it is what it is. He's a true champion even in defeat.

are you not counting women? I know wmma is a meme but Amanda has enough impressive wins at this point that I rate her

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>he’s theoretically the best

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I see you cant handle facts.

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So now you’re just rating how much of a crush you have on them?

Garbrandt vs Cruz 2 is THE fight to make.

Has anyone ever have their name in giant fucking letters on stage in their first special? We're talmbout the future mound rushmore of calmedy here, b. Schaub, Rogan, Theo Von, and Callen.

I think putting on muscle will probably slow him down and mess with his volume output a bit. He's already a lot slower than a lot of fighters at 155. He needs to go back to featherweight.

That's not what I said nor implied, my friend. But he is the best at FW.
Yeah I didn't include women but she's a good shout for sure. Probably the WMMA GOAT.
No
Okay

Hmm interesting points. I'm not sure he's necessarily slower, but he always relied more on timing, accuracy, and unraveling and outlasting his opponent anyway. Yeah, I'd love to see him bolster his legacy at FW.

How does Max nearly die cutting to 145, but he's so much smaller than the guys at 155? Looking at his torso compared to Dustin's, it was clear who was the smaller man

That’s exactly what you implied. Because you followed up someone criticizing that with precisely that statement. How do you reconcile Poirier clearly being better than Max but not even cracking the top 10 but also having Max third?

He's not theoretically the best, he is one of the best even if he plays with fire more than basically every other champ.

He fought Max at a different weight class while having years for his body to adjust to it while Max just showed up with a smaller weight class.

You're free to put Dustin in your top 10. Don't be so whiny. He's a great fighter.

>all these turbo cazzies not realizing p4p is based purely on achievements

Skinny guys have less muscle, therefor less water weight to drain. That's why people always pretend skinny fighters cut too much, Cerrone is another example, at 170 they all said he looked too small, then the other day people were saying God Cerrone looks bad, he's killing himself to make 155, he needs to move up.

with a smaller weight cut*

>his attitude is P4P

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His attitude is definitely top class!

Too bad that doesn’t translate to his fighting

Khabib is scared to fight people his size

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To be fair, donald looked like shit at the weigh in

But skinny people are obviously going to look more drained, this is what started the Max Holloway being 200 pounds trend.

Sure it does. There's a reason he's always exciting. And that lends itself to him being a p4p talent and on the road to featherweight greatness.

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why u up so early Luke ?

>sure it does
Which is why he got his ass kicked by Dustin

Or do you think your meaningless platitudes and cocksucking have any value?

Holy shit shut the fuck up luke your youtube comment scavenging isnt the world you self absorbed prick

Christ you've mentioned Luke like 16 times in the last 12 hours.

Dustin beat his ass but I've explained why I think Max didn't show up in ideal shape for a fight at a higher weight class. It doesn't take away from him being an elite fighter and p4p talent.

I'm just showing respect. Not everyone has to be a bitter cunt like you, my man.

Daww you have another boogeyman you need to blame for everything you stupid bitch?

type 2 muscle fibers hold way more glycogen and therefore water so stocky explosive guys are by nature able to cut larger amounts of weight safely as long as you do it right

Mental illness.

and more importantly immediately all the weight back on

You know Askren is gonna buttrape Masvidoll right?

And it's going to keep happening as long as you keep handing out (You)s

>ive explained why
Embarrassing conor tier explanation

>didnt show up in ideal shape
What is his ideal shape? Killing himself to look skinnyfat and beat up smaller guys at 145?

>he lost the fight but won the story of my heart!!!!
Literally your entire schpiel

>waaaaah waaah you dont blindly agree with me being retarded youre just bitter cunt!!!
What a respectable positive outlook on life, retard

Does your father know he wasted 18 years just to raise a complete bitch?

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I know.

God forbid someone else explain something right?

No, any average Heawyweight would smash his little tiny body into pieces.

Don't like Masvidal, how come you guys can never just keep this cringy shit in the discord?

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lol you're clearly just looking to pick an internet fight for whatever reason. Maybe you think sperging out of Yea Forums is the sign of being raised right. We can agree to disagree. Hope your dad is proud of your habits.

Are you the depressed Bong that Twitchy used to complain about?

beautiful. thanks

I doubt it I haven't watched one of his streams before. You're obsessed with heem personalities it's weird.

Oh of course! Nobody could ever possibly doubt you! You’re a good happy go lucky respectable good boy and everybody else is just a bitter cunt!

>Maybe you think sperging out of Yea Forums is the sign of being raised right.
Not really! I just know that you’re a complete fucking bitch!

>We can agree to disagree.
Obviously not! You just contradicted yourself from previously saying I was only arguing for the sake!

>Hope your dad is proud of your habits.
He is! I just showed him the entire reply chain. We both laughed and dabbed on your stinky ass.

