Wizard here. Have any of you managed to have sex somehow? How do you do it?

connection? If you seek a connection just get some fugly landwhale, if you wanna fuck seek a hooker. But just like iI said, once you've lost your virginity you'll likely realize that it's not worth the effort if it doesn't come to you naturally

I've fucked thirteen different girls so far.

Sex is gay and kinda sucks tbh. I mean it's fun I guess. After a while it gets boring and lame. Depends on the women tho. When you're actually in love, it's a different sex feeling and has a different meaning. But when it's pointless sex, it's just nothing. Its kinda like going to a shitty job and I mean, I fucked all type of different bitches, skinny, big booty hoes and all. Only once have I felt something and that was with this girl, but she broke my heart and after that, nothing. Once you lose your virginity, it feels like nothing. I fell in love once, had plenty of girlfriends and fuck buddies after but nothing was the same and it all felt like nothing. Empty void that will never be satisfied and I never want to see my first love again but I have a longing feeling for her. Rip life sucks

I have no standards. I've tried flirting with fat chicks and it still doesn't work.
Don't girls on tinder get hundreds of matches a week or something? How the hell am I supposed to stand out in that crowd?
How do you get someone to want to have sex? I can talk to people, hang out, but it's all 100% platonic.
I can't even get landwhales interested. Connection really is key though. I don't think I could even enjoy it with a hooker. But the decades without sex are really wearing me down.

Easiest way to get women is to trade drugs for sex at parties.

Protip: don't spend too much on a hooker, you'll regret even 50$ wasted on that shit, realizing afterwards you could've just jacked off.

1) Find a person that is horny and/or desperate for sex.
2) Offer to fuck them.
3) If they accept, fuck 'em.

The main problem a lot of guys have (and which PUA cargo cult shysters reinforce) is assuming that women ain't tryna fuck and that they must be convinced or tricked into bed.

Nah, man. Girls want dick in their pussies just as badly as guys want pussy on their dicks. Maybe not as often, but a girl on the prowl in thrall to her hormones will literally rawdawg a stranger in a stairwell and all he has to do is not give her a reason to say no.

Btw, don't try. It will come when it does. Be loose, be cool, be confident and relax. Sex aint shit. You think it's cool because all these other faggots flex and talk cool and think it's how to be a man but fuck it. Shit don't matter, invest your time in other things.

I wear a giant dildo hat. They love that shit at women's rallies.

How? I need details. What did you do to make them want to have sex with you?
It may not feel like much if you're getting it constantly. Drinking water doesn't really feel that amazing. But going without any fucking sucks.
So, prostitution?
Money really isn't the issue. If I thought it would actually help, I could spend thousands on a top notch hooker. I haven't done that because I don't think I'd enjoy it.

yes. let a succubus into my life. kinda want the card back but also not because the spell has been lifted and its not as big of a deal anymore and i can get another girl in the future no problem cause most of the spaghetti went dry.

dumb advice

you'll be alone forever if you expect women to make the first move

firstly just eat better, work out, improve your apartment/clothes/car/shave/job

volunteer, hike, join community groups etc. that's how you meet people.

also don't be an aggravating neckbeard

don't use tinder/pof/etc

How do you know if they're horny or desperate for sex? Women don't normally make that obvious, at least to me. I can't really imagine just walking up to women blind and asking if they want to fuck.
>don't try, it will come when it does
Yep, this is the world's biggest steaming pile of bullshit. This advice right here is exactly why I'm a virgin at 33. I listened to people like you in my late teens. I listened to people like you in my early 20s. I listened to people like you in my late 20s. By 30, I realized that this advice is complete crap.

bruh

it is never, EVER too late to turn shit around and start making baby steps forward.
reality is that changing yourself is hard and involves embarassing and exposing yourself, its a gauntlet of shedding the shitty parts of yourself very painfully and usually publicly in front of others. So yeah, realistically it doesnt usually happen because most people are going to prioritize their ego and comfort level.
On top of which, a lot of people pursue the "wrong" way to embarass themselves and move forwards. You don't practice shit alone, that just embeds your errors because there's noone there to expose them and force you to adapt. likewise, any sort of "wingman" is at laest a little helpful in that maybe they can expose and discuss ways you fell down and didnt notice.

But yeah, you probably won't change. You'll stay yourself, which isnt working right now for you, under the guise of the concept that "the right one will come to me as i am" which, hahahaha nigger no.
But the other side of this argument is one that gets made far rarer, that you CAN evolve beyond it. Make friends who make you uncomfortable because they're above you, study them, grow from them, look at where you're going and what you want and what would make you that person - the trick is to hone yourself to a level of "confidence" enough to be comfortable around women in a way THEY enjoy as well. You can easily do that in 3-5 years and even have girls laughing that they wanna be the first to pop your cherry, but it just involves... growing as a human user.

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No, once you have sex you realize it's dumb. I guess it's being wise maybe? Sex is a drug, once you do it it's either you like it or not. For me, not so much. I didn't care for it. All I'm saying is, don't just fuck some random.

>Have any of you managed to have sex somehow?
yes
>How do you do it?
with benis

Sitting in your room and beating off won't get you anything. Going out and being cool and waiting will. Understand your target, understand their psychology, understand them before you do anything.

>The main problem a lot of guys have (and which PUA cargo cult shysters reinforce) is assuming that women ain't tryna fuck
you know absolutely zero about pua

Do you know what's a good analogy for someone like you question mark you ever seen those advertisements for those awesome vacations? And then you actually go on vacation and it's really nothing nowhere near what the picture actually looks like? Well that's basically sex for you you're looking at all these advertisements, pornography oh, and assuming that there's something really really great about getting sex. And it makes it so much worse that you never actually get it because now you are totally immersed in the advertisement and never actually have any connection to the product itself. Men who actually get sex know it's nothing like the advertisement. So the answer is stop getting immersed in the advertisement! Go and have sex with some fat less than perfect girl and you know something they're not actually any worse than the so-called hot girl! All women are virtually the same freaking thing. I suppose hypothetically in my mind I believe having a family might actually be something worth while doing but girlfriends are not that great they're not they don't add much to your life. If you really want to do it then get out there and f****** do it your problem is not that you lack something your problem is that you have no motivation and you have no discipline. This freaking crippled midgets that have managed to get married to perfectly healthy women you're telling me there's something wrong with you? No it's just that you're a Little Mommy's boy f***** who won't do anything and won't f****** get off his ass and is afraid of getting his little ego damaged. It's so f****** pathetic

What did she do that was so terrible?
What does a "move" look like? That's the problem. I've got a nice house, nice car, nice job. Does it get awkward if you join some group and fail with the women there, but they're all still there?

have you ever had sex or are you a virgin? Cause I can tell you that shit's disappointing.

And another protip for you: not even beeing able to get fuckin landwhales interested can pretty much only one thing; you're paralyzed by fear to "risk" something making actual advandces. If that's the case you should get a couple of things prescribed by your shrink:

1. SSRI's
2. Anxiolytic's that you'll get easily prescribed like opipramol for exemple
3. Benzodiazepines

One and two you'll get prescribed for depression and general anxiety disorder. Just tell your shrink you can't stop worrying about everything.Nothing in particular, just everyday stuff. For the benzo's you just need to tell him you've got regular panic attacks. Equipped with these 3 badboys your anxiety and fear will be gone and you won't have a problem anymore convincing a low self-esteem landwhale to fuck you. For better girl you need to become better I fear.

This is pretty good advice.

Actually putting yourself out there and involving yourself in communities you genuinely find interesting is the best approach. That's how I lost my virginity. We both shared similar interests so conversations were always interesting, find a point in the conversation to invite her over to your place which generally means let's have sex indirectly. Confidence is also key, so work out and feel good about yourself. Good luck dude

If you've got all these things try finding a website for foreign women looking to marry an US citizen to get their greencard. They'll probably stay with you if you can afford them a good life.

That is a top notch image you've got there. Quality stuff.
I want to be able to grow. I try. I've been going out on group hikes and going to community events. I talk to people, and we joke around and have a good time. Then they go home to fuck Chad and I go home to masturbate. I don't know how to progress from pleasant conversation to getting someone interested in sex.
Difference is, we don't have millions of years of evolution telling us that we just have to try any particular drug. That's exactly what we have telling us that we need to have sex.

