Be me

>dont be a pussy
but i am a pussy. i'm hoping for something like a dildo shaped comb.

im 25 and live with my parents still. been working full time at a healthcare company and am about to buy a house in cash.

so excited to have my own place where i can fuck my ass for days at a time.

sorry needed to brag. I hide 3 dildos, 3 anal plugs, 1 set of anal beads, a black wig, about 15 panties, 3 thong bathing suits, a miniskirt, a lose top, a sexy dress an enema, and fake breasts in the box spring of my bed.

the under side is clothe and has a little hole in it where you can stick things. has worked for 8 years so far lol.

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i'm so jealous. i know when i move out one of the first things i want to do after training my ass is just get fucked hard by a big black guy hopefully.

>what inconspicuous object can i buy to fuck my butthole?

This, she will think you're just into fitness.
They're basically dildos with protein drink inside, them, so you can use and toss. You can also google "protein shot" and some other companies make dildos with protein sports liquid inside them too.

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hide inside the pc

>Scout shoves a dildo up Heavy's ass ca 2010 colorized

You obviously have a keyboard and a mouse, may I suggest you use both..........

Cucumbers

>Cucumbers
those go bad, user.

I used to use an exfoliating brush.
Get a small one first (one in pic is fucking huge)
You can put a thick sock or 2 over it and then a condom to make it bigger.

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yup. im going to take wednesday to just clean shave and eat lots of fiber then take thursday and friday off of work.

roll some molly wednesday, paint my nails, put on my boobs and slutty dresses and then just ride until the morning

these sort of things usually have rough edges where the plastic is molded

I feel like you could just use some sandpaper and sand the edges down

FFS, Google hair brush dildos. If you can't figure it out after that you're to retarded to live

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get a cucumber! or a nice fat sausage and put it in the microwave for 30 seconds.

but they all have that stupid hole at the bottom, and weird designs. i just want a brush with a smooth cock shape.

Didn't follow instructions, removed all doubt that they are retarded.

"Yuppers, they only make one kind of hairbrush in the whole world and no such thing as a dildo hidden as a hairbrush"

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it's 2019. just spoonfeed me you fucking virgin.

Get fucked by a cheese grater, entitled prick.

Hide it in your butthole you fucking idiot that’s the point

I'd rather you kill yourself, you stupid faggot, but you'd probably need someone to walk you through that too.

Just get a cactus

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