That's it. I'm done being a NEET. For 31 years I've swallowed the tendie pill and my life has been mostly shit...

More of him

Behind the replies you were giving lays your answer user. Sure they were rude but this is Yea Forums and no one has told you to kill yourself yet, there is no future for you exept working at some fast food chain or maybe wallmart, this is your sad reality so face it.

Thanks for the support user

>Jack the ripper
KEK such a good name for the King

HAW HAW HAW Eatin fuckin mayonnaise n beans god damn

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https:/
/thisvid.
com
/videos/king-ass-ripper-fart-montage/

Powned

Zing

Have you tried getting a loan?

>swallowed the tendie pill

I think of the physical characteristics of it and realize OP just orbited my sides...

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Or behind curtain 3 is the rope, assuming it can hold his fat ass

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Get on welfare if you aren't already, then get an off the books job at a warehouse or something.

Without improving yourself in some way, you probably are going to have to do some low end jobs.

As others have suggested, fast food or maybe cashier?

I would suggest doing that while you work on other aspects of your life and keep improving everything, including your job one day.

Thanks for some actual fucking advice.

Bump

I kinda hope you just die...is that a good tip?

I remember those days user..
First and foremost, you're going to need to straighten yourself out. Get down to "slightly overweigh", as soon as you can, because without any kind of schoolings, manual labor is your best bet. Always looking, and if you can understand simple directions, you'll stick around.
That's a goal you can set for yourself, and work towards. Getting up and going to work everyday, even if it's only a part time job, will certainly help you get more in shape, even if only a little. It's a step.
Hit up craigslist. It's basically the new Want ad's, where you used to find jobs and shit in the news papers. I got a job for Amazon and a few years ago DHL, just by checking the job postings on craigslist every day.
Now, you're not going to find something on your first look. Unless you're lucky. I used to get way way back, almost a month, into the postings, and applied to any and everything I think I could do/had the required experience for. Then, you start getting to just the ones posted same day, and start sending to them, too. It'll be slow, and you might get frustrated, but at least you're trying. If you live in a decently populated area, start walking around as far as you can, and see if any place is hiring. If you have a vehicle, even better. You can drive out to the more business oriented parts of town, and walk around there. Or the industrial parts, warehouses are always looking for workers. The turnover rate at most of them is usually high, so it would be easier to land a job in there, but the work would be harder, I'm sure.
Beyond all that advice, don't give up. Because it will be daunting, and you will want to just slide back into your usual activities. Not saying abandon your old lifestyle, just... use it in, moderation. Half the day spent looking for work, broken up into an hour here an hour there, half the day doing your usual.
Once you start working, and having your own funds to just.. have, things will start to look better.

It's actually "King ass ripper" or "hairy n gross" or "gluttonous slob" or "Ifartinyoface"

How have you been a neet for over ten years and not have taught yourself some sort of marketable skill

Thanks user

I just failed at everything i tried right out of the gate after high school because of addiction issues then i got clean but just stayed hermetically sealed at home and jacked off to traps and played vidya for a decade and change

I used to be in the same boat, besides the fat. Now I'm working in a catch basin/sewer/septic "cleaning" business. Lol, it's quite literally one of the shittiest jobs I've had. Pun most certainly intended. But I'm on my way to getting my CDL, and a hefty 10+ dollar raise once I pass that test. And that's just the first few months after. That'll keep going up and up as long as I keep on. But then there's more responsibility, and now I have to drive those fuckin trucks, and learn every single moving part, and what they do, and how they all could kill me or anybody around. And always trying not to fall down an open manhole, or curbside grate, or fucking water well.
Once you start, it'll only get easier. Once you land that first job, however shitty it'll be, it'll hopefully motivate you, into getting something else, better. Bigger. Doing more with your time, and actively contributing to something that you see as worth while. Or at least to stick it out and get tougher, simply because you're working now.
Good luck user. There totally is something out there for you, you just need to look for it.

That guy is fucking hilarious, I want to know whatever happened to him, I think he stopped posting videos on LiveLeak, there was another guy around the time called surveillance man that was pretty funny too but I think he got banned for some kind of public law violation we're going into private places or he got killed

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Thanks

Drive for Uber you fat fuck

Your moms house podcast killed the King. To be fair they just tried to give him due credit but they fucked up by mentioning him on Joe Rogan.. he understandably fled and was scarcely heard from again. He probably had to move and get a new job

First things first. Get a job. Any job you can. It doesn't matter what it is. You need to start making some money. You have to work your way up to becoming something. Start to build a skill set, there are many online resources. Shit, even the $2500 training my job bought for me is worse than most free shit on YouTube. Start looking into healthy eating habits. Healthful food is much cheaper than junk food. Start to go for walks. Hit 10k steps per day, download a pedometer app.

>Healthful food is much cheaper than junk food.
No it ain't

It is, lean proteins and frozen veg that keeps you full for hours costs less than $30 a week... Big loads of carbs and sugar and shit like pizza and fast food just make you crash and feel hungry an hour later, and it always costs more to eat fast food garbage than to cook at home

Veggies and potatoes are dirt cheap. Fruit, usually not so much (at least, not where I am. But a thing of strawberries is about as expensive as a bag of brand-name chips). If you go full Soup Life, you can live on a pocket-change budget. Enough of this "poor people can't afford to eat healthy food" meme. Just don't shop at Whole Foods LUL.

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work with dogs, lose weight. youll never be shit with weight

>saying "up yours" at 31
>or ever

jesus dude get a hold of yourself

Try a call center. Or a place where you use Dragon software to live-translate phone calls for deaf fags. Word of advice: don't sell yourself well in the interview. They WANT to hire pieces of shit who are done with life. Not even joking.

confirmed neet for life.

veggies that aren't pumped full of chemicals and preservatives aren't that cheap. Which is why people like op just go for the ramen and kraft mac n cheese

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>veggies that aren't pumped full of chemicals
Ok alex jones don't eat vegetables, removd yourself from gene pool

that is not WHY people go for shit-food. what an excuse.
eating celery and cabbage and potatoes that're tainted with preservatives and pestocides is still better than eating maruchan ramen and flaming hot cheetos everyday.
it's certainly easier to put those oreos in your cart than a thing a blueberries, i'll give you that. but they're really not that much different in price. and one of them only makes you want to eat more shit-food.
how many people do you think have actually died from eating processed veggies compared to french fries and kraft?

>Not being familiar with Blazing Saddles
Ok, fortnite playing millennial faggot

Why is this? I never really see fat fucks in good jobs

the only millenials who play fortnite are faggoty twitch streamers with pink hair and an affinity for trap porn.
you're thinking of gen z

This thread gave me cancer, but it's cool because I can get paid to try out experimental treatments. Good luck, OP!

Preservatives isn't a conspiracy theory you mongoloid. At least I think frogs should be heterosexual.