hello you stupid retards,
i am about to begin the process of ending my life. I have two bottles of prescription painkillers, 3 liters of merlot, and a big knife for wrist cutting.
I will be pill popping and wine imbibing for a bit until I run a warm a warm bath and slit my wrists open. will be posting about my life.
anons, company would be appreciated. you can ask me whatever you want too.
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stream it u fuck
will you be livestreaming kind sir?
Don’t die pls
My discord's Emperor Crimson#5228
talk to me. Why are you doing this?
Wasn't planning to. Don't really have the setup for it
Please don't kill yourself
Why do you want to kill yourself?
> ...3 liters of merlot
> of merlot
> merlot
You deserve to die.
how about you don’t do it and just get drunk and talk to anons all night
Hardly any people care about me and the ones that do are entirely inept at helping me. I have my cat and my mom, who is basically an overgrown teenager. No one else gives a shit.
I've been depressed as fuck the last four years, battling alcoholism and bulimia and being a huge faggot. Just sick of it for the last time.
I mean I have a handle of rum too that i've already been pulling from
You can stream with a phone. It will be shitty, but you can do it. Do it pussy.
I can help you. My discord's Emperor Crimson#5228
You're very unlikely to actually manage in killing yourself unless you also take antiemetics. Trust me I've been thinking about killing myself a long time. If you want results, you probably need to read up on better methods like exit bags. Or get a gun, I guess.
Don't kill yourself tonight, though. At least give it some time to make sure you really want to. No harm in waiting one more day, right?
Please don't kill yourself of make jokes about it. Thank you.
please dont. life can always get better after the rough parts. there are people who will care about you, they just dont know it yet. find them, dont waste any time. find them and love yourself like they can.
Handle of rum is acceptable.
Don't listen to these SJW faggots trying to talk you out of your decision with their faggy discord servers.
You do you. I'm guessing by the volume of alcohol at your disposal you're an adult.
Also I'm sure that because you took the time to post this to Yea Forums, you are not in fact going to kill yourself. Tonight.
If you want help get help. If you want to die, then kill yourself.
I'm sipping the glenlivet 12 tonight. What's your rum?
Here
Yo call someone
Fuck you puss, Kill yourself.
You better do somthing comfy when you commit an hero.
Why
How about we just call your mother a dick snorting whore instead?
Huh
Do you live with your mom?
Do you live upstairs? If so, make sure that you don't leave the water running and flood damage downstairs with bloody water.
How old is your Mom, and where is your Dad at?I
Post picture of your cat, with the bottles of merlot next to it, for a timestamp.
Drinking Ron Diaz. Of course I don't want to die but I'm still going to try. I literally cannot stand being alive anymore. Im only 23 and I've been sick of life for just about every single one of those years
Cutting my wrists will do the trick. I've cut myself enough to have the balls for it.
appreciate the advice but doubt this would do anything. obviously if i called someone they would try to talk me out of it but that doesnt mean they give a shit. just means they dont want it on their conscience. Same if a suicidal called anyone
when people say they have wine by the liters it means they bought a box of wine, A BOX, otherwise they would say bottles
don t kill yourself drinking from a box of wine ffs
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Gonna need some timestamp proof
drive to my house lets chill, we can do some acid and ride my motorcycle. sounds more fun than puking and taking a bath bro. im 100% serious.
Not gonna find the cat, also wine is upstairs. Here’s my time stamp. Christ I look like shot right now.
have you done any hallucinogens? do so before you die faggot.
I'm the one who mentioned the antiemetics.
I get wanting to do it. I just don't think you should do it tonight. You don't sound like you're totally prepared.
There's no harm in waiting at least one day, right?
You should join us on SanctionedSuicide. Talk a little about it first. We're not anti-suicide.
Don’t do it. I’ve been there. I was in the EXACT same spot as you... shitty life, shitty parents, shitty job with nowhere to go.
Instead of killing myself, I said to myself I would take one last ride and do whatever the fuck I wanted. Pack up my car, hit the road, and just drive and live off the little savings I had.
