W-Welcome back to Cooking with Alice3D, Home Cooked Meal Edition!

Okay! This time it's just salt and pepper, baby!
Like I said, no suggested amount...other than to taste!

vocaroo.com/i/s04s5E0j0rH6

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Time to mix all the spices together so they make a nice, even rub!

vocaroo.com/i/s0FxeNbAzKHV

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Pat the chicken dry, both inside and out.
I'll spare you the less than nice camera angle that this chicken has...

vocaroo.com/i/s05b63xzUtCN

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Rub the mixed spices all over the chicken so that it creates a nice, even crust over the chicken that will seal in all the juices.

vocaroo.com/i/s05b63xzUtCN

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Put the chicken on the foil rack (or snake) and then set the temperature to HIGH For 4-5 hours, or until the chicken juices run clear and it's reached a safe temperature to eat, which is 165F.

vocaroo.com/i/s0sy7cZTRjrt

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I'll pat your chicken.

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Moving over the the potatoes, pierce them 2-3 times to allow some of the steam to escape, and you keep your potatoes from blowing up.

Hidden within this vocaroo is a little gem of knowledge, to those who choose to listen..
vocaroo.com/i/s0sxgobITh4L (don't try to boil eggs in the microwave, they'll explode)

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Oil up those potatoes like you wish you could some hot womans back.
Then, salt them (not with your tears, no one wants those).
Throw them in the oven for 45 minutes on a foiled baking sheet. Enjoy with butter and sour cream, or load it up. Your choice.

vocaroo.com/i/s0IxTxB0FbNo

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And...voila! Dinner is served. Thanks for joining me, Anonymous! I hope to see you next time

Attached: 19-DinnerIsServed.webm (1280x720, 1.93M)

> never shows her face
> filmed on a green screen

probably the ugliest fucking bitch in some rat infested ghetto

I used t-to film in my actual apartment, b-but then I got death threats

For me it's not the green screen, the voice, or even the level of effort put in this thread that creeps me out. For me, it's the fucking black plate and dark utensils. This is psycho.

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Are you s-serious? They are d-dark blue/gray, I j-just saturated t-the colors a bit to make it easier to color key.

Plus, I mean, if you are creeped out by /effort/, that...says a lot about you, not me.

WHAT THE FUCK I CAN SMELL IT I CAN SMELL IT RIGHT NOW

THIS SHIT IS CURSED GUYS LEAVE WHILE YOU STILL CAN

op is obviously a cute girl (male)
those shoulders
that voice
those hands and arm lengths
am i kawaii uguu anime trash
posting on Yea Forums

You're right. I'm sorry. I really appreciate this tutorial you have made for us. I think years on this site have just rotted away my ability to love something earnestly and unironically, and so I try my best to make everything seem like it was intended as a joke, when this clearly wasn't.

Thank you, Cookingchan. I love you.

don't you have anything better to do, you depressing tranny bitch

I'm a b-biological female, but alright.

T-this is at least better than the "black plates makes you a psycho" comment.

I've b-been here since 2004 d-dear, and let me tell you, if you are feeling that way...m-maybe you should take a break from this place.

I love you too Anonymous. Don't let this place get to you.

I'm n-not a tranny, sorry.

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Please show the benis

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D-don't have one

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-eeks and hurries into this thread to clean up as well! Double dishes tonight- x_x

you do realize no one follows/cares about your lonely depressing ass cooking rp, and if you are a real female as you claim then why don't you find a fucking guy and spend your time with him instead of making these threads?

Pussy? I already ate, or otherwise I would be nutting over that delicious chicken rn nowhaimean?

W-why don't you find a girl and spend t-time with her rather than asking m-me questions in a thread?

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I d-don't, but I'm glad t-to hear you are well fed

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Why u writing that way do

Fucking cringe

I disagree with this man's opinion.

Why do you think having a boyfriend would be the pinnacle of a girl's use of her time?

- enjoys Alice's threads very much and has tried numerous recipes!-

No pussy? Why not?

I g-guess we'll both have to disagree w-with the others style, dear

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I followed her on youtube explicitly for her cooking videos

Omg Alice is so cute holy shit

I m-mean I don't "know what you mean"

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Virgin detected

Sex doll edition cooking.

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>refuses to take my advice and just reflects the question back at me
I mean clearly you have some form of mental illness but that's no excuse why you cant find a guy

POST YT POST YT POST YT

Oddly enough just these days I was wondering where you have been and how you where doing.

Never had replied to your threads but I always read them.
Kinda glad you still doing fine.

what? for saying that a woman might have higher aspirations than being in a relationship?

Goddamn it no one does. That's why I thought you would.

..yes.