Sex is the best part of life. It's why we're here and it feels that right. It may not start that way. Be generous. Take care of the woman. Make the experience good for her. If you make it all about her, it will be good for you to. It helps if you actually like women. Most men here seem to like using women, humiliating women, sharing private photos of them, and otherwise showing their hatred or contempt for women. Love women, and they will love you back.

Honestly I have no idea.

>it's easy, you just have to understand women
Dude, if I pulled that off, I'd become the most attractive man in the history of humanity. That sounds like a tall order.
I would love to find a nice fat less than perfect girl who's interested in having sex with me. I have no idea how to do that. Again, I talk to people and have a good time, but I can't progress further than that. I just don't have any clue what the next steps are.

Not prostitution. The girls are their to fuck, they just need something to loosen their inhibitions. This is why your a virgin.

You know what helped me? I became crossaddicted to jacking off on speed. Now I'm literally only horny when im high. I wouldn't even fuck a girl for free, i just couldn't care less. Jacking off on speed is btw way better than sex could possibly ever be. While having sex your dopamine levels rise to 200%. With amphetamines they rise up to 500%, with methamphetamines up 1500%. Now imagine jacking off while you release 15 times as much dopamine as normal. You can't even compare it to sex.

TY i wish i had another image to match its quality to go along.

The problem is a little higher tier than "the step between talking and sex" and its why youre going to get so many varied and "bland" or vague answers here. Why anyone fucks anyone is because it seems fun.
I genuinely bare you no ill will when i say, you're probably not very fun. Not very exciting, adventurous, attractive, or promising.

Some people will tell you to focus on the promising part - hone up your job, be an attractive long term mate. Go look at most engineers to see why this is no guarantee.
Some will tell you to focus on the physical part - be attractive and attract a mate. Go look at /fit/ if you want an example of why this is no guarantee.

Dunno if you ever shot somebody, but when you shoot at someone if you're not just shooting at an area for effect, you shoot to kill. You don't hesitate or pontificate or think and consider and feel emotion, you act as fast and precise as you can or else you miss your moment. I'm not gonna say sex is like killing someone, but... i would say your problem is probably two things:

1) Inability to hit the moment. Dancing around, waiting to see what the other person thinks, failing to put yourself out there, really just dancing around the issue and not knowing what you're really going for. In this, i recommend using WHATEVER method helps you feel focused - online dating, you can just TELL people you want to fuck, and feel like you're in the open about it. Go to a cougar bar and chat people up, dont buy em drinks though, make it clear you're there to go home with someone. Be CLEAR, don't waiver in your goal, be honest WITHOUT being pressuring
2) Confidence or comfort in YOURSELF. Sex has the uncanny ability to make you feel like you deserved it, and when you dont get it, it slowly becomes fucking mythical. You need to find WHATEVER it is that makes you feel confident and comfortable in yourself regardless of if you get laid (no space left)

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I'm a virgin. That's why I'm asking here.
I don't get panic attacks though. At least not regularly. Have a few times in the past, but not enough to get drugged up over. Do you really think a drugged version of me would have a better shot? Alcohol certainly doesn't help. Do shrinks really have better drugs?
When and how do you escalate? Are you just nice and friendly beforehand, and then once she's at your place start the touching? Or do you do that beforehand? How do you make it obvious she's not just there to play Yahtzee?
Won't they just divorce me and take all my money as soon as they've got their citizenship though?

Im 21 and my problem is just conversing with people in general. I already beat social anxiety but I still can’t make conversation for shit. I can add comments and small bits of information, ask questions and shit but I can’t bring myself to bring any original idea to the conversation like a good joke or a good observation or provide knowledge about anything to keep the conversation flowing. I sometimes catch myself almost interrogating people like a dickhead cause I run of things to say. I don’t have any stories to tell either and not much goes on in my life to talk about. I’ve started going to the gym and got a job but I still don’t have friends or any way to meet women. I’m motivated to this shit but I still feel so behind.

Fuckin its like 11pm so i lost where I was going with this but, i dunno, god, i hope you see where i'm coming from here: Everyone's advice is gonna feel targeted because its what they think works for them.
In reality, what works for anyone is when you start from minute one of an interaction with a girl in the approach of "Hey i am very interested in you. You can take it or leave it, i'll move on fine, but i want you"
Being able to move on and, fucking ironically enough NOT looking at women as something only for sex, is what gives you the comfortable approachable nature of "wow he doesnt really give a fuck about me, thats exciting" that women want.
Bud i'm ugly as fuck. 5'9" manlet with a beer gut and i still have chased some 7s and 8s, well beyond me if im being honest, 10-15 years younger than me (cue monster swilling boomer pics), and its largely been in approach and comfort level. And dont mistake comfort for "friendship". Letting a woman walk all over you isnt "creating a comfortable environment". Having comfortable easy low pressure conversation is comfort. Being suggestive while reading and responding to how she reacts to that is comfort.

More than anything, never put your eggs in one basket - talk to a lot of women, identify when they view you as free therapy and disengage gently but honestly. If someone doesnt give you what you want... people only exist for you to get what you want from them anyways, so why get worked up, move on to one that works better.
But its a fucking JOB mate. If you wanna get laid, better put in the footwork, get out there and get a lot of exposure like looking for a job.

I dunno i'm tired and rambling and about to turn off the computer and never see this thread again but, i hope you take a look at the broader picture from this and dont take people's shitty "hit the gym" myopic shit as the solution.

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I'm actually decent at fucking girls, and this is the most retarded shit I've read in a while. I've experimented with messaging dozens of girls various forms of solicitations for sex, and got maybe 1 extremely insecure psycho. That vs taking your time and not being a thirsty beta, where I can 80% of the time fuck any girl who agrees to go out for a nature walk then drinks. Leave your house more

The meds from the shrink won't make you retarded like alcohol does, they will just take your anxiety away. Although I get the sense that you're trolling, I mean: "I don't gwet panic attacks though." Are you fucking kidding me? You're not only unable to attract a girl but you're also incabable of lying?

Regarding the mailbrides; you can get a marriage contract you fuckin moron. Ideally they want to stay with you if you really are well off.

>Extremely valuable, coherent, empathetic and intelligent post on Yea Forums

Nearly gasped from shock

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yes, you're putting too much pressure on it. go on tinder and just fucking get some depressed chick that wants some dick. be cheesy, or straight forward.

I just need someone to let me love them. I mainly want the connection that only comes with sex where she's enjoying it too.
I've had my share of drugs bro. I know they can be amazing. But it's all fake. Artificial happiness. The mind eventually realizes how fake it is.
I never know what the right moment is. Continuing with the shooting analogy, I'd be the guy who waves his gun around like a fucking idiot trying to impress people and ends up shooting himself in the foot.
I can't even imagine making it clear to someone that I want sex, especially with all the #metoo stuff going on lately. Let the wrong person know that you want to have sex with them and your life is ruined.

shit sorry now i gotta balance the universe.

Suck my dick you faggot nigger.

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I got lucky and have good looking parents. 6 feet tall, no male pattern baldness genes, relatively symmetrical face and solid jawline, on TRT and work out daily. I have been extremely lucky in the pussy i have gotten over the years. Raised in a solid upper middle class family, intelligent, good genes, I was able to develop a confident outgoing personality when I was growing up because i had life so good and I was successful early with girls. I view high school as a crucial development time for men. If you don't become confident and outgoing, and have some experience with women in this time period, I am certain it causes long term near irreversible damage.

So when people say just be yourself, they come from an experience not everyone has. I can honestly say that I can just be myself to women and it works. But only because i am above average in looks, and I have grown a personality that is confident and humorous. The only way I was able to grow was by interactions with girls, so an ugly incel just doesn't even have a chance to start the process. Unless he is rich.
Be really good looking and you can be broke and have a terrible personality. Be just above average like myself and you have to also have personality and some sort of decent career. Be ugly and you better be rich.
Life sucks for most people.

Girls go out for nature walks? How the hell do I meet girls to go on nature walks? The thought of asking a woman to hey, let’s go walk around a trail seems so alien to me.

Why do you care about sex then? It's just another drug and an extremely expensive and weak one. The only difference between sex and drugs is that your craving for sex is natural. Look at sex addicts for confirmation.

>feel so behind
>21
Hey, at least you're not 33. Hurry up and change something before you wake up and realize you're me.
Hey, thanks for the advice. There's some good stuff in there. Good night bro.

