Secrets breads

secrets breads

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i'm a syssy boy

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nice digits

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trip$

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I want to travel back in time and find a cave woman with wide hips and huge tits. She would have to take me back to her cave to meet her mom, who would have to watch and maintain eye contact with her daughter while I fucked said cave woman from behind. Her mom would have to ask her daughter when she was about to cum, things like that.

Afterwards we would have a meal together and the cave mother would give me a bj and together, cave daughter and I would make the mother orgasm.

After all this, I have to explain that I actually work for the CIA (that's where the time machine came from) and that I have to return. But right before I do, niggers attack the nearby settlement and we all have to escape into the future even though cave people aren't supposed to do this.

At the end the two women have to remain my sex slaves since they can't adapt to modern society and we travel across Europe in secret, looking for relics of the past and fucking, guided by a time-space-continuum robot/android who resembles Robin Williams but is actually a ghost.

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i like crossdressing

virgin

i used to watch cp with a friend of mine

that friend gave me a handjob once when we were horny

i use to post whores' pics i know irl in souldnt share threads

i liked to fap to doraemon hentai as a kid

i unironically want to be fucked by a nigger

im trying to become femboy

i like dildos

i like making homemade fleshlights

im addicted to sexting

i have a few gypsy distant relatives

i can suck my own dick

i have a deformation in the ribs

i sometimes fap to mare porn

i like to get inside closets and big drawers where i am surrounded by darkness and complete silence

i want to fuck my cousin, she is sooooo hot

i use to harm myself when im angry

I'd fuck you. I like virgin weirdos. Not a nigger, though.

I actually have two boyfriends at the moment. Life is fucked. Good, but fucked.

faggot

I’m 34 I’ve been fucking my 14yr old and up employees for a long time. I think the thrill of it all out weighs all the potential life destroying consequences for me

A close religious friend confided in me that she lost her virginity. I'm not religious so I didn't judge or anything but she was conflicted about it and felt guilty. Anyway a few months later we were talking and she told me she was super horny and just needed to have sex to get over it. I jokingly suggested me and she kinda laughed. The topic changed but maybe 10 minutes later she asked me point blank if wanted to fuck. I said sure. She had a bit of a butter face but a great body. She was a bit crazy in bed, and we had a fun night.

I'm the one who puts coffee into the sugar bol at work

I service teslas and do barely none of service items as I know they will run to 150,000 miles before anything bad actually breaks down. Corporate has recommended this.

I'm building the new game of thrones studio tour in the UK and steal heaps of props and sell them online. I've enough to buy a good car now.

I saw the Queen smoking.

>Part of a blended family
>Step-mom and half sister
>Good days I'm ignored
>Bad days I'm treated like shit
>Even Dad gives me shit all the time
>Little sister is perfect, can do no wrong
>One Direction is coming to town (yeah, I'm that old)
>Sister huge fan
>Dad manages to win tickets and meet & greet on radio
>Night of show, I see tickets and passes on kitchen table
>Fuck this
>Grab them and stick them down my pants
>Everyone freaks out, trying to find them
>Tear the whole house apart, and the cars
>They made me look too, I'm trying to to laugh
>Sister is crushed
>Parents blame each other for losing them
>Huge fight, lasts for days
>Stepmom and sis both leave
>Divorce!
>Dad, who was always a chad, becomes husk of former self
>Drinks, loses job
>"Those goddamn tickets! If I could only have found those goddamn tickets!"
>He cries for years about it
>I move out and move on with life
>Last year, after his 5th DUI, pick him up, drive him directly to rehab
>"Dad, you ever think maybe if you treated me better things would have gone better for you? Maybe you should have stuck up for me when Stepmom was putting me down?"
>"What? I treated you fine. She was right, you were a screwup!"
>"Okay, Dad."
>Get him checked into rehab
>"Here," I say and hand him an envelope. "You've been looking for these."
>Turn and walk out the door, knowing it's the last time I'll ever see him.
>Can hear him start to scream, cursing me
>Gets roughed up by security.
Fuck you Dad, Fuck you Trisha, and fuck you Amber.

I cheated to have a big titted goth girl. She was an excellent fuck, was great at sucking cock and now that, many years later, I'm single she isn't with us anymore.

My entire life is a lie. Everyone in my life, from my gf to my parents toy boss, thinks so highly of me. They think I'm a normal, well adjusted, mild mannered man.

In reality I'm a degenerate pervert who posts on /pol/, thinks all non whites should die, faps to loli, hails Hitler and just about every other neckbeard activity you can think of.

I have no idea how i'm able to hide it so well.

Pic unrelated, have a good laugh

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Crack?

Aye, I remember you from last night.