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You’re really obsessed with imagining enemies to justify your delusions of being an infallible hero. You’re such a fucking dork, Luke. Everyone sees through your pretentious conceited facade.

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It's alright Luke. No more tears baby boy

lol whatever you say dude

That's not what you did.

I missed the cards this weekend which fights are worth watching? Any good webms?

My daddy would heem yours while we dab on your crying stinky ass in the corner to the tune of Mo Bamba

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>2 (You)s, the same number as your amount of mental illnesses

That’s not even me that made the post. You’re such an obnoxious insecure cunt you get offended by people knowing something you didn’t.

So mental illness is a joke to you now, Luke? So much for being this virtuoso you like to imagine yourself as while you sit on a pedestal pretending to be better than others. Fake. Phony. Fraud.

lol I'm sure

Cerrone
That's it

That doesn’t seem sincere! But I’ll take it.

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come on holloway is great

You're a coldhearted piece of work Lucas

That's not what you did.

You remember when Hunt did that butt bomb to Wandy in Pride? I want that but with Andrade

Exactly, because it wasn’t me you deluded fucking retard, Luke. Youre so full of shiteating self

Imagine if you spent as much time training as you did shit posting.

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>RobbieLawler.jpg

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I don't want to hurt anyone, my guy

What if you're a gimp like spammy and are physically unable to train?

You rn

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Your mental illness is funny. Why don't you use it to find out who Luke is and confront him?

Based
Saved
Redpilled!

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So some mental illness is funny, Luke? Thats not what you virtue signal about on Twitter.

Damn

Why do you deny that you are the lukeish one? And why is mental illness a joke to you, Luke? Considering you suffer from it, you should be more serious about this pandemic!

For me, it’s Asturbator

Do you want Andrade to die

Link the twitter.

posting spammy schaub makes any point you make irrelevant. Tired of you fags shitting up my board.

I'm Wandy in this scenario and I want it repeated in a loop

Thawlts on Harry leaving? Is he a caz?

Why are you so pressed?

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No thanks. I’d rather not embarrass you further showing everyone the complete lack of engagement your tweets get

Got my Adesanya tattoo finalized today. U mirin?

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Seriously post it.

Sounds alright

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No. Youre in love with yourself so much, you post it, or does that not make you look humble enough?

I don't know it, show me.

nice

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Donald Cerrone has way more right to call himself LW champ than Khabib does

Nah. I’d rather you just squeam for another thread

Max got robbed

max has the best footwork in mma you fucking ponce

I've got the next thread by the way.

jesus you're autistic as fuck

I've never seen a more worthless chart. Fighters aren't drug tested when they're fighting bums and by the time they're finally being tested they're fighting better competition. If anything that chart shows that fighters fight just fine after getting caught for roiding.

This but unironically

mobile.twitter.com/lukeuidswords

Why do you tweet so much when you average .5 likes a day?

And you’re PRESSED as fuck

So what’s that make Poirier? Some ethereal incalculable level of footwork?

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Schaub is repped by WME's biggest competitor

Go to sleep spammy you've been at it for hours. Have some shame

>footwork is the one and only factor in a fight

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Why does Schaub make you so shook?

So Max had the superior footwork even though he stepped into the path of all of Poirier’s punches?

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He has more followers than I thought he would.

Probably bots. Also why are you referring to yourself in the third person senpai

You realize Max won that fight

Must be some sort of mental illness or something?

I went over this before, he lost the fight but won our hearts!!

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Post crowd shots

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How did you lose your legs? Will you tell us one day?

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lol he stopped posting as soon as you asked. prepare for incoming scat

Based on what? wins over cans like Mike Fairy?

You can't be joking about things like this

They got lost in your enormous prolapsed anus

Boom roasted!

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Homeboy, I am an unbothered black KING. You are PRESSED. Ughhh my mind >>>>

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I pray for you that he never has to fight Romero

Is Romero going to another wedding to be someone’s bridesmaid?

I'm sorry for your loss. Do you have one of those cool electric wheelchairs?

No. I just use your mothers head since she’s in that region all the time

Boom roasted!

She's on your sawed off kneecaps all the time? Huh? Askrenposting isn't gonna change the truth about your disability you know

What are you guys doing?

Waiting to bully you Luke

Sawed off kneecaps? B, I lost my entire legs inside your prolapsed anus, dawg! Your mothers head is in my remaining pelvic region, wadder you doin, my guy?

Im dabbing on some stinky monkey ass, boutchu, b?

I am watching old Bellator events.

cringe

*dabs*

I like how they put out so much content permanently on Youtube

pic related.
...so, no.

also I think this is old, don't JJ and GSP have one more each?

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Being you must really suck scatty the gimpy spammy

in many ways, the frying pan won that fight

This looks like it was taken in the time frame around DC-Jones 2 so JJ should be more around 13-14

Conor proved beyond a doubt that MMA boxing is absolute shit compared to boxing.
Also:
>how astrologically huge
>astrologically
"Astronomically" is the word you were looking for, my semi-literate friend

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I am a respectable good boy! I'm just showing respect. Not everyone has to be a bitter cunt like you, my man!

