/hoc/

should I click it?

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>Igor Eronko
>@IgorEronko
>Replying to @SinBinVegas
>Talked today to Gusev's first coach Gennadi Kurdin, who's in constant contact with Nikita, he thinks Gusev will join Vegas

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A lot of people don't realise this is how big the clitoris actually is. See those "bulbs"? They are like your penis in that they engorge when aroused. No matter how big your dick is, you won't make your woman cum if you haven't engorged her bulbs.

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wtf gross im gay now

i used to please women all the time

can I have one of the tickets if you win?

who?

/hoc/ chads always engorge the bulbs

so it turns bright pink when engorged

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It’s a bush’s baked beans ad now
so no

thinking bout bulbs and getting pucks deep

while trying to find the source of one of those girls from the last thread found this pic

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thinking about picking bulbasaur first cause u know bulbs

looks like the Memphis Grizzlies logo

thinking about LED bulbs

>not squirtle
grim

dammit

>coyle to broons
i guess laffs are getting btfo again

>anything but charmander
hello gaybois

It could happen. Bruins shot up to 3rd in the league tonight, and are 1 win away from being 2nd in the NHL.

reminder

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this. why pick a turtle or some weird plant thing when you can pick a dragon. the choice is obvious

reminder of what?

can't wait till merkley is ready desu

reminder of quinn hughess. for reference, pettersson was at the top of that list last year

bulbasaur was unironically the best pick pick from gen 1 to 3(red, blue, firered, leafgreen), dont know about other gens

*sniffs*

*gets pink eye*

>OHL
it's gonna be a bumpy ride

having a hard time falling asleep
with all these hockey related topics in my head

sleeping is so easy I can do it with my eyes closed

Third day of no fap I just realized. What is wrong with me.

Second cup

funny, today was my 3rd day as well but i gave in

I would have challenged you but since you budged

Rookies

i'm trying to last for a week to break from my usual 3 times a day pattern that seems to have grabbed a hold of me for a year now

Can't do more than 3 days of "nofap"
But when I'm busy with Exams, uni and workout, I can usually go a week without even thinking about it.

i've done 4 before, had the fattest nut. i don't want to be a no fap incel though, i just want to limit myself to 1-2 times a week

>no fap incel
kek

how many days of norape are you on?

they quite literally believe never fapping will give them all the confidence in the world, but it doesn't matter anyway since your body will end up ejaculating excess jizz through wet dreams. it's much healthier to fap, just not 3 times a day like i'm used to doing desu

nofap is a meme anyway. Noporn is where it's at.

great hockey discussion you retards

great hockey post you retard

for me, it's getting the fap out of the way first thing in the morning.

for me its fapping only after >my team wins

Have you tried fapping to normally dressed girls?

i dont even watch hockey lmao

GUESS WHAT

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this but unironically

soon?

>needing to no fap

I'm honestly too much of a wageslave to have time to fap. On weekdays I usually just rather sleep than fap/vidya/hokki or something similar.

Is it normal for a family to go out, as a group, all wearing the same thing?

Was it wrong of me to photograph these people? I just thought it was odd.

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They're not wearing the same thing?

Comfy has a very positive connotation though while boring is universally negative

Damn, I had no idea it extended underneath the skin like that. Imagine the pleasure of your dick magnified times 2 then focused on a tiny clit and the bulbs and tendrils worked into your nether regions. Combined with no refractory period and multiple full-body orgasms, it's obvious who has the superior sexual experience between men and women. And we're the ones who have to work to get laid. What is this world

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that's why it's a code word

Hi

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I'm the first one up

Based fellow streetshitter.

...

Wtf im starting hrt now

based

based

>non canadians liking hockey
are you a cuckhold? why would you like a sport dominated by another country?
we hate sports we're bad at, so why aren't you doing likewise?

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>we hate sports we're bad at
Then why do you like hockey

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I've personally celebrated winning the Cup 5 times. How many times for you?

BUUUURN god job rajesh

Why is Pacific division so bad, /hoc/?

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>he didnt play minor hockey as a lad

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SHOTS FIRED

Well done, Eastern Pakistan

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unironically looking to join an adult men's league at a rink near me
the first piece of equipment i want to buy is a solid pair of skates. any advice on a good pair of entry level skates lads?

Ranking Henrik Lundqvist’s Pads

Henrik Lundqvist just released the design of his new pads. But which set of his pads are the GOAT?

Every hockey player knows summer time is fresh gear szn. Henrik Lundqvist gave fans insight with his latest Instagram post, this time starring Lundqvist’s new Bauer Odin 2S leg pads that feature Lady Liberty laid in front of an NYC skyline with MSG’s iconic roof as the backdrop.

I’m going to need new shorts, Cotton.

In honor of Lundqvist’s sense of style, here is the definitive King Henrik equipment setup ranking, covering any and all pads ever donned by Lundqvist in his playing career.

Liking only sports you can bandwagon is pretty pleb dude.

