/hoc/

Did you know that over the past decade, the Calgary Flames had fewer playoff wins(6) than the Edmonton Oilers(7).

new

>rags

>Jets only have 3 picks in the draft
>A 2nd, a 4th, and a 5th
>3.9m in cap space with a fucking of expiring contracts including:
>Laine
>Connor
>Hayes
>Tanev
>Myers
>Trouba
>Lindholm, Beaulieu, Chiarot, Copp, Morrow, both backup goalies too

Attached: 208BE5F0-91C8-43F4-9586-FBF7E376D604.jpg (720x859, 31K)

you're about 490 posts early bro

Attached: sketch-1555815607996.png (1280x440, 164K)

user why are you staring at my shoes like that?

Attached: 54447374_279200362969977_2189032110060167027_n.jpg (1080x1350, 120K)

this thread is gonna get deleted just because of the OP pic, it's happened literally every single time

ayy lmao

who fuckin cares we will make a knew one >>if

Attached: 1479943314955.png (500x600, 93K)

fucking chambers

5-2

is it just the perspective or do her legs look way too long

>self-policing
>making jannies life easier

Attached: 1550295557634 (1).jpg (300x400, 13K)

i just did ya fag

listening to the drive soundtrack again lads

Attached: 1554514071443.jpg (320x286, 31K)

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU ARE A ALIEN

She's fucking tall you idiot. Not every woman is a 4'11" mexican.

Is there a player in the nhl better than Ovechkin? Can't honestly tell me Crosby or McDavid rn

why does chambers have such shit taste in women lads

I will only accept a Caps repeat or Boston winning.

matthews

her tan makes her look like a beaner tho

Stop my penis can only get so soft

LGB

Attached: louie.jpg (923x1024, 289K)

mark stone obviously

>wienerpeg
>shitterpeg
>cuckerpeg
>pooperpeg
>dookiepeg

Big bepises
:DDDDDDDDDD

>the teepee and wigwam village of Vinnybeg

where is sam with his super ironic and hilarious commentary?

you can tell this guy hasn't had sex

Attached: winnipeg-jets-forward-patrik-laine.png (620x349, 346K)

For me it's Columbus or Dallas.

My cock has a big red neck

Whatd I do to you?

he fucked your mom last night lmao

watching titanic desu

use real words

I would say he’s with God now but suicides don’t go to Heaven

AND I LOST IT ALL, NOTHING LASTS FOREVER

IM SORRY

I CANT BE

PERFECT

Attached: lineay.jpg (1280x720, 134K)

leafs nation

Nah some would have bouht him an escort by now

i doubt it, my mom was busy having sex with brayden schenn

lowkey based ngl

GIVE TROUBA

Attached: 1555724470819.jpg (1280x720, 252K)

those 80's escorts were pretty sweet

The two tape VHS version?

San Jose is a suburb of Vegas

Attached: 2yohdy.jpg (500x500, 68K)

remember when all the leafs on this board were talking all that good shit about how the leafs were trash and would get knocked out the first round and now they are the only remaining team in the playoffs?

Attached: 1489288415558.gif (645x773, 9K)

Sportsnet creating bad karma

Attached: 1509169845048.png (420x449, 75K)

I need a webm of Dougie delivering Ovi a Sbisapizza

Attached: pizza.webm (1280x720, 2.85M)

yeah bitches leafs nation is here and none of you are hahahahahahah

dont use the b word man

I’m literally going to rape myself

GO STARS

How can anyone support the knights especially over the based caps

Based Zuccarello and Radulov

Also how did Bishop get nominated for a Vezina i thought Dalass was shit

Friendly reminder that it was
>3-0

Excuse me sir do you have a moment to talk about our team and savior the yotes?

Bishop has had a great year.
Not as shit as all the canadian teams ;)

kate winslet was super hot in titanic, lads

despite your hitlers bday dubs i must disagree the caps are the epitome of reddit and vegas is pornhub

Attached: gettyimages-861116302.jpg?w=0&h=1024&crop=1.jpg (843x1024, 239K)

YUCK!!!

Not for long

Attached: 52RvQu2.jpg (214x278, 46K)

hope you got your kleenex ready for tomorrow

Are you scared? You will be.

This is not a meme discussion idiot. Dallas barely made the playoffs. I assume their offense was garbage all year and Bishop held the fort. And their offence us clicking now as it should be.

Fuck niggers

Going to need to demand a Hitler’s bday just before Easter scared status check lads

sounds like someone needs a tedervention

No disrespect to the jackets, I'm a firm believer that Columbus sweeping them is a huge fluke and robs the Lightning of truly accomplishing what their capable of. I've spent the last few days in pure disbelief and it just doesn't make sense to me. I've spent the entire regular season watching the Lightning play great hockey it's just not fair.

If the Lightning lose again I will face that the Blue Jackets deserved the win, but I am just 100% sure it was a fluke and does a big disservice to the Lightning and the NHL.

leafs will sweep the jackets

Dude they are back to back contendies from nothing, that sucks. Ovi and company are based and you know it. Let them have back to backs and then I'd be happy to fade into obscurity for 5 years but we need a legend

Please, >we have this in the bag

Attached: Smuk Bruin .jpg (414x430, 40K)

stfu fggt

did any of you guys see Hilary Knight today? I heard she was doing between period analysis but it must have been on a different feed.

