Which one is the best music critic?

>Fatano is the best

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The dad from Crazy Family

Pretty easy objective ratings imo

Best:
>Scaruffi
has the most interesting things to say
>Antiwarhol
10k+ ratings and like only a handful of worthwhile reviews
>Fantano
reads a wikipedia article then chooses a few descriptions out of an array of a dozen or so possible adjectives
>Christgau
boomer lyric reviewer who likes 2 genres

Most Influential:
>Christgau
unfortunately obvious. People outside of semi-obscure internet groups actually care about hime
>Fantano
internet video-form music reviews were scarce before him, not really a huge genre anyway
>Scaruffi
who did he influence other than Yea Forums weirdos?
>Antiwarhol
see above except /rym/ people exclusively

>boomer lyric reviewer
lmao

I like christgau but this is true. I think *maybe* 20% of his reviews even talk about the music

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>Scaruffi
>has the most interesting things to say
>”It is a Zappa-esque track with cacophonous syncopated drumming and ethereal Bjork-ian vocals”

Shit thread not music fuck off

Critics don't matter.

>boomer lyric reviewer who likes 2 genres
R&B and punk.

>cacophonous syncopated drumming
This description alone has greater depth than is demonstrated by any of the other reviewers, which is pathetic.

>best
Scaruffi
>most influential
Christgau

yes

>most influential
>Christgau
Disclaimer: This is not a compliment

>Best
Fantano
>Most influential
Christgau

Human Clay [Wind-Up, 1999]
In the year that rock died again, what should come back to the front but metal, whether it's rape-inciting Limp Bizkit, party animals Buckcherry, or abuse-tripping Static X, and as Rome demonstrated, uglier than ever. For contrast, these God-fearing grunge babbies sound like they're still figuring things out. Since their songs address universals, they don't debase women--a plus. I mean, it's not as if familial abuse isn't real. So after years of Marilyn Manson lies, it's a relief that young bands have found a sonic space in which to breath. These guys however merely belt out regressive circumlocutions to drown out the truth inside. Which is, I don't know what. Maybe lust. C

The thing is that when scaruffi writes that the drumming usually isn't really cacophonous

There you go. No discussion of the music, just speculating on what the band members' beliefs and motivations might be.

The Big Come Up [Alive, 2002]
not Jimi yet, but fast approaching Stevie Ray ("She Said, She Said," "I'll Be Your Man") ***

Scaruffi: best taste, based and very funny
AntiWarhol: good taste but autistic
Christgau: awful taste but can be funny
Fantano: zero redeeming qualities

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I don't care if I'll get shit for that but out of these 4 I believe AntiWarhol is the most important one. He paved the way for a whole new generation of music enthusiasts, young people that step outside their comfort zone to explore art, something that wouldn't have been possible without him. That being said, I consider him the most influential one. Probably the best as well because he's genuine about his ratings from what I can tell. Scaruffi isn't all that bad either. Fantano and Christgau have no importance (to me) whatsoever.

top right

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this but unironically. he's influenced an entire group of young people to become avid music researchers, film enthusiasts and inspired them to grow an interest in art and philosophy. j_c decided to study anthropology because of him. karl's views on art wouldn't be the same if he hadn't discovered antiwarhol's account. raf aka heavyqt became interested in deleuze and hegel because of him. fractured went from being a run of the mill hipster to one of the most interesting people in arts today and a groundbreaking musician. hardboiledbabe is one of the most promising artists of her generation and has introduced experimental music, literature, and film to thousands of young women via her tumblr. all these young and coming people who are about to take over the art and academic worlds, thanks to antiwarhol.

I'm familiar with this copypasta, my opinion remains unaltered however.

>Best
Scaruffi
>Most Influential
Cringegau, but Fantano is slowly becoming more influential now that boomers are dying off.

>Music critics are perfectly useless. Just shape your own taste.
That's impossible. Even if you are not doing consciously you are still following a music critic. Might as well make the choice conscious so you know what you are getting into.

>Which one is the best music critic?
me
>Which one is the most influential?
me in the future

Lmao, they are basically three cucks and a virgin

im a better critic than all of them
my favorite albums are better

hi anthony, didn't realise you still came here

nothing personnel kid
youtube.com/watch?v=ZZAvd1OEIew

(also image searching "deep cuts" was a mistake)

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Best is Scaruffi because at least he has something interesting to say at times. Christgau is objectively the most influential.

kek'd

>virgin
Anti probably has had gay sex. Also, Scruffy is married to a loyal chinese qt

a conversation between these four would be so fucking epic

Like what?
>I think that TMR is the best album
>I respect your opinion, but I think that To Be Kind is the best album
>I respect your opinion.

best critic is scruffy
most influential is probably fantano

>Even if you are not doing consciously you are still following a music critic.
How?

It would probably just be a controlled conversation between antiwarhol and fantano. Christgau would be a smug asshole who wouldn't want to condescend to amateur reviewers and Scaruffi would wish he was talking about AI.

>no Lester Bangs
THE
ABSOLUTE
STATE

Based Rich.

The fewest words yet the most substance.

Tell me your top 10 favorite albums and I will tell you which critic do you unconsciously follow.

>Anti probably has had gay sex
Yeah, didn't think about that desu
>qt
She's ugly as sin but even then it doesn't make him any less of a cuck, all the few white guys I know who went for the chinks did it due to the absence of any other option, and in scaruffi's case she probably made out with him just for the green card

>Captain Beefheart? Too heteronormative and mainstream among the colonial white economies, not worth my time.

prindle god rest his soul

Don't do my nigga Scaruffi like that. He's above those plebs.

Christgau is the most influential overall but being the most influential music critic isn't really that influential. Fantano is the most influential among current music listeners. Scaruffi and AntiWarhols are literal whos

fpbp

I wouldnt say my taste is super unique or anything but I dont think I'm a [critic]drone
The Modern Lovers - s/t
Violent Femmes - s/t
Ween - Pure Guava
Iggy Pop - The Idiot
Animal Collective - STGSTV
Galaxie 500 - On Fire
Weezer - Pinkerton
Jonathan Richman - I, Jonathan
Big Star - Third
Codiene - Frigid Stars

Is AntiWarhol Asian or Latino?

He's native

Native-American/Eskimo

You drone rockist RYMers, either directly or undirectly.

Oh, which one actually knows music theory?

I'll wait.

even cuckgau likes the beef.

this is the creepiest photo of anthony I haveever seen

rateyourmusic.com/~PieScarf
rateyourmusic.com/~theneedledrop
rateyourmusic.com/~AntiWarhol

Is there one for cuckgau?

The guy on youtube who reviews nu-metal

why do people rely on someone elses opinion for their music tastes and what they listen to. what happened to making your own opinions?

antiwarhol isn't really a critic though he just rates things on a website

>(also image searching "deep cuts" was a mistake)

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this is accurate