5. TPS xCEED—regular season/Olympic setup (2005–06)

Kicking off the list, we’re throwing it way the eff back (Finland puck-handler pictured above is using a wooden stick!) to Henrik’s rookie season. Coming out of the lockout, Lundqvist took Rangers fans’ hearts by storm. It was a memorable season in which The King burst onto the scene in the NHL and won Olympic Gold with Sweden in Torino.

This setup was cool, clean, and most noticeably a slimmer leg pad set than some of the TPS pad sets that followed. We fell in love with Hanky for the first time under these bad boys.

In his rookie year, Lundqvist finished the season with a .922 save percentage, and was a Vezina Trophy finalist.

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4. Bauer Supreme TotalOne set/Winter Classic set (2011–12)

As an equipment nerd, when Lundqvist made the switch from TPS to Bauer pads in 2009, I was excited for the concepts they’d team up to create.

This set looked a lot like some other designs by Bauer, though Lundqvist’s set deserves extra points because he donned them during arguably his best season. In 2011–12, Lundqvist (career high 39 wins, .930 sv %, 1.99 GAA) ran away with the Vezina trophy, as The King shouldered the brunt of the load to help his team win the Eastern Conference.

Lundqvist also used a custom set for the Winter Classic that year.

“Briere in on Lundqvist…SAVE!” *fist pump*

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india is based imo

3. TPS R8 Response set (2008–09)

The final set of the TPS years. These bad boys fit as well with the Rangers’ uniform color scheme as any pads the King has donned on Broadway. The R8’s were MONSTERS—wide and long.

I sometimes wonder whether Lundqvist’s pad size and his dominating the league from 2009–2013 were the reason for the league’s leg pad size restriction—check out the five-hole coverage here, especially compared to some of the new leg pads.

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For me, it's Turun Palloseura pads

2. Bauer Supreme TotalOne Stadium Series set—Yankees theme (2014)

My favorite part about this scheme is the darker, navy blue. I’ve always thought these uniforms were criminally underrated (and also not worn enough). This design, obviously used because the stadium series was played at Yankee stadium, is peak Lundqvist style.

Creative and clean.

Yankees legends like Derek Jeter, Babe Ruth, and Aaron Judge would be proud.

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Sure pads are great but why no cup?

1. Bauer Odin 1S setup—Crown design (2016–17)

Maybe it’s recency bias, but this setup is far and away my number one look.

Like, it’s not even close.

Lundqvist opts to go with a lighter blue as the base color for the leg pads, and the crown design on the same 1S pad Lundqvist had been using all season long, minus the standard pro stock corner color design scheme.

Unfortunately, the crown pads weren’t enough to keep the Rangers from being bounced in the second round of the postseason, but hopefully moving forward King Henrik gets more and more creative with his equipment.

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stop

>tfw you posted a question that will now be ignored thanks to this swedish little faggots lundshit autism

that's gay. you're gay

I celebrate winning cups every year because every team has lots of canadian people on it

Reminder that Canada and India have won the same number of cups in the last 25 years. ttttt

>I celebrate winning cups every year

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Kaapo Kakko desu

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canada won the world cup of hockey in 2016

Never heard of her

kaapo kakko
more like
KAAPO KAKKA :DDD
HE GONNA KAKKA SOME GOALS XDDD

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funny cause our american friends never heard of her either
too busy get BTFO in the group stage by teenagers

IMO skates are the one thing worth spending the extra money on, get a good pair. you can get everything else cheap but a good pair of skates is worth the money.

I like Bauer skates, but everyone has personal preference. look up reviews online. CCM and Graf are good too.

>only shit teams today
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

>check winnipeg score sheet

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imagine being this ding-dong diddly booty blasted about not winning a stanley cup in 26 (twenty-six) years

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NHL wins aren't national wins. just look at the nationality of the rosters. The only national wins are in national tournaments, and Canada does great at those.

sick and tired of these anime faggot shork "fans"

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Yeah imma skip this recap video

>be matched with a goalie named findows
>he's good

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USA need finland sweden and canada to stack roster XD

no gold medal in olympics since 1980

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@91036154
won a gold medal last year m8, how bout you?

Shan't be

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Fun fact: 1 of the linesmen during miracle on ice was Dutch.

I don't count womens hockey because womens sports are gay

gebaseerd

Here's what it's like to be an American hockey fan:

Imagine you're in Japan, and you're watching a Japan-based basketball game. Every single player on the basketball court is black, very black, and clearly from Africa. Wide noses, big lips, long dreadlocks. All of them.
They hit long 3's, do 360 dunks and generally light it up and put on a show.
The Japanese man beside you says "Ha! See? I told you that the Japanese were amazing basketball players!"

You think to yourself "The players in the game are clearly not Japanese, and yet this man pretends that they are because they're being paid to play in Japan. He actually believes that Africans playing basketball in Japan makes Japan good at basketball."

and now you understand what it's like to be an American "hockey fan" who cheers for "American" teams and believes that it's an "American win" when Washington wins the Stanley Cup.

>hiding behind women
canada won a gold medal in curling
just about as relevant as dykepuck

So Canadians are niggers?

based

>faggot incel to ruin another great thread.