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I'm not bitter at all and you are not a good person. But it'll get better over the years my gimp buddy

>non boxers aren’t as good at boxing as boxers
Sensational hot take, b

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Anytime anyone thinks they have Lima hurt they get dropped, insane power.

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>Here's your new WW champ bro

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>I’m not bitter
No. You’re actually more sour, big dawg. Your obsession of who you platonically idealize me to be makes me eerily uncomfortable 2bh, b, and makes empathize with not Luke

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Current totals:
GSP - 14
JJ - 12

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His left is money. Sparked Koreshkov with it too. kinda crazy considering he's in orthodox both times. Not a lot of dudes have that kinda lead hand power

seeBen merked his bum ass

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bro, I re-watched Mayeather-McGregor this afternoon and it hurt.
Conor was really bad.
Really poor showing.
Of course Floyd was going to be much better (even retired and at 40-whatever) but Conor was hard to watch.
He didn't even seem to know the rules, so maybe he was hitting peak drug/alcohol abuse or something, instead of training?

if you're not a gimp and are still on Yea Forums this much then jesus christ you must be even worse off than a paraplegic

Theyd both be 13. DJ’s 11th title victory was his 10th defense. His 10th was against Reis in 4/2017. Jon has beaten Gus and Smif while GSP has beaten Bisping in that time span

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I’m not even sure what you’re rambling about this point, homeboy. You should drink a little less while you get fucking DABBED on LMAO

leave the basement once in a while you fucking cave dweller

>the non-boxer should be as orthodox as possible in his approach
Flawless approach, b

Imagine being a chinlet in the year of our lord 2019

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i just counted them up on each Wikipedia page and got 14 for GSP and 12 for JJ. Don't forget he won but then was stripped, so I didn't count that.

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I do. Usually to dab on your dad and facefuck your mother while you jerk your little Chinese tinker toy in the corner

big yikes. you type just like i know you look (weak and hideous)

I remember man.

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Neither did I. It’s definitely erroneous

Do you need someone to project your self-loathing unto, b? Its okay I understand, its the price of being an unbothered GOD like myself

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>a god without legs
That's a new one

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SpamGOD requires NO legs to run around in your noggin pro bono!

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Am I the only one who hates girl fights? I'm white trash and I saw females fight my whole upbringing and I think it's so gross. Turns my dick off. Girl fights are trash.

It all unravels

Yeah but you can't run around irl which is why you spend 18 hours a day here trying to drown others in your misery

I have no hate in my heart, my guy, but is a tizoon assburger like you relly da bes mind to criticize the arlt of shitpostin?

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I never saw girls fight and I hold the same opinion you do, bro.

Further, I just wanted to relax this afternoon, so I drew a hot bath and thought, "I'll watch a baseball game, haven't done that in years; they're always so comfy."
WHAT I EXPECTED: two relaxed men, with deep masculine broadcaster voices, talking only when needed, good chemistry from working together for decades.
WHAT I GOT: a female announcer stating baseball facts, and on-screen graphics showing the strike zone, the travel path of the ball, velocity, all sorts of other shit. Not comfy at all.
WHAT I DID: Watched based Columbus (pic related). Quiet and very comfy movie.

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Keep it up lol. What a life. I'm gonna use your tragic existence as a cautionary tale and stop wasting my time

Sounds pretty gay honestly

>I'm gonna use your tragic existence as a cautionary tale and stop wasting my time
SINCERELY doubt that, b

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Nice taste, user. If you like measured, contemplative films, may I recommend Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring? It's comfy kino.

No, fuck off. If you talk non sports you get reported

Redpill me on Dong Hun Kim
Why is he not competing anymore. He has only lost to Covington, Woodley, Maia and Condit, all championship level fighters. Shouldn't he be something of a gatekeeper in the welterweight division?

Think he fucked his knee or something, also does a lot of generic media shit. He’s Koreas Brendan Schaub

*dabs to Mo Bamba with peg legs*

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thawlts?

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He's a presenter on a tv show now, probably doesn't have enough time to train to the UFC level.

They should cut Elias. The Canadian crowd was booing him lol

Sounds extremely racist. Most definitely is canceled by the discord unless he can explain himself

Israel talks a lot of shit about Yoel.

Would Yoel heem him if they fought?

yes but israel wins in the rematch

How long til we find out the bare knuckle boxing company is a cocaine front and gets shut down

>boxing has been on a steep decline for 50 years
>this is a good thing and not a concern.

uhhh ok

They have given up the Western market

We need a cruiser weight division

Jon Jones would have a losing fight record without all those eye pokes of his

>The thing is, MMA was very much refused by general public
A few butthurt senators and a lazy public

Now adjust for eye pokes/"grazing" and see how many of those wins turn into DQs

pls be shoop

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Heavyweight is unironically the worst weight class to watch.