Any word from Sam?

fuck...

Attached: screenshot_IMG121818.01.png (480x852, 50K)

FAKE AS FUCK

Based and capspilled

i'd dump you too desu

Quick call her a nigger and break up first.

Heard she was on a different feed than mine but that she was good. I think she would be a good commentator unironically. They need to allow hitting in women’s hockey ASAP

Send her a picture of Ted’s dick

lol even your phone calls you a virgin

>fake
>charge your phone even though its fake

fucking dude weed meme event now the beach is gonna be filthy

Attached: dppflgob6it21.png (1024x640, 891K)

Sounds good. I am for more contact as long as the players know how to throw and take hits effectivly. The rivalry series showed how damn good the 2 teams are when they are allowed to play a little more chippy

5-0

and more importantly
>4-2
come tomorrow

blazed

Basted

I want them to allow hitting in the women’s game because I do unironically think a WNHL could be as big as the WNBA. In the off-season /hoc/ fans are starved. But the no hitting is such a turn off

Feelin fine

Should I have beer or pour a glass of whiskey

that was a few hours ago

Business idea: on a delayed penalty you can't pull your goalie, but he can join the attack.

>consuming estrogenic liquid bread
whisky is the only choice of alcohol. The other only choice is no alcohol.

I would argue it could be bigger. Women's hockey has never been given the benefit of the doubt so they have had to form their own leagues and show improvement every year. The WNBA will always be traditional basketball and while it still has niche fans, It doesn't have crossover appeal for NBA fans. Even somebody who doesn't follow womens hockey could sit down and watch the Olympics and enjoy it. Another snag is the talent difference. Basketball is largely dominated by the USA, they have never lost an Olympic final in over 30 years and only lost FIBA once in 2006. Other than that, nobody challenges them on a world scale so It makes it incredibly boring.

Womens hockey has 3 superpowers and the teams below them improving quickly and training some pretty darn good players. Womens Basketball has 1, the USA and thats it.

Attached: USA Basketball.jpg (1920x1409, 296K)

love it, I want to see a blue line goalie

She looks like a sex swap of Ryan Reynolds.

*tink tink*
*AHEM*
>rags

Attached: 1544498732267.jpg (225x227, 9K)

just took a stinky johnny gaudreau. had to flush 3 times and it left some nasty skidmarks in the bowl.

business idea: multi-goalie

youtube.com/watch?v=IKSu7RT2wN0

Attached: 1538028058049.gif (354x286, 53K)

>Buddy, you suck at hockey! And you’ve been without a Stanley Cup for how long? How long? And you’re still haven't got it?

Why have teams from this country choked for 26 years straight?

Attached: Flag_of_Canada.png (1200x600, 9K)

I'm listening.

Attached: yeshenlo.jpg (480x285, 36K)

Based the banjo player is amazing
youtube.com/watch?v=B9FzVhw8_bY

What does he do?

Attached: p.k.-subban-2019-1412.jpg (434x600, 46K)

You’re lying, it would be way too small to need 3 flushes

Black stuff

...

business idea: heated rinks to encourage qts to wear open-toed footwear

im better off alone beatin' off

Wouldn’t be the worst thing if a puck came flying over the glass and caved your head in

Attached: 15197718-361E-47A8-B8AD-823D5995712C.png (1000x1000, 67K)

in real /hoc/ markets its snowing outside for most of the season tho

shut up faggot

But he's the worst ape in the league. Even his brother is better than him at this point

there is a 3rd subban brother thats a career ahler
eliteprospects.com/player/97951/jordan-subban

what if i like ass, tits, and feet?

post some chill tunes
youtube.com/watch?v=Juh9vOPfx8A&t

Making a diabeetus-tastic dessert for zombie jesus day

fight people and shit

ayy
lmao

YOU SEE I'VE BEEN THROUGH THE DESERT ON A HORSE WITH NO NAME

Saw him play this season, fucker's fast but looks lost 80% of the time.

Heres some more Saskatchewan music for ya /hoc/
youtube.com/watch?v=hCebq5lLgos

How does a jet lose to a music note?

for me? it's n64 wrestling games

Doesn't take much to down a plane with no pilot

They're like the Ball family except not fronting lol

Based

You can't cut a musical note in half

well, the >jest got lucky last season in the draw, Rinne is a bum and so they advanced. Now they're out because they didn't draw a sieve in teh first round.

youtube.com/watch?v=npuuTBlEb1U

Thank you for providing musical accompaniment to this thread, Leaf.

HE

IS

AUTISTIC

P K THE DIVING KONG

Avery - Dubinsky - Jagr
Dawes - Gomez - Shanahan
Straka - Drury - Callahan
Strudwick - Betts - Hollweg

Tyutin - Girardi
Staal - Mara
Roszival - Malik

Lundqvist

I'm watching a legandary game with this lineup right now

Attached: 1555383230691.jpg (1015x1080, 154K)

cringe desu. Aki Engine overhyped garbage.

>"tap, sac, shock tomb, thoughtsieze"
whats the hockey equivalent?

Attached: Image.jpg (223x310, 30K)

Attached: rantanen.webm (1280x720, 2.96M)

Is it the estrogen in the water that makes teams from this country suck in the playoffs?

Attached: Canada.png (720x603, 638K)

Who should win vezina trophy?

