Hey Yea Forums, I bit off more than I can chew, got nothing against the Marine Corps but it’s too much for me...

Hey Yea Forums, I bit off more than I can chew, got nothing against the Marine Corps but it’s too much for me. How do I get tf out or get a different job?

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Go AWOL, or open Google and ask the same question either or

Hurt yourself.
Don't go AWOL. You're in the middle of nowhere and would get eaten by wildlife.

The easiest and best way to get out is to fail your fitness test. The military kicks people out if they don't meet physical standards. They lose like 1000 recruits or more a year because of this.

Here's the trick. If you get discharged due to not meeting physical standards, in 3-6 months, the discharge automatically turns into a "honorable discharge".

If you get anything other than honorable, the only job you'll ever get would be as a dish washer.

Smoke pot and get piss tested. Tell them you’re an addict and need help, you’ll get kicked out with an admin discharge and you can try to get it turned into honorable later on

The whole point of marines is that they fucking destroy your psyche so you can be a machine. People try to pussy out all the time. Id say just get on with it. It probably wont kill you and if it does you go down a legend

Just tell your OIC that you're a pussy and can't handle it.

Go back to stopping bullets with your body.

I'm not the retard that joined the Marines.

You can literally just tell your C.O. you can't do it anymore, after yelling at you 2-3 times he will help you get released, calmishly.

The consequence is OP will get a discharge that says "other than honorable". That doesn't go away.

I just ran a 3rd class pft today bro, it was just practice but fuck.

I feel this.

Please, what's your MOS, motor-tuh?

Other than honorable doesnt mean dishonorable.

Don't go AWOL. I did and it sucked. I have sn Other Than Honorable and am not eligible for shit from the VA or any job benefits. Try to hack it if you can, if not, go talk to the Chaplain.

Sure you can’t stick it out and get a shit MOS like delivering water or something? Otherwise, just fail physical fitness standards I guess

Its still bad. If he just fails all his pft's he'll get honorable discharge.

That's not a real job.

I’m not from the states lol I always thought that was just some shitty job you could get

Start putting random military equipment up you ass, this is both pleasurable and self serving. Try to choose items that will be missed, like the captains whistle or the keys to the humvee. Then go to the doctor to complain about stomach cramps and a whistley asshole. When he mentions your hidden treasure trove, don't tell them your gay, they will see right through that, instead when the doctor isn't looking shove something important to him, like his medical degree right up your ass.

That's from a Pauly Shore movie. And that movie was stupid as fuck. People can get their own water.
There is no cushy jobs other than "services". They hold positions like mailroom, or work in the gym checking people in and washing towels.

Or drink lots of headlight fluid.

>keys to the humvee

Oh, trust me it is.

There was also some oil delivery thing with the mechanics. Not sure if that shit still exist since they were trying to get rid of it.

Arent trannys now not allowed in the military?? Didn't trump change that? If so just say you're transexual

Why not eat the elbow grease?

toughen up if you can.
What schoolhouse you at OP?

Just do your 4 years faggot. Get out claim PTSD. Get school paid for and get PAID while your in school. Then buy a house with your va loan.

Defect to russia

Serious question; How come people never take into consideration the 8 year contract thing when 2nd Great War is about to unleash?

Simple. Follow these instructions.

1. Strip to your whitey tidies and enter the latrine with your M-14 and full-metal jacket rounds.
2. Wait until Joker comes in on his nightly patrol.
3. Tell him "I am .. . in a world . . . of shit!"
4. Execute the Manual of Arms:
"Left shoulder ... hut! Right shoulder ...hut! Lock and load! Order ... hut!
5. Insert your pre-loaded magazine into the rifle and bring it to Order Arms Position.
6. Continue shouting "This is my rifle! There are many like it, but this one is mine. My rifle is my best friend! It is my life! I must master it as I must master my life!
Without me ..."
7. When your racket brings in the Drill Seargeant, wait until he screams at you enough to get you mad and then shoot him.
8. Look at Joker for a few seconds, then blow your brains out while sitting on a urinal.
9. No longer in the marines.

How can you claim PTSD if you never go anywhere?
Tell the psychiatrist "I got yelled a lot, reminded me of my father's abuse?"