Most of the time it's two really fat dudes swinging hard and trying to heem each other in round 1.

And If it lasts over 1 round, it's even worse to watch since they gas out and end up doing nothing.

Nobody gives a fuck about steroids, and steroid talk is a distraction from the real issues, number one being condoned eyepoking

Yoel ko's him but adesanya wins the story of the fight

Weight cutting is dumb and doing weighs ins on any other day than 1 hour before the fight is dumb.

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This nigga fucked up big time. He should've kept on riding that mid 00s MMA d-bag wave.Would've probably made a good dime and banged quite a few hotties before the bubble popped.
Instead he went on a vision quest to south america, got the psychedelic version of CTE, changed his name and started a mail order snake oil company. Now he's getting cucked publicly by his dyke gf on instagram. Jesus chroist!

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>If you like measured, contemplative films, may I recommend Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring?
Thanks, bro.

>Sounds pretty gay honestly
What do you mean by gay? I don't get it in the context of what I described.
Maybe I don't know enough about gay lifestyle or whatever?

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reported for being a newfriend and using harsh language. harsh language is only for oldfags, read the sticky, kid.

prime schaub would heem ngannou

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i love her lads

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I love him so much, I just want to protect him from USADA.

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THE GOYIM HAVE FOUND OUT
CODE RED
THIS IS NOT A DRILL

Brendan
F*cking
Shuab

instagram.com/p/BwlZI2thkQf/
What is the connection between Cejudo and Costa?
This makes me like Henry even more.
I'm going to go lift now. Will be thinking about Paulo the Hero.

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You're absolutely f*cking right about that let me tell ya

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Theodorou beats Costa

How sad would it be if Cowboys son turned out to be a frail transexual who who changed her name to Angie

Or even worse, Abella

Is that really worse than being named Dacson Danger

>astrologically huge
>astrologically
what a retard

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>hates Cowboy for displaying his toxic masculinity

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Is there a character that could even possibly EVEN TOUCH Jon Jones? Let alone defeat him. And I'm not talking about Edo Tensei Jon Jones. I'm not talking about Gedou Rinne Tensei Jon Jones either. Hell, I'm not even talking about Juubi Jinchuuriki Gedou Rinne Tensei Jon Jones with the Eternal Mangekyou Sharingan and Rinnegan doujutsus (with the rikodou abilities and being capable of both Amateratsu and Tsukuyomi genjutsu), equipped with his Gunbai, a perfect Susano'o, control of the juubi and Gedou Mazou, with Hashirama Senju's DNA implanted in him so he has mokuton kekkei genkai and can perform yin yang release ninjutsu while being an expert in kenjutsu and taijutsu.

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>modern boxing heavyweight contenders
>6'6+ freaks of nature
>up to 300lbs of natty muscle
>have to be 6'4 to even have a chance at the title but this is considered small, current champs are taller

>mma 'heavyweight'
>weight limit for no reason
>everyones roiding
>literal fat manlet as its champ

wtf?

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>up to 300lbs of natty muscle
baseballman.jpg

it's not a bodybuilding contest, homo

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Khabib is going to bulk up and dominate 2 weight classes just like goob and secure his title as the GOAT. screencap this.

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the GOAT of shagging people's legs for 25 minutes?

wins are wins

coping manlet

epic filename meme!

*blocks his path and perfect record*

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why do white people do this?

Why do some of you faggots insist on avatarposting and trying to force yourself as an epin personality. Like literally just keep posting the same things until people start referring to you as poster

Poothetic.

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Taking a big Schaub rn

rip dernposter

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who saw stipe miocic's retarded ass in the billions episode?

uhhhhhhhhhh this our sport now wh*teboi

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>they aren't watching Shooto
cazzies

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Did we ever figure out what Conor meant when he said "towel mate"?

a towel mate, as in a mate that is a towel

Ruiz is for shore a peach of a specimen

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just work on your irish and talk a bunch of shit. you can easily be a champ in MMA with two months boxing training

DC cucks keep worshiping your fat "white" cheating champ. The croat GOAT is going to tear through him in the rematch

Based

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don't get me wrong, I dislike Cuckmier. However, your "croat goat" has been acting like a complete bitch since he lost the title.
still, it will be hilarious if cuckmier loses and retires after he lost the opportunity of muh money fight

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kek look when that little mexican pushes brock and he just doesnt move and ignores it

gotta be emasculating

anundrid persent

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i know, then he gets pushed away by Dana as if he's pushing a child away. i was actually thinking about renaming the webm to draw attention to that pathetic dwarf.

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>complete bitch
How? He played the waiting game and he won, because he knew Brock was just a posturing mandrama pussy. Same for Cuckmier.