Me

Bishop

youtube.com/watch?v=SYfJuW282_I

The ABSOLUTE state of Calgary. You can almost hear the puck binging with each pass.
*BING*
*BING*
*BING*
*WAHOOOOOOOO*

Khudobin

In a surprise move, Bettman awards it to himself.

me

Yzerman

campbell

kino

That's 'Sports Broadcasting Hall of Fame Inductee' Gary Bettman, for you

they need to bring back the based 'diques

Attached: joe-sakic-nordiques.jpg (900x600, 59K)

Gary handed me a copy of the revised script today. He's giving himself every award. Teds are also going to the conference finals.

post >yfw relocanes-teds ECF

Attached: honk dab.png (757x615, 168K)

Attached: happy guy.jpg (425x310, 33K)

>'Sports Broadcasting Hall of Fame Inductee' Gary Bettman handed me a copy of the revised script today. He's giving himself every award. Teds are also going to the conference finals.
ftfy

Attached: monkas.png (1200x675, 211K)

Attached: suicide day.jpg (646x348, 23K)

its going to be a 7 game sweep isnt it

Attached: 1515447866868.png (483x701, 311K)

Thank you swede bro. Don't want the Sports Broadcasting Hall of Fame Inductee Gary Bettman cops showing up at my house.

Attached: mia loves you.jpg (603x1026, 109K)

at the ritz next to the stape rn haha having tons of fun!

Attached: 2006.jpg (400x269, 27K)

Exactly
Stop posting lewd pictures of my fiance

Attached: infinitejest.png (344x540, 76K)

>________ is a big winger who combines size, skating and skill. A strong skater who can blast past the opposition in full speed. Able to use his size, reach and stickhandling skills to retain the puck in speed. A smart player at both ends of the ice, both on and off the puck. Great work ethic and positive attitude. More of a playmaker than a scorer and could improve his shooting skills, although already equipped with an accurate release. Doesn't shy away from physical play, but could use his size more to his benefit.

guess who

Sidney Crosby

why is she so ugly bros?

Attached: 1495124693716.jpg (1855x1045, 194K)

right

Attached: buludama.jpg (1024x576, 60K)

>A smart player at both ends of the ice, both on and off the puck
Must be

Attached: bulju.jpg (784x554, 55K)

>Great work ethic and positive attitude
There's only one guy that this could be.

Attached: tr pul.png (714x714, 693K)

uncanny

lads i'm a new capitals fan after their success last year. I live in philly ( hate the flyers tho) and would like the stand out from the crowd a lil.

Any ideas on which player jersey I should get? I like holtby since he does support LGBT rights but not sure yet.....

Vasilevskiy

ovechkin so that people know you were they since the beginning

Attached: 1552079381627.png (466x574, 288K)

>LGBT rights
Sounds more like a Penguins fan

Devanty-Smith or whatever the fuck his halfbreed name is. I've heard the Philly fans dislike niggers. but at the same time the city is full of them

Attached: dsgfsdgerg.png (504x256, 219K)

Attached: 1506569733186.jpg (225x225, 12K)

Go Stars

>flakes

Attached: freeze.gif (600x337, 3.43M)

have sex

Sounds pretty unhygienic and gross desu

Attached: Whore-Hot-Dog-Shirt-Guy.gif (300x171, 1.81M)

dont @ me

Attached: uh_no_sweetie.jpg (473x226, 14K)

Imagine having 62 wins that mean absolutely nothing lmao

you mean like the Mets?

>a apehoop post in /hoc/
die whore...

Attached: 1485477783121.jpg (1059x903, 299K)

>Mets
>Apehoop

Attached: 1506101929185.png (394x379, 19K)

youtube.com/watch?v=xCoFz-Fi_40

Attached: 1539969720777.jpg (634x471, 39K)

Even without sound this webm is still louder than the Saddledome was last night.

Cant tell if baiting or actual low IQ post

apehoop, boreball, niggercollide, it's all the same shit.

Martin jones

trips of truth

go knights

Which would you rather watch, women's ice hockey or men's roller hockey?

Men’s roller hockey

tranny's field hockey

I've never watched women's hockey, do they check each other?

This, Rip Jets they've got a total of 27 contracts running out next year

incel

>would you rather have a steak thats been cooked to leather, slathered in ketchup and the cook blew his nose on it or some tasty chicken?

Men's roller hockey. Its something kind of different than ice hockey. Women's ice hockey would be no different from men's ice hockey, just significantly shittier.

Attached: warrior-stroker-hockey-gloves-limited_1_23ac3620559d82e58be8d3d6a1aed01f.jpg (309x400, 44K)

No. They wear full cages too because they don't want to scar their faces or have teeth knocked out and ruin their 4/10 looks

>looking up your old crush on fb
>see all the posts you and get posted on each other’s walls in 08/09
>they are full of mega cringe
>try to delete one
>page reorients and you like an unliked post from 10+ years ago
>close, delete fb app
>open Yea Forums for comfort

Sports moments / music / movies for this feel? Kill me boiz

no you literally get a penalty for bodychecking in dykepuck

Then why the fuck would anyone watch that?

They don’t. That’s his point.

Just unlike it, remove it from your timeline, and if they say shit just tell them you were cleaning up old shit from your timeline and hit that by mistake.

This is why I don't creep people. Too many things can go wrong and there are too many apps now that let people know they're being creeped.

