how do you bros pass drug tests if you use anything?
got some weed on the way and work electrical. haven't gotten a drug test yet and they only do it under suspiscion, but in case a surprise one comes, how do you guys usually handle it? i hear pickle juice helps
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I deal with it by not doing weed.
Then, when a surprise comes, I'm clean.
Imagine living in a country where employers are within their rights to drug test you.
Buy fake piss user, I know lots of people who use it
>this
>and this
>i hear pickle juice helps
Nope. There is nothing and I mean nothing that will shift THC metabolites from your piss. Buy some home test kits and test yourself and see how long say a joint takes to leave your system and then only smoke so much so often. If you smoke heavily and all the time you are fucked.
Nope. This doesn't work either, they screen for that too. If your piss isn't the right temperature or it looks too light or really dark you will fail on the spot.
So, every country then?
Nope, that shit would be illegal here in Norway.
Get the stuff it’s a drink that you drink the morning before a test and has never failed me and I use to smoke multiple times a day every day
Not smelling like weed helps. That shit stinks and a small bit of it can be smelled in a 30 feet radius. You can't smell it because you're use to it.
good fake piss has the right organic chemical composition and is kept at body temperature with a hot pack strapped around your leg. shit fake piss is shit but the good $30-$50 stuff is very discrete. werks every tiem
This is bad advice that will get people sacked and ruin careers. Smoke and be smart about it or don't smoke at all.
Sonnes, Bentonite Liquid No 7
Thank me later.
This.
Never failed me before
get a new job and openly smoke so you do somthing for society. Hiding the fact that your a functioning stoner just leave the nonfunctional stoners to represent us we get a bad rap because we are all scared. Just stand up smoke your weed and do 2x the work anyone does.
synthetic urine is the de facto standard way of passing a drug test. I've never heard of anybody being called out after using it, ever, let alone fired. the drink that the other user suggested though... I'm very sceptical but I don't have any medical backing for my position.
I've never tried it but everyone I've told this to swears it works. Forgot where I heard it. Take a cotton ball and dip it in a cap full of bleach. Suck on it then drink a gallon of water. It doesn't mask anything it just shows up as extra strange chemicals in the test and they throw it out as a faulty test because they think no one is dumb enough to drink bleach. Google bleach pill for more info.
Not debating just inquiring. What makes it illegal in Norway. Like what's the reasoning, privacy???
Are you fat? I passed a drug test by jogging like three miles uphill every day for two weeks, had something to do with me being a fat fuck but I don't know the exact science. Also took creatine and drank a fuck ton of water.
>implying you need to be drug tested to make wooden shoes for a living
I keep a 20ml syringe on me. you piss 10ml and water it down. If they are just drug testing it works. But if they are running piss tests and drug test they will see the k and phos are low and call for recollect.
Get a degree and then work an office job
kek
Yes, privacy rights. If you show up visibly intoxicated, that's another deal (you'll get sent home, you will get reprimanded and possibly fired), but the employer can't just do random drug tests, only government authorities (aka the police) can demand that. Basically, an employer have to report you to the police and they have to make an investigation in order to uncover drug use at home, and they don't do that unless you're working as a doctor or a police man or in the military/intelligence.
Quick fix synthetic urine. sold at a lot of head shops. works for probation even. 100% success rate
Need a court order.
You are asking the wrong question seen with Norwegian eyes. Why should an invasive act like that be legal? So, yeah, basically privacy.
lots of water and sweating :3
Norwegian lawyer here btw
I use this
Works every time
Bullshit useless snake oil. Stay stupid son.
Doing weed. What a fag
GET IN THE FUCKING CAR MORTY. WE NEED TO GET TO BENDIGO
OP USE THIS. I SWEAR BY IT
It's not.
I don't think you understand something. States that legalize have no power over private employers to force them to hire marijuana users. So go dig that ditch.
The only way is to cut your fat. THC or it's metabolites are store in the fat cells. So exercise. Drink plenty of water each day. And maybe only smoke when it's warranted, not like every time you have a spare minute. That will keep it really managable. Then if you get called in to test like tomorrow I would suggest the fruit pectin trick. It basically masks the thc in your piss somehow. Google "fruit pectin drug test" though because I'm too lazy to list the steps.
