Weirdest thing you did as a horny teen, share away!

LEGO antenna in pp.

I masturbated once

She was 17

Used to put my baby dick in the curtain hanger. Or one time I gutted a small flashlight, put tissues in it and fucked that.

fuck no you’re going to hell

>later mom comes to me and said she did the same thing as a kid
Masturbated to sounds of her parents fucking?

more?
does she have cum on her pussy or is that her wetness?

Girl rode on my lap on a car ride and she came multiple times just rubbing her pussy into me that was pretty weird

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Nutted into my mouth and swallowed

I had a glass tube from my aquarium that I would put up my bum while masturbating.

In retrospect, I'm glad it never broke.

Plus I was worried I was gay. But ended up marrying a hot asian girl and we bang 4 times a week. Been with her 24 years

I shat on a paper plate and rubbed my dick in it... Like a paper-plate-shit-taco-fleshlight... I was really horny

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hmmmm....

I spent 6 months stretching my back out so I could suck my own dick.

Only managed to lick the tip.

Have had back problems ever since.

Yes. I love my mom.

She started buying me condoms at 12 and told me "learn what the lesbians do and you will never have an empty bed"

I have found that to be sage advice.

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My parents took me to burning man when I was 13.

Ended up finding this lady passed out on disco fish and fucked her.

I doubt she ever knew because she was out cold.

Your mom sounds like a whore.

Someone's sexually repressed.

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Does your mom like pussy?

Buttfucked my cousin in church basement. Pic is greentext.

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Need moar of this slut that butthole is huge

I also burned my dick on a lightbulb. I guess i was thinking it would be warm lole a pussy? Touched it to the underside of my dick. Had a big blister. Sucked, man.

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Got blueballed by a girl. Went home and fucked the couch.

I'm pretty sure she goes both ways

Hot. Any stories?

Decided to beat off as many times in one day as I could. 22 times, by the end my dick was red and sore from friction burns and my balls were completely out of semen.

Ouch

fucked a senior citizen

Sucked my own dick from age 9-12.

was it hot?

>weirdest thing you did as a horny teen
your mom

>be me
>like 11
>Got bit by a spider on my scrote
>swollen up and got flaky and red
>nuts the size of baseballs feels like
>there was a family friend at church who was a nurse
>mom asks her to look at it
>she says it was a spider bite
>then says she wished her husbands dick was as big as mine
>diamonds
>think about that offhand joke damn near every time a jerk off for the next five or six years.

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One time she had me help her delete pics off her phone and I saw an orgy

16-19 I'd jerk off in front of a camera on some adult chat site and plenty of people would watch

Looks like more people than just you love your mom.

Any hot pics? Did you save them?

This but with a leech

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Actually went through with it huh?
So many times I've been like "oh fuck that's so hot this is a great idea" but have always noped out at the last possible second.

how big were you

Bullshit

Newsflash. EVERYONE'S a whore. That's how babies are made, whore.

Hate to say it but yea, I jerked off a ton thinking about it

Do you ever ask your wife to use the glass tube on your while she jerks you off? That sounds hawt.

I didnt measure. But it was swollen pretty big and beet red.

I tried meth.

Went doink and phoned up my dad and told him I was getting a sex change and would be wearing dresses from now on.

Got so horny that I gave myself masturbation blisters and practically came blood.

Ended up downtown and asked a homeless guy to fuck me. He just beat me up

Meth is a bad idea.

Did I ask my mom if I could have the pics of her orgy while she was sitting next to me?

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Whats disco fish? Serious question.

That's gay

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You ever ask your wife to stick that glass tube in your butt as she's jerking you off? You should, cause it sounds really hawt.

No. This was before I dated her.
C. 16 yo.

She's pretty cool. Sometimes we just do MDMA and fuck for 6 hours. Anal, throat. Etc.

Fucking hot.

Art car.

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The weekend after I found out about masturbation and came for the first time I encouraged my older brother’s friends to fuck me all at once while he was passed out from alcohol. I was 13 they were 17-18. After that night a couple of them (closest to my brother that would hang the most in my home) would sometimes double team me on the weekends. My brother never found out.

Non binary?

yeah, its like the gay leaves your body just as you come

is that some american BS you guys invented to keep fighting each other?

Yea pretty much

figured
we dont have that shit where Im from and 18 is legal drinking age

A few years back I got my then-girlfriend to peg me. She agreed but it bothered her a whole lot more than she let on, she eventually left me because she couldn’t look at me as a man anymore, or something. Lucky for me I’m now with a wonderful, freaky woman, and we fuck each other’s brains out regularly.

I made it to 27 once when I was 14, I pretended to be sick and stayed home from school and everything for it lmao

What happened afterwards?

wow, thats nearly a week for me

Hate to say it but yea, I jerked off a ton about it.

