Yea Forums i am a well off 35 year old guy that has a family, friends and a great job...

you welcome op have a good rest of life

Maybe giving me all your money will help.

There is no purpose. Who said there was?

see you tomorrow faggot

Were u sexaully abused?

Free spins
vidslotz.com

Yes I was.

Let's turn this into an AMA?

Nobody did, though it'd be nice if there was

Perhaps mate, i guess I could start my life over, do a new game+, you can bang my wife as well, that pussy is so fucking wide it'll feel like fucking a doorway

oh yea that be awesome

Humans are such an incredibly defective species. So tiresome. "Look, look at my problems!"

Topkek

OP approves this as being an AMA, keep the questions rolling, I'll be online the next couple hours

The first to a fulfilling life is first identifying how you choose to interact with others.

Because happiness isn't about other people, or money, or "success". Happiness can be found in every day experience, at every moment. You just aren't paying attention to the present moment; you're distracted.

What beauty or purpose can be found in the present moment? I am distracted i guess, I live from weekend to weekend, on weekends I go fishing or just sleep around, maybe that's a problem, but I can't find anything in my day that brings me some joy (except for some obvious stuff, but that obvious shit doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things)

I didn't say you could purpose or beauty in the present moment. What you can find, however, is contentment and even a baseline happiness. I recommend looking into mindfulness meditation. Just be wary of any woo/bullshit attached to it. Sam Harris's Waking Up is a good place to start.

could find*

I'll look into it, pal

Good luck!

Love you

I started as a refrigerated warehouse worker packing fish until a radio fell off a stand and busted. The next day I brought my soldering iron and new speakers and used part of my lunch break to put it back better than ever. It worked perfectly. Hooked up all the warehouse convicts with KODI firesticks and word started to spread. A contract consultant they hired came out and asked how good I was with computers. I told him flat out that I was the best.
In the span of 4 years I went from helpdesk to sysadmin to the Director of IT. I advanced faster than anyone at that company. Faster than anyone I knew. My budget was limitless and I couldn't stop experimenting, testing, upgrading. Our security cameras are even 360 VR. I could remote in through my vive headset and walk on the virtual warehouse floor to look at labels at midnight if I wanted to. Everyone is on virtual desktops so seamless they don't even know they are. I designed and launched their website. I started to track down phishing emails to their domains and pulling the financials to finalize police reports just out of boredom. I undertook the project of launching a new ERP system with serialized tracking of roughly half a million items created daily. It was done in 6 months, with many sleepless nights at a 24/7 company.
It's almost over. I don't have more ideas. Everything is implemented quickly and every request is done. Just answering emails and trading day to day for a while now. Needless to say I finally looked at average salary and decided it might be time to move on to something that pays more than $45k a year.
Tomorrow, I start job hunting.

45k for IT director? Kek.

My company starts level 1 service desks at 90k. It’s just tempting and troubleshooting “my printer won’t print”

Your story has holes or you live in Estonia or some poor nation

Cause you're not yourself at this point.
Sounds like you ever did what your loved ones, society or even religion wanted instead of keeping faithful to yourself.

What happened?

I really don't wanna get into that

But, my step father had some kinks he needed to sort out, and i was the tool he used...

I'm so sorry to hear that user, have you ever try therapy?

Not really, I had friends, shoulders to cry on, i was a little kid, then we got away from that asshole, excuse of a human being. Didn't leave many traces on my mind, though i still flinch every time someone says something loudly.

Then you should try it, no wonder you feel like this.
It's not like you're gonna lose anything for trying anyways, and yet you could get rid of a lot of traumas. Just have in mind it won't be easy, but it's possible.

I second this user, even if you don't want to talk about the trauma with the therapist (although I think that'd definitely help him help you as that's one of the biggest causes of depression), a therapists job is to give you tools to work through the shit you're going through to be able to feel normal again.

Do what the other anons said and try therapy
>Didn't leave many traces on my mind
There's no way you could know that reliably and it's extremely unlikely you got abused as a kid and it didnt leave a mark of some kind

Okay you butterfucks, i posted this thing as a way to spend a bit of time, didn't expect to find actual human beings here, thank you guys so much... I swear I'll try all the shit you guys suggested no matter what flak I might get from my wife (I doubt she'd like me going to therapy)... You made me smile guys, thanks for that, didn't expect this sorta stuff to happen this evening, thanks for breaking the monotony of my life... "I'm so proud of this community"

I think i feel you OP, normie life is taking its toll, but you know, we all go through these feelings, normie or not.

My advice is, listen to music, buy good headphone or speakers, make music for gods sake, it might be fun, if you are not into that, start gaming, buy a nintendo wii, play mario kart, its fun and you can even play with your kids. Godspeed, OP

I listen to music all the time, like right now. I play vidya by myself and with my kids, but for some reason it doesn't help, it doesn't make me happy, I put on a smile for my 2 boys but it doesn't do much for myself. Anyway, I'll try and find a therapist near me, maybe I'll get a prescription of what to do to feel alive again. Thank you guys so much you have no idea...

>I doubt she'd like me going to therapy
She doesn't have to like it, it's YOUR life, not hers.
Have some love and respect for yourself too, user. Even if you don't think you deserve it, you do. Man up and go to therapy.

I'll confront here beforehand, if she supports me it'll be even better, welp, gotta wait for the morning to see her, it's getting quite late.

Good luck user.

Before i depart, here's a song that kept me from killing myself, haha...
youtu.be/XtZK6C7C_38

Yall might like it

Cheers yall!

You feel no purpose because life itself has no purpose. Every living man, woman, and child is northing more than a high-functioning clump of chemicals and electricity. Death is merely the collapse of a delicate electrochemical arrangement. There's good news, though. Eternal life is a real thing. Apparently protons don't degrade. Though you won't be cognizant of it, you'll drift through the universe until the end of time like a fart that never completely dissipates.

Attached: fall.webm (426x320, 241K)

Truly inspirational words, sir

hey man it's your money, and your life. Hope you feel better

open your heart to Jesus.

I opened my asshole to him.

Right? I was proud of myself for figuring that out. Seriously tho, there's a procedure for depression called TMS. Google it. It's pretty much a miracle.

Attached: mall guard rail jump.webm (720x720, 1.38M)

I've been following "existencialism" but it really didn't help, never heard of TMS

It's not a philosophy. It's a medical procedure.

Attached: car smack.webm (1280x720, 1.86M)

As i said, i got no idea. Also, these videos you post truly drive home the message, amazing.

I know you have no idea. I told you to google it. Pay attention to my words, mongrel. I'm leaving now, so good luck dealing with your misery.

Attached: china horse.webm (640x368, 994K)

Cheers.

>you're probably depressed, so nothing..even your favourite music or movies can feel like ew

lexapro has helped me and now i realize i will go through the motions, varying lows day after the day, the odd good day and a lot of 'i want to die' moments throughout the day, waiting for the night to come so i can sleep again.

wanna get back on it again/

I heard friends of mine say meds didn't help them, or even made their mental issues worse, not sure about the validity of that anegdotal evidence though.

it's all personal and people react differently. if you are feeling really bad, they can certainly get you through it, and attach a chain to any madness you may be feeling.

they'll even you out mood wise, only issue is you may feel a little emotionless and still. any emotions, or feeling whether dark or days that have a certain theme to them, won't be a thing. those days where you just wanna die, they are GONE. no downhill, no feelings of going crazy.

at least for me, and that's not a bad thing.

suicide

no

Join a church and work on spiritual development.

Who's this guy just talking about jesus and church, I already have Jesus inside of me right now.