why are you a positive person, or vice versa?
I want to do nice things for people and create a kinder life for my family and friends, but I'm weak to a dissassociating anger that often makes me say & do things that are contrary to those ideas. Should a person improve those flaws and feed the positive side of themselves or should a person stop caring and act as destructive/angry as they feel?
your mom gay lol
hey OP, i read somewhere that your moms gay. is it hot?
wish my mom gay
You don't have to go through the world all Kumbia but a "disassociating anger" is a serious flaw that needs to be corrected.
>I want to do nice things for people and create a kinder life for my family and friends, but I'm weak to a dissassociating anger that often makes me say & do things that are contrary to those ideas
dude you are me. I am truly "disturbed" and very much "down with the sickness" if you catch my drift.
Maybe if your mom wasn't gay you'd have a more positive outlook
wish i had an answer for you op. should is a tricky word. ya one probably should. personally i've only ever had one chance to actually do it and i was so overwhelmed by the change of circumstance I blew it anyways
You can form a habit of automatic positive thoughts. Catch it. Check it. Change it.
do i fit in now?
I needed these keks, thanks anons
- op
that's too bad, I'm sure another opportunity will present itself. What do you think you would have done differently ? I appreciate the post tho user
good philosophy ill give it a go cheers, ive been trying to confront negativity lately which is why I thought to post this thread so thats a start I guess
So serious answer from someone who used to be very negative and very pessimistic, but is how positive and optimistic. They key is two fold: one, start small. Start to let go of anger about small things. For example, I used to get really angry at stupid people (which there are a lot of) and all the stupid things they would say. So I started to try and ask myself "who cares? Does this really affect me? And if it does, is it worth getting pissed over". At first, I still got pissed a lot. But slowly, by asking myself that, I started to let some small stuff go. An idiot at work would screw up something, but I'd realize that they were the one that would work extra to fix it, so I'd let it go and not get angry or negative about it. The second part for me to change was to care. A lot of people do not care about anything but themselves these days. But, if you start to care about people and things, you'll find it's harder to be negative about them. Again, start small. Ask people their names, and legitimately care and try to remember them. It's harder than you'd think, if you're negative and pessimistic like I was. Then, once you know their names, start asking how they are, how their day is, ect. Basic questions everyone asks, but start to actually listen and care about what they say. You'll find yourself slowly actually giving a shit about their relationships ect. Once you do, it's harder to be negative about these people. Then expand your caring. Start caring about work, even if it's a crap job. You'll find your bosses love it, because most people do not care, especially about work. Soon you'll find people think you're a kind, caring individual who is positive, and what's more soon you'll find that yeah, they're right. You do care. You are possitive.
im not reading all that
thanks a lot my guy, I needed this. I appreciate the time you took to answer my random questions, Im going to put a lot of this into practice.
Good! Trust me, I was living a very unhappy life. Min wage, no gf, very negative and unhappy. With effort I've gotten a job that I like and pays well, s wife, and I'm a relatively happy person. You have already begun to change by simply knowing that you're negative and wanting to change. That's a big first step many people never get to! Keep strong, and keep patient!
I really turned my whole life around there for about a year, but now I'm just right back where I was before. My anger is at my parents for shaming and humiliating me growing up, and even still today. My home life is a trap and it keeps pulling me back in.
I wish I had kept in touch with the people I met. I wish I had gotten out of this trap, and not stayed in it just for the sake of the financial security it offers. I wish I had had a goal. I was just overwhelmed and going day to day. I got bored and frustrated and devalued how well things were going for me. I had no frame of reference. Everytime, it comes back to this sheltering abusive setting of my home. I'm shamed for being here, but told I never have to leave. I'm humiliated by being here, but it's completely safe. It's stagnant, but comfortable. I don't know. Maybe I can't do any differently than I did. Maybe you can't be something you're not. I just don't know man. I wish I had an answer for you.
this is good stuff
I'm in a fairly similar position, but trying to build a career to get out- Do you work by any chance? If they dont demand much rent or any charges then you could save up enough to absolutely change your life. I really wish you the best tho user dont fall into the comforting stagnation again remember the good year you had and understand you can have it again and prolong it with a new approach / situation.
This hit all the feels.
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