Don’t listen to these morons. I mean, first user is right. Agent X field kit dude. Comes with a hand warmer that will warm the piss to desired temp, and a bladder bag connected to a tube, with a strap & a little pouch you can strap to your thigh and run the tube under your dick. There’s even a temperature strip on the bladder bag. I’ve passed tests this way, even my girlfriend has and shes a nurse at a hospital. You’ll be fine. Just make damn sure it’s the right temp and you’re good to go. It has to contain a certain chemical which agent x does, I can’t remember what exactly it was but just look it up.
This is true.
Just get some dog piss for shits sake
Are you... retarded?
been doing this for years. i'm a nervous wreck every time i do it, but it has never failed me.
It is. An employer can't drug test you in Norway, it would be illegal and the company can sued for that shit.
>Dr. Green's Agent X
The hand warmer will keep it at temp for 8+ hours. Have used it many times.
If you’re an electrician, just self employ man. Advertise your services and get work and smoke all the weed you want. What a damn shame weed is treated like this though
Buying fake pee
Maybe I'm just too high but I have no idea what you are trying to say to me.
>dog champion of my underground dog combat association
>mixes meth in purina dog chow
>urine ckeanliness: quedtionable?
The odds are it will fail you next time. So keep a cardboard box at work to put your stuff in when you are fired.
Fake piss works every time. Just like the other user says, the only flaw is the temperature. You get a heat pack and DON"T crack it until you're sent for a test. You can't sit around every day with a hotpack on your leg. But you usually have an hour to get to the testing center, and that's plenty of time to get the temp right.
Employers in the end have final say whether they hire you or not. Regardless of whether or not you failed a drug test or passed.
Do what I'm doing, and quit. Nigga's wanna always try shit to pass a drug test, except quit doing drugs.
What is your job? I hope it's not mission critical work.
Norfag lawyer from Trondheim here. With a few exceptions, such as where military clearance is needed, it is illegal. Even cops can't do it without a court order - except where suspected DUI.
Your not too stoned my friend your dealing with posts of autism
Thats not true. Some places are drug-free workplaces and have randoms, because their liability insurance is lower if they comply with those requirements. Also, DOT jobs (which covers more than just driving a plow truck) are all mandatory randoms, in every state.
No shit dipshit that’s obvious and doesn’t relate to anything posted here
This is what I use. I wear tight underwear and keep it on me at all times while working. Stays between 90 and 95 degrees. Passed six random this way. If the temp was ever low I just rubbed the temp strip with my thumb before handing it to the person administering the test.
just dont care helps
If they’re drug free workplace then the employer can choose not to hire if you fail test. Exactly what the post said.
i'm still an apprentice :/
it's so they can protect themselves in extreme examples, such as someone coming to work high on crack and if you fucked up something then YOU would be at fault if you tested positive. It's just corporate greed in America
This
Had job with enough disoosable income to support opiate addiction with a side order of meth
A family with vacations
And 2 side chicks
Its was stressful having to juggle
Now that i have the habits but none of the stressful shit!
10/10 recommend
This has worked for me several times.
The key is that you CANNOT detox. What you are doing is masking the fact that you are extremely diluting with water. Meaning, you drink a shit ton of water, and this drink is really replacing the stuff that they look for to determine if you were diluting.
1) GNC - buy Total Eclipse™ Definite™ Detox
2) Beginning the night before, start drinking 2 liters of water.
3) The morning of the test, keep drinking another liter of water.
4) A few hours before the test, drink the detox.
5) Drink another bottle of water.
6) Take piss test.
Again, anyone telling you that you can detox, is wrong. THC is stored in your fat cells. Which is why you can quit, and then feel high weeks later if you start exercising, because when you lose the weight it's releasing captured THC.
The theory behind the detox drink is that you are diluting your piss by drinking a ton of water. The detox drink is replacing things like vitamin B and other elements that they look for to determine "gravity" of your urine.
I've passed several work drug tests with this method. The catch, you need to know a day before to start drinking water the night before.
However, more and more in the US companies are not testing for marijuana anymore. But depends on the job.
>such as someone coming to work high on crack
See Also, if something does happen, say an employee runs a customer over with a fork lift, and the police investigation shows that the driver was intoxicated, then only the employee gets the blame. The company only gets the blame if it was company practices that caused the accident (for example overworking employees, or not having the correct training etc).