Sucked my own cock, pissed in my mouth, came in my mouth, stuck stuff up my butt while spanking the monkey like crazy. Good times

Well looks like it's time to get back on that horse and smash a new record

I probably jerked off around 30000 times between ages 10-16 honestly. Nowadays I do it only like once a day if at all

Went into my girlfriend's house while her and the family was on vacation. They had a hidden spare key. I was pretty into her adopted little sister. Jerked off into her panty drawer like 3x

So true. And you feel quite dirty afterwards with al that cum on your face

Got drunk at 14 and let my best friend fuck my ass

I tried to jack off into my friends sisters panties once, got scared when U heard them coming upstairs

Well how big are you now? Likely hasn’t changed much

I was curious about anal so I shit inside a pringles can and fucked it.

grew up on a farm in the middle of nowhere, ended up directing my pent up hormones towards our horses. we had a huge draft horse that I loved to rim, id suck on his asshole all day. it kinda tasted nice, it was strong and grassy. when I got anywhere near his pucker he’d immediately lift his tail and his dick would drop, he’d press up against my face a lot too. I don’t see him as often as I used to, but he still enjoys my attentions

(30,000/6years)/365=13.7 times per day. You probably have a callous where your baby-dick used to be...

awww that's really cute

shhh, don't let (((them)))

only gave myself a facial once but i agree. its probably better when you are still horny

>Freshmen year of high school
>join the freshmen football team
>was a fucking tank at TE and DE
>get moved up to the Junior Varsity team
>go to private catholic school so pretty diverse: whites, blacks, latinas, asians
>anyway we're all in the locker room and this asian dude with literally no boundaries and just blatantly talking about porn
>secretly think he's gay but whatever
>this one white guy that was a junior starts talking about home made pocket pussies
>says that he take a ziplock bag, fill it with peanut butter and microwaves it
>then he puts in the fold of his couch and fucks it until he cums
>claims it feels just like wet pussy
>stupid ass virgin ass 14 yr old me actually believes this dumb shit
>as soon as i put my key in the door, my dick is instantly hard
>my mom is still at work so i have like 3-4 hrs of private dick time
>dump peanut butter in zip lock bag
>microwave it for 3 mins
>damn this shit is nice and warm and creamy
>slip it in between 2 pillows
>slide dick into it
>NIGGA THAT SHIT FELT LIKE SCORCHED EARTH AFTER THE FUCKING ATOMIC BOMB HIT
>immediately start screaming yelling
>pull dick out
>peanut butter gets EVERYWHERE.jpg
>hot melted peanut butter still on my dick and burning
>run butt ass naked to the bathroom and stick dick into sink and run cool water
>spend like 2 hours cleaning up melted peanut butter from everywhere
>dick sensitive as fuck and no fapping for at least 2-3 weeks
>never tell any of them what i did

And that was probably the weirdest thing I've done as a horny teen. Unless you count fapping to weird porn like beastility or some shit.

More of HER holy shit

You monster.

Wait. Op, how you get them pics?

fucked an older horse we had like five times after coming home from school

was he gelded?

In the asshole? how did it feel?

This

I fucked myself with a coke bottle and it suctioned the shit out of me and into the bottle. Kinda hard to explain a bottle filled with shit in the trash.

Friend was nervous about a date, so right before he went to the movie, I blew him.

Put my cellphone on vibrate, in a condom, stuck it up my ass and called it

no, in the pussy. Really hard to get to the right height and force your way inside since the horse would be moving side to side to avoid you. Once actually inside tho really good. No where near as loose as i thought it would be and the horse does this weird popping thing with its clit. Came inside of her every time and then felt awful after

I had sex in the trunk of an SUV while my friend drove down the freeway

Context? Post was deleted and I’m curious

lmfao this is karma and hilarious

bruhh u almost got quints. fuck

Checked

Your mom is a degenerate, and you are a degenerate, too

Put on my sisters one piece swimsuit, pulled it up my ass like a thong, and masterbated against a door with her dirty panties on my head. You're welcome.

No, it's because she's a whore

Yea sounds about right, no callous but the main 'areas of friction' are white, almost looks like a burn lmao, its been going away though

Ate out my little cousin while she was asleep but figured she was actually awake most times I did it

I was 18 she was 11

youre a pedophile

Wtf you're even more degenerate than the guy jerking off to his mom getting fucked

Peeped on 22 yo neighbor fucking her boyfriend.

Stole panties a couple times.

did you get caught?

>I was 14-ish I think
>Xmas at my house
>Whole family is coming over
>First few families arrive
>Including my sister's family
>They have a daughter, my niece
>She's probably 10-ish
>Parents tell me to entertain her until more kids show up
>I'm all whatever
>We're up in my room
>She's watching me play XBox
>She gets bored and starts kicking me with her bare feet
>It's super annoying because she's fucking up my game
>Give up and start tickling her feet
>She's laughing and laughing
>She's like "tickle me here" and she points to her calf
>I do
>"Now tickle me here" and she points to her knees
>I do
>"Now here" and she hikes up her dress to point at her thigh
>I do with both hands
>"Here" and she points to the crease between her leg and body
>Basically the edge of her underwear
>I'm thinking holy fuck what am I doing
>But I say out loud "well you have to move your underwear then"
>I'm fully prepared to backtrack and say I was only kidding
>She does it without hesitation
>Just pulls her underwear to the side
>Flashing me her whole naked crotch
>I wiggle my fingers lightly on her vaj lips
>She laughs and squirms more
>Falls onto her back
>But she's carefull to keep holding her underwear to the side for me
>Weird that this was her idea
>Tell her I'm surprised she's cool with me touching her privates
>She's like oh I know about this kind of stuff now
>Now? Uh...
>Ask her if anybody ever tickled her there before
>She's like "yeah!" and points downstairs
>Like she was about to say someone's name in particular
>But the doorbell rings
>She hops up excited to see who is at the door

Later after dinner
>A bunch of us are hanging out in the living room
>Watching whatever shitty holiday movie was on TV
>I'm on the big recliner chair
>Niece is the type to get on people's laps
>She moves around from person to person, trying out laps
>Eventually climbs on my lap with a blanket
>All that's separating her ass from my dick is a few thin layers of fabric.
>Start getting a half chub
>She pushes my knees apart to sit in between my legs
>After a while she is absentmindedly touching my legs
>Following the inside seam of my pants up my leg
>My half chub is pointing down one of my pants legs
>She finds it and starts tracing it with her fingers
>Now it's a raging boner
>She starts "massaging" it
>Not handjob motions
>Just running her hand along it and squeezing a little every now and then
>Basically playing with it through my pants
>I move her hands away a couple of times
>But she goes right back to it
>She reaches behind her with the other hand
>Starts feeling my balls
>Same absentmindedness
>Sorta kneading my ballsack like a stress ball (but softly)