Sometimes they manage to paralyze themselves by tripping into the boards headfirst, so if you enjoy watching people fuck themselves up it can on rare occasion be interesting.

Either they're massive cucks and want to show how progressive they are by watching women's hockey or they're massive cucks and want to be fucked by some burly female hockey bulldyke with a strapon.

Please tell me someone saved that thread of that cringy faggot who was asking if its a good idea to try to get one of the female players to sign an autograph to him as "your future husband"

Attached: 1548732032920.jpg (435x690, 80K)

>facebook

Ok grampa

I don't care that they wear full cages, like whatever, people wear fishbowls and its not a big deal.
But I dont understand why they can't hit each other. I wonder what would happen if you took a poll of the players and asked them if they wanted to be able to check or not.

youtu.be/bSuxnF8dOPU

>some burly female hockey bulldyke
Now wait just a minute there, buddy

Attached: Ronja Savolainen.jpg (1000x1200, 119K)

Attached: My Jonsson.jpg (240x288, 14K)

would bang/10

Attached: alfranken.png (856x728, 1.12M)

Attached: selma aho.jpg (1000x1200, 145K)

the IIHF instituted hitting in the 1990 World Championship as a way for europeans to be able to compete with Canada. What they found out was Canada and the USA destroyed everyone else. Since then it has been outlawed.

>those fake eyebrows
No thanks.

Red Bull team in NHL when?

Attached: Red_Bull_logo.png (1000x529, 9K)

Lol gay.

t. incel

Damn, these few girls with 5/10 faces and the bodies of lego men sure proved me wrong. I can't wait for you to spam /hoc/ with more of them

Attached: ciwhp.png (352x440, 256K)

will be NY's 4th team

what the fuck is fb?

have sex

You know most /hoc/ posters actually played hockey and weren't absolute social rejects until after they reached adulthood, right?

have sex

Quebéc City Red Bulls
>t. Russian doll face poster
kys

>t. Women's Hockey Player
Sorry Shrek, you're not going to guilt me into giving you some dick.

Literally not one person here has ever played ice hockey.

nice

her cousin's are cute though

Attached: Nicole & Julia Gosling.jpg (960x540, 334K)

t. floridian lifelong fan

>t. Russian doll face poster
What does this even mean? Just because I'm not bending over for anything with a pulse I have to love you spamming mediocre at best looking girls?

I unironically like the the Ducks goal horn/song.

Bruh, I learned how to skate before I could walk.

Don't listen to the swede, he's just fishing for (You)s.

I played till from 3rd to 9th grade but made the mistake of picking football over it when the schedules collided. I still regret that choice.

what the fuck is sex?

I played I'm just terrible

i got cut from junior a because the coach said i wasnt big enough. it still hurts.

>mediocre at best looking girls?
Post the face of anyone you think is attractive and let's see if it's your taste or mine that stinks of shit

benis in berginer or something like that.
idk, I've never done it.

Whiskey's supposed to drown the memory
I've gone from one to one too many
And the thing that really gets me
Is how your memory drowns the whiskey

youtube.com/watch?v=p9xYYSAo7UU

Attached: 234432.jpg (318x286, 29K)

Reminder to wash your pucks

Attached: 5972065.jpg (225x195, 6K)

Whisky lullaby is a much better song
youtube.com/watch?v=IZbN_nmxAGk

It's the number six in swedish

Why do people post this stuff about their private medical history online

t. goalie

Ayy lmao with tits

>mediocre at best looking girls?
Yes. They're 5/10s (at best) in makeup. They're not explicitly unattractive but they aren't really pretty either. You factor in their horrifying lego bodies and they are below average overall.
>Post the face of anyone you think is attractive and let's see if it's your taste or mine that stinks of shit
>I-If you d-don't post girls you think are attractive I'm perfectly validated in spamming this thread with cherrypicked examples nobody asked for.

What a faggot. No wonder you little bitch pussy swedes cry and throw medals away and the Brits named turnips after you.

lmao at all you hill billys

literal definition of beauty right here

Attached: fit 3.14.jpg (1080x1349, 324K)

Only played goaler in street hockey lad.

I'd let her do some squats on my penis is you catch my drift

>heels lifting
shit form, would not bang

I don't understand. Women want to be equal, why don't they let them check and throw hands when they want to?
It would make women's hockey interesting, why are they against that?

The same reason everyone posts shit about their private life. Attention.
Seething Canacuck

Attached: canacuck.webm (960x540, 2.94M)

>tfw the good guys are already through 1st round

this gril would absolutely beat the shit out of every lad here

Wonder what she smells like after a long workout

You spend at least five minutes fingering the girl while trying to maintain your errection, then lube up, and then be patient while trying to get your dick in without causing her too much discomfort. Once that's done she'll stretch out enough that you can both awkwardly thrust until you figure out how to move in unison and then, depending on how experienced you are and how long it took to get your dick in, you ejaculate into her after somewhere between thirty seconds and five minutes. Go back to fingering her while your dick recharges, and repeat the process without as much difficulty as now she's loose. Remember to stay hydrated and for fucks sake put on fresh bedsheets beforehand.

maybe it has something to do with money. these leagues barely make enough money to pay the players and they dont have medical teams or proper insurance to take care of injured players. these bulldykes usually have to work a fulltime 40 hour job as well, they cant really afford to get hurt for a few weeks at their weekend hobby.

