It's 3am and I can't sleep so I think I need to get this off my chest

It's 3am and I can't sleep so I think I need to get this off my chest

>be me
>14
>poor
>be going to school full of rich kids
>one day a guy i was sort of friends with asks me why im wearing shitty shoes
>laugh it off as if i dont care
>go home and beg mum for good shoes
>she buys me them and I show them off and feel happy
>fast forward to 16
>deep into fake clothing and shoes
>have 10+ indistinguishable designer outfits
>be known as mega rich kid
>beg parents to spend a tonne of money on good tech for me
>they oblige
>new girl comes to school
>become best friends throughout a year
>develop a crush on her
>fast forward to now
>18, school over
>we're going to different universities
>really don't want to lose her but my entire personality is based on a lie
>realise i've fallen in love with her
>realise i can never be with her because im a lying piece of shit
>legitimately consider ending everything
>cant sleep
>go on Yea Forums and post this for a bunch of faggots to tell me to kill myself

pic related - me right now

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Don’t worry, user. Summer is almost over.

off with you to bed, peasant boy

Why tf would you do that tho

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i dont think my feeling will die for her though

i was a dumb 14 year old who didn't want to be seen as poor

post pics of her holes

stfu retard

i don't understand what you mean by yr whole personality is a lie
yr whole personality is yr fake designer clothes? wtf is wrong w u

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as in how i talk, how i walk, how i present myself. it's all rich kid behaviour i tried to copy from watching people in designer stores and movies and stuff like that