I ended up camping for a while just to clear my head. I knew shit about cooking or fires, but I figured it out, too. Once I was alone out there and disconnected from the world’s bullshit, I discovered that life to me was more about the experiences that were just around the corner. And if I killed myself none of what has happened since then would have happened. I would just cease to exist.
I ended up driving cross country and living off the little I had for about a month until I stumbled into a new city I liked and something just ‘clicked’ and I stuck around.
One thing led to another an now I’m here with my own family, a decent job, and a new life. The new life is just around the corner.
Your cellphone will suffice
Respect to you bro
do you really think a depressed, suicidal person is going to have a good time on acid or shrooms if they've never done it before
I don't really care about you, but if you have a mom and a cat, don't kill yourself, keep up for them, specially the cat, think about how it won't be able lo live without you
Liquor guy here.
Look bro, I almost killed myself a few times. Had the barrel in my fucking mouth at one point.
I didn't actually want to die either.
So when I pussed out I changed my life. One little thing at a time. First I got out of a toxic relationship. Then I got a better job(better than min wage mind you, not "good"). Then I moved places with a friend. And a bunch of other incremental changes.
I'm still a depressed alcoholic piece of shit who probably should have pulled that trigger, but I'm closer to being okay with myself now.
This aint a fucking pep talk. What I did took effort, and I'm still a fuckoff who probably will end up taking his own life at some point, but my point is that you can at least have some decent time on this planet if you put in a micron of effort.
Shit, you don't even need to start now. Just wake up tomorrow and clean your room and forgive yourself for being a degenerate.
done acid twice and shrooms twice. a big dose of shrooms once cause i read that it cured depresion. did it all right, didnt work
I have something lined up that I cant just abandon. Also Ive done lots of camping like that and it hasnt done the trick. idk man, for a long time I thought that would do it for me but it hasnt. glad it worked for you tho user
>clean your room
yes ive read jordan peterson user lol
I think my problem is more internal than external. I just dont know what to change
Im so fucked. I had plans to whore myself to a few older guys tonight and Im way too wasted to drive and actually do it. God I fucking hate myself. how the fuck is it not possible to hate yourself? I should all this responsibility and I do it well but Im being crushed every second
Shit bro, liquor dickhead here.
You look exactly like me 10 years ago.
I wasn't referencing that faggot piece of shit. FYI.
Internal and external are interchangeable in many circumstances.
Im 23 and usually have a clean shaved face and a haircut. Just way too depressed to even take care of myself right now. Gained like 30 lbs since antidepressants dont do shit and now I cant even attract the men I used to so that I can ease the pain at least a little. It fucking sucks. I've had plans to kill myself several times but I always just drink til I pass out to protect myself
HEY YOU, YOU TILL BROWSING Yea Forums LIKE AN IDIOT,
GET BLACKED THREADS LIKE A NIGGER.
YOU NIGGER YOU'RE RACIST LIKE A NIGGER, NGIGER, NGIGER, RASIST NEN MEN https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc
WE ARE SOME PROUDI TANNIES, POSTING GORE AND CP, JOIN JOIN JOIN YOU NIGGER, RACSIT.
VISIT T H I S SERVER, NO NIGGERMODS NO YANNNIES, YOU'RE FUCKING WELCOME
N I G G E R, Visit https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc before the FBI raid you for lolicon!????!!!%
>Stop BE YOU
>BECAUSE YOU cant GREENTEXT, JOIN /U/ YES /U/ JOIN /US/ https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc
TRANNIE_ID:zf0y5fe7rf
Hah, that plan only works until it doesn't.
Had a friend hang himself one night after I left him blackout drunk.
alcoholic Yea Forumsrother here, don't do it OP. You can change and get better even if its just one little baby step at a time. I've been where you are, almost exactly (excluding the merlot cause im not a faggot), trust me its not worth it. Don't kill yourself.
>t. drink free two years, glad to not have killed self
David ?