Can't wait to watch your suicide stream tbqh desu.

how can an incel also be a homosexual?

>leafs can't even make arguments without thinking about black dicks
Sad.

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big trade today

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Wholesome hockey right here.

werent you faggots trying to convince me that vegass is back?

you are the one who brought up penis Pekke

Duchene for Tolvanen+3rd

why didnt big eeli make a splash this season?

Granlund for Bulju

woah we don't use the n word on 4channel

>lose to Germany in olympic semis
>don't medal in IIHF
>out in quarters in WJC
Literally the only three hockey tournaments that matter and ONE BRONZE to show for it. Bravo

Here is my hot take: The Winnipeg Jets are not a good or complete hockey team. You can chalk it up to injuries if you want but there are glaring holes in the roster, poor lines that aren't working, a shit tier power play unit(s), goalies that can't stop a puck and an incredibly expensive d-core that doesn't know how to play defense.

They are getting out hustled, out coached, out goalied, and out shot damn near every game. They act like they already won the cup and gave up at Christmas, content to not show up for any team in the bottom half of the standings. If this is what our supposed depth is roster wise the Jets will get bounced first round by a team that is actually willing to put in the work, by guys who can actually bury a shot, and a coach who can adapt and alter their strategies and lines to make up for areas that aren't working.

Since Christmas the Jets are 12 wins, 12 losses, GF 71 GA 77. People can claim it's just a skid but at this point for a third of the season the Jets have been outscored and playing .500 hockey.

Here's what it's like to be a Canadian hockey fan:

Imagine your team not winning a cup since 1993 at the latest, if ever

why do americans celebrate cup wins for teams they dont cheer for?

very grim desu desu

fun fact: every Stanley Cup champion team in history has had more Canadians on the team than Americans

The same reason you breath the same air as others, even though you are subhuman

>Charlie Coyle to Boston for Ryan Donato and a 2019 conditional 5th round pick (condition is if the Bruins make the second round of the playoffs this season, then the 5th round pick becomes a 4th round pick)

based Paul Fenton

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why am i not allowed to celebrate american cup wins then?

I've watched my team win lots of cups though because I'm a Penguins fan

Based

2006 was our year.

and that was 13 years ago

shit, I just realized
now I have to root for the slewfooter rat in the playoffs so >we get the upgraded pick
ew

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It might seem insane to you, since you are a Canadian, but others would see this as ultimate cuckold move. Which is supposed to be bad. Which is why others are trying to convince you otherwise.

is 13 more or less than 25?

So, by your own reasoning, you are a finnish cuck?

IIHF and WJC are meme tournaments

Olympics >>> all those other whack tournaments

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still in the past
the leafs won a cup in 1967, its about as relevant as a cup from 2006

Why? the best player from Canada has spent his career there, and I live in Nova Scotia where he is from. The closest Canadian team to me is the Habs and I'm not French Canadian. Finland hockey fans pick the team with their favourite Finnish player and nobody calls you a cuck

Canadians are allowed to cheer for any NHL team because every NHL team has Canadian players on it

I haven't stated anything about cheering for another mans team. It may seem insane to you, but not everyone is a cuckold. You should leave your country sometimes, or commit suicide for better results.

You know that "choosing your team" is a meme right? No-one gives a shit about the teams themselves, especially the Canadian ones

post your skates pekka

this is unfortunately true

all the IIHF tourneys would be so much better if they were every two years at most

Why? Did you loan your own to some American dark-skinned individual?

finland is seething pretty hard this morning

keep cheering for "another mans team" Pekke you cuckhold

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is pk cia?

They need a move to shake up that stasis. Laine is a bust. Treat him like one. Myers is a slow dinosaur, and Vegass showed quicker guys can get it done in the back.

Move some of those comfortable guys in the room, and they'll wake up.

Every Olympic win is a Greek win, because they invented it.

Most /hoc/ posters are /noskates/

its an american with a finnish proxy

How come Marchand never fights but acts like a tough guy?

Marchand's not a fighter. He's a lover.

this
he even licks other players

Today and such

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imagine if the caps had traded away ovechkin just because he was going through a dry spell lol

Please name the point in Ovechkins career, that compares to Laines current one.

imagine comparing a finnish bust to Ovechkin

he's a rat
his game is to piss off the other team and throw them off their game/take stupid penalties to get back at him

he only had 32 goals in 2010-11 season with a month he only scored 4 goals
laine's dryspell may be a bit worse, but its comparable

Reminder that if you can't do backwards crossovers you can't skate

>a guy who won Hart and Richard in the last two seasons + 1 Art Ross had one subaverage season is comparable to a flegmatic, slow and uninterested youth who isn't going to win a personal trophy in his career

Couldn't we just ban these retards?

thank you for pointing out that ovechkin recovered from his low point and became a player worth recognition

patrik should take inspiration in the fact there is hope for him

Did you see him last night? He was a literal pouting child, looked uninterested defensively, and gave up after missing two shots

Ovechkin was elite before the slump, Laine hasn't had a single season without a major stepback.