>This goes on 15 minutes or so
>I'm secretly going crazy
>I put my hands on her waist.
>She grabs my hands and moves them under her dress onto her bare legs, right where her legs meet her ass
>The side of her ass cheeks are SO SOFT and warm
>She casually reaches back
>Keeps playing with my dick with one hand and ballsack with the other
>I want to say I was super conflicted but truth is I 100% was not
>But I'm about to black out from the horniness
>I start rubbing across her legs and down to her thighs
>When I do, she opens her legs more for me
>Holy shit
>I move my hands over her underwear and sorta palm her crotch
>If the blanket wasn't there it would look absolutely obscene
>Her knees splayed open
>Me rooting around her crotch
>I go for it and lift my hand to dip underneath her underwear
>I can't quite manage it
>She stops to lift away her underwear so my hand can go in
>I move my fingers around her pussy lips
>Eventually slide a finger down through her lips
>Feel the little nub of her clit
>Then down further
>And I feel her getting a little wet
>HOLY
>SHIT
>I WISH I could say I fingered her and she came or some bullshit like that
>But no
>Feeling her getting wet was too much
>I start cumming in my pants
>She looks down at my leg
>Keeps a hand on my dick like she's feeling it throb while I cum
>My eyes are like dinner plates while I am re-aware of EVERYBODY sitting around me
>Nobody's looking.

>I get weird and pull my hands back
>She decides to move to another seat
>I have to quickly grab a pillow to cover the dark circle of cum soaking up through my pants
>My plan is to wait for the right time to run upstairs and change
>I notice my niece has settled on one of my cousin's lap (12-13yo guy)
>My niece covers them up and sorta settles in
>The same way she did with me
>I'm watching like NO FUCKING WAY
>Sure enough I see her arms move around
>And I can tell she's reaching behind her
>I watch my cousin look down at himself, then at her, then back at the TV
>His eyes are huge and panicky
>I can make out the movements of him pushing her hands away
>And her moving her hands right back
>She does something good, I guess, because his eyes roll back a little
>He reaches down under the blanket
>I know he was wearing track pants
>Looked like the sort of suck-in-and-dip-forward motion when you take out your dick
>Holy shit did he?
>She starts moving a little at the shoulder
>HOLY FUCKING SHIT
>She IS jacking him off!
>Once I see it it's impossible to mistake that motion
>It's crazy obvious
>But nobody else in the room seems to be seeing it
>I'm astonished and a little jealous
>I should've worn shorts or something
>My cousin is arching his back and lifting his hips
>By the looks of how their sorta rocking in unision she's pumping him hard
>Another minute or so he clenches his eyes and tenses up
>I see him twitch a few times as he cums
>Then she pulls the blanket off of him and sits on the floor
>He quickly lets the waistband of his track pants snap back up
>Same as me, he grabs a pillow to cover himself
>Meanwhile she holds up her hand and looks at it
>I can see his clear cum glistening on the top of her hand
>She casually puts her mouth on it and sucks it clean
>He has a WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED look on his face
>My niece just curls up into her blanket nest like nothing happened
>I eventually run off and change

Made A LITERAL U-TURN TO SEE A GUY

Underrated post

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raped all 3 girls in my middle school study group

raped by her dad?

Damn that’s kinda sad if you think about it

I never thought to ask because I'm an idiot. But I've never seen them act weird together.

Pretty much and still am but not into kids just young teens

how is she now? still sexual? or became edgy teen because she realized she was raped?

And I Oop.

Whats your Snapchat?

So I can talk to you on Why its a bad thing

Thanks, this was entertaining.

No she seems super normal now. Almost boring. No acting out. Not gay or dating black guys, etc. But she's not shy either. I really think this was just a phase she was going through (at least as far as doing stuff with me).

interesting, some kids are just more sexually hyperactive than others. but still not a good sign that she was about to admit that someone else was touching her. oh well

I warmed up and cut a hole in a piece of liver and fucked it. Later that night, my drunk aunt took it out of the fridge, cooked it, and ate it. To this day I don't know why I put it back in the fridge. I also don't know why I fapped myself raw later that night when I watched her eat it. I guess jizz becomes tasteless when you cook it in liver.

Weirddest thing done

>Be me ~15
>Nephew ~7
>Nephews jerk me off
>I return the favor
>I show them porn
>They go home, see a scene in a movie
>Start doing handjob motions
>One snitches on me and tells parents i showed them porn while the other defends me
>Got a tiny lecture
>Still dont know i got a handy from both

That's not really weird... unless you are counting the fact that you got away with it.

>Me 15
>Was on omegle
>Used to show my 11 year old cock and jerk it on omegle (Not pertaining to the story)
>Joined a random text chat
>Guy says something random
>Me: What is S2R?
>Guy disconnects
>Me googles it
>After deep searching
>And Curiosity
>Ends up finding CP
>Jerks off to it
>Never touches it again

It was people my age aswell. No more than 2 years younger.

To this day that was the hardest I had ever came.
Was the time i watched it

did it hurt?

>Me 15
>Used to show my 11 year old cock

what the fuck

IT was years ago. It came to mind mid greentext lmao

The ice planet orange one....?