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yeah that example is definitely comparable to whatever the fuck cuckmier is doing. he literally flings his fingers out directly into Stipe's eye - it's not even a jab. what the FUCK is he even trying to do? it's like a fucking backhand finger slap.
at least Stipe is clearly trying to parry the right hand

i don't think people deserve instant rematches, pretty much ever. he's lucky it paid off. really, N'Gannou or JDS should have got the shot without having to fight each other.

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that literal midget trying to shove bork

Stipe might have possibly grazed DC's general eye area

vs

DC literally jammed his thumb knuckle-deep into Stipe's eye literally right before the sequence of the KO

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lmao seething pissbabbies

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>*sniff* I don't know Joe, I thought I was doing good and then he started punching me in the face and um, *sniff* I don't know what happened. I guess I should have eyepoked him again *sobs*
>I'd like to thank me teammates and mu coaches for a wonderful career. Oh man that's just so dissapoint *weeps*

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*whoosh*
*crack*
*boom*
*thud*
*thud*
*thud*
*thud*

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>Luke, Cain p-please somebody help m-me please he's g-gonna kill meeeee!

This is you HW """"""champion""""""

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this is literally one of the greatest finishes in MMA history.
>setting up the headkick with bodykicks for first 2 rounds
>exploiting tendency to lean right to dodge
>trip when rocked
>flying bodykick to put him down
>some of the most vicious ground and pound you'll ever see
>finishes fighter who's never been finished before
>makes him cry

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>cries on Cain's shoulder backstage
>cries at the press conference
>cries in the octagon in the rematch
What next? Will he cry during the actual fight this time while Stipe is drilling CTE into him?

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Last month including this month has pretty good of WMMA fights. Van Burren and Chiasson are the definitely the future for WMMA.

>They have given up the Western market

No they haven't, WMMA is part of the western market too.

don't think you're gonna kick me in the head with your left leg jon

>Jones offers up a bit of friendly banter with DC, saying "I bet I could take you down"
>The autistic Cuckmier spazzes out, moves down an entire weight division, almost kills himself cutting weight, just to end up getting taken down and dominated the entire fight

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It’s like a bathmate but for dry times

if Jon wasn’t allowed to fight back I’m confident DC would win 8/10 times

Embedded classic
youtu.be/-6YH6NgNfDk
youtu.be/-6YH6NgNfDk
youtu.be/-6YH6NgNfDk

It's great because everyone was picking Stipe the first time and I got DC at such insane odds, now everyone is picking DC and Stipes going to win as an underdog.

The classic Schaub hustle

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Every fight stipe won he was the underdog so imho it makes sense
im sceptical about his win due to much time out of camp
idk i might bet because hes a croat

In many ways, if DC hadn't poked Stipe in the eye which affected his chin, he wouldn't have got knocked out cold.

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was this and all the memes surrounding it, the best event so far?

BBBASSSEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDZZZZQQQUUUAAADDDDDD

didn't dc become a slight favorite on fight day ?
the cazzies probably googled stipesherdog, and saw that he got knocked out even by that big stiff idiot struve

just here to remind you that this weekend there is a card in brazil featuring

>Jose Aldo
>Anderson Silva

neither of which are the main event
honk

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He was +132 on fight day according to bestfightodds, and before that he was +240

it's even funnier because geriatric silva vs a literal can is higher up on the card that prime jose

Yes

Lol holy shit this fucking loser hours earlier was talking about having “shit to do”

God what a pathetic fucking autistic loser you are, schitzy, an entire hour having a meltdown at 2am

I just want to win and have this blare over the stadium speakers
youtube.com/watch?v=JpF2JKtTISY

Underrated post.

Damn dude, heem is a lie. All this time I thought the memes on heem were inside jokes but they were mostly all started on r/mma. I just went there out of boredom and they do all the same meme shit that's here like brenlan shlub shit. I thought that was specifically some stupid heem meme. You guys are lame

Stay there

I know I'm getting old because I'm still dead from staying up for the UFC, I tried to stay awake all day to have a normal sleeping pattern for work but only made it till 10am luckily I have today off but I can barely keep my eyes open.

you know what to do

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>tfw rewatching DC vs Jones II
HE WAS DOING SO WELL!

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L
O
SE
R
S

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>not a loser

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LUKAS SCHOTT OF BERLIN GERMANY RUNS THIS SHIT

YA MAKE YOUR OWN PIES

YA ROLL THE DOUGH

PUT ON THE CHEESE

SHOVE EM INTO THE OVENNN

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DRAKE OR BILLIE EILISH WHO'S YOUR PICK? NO TROLLING FAVOURITE FEMALE FIGHTER.