Also, unfortunatly 4chin hasn't endeared me to the boipussy movement but where do you live? It must be a small town or something because I have a few gay friends who I've seen smash things far more hideous than you.
well, as I always said, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, you are young as fuck, you will get out of this rut, you will meet a lady/dude that love you for who you are. you will look back at when you were yonger and think of the wasted years, but still good years. Old fag here (35), it just some people get their golden years later, dont despair.
>tries to save man on verge of suicide with gay sex
Fuck you, you sober goddamn pussy. I bet you go to AA and cry about how horrible you used to be and how it's "not your fault" because "you have no control".
I hope he kills himself before he catches your disease you limp dick turtle fucking 9/11 apologist hitler chowder chugger.
HEY YOU, YOU TILL BROWSING Yea Forums LIKE AN IDIOT,
GET BLACKED THREADS LIKE A NIGGER.
YOU NIGGER YOU'RE RACIST LIKE A NIGGER, NGIGER, NGIGER, RASIST NEN MEN https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc
WE ARE SOME PROUDI TANNIES, POSTING GORE AND CP, JOIN JOIN JOIN YOU NIGGER, RACSIT.
VISIT T H I S SERVER, NO NIGGERMODS NO YANNNIES, YOU'RE FUCKING WELCOME
N I G G E R, Visit https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc before the FBI raid you for lolicon!????!!!%
>Stop BE YOU
>BECAUSE YOU cant GREENTEXT, JOIN /U/ YES /U/ JOIN /US/ https:\\discord.link\\RW8YBc
TRANNIE_ID:1dlce09alq
Im from Wisconsin
I mean I can get dick its just that ever man Ive ever dated has been a huge piece of shit and Ive gotten so messed up that I can really only have sex if its to handle my emotions or for money.
If you're gonna kill yourself could ya help a Yea Forumsro out and give me some money
If you want my student debt and medical debt, you can have it
You mean you get paid for it or you pay for it?
Also, that's not a problem specific to your ass diddling ways. As a dude who has dated a few women, I can confidently say that it's us.
Alcoholics tend to attract the worst of humanity.
Feels bad man. I can help you setup a stream on a site i use if you're gonna an hero.
They pay me for it. Im young and have bills to pay. Plus its the only thing that makes me feel valuable. Ive recieved so little affection in my life that I need currency to quantify my worth
drink alcohol first then do the other thing. also just dont do it
>antidepressants dont do shit
can you explain more about this?
Honestly that's a pretty sweet deal.
Unfortunately I work a shit job to support myself because women don't tend to ever need to pay for sex.
About those bills. Do you pay your parents rent?
Show the homework problem on the other side of the page? Might as well give us something to do while waiting lol.
Why is the wine upstairs if you are going to drink it?
Ugh don't do that. My gf just did the pill thing and I've been in the hospital pretty much all day every day since visiting her.
Gotta keep her entertained and help make fun of people around her.
I was on fluoxetine for a while all it did was make me insanely manic and unstable. Now Im on zoloft and my acute depressive episodes are better but in general everything still sucks. Its just that I dont drink myself sill and beg god to kill me on a biweekly basis anymore
Its not a good deal considering that theyre disgusting and generally manipulative. Im attracted to men, like really really, and its still disgusting. Just so many pervs and theyre so freaky.
My parents don't pay my rent. I actually just finished undergrad, my parents dont support me besides stuff like food when I stay with them ofc. Im visitng for the month before i start my hospital internship/grad school so that I can help take care of my bro and do some work (brother has down syndrome)
I can weigh in on this one:
Antidepressants are a stop gap measure that are usually used as a line of both first and last defense against a myriad of mental aliments.
They have "success rates" of between 10-50 percent. However they also have horrible side effects, many, like what OP mentioned are weight gain which can have the opposite effect if the patient is preoccupied with physical appearance. They also usually affect cognition in a negative way.
Post her picture? Don't have to show face.