Sure thing Rutabaga. Go fap to your blocky waifu's engorged clitoris

Attached: ShamefulBarrenBassethound-size_restricted.gif (444x250, 2.64M)

>t. twink who never been to a gym
90% of males in /hoc/ would absolutely destroy her if it was a lfe or death situation. Males has 40% more upper-body strength naturally.

>she will never beat you up
Why even live

That seems difficult
What benefits does it have over just jerkin' my gherkin?

I don't believe that. Hardos throw hand hands and hit at beer league all the time.

>put on fresh bedsheets beforehand.
I think you mean after. Why on Earth would you change your sheets right before soaking them in all manner of disgusting bodily fluids?

You can produce children if you want. Beyond that all the BS that comes with having sex isn't really worth something that feels marginally better

like imagine if that tj oshie injury happened in dykepuck. that bulldyke would be completely out of work until her collarbone heals. would probably even have to pay some of the medical expenses out of her own pocket too.

Attached: Q4Q0087-1.jpg (2000x1333, 1.22M)

I cant help but notice she didn't wash my pucks AGAIN

Attached: 1489711603579.gif (359x371, 405K)

sounds laborious. is it worth it?

>had a boner for super pretty girl in high school.
>look her up in 2010
>looks like an ugly crack whore

Jesus Christ, it was only a few years, what the fuck?

there is a 15% chance it will be called rape as well

It feels better and improves the relationship. Getting head is the best in terms of time invested versus how good it feels, but the second ejaculation in vaginal intercourse feels best imo.
I change the bedsheets both before and after.

i also think its like this user said. look at dykepuck at the last olympics. the japanese dykes didnt even weigh like 100 pounds. the north american bulldykes would btfo all the petite yuro/chink womyn.

IT'S UP
youtube.com/watch?v=XaYx4FVtS3E

Attached: the wall1.jpg (500x497, 59K)

Imagine not being able to skate
Imagine not having fucked up teeth.
Imagine never playing hockey, and then coming to /hoc/ to post about it like you're an expert.

I played goalie so my teeth are fine.

No form of payment, no pot of gold will satisfy the debt of what he's owed
Spilling from the houses in a trance the children lined up on the road
Cursing at the piper as he lured your kids away
And led them to the river for what was their final day
No need for convincing on his pipe he played a song to fool them all
Fooled them all!

Attached: AR-309119677.jpg&MaxW=1200&Q=66.jpg (1200x789, 73K)

pusy faggot has never taken a hit before

Attached: CG2lkW5W8AAZt6r.jpg (768x1024, 147K)

what a fucking dork

PUT ME IN COACH

So that is what a hockey version of a full kit wanker looks

What do we call these wankers?

Not all of us had rich parents. I got put in baseball which cost 24 dollars and I hated baseball. Still do. Begged to play hockey, but never. I also was the best player almost every time we played street or gym/ball hockey and most of my opponents were in real hockey since they were 4 or 5. wasted talent. Now I'm a cook making nothing can't afford shit and posting on Yea Forums. Thanks mom and dad.

3 on 3 dream matchup

MacKinnon - McDavid

Makar

v.s

Jack Hughes - Auston Matthews

Quinn Hughes

be worse than shea weber

>Mike Smith .917 Sv% when he's let in 17 goals over 5 games
What a piece of shit effort from the team defense. I would demand a trade if I was him.

heiskanen has looked pretty solid this season tbqh

Attached: 1510520797988.png (627x800, 334K)

>I also was the best player almost every time we played street or gym/ball hockey

gym hockey does not translate at all to ice hockey so if you're assuming you would be good at it just because of that you're a retard and its not your parents fault the peak of your potential is a cook

why has alberta been so bad this decade

The only good player of these are MacKinnon you dunce.

I only did Canada and USA.

Finland would probably be

Rantanen / Laine - Aho

Heiskanen

>this decade

Attached: puckyou.jpg (236x274, 14K)

but they played actual hockey for about 11 years, and I would consistently destroy them. That's got to count for something.

lol no

Barkov - Rantanen

Heiskanen

lol no

Unironically it is all Uncle Gary's fault. If he hadn't "grown the sport" and spread talent over 32 franchises, talent would be more consolidated, older teams would have won more, and Canada's cup drought would never have gone on for this long.

>I got put in baseball
if this is true, i feel sorry for you.

It really doesn't. If anything you had an advantage by only playing floor hockey and the ones who played on ice had to adjust from what was natural hockey to this weird shit that doesn't behave at all like on ice

yeah yours is better

lol

Simply epic

Pretty much everyone gets put in baseball as a young age. Its cheap, it keeps the kids involved in something, they aren't at crazy risk of hurting themselves and if they're any good it can open doors for them. Most kids quit baseball when they realize how boring it is, and ask to be put in a different sport or maybe do some bullshit like theatre or band.

My parents put me in baseball. I insisted on playing catcher because I was sick of standing in the outfield doing nothing all game, I might as well be in on every pitch. I got good at it too but ultimately it was so boring I just couldn't stand it anymore.

Ice hockey players played street hockey every day though...
Maybe not for people born in the 2000s like you, but they did.

Carolina Hurricanes? More like Carolina tropical depressions lelmao

Oh you’re right user, those meaningless floor hockey games you played are proof you would have made it into the Hall of Fame had your parents simply put you into the sport

its reddit

Don't shit on street hockey. It's fun, especially with roller blades.

