i know you guys probably don’t give a shit about some random user and his problems but i need somewhere to vent. continue reading if you want to hear about some guy who feels hopeless and sorry for himself
in the last 2 months, my world has been turned upside down.
>be me, married to my best friend, my beautiful wife >we’re moving states and i’ve got a final interview with an amazing company that’ll pay great and incredible benefits >we’re moving to an awesome city and i’m more excited for my future than i’ve ever been excited for anything >take moving truck, all of our belongings, and cats, drive to parents place in between old state and new state to stay for a few weeks >wife has some business to finish up, and will join me for the last leg of our move in a few weeks >get to parent’s place and wife informs me that she no longer loves me, she’s leaving me and moving back to her mom’s >leaves me stranded with no car >spent a majority of my small savings on moving expenses and motels >start looking for jobs because fuck i need money >parents are gracious and sympathetic, they’re letting me stay while i figure my shit out >after a month straight of 4-5 hours of applications every day, finally someone calls me back >i have two interviews, and i absolutely kill both of them, finally happy about something
>first company later rescinds their offer, notifying me they decided to go with an internal candidate >ok whatever, take the second offer, it’s an hour commute, but mom works nights at the hospital and said i can use her car during the day until i save up a couple paychecks to make down payment on a car >awesome thanks mom, you’re the best >supposed to start work yesterday, finally things are getting better >”oops, sorry user, actually i won’t be home until way later, you can’t use the car today” >fuck, i have to call my new employers and let them know i can’t make it in that day >they’re annoyed but say fuck it, fine start tomorrow >thank god, a second chance >”oops, user, sorry i had to pick up another shift, guess you can’t use the car again”
so that brings us to tonight. i’m supposed to start tomorrow morning, but i have no way to get there. i spent the last of my money on food for my cats and an outfit for the interviews.
i looked my family in the eye and told them i got married. they congratulated me. i had to go back on my word and tell them my wife left me.
i looked my family in the eye and told them i finally got hired. they congratulated me. i have to go back on my word and tell them it’s not going to work
i don’t know what to do guys. i know feeling sorry for myself is the most unproductive thing i can be doing but to be honest, i feel like everything is falling apart and i can’t catch a break. i’m heartbroken, clinically depressed with PTSD after military service, jobless, and officially broke. but i have a roof over my head, and a family that cares about me. i do have that to be thankful for
Hunter Jenkins
take a motherfucking uber
Brayden Smith
Can your family not pay for an uber for the first week or so at least so you can get some form of pay? Even if you barely earn anything, use your moms car whenever possible, use an uber on the other days.
Life has shitty stages believe me, but you get through them. Not by sitting and crying though, that does nothing. Walk if you have to.
Chase Garcia
id love to take an uber if it were sustainable. like i said, it’s an hour commute each way, every day. i looked up the prices, and that’s $70-80 per ride.
trust me, im not sitting around crying and doing nothing. i’ve busted my ass for the last 5 weeks on these interviews and job hunting
but it’s hard when life just keeps kicking you and the beatings won’t stop
i just want things to get better
that’s all i want
Michael Perry
Youre not paying rent, so get any job you can. Work at a restaurant, save up a few paychecks, get some wheels and then get a better job. Who gives a fuck about youre ex, bro. Women come and go. It's fucked and evil but thats how it is. Don't give a women your heart.
Julian Bailey
Use that Uber. Like other anons said.
Borrow the Uber money until you get paid. Make it through the rough.
Sometimes there is no shame in asking for help. But you need to evolve. Become self reliant. For the very short term seems
If you manage to get to work tomorrow or not. Use that facebook short term and ask people for some cash. Can be like 400 bucks just to get you by. Someone in my network did that. by the time I went to donate it was already met. Just be clear that it’s just to fill in the gap in lack until you lock a job down.
At moments of panick take a deep breath and gather your thoughts only do what you can control at this moment. Everything else is bullshit ignore it. And only do what counts more. Focus on incremental success.
