What's the worst pitchfork review ever written?

What's the worst pitchfork review ever written?

Attached: Capture.jpg (545x426, 61K)

They're all equally worthless and terrible, like the opinion of any reviewer.

Frances the Mute desu

>shit cat

John Coltrane
Live at the Village Vanguard: The Master Takes
[Impulse!]
Rating: 8.5
The Village Vanguard. New York City. 1961.

We was sittin' there watchin' the stage. Waitin' for the man they called Coltrane to come out and do his thing. It was me and my four droogs. Them bein' Peter, Georgio and Dim; Dim being really Dim.

'Round an hour'd passed and the place was packed straight through to the back. I'd just dropped some dollars for 'Trane's Giant Steps six months back. Now was the time, this was the place. The Village Vanguard. New York City. 1961.

I was only there for the first night, see, but them cats at Impulse! just made my life complete. They put out four CDs of all that sound 'Trane put out those nights. But you know my type, man. Can't afford to eat, let alone spend some heavy cash on music. So I only got the essential. Live at the Village Vanguard: The Master Takes is one disc, makin' it one-fourth the cost of the box set. And you only get the best stuff.

Man, the opening beauty of "Spiritual..." It's like a dream I had: I floated on the River Nile, smokin' some fresh weed, relaxin'. But I ain't ever gonna see the Nile anyhow. This track's as close as I come, and it's close enough. Best of the best, though, has gotta be "India." It's only when you listen to a perfect old jazz tune like this that you realize how much drum-n-bass is derived from this music. 'Trane takes it to heaven and back with some style, man. Some richness, daddy. It's a sad thing his life was cut short by them jaws o' death.

Shit, cat. It don't make a difference. The man produced enough good music to last me a lifetime. This Village Vanguard thing's just another example of the genius of Coltrane.

-Ryan Schreiber

awful take
Reviewers can be useful guidelines if you have the confidence in your own taste and the capacity to take others' opinions into account when appraising work. Plebs who hate reviewers are always insecure about their taste.

Franz Ferdinand s/T
American Idiot
The Fragile
Kid A reissue
Currents

On a lighter note, here are some of the best p4k reviews:
Emergency & I
Source Tags and Codes
Jimmy Eat World's Clarity (love this album, but the review always makes me laugh)
Bloom

>letting others opinions influence yours is a good thing!
Spoken like a true pleb.

Like I said, it's not like you HAVE to let their opinion change your own it's about seeing what other people take from albums and comparing experiences. If you can't read a review without it changing your opinion you're thick

Not pitchfork, but christgau is a tasteless cringelord as well

Attached: Screenshot_2019-08-18-11-08-18-837_com.android.chrome.png (1080x2248, 512K)

Dude, reading someone else's viewpoint is gonna subtly adjust your own viewpoint to be more in line with theirs. That's the whole point of advertising for example. When it comes down to it only you should decide if you enjoy a release.