How do you, kindly, deal with an annoying child that won't leave you alone?

Move to the next state over

Lock your door next time you’re jerking it to trap hentai

Yes. It is a child, of course, age 5, and they don't have a concept of boundaries yet.

The child is legally and ethically not my responsibility, numbnuts.

So, you're in a situation where you are unable to avoid this kid whatsoever? I would say go to the parents again, because violence wont solve anything in this case. Explain that the kid wont leave you alone. This is pretty ignorant on the parents end if you ask me.

Bring your toys and have a playdate

I would love to do that, but I don't want the emotional ramifications of guilt after doing so and my biggest fear; having the police involved.

Obviously I wouldn't resort to violence, but I guess I could try again with the parents, for the 3rd time.

Have you tried to ignore the cild for a couple of days? He will be bored eventually and will leave you alone in the future "because you're no fun"

here's a tip : BE BORING! kids dont want boring in their lifes
the same aplies for crazy people

Wear a scary halloween mask

You are a shit Uncle and obviously immature. Put in some fucking time for a relationship and explain that you need time for yourself. Don't just ignore the child.

get a load of this guy

and you're a faggot, so that settles that

"Hey x you can't be in here go see mama/papa"
This has worked with all of my nieces and nephews every time without fail. They may not understand that they're annoying you but if you tell them they're not allowed in there or they're too young to be in there with you they get the idea QUICK.
Unless you're home alone with the kid, then man the fuck up and watch over the kid, get some experience before you have your own

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I usually just try to be nice, but I guess I can try being as boring as possible. I just don't want to hurt the kid, but I also don't want the constant agitation from them. I've taken them to places like the library and to a festival, so I try to be a good influence in their life, but it's like trying to be good here and there ends up with the kid being obsessed with me.

I am responsible and watch the kid from time to time, which I don't mind. It's just when I have shit to do like schoolwork or just want to relax and play a video game, the kid is always up my ass. I want to be good to the kid, but at the same time, it just reinforces their annoying behavior.

Then tell him he can watch you do it but he has to be quiet and if he isn't quiet put him in timeout. You need to teach him you'll hang with him but you can't give him attention every second not just tell him.

Fuck that. Forcing people to have children is what leads to abuse and negligence. This dude is honest and wants to go about it the best way possible.

agreed, forcing people to be around kids, especially annoying ones, creates desires to launch them out of a window

That's exactly why I have made the choice to not have children yet, maybe even wait a few more years until I do. I'm still young and finishing up university. I love the kid, but go damn can they get so fucking annoying, especially since they don't have any concept of annoyance, boundaries, the difference between right and wrong (for the most part, usually only through being told what's wrong, but no first-hand experience to evaluate things in their own thoughts), or respect for others.