That's not believable.

Batman never used guns. And joker never does "patrols" with harley quinn. Atleast not in the movies.

It's Joker from Full Metal Jacket fag.

Never seen it. I bet it went straight to bluray.

Wasn't that guy called Jester? Or Buffon?

Can't really remember. But the first half of that movie is the reason why I joined my country military.

You've actually got to be fucking kidding me

Nah, it's Joker.

Well I don't watch DC movies. They make good cartoons, but the live action one's suck.
Marvel universe is better.
If its a good Batman cartoon, I'll watch it.

Marvel is shit. The Bale Batman movies are great.

Tell them you want to kill yourself. Or just kys. Seriously we don't need weak bitches in the military. So just tell them you want to kill yourself, safest way to get out. No bodily harm, just keep lying to the terapist, make them beloeve its work related stress and boom.

The only good things from the Bale Batman was the villains. Joker was awesome, and lots of people mimic that performance. Bane was funny as fuck.
I can't find the movie, batman: full metal jacket though. What year was it made?

>batman: full metal jacket though
You have to be 18 or older to post here.

Man, my shit eating cousin is 19 and doesn't even know who Matilda or Mafalda are.

And you want those fucks lurking and shitting about?

The fastest way off the depot is to graduate

The Laura of wet blankets enters the thread.

Instead of participating in thread discussion, this Laura just wants to point out that you're currently at the edge of the board and about to die. =^_^=

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Get 2 alcohol related incidents

Also
U.
S.igned (the)
M.otherfucking
C.ontract

It's not hard if you're not a bitch

Dress like a tranny

I make 27$ an hour. Got kicked out of navy for failing piss test.

>If you get anything other than honorable, the only job you'll ever get would be as a dish washer.

Not anymore. It used to be pretty true. But now people don't necessarily look at that as an unforgiveable mistake.

I suppose the consequences aren't as bad as they use to be. Considering that the military of the USA has deteriorate and relies mostly on reservist. I doubt it has the man power to put up another Iraq.

>AWOL
In the Marines, you don't go AWOL, you go UA
>Unauthorized absence

If you're an officer resign your commission if you're not wait until the contracts done I'm going with one hell of a resume if you just want to switch branch you're going to be lowered to rank but you can that's about as much as I'm going to get from what I remember about research about joining the military

The fastest and easiest way out is straight through. Unless you don't care about a BCD or DD

>How do I get tf out

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Enjoying the spring collection Klinger

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This. Had a buddy of mine get out of the Corps a few months ago due to “failure to adapt” because of his anxiety and depression. He did some shit with artillery and fucking hated it

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Please remove spam Bots

having an honorable discharge after 6 years in the navy allowed me to walk out of the military and into a 120k a year tech job. Granted I wasn't some stupid human IED detector in the marine corps, i just listened to whales fart and chinks driving noisy submarines.

Tough it out you fucking pussy. The discipline you learn in the marines will pay dividends for the rest of your life. For fucks sake, grab your life by the horns and be a man. If you hate it just do your 4 and get free college.

marine corps is easy af just dont be a pussy

MarineFag here
E-4, what’s so bad OP.
It’s literally not that hard.

Jesus you're and idiot

You're fucking with us. Just tell me you know that fucking Kubrick's Full Metal Jacket is not a DC movie

Now that Disney bought Fox, doesn't that make Klinger a Disney Princess?

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Pushing it in deeper does not work all the time that's what she said kek
If not recommend that he sees help from the shrink
And sucking it up can only go so far civ or Soldier her only human man and fighting yourself and not seeking help is dumb

Fuckin pussy

>FBI checks this thread and goes to your base.

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Despite what Colonel Flagg and major Burns
Say you should see a shrink

Yeah, I saw that meme too.

I spent the last 2 and a half years of my 6 year contract in the Army fucking hating it. Just wanted a normal life again. My advice? Suck it up and push through. You'll thank yourself later due to the free college and other benefits due to an honorable discharge.

You'd think. I saw my 1SG make a dude intentionally failing PT tests go through all sorts of extra PT, just so he could prove he was physically fit to pass the PT test. Now if the soldier kept failing, he could tag his ass with malingering or some other shit.