You better hope he's not the next Cheechoo

i didnt watch the game, but it seems like he could use a confidence boost
its hard when his coach has no faith in him, even in at his worse ove managed to have over 21 minutes ATOI
meanwhile laine cant even manage 17mins ATOI this season and the last 5 games his average is ~13mins

the rest of the jets team wasn't exactly setting a glowing example either

How do you have faith in a player who spends his time playing video games rather than on the ice?

>a guy whos responsibility is scoring, isn't scoring
>sees his TOI coming down

I wonder why

And still they have 2 lines of better scorers than their "franchise player"

you take away his video games and manage the fucking player to be a professional

paul maurice is really the one at fault here
if a worker isnt productive, do you blame the individual or the manager?

If other workers are still competent, you fire the sub-par one and get better ones to replace them

>I wonder why
that was my point though, the caps never took away ove's ice time just because he wasnt producing
the one season he was such a defensive liability he was -35 with 79 points, but still managed over 20mins ATOI

who else on the jets is competent right now?
everything is about the players not the managers, when all the problems seem to be management related

>thinking that the TOI is the reason why Ovechkin started scoring again

lel

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explain to me pekka how you score a goal from sitting on the bench?

Take away a kids video games and they just sulk more

discipline is severely lacking then
again a management issue

how many goals did those better scorers score yesterday? the jets have been a mess since the start of february. laine has been doing badly for longer than that, but there's something deeper going on with the team, and that falls on the shoulders of paul maurice.

Explain to me, why a scorer who gets 1st line + PP duty and still isn't scoring for dozens of games, is expected to continue in those lines?

If he's not scoring on the ice, he should be replaced.

>only had 32 goals in 2010-11 season
we really do need to ban these retards

>why a scorer who gets 1st line + PP duty and still isn't scoring for dozens of games, is expected to continue in those lines?
when was the last time patrik played for the 1st line?
>If he's not scoring on the ice, he should be replaced.
should have told that to boudreau

I agree that the Jets are not in the form right now, but there are players who are way outperforming Laine. Scheifele is 3+2 in 5, Wheeler 1+3 in 5, Tanev is 2+1 in 5 (with comparable TOI)

i agree, lets start with you

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Guarantee management has told Maurice to not take away Laine's power cord

which could be perfectly true, doesnt change the fact management is at fault for the lack of discipline

>how you score a goal from sitting on the bench?
the bench is scoring about as many goals as he is, so maybe the bench's goalscoring ability will wear off on him

you should always match players with guys they can learn from

in what world does the bench have 25 goals in 60 GP?
"we really do need to ban these retards"

>when was the last time patrik played for the 1st line?
The last time he showed he earned that place
>should have told that to boudreau
Are you implying that Boudreau is better than Maurice because he played the reigning two time Hart + Richard trophy winner in his slump, compared to not playing a flegmatic youth?

I don't know, that bench was highly touted in the OHL, I'd give it a chance.

>25 in 60

More like 0 in 45

nice arbitrary goalposts pekka

the bench is a better backchecker too

im implying that you are only as good as your current performance
and even the great eight was shit for a bit, but no one cared

Says the guy touting that 25 in 60 is a reason to play a guy 20 mins a night

>collect powerplay meme goals against bottom feeding teams at the start of the season when goals per game are statistically always higher across the league because defensive systems aren't in place yet

laine and little will gel any day now

like i said earlier, you cant score from the bench
the less he plays, the less opportunity he has to score
>those goals dont count cause i said so!
its just regular season banter mate, who cares how the goals are scored
also, patrik scored 5 against the bloos in late november

I like how the bench is steady, it's got a good +/- and you can put it up and down the lines.

Were you born in January? Did you even see his game when he was playing in those top lines? He was shit and his decline of TOI is a result of it

Yeah, the shittiest team in the league at the time
So impressive

what is you point?
he was bad so he deserved to be punished, but at the same time its all his fault for not producing at the expected level with less ice time?
bloos werent even close to the shittiest team, nice deflection tho

The bench is all business, too. Sure, it'll go out to dinner with the fellahs but then it's back to the hotel for a full night's sleep and no fortnite.

when was the last time laine was happy?

My point is that he doesn't deserve more ice time on the production level he currently has and you should finally start to realize this yourself

Laine is a literal zoomer with lots of money, but much do you think he's donated to his favorite streamer?

>expect a player to score more
>limit his opportunity to score
>proceed to blame the player for not scoring
maybe laine doesnt deserve more ice time due to his production, at the same time he doesnt deserve to be blamed then for not producing at the level his expected to

*rescues you from certain death*

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Hes still literally getting top PP minutes and can only manage 2nd assists every 4 games. Considering almost half of his goals are on PP, his lack of even strength time shouldn't matter

ottawa better decide what they're doing with stone soon or the rest of the league will be left with their dick in their hand at the deadline

This is like speaking to a toddler.

The sooner you let go of your delusions about Laine's capabilities, the better it is for your mental health. Let it go.