>lived with famous athlete/ model about five years ago just prior to get becoming worldwide famous
>She gets home from a sweaty gym session.
>Her and all roommates leave for the night.
>Find her lacy, still damp gym underwear

Fap to the fine smell of her and cum buckets. Probably the seediest thing I've done and felt pretty weird after.

Also no, not saying who she is but I guarantee quite a fair few people would know of her.

My sister kept being turned down by a popular guy because he didn't want to be someone's first sexual experience and he wanted to be with someone who knew what they were doing.
Sister came up with a plan. I refused until she touched me... blood to penis... pornos and my participation gave her the experience she needed.
Guy shot her down again anyway.

MODS ARE ON A BANNING SPREE
Thread exposing terrorist mod just got deleted!
archive.fo/4v28P
archive.fo/4v28P
archive.fo/4v28P

MODS ARE ON A BANNING SPREE
Thread exposing terrorist mod just got deleted!
archive.fo/4v28P
archive.fo/4v28P
archive.fo/4v28P

Odessa, Gilroy, Dayton, El Paso, Christchurch and others are Mod Motivated Shootings. (MMS)
archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/224742511/#q224742511

There is a terrorist mod that is grooming extremists for shootings.
In shooting, civil war, and AntiFa threads.

An extremist group worked their way into the ranks of mods so they could use their position to groom extremist shooters and frame Yea Forums to take it down from the inside out and they tested it on infinitychan first.

They’re trying to destroy Yea Forums before the election and give the MSM a narrative.

One of the mods is keeping tabs on all of the other mods and is a mole gathering information and names of the mods.

Pic related is a leak from Discord of all the mods!
Save before they delete again
Last thread: archive.fo/4v28P

FUCK JANNY

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>be me at 15
>go to a day camp for the summer
>make really close friends
>crushes are everywhere because teenagers and horomones and shit
>camp kids get informed that we’re going on a trip to another camp but this camp is a sleepaway camp that has cabins
>fuckyeah.wav
>me and my guy friends plan stuff to do
>ffw to when we go
>go to camp
>it’s cool as hell
>has a way bigger budget than our camp
>we settle into our cabins, boys cabins and girls cabins of course
>we go to the lake because they had a bunch of cool inflatable bouncy stuff because this camp had way more money than us
>counselors are jealous as hell
>we get our bathing suits on to go to the lake
>see the girls in bathing suits
>get a chub because 15
>we go in the water and swim out do to inflatable slides and trampoline looking things (idk what they’re officially called)
>one of the slides requires you to go up a ladder
>I wait to go because i want to be behind one of the girls
>one of the girls goes up the ladder
>i follow
>looking straight up and seeing some good ass
>dick is diamonds
>i wasn’t too sneaky about it because she noticed almost instantly when she looked down
>after i was out of my ass-trance i saw she was looking at me and just sotra said sorry
>once she was done looking at me i looked again and she was sorta wiggling her ass so i could see better
>dick is still fucking diamonds
>ride the slide down
>weeeeee
>land in the water and that girl is just sorta chuckling while looking at me from time to time from a distance
>embarassed but still aroused as hell

Cont? I’ve still got some good shit from that experience

a story as old as time

Cont Cunt

When I was 14/15, I was hanging out sometimes with some kids who were not a good influence. Think anything that annoying teenagers do (theft/drugs/vandalism), and we did it. Really didn’t like hanging out with them but one in particular kinda bullied me. Best thing that ever happened to my life direction was when they were completely excised from it.

Anyway, the bully one had a little sister. If we were 15, she was like 13. One day I went to his house and the three of them were in the living room and his parents were gone. I was a kissless virgin. They made me get naked with her and have her get naked too. She was ok looking but a tad overweight. I was thin and a grower not a shower. A bit above average when hard.

So they made fun of her weight and my cock and basically forced us to have sex while they watched. It was really weird. I could tell she’d been through it before. I pretended I cam in her (too young to even realize that the cum doesn’t magically disappear in a pussy), but she doesn’t say anything.

They lose interest and move on to some other degenerate project.

Never actually saw the sister again. Was kind of able to avoid them bc we went to different high schools.

The one who was the bigger bully randomly came by my house years later but I was in college and he wasn’t doing anything in life. So he kinda just left me alone. Realized that he bullied and made fun of me because he realized that despite his efforts I was doing things in life. Think he ended up enlisting. Always wondered how much perverted things the sister endured and whether she turned out ok.

What part of cali?

Kentucky has entered the chat

pee on my girl

Classic Yea Forums

Other than incest, I assume? Whenever I made breakfast when my sister had friends sleepover, I would jerk off into the pancake batter and watch them eat the pancakes.

I'd of snuck off somewhere with her for a blowjob or to eat her out or would of strangled her out of jealousy

Cont.
>We finish up at the lake and both me and her are still both chuckling at eachother from a distance
>she was totally into it
>i sure as hell was
>go back to cabins and i keep it to myself because i don’t want it getting out
>shower time
>nothing too much happened because guys have different shower times than girls did so it was basically just a locker room with an open shower area
>girls shower time was maybe 20 minutes after ours was
>me and a close friend of mine, being the pervs that we were, decided to go peek on them
>concrete building with window holes
>no glass, just wide open holes near the ceiling in the walls
>use whatever stuff we can find to bring to use as a step stool to peep some ass
>sneak out of cabin and have friends cover for us
>use folding chairs and extra folded up clothes as step stools
>there they are
>it was beautiful, a young boy’s paradise
>shower room of a lot of the camp girls showering, some had bathing suits on but most were naked
>hellfuckingyeah.mp4
>me and friend are on opposite sides of the building because we both knew we’d probably try and jerk off to them
>that’s exactly what I did
>see the girl i was talking about earlier
>fully naked
>cum buckets and started cranking another one out
>one girl noticed my friend because he was too close to the window, what an idiot
>he runs
>i stay
>they’re on high alert because of peeping toms
>that girl from earlier goes into one of the private stalls for showering and had a toilet too
>i took a chance and moved my chair and folded clothes to the one she went over to
>she was just showering by herself now
>i was conflicted if i should let her know I’m here or not because i already knew she was into me and was into the whole perv thing
>whisper to her and tell her it’s me
>she looks up and laughs like earlier but is still initially freaked out
>but calmed down once she knew it was me
Cont. coming rn

Fucked a glazed doughnut. It didn't go well.