Virgin opinion is that relationships are supposed to be the goal

At least she uses that illness for the greater good. What the fuck have you done with yours? NOTHING.

thank you for this

God bless isolation. It'll cause me severe mental issues but better than dealing with people. Drugs do help as well.

T-that was advice? Huh? It l-looks like more of a question to me.

As well, I don't t-think asking a question back is a sign of mental illness. I c-can't find it in the ICD-10 or DSM-5.

Here: youtube.com/watch?v=nWyjoMb04tM&list=PLyT82Ckr2Mb74Pw8ZJZ61o57Ax5sg3vZw

I d-do my best to help Anonymous even now

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Samefagging so hard

not falling for your weak b8
why do you need alice for recipes you have fucking google
Im probably the only sane one on this cancer shithole

I'll s-say this then. I'm a woman, and I h-have higher aspirations than b-being in a relationship.

That's my choice, and it has nothing to do with why I make these threads.

It's m-my honor.

I d-don't think it's better.

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herpa derpa doo

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>only sane one
>thinks a womans worth is only in a relationship
yeah alright.

google isn't very reliable. everything alice has made in the last three years has always been great!

Well one thing's for sure: I'm definitely not xP

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-doesn't NEED Alice for recipes. Enjoys her company and the fun she brings to cooking! Food is for sharing-

You say that, but considering other comments you are alone. So why should I not want to aspire to maintain being alone and only deal with people on a need to need basis?

>What is the source code and how to I edit it?
>What is image manipulation?

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God fucking damn it there's only 13 posters in this thread?

I'm n-not alone

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Is it kosher?

Are you that paranoid that you think I'd waste time doing either of those things rather than to think that just 2 or more people don't share your batshit stupid opinion about women?

I don't consider anons on Yea Forums to fill the requirement of "not being alone" Coworkers don't count either

Oh, you're an incel. You could have just said as much from the start and saved us all a heap of trouble.

Smells like a seven layer.

then you're alone you fucking retarded bitch

You t2f? I'm gonna fill that boipussy with more love then even those potatoes have come to know in their tender oil basting

Maybe

ARGUING WITH HOLES

Women are bodily weak and mentally inferior, therefore the only way they can win fights is to SUCH MY DICH LMFAO FDQEUET

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It's at an odd t-time.

It's c-chicken, so as long as you have kosher chicken....

R-right, that would be my strong IRL relationships

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Same

hey alice, i need some help.

i want to start a cult-orbiters club too.
right now im having troubles with my cult-points system, can you give me some tips? i mean i cant buy right now cars or tv for my soyboys, im thinking more like games from soysteam.

also i need to buy 2 cucks like kermit the cuck so they can whiteknight online for me the whole day. how many cult-point you give to kermit per whiteknight session?
also i need 1 faggot like captain cuck.
and a few traps.
my point is where did you buy them? how many points do you give them daily?

please take in consideration that i cant whore myself with dresses and stuff since
1. im dont want that kind of attention.
2. im not a trap like you.

feminazis and liberal scum love to name call to piss others off and then yell rape if you do it them them, you're more pathetic then alice so off yourself whore

Oh god wrist scars, we got a fucking cutter faggot.

Just die already

Cute bird

>So I lack a boipussy.
Sadface

Are you fucking stupid?

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W-what? I don't cut, are you s-serious?

S-sorry dear

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Okay thank you. My jewish wife will surely love it.

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Someone..typed this.

M-my pleasure

Incel 100% describes the way you think. You've done so poorly with women that you developed a big ol web of garbage psychology theories to comfort you into thinking it's the world and not you being a shitty person that keeps you from getting the attention you craved as a teenager. Just like all the other incels.

Well, I don't have any. So isolation is my salvation. Just need to learn to cut the need for socializing out of me.

So like, I don't want to overstep my boundaries. But can you explain the stutter?

How did this start as a cooking tutorial?

Shut up faggot YOURE CUTE

It blows my mind

my small bird brain

my avian dome = gone

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you're depressing and dead inside and making these threads is your only meaning in life and if you couldn't do that you would kys am I right?
keep name calling you whore see where that will take you in life (single, fat and childless in your 40s)

ok incel

>>>/ignored/

nah its called I don't worship/let pussy control me

based birb

I don't see how namecalling would make me fat nor how either of the other two grim fates you assigned to me are bad things in any way.

You c-can't do that

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vocaroo.com/i/s1n9ShubVZ8x

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People do it all the time and fight their urges and needs. Why should socialization be any different?

you live in a fantasy world, seek mental help and stop coming here

It's s-somewhat hard to fight the need for food, water, air, and shelter. Socialization is about equal t-to those in importance for a group species.

I'm r-reasonably sure I live in the real world dear. W-where is your evidence for your claims?

And no, I won't stop. Sorry.