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i like rose because she cute

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www.twitter.com/punisher_bass
the only man who can save the world from the axis of evil

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FUCK LITHUANIA
FUCK FINLAND
FUCK RUSSIA
GERMANY ESTONIA AMERICAN ALLIANCE

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Everybody is on steroids

fruitcakes

L
O
SE
R
S

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:)

fruitcakes

Russian faggot meet me in person and ill heem you into the next life

people surprised Mikuru wrestled. he wrestled to beat Dautbek too. Kai wrestled to beat Kape and Topnoi.

stop spamming or I'll leak the pics. you know which ones.

Does he even have a chance?

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Haha FUCK YOU
>Wymyn in main fight
>Silva and Aldo in the same event
What the fuck, why

>unironically wobbled and dropped by Mendes
Lol no

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muh titlefights

Max is now 0-3 against southpaws for what its worth, that motivated my Poirier pick as much as anything, couldnt get it out of my mind

After watching his instagram story, Memebender is now officially my favorite fighter. A true outdoorsman

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Because /heem/ is love, buddeh

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You’re in for a big surprise if you ever watch Aldo-Mendes 2

For me it was the fact that everybody has this dumb narrative that Max is way too big for Featherweight, when his reach is fucking Bantamweight tier. Bro just loses a lot of weight in his face he's not that big.

>Tfw Jon is the runt of the litter
Imagine his brothers running the heavyweight division if they had chose to train mma rather than Football. Guess they'll have to make do with wallet mogging Jon along with height mogging, weight mogging and leg mogging him

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>gauging by Mendes
Jose ripped the cage off the octagon

You mean the one where Aldo won convincingly and never got dropped or even stunned by Chad's best shots? Yeah, I'm glad you brought it up

Do they really make more than him? That's pretty sad if the MMA GOAT makes less than some low-level handegg bums.

For me, it's MindSmash

Oh yeah youre in for a big surprise my guy

Both have won super bowls. Arthur was pretty mid level but good enough to last a fair few years. Chandler is actually a beast though. Arthur had a 33 million dollar contract at one point. Americans sure do love them some hand egg

based and bombpilled

How many bongs for askren?

>tfw now a single (you) on the russian's losers list

stay jelly losers

Bumgay asshole is getting flushed down the prehistoric broken sewers of rio he’ll be getting gadooshed into a crowd with a big brown stain on his shorts

DP 10-9
DP 10-9
MH 10-9
MH 10-9
DP 10-9

herculean effort from Dusty Poitier to overcome the P4P king

why hasnt BJ Penn's fight at
@UFC
237 been scrapped and he been psychiatrically evaluated before he can compete again?

Gaethje did his thing and handed the baton off to Rodtang, don’t let me down lil tank #ANewEra

Tenshin’s jab looks good

Because the PooFC doesn't actually care about their fighters' mental health. They're only crafting this narrative about Tony because they know that if he were to get the belt he's the only person power to bring down the corrupt monopoly that is the UFC. That's why they planted the chip in his leg.

Rashad growing some J. Cole dreads in woke retirement #UFCPrague

B&R

I'm an "indie" man myself, Elliot Smith, Sufjan Stevens, Jon Fitch, the list goes on, my man

look boys, we got a music nerd here

Aldo still the most offensively deadly fighter ever in MMA

Olivera out of the 1st round means hes probably going to lose now

Alves corner need to pull him and he needs to retire

wikipedia.org/wiki/UFC_Fight_Night:_Assunção_vs._Moraes_2

I punch low hanging twigs from my trees in the backyard and question mark kick my dog. Pretty sure I could heem anyone here.

I agree with a lot of the stuff Luke says.

Misery loves company

Askren was out

And company can heal misery.

I clearly saw him inside the cage

>ngannou
>guinness record for punching power
>is an olympic wrestler compared to wilder
>seems to have a decent chin
Do you even read what you write?

Lol that retarded nog would get headkicked into infinity

What people wont admit is shes the real goat, name one women fighter that can beat her right bow

Is it just me or does ben askren not look like a real person when he talks. He falls into that uncanny valley for me.

Based rory for taking in our savior

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instagram.com/p/BxIHUSnHOz-/

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My man JOHNNY comin for you bones Jones

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Miocic wins the trilogy

>1 hour ago
I swear that pic is over a year old. I remember /heem/ clowning on the slum

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Schaub will be the next Michael Richards

It is from before he fought Moicano.

you're an idiot, please don't post here again

is ariel seriously going to invite this ben askren dude on his show every fucking week

its ALMOST like being short can be an advantage in wrestling...

costa murks adesanya

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In some pics she looks...well, like this. But in some she hella cute.

Costa murks everyone in MW except for Elias

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crocop and cyborg got better

i havent watched a single helwani show since he sold himself out

Even doing one cycle will give you lifelong performance gains.

rothwell because he thought he won, before he lost

Look at him just teleport behind Rob on the ground. It's incredible.

Casual.

More hardcore than you Achmed.

my internal clock is shit, that was in feb

behind who?