Good doge

*gives you alcohol when you're trapped in the snow to make your impending death slightly more pleasurable*

There were 3 finns drafted in the top 5 of the 2016 draft.
Every single one was a bust.

the jets PP has been terrible overall, but Laine is on the ice with 4 other players
>This is like speaking to a toddler.
I agree, the amount Ive had to repeat myself to get the message across to you is astounding.
These arent my delusions about Laine the fact you think im that one that expects him to be on par with Ove's goal pace is beyond retarded.

Never EVER draft a fucking f*nn

It's just to warm you up a bit la

The fact that I have to respond to your argument with countering facts multiple times and you still just spout the same fucking thing is retarded. For the last time; he got the ice time you wanted and still didn't produce. If you still don't get it, apply yourself.

Also, you were the one who started the Ovi comparison, you absolute fucking retard

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>countering facts
which are those, that hes bad so he deserves less ice time?
obviously you never understood my original point then and i doubt you ever will
>Also, you were the one who started the Ovi comparison, you absolute fucking retard
right to show that a player can slump and yet recover if his ice time isnt decimated
never said anything about laine competing with his goal pace you made that implication yourself

proxy off pekka

all finns should hang

Well, is it true /hoc/?

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>katie strang
imagine considering hockey opinions from this woman

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A broken clock is right at least twice a day

wow
nice sexism, dude

id say the same if it was a man with zero professional hockey experience

I only listen to Cassie

imm sure you have said the same thing about bob mckenzie

She's smarter than Don Cherry

anally shattered canes fan is awake

bob at least played the game, and i do take his opinions with a grain of salt

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got 'eeeeem

>SSM men's league
so Bob's gay?

only three to five more weeks until he stops crying, lads

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Sunbelt is swimming in your head m8 let it go

>bulju will turn into a 60 point player at minimum once he gets traded
>absolute state of soilers development
>hoc overflows with bulju

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says the man who let an old disgruntled canadian live in head all night

bulju or laine?

pick a side

To Edmonton
Laine

To Winnipeg
Puljujarvi

Bulju becoming a 60 point player would kill the meme desu. He's supposed to be franchise player, or a bust for him to be a meme

its over
hes yakupov but worse

somehow i doubt it

He'll be in the KHL in 3 years prove me wrong

idk if pulju could handle being on a russian squad
such a sweet, loving boy
much more likely he returns to the SHL/Liiga

he can't even speak english
how will he manage with an angry russian screaming at him

by giving the bulju expression right back

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for me it's NOFX and mcd's coffee in the morning.

i remember when i liked faggy punk bands

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>Matthews for Giordano confirmed

>Laine for Yashin confirmed

for me, it's listening to edgy dsbm when my team becomes a dumpster fire

Here's a hot take: Puljujärvi for Matthews

Imagine bulju in Toronto
Imagine Matthews in Edmonton

Are >we playing today lads?

>I awoke
>Only to find their net empty
>And through the night
>So it seems I'm not scoring
>And now my dreams are nothing like they were meant to be
>And I'm breaking down, I think I'm breaking down

>And I'm afraid
>To play because of what haunts me
>Such as living with the uncertainty
>That I'll never score the goals to win
>Which would completely explain
>Just how I'm breaking down

>Someone come and, someone come and save my career
>Maybe I'll score on an empty net
>But now it's like the puck is taking sides
>With all the worries that occupy the back of my mind
>Could it be that fortnite will suffice?

THE TRADES GARY
I NEED THE TRADES

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Bulju for Nylander

can we all take a moment to laugh at the coilshits? i think they deserve it

Would serve that twink bitch right

>28th in the league
LOL
>rnh
LMAO
>ahl roster
ROFL

>Seth Jones is better than any defenseman on the predators
Jackets won the trade desu

>ryan numale-dorkins

Cringe
Hey at least ted didn’t win

Columbus will give you bob if you give Columbus pulju and RNH
Good trade TOO be HONEST WITH YOU MY FRIEND

No you need a job

twitter.com/10tv/status/1098069734510202880?s=21

He's not even good enough for that

looks like a wishbone

Stop lying.

Howard is better and Detroit NEEDS Bulju.

>What's the story, Wishbone?

There once was a man
A little old man
Who lived in Montreal.
With a kid and a car
And a dog and a house
And a teenaged daughter
With a seethrough blouse
Who liked to work and ballllllll
And her naaaaaaame was
Magdelaaaaaaaana

This is entirely false and you know it. I think it was a good trade for both teams, no winner or loser.

"My daughter deeeeeaaarrrr
Do not be concerned
When your Canadian daddy
Comes near"

smith pelly cleared waivers, that leaves a roster spot for washington to make a trade

My daughter dear
Do not be concerned when your
Canadian daddy comes near.
I work so hard,
Don't you understand,
Making maple syrup
For the pancakes of our land.
Do you have any idea?
What that can do to a man?
What that can do to a man?
Do you have any idea?
What that can do to a man?
What that can do to a man?

somebody please take bob and panarin from CBJ so the teds dont make the playoffs

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The little ole man
With the grubby little hand
Who lived in Montreal
Was drooling a bit
As he reached for her tit
And he said to himself:
"This is gonna be it!"
But the girl turned around
And said: "Go eat shit!"
And ran on down the hall.
Right on, Magdalena!