Imagine resenting your girlfriend for realizing you are a faggot and then finding some liberal landwhale to continually fuck your ass so you can pretend to be straight and "freaky"

Drugged my cousin and masturbated while fingering her belly button. Had a huge fetish for the smell back then and was too much of a pussy to do more than that and kissing.

Got the doughnut pregnant, huh?

kek'd

Fuck off back to l/eddit furfag

>go to private catholic school
>pretty diverse

I lol'd

there's beauty in the simplicity

When my fall-down drunk sister moved back home with us, fucked her each time she blacked out. Went through a LOT of lube. To this day, she gives me looks and wiggles her ass when she's alone and around with me. I think she's trying to get me to confess I was her blackout rapist.

The FBI are getting straight retarded these days

Friend fixed his slut mother up with his friends to fuck.
Bring him a six of beer and his mother a bottle of wine and she was good to go.
great lay.

Imagine being this terrified of your own body

>weirdest

>posts gayest

Cont.
>I tell her that she’s hot and that we should fuck because 15 and constantly horny
>she just says hahaha nawww and just continued to shower but somehow more seductively
>i said sorry again but she seemed completely fine with me being there
>fuck it
>start jerking off again
>now that she’s preforming for an audience she’s moving her hips a bit and giving a little show for me
>hardest I’ve ever came in my life
>Said that i needed to go before i got caught
>she laughs again and says that she won’t say anything
>cool
>i leave and go back to the boys cabin
>go in my bunk bed and reminisce on what just happened
>the rest of the trip we just sort of had a really sexually tense energy around eachother
When we were about 17 we ended up fucking at an overnight at our camp at home

I still talk to her but we’re just friends, it’s just a thing we laugh about now but god damn i wish i could do it all again

After every one went to sleep id fill a ziplock bag with lotion a put it between the couch cushions throw on some porn stick my dick between the cushions and edge myself before I knew it was a thing. Lol

Fucking kek.

FUCKING KEK

Posted my ass online

Imagine being this "woke" and voting for bernie and still being a fucking faggot

Male or female?

well, yo do are a faggot, you like being fucked in the ass: big faggot. don't be afraid, it's ok

Is her name Rachel?

my mom did the same shit to me
i'm still a 28 year old virgin

Thanks user, I don't get many greentexts worth saving these days. Have a link

bitDOTly
/2dj3tGq

It's a bunch of old greentexts. Not super old, 5-10 years maybe.

lurk moar

One time my sister who didn’t shower for like three days left her black panties and yoga pants in the hamper and left the house right away and the panties were covered in white cum. Even the pants had some too. I buried my face in it and it was by far the best smell I’ve ever experienced in my life. Dick was hardest it’s ever been definitely one of the best nuts of my life, better than sex tbh. I still smell her panties but that was definitely the best it’s ever been.

I mean, i could talk about the time we fucked

This is platinum.

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Fed my little sister my cum as 'cough medicine' I didn't really do it because I was horny I did it as I was bored and pissed off at my mom.

"18"

Cont. about the time me and this girl fucked

>we were both 17
>still had sexual tension between eachother from when we were 15 as previously explained
> we both stay at the camp for years
>an overnight at the camp is going on and we bring sleeping bags and stuff for the night
>i put my sleeping bag next to my friends
>that girl is still hot as hell
>we both wanted eachother but never got time or talked to eachother enough to do it
>there was a clear area where we ended up making out
>there was a nurses office with a couch in it that we used
>the nurses office and pool next to it were both closed and no one was there because it was late at night
>we snuck in and made out for a while
>i grabbed her crotch and she pulled my hips towards hers
>we both rushed to take off our pants
>fucked like animals
>mfw no condom
>pulled out and came on her stomach
>mfw still no one knows we did it

Hey mommy dum dum I just made my sister eat my cum bet that makes you feel pretty stupid huh

Fucked on a bench in a park with an ex that had a small dick
Fucked in a tennis field
Fucked in the workshop
Fucked while parents n relatives home, could hear n did hear
Fucked in a car few feet away from the club for ppl to see
Did a bj on the beach with ppl around
Fucked with a friend in a park

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Shoved a stick up my ass that was still attached to a tree.

Also lined the horn on the end of a clarinet with bubble wrap and fucked it, first time I ever came and I thought I'd broken my dick.

I havent laughed this hard in a while

Do you do it to degrade yourself or get off on public/other people knowing you're fucking?

Played Truth or Dare with my sister and her friends when she was having a sleepover.
My sister picked "Dare". Her friend dared her to fuck me. The situation went sideways. They held her down and stripped her. I was going to pretend I was going to fuck her until I noticed she was wet.
Blood to dick, no blood to brain. I fucked her with her giving very little resistance to her being held down.
Found out later it was my sister's idea and she wanted to see if I would do it. Her and her friends were twisted. I got a lot of sex that I was ashamed to get through them. Ironically, they were the school "mean girls".