I’m literally 5’2”, balding bad at 23, $100 to my name, never had any female friends, never went out in high school and never dared talked to a girl. Still anxious as fuck so I’m pretty sure I’m one of the few destined for wizardhood.

Be decently attractive and eventually a woman will want to fuck you. It's only worth it if you fuck once or twice, or fuck once in a while. Do not let them trap you in a relationship, do not validate their stupid egos, and most importantly either be confident or don't do it at all. I kind of wish I never fucked instead of fucking and being awkward, don't fuck up like I did. Either commit to the Chad life or don't even bother.

If I was good enough at lying that I could convince a shrink to give me meds for a condition I don't have, couldn't I just use that same lying skill to convince women I'm worth having sex with?
Don't depressed chicks on tinder that want dick have a line of men chasing after them already? How do you stand out?

#metoo is a jewish conspiracy to make men act more faggy.
I cant... prove a single word of that but, im on Yea Forums so i must be right.

Being able to "read" someone's subtext and implication is a universally complex thing, its one of probably the oldest sources of contention in humanity.
I think, perhaps somewhere in the midground, might be facing this with help. I have NO idea what your situation is, but i would avoid facebook or anything too embarassing and basically do the following:

Own up to your problem on an "area" forum on PoF, as an example but im old and out of touch so take this with a grain of salt. If you have friends that are girls that are genuine friends (you dont) you would just ask them, but in general find a few women who you can be ZERO sexual to, and be completely honest - I dont know how to talk to a woman, i am a 30 year old virgin, i want to get better at just interacting with people and would love some friends to help me.

Women LOVE that stupid shit, they'll treat you like a little gay best friend, try and set you up and give you advice. Their advice will probably be dogshit, exact same as asking here. What really matters is
A) They'll make you feel comfortable and relaxed talking to women
B) They can help you understand, from an outside perspective, the fine line between creepy and "playing right into their hands"
C) They can just get you a lot of exposure, set you up on a lot of dates, might get you a pity lay from a friend.

I REALLY recommend bringing in outside help, you seem like a smart enough guy to be asking this in an unabashed way so, use your brain and think of a way to bring in WOMEN to help you move forward on this. Its all an experience game, like taking interviews with companies you dont want just to stay polished.

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rent a hooker

it's fun

"Talking to girls" is really just learning how to ask questions and not be afraid to flirt/respond in a provocative manner. I also find that calling a woman "love" or "dear" seems to disarm most of them. Must do all this with a smile. Another weird one would be a specific type of eye contact; after your flirts or provocative comments, you must generally stare with a confident smile to assert slight dominance. (Works with men and women actually!) Good luck kid, I'm 40.

>Don't depressed chicks on tinder that want dick have a line of men chasing after them already? How do you stand out?
you don't, it's a numbers game, play them odds.

Don't do it. It's not worth it. It is literally a meaningless thing...
Then again everything we do here is meaningless

If that feeling of lonelieness and that craving for love becomes unbearable, I have another advice for you. Using Cocaine + Alcohol for extended periods of time will make you more brutal. After some time you'll care way less about other people and things like love.

Odds game absolutely! The more you practice flirting/chatting with as many women as possible - were talking mostly in person if you can (fat, way older, it doesn't matter just practice!)

I'm 28. Had moderate success early on in sex. But at my age none. I think it's the evolution of the way Femanon are targeted by media. Now it's cool to be a feminist so dudes cant get fucked. In 08 it was fuck city.

1. How and what type of questions should you ask?
2. How do I “flirt”? I’m not spontaneous or thoughtful enough to come up with anything. My jokes feel lame and forced. And they feel like jokes and not flirts. I just feel like I don’t have any charm. I don’t have any anxiety anymore but I still can’t mentally be a someone like that

34 year old virgin here. In my experience, losing your virginity to just anyone is quite easy. As long as you throw standards out of the window. The only thing keeping me a virgin is that at this point I want it to be with someone I could see myself with for a long time and don't want to risk knocking someone up and being stuck with someone just cause I wanted to get my dick wet. And yeah, I know there are methods of preventing that but my luck is shit and I don't trust that it wouldn't work out that way.

This guy gets it. High school is a critical formative period. I was busy studying because I was an idiot and followed the bullshit advice that relationships will come when the time is right. The years just kept ticking by, and the career and money that comes from working your ass off in school can't possibly compensate for missing out on that crucial period of sexual development.
Yes, they do. Often. Women love nature. I go hiking with women a fair amount. We have a grand old time enjoying nature, but we never have sex, so take that for what it's worth.

It's literally as easy as saying to him: "I feel really depressed and anxious all the time. I can't stop worrying about everyday problems. I'm really not the talking type and think therapy isn't gonna help me, I'm just here to get medicated."

Thats literally it.

My 30's is when sex started coming from everywhere, men and women. You just become more confident with time. Some guys have it much earlier than us!

Main problem solved. Now your just ugly

Sex in the context of a relationship is one of the most wholesome drugs you can have. Plus there's no hangover.
How attractive is "decently attractive". Things like this make me worry that I'd need to be at least an 8 to be "decently attractive" and that's never going to happen.

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take care of yourself and dont give any semblance of a fuck about any women around you for any reason, and they will all flock like seagulls to a fish on a shore.
im fucking serious

Hey OP professional slut whisperer and absolute degenerate here.

I was hopeless until I turned 21 and decided to get a hooker and get it over with. I'm so glad I did, it was like night and day, sex wasn't such a huge deal if you can just buy it with a few dollars.

I started going out more, talking to girls in clubs and failing miserably until I got a hold of it. Fast forward 10 years and I've probably banged likes 70 women.

Not gonna lie, that number accelerated when I started working out and dressing better. Practice makes perfect and you figure out what works with most girls.

Tinder is also a great help, but a waste of time if you don't look after yourself.

So, get a hooker, start training, dress better, drink some alcohol and go out and make a fool of yourself until you don't anymore, we can't hold your hand on this.

PS you don't need to lower your standards as deep as these fags say, get a proper assessment of your score out of 10 and aim 1 point lower. If your score is below 7, then that means you're a fat piece of shit, so fix that first. Also I've never banged a girl over 29 or fat.

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You need to abandon the conventional idea of going to dinner or the movies. Instead, opt for something a bit more active like grabbing a coffee and walking around a nice park you know of. Chicks fucking LOVE nature shit like hikes.

My routine is mostly precisely that. During the date, make very light non sexual contact such as a tap on the arm when you both laugh. Escalate it as time goes on, like lightly grab her lower back if you're crossing a street. Eventually find a railing to lean on or a bench, and put your arm on her shoulder. You'll know if she's down to kiss, they're pretty obvious about it.

Want a failsafe method? Ask her to close her eyes. If she does, you're about to steal some of her saliva. If she gets nervous and says "hehehe why xD" then don't be too pushy and shake it off then try later. Try to get at least a light kiss session on the first date, girls are high energy as fuck nowadays so you have to leave a mark. Then figure out how free she is. If you're lucky you can go right into the night and have drinks with the momentum you built, high chance for a fuck if it does. If not, go for a second date and try to get seductive at your/her place

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Just ask random questions if there's no subject present. And respond to them with more questions! If there's something you have a chance with a slightly naughty response, lay it out :) "Well, I like it raw" "Of course remember your name, I'm still single!" a few recents. Being forced isn't bad; dad jokes are always a good test of their humility, fun women laugh at lame jokes.

The whole flirting thing with both men and women seems to generally make people attracted to me and friendly with me. Since I'm a pessimist at heart, I have to actively/mentally keep the negative conversation at bay. (that was a huge learning experience!)

I don't really understand your problem. Are you even a man? I've literally never asked for sex. Women have gotten on their knees and begged me for sex. Turning them down is an even bigger ego boost than fucking them. You need to just stop being a faggot and go slay some pussy.

How would you know? I thought you're a virgin? The only reason why you're convinced of that is your sex drive. The only time you can think clearly about how "good" or "woth it" sex actually is is right after cumming, when your judgement isn't clouded by your sex drive. And if you've asked 100 guys directly after cumming how important sex is in all honesty I'd be willing to bet not even 5% would put it in their Top 3 priorities.

HEHE. CLOSE YOUR EYES.

LOOKING GOOD LADIES...