Lol wtf are you talking about? All good hockey players are good on the street. It's not like if youregreat on ice you suck on the street. Fucking mongoloid. You must have finnish blood in you.

>You must have finnish blood in you.
Thats over the line Sweden

Why is ice skating so hard bros?

I had almost perfect aim. Something the other players didn't have. They shot most shots right at the goalie. And they were manlet spoiled shits that got to play real hockey. The final nail was when my feet started to grow rapidly. went from size 7 to 13 in a few years, and dad said that they can't afford skates every year even though they were buying them used. Yet they were buying shitloads of liquor every day, which is insanely expensive in canada

I’m not, I’m shitting on this retard who thinks because he tried way too hard at floor hockey due to his insecurities he would have been in the NHL and blames being an abject failure on his parents for not paying thousands of dollars to put him in a specific sport.

Enjoy some poverty hockey.
youtube.com/watch?v=BFCTOeUoVUM&fbclid=IwAR2gb_xF9D5Z0xx1x2cTP5sFFhh1WXg1Ed0l7YoddxTeqPxfYfFJG4MiPy0

Yeah man, you would have won the Richard trophy every year if it weren’t for your fucking parents

rph

Attached: 1549785683843.png (799x393, 27K)

i dont know my dad taught me how to skate as soon as i could walk

> he tried way too hard at floor hockey due to his insecurities
I like how you just make shit up.
I'm sure you are the one with insecurities because you were a spoiled shit who got put in hockey and gave up because you got hurt, while people with actual talent get thrown aside. You probably are five foot five as well.

>Australian hockey
Is this professional?

It's our major league, but it's semi-pro.

better than dykepuck

I'm not saying that, retard. I'm just saying I had wasted talent. I'm sure I would have made a wage in a juniour league. Definitely not the NHL. But I'm just saying wasted talent, while manlets who suck incredibly got to play hockey from 5 to 18 because they had rich parents.

Completely unnatural movement pattern. The older you start to learn too the harder it is because your brain doesn’t set pathways as easily. That’s why you’ll never see an NHL player who learned to skate older than 5

I’d probably drink a lot if you were my kid too

Yeah sure thing frycook you would have been elite because you styled on some kids who don’t give a fuck in street hockey.

Took about 300$ to get a set of used equipment. Shoveled snow for cash to get it.
You don't have any initiative.

watched some last year, it was fun.

Attached: 1535871067467.webm (1920x1080, 2.29M)

Attached: 800px-Munson,_Audrey,_Miss,_with_Buzzer_the_cat,_portrait_photograph.jpg (800x1051, 102K)

>Guy who works as a cook and blames his parents for his failures has no initiative
Shocking

Yeah, it's a bit of a laugh. Sadly it's the only hockey I can actually go and watch.

I was a pretty good goalkeeper when we played soccer in gym class I totally could have played in an English lower division or maybe Serie A or something

is this you?

Attached: 1535873009998.png (1082x718, 1.28M)

>nsw pleb teams

Islanders fan here

Attached: d1czbb-a9ea45e4-55b2-4db9-a1d5-146346dc548e.jpg (737x479, 25K)

you scared, /hoc/?

Attached: 1505903981803.jpg (619x563, 80K)

I graduated one of the hardest courses at Nait that promised easy jobs once graduated and at least 50 grand a year. Dad tormented me every single night. I went literally a week without more than an hour of sleep because the course was so hard and he would stay up all night stomping on the floor and randomly bursting through my door in the middle of the night. That creates extreme paranoia, so I rarely slept while I was taking one of the hardest courses at Nait. No jobs, and all the boomer bosses required five years experience for every job. Only five graduates got jobs. They were about 25K a year. Only experience I had was cooking. Sorry I'm not a NEET who has never worked a day in his life like you. Pic related... it's you

Attached: soi.png (644x800, 15K)

Are you? If Burns stops playing like a literal ass Sharks will steamroll you

Attached: erik-karlsson-3-092818-getty-ftrjpg_1si4dcvjcwden12gvf022lt2i8.jpg (1920x1080, 222K)

Aside from the Laffs I’m not actively rooting against any of the teams left so no.

nice blog post, faggot

I'm rooting against both the >laffs and the bruins.

>Northern Alberta Institute of Technology
>Alberta

It’s all starting to make sense now

>my wifes son and i are so excited our bing bings made it through to the next round! do you know what day the next round starts? my wife wants to know so she can plan her date with d'quan.

Attached: 1546572473714.jpg (1094x1600, 95K)

>Dad tormented me every single night. I went literally a week without more than an hour of sleep because the course was so hard and he would stay up all night stomping on the floor and randomly bursting through my door in the middle of the night
You must realize that your dad is a fucking retarded psychopath, right?

Attached: 1453753647926.jpg (500x500, 53K)

My disgust for the Laffs has made me forget about Boston, I’ll root against them as soon as they eliminate Trana.

>weed lol

Attached: pathetic.jpg (800x450, 34K)

Yes, and I'm glad he's dead. He died too late though.
Way better than marxist indoctrination camp U of A

>used to play hockey
>played street from time to time just to mess around
>smelly poor kid would always ask to play
>his parents were the town drunks
>we let him play out of pity
>he would always try hard and brag about how good he was
>jokingly say he could go pro
>I think he took that to heart
>last I checked he was working at wendys as a "cook"

>Alberta

I'm the guy you're mocking.
kek'd.