>DSP clears waivers

RIP sweet prince

Magdalena, don't you tease me like this
Right in the hallway with your blouse and your tits
If your mommy ever finds us like this
She'll call a lawyer, oh how mom will be pissed

DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH
DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH
DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH
DOODLE DOODLE DOODLE DUH-DUH DEE-UH-WAH . . .

that's racist

Who should my Avies trade for?

1st for duchene
they could really use a big body centre behind mack

The little ole man
Came home one night
To his house in Montreal.
He caught his daughter
In the blouse by the light
And he said to himself:
"She looks all right!"
And he reached for a tit
And grabbed it tight
And threw her up
Against the wall
(BLUE CROSS!)
Magdalena . . .

>he doesn’t want to see the jackets blow a 3-0 lead in the first round
It’s better for /hoc/ that they don’t trade them

they just beat the stanley cup favorite winnipeg jets so i think their team is perfect as is

hagelin for a 3rd

kapi

To Minnesota Wild:
2nd Round Pick

To Arizona Coyotes:
Mikael Granlund

THIS JUST IN
PULJU AND DRAISAITL TO COLUMBUS FOR BOB AND A 5th ROUND PICK

Oh fuck Duchene to the Preds

>perform even worse after taking on ANOTHER senator centre
kek

gotta admit these are some epic jebaits

Man this is the worst trade deadline since the Black Plague

poo

CAN I GET A STREAM

Just go outside, I'll bet someone'll piss on you

nice /cric/ meme colossal FAGGOT

las vegas right now

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is your mom driving? tell her i said hi

Your whole country is a meme

Stone duchene and dzingel for panarin and and werenski

nah it’s my coworker

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D E S I G N A T E D
E
S
I
G
N
A
T
E
D

go back to /cric/ faggot

This is Dylan Larkin. Say something nice about him.

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HAGELIN TO CAPS FOR 2019 3rd rounder and conditional 2020 6th rounder

THIS IS NOT A JOKE LIKE ABOVE POSTS, THIS IS REAL

he's no Gus Nyquist, but he's okay

good trade for the caps
hagelin is fast and good in the ploffs

Give me a pissless stream now fatty.

>tfw goose has never memed as hard as he did in 2013-14
it hurts bros

TRADE:

To Washington #Capitals:
F Carl Hagelin (50% retained)

To #LAKings:
2019 3rd RD pick
2020 6th RD pick (*conditional)

I called it

>hagelin is fast and good in the ploffs
why was he getting benched in pittsburgh then?

>missed the 6th and the salary retention
Might as well have said Kopitar for a bag of pucks you shitter

congratulations you read speculative twitter accounts like 50% of us

Sorry bro hagelin was garbage in his last 3 playoff seasons

because he was getting shutdown by the Caps, go figure

I think Finaldnd SUCKS

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Based

you're probably right, i was going off memory. i remember he was impressive at one point
but if smith pelly was able to do more than well in the playoffs in that locker room, you never know

YIKES

Hello yes I'm here.

he's a 4th line winger with speed, good on the PK
caps got him for next to nothing

for me DSP never had a role on the caps after wilson emerged as the better power forward
speeder wingers are always useful

Don't be rude to my Finn friends please.

Thinking about moomin soda

I mean Seth Jones is literally a top ten defenseman in the entire NHL and Ryan Johansen hasn’t scored 20 goals since 2014-2015 we know that the jackets won the trade

Finns are like women: literally incapable of understanding the bonds of fellowship. You may think he’s your friend, but that Finn conspires against you, looking out only for his own interests.

Say NO to Finland.

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Why do you people only care about cricket to the extent that you literally ignore every single other sport? With 1billion “people” in your country, surely you’d accidentally be elite at something else.

dubs and there's another trade today

Why do Americans keep asking the same question EVERYTIME?

They are aren't athletic enough to excel at anything else

dubs and staal for 1st round

>be India
>1 billion people
>only 9 gold medals
lol genetic trash

should have interbred them with blacks

what bad have we done to america today to deserve his wrath?

Is THIS why America has so many gold medals?

yes, that and michael phelps

No, we just aren’t poor

I'll tell you if you lick my smelly asshole

which one of you is shitposting on /ck/

Wait..isn't it against to rules to buy medals?

Wait, wait, Cole has been out because of the beating Wilson gave him? LOL

Maybe you should make streetshitting an Olympic sport. You could have speed and endurance events. Relays. The rest of the world needs PED's to catch up with you.

It was you wasn’t it?

no, i would never resort to advertising my own thread like a barbarian

Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena, Magdalena,
daughter of the smog-filled winds of Los Angeles,
I'd like to take you in the closet and take off your little clothes
until you are virtually stark raving nude,
spread mayonaise
and kaopectate all over your body
and take you down to Hollywood Boulevard
and we can,
we can walk down the streets
by the stars that say Jon Provost and Leo G. Carroll together, baby.