Nah cigarettes

Cock.

When I was 17, I dated a 13 year old girl that was obsessed with me. Fucked her plenty and she was freaky as fuck. We sent a lot of nudes to each other. I love talking about her so I'll answer any questions.

I let Pakistani boys 'buy' me as their girlfriend for a period of time.

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You're absolutely foul.

Dude....epic. I really hope this is true.

i shit in the urinal one time at school
some kids got caught with pot in the same bathroom mere minutes later, they got in trouble for shitting in the urinal and i didn't.

Was her name Ayesha?

Nope.

fucked my sisters friend in front of my sister

That’s only 4 years apart it’s not that weird. That’s basically a senior dating a freshman.

Once when I was walking down the street with some friends when I saw some homeless dude throw a backpack behind a dumpster and take off running from the cops. I proceeded to steal said backpack. It had his wallet and pretty much everything he owned in it. I stole the last $10 out of it, his drivers liscense, social security, some gift cards, and about half a gram of heroin.

Good read, user.

Although I don't consider it strange, many would consider a senior dating a freshman taboo. However, it's mostly the age when we started dating, she was in 7th/8th grade.

I'm "straight" and 18 with a gf, but I like sexting like a cum slut to guys

>be 16
>snoop around on mom's phone out of curiosity
>find out she's been fucking our neighbor and cheating on my dad
>get hard from knowing that and jerk off

was she good at sex. what kind of sexual favors did she do for u

It was awkward the first few times because it was our first, but god damn the rest was amazing. Knowing her age also had me diamonds. She'd suck me, bend over, grind up against me, etc.

Aye

what happened after? Do you still fuck her? how old is she now?

Reposting story since I don't think I'll ever do a greentext.

I got handjobs, anal penetration, and a few blowjobs from my younger sister when I was a teen.

>be me, extremely horny and a sexual degenerate 14 year old that jerked off multiple times a day
>have a sister at the time, 11
>I developed some strange fetishes, one was incest so I wasn't opposed to doing that stuff

>convinced her to bend over for me so i can grab her ass, and jerk off to it
>convinced her to give me handjobs and finish me many times while she was naked
>thighfucked her
>i accidentally came in her ass, also first and only time i penetrated

>stopped when I was 16 and she was 13

how do you two get along now? Do you still do anything with each other? Do you still ever talk about what happened? Or just pretend it never did?

It slowly fizzled out, she lived 40 minutes away and I was talking to another girl where I lived that I could actually have a future with. Even though we broke up and I got a new gf, I still used her for nudes and fucked around. She mostly stopped when she got a new bf, and sent me a few nudes before completely ghosting me. She's 15 now.

When I was 18, I dated a 12 year old who was crushing on me hard. If her parents ever knew, they would have (understandably) had me arrested. We used to meet up at a local park and shoot out of town for the day in my car. It was more than thirty years ago, and I still remember every curve of her body and how her skin tasted and how her hair smelled.

It's eh right now, a little awkward around each other. We still mention it every now and then, but we act as if nothing happened. I'm trying to get her to give me handjobs again though.

Nostalgia man. Without a doubt in my life, I'll still think of her in the future. It was easily one of the best decisions of my life, no regrets.

Around 2010 a friend invited me to a meeting he'd organized through CL. I didn't have much experience with girls squirting until that night, when it must've happened 15-20 times. Wasn't until afterwards that we both learned she was underage.

i love feel good stories like this

Story?

my sister actually suggested it. She knew her friend was going though a dry spell and convinced her to fuck me. Then she asked if she could watch.

I spent 2 years commited to a relationship with my cheating gf just for the sole purpose of destroying her life when I dumped her right before getting married. it worked and shit was so cash.

How was it for everyone involved?

Hey! I remember your story, too. I think I might be spending too much time in these threads, eh?

I caught my younger sister sending nudes to older boys at her school and groomed her into being a cam whore for paying customers.

pretty good. We were all a bit drunk. I kinda forgot my sister was there and just enjoyed fucking her friend. But I did see her with her hand in her pants enjoying herself at one point

What was your relationship like that after? Did you ever see the friend again?

yeah, friend and I have hooked up a few more times in private. My sister and I just avoid talking about it and its all been good.

>used to fuck this girl while she was dating my friend, stopped when they got engaged

>used to smoke weed with my rabbi (inb4 kike)

>once stole a friend's panties and would masturbate with them on my face

>own several dildos and buttplugs

>once crashed into a parked Porsche in a parking lot, totaled the thing and drove away with no consequence

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I like to ride the bike around hotels at night and look into the windows at people

I do this but with houses.

I know, me too. I came back after 4 years of not browsing Yea Forums and I'm loving these threads.