Petroleum engineer?

Whats your team m8?

God bless america
God bless hockey
Fuck the sunbelt
And Fuck the Leafs.

Attached: 8BA1A231-2D07-4479-92FB-434047BF4EB2.gif (360x346, 170K)

it's up
youtube.com/watch?v=XaYx4FVtS3E

ha i remeber that one. Huge hit and everyone on /hoc/ was talking about it at the same time

lmfao, oh dear god.

We know

do you lads ever have an uneasy feeling of impending doom?

Would be funny if you had a different flag.

Big blonde beauty Brock
Blasts based bardown burger bombs
Bloats BC's big bulges

Lads...............

Attached: 2019-Stanley-Cup-Final-Matchups.jpg (188x213, 14K)

Attached: pacific2021.png (799x393, 5K)

Actual kino match up.

Canada would rather face the rake than cheer for another city. Sad.

Attached: file.png (554x502, 292K)

Good, need to be able to laugh at yourself

>college
>hard

Life is hard for midwits like you. I'm sorry.

>its up to toronto
lol good luck with that.

>sad
did you cheer for america when the pongs won back 2 back?

Liked +1

Of course.

sure you did

Only cheer for >my team. You won't catch me with that cuck shit

Thoughts?

Attached: 1514602518538.png (1109x1100, 109K)

it's literally the worst meme on /hoc/. canadians team hate the fuck out of each other

Not really a /hoc/ meme. It's a stupid thing pushed by the media and casuals jump on it

Melbourne Ice.

Attached: 1555192434630.png (540x540, 247K)

yeah but /hoc/ should know better, that's why it's a meme
>cheering for the fucking laffs just because muh canada

Letting american teams fuck the trophy named after Canadian governor is the cuck shit.

pretty sure this is a canes fan starting this shit as always. shouldn't you be asleep? or at least wait until the east coasters wake up to start this shit since you love doing it so much

For me its the Sydney ice dogs

Attached: ICE DOGS.jpg (480x480, 20K)

Made another thing for /hoc/:
>youtube.com/watch?v=IblW9Rpkqqc

Attached: 1540258290588.png (623x625, 474K)

>asking canadians show more national pride than regional pride is starting shit

Attached: disgusted2.jpg (300x400, 27K)

Would Rags fans cheer for the Isles because they’re from the same city? What about Flyers fans cheering for the Pens because they’re from the same state? How about Kings fans cheering on the Knights because they’re both from the West?

Simple as

SSSSSSSSSCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Meme goal.

it's not a thing, dumbfuck. canadian teams hate each other, the only team anyone is neutral on is maybe the jets

>pretty sure this is a canes fan

>not mentioned once
>must be behind it somehow
>yfw Canes fans are /hoc/'s "the jews"

Not the retard arguing with you, but I thought people were more neutral about the sens because they were so irrelevant.

>National pride
This isn’t the national team though. These are regional teams whose fanbases all hate each other’s guts. Especially Toronto, the most hated by far. They don’t want to see their rivals succeed.

I was neutral on the Jets but now that the feel good sheen of Wienerpeg getting a team back has worn they’re starting to irritate me

based

>own goal
Just terrible.

Why? Neither America or Canada are real countries. It shouldn't matter. Everything is fake and manufactured where you live.

Don't worry, lad. The Blues have taken care of them.

Attached: Surface-to-Air-Missile battery.png (898x721, 1.3M)

:^)

it was 6-3

Thoughts?

Attached: 2019 plof.jpg (1109x1100, 92K)

>shitting the bed in the last minute

Terrible.

retard

Attached: 169c7a56.jpg (780x1008, 143K)

It’s not a matter of “these other teams are in the same country as me therefore I hate them” it’s years of rivalry, media bullshit, fan animosity etc, but I wouldn’t expect a Turnip to understand sporting culture

just jumped off the Jets boat, what a gay team
Laine should be sent to AHL

move >us down an inch

Attached: Broon juice.png (377x330, 9K)

At least they didn't put the Finnish bust on the cover

i'm sure toronto and montreal hate them a bit just because they share conference. it's easier to be neutral with the jest because they're still relatively "new", no canadian fanbase has a reason to hate them so far

The difference is that most american fans rival one team. Canadian teams rival the rest of the country. The way playoffs are currently set up there is no reason for a canadian to not to root for a canadian team from another conference other that autism.

Why does everyone think the Bruins are the bad guys?
>We have been protecting the rest of you from the leafs and habs for years.

He didn’t play for them when that issue came out

Based Ice.

>sporting culture
>North America

Attached: 1489686015520.jpg (629x800, 133K)

Boston sports teams are always the bad guys. This is a fact

dirty
jack edwards
the tranny posting didn't help

They're not dirty.
Jack is a homer, but he's funny and entertaining.
Tranny's are degenerate.

take the badguypill

Attached: pest.gif (390x220, 930K)

i don't really care for them either, but i don't hate them. it's funny shitting on laine, though

>Lucic
>Horton
>Marchand
>Chara
>Thornton
All literal cocksucking faggots who loved to play dirty and jump anybody who laid a clean unto a Bruins player. I'm so fucking happy Horton fucked up his back and that Lucic is completely worthless and everybody in Edmonton hates him.