Finally get your shit together man.
Ayden Mitchell
If an uber is impossible then just accept that right now that job is unreachable. Literally take any job you can find, even if its the lowest of the low and save up for a car that doesnt fall apart within 3 days. Then you can still work your way up. Previous poster is right about not giving women your heart, it'll fuck you in the long run.
Josiah Fisher
i’m trying to suck up my pride and ask for some cash but i feel so ashamed of everything that’s happened and i hate looking like a mooch. i know that’s my pride talking but i’ve known people like that and everyone looks down on them out of pity or disgust. i try to tell myself i don’t care what other people think but i don’t know if i could handle that kind of criticism, or the shame in groveling just to scrape by. it’s all fucked and i’m still trying to make it work
btw thank you everyone for listening, i do appreciate the words and advice
Brody Stewart
federal minimum wage is 7.25 before tax. to save up for a “just ok” $3,000 used car it will take me almost 3 months of saving working 50 hours a week and spending literally zero dollars
i’m not saying it’s impossible, but starting at square 1 looks like a fucking mountain from where i am, and it sucks. it really really sucks.
Carter Anderson
Where do you live?
Zachary Sanchez
chicago area
Luis Harris
dude just a get a job as a cook in some restaurant if youre in a city you'll probably get like 18 to start and the work is pretty easy. I've been in situations like yours before and thats always been my fall back to work my way back up.
Bentley Lee
i’m further in the suburbs. the closest restaurant is a 45 minute walk and that’s IF they’re hiring which will be min wage because it’s a fast food chain
but i’m keeping my eye out for literally anything at this point
Jonathan Gomez
Shit dude, wish I could help. You definitely need to find a hustle. Check the painted numbers on the driveways in an area close to you. Some people will pay good money to have their address customized.
Nolan Perez
Seriously, m8, tell your mom you need to find a solution because you need the job. That solution is either, A) not pick up extra shifts off-hand (this is difficult in healthcare), B) gib monies for Ubers until you start getting paid, or C) help arrange transport otherwise.
Bentley Young
that’s a decent suggestion. i’ll look into it
i appreciate the thought though. just the support i’m getting here is making me feel a little better
on Yea Forums, of all places. you guys are alright
Levi Anderson
my mom is a wonderful woman and i respect her deeply. with that said, i could not expect of her to pay my way for me, nor could i demand that she make less money to accommodate the needs of my schedule. she’s already doing me a huge favor by letting me and my cats stay rent free, with free food. i can’t ask more from her
Camden Hernandez
might be able to find a work from home job
Hunter Thomas
Well that's the thing. You two come up with a plan to get you "out of the hole and up-and-running," as it were. You keep a tally of Ubers or whatever then pay her back as soon as possible and start helping out with food and such. Once things start to stabilize, then you can work toward your own vehicle. That sort of thing. You need a hand up, not a handout.
>suburbia and nearest restaurant is 45 min walk Damn. Alternatively, any convenience stores, car part places, etc. nearby?
Gabriel Sanchez
this is my next go-to idea. i’ve done remote work before and it was ok
any suggestions? i’ve done IT stuff
Parker Rogers
there is a 7-eleven and a small grocery store nearby. i’ll try those
just sucks i negotiated this job to $30/hr and i’m facing reality that i have to go back to wage slave land. i was hoping for too much
Cooper Hughes
When I have money I buy cheap cars that only need a little work. I drive them until I need money or see an opportunity to make profit. One of the cars I have right now is a 93 BMW that paid 250 for. It only cost me 30 to fix it and I'll probably sell it for 1200. My point is, always look for a way to create an opportunity. There's always a hustle somewhere.
Julian Roberts
who is the cunt that left you literally high and dry
Jaxson Evans
I've never done it before, but I know customer service and data enrety are big ones
Dylan Martin
idk if this story is true or not
but. ive been without a car for like 2years
my parents just bought me one
paid in full
fuck yeah
Levi Ward
>30/hr Even after tax, your first paycheck would EASILY pay your mom back for Uber_loans.