AND WALK AWAY.

lmaoing at your life

My fucking man. So can you say you disbelieve all the blackpill incel theory? (behavior is irrelevant, sex is just girls liking your genetics). I personally learned how valuable confidence and behavior is myself (assuming you're a white guy going for white girls)

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That's a good idea. I don't really have women I'm comfortable enough talking to about this sort of thing. Or men for that matter. None of my conversations (outside of anonymous places like this) ever get beyond the superficial.
I hope I'll be able to find someone like that.
Have you had opportunities to get laid? What were they like?
I can only remember a single opportunity for getting laid in my entire life. A female friend started holding my hand out of the blue and told me she was feeling horny. I had no idea what was happening or how to respond. That was over a decade ago now, and nothing anywhere close has happened again.

Cringe. I've had more makeouts than cum riddled tissues you've thrown in your kindergarten Spongebob edition garbage can in your moms basement

a reasonable response, lol

Thinking out loud here, BUTTERFACES. I've slept with many a sexy body with a meh face. That flirting practice must enter all realms!

Yeah, thats bullshit. Behavior helps a lot. And genetics Id say its a bonus (height and face).
And unless you are misshapen, burned, or missing limbs or retarded, you can ALWAYS reach an 8 by getting a tight body, fine clothes, a cool lifestyle and social proof.

You might not be a 9 or 10 because for those you need a beautiful face too, but you can achieve 8 no matter what hand you were dealt (AS LONG AS THE PREVIOUS STATEMENT IS TRUE)

I'm great at ignoring women. I ignore almost every woman on the planet. Somehow none of them have come to me looking for sex.
I'm average at best, but since when has 7 meant "just slightly above fat piece of shit"? 7 is pretty good looking, borderline hot.
Has your first time with a hooker ever come back to haunt you? Has the topic of first times ever come up, and you have to dodge somehow?

AND WALK AWAY.

I STILL GOT IT.

IM GONNA WRITE THIS MAKE OUT SESSION DOWN TO IMPRESS MY ONLINE FRIENDS

lmao who counts makeout sessions you massive virgin hahahahaha

stahp it, too much lol in bullying lol

For men is different my man, if you're a 6 as a dude, youre close to invisible and means you put no effort into yourself.

As for the hooker, nah, found her online, went to her apt, banged her, and felt like a million bucks for finally not having to use my fucking hand lmao.

When anyone asks when was my first time, I just lie and say "a girl when I was 17". Noone questions any further.

Take care of yourself, your looks and smell should reflect that. back with up with a decent personality.

>Have you had opportunities to get laid? What were they like?

Yeah. A lot of times it's women that I have no real interest in. There was one time where I could have slept with a pretty good looking woman but she had just fucked my cousin and was hitting up on me because he left her dissatisfied. A lot of the times it's not as surefire as that example where I am directly asked but if I put even a mild effort forth I could have got some. There was one time where I was directly cock blocked because my drunk friend ended up calling the cops on himself and the party broke up before I could seal the deal.

Now I'm just as the point where I'm find just waiting til it's someone I'm really interested in and not just for the sake of losing it.

I'd say if you really do just want the experience and want to lose it without worrying too much about who you lose it to, all you have to do is go to enough social functions and be even moderately sociable. It's a numbers game as long as you don't have too high of a standards on who it is you sleep with.

first gf slept over at my house. Wasn't feeling great at the time. Couldn't get it up long enough to give her a good fucking but managed to pop the ol cherry. Still feel like a fag for the underperformance :(

It’s hard to describe, honestly. I think the best way to get it is through being honest with the people that you’re into and getting out there on dating apps like Tinder. Met my gf of about a year now on there. Just keep it up, you can do it!

>ask her to close her eyes
>go in for a stealth kiss
This would be considered borderline sexual assault in today's society...
I'm a master of dad jokes. I've had several people tell me I should get to be an honorary dad because of it.
My problem is that I don't understand how to behave like a sexual being around women. I can't do anything more than friendly conversation.
That's a big part of it, of course. There are some things in life that can't really be justified rationally, and sex is one of them. But just like other animals, I'm driven by desires that I can't control, even if I do have a few higher level mental faculties.

Maybe you smell really bad. Smell is rather important to females

Also know that you need to build a relationship with anybody that you’re gonna have sex with, whether it’s a committed one or not.

I'm not deformed or anything, but my hair is starting to thin, which means the max I could possibly hope for is a 6. Men can only compensate for that sort of thing by having superb movie star level facial features.
Social proof comes with sex. Sex leads to more sex, but nobody wants to have sex with you until you've had some sex.

If you don't understand this then why does it matter to you. Be a wizard if you want.. nobody cares. If all you care to know is how sex feels than go get a hooker. But wouldn't you rather know how it feels to be a man?

Knowing all that I don't get why you're still wasting so much thought on it and are seemingly willing to do quite much to get it. If you consciously accepted how futile, pointless and unfulfilling following your sex drive is, why are you still so keen on doing it? Why don't you just try to surpress your sex drive as good as possible (which is easily achievable through masturbation) to focus your energy and time on more fruitful endeavors (fruitful in terms of fulfillment and turning your life into something more enjoyable)?

This is flawed thinking. Revisit your philosophies which aren't based in experience, but rather your perception of your experiences.

>sexual assault in today's society

Again, you really have to mentally abandon what the feminists told you about conventional sexual behavior. You'll one day have a girl alone with you in bed, and she's 95% gonna playfully take your hands off her when you feel her up and unhook her bra. The difference between a girl playfully resisting to turn herself on and staunchly telling you "NO" is fucking obvious

Just shave your head instead of holding on to your pathetic excuse of a haircut that does nothing but display your bad genes.

>Drunk sluts in bars know your entire sexual history

Where do I meet women? I go to bars alone and have not had any luck, I just say stupid shit when I’m drunk. I don’t know how to make conversation with people when my life is pretty pointless. Really don’t have anything going for me.

Get a decent hooker to get it over with. Hows your body? Can I tell you train when you wear just a shirt?

Did she get upset or anything about the poor performance? Or was she fine with it?
Honest how? Is it all just nonverbal cues and whatnot, or do you actually explicitly tell her with words that you're interested?

Not that it would matter if a girl really wants to fuck your life.

Hello, fellow Wizard.
If you really care about sex, then get an escort.
If it's a female companion a.k.a. girlfriend what you desire, then just stop sitting on your hands and go out, meet people.
I kinda lament not having a significant other, but don't really care anymore.

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Easy mode:

Tinder/Hinge/Bumble.
College.
Traveling (hostels).
Parties.
Friends of a friend.
Clubs.

Hard mode:

Straight up talking to strangers about some dumb topic and exchanging numbers.

so, was Zona up to much after work?

Then do as you're doing and keep getting what you've always gotten. There's people here with experience fucking sluts telling you it really isn't hard. Ditch all your apparent knowledge and theory, and test shit out yourself

I'd advise against "decent". The more you pay the more you'll regret not just jacking off.

Talk to as many women as you can, random women at the grocery store, the checkout clerk, chicks at work, whatever. Bonus points if you have a customer service wagie job.

Once you are comfortable talking to random chicks all day, you can tell if one of them likes you, then you just set up a date and let nature take its course.

PROTIP: be the easy-going chill guy, chicks like that guy. This means being willing to say goodbye even if you are dying to cling to her for dear life, trust me on this, it is the most important thing with girls.

I wasn't even disagreeing with you, in fact I do agree with everything you've said. That basically was just a smartass remark of me stating obvious facts.

Good list except tinder. That shit is terrible and demoralizing for beginners. I doubt OP has perfect photos of him rock climbing taken from buddies which is what 90% of tinder thots swipe to

Decent doesn't mean top tier, decent means average lookin chick, if you dont like her physically its going to be way harder to get it hard, it already is enough nervousness getting laid for the first time.

I chose one with huge tits because damn I love tits. Her face was a 6 probably, body was an 8.5 with big tits.

No ragrets.

I’ve been reading advice like the ones in this thread for years online. I’ve been working out, dressing nicely, have gotten a few tattoos to compliment my look, and have moved out with roommates. I still don’t really have much money saved up, but make sure I have enough to cover my expenses. Though I’m finally independent or whatever which was initially my issue, I still have no idea how to connect with girls. I don’t know why but every time I’ve ever chatted a girl up it’s always feels like she’s trying to make herself out of the conversation. I’m not creepy, but I’m pretty ugly if I’m being honest, so is this why women have an uncomfortable aura when talking to me? Talking and making friends with dudes is easy, but girls always seem on edge like they don’t want me to try anything.