Ha, its a physics problem from when I was an engineering student. I switched to nutrition halfway through my college career. Very ironic considering my alcoholism and inadequately controlled bulimia
I think my cognition is improved just from stability but overall the weight gain is killing me. Better than being super manic and depressive on other drugs or without medication though. Kind of damned if I do and damned if I dont. It sucks
Worst part is I can;'t just quit since I've gone through SSRI withdarawl and it suck and I hardly ever see my psychiatrist so I have no idea if I should and even if I did I wouldnt know how
why did you stop doing physics
Picture of cat please
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I passed all my physics just no longer needed it after stopped being engineer
cat is a huge retard. stand by for pic
Where were you born, user?
oh. i meant why did you stop doing engineering? sorry im really baked rn
My mom sent me this snap lol so sorry for cringe
Other pic was too big
He’s such a pussy retard he’s annoying although we got another cat from my old coach who is cool
Kitty is legit as fuck. Got her from my old football coach. His new wife was abusing her and he had to get rid of her. Closest I had to a father
thats adorable. what music are you listening to rn
Well, I was born in texas but have lived in WI for my whole life past one year of age
I quit it cause I didn't like it. I was talented at programming but only did computer engineering because thats what my dad does and I have daddy issues. My dad is a very talented engineer nd I've always looked up to him despite the minimal role he has had on my life.
I tried taking a pic of my cat but the file size is too big. Here is one from awhile back.
Just some stuff on shuffle. Mostly listen to pop music. Seeing Carly Rae Jepsen on Friday, whcih come to think of it is a good reason to not down the bottles of vicodin and oxy that I have
that's fair. if you were talented at computer programming why didnt you just change to that? sorry if this is invasive but like youve already made your suicide public so i figure nothing's off the table lol
Dude looks chill as fuck.
Does "Kitty" live with you or your parents?
Also, I don't know your situation but have you tried medical pot for any of your mental issues?
And I mean the medical stuff. It's worlds away from smoking a bowl/joint/blunt/volcano/ect...
Super cute, especially the big tail lol
Thanks. She is hard to take pictures of because she is all black.
i have the same problem
Figured it would be more fruitful to be a dietitian, which is what I am studying to be and will be accredited in about a year. Since Im gat I figure whoever I marry will likely have a decent salary so I shouldnt sorry super hard about money. Although maybe that was a mistake. Im also passionate about it since I used to make myself puke almost daily for liek three years and I want to help people like that especially men sionce society doesnt give a fuck about men
She is so chill. She lives with me, although we have a weird cat swapping schedule between me and my bros house (live together) and my moms
I do smoke weed and honestly it does wonders. The problem is Im in healthcare and currently applying for many things and so I can only smoke for small periods at a time because of drug tests. RN is one such time that I can smoke which is cool
Very sweet kitty. What's his/her name?
damn i could honestly use that im a fat fuck lmao
your cat will miss you
An hero on cam fag
Her name is literally kitty. My old football coach named her. Pretty sure he is on the spectrum which would explain the name. He was an asshole, literally screamed that we were fairy faggots after we lost a game lol. He was still the closest I had to male role model though. So I cherish Kitty,
answer me a quick question op, why bulimia? how come you found easier to throw-up instead of just not eating it in the first place, i really like eating but also really dislike vomiting and throwing away good food for nothing, specially because i'm a fat retard that cant help but shove huge amounts of food into my mouth, at least i'm not being a ingrate fuck and throwing it all away after the dopamine kicks in
I hope to help motivated indivudlas like you! Thats why I quit what I was doing and hopefully will have something to live for one day
lmao that sounds like my dad
well user. if you dont decide to do what it is you say youre doing, i'd love to hear the fruits of your labor so that i can get better myself. ps. i love your cats lol
Uggghhhh dude, I'm so sorry.
Any chance you'd be able to finish your degree and move somewhere with better medical marijuana laws?
Well bulimia is complicated. I had many periods where I fasted for a day then ate on another. Ate like 1200 cal every other day. Other days it would be like 1800 per day. Or I would lift weights and then just eat until I couldnt stand it anyone. Other days it was food then Id stick my puke pen down my throat and barf it all up. Otherwise Id go find a hideaway and binge then barf.