Logan Hall
take out a small loan, lease a shitty car in the morning
Isaac Wood
Nah man, you wern't hoping for too much, you just didnt plan well, thats all. You gotta be patient. That 30/hr job, a car, and a big titted fat assed chick with crazy blow job skills is waiting for you out there in the world but right now youre in grind mode and you gotta set a foundation to build off of to work back up to that.
Ian Wilson
I forgot to mention that I got the 250 by basically doing the same thing with a guitar amp. Bought it at a yard sale for 10 and put a fuse in it.
Juan Parker
my wife? i don’t think she is a cunt. she was considerate enough to make sure i was in a safe place with family before coming clean and telling me she didn’t love me anymore. i’m hurt, and it’s not ideal, but i think she went about it the best way anyone could have. now that i know she was faking to keep up appearances, i’d never want to force her to keep going just so i could be happy. that’s not fair to either of us. she deserves to be happy as well, and apparently i was not that for her.
i wish it could have worked, and i will always wonder what i could have done to make it better, but i wish only the best for her
William Bell
i don’t have the credit for a loan. i’ve never used credit cards or taken out loans so even though my credit score is in the high 600/low700 i don’t have enough established credit for creditors to take a risk loaning money to me. trust me, i’ve looks into this
Matthew Diaz
get up very early and ride a bike you will make money and become very strong at the same time
Luke King
i’m working on being more patient. not to keep tagging on it but i went from >house >wife >job >car >decent little savings nest >planned future
it’s a hard adjustment trying to pick all of the pieces back up, i was just trying to fit one of those pieces back together without realizing it wouldn’t fit
Christopher Moore
>i’ve never used credit cards
okay, since its too late for OP over here let me just give a todbit of advice for any anons that arent too finance savvy
credit cards are not necessarily a bad thing if you know how to spend responsibly. they can be particularly useful for shit like this
how long could anyone keep this up before burning themselves out? for pennies, no less?
Brody Foster
i am learning this now
i was always taught to avoid credit cards like the plague because most people in my family are not good with money and heavily in debt. i’ve only ever spent money i had to spend, but in the process my credit history is a ghost town and i am screwed for these kinds of things
Luis Green
user a 50 mile bike ride should take you about 3 hours if you are a lardass it will take you 5 10hours max commuting + 8hour shift is 18 hours giving you a minimum of 6 hours of sleep this is an actual solution user
Anthony Hall
dude just kill your pride and get a small loan from your parents, 30/h you can pay back a 3grand loan in 2 pay periods
Landon Roberts
biking is about as low impact as it gets so its very sustainable also the ride will get shorter each time as you become stronger and your body adapts yes it will be tough but if op really wants the job this is entirely possible and he will become lance armstrong in the process
Christian Watson
Ok how about start over and start small steps apply retail jobs near your house, if u live in the middle of some shit hole then wall and take a bus. Baby steps and save your money, and reevaluate your priorities. What u needs and wants. Your broke ass can’t supports your ass why the fuck u got a pet, get ride of your expensive phone plan and get prepaid 30$ from Walmart 3gig. Save your money, then get a bike, once settle then get a car then depend if ur parents let u stay longer then go use your degree and look for that job if not then keep working shitty job to save for a place to stay. And how old are u, because u sounds too young and dumb enough to joint military & broke and married. That’s two dumb ass mistake.