Ahh my bad then. Were all gonna make it

Hahahaha fuck, thats my tinder. I have pics of my skiing and rock climbing and flexing my gains at the beach.

I shower twice a day. I don't know what else I can do. It is summer and miserably hot out though.
I'd much rather have sex with someone who's interested in being with me. Her enjoying it is as important to me as me enjoying it. That's why I haven't gone to a hooker.
>just suppress your sex drive
Catholic priests have tried and failed. It's essentially impossible. I've tried to put sex out of my mind for most of my life, but my sex drive is constantly there, reminding me that I really need to get laid.
>you'll one day have a girl alone with you in bed
I really hope so user. I wish I could share your optimism about it.
I seriously am pretty concerned about fucking something up and getting accused of rape though. We now have "Yes means yes" campaigns going on, which would consider your last example to be sex without explicit consent, which equals rape.

Be sexy.

In response to how do you escalate. Having a couple of drinks makes it easier, mine was a pretty weird transition since it was my first time. I kinda just went for it. Started making out and she started feeling me up and taking off my cloths. I think best approach is so make a sexually suggestive conversation. "Do you want to say over?" "I want to make you mine for the night" etc. All in all, You're just overthinking, I tended to do that a lot. It doesn't really matter what you say, say it with confidence and it works 100% of the time.

I guess you give off a creepy vibe. Maybe don't be so pushy (if you are)?

Also this. You may just smell bad. Don't just brush your teeth but your tongue aswell (the tongue is a lot more important than your teeth to avoid bad breath), shower before you go out and wear a nice cologne.

This, just cast as wide of a net as possible and you'll eventually catch a fish.
I used to use macros on okcupid and pof to swipe/like or whatever on basically every chick within 100 miles. I've been with like 5+ chicks so I can say it works if you're not a total trainwreck of autism/disgusting subhuman goblinoid.
Try imacros on firefox and you can probably figure out how to work it to do the work for you.

Das it mane
>photo crouched next to a dog smiling
>rock climbing with you smugly looking back
>beach photo holding a beer with buddies and maybe a few girls next to you
>a photo of you doing something super silly showing you're not too uptight

How to absolutely drown in thots

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Pretty easy to take advantage of when your high-school age as long as you not a shitty person. But after you actually have to work and be out there. Be lucky with where you work and you'll make decent friends who will put you in circumstances that girls are at. Talk with them for a while and naturally they bang. Providing booze and drugs help

It's not that bad yet. I've still probably got another decade before I might look better bald. I know a guy who was in a similar situation, shaved his head to see how he might look with a shaved head, and it never grew back. Not gonna risk that, at least not yet.
They can tell if you're sexually inexperienced. It radiates from older virgins like an aura.
My body is nothing special.
What level wizard are you? I'd love to find a girlfriend somehow, but maybe if I keep doing what I'm doing for long enough I'll be able to stop caring as well.

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Yes, your sex drive will always be there. What you need to change is your mentality about it if you try to surpress it. If you get horny you probably immediately start thinking about girls, fantasizing about a relationship with a beautiful girl or even a marriage. You must train you brain to respond to your sex drive with the immeadiate thought of "Oh, I need to jack off". Fantasizing about these girls, feeling lonelier than ever doesn't feel great right? Just remind yourself that you need to jack off, do it, and it goes away instantly. Jack off everytime you feel down because of your lonelieness and soon you'll notice that when you get horny, you don't think about girls or relationships anymore. You'll just think: "Oh, I need to jack off".

Have you considered that maybe youve become bored by sex because you havent explored it in different ways? Maybe you always do it more or less the same way, which worked for you in a specific scenario that is no longer true. Theres tons of things you can do in bed, from just exploring your mate's body to using toys and beyond, and if youre getting bored maybe youre just not opening yourself up to explore. Not trying to say this is true but just throwing some different perspective in there to see if it fits.

Why did you wait so long though. How did you cruise past your twenties without getting a single impulse of "hang on i need to go out there and do something myself" in spite of what anyone else might tell you?

Are bumble and hinge any better?
What's the worst responses you've gotten to things like "do you want to stay over"? Do they let you down easy, or does that lead to getting slapped?
Does liking every possible profile work anymore? I thought services started ranking you lower if you did shit like that.
I'm a software engineer so I could probably whip together a script that would like every woman in the country, but I'd probably get banned after the first 10,000 or so.

As long as you aren't that ugly it's not very hard.

people will tell you to "be yourself" but obviously you are not attractive to women otherwise you wouldn't be here asking for advice. be better than yourself. get off Yea Forums first of all. second, make sure you're doing something with your life. most important is to stop caring if you get laid. women can smell desperation a mile away, and it is the biggest turn off. focus on improving yourself and building your best life, and women with similar interests will be drawn to you.

all i did was put it in

Do people still go for the drugs in their 30s? I kinda got tired of the drug scene after a while, but I guess I could pick it up again if it would help me get laid.
That sounds like such a fucking depressing way to live life. I honestly think I'd prefer longing for a relationship that I'll never have.

This grill was liek, "you wanna hae sex?" I said kay.

"What's the worst responses you've gotten to things like "do you want to stay over"?"
That line of thinking is your problem man.
This WILL help you loose your damn anxiety around women, which decrease your /10-level of attractiveness by around 4

shower regularly and hide your power level at all costs. that's it.

So, longing for something you'll never get is better than not longing for it? Makes sense. As much sense as thinking beeing addicted to crack while having any is better than not being addicted to crack while not having any.

I tried to do something a number of times. I would convince myself that this year is the year I'm going to get laid. Worked out, went out to bars, tried awkwardly flirting. My friends even went on a crusade to get me some sex. Of course, these endeavours always failed, and I'd go back to just hoping that "it will happen someday".
I can't just stop caring. Decades without sex have taken their toll on my sanity, and my animal brain is constantly telling me that I need to do it, ideally right fucking now.
But let's say hypothetically I did stop caring. Then I wouldn't care, so what would even be the point? At that point I wouldn't even want sex, so I'd just continue not getting sex and die a virgin anyway.
Did you at least talk to her first? It seems only polite.

>banging girls on tinder is easy as fuck

No it's not

1. Put down the game controller
2. Shower and shave off the neckbeard
3. Leave your mom's basement
4. Go into public where the women are and talk to them

Do I need to shower more than twice a day? That's how much I currently shower.
I have no idea how obvious my power level is, but I've been asked on quite a few occasions if I have kids, so I'd guess that people don't immediately assume I've never had sex.

twice a day? are you obese?

Why do people always assume that older virgins live in their mom's basement? My house has its own basement, thank you very much. I don't even live there either. I live upstairs.

No. I just like showers. They feel nice.

You kind of give off the impression that you feel rather comfortable in the victim role you assumed. You ask for advice but always come up with a reason why that wouldn't work for you. You say "...my animal brain is constantly telling me that I need to do it, ideally right fucking now", yet you don't want to fuck a hooker because "I mainly want the connection that only comes with sex where she's enjoying it too." You need to get over yourself and just start accepting advise and actually try to change something instead of relishing in your victim role.

Go to a hooker to get your mind clear and gain some experience, then just use some of the advise her to meet some girls. You won't get any foolproof plan of how to fuck a girl here, there is no "hack" to make them love you.

Fuck a fat girl off tinder.

They’re easy if you just want a warm wet hole to stick your cock into.

Be sure to give a fake name and number though.

It would be helpfull if you posted a picture of yourself so the situation can be properly assesed.

/thread

Because it’s an easy assumption and requires no thought.
Hence why it’s so prevalent.

Unless you actually are a basement dwelling mommas boy, it should be a source of amusement rather than an insult.

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Simple...

1:Stop worrying about your insecurities.
2: Stop giving a shit what other people think.
3: Be yourself.
4: put yourself out there more.

Work on those 4 things and you'll 100% get laid.

just fucked the lady 20 minutes ago.

Obviously there's a clash between the animal brain and the human brain here. I can hold both beliefs simultaneously, and they fight each other for control. Do you thinking fucking a hooker would help? I'm worried it would just make me feel worse.
How do they contact you if you give a fake number?
see

Because old virgins = losers = probably don't have their life together = increased likelihood of living in their mothers basement

I’ll add 3 things to this;

Eat healthy.
Exercise regularly
Act confident.