Anyone else kind of hear this as some alternative lyrics to "Sweet Home Alabama"?

God I wish I had a sister like you user. You did the right thing.

More stories of them?

I jacked off into my step sister's clean panties.

I believe it, I burned my balls on a space heater in a similar... mishap

Once they had a little "party" with 3 girls that wanted to join their clique. I was there with 2 other guys. They all told the girls that they had to do stuff with us. They were only really willing to give handjobs or reluctant blowjobs but they teamed up on them to make it sex, one of the other guys was doing his girl anally because she was on the rag. The girls took lots of pictures. The pictures that they did not delete looked like they were really into it. They used those pics to make their boyfriends dump "their cheating girlfriends". They did end up being their tools for the rest of their time in school... 2 of them became actual sluts because nobody would trust them to be real girlfriends.

>Be me, 13 with gf
>Family is gone except brother
>fast forward, she's pinned to the wall by her neck, begging to be fucked
>Fuck her up the ass, probably made too much noise
>daylong fuck fest
>she came about 20 times, was the fucking tongue master
>Cuddle naked on bed for a while while playing with her pussy
>Brother comes in for some reason, stares wide eyed and just walks out slowly
>She whispered to me that he was pretty damn cute and started to jerk me off
>Realize now I'm a dumbass, should have invited him to have him smash
>Forever regret missed opportunity

When I jerk off that much I start to get a shooting pain in the back of my head whenever I cum. I think it’s an aneurysm.

You gay?

Why in the world havnt you fucked your mom yet? She said it was ok to jerk off to her fucking just dont get caught... she would totally fuck you

Were you on acid?

Ps your vagina is in the sink

I love that episode of Archer. Personally, I would not have freaked out about it.

"Fucked her" raped her

It's only rape if you are caught and convicted and sentenced in a court of law.

I.. Had a very damaged relationship with sex in my teens, let's just say that.

Got it. Unwilling cum dumpster. Sorry.

trips confirm

Actually that's about how it got started,
>people think your bragging when you say a female teacher fucked you
>not so fun when shes old and disgusting and your 11
Started just thinking "if it feels good or must be good" and things quickly spiraled down from there

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homophobes are usually closeted gays anyways. does your father hate gays too? are you repressing your fag self and projecting? it's ok

>arachnophobes secretly want to fuck spiders

Hahahaha

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Homophobia is a form of bigotry and-or hate. Real phobias are anxiety-based fear reactions to irrational stimuli. Read a book, not a neocon podcast.

Kek'd

I wonder where Colin Downer and the rest of the /comm/ tards went

Probably jerk off into my sisters panties, its not the weirdest thing but yeah

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I understand what you are saying. I fucked a mini-mare in 3-4 different times. I loved her pussy but ir was hard to stay inside because she moved quite a bit. Just once she pressed me against the wall of the barn but she was in heat that time. The other times I went to fuck her ass where a bit easier since she kinda stops as for shitting, just lifting her tail and waiting for me to end. I had a couple of regrets since those times were rushed and I couldn't thank her properly nor with masturbation nor with a food treat and I felt like shit just caressing her.
Hope to do it again in the future but I don't think it will be easy.

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Post new link

Probably watch zoo porn with a female cousin when 13-14

Why didn't you cum?

Why? The one I posted works. I tested with a few devices.

Neat. Good shit.

This sounds very Japanese

>its not a real phobia, your just an asshole
>we just call it that
>lol you dont want your dick sucked by a MAN?! what, are you SCARED?
I cant believe I actually used to think gags were cool

>fucked myself in the ass with the handle of a screwdriver
>graduated to using bottles of varying sizes filled with warm water/wrapped in a condom
>By 14 I was bottoming out on a full 12oz water bottle while thinking of how much I'd love to have my female crush be doing this to me
>At 15 at a buddy's house party (his parents were away) we were playing truth or dare, I chose dare, girl dated me to let her pinch/twist my nipple for 30 seconds "to see if guys enjoy it as much as girls"
>also at 15 I self pierced my nipples with safety pins

As you know, slavs are really freaking psychos.

At school mine wierdest thing was making my neighbor from summer camp to suck my dick (we was young and thought that it isnt gay, lol)

But I have plenty of wierd stories about my class- or just friends.

"Anyone who doesn't like something, must secretly love it." Great logic

gtfo normie

Story time

Kek

If you say so, Satan.

LMAO
NOTED

Still here normiefag?

Because I had two guys watching me and telling me/us what to do. It wasn’t erotic at all. The only redeeming part of it (Superficially) was I knew I was losing my V card.

masturbated on my friend's mom's face while she was sleeping on the couch

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I did it because when I'm horny i can't control myself at all

LOL! fokin died

nice one bro. did you stick around to see her wake up?

LOL! fukin died

more?

Once i fucked myself with a deodorant, i smelled so nice afterwards

don't you have school in the morning? get some sleep.

yeah she woke up quite a bit later, complained about drooling in her sleep and licking her lips she looked like she was tasting something fowl

Did the tree thing too a few times while out riding my bike. Fun times.

how TF do you get away with this shit?

lmfao !... big ass jizz stains and she thinks it drool ....

