I have a question for you Yea Forums
What is the weirdest thing you have ever stuck your dick in?
Here’s mine:
>be me
>14
>eating toast
>horny
>for some reason I realize that butter would be amazing
>open a brand new butter and just start fucking it
>cum in the butter
>feel immediate shame
A condom filled with my own poop
yuck.
Bumping this because im laughing so hard and need more replies
Obviously, your mom.
Dee chord a pineapple ...thing looked just the right size figure I'd give it a try I was just going to make fruit salad for a workplace party anyway so we really couldn't give a fuk about 30 second in and my pee hole immediate burning feeling that lasted for 20 minutes yea stupid
Microwaved a pumpkin after making a hole ram my dick in side pull out as fast as I can it was to hot and burned my dick it blister up and everything
A glove full of water
A napkin box
A empty finger glove
All felt not that great the hand is better
Plastic monouse glove I mean
a sandwich, and I ate later
Bump
Green text?
was it pb and j
My little sisters ass
Not inside. But I put some butter on my dick and let my (female) hamster lick it. I was 12y
Thought it would be fun to put donuts on my dick, didn’t live up to the hype
In a glory hole while in a porn store video arcade. Yeah it was probably a guy on the other side that sucked my cock, but it was one of the best BJs I've ever had.
Been thinking about trying this
I worked up the nerve to go back and tray again. One time there was this old guy that just followed me around back there. He creeped me out so I left. Another time there was a guy in drag sucking cock through GHs back there. There was a bit of a crowd around that booth, and the porn store was yelling at people to stop loitering around. I ended up leaving. The third time I went back, the GHs where all covered up. There was a sign hanging up that said something about new community decentcy laws that went into effect at the beginning of the month.
Wow... Just Wow! - Donald J. Trump
I tried to fuck the family cat when I was like 11 or something
>room temp jello
>warm oat meal
>a warm watermelon
>homemade flesh light
>my parents pillow
>my mattress
nice
did it feel good?
Hot pocket. I came
Plastic sandwich bag (not the kind with the zip lock)
I had this weird thing as a teen where I hated getting my hand messy from masterbating. So I'd pour some lube into a baggie and jack off that way.
I wrapped my cock in one of this once
you mean peanut butter and Jizz?
I made that pringles can vagina from the guide.
Pretty meh experience but had some fun putting this thing together.
An M320 grenade launcher while deployed. Broke ~year nofap to it, possibly the most satisfying nut I’ve ever had, after that I tried the trigger wells too.
a trap
snow
You love the cock dont you? You dirty sheep fucker.
>sheep
wut
Mmmm...Reminds me of this Glory Hole!
Weirdest thing I stuck 'in' my dick..
A raw guinea hen. The spine scratched my dick up a little but there wasn’t any bleeding or anything. Came in it and threw it away. We were short one for that thanksgiving.
"Come for the masturbation, stay for the home improvement!"
Holy Shit! Lady GaGa looks like Shit!
the tablecloth of a table at a restaurant while waiting for the food
Noice!
Spencer?
my hand when it had a big callus from gymnastics
felt like i was wearing dishwashing gloves. came anyway, and made a not to fix my grip on the rings
Inside my family heirloom finger box.
An industrial sausage twister. Coworkers were out on break so I slid in when I got a chance.
how could you disrespect a fingerbox like that?
greentext
Mostly animals. Here's the list.
Horse ( both male and female)
Sheep ( both male and female)
Deer (female while it was alive and both as roadkill)
Possum ( male only, surprisingly they can take some sick)
Racoon (same as possum)
Buzzard (throat fuck, it was pretty kick ass)
Cow and calf (female both)
Dog (male and female. Female is better when in heat)
Carp (blowjob, I came but do not recommend very slimy and unsatisfactory)
Thats about it, not ashamed of the humans ive stuck my dick in.
I'm the sickest fucker in here so far, bow to me
Oh, and a female fox anal once, didnt work out well for her they are kinda small.
you had one chance at life and you used it to fuck roadkill
Vids?
She die?
Where did you fuck a horse
Advice?
I've tried dogs but could never put it in since they're small
Gonna need those answers bro
A legendary man known as Sea Dog Fucker claimed to fuck dog however he wanted even if it killed them, then throw em off a boat when he was done. I choose to believe him
A 10 pound bag of scallops. Busted an excellent nut by the way
A cow’s liver. I sliced a fuck hole in it, put it in the microwave for 30 seconds, then fucked the shit out of it!
My little brothers ass. I’m not proud of myself
And human girls too. They were alive, no dead ones...yet.
A few of the dead deer, some dead beat in the /trash/ feral thread was working on a live deer vid but never delivered. I'll do it this deer season, got a trap idea ready to go.
Yep, but not from the D. She was going to be a hat lineing anyway, I trap for fur.
Ive dicked a beagel before, so that's as small as I could go. As for horses, I fenced hopped before, but lucked out when my buddy moved to a farm that had tons of mares.
Those leather dress type gloves with the rabbit fur inside. Man, you gotta try it!
Jessi Slaughter
I've thought about this...
Bro post some of the deer
what the fuck is a buzzard
The buzzard must've been superb
You do some weird shit growing up on a farm.
That's all I'm going to say.
Wifes friend’s down feather jacket. Used the sleeve as a fleshlite, she wore the jacket later that day, luckily my cum dried by then.
Dog mouth, and sister's water bottle. I only did the water bottle to piss in tho
OP tells a story about using butter to masturbate:
gets one-upped by bestiality and incest.