There. You’ll be swatting away the women with a shitty stick

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>How do they contact you if you give a fake number?
You get a burner phone , retard.
Do you not have a burner?
Cost like $10

>know a guy who was in a similar situation, shaved his head to see how he might look with a shaved head, and it never grew back

That’s not how hair works you gormless retard.
There’s nothing you can do to the hair strand that will affect the follicle.
Your friend was already that bald.

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Why not just give it a shot, if it doesn't have anything to do with you being afraid? Why have you never given it a shot in over 30 years, if you're not afraid? What do you worry about? Whats the worst that could happen? Any chance you had a very religious upbringing?

And if you're just afraid, this:

Used Yik Yak.

This. Especially the bit about high school.

Also got lucky with genetics but for various reasons didn't have the same experience with girls. Still have trouble, some skill set is just missing, not there somehow. Sorry OP, you're kind of fucked.

Guess the best advice would be to fuck hookers regularly, once a week or so, until you have the mindset of someone who has regular sex.

Women can tell this, and when you have it they will be attracted to you and sex will come more naturally.

1/2

Regular girls are primarily looking out for two qualities in men, looks and vibes. I'm leaving out money here because i'll assume youre a broke ass reader.

Looks is obviously how good looking you are. The better the looks, the less vibes will matter (but always important).

Vibes is what a girl "feels" from you. In male terms this can be translated as: do you project confidence? Sleaziness? Insecurity? How are you being perceived by the girl?
This is that whole "energies" shit that dont mean anything to most men but is meaningful to women.

If you are not doing great on the looks department, of if you uggo, first thing is take care of yourself. A clean, well-dressed, fit ugly dude will often be better than a slightly better-looking guy who doesnt take care of himself. Everything you can do to get ahead of the competition you should do. Anything you can do to improve there also improves your value both in the sex and the dating markets.

Also, why would you even reply to the fake number thing? I thought you are only interested in a serious "connection", meaning relationship, not just casual sex?

This whole thread is bait

Level 32. I had my chances to have sex, and turned it down at the last second cause was afraid I would underperform. Do I regret it? yeah, kinda, but not a lot cause it was a one-night stand.

2/2
If youre simply respectful, not a dick, at least pretend that youre interested in what she's saying and try to make her feel like youre "in it" with her, then you got the vibes part minimally down. Anything above that is profit, talent, risk-taking, but you'll do just fine with the basics.

Any other problems you might find after this dont pertain to getting chicks, because this here is how you do it. Dont be a dick, do what you can to look the best version of yourself, and take a good look at yourself before setting your standards. If you can do these three thigs the rest is cake because yes, women are as horny as us but thank god they have slightly higher standards than us. But they realise theres only so much we can do since men have it so rough at the moment with the effects that centuries of toxic masculinity has had on our abilities to fully develop our sex lives as men. So as long as you can look good enough and behave well enough, plus adjusting your standards to an appropriate level considering your own level, then you should not have a problem finding sex. Relationships are a different thing.

Any other problems that might still exist at this point wouldnt be one of "how to get chicks", it would be one of extreme poor performance in either looks or vibes, or an inability to talk to women, or insecurity and etc, those are different issues and pertain to deeper or more complicated to resolve problems.

This is your salvation:

Genuinely curious what you mean by "be yourself". I hear that a lot. Myself doesn't know how to flirt, or escalate a relationship. What parts of myself should I be?
Or maybe swatting them off with a signature double handed punch, like I'm fighting a Gorn?
Haha, I'd honestly never even considered that. I thought those were mostly just for drug dealers and secret agents.

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Have you ever asked a girl out?

You should try to stop being so fucking ugly you loser.

oh, I'm not that kind of wizard. It's not about fear in my case, but rather apathy. Just don't care enough. Might take the chance if I have it, but in the meantime not a big deal.

My man, id really like to know more about your first paragraph there. You probably have your own idea of what went wrong there with those "crusades" that didnt work, and your exercise habits which in the end didnt seem to make a difference. What do you think went wrong there? From your perspective, what do you think should have worked differently?

>Genuinely curious what you mean by "be yourself". I hear that a lot. Myself doesn't know how to flirt, or escalate a relationship. What parts of myself should I be?

Number three goes right along with number two.
Stop fucking caring what other people think.
Yeah, if you're a weirdo, awkward and incapable of having a normal interaction with girls you won't instantly attract any, but if you work on those qualities then you will see results, in yourself and in the people who like to be around you.
If you just want to get laid and don't give a shit about what happens next, then by all means, fake it all.

As to your first paragraph, i can tell you flirting isnt nearly as important as it is made out to be. If anything, it's a tool you can use to take your game to another level, but its hardly at all necessary to get sex i gues if you dont look like a turd. Without flirting you'll have a hard time getting your pick of the herd, but look for the girl whose vibe seem to go along well with yours and if you can play nicely, she'll be down for it

It has a lot to do with being afraid. Afraid of rejection. Afraid of coming across as an idiot. Afraid of getting labeled as a creep. Afraid of losing any existing friendly relationship I already have with her, as well as anyone she knows.
I don't know, do miracle drugs really fix that shit?
Don't assume I'm broke. I make pretty good money and own my own home.
I'm probably not great in the looks or vibes department though. At leas not when it comes to women. I project confidence in areas where I am confident, such as at my job. But in areas where I have no clue what I'm doing, I'm sure it shows.
"Connection" meaning at least she actually wants to have sex with me. Relationship would be preferable, but I have nothing against casual sex. I'm not too thrilled about just hiring a hooker or similar though, where she doesn't even want to be there and is just counting down the minutes until she can leave.

>"turned it down at the last second cause was afraid I would underperform."
>"It's not about fear in my case"
>"afraid I would underperform"
>"not about fear"
>"afraid"
>"fear"

Yeah, it's just about apathy. You just don't care about it. Pussy? Go away with that shit. The self denial is strong in you.

Lmao did you swipe right on my profile or something? My silly picture is me drinking a beer inside a shopping cart in an elevator

They do indeed fix that shit. At least to some extend. They are literally made and prescribed to take away your fears, anxiety and worries. If you fully go through and get benzo's you'll definitely good to go. Those can really numb you completely, taking away all fear and care to the point of being able to shoot yourself (if you dose real high).

I've lost any hope of fucking women, all I do is go to work, the gym, and play vidya.

I always try to be a decent person, and I genuinely enjoy talking to women and listening to what they have to say. I guess one of my problems is:
I'm not really sure, to be perfectly honest. I've asked girls to hang out with me one on one, and they've accepted. I don't think I or they knew whether it was a "date" or not. I'm not really sure what differentiates a date from just hanging out one on one.
You should try to stop being so mean you meany.

The biggest kicker is when you finally have sex, and you realise it’s no where near as good as jerking off.
There’s nobody knows how to handle your cock better than yourself.

I’ve slept with a lot of women, some of them fantastically beautiful....was still a disappointment.

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>How do you do it?
Stick penis in vagina then thrust. If you accidently stick it in her butthole pretend you meant to do it.

Usually by putting the penis inside the vagina

Lotta people itt complaining about how boring sex is. Sex is anything but boring, and if boredom is the only thing you get from it when you try it then you are doing aomething seriously wrong.

Youre one of the many guys a girl will complain about, how the only thing those guys knew to do was throw their feet back and start drilling them for minutes on end.

There's nothing even remotely close to boring about sex if you actually TRY at it

>it is never, EVER too late to turn shit around
Unless you're 90 and toothless. Then it's too late.

I'd start running, lifting weights, get a new haircut, buy some new clothes. I'd go out to bars and clubs with friends. They'd spot some girl and tell me to go talk to her. I'd go approach, awkwardly try to start a conversation, or heaven forbid even more awkwardly try to dance with her. This would never get anywhere. Repeat for a few months. The failure starts weighing on me. I lose the motivation to run and lift, and eventually give up again.
How do you not care what other people think? Ultimately the goal is to attract someone, which means they need to find you attractive.
If I do ever manage to have sex, I'd prefer to see if it can continue into a relationship, so I'd rather not just be completely fake.