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Thank you pajeet for your parting words of wisdom

this doesn't make you happy so stop lying to yourself and others and do something that actually does and stop wasting your time

What is homeless and bulimia for 400?
It wouldn't be hard. Half way to finishing my taser project. This will help me associate social need to a negative attribute.

what?

I n-never said this made m-me happy, but I'm also n-not sure why you think "makes me happy" is t-the only reason I have to do things?

That seems like a very self centered view, Anonymous.

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Fascinating

That is the opposite of a good thing you should not do exactly that

No man is an island my dude, even if the peninsula is an electric fence, you are here

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R-right, two groups with extremely high risks. That's exactly m-my point.

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why the fuck else would you do it
deep shit

-hopes you do lots of things that make you happy- :

It will be a good thing for me.

But they do it. I'll accept those risks if it reaches my goal

Can you r-really think of no reason to do something besides f-for your own personal happiness?

I'm not sure what to say, Anonymous. But if that's the case, it's not me who is in need of a mental health professional.

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pERHAPS YOU SHOULD DO SOME MORE IN-DEPTH COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS OF REACHING YOUR GOAL BEFORE PERUSING IT

IT does not seem to your peers to be a particularly good idea, even for you

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You'd r-rather commit suicide than talk t-to others?

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shut up retard

humans are greedy by nature so they only do shit that makes themselves happy so you're no different, prove me wrong

bad bait, try harder next time

keep sucking alices dick and maybe she will return the favor
how is that b8?

W-well, I'd r-rather not get into psychology, but have you ever heard of kinship selection and b-biological altruism?

I think you'll find humans are a bit more nuanced than "greedy by nature". We're a social species; we work to cooperate by our very nature.

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I have no peers. So why should I care what they think.

No one is committing suicide.

I d-don't have a dick.

most humans don't give 2 shits about anyone else, why would they

T-those with bulimia and who are homeless d-do at a dramatically increased rate, dear.

Those were the risks I was talking about

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-nibbles a piece of chikin quietly in the kitchen- :3

I d-disagree. As I s-said, humans are a collective and social species. Civilization itself is "working for the common good".

That's indeed why kinship selection and biological altruism exist, after all.

That said, if you can't see any reason why I or any other human would care about other humans, then I'm q-quite sure the person with problems in this conversation isn't me, as you posited.

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I hope OP is having a good day

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Well if suicide is that that path leads to then fine with me I will embrace it.

I would r-recommend not doing so, Anonymous.

*hugs tightly* d-doing my best

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Well thank you but I am not concerned about your recommendations. My path is set and I am ready to go down it.

Its a dude

S-sorry, I'm a biological female

hard times when the alice faggot has to repost his older cooking shit for attention

custom pack of reacts, active 24/7, growing constantly

bFeKS6z

Hi Alice

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Don't worry I'll fix it for you
Nelix alacarte

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Do you still post regularly, Alice? I remember seeing you post threads here very frequently back when I browsed Yea Forums a few years back.

Also I hope you're having a good day in spite of all the rude anons

Less frequently than back then but at least once a week or more it seems like

what are your aspirations and goals?

Daily Reminder: Alice is a man.

Nothing like old Alice. At least she isn't so prying to fix people's problems like before.

Never established, don't know why you waste your time with this crap

except he is

He still does, and it's pathetic.

tits or gtfo

As the intermediate Alice between her and the original, I'd say she improved things by actually trying to help.

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love Is for weak pussies and its not nessisary for life

Do you guys have a discord server or something?

Oh look, an orbitor...

The lack of tits in this thread is disgusting. OP is a fag.

u should kys

Is it really orbiting if this all came from me?

I'm really sorry that you feel that jaded, but it's simply not true.

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-brings you tea- ^-^

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Reimu trying to justify orbiting by pretending to have been an Alice again

This is so sad

I remember when she used to pretend to be Alice1

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good evening princess

There's no pretending about it. I've been upfront and clear about everything that happened during 2011. You weren't there yet, either, so kindly stop trying to stir shit.

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None of these larping fags are alice. He posted these vids 2 days ago, like the timestamp says

Good evening, and goodbye. I'm off to watch Youtube and relax for the night~

If anyone wants answers about the past that don't matter anymore, you can hear it from me:
tarot.reimu@gmail

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Imagine the fatass neckbeard who posted this lmao

-waves goodnight to you and looks around the thread nervously-

sum1 explain all this alice 1 & 2 drama to me

just some delusional weeb

who is and y? more details pls

I was definitely around when you pretended to have been Alice1 as a way of trying to uphold some kind of apostolic succession of Alices meme

I guess you decided that claiming to have been an "intermediate Alice" is more believable

Alice Infinity (the true and best Alice) left a long time ago

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This is already too much work. Fuck off, you fake stuttering cow.

I too go on
>>/ck/