These things happen. Disaster are part of life. It's up to you to pick up the pieces. I've been there before, and I've seen freinds in much worse places and work it out. It's not hopless op, i promise this time next year things will be completly differnt
Zachary Ortiz
can confirm. when i lost my car i biked ever where for like six months
Lincoln Cook
>60 miles away >10mph/avg bike speed >6 hrs one way >10 hr shift >6 hrs back >2 hrs to sleep/eat/shower/fucking breathe
yeah man. legit
Xavier Rodriguez
damn man, sending my prayers out to you
Henry Peterson
your parents must have a friend whos car isnt directly needed that day, maybe ask around. ask your family if theres anyone they can think of that have a car you could possibly use
Lincoln Morales
i have these pets because i made a commitment to care for them and it would be fucking evil of me to ruin that trust and get rid of them. i care very deeply for my cats. it’s not their fault all of this happened
Brayden Harris
no its 15mph avg speed on a bike so 4 hours if you want the job just suck it up and become a cycling god
Jose Nguyen
i’ve done that as well. the only person who has a spare car is my uncle and i’ve been trying to get a hold of him all day but he is literally in the hospital with his wife who is in labor. i can’t ask of him to separate his attention from that because my needy ass needs to borrow his car
Joseph Ortiz
ok i’m ignoring you now
Joseph Gomez
thank you, i appreciate it
Nolan King
user you should get some sleep to prepare for your big ride tomorrow heres some inspiration for you
im really sorry. life really isnt pulling any of the punches for you right now. youre gonna make it through even if its by the skin of your teeth
also not needy your life just got completely turned all the way round. its completely reasonable
Ryan Collins
Be realistic here, now your mom have to feed two mouths and one shit in the house. Unless she doesn’t mind. Send it to a shelter. You’re in survival mode here your concern should be saving every penny and being less burden to other and shouldn’t have a luxury to have a pet.
Aiden Sanchez
OP can you not do public transport?
Kevin Myers
most of you guys are actually being pretty helpful but this is just nice. i needed that, thank you
like i said earlier, i’m not giving up, and im not sitting around moping, i just need somewhere to vent
you, tho, you’re a nice person.
Justin Lee
i’ve looked up public transportation for my area and there is one bus that has a stop about 5 miles north of me, and i could take that to a transfer, take that to a train station, take that to the north side of the city, then maybe there will be another bus that brings me closer to this job?? but that’s an insane amount of coordination and probably a 3 hour commute at least
Juan Cook
thank you! everybody needs a little encouragement. i also tend to make friends/meet people on here only after theyve had a life changing cataclysmic event which is odd. met one dude the day after his house was torn to bits by a fallen tree a year ago, just last week he finally got back in his house.
what im trying to say is even though everything just fell apart ive seen people make it through it,and i really think you will. in the future things will have improved even if they improve slowly :) also if you need somebody to seriously talk to lemmie know
David Murphy
>as if suggesting biking wasnt helpful pros bike 100 miles before breakfast surely you could do 60 with your attitude i would just cut your losses and apply at the nearest walmart
Connor Nelson
Why dont you have any money in the bank?
Gavin Anderson
as i stated, i had a small amount of savings, and most of it went to moving expenses and helping my mom with some groceries and gas here and there over the last 4-5 weeks.
right, i’m sure you would gladly bike 120 miles 5 days a week
Andrew King
im pretty sure he said hes almost used it all, partially trying to move out to where he was going and the remainder has been used trying to get back on his feet.
Brandon Diaz
Military, married , and a degree but not a penny? Something isn’t right
Anthony Hill
BEST FUCKING DISCORD THE WORLD HAS EVER FUCKING SEEN WE GOT FUN WE GOT TRAPS WE GOT EGIRLS WE GOT MOVIE NIGHTS WE GOT FUN FOR THE WHOLE FUCKING FAMILY JOIN NOW!!
i have been out of the military for over a year now. they don’t keep paying you after your contract is up.
Xavier Miller
i wouldnt be happy about it but if i was in your position i would at least try because it is possible also its not like you have anything else to do tomorrow might as well try it
James Perez
maybe if it was 10 or 15 miles, but not 60 each way. that’s insane
James Taylor
i suggested the most realistic solution here and your acting like im just a troll It is possible to do this i promise biking is the lowest impact exercise it will not cause any real damage meaning you can absolutely do this 5 days a week if you have the mental fortitude at the same time you will become a cycling god with your new muscles you will at the same time get yourself an even hotter babe thus killing 2 birds with 1 stone
Cooper Richardson
>spending all of the money you got from the military in one year hmmmmm....
