ITT We work in an office

ITT We work in an office

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there's a plane outside your window OP

hey user, did you get that thing I sent ya?

Yeah that's thew new muslim guy that got hired yesterday

Why is it so fucking hot in here, has someone been messing about with the thermostat?

I was going to ask you to resend it. But I refreshed the page, and realized there was no internet. I went to IT. Theyll fix it in no time! By golly, you don't have the time do you?

Pass me a paperclip for fuck's sake!

Just take off all your clothes.

It was probably Todd. That fuckin prick.

MEMO:

Jim, please stop pissing in the water cooler bottles.

Thanks,
Development

I think something's burning in the break room

Fuck you development

-Jim

How do I print to the second floor printer? It's not in my printer list.
.
.
.
Can anybody print on the second floor printer?

Anyone seen that poster on sexual harassment in the workplace?

I keep pushing in todds bottom drawer and he hasn't noticed.

Nah i was too busy slapping Karen's ass

There is no second floor printer Dave, that’s a coffee machine

Real email I got "Will whoever has been urinating in the garbage can in the woman's room on the 3rd floor please stop."

No, that shit's funny.

Can't find my fucking stapler.

I haven't gotten a raise because I'm black.

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I stapled my fucking finger

Remember tomorrow is no pants day so be sure to bring a comfortable and not too revealing pair of under wear.

Damnit your stapler isn’t safe

Shut up, nigger

uhhhhh, it'ssssssssss, hold onnn, 3:30, just another hour and a half til freedom eh?

You son of a bitch

Nevermind, I found it. Heard screaming while I was looking for it and sure enough Jim was in the bathroom trying to staple his cock shut. Blood everywhere. Might need to call somebody.

HR wants to talk to me about my inappropriate jokes again. Human Rodents man, like the Jews

You didn't take my sliced watermelon by any chance, did you?

It also has my blood as well

Maybe this nigger fucking stole it.

I was just shown this yesterday, you have to make sure that you're connected to the internal 2nd floor suite. then you'll see the second floor printers

Don't worry user-kun.

I'm not a feminazi.

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i almost worked here but then i became an engineer haha niggers

Why is Tommy paid $0.14 more than me?

Seniority you retard. Not like they pay us anything here.

/vip/

Those pajeets in IT sure are smelly.

/pol/

/po/

Rollin'

nice chicken legs
reroll for /vip/

Did you get that thing I sent you?

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No-one gets a raise here. You willingly signed away your life at 6.5 days a week, unpaid overtime and no time off at $5/hour when you joined the company.

-Management.

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rawlin

Hey someone left this on my place, can this someone please come and get it?

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Asp

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/n/

At least you got the job in the first place.

Re-roll

JIMMY WHERE ARE THOSE GODAMN STS-303 REPORTS FOR THE SECOND QUARTER OF 2017! GOT MANAGEMENT BREATHING DOWN MY FUCKING NECK WE NEED THOSE REPORTS JIMMY!

Hey, soo yeeaah I need you all to work Saturday. We have a new project involving the design of a new modern binder. Did you guys get the memo by the way? Sooo yeah make your to also attend the meeting today regarding the problem of employees urinating in the water cooler. I believe I sent that memo this morning. Sooo yeeeeah remember to wear your crazy socks monday, because it's going to be crazy sock monday. Also don't have your slacks rolled up that day we are trying to keep a profissional work place. Mmkay? OK buds remember to sign up for work this Saturday. I'll send you guys a memo. Mkay?

Quick, user! i need that dubs that you've been working all day for now. I need to use in and move to /hr/

Probably affirmative action hire.

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Niggers. You only got the job because you're black.

>shits in copy machine

/mlp/

*reheats fish and kimchi in break room microwave*

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The bomb has been tossed to /mlp/

Damn I just downloaded this pic...hivemind bro

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Oh fuck no!

Dickhead, I'm allergic to fish! Now I can't heat food in that microwave.

It would be nice if you'd stop office space posting, can you get a hold of fucking Jimmy?

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The bomb is here!

you piece of shit, fucking brandon you should have been fired ong ago

hey man some people around the office have been talking about this, they think you're pro-skub. I'm not going to talk to /hr/ but you should just be more careful about this kind of thing, we all have to work here you know?

I hope your sphincter splits and fissures when you shit the remains of this putrid meal out! I never liked you, cunt! I hope someone jalapeno shits on your desk.

Who the fuck stole my lunch from the fridge in the staff room?

Shut the fuck up Tyrone you fucking nigger

YOUR lunch? What about MY lunch!

the nigger, who else

oh shit. time to burn this motherfucker down.

you can smell them coming even before you hear their stupid accents

Can you stop fucking my wife?Its pretty obvious or Ill tell on you that you are fuckung the boss wife.

reported

I wasn't promoted but it must be because my misogynist boss hates me because I identify myself as a 16 year old female.

Also, fuck trump

someone drew a penis on it, so they took it down

>jerks off in supply closet

Who shit on my desk again??

nothing of value in there anyway. someone took all the staples, and the cheapass pens don't write for shit.

It's ok, it's not like I had plans or anything to do, im just lonely like any woman that would work here.

Smelly, but cheap. That's why we can afford to pay you 100K for a sales job, so shut the fuck up, Skip.

calls in sick

>puts MAGA hat on

Has anyone seen the laminator?

It's under Sandeep's desk

hope my boss doesn't walk by

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Where he fuck are your pants, son?

Again?

Why the fuck can’t anyone in this place put things away properly?