Add speed into that mix and you don't even get anymore how humanity has managed not to go extinct since the day it's first been synthesized .

have not been with a lot of partners but the girls i have been with ive sexed numerous times
except that one time i got drunk and had a one night stand. that is the only time i have ever really regretted having sex

It's not too bad to have spaghetti in your pants. It's only really a problem when it ends up spilling out of your pockets

If you have any sort of decent size to you get a job as a bouncer at some bar. This will force you into social situations and you'll slowly adapt and even gain some regulars who you'll recognize and they will recognize you.

I was by no means a virgin when I got a job as a bouncer but my social life had been about zero for several years prior to it and I had closed myself off pretty heavily, within a few months I was regularly at one sorority or another on the weekends after work.

Just don't treat sex like the end all be all end goal and the women around you like like people rather than potential dick holsters because even if you got a chance with that mentality you'd be so scared to perform you'd fall apart anyway. I wasn't even that sociable some nights and still would have drunk girls whisper things into my ear that would make a prostitute blush.

Also for the love of god stay off tinder. The top 80% of girls compete for the top 20% of guys. Admittedly I got the girl I'm currently seeing off okcupid but jesus christ I can't tell you some of the troglodyte women I'd get messaging me and I'm a pretty good looking 6'4" dude. Women on dating sites have this insane inflated sense of self where I'd get disgusting fat slobs making demands of me as their first message. Stuff like "Tell me a story" or "Make an interesting conversation". It's not worth your time, it'll only make you feel like shit about yourself, stay away.

If you hold sex in such high regard you obviously just lack comparison. If you've ever tried hard drugs you'd understand what we mean.

>I have no idea how to do that.
This is what moms are for. Ask her what your dad did to talk her into spreading her legs.

Easy way
>Pay a hooker.

Hard way
>meet a girl
>get to know her well
>feign intimacy
>get her drunk or wait for her to be in a delicate mood because of something that happened in her life
>make a move

I’m a virgin but I don’t really care about the act of having sex itself. I just want to find a girl I actually have a connection with and sex would be a bonus to that. Pretty much just intimacy, sexual and in other forms.

The problem is you're a shit person. Become better and you will eventually get laid.

Find woman. Make friend. Make kiss. Ask "would you like to sex?"

Profit??

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sounds to me like you are just lonely

You're either retarded on purpose or just baiting hard. Confusing one particular event with literally everything is a huge brainlet thing to do. Don't reply to me again.

People only invited you because they wanted to get friendly with a bouncer to regulary get into the club. No one really ever liked you. Girls also only flirted with you because they wanted to get into the club or were hoping for some kind of VIP access. Every girl who you didn't fuck did just try to use you and probably atleast half of the ones you fucked did too. And being the stupid moron of a bouncer you are you actually were arrogant enough to think all of that was genuine.

kek

How do you initiate sex without flirting? I thought that was a pretty key part of the process?
Honestly, something being able to change your personality that much it in itself scary. But I guess if I'm drugged up I wouldn't care, right?
Wouldn't it actually be pretty difficult to accidentally her butthole? Buttholes are usually closed pretty tightly.
I've heard rumors that nursing homes are actually fairly sexually active. No clue if that's true or not though.

well, going outside, being social, party, just generally talk to girls, and then eventually make a move, usually does the trick

personally I hate the making a move part, makes me feel pretentious and rapey, but it's what girls subconsciously want and expect(even though it's become a feminist meme to pretend that they dont), but if you never do it, you'll never get laid.

Also, this goes without saying, but you obviously have to be "somewhat" sure that she's into you aswell before you do anything. However, if you're too socially inept to be able to pick up on signals and interpret the connection that may or may not be present between the two of you, then you're fucked. Nobody can teach you how to overcome that, it must always come from "within".

Also, i'm assuming you have a decent amount of reasonably normal friends that you party with from time to time? 'Cause if you're "dat boi" who really doesn't have any friends, is never social or never parties, you're doubly fucked, and your only hope then is to find some four eyed morbidly obese gamer guurl online somewhere that is equally socially inept as yourself and trick her into having feelings for you.

But tbh, if you're over the age of 20, i'd advise you to just try to forget about the whole idea of getting laid altogether

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What differentiates a date from a regular encounter is all up to how youre going to behave leading up to, and then during, the encounter. When two adults set a date they do so without any mention of what it is. Both of them already know what this is about. In your case you have to get a feel for it in the moment. And you might have to make a move whether you think it is a date or not, because in the end, thats what you want and that is what youre going out there for. So you should honor yourself by seeking your prize without waiting for anyone's permission. You make a move when the time feels right. If she tells you that's not what she's about, at least you can know you tried, and can move on to the next challenge with confidence that you got from not acting like a pussy and failing to even try.

Oh but what to say in that moment? Be attentive and be creative. You dont need to overthink this. Just talk normally, at some point something will come up, it's something she says or you say quite naturally, and that opens up for the possibility of you throwing in a flirty remark - it'll be self-evident, you dont need to "know" flirting in order to recognize when that moment comes or know what to say. It will just come, here you need to be attentive during the convo as well as be brave to say it out loud when the moment comes and the idea hits you.

>Wizard here. Have any of you managed to have sex somehow? How do you do it?
I was getting old, one day I decided to have sex. So I called up a fat girl I knew and asked her out. After a few dates we fucked.

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Women get bored very easily since they love emotional turmoil.

Never let a woman know where you stand with them even when they have high initial interest.

Never validate or compliment a woman. Ever.

Always remain a mystery.

Unavailability and uncertainty is what attracts women and raises interest level.

Confidence comes from self improvement.

Never date a girl more than once a week.

Always be improving yourself. Gym. Life goals. Learning new things. Hobbies. Fashion. Expanding your social circle.

If you meet a girl on Tuesday don't make plans with her that weekend. It has to be the following week or weekend. Call her that Thursday or Sunday and set up a date that week. Ask for her availability. For example: Date is on the following Thursday. If she dosnt contact you don't contact her until the following Sunday. Skip that week and weekend. This is how you remain unpredictable. Skip 2 weeks if you have to.

Don't set up the same days of dates. If the first date was on a Saturday then have the next one on Sunday.

If you take a woman out Saturday night and she texts you on Wednesday the next week, just bullshiting, nothing about another date, don't set up another date if you didn't already fuck her. Have 3 - 4 texts with her and end it with "I have to get back to work I'll catch up with soon." If you did fuck set it up for Sunday.

If she dosnt text after you've fucked wait 7-10 days to text. First date fuck wait 10 days.

After you've fucked her 2 times let her do all the persuing. Never call or text.

Never see the same woman 3 weeks in a row. 2 weeks on then one week off.

Never respond to an initial text faster than 4 hours.

If you have 2 dates on the same night and the first date is going well, blow off the second date. Ghost her. Don't even text her. Women don't give a shit about your time why should you give a fuck about theirs.

I would say I feel lonely, yes, because I’ve never gotten to be my intimate self with anybody. I have good friends that care about me, I’m rarely alone and if I am I’m always texting somebody, but at the end of the day I still need someone to cuddle and have sex with. I’ve already traveled, have money, have had amazing drug experiences, and feel like this is all I really have left to do.

Patience. Make a friend first. Don't be autistic. Don't assume that you're entitled to someone else's affection. Don't get hung up. Don't be too picky.

One particular event that amounts to all of the (borderline-) sexual experience you have. Yeah, I guess it means nothing at all. You just don't care about women. Lacking this musch self-awareness... kek

What is a wizard?

I passed out drunk on a dock with a girl then I woke up and I was having sex. Pretty sure it was sexual assault but whatever virgins, see you later

Your imagination really amazes me. You always manage to come up with a reason why you can't help yourself, why your situation is hopeless. You really need to get over yourself or your life will never change for the better, only becoming worse and worse over time as you grow more and more desperate. Maybe a therapist could help you.

Rofl no shit, I never claimed that wasn't the case. Women like power and social status and in their little college lives worlds who has the most power they care about? The person who can let them skip in line to their favorite bar while everyone watches them do it.

Project more you angry little fuck, holy shit.

Guy is clearly struggling social, I recommended a means to help with that, and then you read it and started shrieking in anger.