Imagine paying top dollars for a goon
The absolute state of Washington

>be Ukraine
>some post Soviet shithole with Africa tier economy
>still btfo India in medal counts
You can't make this shit up

Serious question, why is India so shit (I don't mean that literally)

i dont want to know then, but ill hate you right back then

i hate america now, no more friends

We can go dancing up at the Cinegrill
can't you see it: Frank Pernell and us, until dark,
don't you understand, my baby?
I didn't mean, I didn't need, I mean . . .
it was so hard for me . . .
I just . . .
I saw you standing under the Shell pest strip late last night,
in the light,
with your little nipples protruding through your little see-thru thingie,
and I just said:
'My god, my god, I gave my sperm to this thing!'
And now I just,
oh, you got me so hard, I just,
I don't know what to do, Magdalena, don't you understand?

passed my fitness test lads

what if I clean my asshole? would you lick it then?

Fine, but we're taking hostages. First we'll take Laine... wait...

penis inspection day is next, hope you've prepared

filled with indians

With all the resources you guys have, there's literally 0( ZERO) reasons for Americans to be THIS dumb. So, why are (YOU) American so dumb?
How do we make America better like Canada?

>tfw even north korea has more gold medals than you

not a franchise player

TRADE:

To Minnesota #Wild:
F Matt Duchene

To #Sens:
F Mikael Granlund
2020 5th RD pick

that would be amazing for ottawa

did it or did it not happen?

Everyone aboard Noah's vessel
said Jesus and put a boa into Magdalena's anus

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no tsn insiders have tweeted so I assume it hasn't happened

I know this might be a little hard to handle for newbies, but you can keep having sex after you nut, and keep going and nut again

people who tell you that you cant are full of shit. watch a cream pie porno. the good ones the guy keeps going, and going and going.

learn some nut control bro. what can I tell you.

ps, even if you are going it the old fashioned way, it sounds like you are done for the night after you nut once. Sad!

enjoy dying alone with regrets I guess

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

settle down pajeet, I know it's hard to deal with being an Indian.

Laine for Stone and Dzingl

Why would Wild take rentals? They're on track for a rebuild; that makes no sense. And Duchene would not sign with a rebuilding team, he wants to chase a cup

lmao why the fuck would wild do that? Duchene is older than Granlund.

matt POOCHENE will NEVER have a cup

There's absolutely no way this wasn't written by a 14 year old virgin

>hags to craps
whew was worried they were actually going after a good player

>why the fuck would wild do that?

>Why would Wild

sounds like a trade the wild would make to me

>shoring up bottom 3 and PK for literally nothing
Why not?

the wild got rid of fletcher and his terrible decision making

did they though?

So it's exactly what the wild do.
Of course, they know they need to rebuild so these half-assed rentals wouldn't do much for them.

>Duchene
>Cup chase

fenton's been doing alright so far

Fenton sucks even worse than Fletcher.

replacing one bad player for another isn't as good as replacing him with a good player

ICE

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Why can’t POOndia handle a little bit of banter?
>9 gold medals
Holy YIKES, that’s worse than >1993

Donato or 2nd round pick(50th)?

i bet underaged and if i lick it ill be turned into a pedo and everyone in hoc will think finns are pedos so no
laine who?

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>Douchene isn't even going to stay with Ottawa
oh ho ho ho

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Ew girls are gross

BULJU ON NHL FRONT PAGE

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idk about that
hasnt been enough trades/signings to make the verdict

Every study that's ever been done shows that Americans have the least amount of sex, with the least amount of partners, and the partners report the least satisfying experiences, and the numbers are all pathetic across the board for time spent having sex, frequency, and age of losing virginity.

No surprise this retort was written by a fat american. I'm actually surprised he managed no bizarre words from his over sized fingers mashing the keyboard in (impotent) rage

Based oppressive puritanical society

>Numbers suggest Staal, BULJU, Howard could be difference-makers for Stanley Cup contenders

even nhl knows the truth about soilers prospect handling

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>everyone in hoc will think finns are pedos o no
bit late for that

>left avs when they were shit to sens who were coming off missing the SCF by one goal
>wants to leave sens now because they're shit
He's the filthiest cup chaser

im da McDavid now
McBulju

only bidness connor :DDDDD

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the nords are having a catfight, /hoc/

why would you want to play for shit teams? Duchene did nothing wrong

WE DID IT, FIN SENPAI.

>96
so close

>420 posts
DUDE

Good players make their teams better

>shitbirds

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mcdavid

anyone else in hoc comb their butthair?

always gets in the way otherwise, especially when i poop, so annoying

maybe i should shave

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>Avs were complete shit with Duchene
>Now they're average
>Sens were good without Duchene
>Now they're shit
rmyt

duchene has made ottawa better, its the fact ottawa made themselves so much worse

>Avs were complete shit with Duchene
the avs at least made the playoffs with duchene, now they cant even do that

He said they make the team better and you proved him right
Can you imagine how bad the Oilers would be without him?