@thecausalfightfan

UFC 237 is terrible

Donald "Cowboy" "The Humbler" "Daddy Day Care" Cerrone.

I am 21, have about 2 months of boxing experience from my Uni's boxing club, if I wanted to go pro in MMA what path would I take? I was thinking of pairing kickboxing and MMA and training in all my free time to get good. I would be fighting at heavyweight or light heavyweight. I graduate Uni in two weeks, last week of classes now. I was considering joining an MMA gym to learn wrestling and kickboxing.

>this card is bad before it happened
How to spot a casual.

dont bother with kickboxing

muay thai and wrestling defence is all you gonna need

Daniel "Daniel Cormier" Cormier

how big is pat

Don't join a MMA gym. Join a wrestling gym and a muay thai or boxing gym.

>the card is good because its bad
How to spot a plebbit pseud.

It's not good or bad. I won't know if it was good or bad until it happens and I see the fights.

In many ways......

It's bad because of the quality and irrelevancy of most of the matchups. Just like every shitty international card always turns out to be shit, likely so too will this one. Granted it has slightly better name value and more intriguing matchups than most, but that is because it's a PPV.

What a dumb post

show us your insight then

alright someone has to say it
FUCK N

Whats wrong with MMA gyms? The ones in my area have coaches who specialize in specific martial arts such as kickboxing, wrestling, etc.

N schaub

I did. I called yours, dumb

pat barry's property.

All this rain lately has been a real bitch, eh Coral?

Why would I look out a window lol

I am boxing!

Based

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He needs to shut up and fight cowboy

Schaub

you fat fuck i will make sure you're dead within the next 3 months

report buttons are for those who couldnt survive a day in the wild

ya aint gonna make it ya freedom hating fucking zilch ahhahahahahahahhahahaha it's allllllllllllllll overrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr you're fucking flushed gadhooshed JOANNA ZNALLEA BLESS DLADSS!!!!!!!!@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ grow up you fucking doofus with no chin step up or step off mannnnnnnnnnnnn he said STEP OFF GEORGE LIKES THE BANANASSS

YOU HAVE NOTHING ON ME BLUD WITH ALL YOUR BUTTONS OF DELETION LOL FUCKING LOSER FUN HATING DOPE

Yea Forums Founder ##faggot

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES
i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES
i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

FLOUNDER FIRST TIME AVAILABLE IN AMERICA IS THAT TRUE

report buttons are for those who couldnt survive a day in the wild

ya aint gonna make it ya freedom hating fucking zilch ahhahahahahahahhahahaha it's allllllllllllllll overrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr you're fucking flushed gadhooshed JOANNA ZNALLEA BLESS DLADSS!!!!!!!!@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ grow up you fucking doofus with no chin step up or step off mannnnnnnnnnnnn he said STEP OFF GEORGE LIKES THE BANANASSS

YOU HAVE NOTHING ON ME BLUD WITH ALL YOUR BUTTONS OF DELETION LOL FUCKING LOSER FUN HATING DOPE

Yea Forums Founder ##faggot

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES
i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES
i own /heem/ is in SHAMBLES

FLOUNDER FIRST TIME AVAILABLE IN AMERICA IS THAT TRUE

report buttons are for those who couldnt survive a day in the wild

ya aint gonna make it ya freedom hating fucking zilch ahhahahahahahahhahahaha it's allllllllllllllll overrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr you're fucking flushed gadhooshed JOANNA ZNALLEA BLESS DLADSS!!!!!!!!@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ grow up you fucking doofus with no chin step up or step off mannnnnnnnnnnnn he said STEP OFF GEORGE LIKES THE BANANASSS

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derek
lukas
airplane

coming in full force to end your life you fat zilch

GROW
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wdoifgnapwoifawe;iognawegnawer;oitg34p'tj43908rt3498u51048957180475189347508934yt6p8934htg;oaindfg;isdfnvb;ikfn;vboiefngo;iaehr;gaerhgpa890erhgpa90erypga90erhgpa8erhgpaerngpae8_DID IT REALLY HAVE TO COME TO THIS YOU FREEDOM HATING FUCKING ZILCH MODS

Attached: heem_predicts_ufc237.jpg (2500x2500, 1.08M)

So the spammer is trying to make taking picks a bannable offense, nice try fatso it'll never happen.

I love having functional legs

Pleease figt me.conner i.will lose to you, make me some money waaah waaah

Ragin al is still my boy

which one of you zero income zeroes is the mod?

You have been permanently banned from all boards for posting , a violation of Global Rule 14:

Users may not post from proxies, VPNs, or Tor exit nodes.

Your ban was filed on August 20th, 2018. This ban will not expire.