Dont know if it's been mentioned yet. CERTO gelatin works, u pour out some Gatorade and put in the packet then drink the Gatorade after mixing. U do this 2- hours before test and pee once before test.
I was on probation for years and what worked for me was water, lots and lots of water. I would put a few drops of bleach in the first double gulp of water and drink 2 or 3 more without. Make sure you piss 2 or 3 times before you go in and make sure your piss looks like water. If they give you any shit about it tell them "that's just my pee, I drink water every day" I have never had a dirty test from this. I did have a dirty test from doing the stupid pee clean drinks. Other folks swear by certo as well.
No. The employer can NOT just choose to employ you or not. Because thats called insurance fraud, and they'll lose their policy, and probably also have legal issues. If its a drug-free workplace, and you fail, you do not get hired, period.
Doesn't work on newer tests.
You can skip the bleach. Does nothing. Old wives tale.
>THC is stored in your fat cells. Which is why you can quit, and then feel high weeks later if you start exercising, because when you lose the weight it's releasing captured THC.
Holy fuck, thats the dumbest shit I've ever read.
not a doctor, but heres what i think happened. weed stays in ones system for upto one month, cause it gets deposited into the fat cells, by being a fat fuck, the weed probably got deposited into the 'nearest' fat cells. when you started working out, those 'nearest' fat cells got burnt first. if you were a skinny fuck, the weed would have gotten more dispersed through the various fat cells. and when you worked out, you wouldnt have necessarily burnt the right fat cells. but im no doctor, thats just my guess
Detox for a few months unfortunately if you smoke a lot of weed
Except it's 100% true. Look it up douchebag.
Almost every medical site discussing THC withdraw mentions it.
what part? as far as i know, the 'weed' (as in the particles that test positive on a drug test) are stored in fat cells. the whole 'feeling high when working out cause the thc is re-released' is questionable to me though. but might be plausible.
Stop smoking weed you weak minded junkhead
nurse here, you're fucked bud.
your boss will probably use the element of surprise.
Plus if your fat, you're even more fucked. THC is fat soluble.
all you can do it drink a fuck ton of water all the time and work out regularly
Why are you such a faggot?
He asked that exact question. Also nice ad hominem.
There are a bunch of Reddit threads on just this thing. Many people experience it.
Ironically it's very common because a lot of people who quit, wind up hitting the gym, etc... as they get more motivated.
Then they choose to not hire you. Exactly what every post you replied to said. Look up the word ‘or’. Need help with the spelling?
Lol have fun failing drug tests retard
I mean it's not like you need a high school diploma to come on this site. I expect to see retards like this daily.
spend $$ on a fake dick and the warming pad and clean piss. There is a kit google it faggot.
All you're talking about is an adrenaline high. Yes, THC (lol at the weed particles) is stored in fat. And hair. And body fluids. But you don't get any euphoria out of it when they're "re-released", because they're being released all the time until there are none left, which is how you fail a test in the first place. Fuckin christ.
>In theory
we're done here, shit dick.
There is no "or" in the choice. Thats the point. You fail your employment screen, there is no choice in hiring. What don't you understand about that. You have to re-apply and maybe get in if you test clean, but chances of getting re-interviewed is about zero.
Have fun with your fucking cartoons, faggot.
Kys
I'd love to see what you look like.
Guaranteed white trash, with cheesy facial hair, bad tats, and live like a white nigger.
You're just a hateful bitter faggot.
Amiright?
At least I'm not stupid enough to fail a drug test you fucking shit stain
inconclusive means a 2nd test in almost every situation, this dude just wants you to drink bleach, fuck this guy
Are you retarted? Fake piss comes with a heating pad.
You must be a nigger.
Wow
How is it connected with intelligence?
Because you have to be stupid to fail a drug test.
Either prepare yourself, or don't do drugs.
Fuck off tweaker fag.
Regarding medical marijuana prescriptions...
“It depends on what state you live in. About a dozen states with medical marijuana laws include protections for employees' off-duty use with a valid prescription, as long as they don’t show up to work under the influence of marijuana. In these states, employers cannot fire medical marijuana users based solely on a positive drug test. The employer would need some evidence that you were under the influence of marijuana at work or during work hours.”