They just did it last year and they're chasing a WC spot again
What are Duchene and the Senators doing right now other than handing Colorado a draft pick?

>Avs did not make ploffs 2016-2017 when Duchene was there
>Avs make ploffs in 2017-2018 when Duchene leaves in november
>Sens make ploffs in 2016-2017 without Duchene
>sens don't make ploffs in 2017-2018 once acquiring Duchene in november
Noggin' is joggin' lads

Phlegms should make a move. Their window is right now.

the avs had the worst season in recent history with duchene as their 1c

New Business Idea: 60 minute straight hockey games. Meaning no intermissions but ads on uniforms. Also it'll be called the XHL.

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>What are Duchene and the Senators doing right now other than handing Colorado a draft pick?
lamenting the fact they lost karlsson
the season after he lead them to being 1st in the central as the number 1 c

>laffs

fighting is allowed?

It's not hockey if someone doesn't get heemed.

for who, bob? lmao

Ruins are going to jump for Nyquist.

They got the fever and are rapeable.

>only the loser gets a penalty

they need goaltending, Bob or otherwise, plus some depth

You're thinking of 2013-2014

>unironically using /hoc/ as a forum to discuss hockey
This place really has gone to shit, hasn’t it?

Do pooins actually believe they are contenders when they will have to go another 7 with the laffs?

Fuck off shitposter

i'm sure they are very scared m8

only reason it went 7 last year was because of andersen shoving a goddamn horseshoe up his ass

except the >laffs are rapeable too

>or otherwise
who else is worth going after

>not being able to beat andersen
We know the pooins and laffs are bad
But the pooins are going after players like they think they are contenders, when they won't even get a sniff of the PoW Trophy

>Had a fluke playoff appearance in 2014 thanks mostly to Roy's antics at coach, didn't appear again for 4 years
>"But Colorado was better with Duchene"
Really turning the cogs here

patrik laine

What a shit post

What a shit post

cry more you fucking dogs

patrik laine

>the virgin Laine
>the chad Aho

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What a shit post

takes one to know one

What a good post

Howard?

What an interesting post

>the virgin finn
>the chad bin

excuse me gentlemen

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privyet

sookie blatt

delete this. Barkov is in reality much cuter.

suka blyat pizda rasiya mudak

aleks barkov is elite

>losing 7(seven) to 1 (one) to bing-wahoovalanche
absolute state of the western conference

Pleas post Finns that are NOT busts. Thank you.

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>finns
>that are not busts

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pulju

>aho
>barkov
>busts
uk please you need to raise your hokki awareness especially with you now in WC 2019

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This just in: UK poster is a stinky smelly muslim with zero (0) hockey knowledge.

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UK has more olympic gold medals than finland and they will play in the next Skoda Cup.

Show some respect, yank fuck

>trading for former >rags
>craps

This just in: Sweden licks stinky muslim asshole and has zero (0) hockey knowledge

Behead those who insult Sweden

pukki

behead those who insult Finland

marchand fights sometimes

youtube.com/watch?v=PMYtA28pgJs

Absolute god.

Behead Finland AND Sweden

shes won me over too

I am hearing Granlund to Carolina for Kuokkanen, 1st and 2nd round pick

t.pro scout

/hoc/ is NOT for the following:
swedes
brown people
bootlicking american cunts
you

/hoc/ IS for the following
canada
finland
me

better than only 2 from the POO-SA

Finn's can wheel I'll give them that

/hoc/ is not for commie pinkos either

your sisters vagene to my kuokkanen on a free tomorrow

/hoc/ is for straight white men over 6'

if you're wondering whether you qualify, just assume you don't

Go away Mohammed

what about the mason dixon line?

obligatory

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Why is there no russia in /hoc/

He's a fucking retard don't listen to him.
Here are the actual qualifications:
>straight
>white
>north american
>male
>OVER 6'
>north of the mason dixon
>east of the mississippi

I would be willing to drop some of the qualifications and make /hoc/ just for straight white men. southerners are based

ELITE post my friend

if you live below 50 latitude then you're a sunbelter

Sweden has mild winters, you're sunbelt

we have no sun during winter you tard

harshness of winter is nothing
the darkness of winter is everything

>sweden is exactly 1 climate
retard alert

Snowbelt
>upper Midwest
>non coastal Canada
>Russia
>Finland
Sunbelt
>Everyone else

>pussy ass "nords" who experience barely below freezing weather replying to me
yikes

This just in: No one gives a shit

morning all

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Whaddup lad

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whiter than you hernandez

last few days at work have been shit and today is going to be no different, its friday though thank fuck.

hopefully more wild trades today.

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>outing yourself as a sunbelter
cry more.

Norwegian descended Minnesotan my brother :)

>norge licking swedens boots
Thought you were better than this lad

haven't seen her in a while

alright this isnt funny. wheres the new thread

cry for me some more you hairless dog

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ny/uutiset

You should make the Minnesota logos the exact size of the nipples