Marchand and Chara are goons and should be mugged. Otherwise I don't really have anything against the bruins.

I guess if you chalk any reason you arbitrarily don’t like up to “autism”.

>Laffs fans are insufferable faggots, they get shoved down your throat on a daily basis, the league caters to them at every opportunity and their team is full of unlikeable pricks like Jihadri and Bustlander but they’re not in the same country so despite the media trying to force Toronto cock into your mouth whenever it can you aren’t allowed to dislike them because they don’t play in the same conference as your team.
If anything is autistic it’s this

So you hate the Bruins because of a player that isn't on their team? Makes sense.

Based ratman

Attached: 1541740760077.jpg (924x537, 62K)

Yeah, Jack Edwards and the Finnish goaltender meme. Rask has gotten way more praise than he deserves, being the biggest goalie choker this decade.

Chara and Marchand have been clean this year.
This fucking guy is still whining about Lucic hits that happened 10 years ago.

I don’t really like Scheifele but aside from that I’ve got no issue with the team itself. It’s how obnoxious the fans are. They had their team relocated and can’t sell out their tiny building in the playoffs but they love to cheer and pat themselves on the back about how they’re the best fans in the league. They’re the >Us 12s of the NHL. Part of me wonders if they do it out of fear the team might get taken from them again

back in 2011 most of country was cheering for the ruins over the canucks. even o6 rivals like the hasbs/laffs wanted them instead.

>stop hating a team just because they trade away some players

Attached: 1453181330961.jpg (300x300, 23K)

I used to despise Marchand for being a dirty cunt who tried to injure other players, but he's unironically turning over a new leaf and becoming a better person.
Now if he can just go a full year without licking someone, he will have truly reformed.

Attached: [lick].png (423x500, 465K)

>Rask has gotten way more praise than he deserves
He gets roasted daily, you don't know what you're talking about. Sorry.
You're whining about lucic who has been relegated to one of the worst teams in hockey.

>giving people second chances
And here I though Americans were violent, had revenge and an 'eye for an eye' mentality in their blood...

Truth be told

...

Will you guys watch low test russian cucks getting humiliated by High Test American Men today? It's going to be beautiful.

business idea: don't make a new

As I said, I don't stop hating a team just because they trade away players. They also gooned their way to a Stanley Cup.

show me on the doll where marchand touched you.

Attached: 2c0192d47c23f6a446ae5c81c53d10c7.jpg (477x640, 51K)

Tripp Tracy

also, as much as I don't want to encourage tripfaggery, why the fuck isn't there a trip named Trip Tracy

you sound like a whiny cunt tbqh.

Even the most autistic generals on this website understand that reaching the bump limit doesnt automatically necessitate a new thread

I doubt any Russian ahtlete are low test when your country are pumping everyone full of steroids.
>like my team LIKE MY TEAM
No. Fuck the Bruins, Bruins suck

>average jets fans

Attached: jets fan.webm (720x908, 1.45M)

Imagine typing this out in an attempt to save face after being called a cuck

For me, it's still being an atheist but realizing that the Christian tradition of forgiveness is what helped the West survive for so long and experience millennia of relative prosperity, by reintegrating outcasts and former enemies into society in order to keep working cooperatively with them instead descending into purity spirals and having society eat itself (like it's doing now).

Hockey.

Attached: sepe.png (384x384, 297K)

Who let you out of your cuck shed?

Why doesn't Vancouver have Asian-Canadian players? I mean there are soo many asians living there

Goodnight /hoc/ going to go be the best fry cook I can at wendys.

night budy

Chase your dreams user. I'm also going to bed, its 4:20 and I don't want to end up like the jest fan in

WHAT the fuck have you lads done with /cric/?

At least that monkey hasn't been cut in half yet.

Who?

wow talk about irrelevant

Attached: lmao.png (1842x111, 8K)

i got them autosaged again, of course

/cric/ got legit shook up from the shooter so a lot of them stopped coming to Yea Forums desu

lmaoing @ this cuck for being wrong

500 posts later

Is Mackinnon the most powerful skater in the NHL?
In 15 years when Canada is Chink majority, half the Canadian national team will be asian manlets

>Puljujärvi is a big winger who combines size, skating and skill. A strong skater who can blast past the opposition in full speed.

Attached: 1512934430997.png (358x394, 157K)

the team will still be made up of strong prairie farm boys, good ol ontariah kids, and generational maritimers not citycucks

I feel so bad for Canada. An entire calendar year down and now you have to cheer for the leafs. I cry a thousand tears.

None of those people will be able to afford playing hockey in your new chink economy
>Oilers scout report
grim

they will have drive and determination like poor apehoop/povertyball kids

Good point ice time would probably be like 50 bucks for a crowded shitty hour

Playoffs 2003, Senators-Flyers
>Zdeno Chara, 26
Zdeno Chara, 42

/tg/ knows whats up

He's coming home.

Attached: he's coming home.jpg (401x516, 118K)

Does my american frens not have the day off tomorrow?

Attached: Påsk.png (420x420, 17K)

With all due respect I never thought much of Sami as a player ever

chara played 4 nhl seasons before jack hughes was even born

Chara has a good reach and defense is a cerebral position. More cerebral than goal.

New

Maybe cuz I've lived there the entirety of my life

Be better than his joke of a goalie brother

Fuck that.