You literally choose to disagree with scientific data that could help you pass a drug test. People who don't agree with science tend to be fucking stupid. But that's just my assumption.
No bro, no you gotta buy the snake oil and strap a tube to your dick full of fake piss. Works for me all the time, totally legit bro....
I'm not the one failing the test, dick knob.
Right. Legitimate advice here from someone well informed on the subject.
Drug products will be detectable in your system and there is little you can do to change their levels.
There's some things tho. Being well hydrated could increase clearance time. Fasting or otherwise losing fat will release speed up release.
But it's hard to make use of that information because releasing thc into the system could lead to rise in presence in body fluids. While trying to clear any detectable signs you may inadvertently cause detectable THC to rise at just the wrong time for the test. Don't crash diet the day before a test.
Chronic users will have detection time up to a week or more. Occasional users is more like 3 days. Could possibly be more or less tho.
Drug tests are actually pretty poor for many substances. It's quite possible it may just not be detected.
Drugs tests have a high false positive rate. Use that fact in any argument in your favour if you are caught out.
Substances can be cross reactive with the test and produce or increase false positive effect. In the case of thc, ibuprofen can give a false positive.
Finally, often drug tests are only used as a preliminary analysis and often a false + may or can be sent for spectral analysis. In which case there is no avoiding detection out side of it being clear by the body.
I work in IT and have never had a 'surprise' drug test. Most have been the wink-wink-nudge-nudge 'we need to test you so how's next week or so sound' which gives me plenty of time to drink water for a week and piss clean every time so far.
As for surprise tests, you're fucked.
IF you're the faggot doubting facts, then go eat a dick.
I'd love to see what you look like.
Guaranteed white trash, with cheesy facial hair, bad tats, and live like a white nigger.
You're just a hateful bitter faggot.
Amiright?
No. I'm retired, have money, a house in the country, a few days of beard, no ink, and smoke weed whenever the fuck I want. I used to work for a pipeline. Made good money. And thats where I learned how to pass a piss test.
Yeah, I can read. It fails to mention there is no approved limit to marijuana intoxication. So if you work in a sensitive position, anything critical, like a pilot, you're not flying no matter how many fucking prescriptions you have.
So you're a blue collar guy, and refuting medical facts for no reason other than being a douchebag .
It would be better if you were white trash. You'd have an excuse.
Why are you double posting, retard nigger?
Bored, and wanted an answer.
I was white collar. Not every pipeline employee is a roughneck. Those were (including mine) all DOT jobs, therefore, piss test required. Our company did have positions where there were no urine screens, but they were secretarial.
>implying that wasn't the point
Then you really don't have an excuse for being a contrary faggot.
Depends on the test. If they take a hair sample you're fucked.
This
Its called quickfix 6.2
Make sure its between 95-99 degrees
Works every time
Drink lots and lots of water.
Shave your whole body and start a regimen of cabbage and vinegar.
get fake prescriptions
If I use twice as much bleach as you described will it work better? I’m gonna try it I just wanna make sure I don’t use too much bleach
Pilots- there is the problem. How many commercial passenger pilots have been in the news lately for being arrested for being drunk in flight? Why arent employers doing alcohol screening test for employment?
Oh, perfect. Do you know if CBD oil is legal in norway?
where doe one buy fake piss? online?
cops can urine drug test you in Norway just for suspected DUI with out a search warrant or court order?
just ask a friend that’s clean get it free
Keep clean backup piss in your fridge at all times.
Keep it fresh.
Or you can just buy fake piss. This is for employment not parole. Due to lots of reasons they shouldn't be watching you piss.. I used the monkey piss brand just tucked under my nuts to keep it at body temp. This was for a govt job and worked fine.
have friend pee into 5 hour energy bottle, get hot water or coffee from 711 on ur way to pee place.
once outside the place, in ur car, warm up the pee bottle inside the hot water or coffee, checking with thermometer.
last parts the hard part...…..all of that is super easy......now u have to lube the bottle up and put it into ur butt, don't worry tho, its going to want to shoot out on its own, if they ask anything, tell them u have to shit really bad and if they can hurry up lol. jk don't do that ull be fine.
if u really want to, u can fuck urself with a big black dildo first to make the whole process way easier plus ull be chill as fuck.
Hair is pretty easy to pass too if you’ve got a day warning