You open your bedroom to this standing in your corner

You open your bedroom to this standing in your corner.

wat do?

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STICK MY DICK IN ITS MOUTH

ask if she's trynna fucc

nothing

>zombie nip slip

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turn 360 degrees and walk away

wanna fug?

wonder how drunk I got and didn't finish the job, go back in with the hammer, probably have another go at the corpse before its too old. maby save the ears, I just like ears a lot.

See if that dark goo is slippery enough to allow for tit fucking her.

If not, take her to the shower.

Man, to be 13 again

Fuck it.

ask her what kinda sandwich is the thinkin about makin

what happened, you turned into a fat old nigger?

or you one those 20 year old children shit talking slightly younger children lol.

Be grateful that a woman of some kind just likes me for what/who I am.... Even if all I am to her is food. Might chain her down and seronade her with a sad song while she tries to rip free and eat me. She may come to her senses or she'll just remain a stupid blood-thirsty thot.

protective circle? because fuuuuck her

>what happened, you turned into a fat old nigger?
yeah, yesterday I was a 13y/o white kid living in rural Maryland.. then I woke up today and suddenly I'm a 53y/o black guy living in Harlem.

shit happens.

>20 year old children
lolwut

what did it offend you? wait another 10 years, you'll see a bunch of dumb young kids.

Nope out of there, call my family on neighbor's phone if they're still in the house

However, if I somehow find out she's dangerous before that happens, i low-key might go on a date just because

Fuck off, that was funny

>be me
>waiting for ten years
>the years are passing by
>this shit takes time
>ten years, man.. ten fucking years
>finally, ten years has come and gone
>a bunch of dumb young kids walks by
>I've been waiting for ten years to see this
>I finally see a bunch of dumb young kids
>I'm not sure it was worth it
>the end

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What an emo little faggot you are, hows high school?

Lol

lend her my tooth brush. looks like she could need some.

I side step as she lunges for me and give her a swift kick to her kneepits causing her to collapse to her knees. The light glistens from the sheen of my fedora as I look down to unsheathe my kitana and stroke my neckbeard. In the blink of an eye and in one fatal swoop I slash with my kitana, only missing her and slashing my waifu across the throat. Chicken tendies are all over the place now and the vampire thing looks over her shoulder at me with a confused expression. I pick up a tendie, dip it into the blood on her chest, take a big bite and say "The gender paygap doesn't apply to you." She rages. She rages so hard that she combusts into a void known as the offended. It starts sucking in every person who has ever been offended like a black hole. It grows and transcends itself into a state the human mind cannot imagine. It is the embodiment of offended. It gets offended by its very existence. It begins transcending once again in a never ending cycle of being offended. I look over my shoulder and look you in the eye and say...

"Traps are semi bisexual"

mfw

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Pee all over her face and then cum in her mouth

text my gf: brb, bout to get laid

TTRRIIGGGEERREEDD