Take a shit

>take a shit
>wipe
>paper is clean

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just keep some baby wipes in your bathroom or shave your butt

>itt poorfags that don’t use wetwhips and a bidet
I knew the people posting here were some dirty crusty ass muthafuckers walking around with dried poop on their butt xD

>wipe again just to be sure

>lick the paper just to be sure

>take a wipe
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>shit
>wipe's still there
>give up
music for this feel?

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What kind of faggot doesn’t wet the toilet paper after the first wipe? Are you a literal homosexual? Do you listen to trap? That or you drink estrogen-enriched milk from a particular pesticide-rich plant bean?

You guys need to think about a long-term solution. Pretty sure a better diet and exercise would help with this loose stool issue

Ikr. Only time my ass gets like OP's is the day after getting drunk

nah dude my hole is so tight it squeezes hard poos in soft ones. I don't get fucked by a big strong man every night at all cause that would make my hole not tight, which is exactly why that's not what happens

youtube.com/watch?v=oqS9KaEg_Xs

>hold wipe under ass
>take a shit
>catch shit in wipe
>shove shit back into ass
>wipe
>shove wipe into ass

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eat more fiber

fucking kek

>blood in shit
>get it checked out
>it's hemmorhoids, not cancer

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Did the doctor look at your hole
Thats kinda weird but still hot

I got a camera shoved up my pooper
it wasn't as bad as you would think

>take a shit
>don't wipe
music for this feel?

youtube.com/watch?v=ZiS2LZhLvYw

We need to fight climate change in any and every possible way.

Sloppy Seconds.

>take a shit
>feels like hearty one
>get up, look in toilet bowl
>nothing is there

Then your sphincter bites off the toilet paper and you have soiled toilet paper in your ass.

>take a shit
>take a shit

>take a shit
>not a clean pinch
>dig the rest out while wiping
>wipe ass until it’s raw
>30 minutes pass
>ass is itching like crazy
>wipe again
>it’s like i just took a fresh shit

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>take a shit
>eat it

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>going to take a shower
>think I might have to shit
>sit there, a turd or two plops out
>"I guess that's it"
>go shower
>get out
>dry off
>get dressed
>about ten minutes later that butt mud feel hits
>go to the bathroom
>take sloppy yellowish liquid shit
>too lazy to shower again

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Lucky you, I got a lubricated finger up my ass. I was dripping lube from my anus for an hour after that.

Here's a song for what I was feeling.
youtube.com/watch?v=ptPXxAds1Jc

oh, I had that too. single most painful experience of my life

shave around your asshole in the shower every couple of days and youll never have this problem again

Im sure you’re use to that feeling

with a razor? what if i cut myself. wont the hair grow back thicker?

Won't you get stubble that will itch like crazy?

hahaha a sad frog. Look! he's sad.

The best feel

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hair doesn't grow back thicker it just feels thicker because it's shorter and more stiff. If you don't shave for a couple days your asshole will begin to itch from the prickly hairs, but this is the price you pay for clean and hassle free shits. It's unlikely you'll cut yourself if you know how to use a razor. I've literally never cut the inside of my asscheeks in the years ive been doing it, but i have accidentally nicked my perineum, which seems to be the easiest place to accidentally cut yourself.

P.S. Only shave the inside of your asscheeks, not your ass itself. If you shave your ass and you have anything but the straightest and thinnest hair, you'll get ingrown hairs and your ass will be itchy for a week.

>giving up
>ever

i bet you smell horrible

That's.... not what that image is trying to convey. You might actually be autistic dude

Don't eat as much greasy foods.

Alternatively, if you do eat a lot of greasy foods, supplement your diet with soluble fiber. You should be doing this anyway if your diet is unhealthy because soluble fiber reduces bad cholesterol in addition to making shitting easier.

but he is sad.

I remember I did this and was late for school because I was wiping for literally like 20 minutes

>take a big shit
>think about how many squares are you going to use for that
>after first wipe it comes clean and you can use that same piece of paper as a napkin now

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Trick is to get in there REAL DEEP. Like you're digging to China. Make sure to multilayer your finger before scooping away or else you'll wind up ripping it and fingering your poopy asshole, making your already shitty time even shittier.

>take my daily shit
>take my daily shower immediately after so that i dont have to spend 20mins trying to wipe through all my asshair

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>he doesn't shit in the shower and stomp the poo down the drain

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>tfw drunk every day
now what

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Should I just use tongs to reach in there and clamp down on the poop?

>take a shit
>big turds come out pretty fast, but there's still some shit left
>spend 10-15 minutes gasping and grunting while spurts of piss spray onto the floor all for the effort of getting a few turd droplets out

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If that’s the case you might have to just shove toilet paper tampon in your ass crack not gonna lie it’s gonna melt like hot fudge when you sweat

Nah it's not necessary. See what happens when you wipe constantly and there's still poop is there's just a little bit of soft stool stuck inside your rectum still. It's mushy and soft so all you'd be doing with pliers (or whatever your preferred tool would be) is squishing it around and ruining your perfectly good tools.

You gotta dab it. Wet the paper a dash and dab around there till you don’t see brown

>not tucking your dick into the bowl to avoid this

>take a shit
>instant headache

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I love when this happens

>poop
>fishmans
>wet asshole

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I’ve been like constipated or something lately. My butthole had been normal and functional but I’ll be in a public bathroom and just give up because I’m just so unable to get into my break and take that dump and I make emberassing noises.

Gotta drink a ton more water and eat less fiber. Or more. This shit is ruining my life. Or lack thereof. As far as your problem related it drys up eventually. As long as you get 95% cleaner you’re fine.

I literally actually do this. You’re me.

This only happens if you're a female. They always have spotless buttholes