>THE ABSOLUTE CITY OF THIS FUCKING LOSER

sitting in a thread getting 2 posts per hour with his little pwoxy detwekter

is this how you get your jollies seinfeld? maybe that's how you get your kicks. you and your good time buddies.

not on my watch fatso. i'm on you like a pitbull on a poodle. get a hobby you hopeless romantic. lmfao you will quit before i do you low income beta zilch lmmfao @ ur low income """"""""""""""""""""""life""""""""""

unlimited money
unlimited time
no fear
no worries
millionaire
white
living in your head RENT FREE CTED SCHAUB CAPTAIN DOME'D ZILCHG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You have been permanently banned from all boards for posting , a violation of Global Rule 14:

Users may not post from proxies, VPNs, or Tor exit nodes.

Your ban was filed on August 20th, 2018. This ban will not expire.

>THE ABSOLUTE CITY OF THIS FUCKING LOSER

sitting in a thread getting 2 posts per hour with his little pwoxy detwekter

is this how you get your jollies seinfeld? maybe that's how you get your kicks. you and your good time buddies.

not on my watch fatso. i'm on you like a pitbull on a poodle. get a hobby you hopeless romantic. lmfao you will quit before i do you low income beta zilch lmmfao @ ur low income """"""""""""""""""""""life""""""""""

unlimited money
unlimited time
no fear
no worries
millionaire
white
living in your head RENT FREE CTED SCHAUB CAPTAIN DOME'D ZILCHG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You have been permanently banned from all boards for posting , a violation of Global Rule 14

Attached: jgfj.jpg (225x225, 8K)

prepare for hell you fat fuck this will never stop

I am spamming the living fuck out of this general in about 12 hours. I am constantly running a bot on Yea Forums. Fuck censorship, fuck mods, fuck conservation officers, fuck anyone who doesn't worship the only thing real that matters: me. Don't reply. I'm literally not reading it you fucking low income small dicked beta millennial zilch.

fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE FUCK YOU YOU SMALL BRAINED FUCKING ZERO

I am spamming the living fuck out of this general in about 12 hours. I am constantly running a bot on Yea Forums. Fuck censorship, fuck mods, fuck conservation officers, fuck anyone who doesn't worship the only thing real that matters: me. Don't reply. I'm literally not reading it you fucking low income small dicked beta millennial zilch.

fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE FUCK YOU YOU SMALL BRAINED FUCKING ZERO

I am spamming the living fuck out of this general in about 12 hours. I am constantly running a bot on Yea Forums. Fuck censorship, fuck mods, fuck conservation officers, fuck anyone who doesn't worship the only thing real that matters: me. Don't reply. I'm literally not reading it you fucking low income small dicked beta millennial zilch.

fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
fuck you to the fucking loser who deletes this
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE FUCK YOU YOU SMALL BRAINED FUCKING ZERO

Attached: mods.jpg (259x194, 9K)

you're clearly gay

Attached: mfw.png (1076x735, 575K)

Yeah, it feels more like a non ppv card tbch.

Based jannies

Big if true

who revved him?

Muh title fights

Wait, Robbie is black?

I love how he puts literally zero power behind his punches.

It unironically should be legal to slaughter and behead all jannies

Lukas the Yandex account got flagged/permabanned. Can't use it. Reason you're not getting a reply lol.

Rose vs Andrade will be FOTY, you hear it first from me.

hate to break it to you but the spammers have been taking the picks every event for years lmfao

lol just tried 5 email services to get to you lukas this is an INTERPOL INTERCEPTION LIGHT YOUR SSDS ON FIRE

jesus yandex fucking flushed me, made 5 account 5 different IPs they're locking me out of contact

Lmao try protonmail

i tried everything that doesn't ask for an email for sms or just to verify through another email, all failed ITS A CONSPIRACY AND YOURE ALL IN ON IT

report every post with the word NIGGER it will get them banned

UNLIMITED MONEY
UNLIMITED PROXIES
UNLIMITED TIME
UNLIMITED SEX WITH LITTLE GIRLS
GYMNASTICS BLESS
COSTA RICA BLESS

*phone for sms or a second email for verification

anyway i'm going to sleep gotta fuck my wife's son in the morning goodnight

Lmao ttyl you got my email

Mate you need some /heem/ references when you make it. When they ask your fav fighter say prime Schaub

I don't think I should have drank 32 ounces of prune juice lads, I'm literally vomiting out of my asshole every hour

Attached: 1518338876489.png (911x886, 659K)

>tfw not friends with Khabib

seems like such a bro

faggot

based

If you guys don’t make a new thread soon I will do it.

stream for wrasslin match between Askren and the nigger?

The trip is so high IQ

Jon truly is the GOAT of GOATs. I really want to see him and Rockhold go at it on the ground. Would also love to see him go up to HW and beat a monster like Ngannou

Settle down spammy, that wasn't me. Glad to see you still at it 12 hours later though

New thread? I have to post about Ben Askren getting his ass whooped by a based black man.

No you won't retard

Never mind I did it

jon face mogs at least

your mom

CQC asf