It is completely irrational. I understand your point. Not trying to say that it makes sense though. Just that it takes people over and kilsl you. ESpecisally men since society oncly cares about women. Espeically when it comes to eating and eating disorders. I had pride and all this stuff but as a gay Id like to see at least something about the eating disorders present in my community.
you can kik me at cut2thefeeling if you want
actually, ive been thinking that after I finish my clinicals here I might go to canada so I can blaze lol. Really helps keep me off the liquor which is based
Saw user talking about how he went around traveling and would recommend that before really ending it all. A road trip can do wonders on clearing out ones head and get to maybe experience something knew. If it doesn't change your mind then least you got to travel to places
bump
OP, what's your mom look like and how old is she? Sounds like she could use some consoling soon.
What’s led you to make this decision?
Not gonna be a pussy hiding my intentions either, I dont want you to kill yourself user
Let's move in and help each other (no gay shit). It'll sort you out.
Shes only 49 and skinny your a faggot though
you'll get all the hjs and bjs
No one cares!
Nah dont you have a cat to take care of dont be a cunt to yourself or it, besides do you really want to entertain these summer incels that still think this is a secret clubhouse of edginess?
Welcome to /U/ (On The Discord App)
Discord Link
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A server with...
>Actual *E-Girls*
>Boipussy, Nudes, Yea Forums Memes, NSFW, VC, Megalinks, Voila, Dropbox, Kik swap, Nude swap, Porn swap, Snapchat, pornchat etc
Post what you want Mods don't give a shit. JVCF
NO, no gay shit. Unironically, you move in with me for a year, I'll get you turned into a well-adjusted, productive member of society.
>hello you stupid retards,
calls us stupid retards as hes about to off himself
live for the cat !
also try e v e r y t h i n g that you wanted to
based user desu
Offer's open to any user who's willing to do it and wants to change their life for the better. I'll help you with socialization so you stop being autistic.
Let me guess...you were that homeless dude in San Francisco who took a big meaty shit on my windshield last week while my kids were in the car...
where are you located
Are you banging your "friend?"
you have sad eyes user, I know because people tell me I do as well. I'm sorry life has been hard to you, I've been through a spinal injury and am in debt because of it and addicted to painkillers so I understand addiction. I hope you find peace wherever you go and hopefully one day I will meet you there.
Southern California at the moment but might be willing to relocate if it's the right kind of town.
YOU DIDN'T SAY THAT YOU FAG. IT WAS ROBIN WILLIAMS. AND HE KILLED HIMSELF!!!.
FUCK YOU, LIAR.
So here's the thing. You know how people say, 'It gets better'? Well, that's half true. By that, I mean it's true for about half of people, maybe less, but for a very specific reason. Life is fucking hard; for some of us, it is on nightmare mode from the start, and we don't ever get to turn it down. Life will take everything from you and keep taking, and when it does, every time it does, you make a decision. You decide to keep going, to keep walking through the shit and the snow and the sleet, or you stop, and you sleep, and you let it all go.
When people say it gets better, they keep walking. They keep walking, and sometimes it gets worse before it gets better, sometimes they thought it was rock bottom and they keep fucking going and it is worse. But you just keep moving. You keep moving and trying. You gotta be like a Greek God sometimes, dragging yourself out of a bed you don't want to leave, but you start enjoying the pain. You start getting used to it and saying, fuck it, I can make it harder - I actually DO have control. You go for a run when you want to die. You force yourself to smile. You ask a girl or boy out, just to prove you can. You take yourself to new heights. You delete apps or games or habits that make you apathetic or distract you. You pick up a book 40 times and put it down 39. But you keep going. Life won't reward you for this, but eventually, inevitably, it will kill you, or you will have walked to a place that is better than the last. Those are the only options.
Eventually it gets better, but it's because you don't stop.
he has the right. it's none of your business
youtube.com
Don't do it, Brian may save you
Listen to ‘hold on’ by Wilson Phillips.