>How do you not care what other people think?
Because I'm comfortable with who I am.
>Ultimately the goal is to attract someone, which means they need to find you attractive.
Yes, that is true but you certainly don't want to put on a mask while doing so.
Let's say a girl put a mask on while trying to attract you, you started dating and found out within the first couple months that she's nothing like what she portrayed. Someone you cannot stand being around. Would you be happy with the fact that she wasted both of your time?
Would you have preferred that she didn't essentially lie?
Well, you should want a girl who likes the real you.
The best example is whores thinking that you want a good girl and faking it until they think you're stuck or comfortable enough to not want to just give her the boot when the truth comes out.
If the real you is a complete weirdo and you know it, you obviously have things you need to work on and by the time you've worked out your own problems, hopefully the new and improved you (a new you that you're also happy with) attracts a girl and visa versa.

My relationship with my mom isn't close enough to ask such things.
Wait, are you seriously suggesting trying to kiss a friend? I thought that usually just ends in losing the friendship.
I have no clue how to read signs if someone is into me. I don't think it's ever happened, so I don't have any examples of said signs.
Most of my friends gave up on me after I got depressed and distant from too many sexless years. I'm trying to make new friends now, but it's tough.

30+ yr-old virgin. Lurk more.

>"Guy is clearly struggling social"
>"seeking approval from other anons
>"Hah, look! This guy must be angry and socially inept, I never thought they were into me! Clearly I was just using THEM! I'm the subject here, those people were CLEARLY the objects! How else could it be, since I'm a real alpha male and definitely not a borderline-retarded bouncer!"

I’m 21 and still have no idea what I’m doing. My problem is not anxiety but I feel like I am absent-minded most of the time, I listen to people but at the same time I’m not really listening, shit like that. Also in conversation I am just not spontaneous enough to flirt or carry the conversation in any meaningful way. I’ve tried to better myself for years, and I’ve improved fairly, but not the point where I’m able to build solid relationships with people. I still pretty much have zero friends. I try not to think about because it gets me depressed, but the older I get the harder it is to ignore.

Well if it's your first time then I doubt any girl's going to enjoy it. You'll most likely blow your load in 30 seconds. You're overthinking this. How long do you plan to be a wizard?

This sort of thing is what makes this so hard for me.
>without any mention
>both of them already know
>it'll be self-evident
Normal people have this assumption that everyone is equally capable of reading all of these cues. None of this is self-evident to me. I'd have to be watching an interaction like a hawk, analyzing every minute detail, and trying to process everything while still somehow devoting half my brain to taking part in the conversation.
What did you say to ask her out? Like word for word? I'm still trying to figure out what makes something obviously a date.

I've read through this whole thread and being somewhat knowledgeable in the matter, it became rather obvious to me that you might be suffering from asperger syndrome. I'd advise you to do a bit of research on the web about it and if you think it's symptoms may apply to you, seek professional help by a psychiatrist. With professional help many people with aspergers manage to lead a fairly normal life.

fuck a few hookers to get anxiety out of the way, its definitely worth it. You'll realize sex isn't that big of a deal and get over any insecurities you may have about lack of experience. Once you have the issue of sex out of the way you need to work on the process of getting women to have sex with you. Go out and flirt with real women and simply learn the process. Just talk to them like people but add in sexual jokes/innuendos here and there and touch them playfully/lightly and try to put yourself in a situation with them that would naturally lead to sex and just build it up. You will fail a lot at first. It's not a big deal its just like learning any other skill dont let it get to you.

Show us where the bad man triggered you.

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Hey man, it was just a suggestion, you want to get all bent out of shape and throw personal insults then you've already lost the argument before it even began. For the record I dealt with quite a few angry little guys trying to show off for the crowd too. You're not providing anything novel.

Good god you make this shit sound complicated. Do people really follow giant rulebooks like this?
Please, fix yourself before you become me. Don't fall into the trap of focusing on career.
I don't know that I really have any control in the matter. I'll be a wizard until either a miracle occurs, or I die.
I've never been diagnosed with anything, but I wouldn't be terribly surprised. I'm definitely not normal. It seems to be fairly trendy these days to be on "the spectrum". It's like a beautiful rainbow.

I'm 30 years old, have been on Yea Forums on/off since 2006, and even I am not familiar with a wizard being a 30+ year old virgin.

>just like learning any other skill
Except the stakes are much higher. Any fuck up could possibly ruin your life. All it takes is one woman thinking you're a creep and telling everyone about it.
I have no problem with practicing skills and failing until I succeed, but this is closer to practicing russian roulette.

Yes, you can carry a conversation. I'll give you a trick; just ask questions and let her ramble on. Sprinkle in some "I hate that too" and "you're totally right I feel the same way" and boom you're gonna get laid, user

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Well here ya go.

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I see it a lot on /r9k/

I'm not sure to be honest.
I don't have "game"
I'm an ex-tranny for God's sake. So I'm not attractive or super masculine. Not rich either so idk why anyone would want to sleep with me, it just kinda happens.

Wow, you're pathetic getting so angry about absolutely nothing important. I'm sure you're great at talking to women because you both just shriek and talk shit like nobody is gonna slap you up one day

ITT OP refuses to accept responsibility for their shittiness and instead blames his inability got get laid on either
>Girls
>Other guys
>Personal factors that cannot be changed
None of which prevent you getting laid. I am a fat, bespotted, autistic 31 year old man who plays an MMORPG much of my free time and was a NEET until I was 28. I got my girlfriend when I was 28, shortly before I found work in education (started out as a Spec Needs TA, bigged up my autism as experience dealing with that the kids I would be helping deal with, relatability etc). We are trying for a baby now and she has been dropping super not subtle hints she wants marriage as well. If you cannot get laid, I promise you the problem is you. Not your looks, but your personality. Try to become a less shitty human being.

>I'm totally an oldfag but never heard of a Wizard.
Why would you lie on the internet?

>3 replies
>I'm the one who's getting angry

kek

Are you oblivious to the fact that you are angry?

Don’t be a fucking loser.

Why do I have to care to know everything? I can't triforce either, and I could give a shit less about that crap

What are you talking about? I know full well that my inability to get laid is entirely my fault. That just makes me feel even worse about myself.

It reeks of "I'm so smart I must shit on everybody for everything they say" in this thread. Buncha fucking queers

I was you 8 years ago. Soon you'll acquire a taste for fatty flesh, grannies, trannies, big fucking fat hogs, etc.

So called "degenerate"

Guy argues like a far lefty on reddit. I think he's lost

Nobody over 29? Bro you gotta get that high score! I slept with a 43 year old when I was 28, my record is 15 years older. It was 9 years for almost a decade, when I was 20 I slept with my friend's sister who was a stripper and 29 years old. But man, that 43 year old, smoking hot, and her son called her from college as I laid next to her silently and she stroked my cock as she talked to her son who was like 5 years younger than me. And I was tripping on shrooms, was a good night for sure.

>tl;dr you're missing out on the older cougars brah

...okay

I don't go on reddit, first off. Secondly, I just like to party and have a good time, and you're the one talking shit being ridiculous, and now you're deflecting your ridiculousness as if it's everybody else's fault, grow up dude.

So improve.

Inb4 it's not that easy.

Yes it is.

I'm not an expert on women, but I've fucked a lot of them, so my advice has to count for something. I'll tell you what I've noticed and what works for me.

Chicks can tell when you're depressed. They will avoid you like the plague. It's much easier to meet a lady when you're in a good place mentally.

Never go out looking for chicks alone. It scares them off.

I have never gotten laid faster than when I was out at the bars for a bachelor party. It works every time. Plan a fake bachelor party just to meet horny girls.

Chicks like when you have female friends. It lets them know they can trust you.

Memorize jokes. Bitches love jokes.

Bitches love hobbies. Join a hiking club and it'll be you and 2 dozen recently divorced housewives on every trip.

Bitches love an artist. Play an instrument. Paint a picture. Take a photo class.

Never talk about video games with a chick unless you know for 100 percent that she is a gamer. Bitches hate gaming.

It never hurts to work out. Exercise every day. Bitches like dudes who go to the gym.

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I would just like to add that bitches hate dudes who brag about going to the gym. Just let it show, don't talk about it, ya dig?

find one of these

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If the good majority of men can get laid, does it mean that the advice in this thread comes to most men naturally, meaning that there’s actually something very wrong with us? Everyone in my life has been able to convince a girl to take her pants off, and to me it’s a completely foreign, almost alien thought.

i might be super drunk and high but i think this image is really fucking cool

The world is cold. What about having a loving heart also?