Charles Gonzalez
i dont think they get paid a lot
Justin Peterson
depends. usually you dont end up having much to spend it on when youre on duty to so most of it ends up sitting in your bank account till you get out
Luis Smith
Look up the pay charts. Guy probably only served a 3-5 year stint (1st stint minimum depends on branch). It's not much, but if he was married he could've either lived in base housing (if available) or got BAH and lived elsewhere. Provided his area wasn't a shitshow (like most of them are with respect to BAH), he might've had just enough to cover rent and utilities, which is ostensibly how BAH is calculated. Beyond that, living decently on that kind of income, especially if it's single-income, isn't easy. Better than a lot of things, but the point stands.
Jack Perez
man why would he make up all of this for lulz? like, wow so funny i tricked people into believing this sad and unfortnate story about how my life turned around suddenly. just be compassionate, cause if the dude is really going through all this he needs it
Connor Hill
Dude the one and only easiest and best solution is to suck up Ur pride and just fucking ask for a loan from Ur parents, take Uber for the first few times while getting a shiity car that's all. Plain and simple u said Ur parents are understanding and sympathetic, only thing stoppimg you is Ur stupid as shit pride that's making an easy problem into a complicated mess fuck me
Angel Morales
idk, might be true, might be some guy that cant get sympathy irl so he trys to get it here.
Wyatt Phillips
OH SHIT I JUST HAD TWO IDEAS.
If you actually did serve, so you have/had at minimum a S clearance. This opens up several possibilities. Join the local Guard/Reserves (Air, Army, whatever flavor), go work for the local/Fed gubmint in some capacity in the area, shipping companies like drivers who can get on-base more easily, etc. Also, Post Office. Your DD214 is a key that can open some doors, dude.
Luis Wood
I stopped reading the second you made an excuse as to why you can't take an uber/lyft. fake and gay
Easton Taylor
where can I get this awesome action figure made of me???
Christopher Wilson
Also u said u were from military? Why over complicated things? Suck Ur thumb and just do it shit hapoens
Jace Garcia
man if a person is that starved for sympaty why not just give it? if a person is so lacking in that that they needed sympathy fro strangers maybe you should give it regardless of whether or not it can be proven as true.
its like giving a homeless dude money. you dont know what hes going to do with it, he could do something bad or good. he could be telling the truth or lying. whether or not hes tellign the truh says something about his character. but if you have spare means to help, and theres no reason not to it says smething about your own character whether you do or not
TLDR maybe people lie but helping them regardless is good
Juan Butler
insane situations call for insane solutions become the biking boi you were always meant to be and channel your inner merckx
hey man, i’m the OP. i didn’t bring up the military for pity points. just where my depression/PTSD comes from.
to everyone else, thank you for your suggestions and for taking the time to offer me your advice. i truly cannot thank you enough for it
time for me to head to bed. tomorrow has a whole ‘nother list of challenges for me to tackle
goodnight Yea Forumsros
Nolan Harris
if you dont at least attempt the bike ride tomorrow you are a failure and deserve everything that happened
Benjamin Parker
never doubted that you were actual military, just telling other user its better to give whats needed than doubt people somtimes
Jason Hernandez
Your savings must have been pretty small. Or you just fucked it up
David Powell
A 'just ok' car can be got for $500 if you look hard enough. You only need it to last long enough to get you to the job that will get you a better one. Stop being unwilling to settle for what is doable, a $3k car could last you years, you don't need that. You could borrow $500 easy. There are pay day loans that will get you that within hours. They suck but it will get you in the front door of this job, so do it and stop bitching. And don't bitch about how shitty those loans are, we know it, and we don't care; being charged $130 for a $500 30 day loan is better than being a jobless whiner unwilling to do what it takes. Month one you will make more than enough to cover the loan and living expenses if your parents are putting you up free. By month three with frugal living you will be able to get that down payment on a non-banger car.