LMAO

i had been staying at their house for almost a week and was horny as fuck and not thinking straight. she had the habit of sleeping on the living room couch sometime. So I waited for my friend to go take one of his long showers (probably jerking himself off in there) and then masturbated on her face, like a week's worth, just made sure not to hit her eyes and get around her mouth

>Me at 15 yo
>Discovering all kinks in internet and finding out "turning into slut" fetish
>Hmmm, my mom is just 35 and look pretty good
>Spying on her in shower with my old phone with cam, hidden in towels
>Selling her nudes in i-net on our small town websites
>Still feeling not good after fap, but when getting boner, moral goes off and I continue
>After a few months of selling mom nudes, start to make rumors about "dat whore for 15$"
>Bait some men
>Give them a moms number
>They spread it among their friends and to infinite...
>Moms phone began to ringing up even at night, shes really angry
>Even heard her screaming "IM NOT A CHEAP WHORE STOP CALLING ME"
>Once she walks from her work and bunch of guys meet her in a half of the way
>Moms holes became two buckets and she was totally ruined
>After a month she makes abortion
>Still cant sit properly cause of ruined and torned anus healed not well and cant hold farts

Just, dont do this guys, even youre feeling horny as fuck. Fantasies are fantasies, and irl is irl. Im still blame myself for that shit

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Epic hilarious. How did you pull of jerking next to her?

i took the pic then tried to remove some of the globs of cum, I was more worried about my friend coming out the shower to see the mess. just ended up putting a bit more on her lips. got rid of the white globs it just looked like a wet patch around her face

The best!

from behind so i could get a nice view of her ass (wearing PJ's) but if she happened to wake up she wouldnt see me standing infront of her. Just as I was about to blow I walked to the other side of the couch so again if she opened her eyes she was facing out and wouldn't see me standing next to her. most of it landed on her nose and mouth, some next to her face which she stuck her face in later

its 12:41, and I have already finished with college. And youre still fucking normiefag

Are you on twitch by chance?

>do what the lesbians do

In terms of girls being better than guys in bed, I've only ever heard of them putting in a lot more time on foreplay

>normie
>normiefag

and you still have autism.

Walked around my local park naked or crossdressed.

I was 13 (f) and started getting horny and watching porn. I had a crush on one of my brother's friends (15-16?) and just straight up asked if he wanted to a blowjob some time. I did later that night when everyone else went to sleep we snuck off to the stairs and he sat on the top stair and i was laying down on steps below it

That sounds like a dream, sure he enjoyed it

This is funny, more.

what, you didn't get your cock when you were 4?

I used to let my dog suck me off regulary. didn't even need peanut butter or stuff like that, dude just loved licking my dick for half an hour straight before he got bored and I needed to tell him to keep going.

>growing up on farm
>16 at the time
>horny as fuck
>tfw no gf
>start watching porn everyday
>notice some of our horses have pussies too
>get addicted to horse porn soon afterwards
>decide "fuck it" and nut up to fuck a horse
>sneak out to the stable
>try to feel up the biggest mare
>get rejected
>almost get my ass kicked into oblivion
>didn't learn the first time and move to the pony
>surprisingly the pony is an absolute slut
>play around fingering her cunt for a long time
>get horny enough to go into the pen
>end up dropping my pants
>slide right in while hyperventilating
>raw-dogging horse pussy
>about to cum after the first minute
>worried about leaving a mess and my parents finding the pony dripping cum
>pull out and cum into my pants
>have to put them back on while I walk back to the house
>so ashamed and paranoid I swore I'd never do it again
>still haven't had a repeat because I don't want to get caught

>even gets rejected by a fucking horse

oh lord my sides

Second story of this. Great now I have to try it. Even the one before described it wasn't loose

did you open the stuffing zipper that's on the side, just a tad, or did you squish two cushions on your whammy jammy for the friction.... asking for a friend lol

Oh Fuck my sides.

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14 years old....apartment complex has smaller community pool. Head to pool on hot summer day by myself. College age girl laying out on a chair. One other couple there but not paying any attention. Jump in pool right as she flips over to tan her back. Notice nice ass and yummy feet’s. Cock gets instahard. Thoughts of master bating fill my head. Notice there are apartment windows facing the pool. Fuck it. Whip my dick out and furiously fap until I cum right in the pool. Head straight out of the pool and home. Was nervous for about a week wondering if someone saw.

Injected air into my bladder, promptly got a UTI because it was enamas water in the bath as well

All the posts ITT are by white bois

No, Im black guy

Figured that some balm which is used to treat bruises (that are made of blood) would make my peepee (that is made of blood) feel funny so I injected it into my urethra. Immediatly regretted that decision as it startet to burn like any burn I ever felt. Luckily I had some pee ready to go to flush it out. Burning lasted for hours tho and I was afraid my dick falls off. Good times.

Here comes the fucking racist trying to be clever.

Gtfo , and never come back Nigger!.

A friends milf came onto me when I was 15
Had to tell her no so I decided to cum in a dress she was planning on wearing the next day at a party she was taking me along to

It's true. If the topic if this thread would be about rape, murder, welfare, not washing yourself or acting like apes, it would mostly be niggers, tho. I prefer people that experiment with their own penis in young years instead of being useless subhuman animal scum their whole "life". :)

>Me at 13
>Mom forgot to lock door while showering
>walked in and got a good look before bailing out
>Used her dirty panties in the laundry to masturbate with

got a girl to fly to me for a weekend when we were 16 so i could take her virginity.

Your dog gay

Glad I’m not the only one it weird to have to come up with a story when they broke on the bathroom floor

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girl?

Wtf is non-binary

>i still blame myself for that shit
no duh, it was probably your fault.
you should blame yourself

Never talk to me again, you freak !!!

I might attempt again now that I can buy rubbers.
Although I won't be able to brag or share now that /zoo/ and /horse/ are dead, probably for the best.

I was at a concert and there was a chick in front of me who kept unintentionally bouncing her ass straight on my cock to the beat of the music, at first I turned away but between not getting a good view of the band and this lady's ass being incredible, I held onto the side rail and enjoyed a good minute of getting dry humped in the middle of a concert before stopping just in case I got caught/had to explain why I jizzed in my pants

This all happened at the same friends house over a course of 3 years.
>I'm 14-18
>Friends younger sister is 11-14
>She is not attractive.
>Also at her moms 1/2 the time
>Her room is always empty.
>Often go into her room and look through panties.
>Never jerked off in them or any of that shit
>Was very embarrased. Not only was she super young, but she was ugly.

>Same house.
>Same time period.
>We sleep in basement.
>Friends mom has a vent in bathroom.
>upstairs bathroom is clearly visible from basement
>jerk off several times looking up at her after showers.
>she has to know. eventually puts towel over vent.
>also very ugly.

underrated post!

There's a gaping feeling from being stretched out. That's probably something rapists aren't aware of.

>be me
>be 12 ish
>Stay over at aunt and uncles alot
>have cutie younger cousin
>not gonna say how young but definitely younger and qualifying as a hot loli
>mom and dad sleep in her room when we visit and she stays on the sectional part of the couch, our feet usually touch
>i just played games with her and watched movies for fun, normal older family member stuff
>found love of females from puberty and one night while staying over i got a huge boner thinking about her ass
>she was young, but her was Meaty, not fatty though, just like a good amount of muscle for her age. She loved tumbling and gymnastics
>wait until bedtime
>its around 3am and shes finally asleep
>everyone else is in bed and im still hard as fuck
>look at sleeping cousin, well call her Violet, or v for short
>v is on her stomach
>blankets are draped loosely halfway up her back
>i get up, poke her face to make sure shes asleep
>whispershername.jpeg
>triesagainbutslightlylouder.wav
>shes in deep sleep
>Pull blankets down
>pull pants down slightly
>do the usual experiment with panties and groping thing
>pull her panties down
>spread her asscheeks and hear her cheeks make a sticky sound from the sweat( it was hot wear my family lived)
>the aroma smells amazing and the sound made me harder than ever
>i turned a small flashlight that i had grabbed earlier on low setting and looked at her asshole
>i found out the was a messy wiper.
>never saw shit in her pantied when i stole them but her ass had specs near the hole.
>i said fuck it and started eating her dirty ass
>came in my pants after 2 minutes or so
>stick my tongue in slowly. Trying not to wake her up
>get it half way in but her ass is too tight and it makes my tongue start to cramp
>i think it was cutting off Circulation
>pull tongue out and grope her some more, its 4 by now
>get really hard again
>proceed to eat her ass a second time
>this time before cuming i decide i want to try to finger it
>Cont ?

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why were they so ugly? Was your friend ugly too?

keep going
Surprised a 12 yr old would be into a loli tho, I thought younger guys would be into older and more mature ladies

Are you the guy that posted the vid on pornhub?

Used a fish tank cleaning siphon as a dick pump to vacuum up the most veiny red raw erection. Cock achieved massive pressures. Felt like the veins were gonna burst. Cock didn't grow though :-( tfw stuck on 6 inches

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I mean, 14yo me would have fucked her for sure if I was in your position. If a girl got that far with me, no hesitation. I was ready to fuck anything at the time.
Did anything else happen?

Better be careful...the guy youre insulting will fuck your girl...then fuck you bro.

Double wammy

>eventually get my thumb in after working up from my pinky
>get really stupid and decide my dick is going in
>my horny twelve year old brain malfunctioned and i didnt realize my 5 and a half at the time was not the same as a thumb or middle finger at all
>head pops in and she wakes up and starts conplaining
>surprisingly shes not scared or angry, just upset i woke her up
>”user, what are you doing? What time is it? Can you stop it please that hurt”
>”yeah sorry v, its just well, you know i love you
>”yeah?”
>”and i know your kind of young and dont understand this kind of stuff, butt you are so amazing and beautiful and hot and i couldnt stop myself. Im sorry”
>”its okay, im not mad, it just hurt is all, why were you doing that anyway?”
>”well i got a really funny feeling in my, um my penis, and i wanted to have sex with you ( i didnt wanna break her hymen and i love butt stuff) but i didnt want to get you pregnant, so i tried putting it inside your butt instead”
>she says sex is scary and shes unsure if we should be doing that
>i calm her down and start making out with her
>sucking her toung and squeezing her ass
>cock is hard as diamonds rn
Ask her if i can lick and play with her ass again
>takes convincing but she agrees
>i start eating her ass and switch between small fingers and my tongue for a while
>shes moaning alot
>tell her she has to be more quiet so we dont get caught
>pull her pants down lower
>See the bottom of her pussy
>touch it lightly
>she jumps
>i calm her down and go again
>its sticky and wet
>it smells a little like piss but mostly like a salty sweet aroma i hadnt smelt before
>i started eating her pussy and kept going until she came
>she complained she was tired but i begged her to help me cum, she let me rub it against her pussy until i was read and i blew my load on her ass
>best orgasm yet, happiest id ever been

god that sounds like a hot time

held the wand of a pressure washer against my junk while using it to clean the driveway, came in about a minute

that sounds hot. I was too autistic as a kid to pull soemthing liek this off. I was so suppressed

Just a story she came up with to fuck you.

She is old and has a bad hip, i think i would break her

All they can do is foreplay...

Once tripped while,playing with a lego space ship I made, and the antenna (green translucent one) went under my top eyelid and about half an inch in. Didn't hurt at all, but scared the fuck out of me